Emotionalmosquito

That’s why I wear my trusty shoe boosters. Sad thing is many chicks are still just as or even taller, must be something in the water. (Joke) They’re still helpful though. I still just can’t get over the fact that it’s come to having to approach hundreds upon hundreds of women just to barely start getting the hang of it when other people just end up with someone (often going through a few or several different girls before they get there) just by the natural flow of life. Wtf is wrong with us? Or what’s wrong with modern women, maybe a mix of both? Idgaf anymore about my puny town of 50k not being good enough. I’ll venture out when feasible but otherwise I’m grinding it out right here until everyone starts noticing me as the town freak just for daring to attempt to have the most natural thing in the human experience. I’ll continue increasing my state, learning all the right methods and utilizing them to exhaustion. If nothing else it’ll be just to spite the overly optimistic normies who think “oh you’ll find a girl someday” “She’s out there for you!” ☺️ when they see I’m doing literally everything right without shit to show for it. @Majed tbf I think they’re right about the importance of not being overly reliant on a guru. Even Leo himself says to not take his word for things because finding the truth for ourselves is what matters. All he can do is nudge us in the right direction.

This is pretty much where I’m at at the moment. I’ll need to drive at least an hour or so out at least 2-3 times a week to get any real results since my city is quite bad for game, so job will be required. @Majed How far do you plan on venturing out each time and how often? Or did you mean you need a job more for buying drinks, paying for dates, that stuff?

You must have overlooked some of what I said. I’ve tried all those things to no avail, otherwise I wouldn’t have this problem. I have no money for healthy food. I can’t find a job even after dozens and dozens of applications. I can’t afford the amount of food I’d need to exercise properly because my metabolism is so retardedly high as it is. My will power/discipline is absolutely broken, so brute forcing anything is impossible. I would do SSRIs if it weren’t for the risk of akathisia (the worst side effect known to man)

Never imagined I would’ve ended up this deeply twisted up in a web of addiction to scrolling, gooning, nicotine, hatred, and negative thinking. It’s gotten so bad it’s beginning to devastate my physical health as well. The longer it festers the more physical symptoms it causes like involuntary muscle twitching in random places, extreme fatigue, headaches, weird ass sensations around my scalp and face, and cognitive decline. I wake up almost every night in a state of total fear and a feeling as if my neurons are being raped by digital demons. (I can’t stress enough how horrifying it feels on all levels) Then what do I do? Sometimes start scrolling and gooning again at 3:00 in the morning knowing full well it’s gonna fuck me up exponentially worse. I know how fucked I am and exactly the things causing it, yet I’m utterly powerless to stop doing them. Meditation isn’t cutting it anymore, particularly because I’m far too weak to make myself do enough of it consistently to bear any fruit. I’ve spent a decent chunk of time here complaining about women and not having a girlfriend. But I’ve realized at this point if I were to land one my resentment would likely overpower any bit of sexual fulfillment or companionship such that all I’d want is to beat the living tits off her and abuse her as payback for how much work it took to obtain her as well as for these dumbass bullshit new trends where the girls think it’s so funny to hit us in the balls. I’ve dabbled in cold approach here and there, but as of recent all it does anymore is serve to make me hate women more and more. My brain is so fried it’s genuinely getting scary, my cognition is shit, my sleep is trash and I don’t know what to do anymore. Yes, I’m seeing a mental health professional, no it’s not helping. That’s despite the fact that I now have the best therapist I’ve ever had. What I need is rehab but unfortunately my situation hasn’t yet been identified as destructive enough to be eligible for it. Obviously this barely does it justice, but it gives a general idea of the predicament. I done goofed big time letting things get this bad.

In that case how about I give you or any seasoned pickup veterans a list of things I dare them to say “with good energy” ? Let’s put this idea to the test once and for all.

🚩 🚩 🚩 Immediately start documenting every single bit of evidence you have of her consenting to everything you did. Take screenshots, record as much as possible. Some girls don’t take it too well when you win their heart only to cut them off shortly after. Always be prepared.

In Buddhism they think whatever progress you made in your last life carries over to the next. Whatever impurities you eradicated or new ones you picked up will set the scene for your next incarnation. Nothing about becoming god or returning to absolute infinity, at least not until you’ve had enough lifetimes to do all the work it takes to return to the source of everything. Did somebody just make that up because it sounds logical enough or are they right??? What could possibly be more important than knowing this? The stakes could not be any higher.

https://www.instagram.com/reel/DaTwdZmCGW_/?igsh=ZTR0d2l5eWNtNmdr

If this is true then yes, I want death more than anything. The social game here is abysmal, aside from the few genuinely good friendships I have as well as the occasional cool people you’ll meet. Also the financial system is awful. The only bits of enjoyment I get here are nicotine, video games, shit posting, and some healthy things like picking up litter, dipping in cold springs, going to beaches, and having some money in my wallet. The “Be yourself” meme doesn’t work for everyone due to reasons already discussed many times. Other than that the world is miserable. @LordFall Said, “God is offering you the infinite physical universe, I would be careful with assuming that's a lesser prize.” ❓ ❓❓❓❓❓ It’s a lesser prize because physical life is ridiculously hard. Millions of people in the U.S. alone are one paycheck away from eviction. It’s $3-4 a gallon to fuel your car in the cheaper areas. The affordable foods use ingredients that turn people into what looks like lab rat experiments. The job market is a joke. I’ve filled out dozens and dozens of applications and followed up, no luck. Life would be great if you could just travel around by foot. But things are several thousands of miles apart. The sun would burn your flesh off and dehydrate you to death even faster without copious amounts of water. You would turn into a skeleton from all the calorie expenditure if you’re not replacing it all with nonstop food supply. (The food thing is a problem regardless, I can’t stand eating and the requirement for it.) Life sucks massive donkey dick and I’ve been trying so hard to make it not.

Probably the contrast is what makes it special. Wouldn’t be nearly as meaningful to have it all if you hadn’t first been through a lifetime or more of deprivation. Although that still doesn’t explain why people go through unspeakably horrific waking nightmares. No individual would willingly subject themselves to things like gang rape, torture, etc. Even if the contrast once it’s eventually over is unlimited bliss in every way they ever wanted.

@Raze Here’s the problem: I know what it’s like to be in my full natural authentic self. It’s fun as fuck, it’s freeing, it’s exhilarating and makes life seem worth it. The problem is, that version has gotten me into shit, especially when it comes to women, far more than anything positive. If I start acting with my sets the same way I am with my best friends more often you better be coming to pay my bail. Jeffy is like “Just be yourself, fuck the boring social script and just have fun.” If that actually worked then what am I doing here? Do you think I haven’t tried just that numerous times? Then you’ll say, oh but there’s a certain way you have to do it. You gotta be yourself but with calibration, social/emotional intelligence, wit, the right amount of push pull, and other such restrictive guidelines that only serve to complicate your natural expression. I’m not saying learning all that doesn’t work. I just wish yall would stop acting like pure authenticity alone wins most of the battle. I will invest in a reputable dating coach once I get enough money. Of course things like Dancefestopia keep getting in the way which makes it take longer to save up enough. The irony is big multi day festivals like those are genuinely tons of fun, and there’s a surplus of prime women at them. But apparently I can’t do much about it without hiring a dating coach first.

This is the one right here. This would be THE BEST thing in all of existence. We’re all doing just fine if that’s what’s up. You really think after death you’d get to temporarily hang on to enough of the ego to experience every last one of the desires you never fulfilled? Then once you’ve got your fill you can let go completely and merge with the infinite. What evidence could you provide of this being true?

You don’t need the utmost respect for each other to still have a good time. You can enjoy a no strings attached hookup without either party wanting commitment. Happens all the time. Raze said: “They obviously saw it before you brought it up, they just got weirded out by you randomly bringing it up and seeking a reaction. You also basically told them to go away. If a woman randomly tells you her husband wouldn’t want her there that would be a rejection.” They were about to leave anyway, just not that abruptly. I’ve done enough of these to tell when women are starting to get bored of the interaction and are about to politely depart. They weren’t even shit testing me so there was really no interest beyond friendly chit chat. So it was the perfect time to casually bring it up. Nothing was lost that wasn’t already headed in that direction regardless.

I like to think I have no reputation, therefore nothing to defend or lose. Barely anybody beyond my tiny circle knows I exist, much less who the fuck I am. I’m not on socials, (at least not with real name or face) I’ve spent most of my recent years low profile except the brief periods where I go out to practice a few sets of pickup, heck I don’t even show up anywhere by googling myself. The expanding my social circle thing could be valuable I suppose but the downside is then I’ll have more of a reputation to uphold, thus less freedom of pure authentic expression. Not to mention there’s practically no women here except for at Target and the college campus. I have to drive an hour or two out to find greener pastures.

So death forces people into a mildly annoying state of boredom? Well shit, that’s nothing to worry about at all.