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WTF?! Main points (in bold) from Leo's video The Dark Side Of Meditation You cannot be following actualized.org and not meditating, that's not going to work because the stuff I'm gonna be talking about is going completely over your head because you have no idea what awareness or consciousness really are and how little of it you have unless you've started meditating so that's for the newbies 01:01 but what I'm talking about in this episode is really some advice for those of you who've already installed the habit, have been meditating and are now starting to reach into the intermediate and advanced stages of meditation. So this means you've been meditating consistently every single day for at least six months or 12 months or a couple of years 01:25 what's going to happen is weird stuff will arise as you meditate and you will discover perhaps in a shocking way that meditation is not all rainbows and butterflies the way you initially assumed. Some of the stuff that comes up is freaky, weird and downright alien, and very negative sometimes and it can blindside you and sabotage your meditation habit so what I'm going to talk about here is the dark side, stuff that's counterintuitive, stuff that you would not expect to arise from a simple meditation habit. 02:10 So what is this stuff? Well there's a whole list. Now before I tell you all this stuff I want to preface it by saying that you're not necessarily going to encounter all this so don't go hunting for it because a lot of this stuff can be negative and if you don't experience it that's fine. These are like side effects. If a drug has side effects that means it can happen, it doesn't mean that it will happen to you, but if it does happen to you a lot of this stuff is very common, don't be surprised, you've been warned. 02:42 So firstly expect hyper annoyance and crankiness, this is very common and usually it comes in spells like you're meditating for weeks for weeks, everything's going great, you're becoming more calm and more peaceful and then you reach one week in your meditation routine where you're just annoyed by everything, hyper annoyed by little, little tiny insignificant things that you would think you're totally beyond, like the air- conditioning or the humming of your refrigerator will start to annoy the hell out of you or maybe your cat or dog will start to annoy the hell out of you for no reason and that might take you by surprise, or you just become cranky and you have this kind of spell of crankiness that lasts for a few days or for an entire week or maybe for an entire month. 03:38 Also expect hyper judgmentalism when you become hyper judgmental of everyone around you, especially people that are close to you like your family, your spouse, your girlfriend, your boyfriend, your children, and so forth, expect that. It will come about in spells again, might last for a few days may last for a week, might last for a whole month and I don't want you to be blindsided by that. 04:04 Expect wild mood swings up and down that can last from days to weeks where you feel terrible or you feel really high like you're on cloud nine because you've been meditating now and you're getting growth and everything's feeling wonderful and you think that that's just how it is now, that's your new level, you think you've arrived but a few weeks pass and then you crash into some deep depression and you wonder to yourself "no no I've lost it. What happened? I thought I'd arrived" but see that was just a wrong expectation. The fact is you will have many wild mood swings throughout your entire meditation career so get used to that. 04:47 Also expect feelings of loneliness to come over you, sometimes expect feelings of disgust, anger and frustration and these can vary from very mild forms of these emotions to very, very heavy forms where you just feel like you're the most lonely isolated human being on the entire surface of the earth, or you're just completely pissed off and angry about the the political party and what it's doing to the country or whatever. 05:25 Expect crying, that's totally fine, nothing wrong with that, expect insomnia, sometimes you're going to have these manic episodes where we have a lot of energy come up and you're not going to be able to fall asleep because you're excited to either by new possibilities or you're agitated or anxious about something that might happen. 05:46 Expect depression and meaninglessness to wash over you. I can almost guarantee that if you're going to meditate for longer than a year that you will be hit by some serious spells of depression and that's totally normal, that's par for the course, and you will at times feel like your entire life is meaningless, everything you've done is meaningless, your family is meaningless, your career is meaningless, your relationships are meaningless, even meditation is meaningless and self-improvement is meaningless. You'll experience all this stuff, this is just par for the course. 06:35 Also expect to have interference with your work from your meditation habit. You're going to be meditating and meditating and then all of a sudden you realize "my work, my career, it's so meaningless. Why am I putting all this effort and all this emotional labor into it?" and so you might want to quit your career or you might get disgusted by it or whatever, that's totally normal and usually that comes and it passes so the trick with all these things is to not get triggered by them and then to make some sort of rash move as a reaction against just this negative emotional energy or this fear or self-doubt that's bubbling up from inside of you. 07:28 What meditation is doing is surfacing stuff from your deep subconscious mind and that stuff comes up to the surface but if you don't expect that then that's when you can get into trouble because you will then react against that stuff which is largely illusory, but then you reacting to it can cause some real damage in your life. 07:50 Also expect interference with relationships especially your closest intimate relationship with your spouse or your girlfriend or boyfriend and also your family relationships. You might feel like "oh what am I doing in this relationship? Why am I even married to this person? We're such a wrong match", and you're going to get all this kind of self-doubt going. That's totally normal. Expect some rash judgments, you might feel like "oh okay I gotta quit my job and I've got to get a divorce. I've gotta drop my family and my children and move to a cave in India" . You might have some sort of fantasy like that come into your mind while you're meditating and then you think "okay that's what I've got to do now" and then you go and actually do it, and the mistake is to act on that too quickly without letting that plan or this fantasy just kind of like work its way through you. Usually what'll happen is it'll pass in a few days so be aware of that. 08:53 And other kinds of rash judgments. You might have a rash judgment to sell your IRA and to liquidate all your stocks and all your assets and to donate all that money to charity and then if you act on that too quickly you might come to regret that. 09:11 Also expect suicidal thoughts. I can almost guarantee that if you are meditating effectively you will have more suicidal thoughts than you've probably ever had in your life and that's if you're a normal person. I'm not talking about suicidal people, I'm talking about totally normal people. Me from my meditation habit I never have really suicidal thoughts but from my meditation habit alone, the more I meditate the more suicidal thoughts I have, and that's totally fine. I recognize that. I don't take them very seriously and therefore they don't bother me but someone who's not expecting that could get freaked out by that and could actually maybe think that they're going to take action on it which could become a problem. 10:00 Expect some freak out moments. Some days you just start to freak out and you're not even sure why. You get into an argument with your spouse or your children for no good reason. You're just blaming them for stuff or you're agitated at them. You're snapping at them, you're being passive-aggressive, this sort of stuff. 10:17 Expect ego backlash. This will surely happen to you at one point or another and it'll happen many times and what I mean by ego backlash is that as you're meditating, you're dissolving your ego over time, that's basically what you're doing. But when the ego gets dissolved too much too fast, it tends to come back with even more force than it had before and starts to really behave in nasty petty egotistical ways which is exactly why you might start to get into arguments with people that otherwise you shouldn't have gotten into. 11:05 You might turn back to old habits that you've worked through already like you might go binging on ice cream and on greasy food even though you've already cleaned up your diet. You might go binge on television even though you've stopped watching television for years. You might go start doing drugs again or alcohol or smoking cigarettes even though you haven't done that for years. You might go on a sex binge and go sleep with a bunch of random strangers on one-night stands even though you don't usually do that. You might get addicted to money again. Maybe you've weaned yourself off the pursuit of money and the pursuit of success in business and then you've been meditating a lot and all of a sudden it's like "oh my business, I got to get back to my business, I gotta earn more money" and then you'll go and start chasing that again, so this is all stuff that I call ego backlash. And this can feel demoralizing because it feels like you're taking a step backwards because here you are meditating for years and now you're eating junk food, doing drugs and chasing money again. Like "what's this about? I thought I was supposed to be growing and becoming more spiritual and it seems like I'm just regressing?" but that's just a phase , that's something you have to work through and go further and what I've noticed is that every time I have a strong ego backlash if I am mindful and vigilant of it and just kind of avoid the most negative behaviors, try to limit the most negative behaviors possible with that backlash and just kind of monitor it then usually within a couple of weeks it dissolves and then I'm back better than ever. 12:51 So with all these things you have to understand that these are temporary and when we're told that meditation makes us more spiritual, makes us more aware, dissolves our ego and all this other good stuff, makes us calmer and happier that's true but only in the long run is that true. That's not true in the short run that's where people really go wrong is that they assume it is just going to be straighforward positive linear progression from the moment they start meditating and that's just completely unrealistic 13:27 Expect hyper horniness, sometimes you can be meditating and maybe you've got off porn and you stop having frivolous sex and then you just have this spell of incredible horniness and you want to like jerk off every day or you want to go have sex with a bunch of people and it's like you can't get it out of your system, it's just like you feel like this horniness coursing through you. 13:57 Expect old repressed memories to come bubbling up, stuff that you have completely forgotten about, stuff you might think you've worked through. It's gonna be some traumatic stuff especially if you had traumas in your childhood, stuff that you've repressed, stuff that was very negative, maybe examples like abuse, sexual abuse, any kind, like near-death experiences that you've had, bullying, humiliation, embarrassment, all this kind of stuff that you would normally not want to think about, that will come bubbling up, also family stuff will come bubbling up because many of your memories, the earliest memories, you have are of your childhood and especially if you had a turbulent childhood which wasn't all rainbows and butterflies then definitely expect that stuff to come up and definitely expect all sorts of family issues like mommy issues, daddy issues, sibling rivalries, resentments, all that kind of stuff. 15:07 Expect crazy monkey mind, expect sometimes to have waves of insanity and madness wash over you where you just feel like your mind is like a swarming hive of bees and the more you try to control it the more out-of-control it gets and you just sit down you try to meditate, you try to do your normal technique, and nothing is working none of your normal techniques of working expect self-doubt where you start to doubt yourself, you start to doubt your technique, like this technique has been working for months and now it just feels like "oh man this technique it's stopped working it's not working anymore". 15:57 Expect nightmares, weird dreams where in your dreams you're living out weird fantasies like having sex with your mother or killing people or butchering your dog with a cleaver or something like that, you know unpleasant images in your mind when you're sleeping. to be continued/...it gets worse ... **********

He uses his name together with dramatic headlines as click bait, true tabloid style. "Alien Bible Found! They worship Oprah!"

Isn't it still true even if it's not understood? If math is only relevant to human logic, than how else would an alien go about calculating something to build a spacecraft persay? I'm just having trouble wrapping my head around this.

this is an alien movie reference

@remember I think it was Alien movie reference.

@Anna1 hahaha yep. Or they will say climate change is a fabrication. Or the moon landing never happened. The one making the rounds on the internet now is that Jeffrey Epstein is not dead. They should all be wearing a tin foil hat to protect themselves from radioactive waves coming out of alien spaceships. Or they might get MK ultra programmed by their governments.

Last year in january I engaged on a ayahuasca trip with a shaman who hosted free ayahuasca sessions at his home. The trip was quite hard, it consisted mostly of energetic suffering but after a certain point, redemption was attained, the trip became consistent with visions and insights and divine states of being. That shaman, wanted me to become an ayahuasca shaman as well, he gifted me with the necessary plant material to brew my own ayahuasca and he gifted 2 small bottles with ready-to-use ayahuasca enough for one extra as soon as I got home. As soon as I got home I was indeed quite excited to have one more trip of ayahuasca, it felt like I was on the tip of the divine, the edge of divine and sacred realms, I could go there and perhaps finally find the energy to open up my heart to cure my social anxiety which is at the root of my depression and empty-feeling life. I toke a normal dose, and because I had only just done an ayahuasca trip I worried that it wouldn't be enough, that I'd be too tolerant to the effects, I somehow compared mushrooms to ayahuasca, I was foolish, I knew that my past experiences with dmt proved that it was the opposite the more you do the less tolerant you get. In another way I felt brave, so I toke a normal dose and a half, 1.5 dosage The trip was the most horrible and difficult trip and difficult moment of my entire life,I couldn't have ever imagined that life could feel this vividly bad, I landed in pure hell, I was on the edge of killing myself save for having managed to call 2 friends in the middle of the night to come pick me up before I jumped into the city canal to end it all. During the trip I finally understood that one horror story, about that one guy in England or America who did drugs and ended up tripping so bad he ended up attacking his own girlfriend and eating her face up. I could comprehend how one could be so pushed so far, how volatile and organic madness could push one so far, in that moment I felt sad for that guy but the psychological hell of feeling like I'm drawing dangerously close to being able to do the same thing had me heading straight to the canal to kill myself. I had discovered my greatest fear and hell, it is not talking to girls, nor getting hurt physically, it is ending hurting someone else badly despite my own will. It was a matter of saving other people at that point of the trip. And that was only 3 hours into the trip, luckily my friends came over to pick me up, they were 2 strong lads and I could focus on making it through the trip without worrying that I'd end up hurting anyone, my physical body was in safe hands. I tripped the whole night hellishly, and the next day the trip continued with moderate to severe intensity till the end of the day. My advice for those who do ayahuasca, do it in daylight, you have more energy, both physically and mentally,especially in case the trip is hard, do it with multiple friends, so that you don't have to worry about your physical body, in the case that you lose absolute control you want morr then one person to be able to handle your physical body at its unconscious superstrength. It may not seem obvious at first, but its there in the back of your mind, you cannot let go fully if no one sober and trusted is watching your physical body. After that day my life changed forever, constant visual and energetic waves of tripping, in retrospect I've been tripping everyday for the past months. In variation to my activities, states of being, thoughts, meditation, perhaps this is enlightenment but I haven't really read in this forum or anywhere about people who encounter daily changes on the level of a moderate lsd experience everyday. Somewhere it feels my enlightemment is guiding me through this madness which really feels like one long non-stop ayahuasca trip, for the past months I had to quit about 3 jobs because I couldn't hold them down like this. I had to be mindless as much as possible most of the time, my own thoughts would send me tripping into bad places, only recently has it improved and I have effectively recuperated my mind. The city which used to change every few days visually is changing at a slower pace now. It is still impossible for me to be out at night, any activities being out at night in this city that I live in, friends or not, once its night time I lose all my energy, and if I push it I'm left with a depression that sends me on the borders of suicide. Night-time is deadly for me at this point I had social anxiety before, now I had periods where anxiety flared so much it was pure hell going to the supermarket doing groceries, passing by people on the streets I had to literally sometimes brace my abs so that I would not be swayed too much by the anxious event of a passing by someone that is walking in opposite direction of me, just to brace my own body, to keep control of my own walk, as if a train passed me by. Feeling people's emotions a thousand fold, great anger and a wide array of emotions let me get over my anxiety, which is good, except now I seem outlandishly confident, even alien and now it seems everywhere I go people notice me, but even worse some people fear me, or are intimidated. I know that I intimidate no one who's intentions are with love, these good souls don't fear me, throughout this ordeal I seem to be in harmony with life. I seem to be employed lately as a merciless reflection, a punisher of some sorts. Anyone with an ego, who thinks they are stronger then others, who measures others powers, when they meet me and measure my power they meet their own aggression right back at them pure and unfiltered. I know not what these people feel when they see me and try to measure me but I know it is now they who wobble when I pass them by, who can barely walk straight anymore,it is they who fear People start racing me by on the streets or weirdly almost charging at me, changing seats in public transport, trying to keep an eye on me, grown men, grown women, everyone with an ego gets it. And I would feel guilty, making people fear in the city, literally sweating in fear,I saw one guy and he looked like he thought I was about to murder him. I never wanted this I felt like a monster at times..but then I noticed the only people getting scared are the snobs, the intimidating tough guy type, the women and men with ego, who think they're somehow better then everyone else. Somewhere I feel it is people like them with selfish hearts who get on on having an advantage over others who have made it so hard for sensible timid souls like me to live on this earth. I never thought my light work would amount to this, breaking ego's of snobs and intimidators and judgers Well somewhere it feels good, like justice being delivered, these people only meet the violence and aggression that they project onto others. To measure someone' elses power is aggression, defense is offense, offense is defense Those who focus on being stronger then others, will meet the reflections thats coming to them That is how my enlightenment has evolved in an urban setting, hopefully my ayahuasca trip will slow down more and more till I can have a normal life again What has maintained my sanity through these months is no doubt the belief in love, life has let it presence and love be felt many times, for that I'm grateful

@Keyhole Sorry, I have no idea, never heard of them. The Elohim look like us in their physical form, as we were made in their image, except they're much taller and stronger. Some of them are depicted holding a full-grown male lion like a kittycat. Inanna used to lead a lion along on a leash. There are many different life forms all over the universe and even within the same space we share, existing parallel to our own reality. Your description sounds a bit like Queen Nefertiti, if you do an image search on her. She had an elongated skull, dark skin, and high cheekbones. I think it is likely that she was descended from one of these alien / god races.

Yeah I left my body on lsd and when it happened the only thing that was left was like an ocean of conciseness. The most peaceful place I know but its very hard for me to describe it. So yes I think you can go to the spirit realm/after life or whatever with lsd. But its still very different to a dmt breaktrough at least for me.. when I breaktrough on dmt everything is so fast, colourful and alien. Also I still know who I am and have kind of normal thoughts. I remember thinking "this is beautiful but everything is so fast" all the time. when I breaktrough with lsd its so different, because there is nothing from the "I" left it just is. I really dont yet have the words to talk about it, but it is kind of slowed down compared to dmt and there are no entities in this place or so. also I heared from people they have full ego-dissolution everytime they do n,n-dmt, they told me you just need to smoke a lot.

@lmfao You can check out this video I find very interesting on this topic. Though if you're not an Indian, or know about the food culture here, a lot of it might sound alien.

I'm almost finished reading/listening to the "I am Rah" book/audio. Just curious on opinions on the subject. The writers supposedly communicated, via, "channeling", with an alien being. "RAH". who gave them (us) the low-down on the ultimate wisdom download, so to speak. Apologizes if this is "inappropriate", but I read the rules and I am in no way affiliated or promoting the subject matter. Just Curios. : )

@ivankiss I get occasional downloads. My downloads are usually more centered around what I'm doing in my life the most at a given time. For now that's painting so I get visions of certain color pallets interacting amongst itself with specific flowing motions. This happens most often before I fall asleep. My issue with the music downloads is that they literally fade from memory as quickly as I can get up and even figure out what it was that was going on rhythmically and melodically. Maybe I need to improve on music theory so that I have a template for what is actually happening and I can more easily get those ideas down before they fade so quickly. Times I have tried in the past fail miserably. I have gotten into meditative states where I am able to compose music in real time in my head that is so alien and avante garde that I fail to understand how its happening. The more I try to break down whats happening the more the music starts to disappear. I have to kinda not care and not judge the composition for it to continue happening. Weird how that works. I'm also very slow in tableture programs like guitar pro so that doesn't help. Yeah, I'd love links to that. I Have had my 8 string a couple years and really all I do with it is try and play meshuggah songs and cover my favorite snippets in Audacity. I'm still learning how to record, shape tones on my amp and edit within DAW. I struggle with Eq'ing with balance. I also just started to understand the anatomic mechanics of how to scream/growl maybe a year and a half ago so I try to mix my vocals with my guitar playing and its a damn mess XD. That as far as I have gotten with playing and producing

@Elham I’d consider what is the comfort factor which exists in the fantasy, but is believed not to be available in ‘real life’. Unless it’s an alien or something, without the resistance to it, you’ll experience it. Maybe even if it was an alien. The limitation of your wanting & belief you can have it, is yours, not a partners. Have you communicated what you are wanting to your / a partner?

Pitfalls on the Path This is a summary of some obsticals we might encounter on our journey toward supreme consciousness. We are each a spectrum of various degrees of the pitfalls that make up our shadow side. The shadow playing into the light and the light playing into the shadow. Love-consciousness would be the light side that is half of who we are, would it not? The darkside would be the recalcitrant neglect of cues from body-mind-soul-muse regarding the appropriate care and love-consciousness for self or other. Shadow is perhaps the separate-self-sense's blind concern and focus on that which stops the heart from expanding to infinity. Kundalini and our beliefs about God and spirituality are not important. What is of ultimate value to us is Life, love and relationship. If our kundalini and our beliefs are interfering with our Life, love and relationship then we must do everything within our power of awareness to rectify this situation. 1-Pathological Regression Retreat into infantile prerational uroboric fusion. Indulgence in dissolution and fragmentation; often due to lack of modeling, support, structure or clearly defined developmental framework of ascent that covers all sides of the whole human (survival, somatic, emotional, social, spiritual). Desire to let ones life collapse in the hope of being rescued. Retreat into depression and grief to escape more expansive perception and profound sense of being 2-Running Away Retreat and evasion through dissociation and denial. Inertial holding back to former modes of perception and being. Effort to pull energy down, back and in through substance addictions, heavy food, sedentary lifestyle and through avoidance of "opening" practices and therapy. Secondary fear chemistry due to negative interpretation of kundalini events resulting in panic, paralysis, stagnation, isolation and avoidance. Even running away from bliss and increased wellbeing with various forms of anaesthetization, self-repression and self-destruction. 3-Oblivion Bliss obsession is a preoccupation and addiction to blissful energy, using it as a form of narcotic anaesthetization to avoid real world obligations, survival and development imperatives. Hazy, diffuse, forgetful, preoccupied, heedlessness, day dreaming, castle building, directionless. Lost in fantasy, trance, myth, symbol, story, meaning making, synchronicities and connections. Creativity at the expense of survival, through avoidance of rational discernment. 4-Diffusion Loss of left-brain focusing and hierarchical prioritization. Chain of Being collapsed. Codependency, dependency, false security in catering to the egos of others, coupled with lower-order giving through forms of slavery whereby ones highest contribution is lost in obscurantism, confusion, ambiguity, paradox, double-binds due to the collapse of the hierarchical prioritizing faculty. Indistinct, labyrinthine, vague, leaky boundaries, jumbled, enigmatic. 5-Fixation on Internal Processes Overly fascinated, morbidly curious, distracted by and absorbed in kundalini symptoms, psychic phenomena and newfound spiritual powers (siddhas). This compulsive obsession with symptoms and phenomena feeds inflation and interferes with relationships and functional utility. Possible secondary fear or depression over the temporary loss of adaptive functions and left-brain sharpness. Inability to disembed to perceive emotional storms as psychosomatic events of alchemical cycles. Excessive reactivity to conditions both internal and external. 6-Chasing the Dragon Blindly engaging in practices, stimulants, relationships and events with the aim of rapidly increasing the intensity and speed of the trajectory of kundalini opening. Thereby increasing the danger of more extreme peaks and valleys, which could result in tissue damage, depression, regression and burnout. Self destructive use of the alchemy for thrills, novelty and status. 7-Inflation Expanded psychic ability, high energy and siddhas inflate the ego to feel overly special, superior and unique. This feeds into the separate-self-sense's illusion of an independent existence and promotes selfishness or "my enlightenment for me." World savior, grand mission, martyr, new religions, global ideas, evangelical crusade. Visionary over-estimation of reality and potential, generating the propensity to forcibly impose ones will on the world. 8-Internal Exploitation Turning the sacred into the profane. Lack of integration between the levels, coupled with disillusionment about achieving "higher goals." Hence exploitation of sex/kundalini/muse energy for "worldly goals" of power, status or monetary gain. "Using" oneself is an introverted symptom of inflation. The more we exploit ourselves the more others exploit us. Treating ourselves as a resource without regard for our spiritual welfare. 9-External Exploitation Using powerful psychic and siddha powers to exploit others in order to fulfill ones own drive for power, status or monetary gain. Lust, usurpation, manipulation, dominator-hierarchies. Power mongering is an extraverted symptom of inflation. The more we exploit others, the more we exploit ourselves through turning the sacred into the profane. Treating others as a resource without regard for their spiritual welfare. 10-Projecting Spirit Transference onto Gurus, lovers, alien or channeled entities, angels, saints etc...in disownership of ones own alchemical process, soul and muse. Feels like a powerful force enacting on us from outside, sometimes seeming too great for mortal endurance. Externalization of internal archetypal aspects (Great Attractors) ultimately resulting in our reclaiming them as our own through the pain generated by the projection. 11-Formalism Entrenched preoccupation with appearances, rules, forms, formulas, dogmas, details, rituals and traditions of religious sects. Fanaticism, orthodoxy, fundamentalism, letter of the word, conservatism, conventional, spiritual materialism, elitism/exclusion, need to "belong." Feeds into power, pride and defense systems of the psyche. 12-Perpetual Seeker Looking for wholeness and Self outside oneself. Fragmentation due to lack of coherent integration, individuation and boundary definition. Spirit always over the horizon, without serious intention of achieving Self, due to resistance to sovereignty and autonomous choice. Tendency toward projecting Spirit and formalism. Need for parental figures as there is an unconscious commitment to remain immature, obsequious and surrender ones personal power. Bottom dog trying to gain power through connection to a Guru or power figure. 13-Addiction to Cognition Inability to relax into the spaciousness of the transrational due to tenacious drive of the mind to "know." Unwilling to let go of focal, associative, analytic mind in order to transcend and include it in "whole-seeing" and full spectrum consciousness. Resistance to relinquishing the myopia of the representational mind and thus avoid uniting the relative will with the Absolute Will; perhaps due to lack to lack of faith or knowledge that there is anything higher than intellect. 14-Absolute Knowledge Loss of growth potential by closing off to new information due to the hubris of a premature claim to enlightenment. Rigidified bubble of the known as a defense against chaos, dynamism, dissolution and breakdown--thereby preventing resurrection to a higher order. Bombastic grandiose omniscience. Cults, obdurate, implacable, inflexible, rigid, unshakable, stagnant. Arrogance, self-righteousness, self-justification, vanity, pride, top of the heap. Forgets beginners mind due to inflation hence is ignorant of ones ignorance. 15-Spiritual Bypass "Premature transcendence--high level denial. Avoiding painful psychological issues by immersing oneself in a rigorous spiritual practice, or focusing on experiences of transcendence within the Kundalini phenomena to the exclusion of processing trauma from the past." - Michael Dubois 16-Abiding in the Absolute "Holding the absolute dimension so tightly that we can't see all the relative learning that we still have to do. Trivializing the sense of relative impermanence amidst the artificial perfection of what can seem like a permanent awakening." - Michael Dubois 17-Blinded by Clarity "When inner Vision and Intent become so clarified and overpowering, that the clarity itself fixates attention on a limited range of perceptions/interpretations/possibilities. Polishing the interpretive lens so thoroughly, that the lens itself becomes invisible as an object of perception." - Michael Dubois 18-Cosmic Paradox Religious forms kill the human spirit or stop it evolving, because religions, churches and ashrams are attempts to legitimize that which needs no legitimization (I am That). And in so doing, a defense against illegitimacy (evil) is set up, which perpetuates evil (self/other separation). Rather, what needs to occur is education in inclusivity, global embrace, We-thinking and the observation that the ego will always try and separate and elevate itself above the crowd in an attempt to acquire legitimacy (good), power and significance. From: http://biologyofkundalini.com/article.php@story=PitfallsonthePath.html

Here is a question: What is there to want other than consciousness, this, and/or an alien banana peel (etc.)? I cannot find want, but there is a force that drives this. And so I conclude that I must align with whatever is true. My question is, why would you do anything else? - I have so many objections: I am deluded (probably true), I do not deserve it as I have not done enough work to subscribe to any insight; all insights are illegitimate because of this, I am not psychologically ready nor physically ready, I have do not have any success so I will constantly be faced with the pressure of leaching on society as opposed to pulling my own weight. (I am working on all these things at the moment) - Perhaps I'm talking shit. And I assume I am in dangerous waters as I came to this conclusion in my notebook and not looking at my hand, but then again I do look at my notebook.

Hello. I'll start by saying this: DEATH IS A REAL THING WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT. Why am I saying this? I'm saying this because life is temporary. I'm not denying that after death remains nothing or darkness or a state of dreamless sleep or (a) void or even emptiness. After death, there might be something like consciousness. I don't deny it. Death means the dissolving of your body, your character or the disappearance of life as you know it. A lot of people don't like the concept of death because they resent the fact that life is temporary. Even in my case, I don't like the fact that life is temporary. Let me tell you why. The reality we live in is extraordinary. Life comes with an amazing structure. Noting is more beautiful than life. Not even the consciousness itself. Not even the entire universe. Because consciousness and the Univers itself are impersonal. Consciousness is not comparable to the human mind; the human mind is something unique; it's something much more beautiful than anything else. Why do you think that there is a human mind? Why do you think that the human mind is as it is? Because the human mind has found its way out of everything else... and that's the beauty of it. Our minds are unique and foreign to consciousness. They are not from this realm. Let me state it a little bit different. Our minds are alien to anything that consciousness produces because the mind is not a product of consciousness. This is not a delusion or merely just thoughts. It is something that has to be discovered by yourself. The only thing foreign or alien to everything that exists in consciousness is the human mind. Nothing can be more beautiful than the human mind.

@Pharion There are studies on animals being given psychadelics or drugs. Most notable is when an octopus was given MDMA, despite being one of the most "alien" creature on this planet, it reacted very similarly to humans: https://www.theguardian.com/science/2018/sep/20/mdma-makes-octopuses-more-sociable Dolphins for example can recognize themselves in the mirror, and as teenagers will voluntarely take psychadelic plants to get high. There are various ways to experience God at a meta level. Take different psychedelics and you'll see. A lot of aliens, animals and AIs will be able to experience spirituality in different w This would be true if "exponential" growth was taken out of equation. Exactly 100 years ago the world's best scientists were saying we won't fly into space in a very long time (if ever) only to be proven wrong a few decades later. World's best AI scientists just a decade ago were doubting we'll create an AI which'll be able to beat someone in a game of Go (which requires creative/intuitive, non-brute force thinking) and yet we already did that. History has proven time and time again, that even the best guys in any field are very bad at predicting future advancements, let alone someone like Leo who obviously is not a proffesional in AI.

It all comes down to how much you resist the truth. I personally dwelled in the dark my whole life so when i had a spiritual awakening it was the most amazing thing to ever happen to me and i recognized fully that this is my true form, my true state, my natural state so i transitioned smoothly because it was completely home to me, familiar on all levels, nothing alien about it, so there was minimal resistance in the process. Of course challenges can occur afterwards if you lose your way and drift off the path but it can easily be restored once again.

I am aware of that statement and that you are aware of what I speak of in terms of how things are. Our disagreement is in the framing, the usage of language to communicate this understanding. I don't subscribe to the idea that all frameworks are equally valid or useful for us, especially in terms of our existential investigations. In my eyes the materialist paradigms and their resulting "non-materialist"-paradigms (which stand in opposition to the materialist paradigm and are essentially a spawn of it, and therefore attached to it like a tick) are very unnecessarily vague, confusing and conflating because all of them stemmed from a deeper unconsciousness. Once the consciousness increase these frameworks have been kind of made to work from within that consciousness level. I would prefer for us to actually construct a cleaner framework that is specifically detached from the limited materialistic framework and does not require to stand in opposition of it, but rather is it's own evolutionary pathway of frameworks. Whether we like it or not but these frameworks have an impact on our consciousness and how we view the things we are talking about. Instead of having a framework that works against the essential nature of Oneness, Non-duality and so forth we can construct them in ways so they streamline these aspects. Things like "Perception, Mind, Relativity" always stand in contrast to the Materialistic Framework. They are essentially part of it, and in my eyes it is obvious that the usages of these concepts will keep as trapped, to a certain degree, in that paradigm. Basically what I am trying to say is that due to our unconsciousness in the past we have created entire languages and concepts based on that level of consciousness. When we are using that same language on a different level of consciousness we will naturally come to the limitations of that language and these concepts, which is happening all the time. And this is not mere surface level, this goes really, really deep. I don't see a lot of people adressing this problem while to me it seems like it has helped me increase my consciousness quite significantly. Think of if a high consciousness alien was to construct a language, what words would it never even come up with that we keep using all day. How would it refer to different kind of objects when objects themselves are part of the language framework and therefore more of conceptual clumps than anything else? There are a lot of things that would look completely differently. To me Leo and a lot of people when using language and attempting to communicate non-dual Truth are banging their heads against the wall. While of course this is obviously inevitable to a certain degree, I do think we could make it far more comprehensive if we were to adjust our language significantly.

Hello. I need some help as I currently find myself in a confusing place. For my entire life I have been living within the realm of the mind. I have been completely unaware of my power as in infinite creator on this Earth. And now that I have come into understanding of this power in the past year and more so in the last two months I find myself at a point of transformation and transition. You see a few months ago I quit my job. This was one of the best decisions that I could have made for myself, mentally, physically and spiritually. It was an OK job by society’s standards but it heavily damaged my soul and for the three years I worked there my life was in a very dark place. I have enjoyed the past few months and they have been the best time of my life so far. I have grown immensely in a short time. However my monetary funds are beginning to lessen and this has created an anxiety in me. My true passion in life is the study of spirituality, ecology and human development and I am writing a book on the subject of Ecopsychology. However this is a huge endeavor and while I have made great progress on the book every cell in my body feels called to place all of my energy towards the completion and publication of my book. However when I look at my external reality I do indeed feel an air of anxiety when it comes to how I will do this. Every cell in my body is telling me to not go back to getting a traditional job. And yet over the last month there is one job offer that is continually appearing in my life and I have no desire to accept this job. I do wonder if this job offer continually appearing in my experience is a test of faith and or an external manifestation of my fear. Whenever I think of working this job I do not see light in my minds eye, only darkness and subsequent pain. I guess what I am trying to ask is, how do I know if something is truly for me or not for me if it keeps appearing in my life? I am very keen on making good decisions and am quite a decisive person so this level of confusion within me is unsettling. I am going to meditate on this as I have a feeling that my intuition is telling me to not regress back into old fear based ways of thinking and perceiving reality and thus that it would be in my best interest to follow the path I feel guided towards even though I cannot see the steps. I have never had this much faith before, this is new alien territory for me but I know that I cannot go back. Again the thing I am struggling with is the discerning whether the reoccurring job offer is a temptation, a test of faith to see if I will fall back to my old ways or if I will truly transcend my fears and go towards a new version of myself and access a new level of my life? All I know for certain right now is that I have to trust the process 100% even though I cannot see ahead and have a knowing that the universe has my best interests at hand and truly does want the best for my unfolding life in this realm.

Leo sometimes talks about rebirth and how you never die once you become the “God Head” when you die you will get bored and create yourself again so what is it cuz he never talks about this topic clearly I value his opinion and curious to know what he says. Will you be self conscious when you die?, Like will you be like ohhh I’m dead lol or you just rebirth right away into some 8 legged alien and your memory is reset.?

@Inliytened1 @Serotoninluv Thw funny thing is, the more present I become, the more everything look so alien and surreal. How can verbal answers even capture these! It's just my mind wanting verbal answers which it can't really get. But what happens when a hammer hits my face and crushes my skull? Why is there something being thretened? What is being lost?

Alien chicks be lookin hella thicc when you're weeks into nofap

This is my solo retreat report. I hope it will inspire you to do something like this yourself. Over a month ago I started my 4 week solo retreat. I was quite ready for this. I rented a tiny cabin with no electricity, no water. Spartan conditions, but it was extremely cheap and all I could afford. It was not easy. I quickly found myself in an ocean of suffering and bliss. These two would swap back and forth, varying in intensity and duration. It didn't take me long to realize that the greater the challenge I faced, the more profound the insight at the end and the stronger the bliss following it. This kept me going through the hellish phases. Just a day or two in, I realized that no meditation technique would do. I was not in charge. All I could do was be quiet and watch as life expressed itself through me by spontaneously contemplating the right questions, than inspecting the body, then forgetting all and surrendering completely, then other activities still. I think it was day 3 when the kundalini stuff started to happen. Good thing I heard about all this many times. If I didn't, I'd probably go crazy. In my meditations unspeakable stuff was happening in my body, visions more real than reality would come to mind and I had problems discerning what was true and what was false. Many times my body got so blocked up I thought I would die, only to be forced into an even deeper surrender. Nights were no relief either. Lucid dreams full of trials and challenges awaited me. Alien abductions and meeting gurus, sages and stuff like that. In short, it was a hell of a ride. Fortunately, after about 3 days this subsided. Deep contemplations started to take place uncovering old traumas, unmet desires and such. It was beautiful. On day 14 I had the biggest insight of the retreat. I was contemplating Consciousness itself, when I realized that it is no different from Love. Than I remembered the Hindu concept of Sat-Chit-Ananda (Being-Consciusness-Love), looked closer, and sure enough, this Consciousness-Love was not different from Being either - meaning me. I bathed in this unbounded state for a couple of hours looking over a beautiful pond nearby. I came to the conclusion that I was done here, after 2 week out of 4. It has been 16 days since I came home now. A lot has changed, and nothing at all. I am clearer than ever about what I want, need and value. My life has a much deeper sense of purpose and authenticity. My contemplation skill just sky rocketed. I realized what contemplation is, and it is such a joy to do it even hours a day, as I now know that I can go all the way to the truth of anything I want to know. And since I believe, I make it happen. I have had issues with eating for a long time, even though my diet was good. A lot of shame and guilt always plagued this arena of my life. After a particularly bad meal on the retreat and a deep introspection afterwards, I asked desperately - "How the fuck do I solve this?". And the answer came - "Just ask.". I realized the ability to ask about any food and I will get an answer from inside - it tells me if I should or shouldn't eat. Quickly I realized this works for any question with yes and no. I can ask about anything and know if it is 'yes' or 'no', but it's not always easy to ask and follow the answer. This often takes balls and and losing a fat piece of ego is common here. Soooo... go do it. Spend time alone. Forget it all. Immerse yourself in yourself. You won't believe how much bullshit you are buying into. Thank you Leo, you were one of the ones who inspired me to do this!

Preface: This was the first proper trip after my last one which was preceeded by a panic attack and subsequent ego death. I was not entirely sure if I was ready for another round however I felt really good this morning and decided to go in again. The Come Up: Just like last trip the body panicked upon intake of the tea. However this time I was able to stay completely calm. The heart and stomach were beating, yet the mind was calm and clear. And after a couple of minutes the body panic stopped and the trip started. The trip: After the heart beat returned to normal there was a simple sentence that came to me: "Remember, the Darkness is the Light". And as it turned out this should be theme of the trip. The Darkness The trip started of dark. Really dark. Mushrooms can be like that. Someone once wrote here that it's kinda like being dropped of on a random planet. Pretty accurate I would say. Well this planet was at war. I had a vision of someone being tortured. Me being the one leading the interrogation and the one taking the pain. I had vision of a couple young boys having a fight and beating the living shit out of each other. I had a vision of an Asian genocide happening before my eyes. Lastly I had a vision of some violent alien race pillaging the galaxy... led by some sort of hive mind. Note, I include this to be accurate. I don't know if there is any truth to that whatsoever. Yet it kinda felt like a warning. The Shadow After all that darkness I decided to take a little break. Once I came back from taking a piss I lied back down and the darkness revealed itself as the shadow. The male shadow to be exact. The male shadow is anger. And, very interestingly the female shadow is deception. I have not studied shadow work yet, however this is my direct experience. Both energies seemed to be wounded deeply and I had visions of both being acted out by people I know. Then I was also shown how to be a man. Being a man entails dealing with that shadow and shining a light on it (note that everyone has both male and female energy). And very interestingly it includes homosexuality. I have one gay friend however I noticed that I have a bit of a resistance towards being gay. That resistance was surrendered. This side of me which was resistant was able to be re-integrated. I still like women last time I checked but I feel more whole as man. The Light After all of that the Light came. I still had some violent visions however this time it was different. There was a light shining through. There was a particular scene I remember. The light merged with the darkness becoming pure light setting the scene in stone. I remembered that all that darkness is Love. It is light. It is Goodness. Love (with a capital "L") includes all of it. It is it. It is the darkness and the shadow. That is what pure Love entails. And why all the darkness? Out of Love. The Voice I still wanted to break through to God and tried to surrendered further. Then, for the first time I was able to see existence as a projection. It's a hologram. It has no substance. What we call life is a projection onto the screen of consciousness. The body is a thought and has no absolute essence. The mind is illusory and has no absolute essence. My birth is a story. I am a story. What I call "me" is a character in a game called life. It has no essence. What is left then? Isness. Pure self aware Isness. Why is there a voice inside of my head? Most of the breakthroughs I had were kind of narrated by the voice in my head (until the event horizon was passed so to speak). This time I could see how the voice lost itself. It still narrated but it lost itself in a sort of echo chamber of God. It too had no essence of itself. I, as God was talking to myself. There were no bells, whistles of ecstasy this time. It also wasn't a complete breakthrough. More of merging in and out of Nonduality. That's it. Short and sweet. Most important (for me at least) was to be able to face the fear and jump into the deep end again. There is still work to do. Don't know when I will trip again though. Have a good one! Much love