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  2. Leo had touched on the idea that the Ego can be very distracting when it comes to meditation in that if a person becomes entranced with the motivation to meditate, then the Ego is threatened for fear of falling apart --- as it does when practicing meditation and self-actualization on the path to enlightenment. Yup ... I've felt my Ego get in my way and it's disturbing. I LOVED meditating and truly felt like it was getting me somewhere. But once I felt this eager to dedicate my life to this work, a strange thing happened. I would plan on meditating or think of doing it in the moment ... but then, I wouldn't. WHY??? How could I truly want to practice and not have any reasons to hold me back from doing it ... and yet, I don't do it. Do I not want to do it as badly as I think I do? This goes for my studying, too. I LOVE my major and dream of practicing it professionally ... and yet, lately ... I'm cramming for tests jus to get a low B. *sigh* I don't understand why I jus feel so frozen.
  3. @Michael569 Weird I always get increase of acne due hot showers.
  4. I feel it would be very hard to distinguish who is who. "Is it the OP replying to my post or some troll pretending to be the OP?"
  5. @Whywolf Thanks for yet another in depth response. When I feel like my brain is working properly, I'll read through all the stuff you have written again, and see what stuff I feel will help me. I've started to see this "mentor" and they work with people with aspergers as well, so I'll ask more about it next time and see what kind of assistance I need, because I'm not exactly sure.
  6. Today
  7. Also I humbly apologize. I see that I have been troubling this place way too much, and I now pledge to stop it. Yesterday I finally created my very first youtube video ever, which was a very exiting step, and now I will work hard on creating and expanding my channel and my content (and my business in general). I shall leave this place and let you all finally rest in peace. I won't tell my channel here, but if you ever run upon the best video ever and you strangly resonate and feel that it is me, give it a like to support me. Thanks for enduring me so long on this forum, and cheers.
  8. Excerpt from the book 'Levels of Energy' by Frederick E. Dodson
  9. @carlos flores @Snick @Prabhaker I do not know if you have seen those, but you might be interested in those documentaries about the tibetan tradition of yogis The second video is an excerpt from the documentary : "The message of the tibetans" by Arnaud Desjardins Found them quite insightful and inspiring
  10. Of course, you can't (or better shouldn't) hide it deep down like I do with all my issues...this creates only more issues. Embrace it, face it, love your shadow side. Then it actually will get better.
  11. The universe has its natural flow. When you align yourself with that flow you will spot these obvious things. Outside of the flow people refer to it as miracles, coincidences, answer on a prayer from god, higher beings etc. doesn't really matter what you call it. When you are in this flow (out of ego mode), you see these connections, you are living your life from them because they show you what to do or what you you did was right. You are of course the universe. It is just consciousness. You are tapping in to that flow. Nothing can go wrong when you are there. Had tons of these numbers, very recently as well and it had significant meaning to EXACTLY the type of thing I was doing. So, this is no bullshit at all. But whether its angels, demons or God, doesn't matter. It is very real
  12. @Principium Nexus no necessarily. Hot shower induces toxic release. Your body gets rid of chemical and heavy metal poisoning. Same with infrared saunas or sweating during vigorous cardio excercise. Acne are mainly caused by wrong diet.
  13. @Peace and Love repeating numbers is helpful? I'm working on completly shutting my mind off and only concentrating of direct experience of physical reality within the framework of the body (Vipassana)
  14. Nail biting is common in children and it is a big problem in dentistry because it leads to orthodontic problems. Bitter and chilly invisible nail polish is sold and you can use it. That won't change the core issue but it would help with the habit.
  15. Welcome to the world of nebulous definitions If you are expecting concrete definitions in the field of spirituality, you will be disappointed. Even the original Sanskrit words are not so sharp anymore. People tend to use same words for different things by twisting its meaning. Not only that when you glance across cultures and traditions you will find dozens of words that denote awareness (consciousness, Self, soul, atman, Shiva, Purusha, spirit, heart, what-have-you). There are more twists, e.g. the word consciousness means something totally different in psychology. Different teachers use same word to mean different things. Then you encounter funny words like frequency, vibration and energy etc (especially in new-age stuff), which share origins with precise scientific terms and cause much trouble. When I see a question posted on the net, it is 50% of the time a confusion about meanings of words. The most confused thing is mind and consciousness. People do not see the difference.
  16. @jse That's a nice and clear explanation of why there cannot be "unconsciousness" or absence of awareness. He said, aware + ness = knowing + being. Isn't that substituting one word with another? I completely get what he is pointing at, but IMHO, it won't be possible to define awareness without inviting trouble That's like trying to define "redness" in words or concepts. Not possible, you see. You can only point at it. (Not implying that awareness is just another quale) The problem is - awareness is not even an experience, you can't even point at it without being it. There are no-two.
  17. You are right. Even scientists do not believe it. The "solid" particles fitting in a sugar cube BS is made up by someone with a shallow knowledge of physics, I suspect. According to firmly established science (about 100 years old now), particles are just probabilities of observing an effect (e.g. mass or charge) at a particular point in space. When you plot all the probabilities, the graph looks like a spread out fuzzy cloud which extends to infinity. In others words, the particles are not there really, but an observer can make them appear by simple act of observation. The important point to note is - the observer must be a conscious observer, an instrument or computer, or camera cannot do that. In essence, physics says that matter is just consciousness. Why do people still cling to the "matter" explanation of the reality? Ignorance. Very very deep ignorance. It doesn't take a lot of effort to see it directly, its always in front of our noses, there is only consciousness, I see nothing else. What would you call a person who can't hear to all those blaring voices of scientists, mystics, religions, philosophers ...saying there is no matter at all?
  18. Pro Tip: Don't do DMT with 5 ppl in the room. Do it alone or with one sitter max. Vaporize it (that's a art of itself) and then take 3 big hits and keep 'em at least 7-10 second inside. Put enough in your pipe because especially in the beginning you'll waste a lot by not knowing how to vaporize it rightly. So, if you take 70mg instead of 50mg let's say, you'll get to the other side. And you can't overshoot with DMT. So you're all safe.
  19. I guess you are asking about the difference between experience before and after enlightenment. If "enlightenment" means a realization that you are pure awareness, the screen made of nothingness on which every experience is projected, then there would be no difference. As Leo said, the difference is now in perspective. It is flipped ! Now, I'm not claiming that I have achieved enlightenment, perhaps the above realization is only a start, but thats how I see it at current stage personally. About time, how much time it takes to know that "you" are awareness? 2 seconds. Right? The time it takes to answer the question - Are you aware now? How much time it takes to abide as awareness without falling back to old way? A life time.... That's the paradox, you see.
  20. Ego is a tool, you decide how to use it.
  21. The ego can only bring suffering if you misplace its position in your world. If you dream, and you know that you dream, there is nothing bad about the dream whatsoever. However, if you dream and you don't know that you dream, the dream might turn into a nightmare very quickly.
  22. @Leo Gura So a person that isn't waking up doesn't know he's aware? That's why I wanted a cleat definition. Because anyone can say: "Here I see an apple, therefor I have awareness. I am aware of the apple" I recently realized that this path is tricky because we mean different things but use the same word. So it's easy to listen and think you got it. But you only got it through your own definitions.
  23. Speaking about everything is "no-thing-ness" I just had to think of this picture: I am not a scientist but I do not believe in the 0,000000001% of matter being "really real" or "really solid". I think that is just what scientists assume without having a real proof. Scientists don't have the tools to examine the remaining 0,000000001% accurately. So there being "real matter" is just what their logic tells them, because they refuse to believe in what Buddhists say for over 2000 years now: That form is emptiness and emptiness is form. This Buddhist statement just doesn't seem rational. And yes, it isn't. It is a paradox. But why do they still believe that the world essentially is rational? The world is an omnipresent miracle.
  24. Why take supplements to suppress them? Why not face them head on, and make them vanish altogether?
  25. That is good
  26. Quitting caffeine is harder than one might think. I myself was addicted to energy drinks at one point in life and decided to quit coffee and energy drinks by reducing the amount gradually much the way you did. For me the headaches stopped in about two weeks from completely quitting. You will also be more tired than usual but this will only be temporary as well. I lived without caffeine for almost a year and then started drinking coffee again for some weird reason (propably social drinking :D). I will quit caffeine alltogether again at some point in the autumn because i myself see it as a bad habbit that harms my life. Try again and try to lengthen the period you are completely without coffee would be my suggestion. And if you fail again, try again until you succeed.
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