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And also notice this little story: None of you were ever interested in Truth. That's a lie you tell yourself. If you were interested in Truth, you would stare at Redness all day long in absolute bliss and satisfaction. All that is already is Truth. You have no interest in the Rawness of all that Is. Before you could be interested in truth you had to go through an entire quest of Recontextualizing Truth. You basically put a bunch of sugar on your Truth and now that you are "enlightened" you say "Oh look how wonderful truth is". If you had truly through Truth to be wonderful, you wouldn't have needed to recontextualize it at all. You only like Truth in a recontextualized state. You have a very particular kind of selective interest, and Leo in particular values "Understanding" more so than "Truth". If he valued Truth, he would look at Redness and be satisfied. His quest would have been over before it had started. This quest of Understanding is a result of a particulate incarnation. The Truth is this: It was deemed so. That's all. Notice how unsatisfying this is to an intellectual chimp mind greedy for understanding. That kind of chimp mind will naturally ignore this, and go on to seek more and more and more. And it was deemed to be given, as it was deemed to be sought after. It is in no way different from the ant, who has it's own selective desires. For the ant infact, a state of unseparation and grand totality of awareness might already be present and mundane. It might be much more interested in serving it's colony. That which is mundane to the ant might be the entire purpose of all of existence to the chimp mind. Why? Because it was deemed so. Causes don't originate Effects, rather: Causes are deemed to be Causes of Effects.

I just see you taking this as too black and white (or rather, introverted and extroverted), and like you have some resentment around the introversion part that is maybe, probably I think, being unfair due to the resentment. Perhaps coming from some pain in the past or struggles you currently have, which are totally legit and understandable. I could be way off, totally. But just maybe it's best to try and appreciate each side. This doesn't even have to be just a "dishonestly trying to make everything equal so I can feel better" thing, I think if you actually, legitimately, looked at the pros and cons of each side, you'd find a bunch on each. Of course, you'd have to step outside your biases and such, which can be difficult fosho. But ya, just try it out. Even asking others for their input here is a step you can take. Make a list. Think outside the box. You can do this exercise with any polarity. It'll hopefully make you see in a more balanced way and simultaneously feel more at peace, balanced, and whole. What are the downsides of x (your preferred side of the polarity. In this case it sounds like it's extroversion)? Ex: Missing out on the awesome feelings you can have alone doing spiritual exercises; the peace, the bliss, love, etc. Ex: Getting too caught up in what others are doing and then feeling empty due to not living your own values. Ex: Being too social to the point where you have to deal with more politics and interpersonal drama, thus sapping your energy and positivity. and then... What are the upsides of y (the side of the polarity you dislike, in this case introversion)? Ex: Confidence at being able to be anywhere in the world and know you can feel at home since all you need is you. Ex: More thoughtful (not necessarily, but perhaps there's an increased likelihood if you do more introversion) Ex: More clarity in what you want out of life and thus perhaps more chance in getting there. Also... I think it's important to know that not all introverts are necessarily more thoughtful or spiritual, and not all extroverts are necessarily more confident and social capable. Maybe extroverts are in general more comfortable expressing emotions around others which can maybe make them seem more confident. But all the while they could be extremely shy or uncomfortable. I at least have remembered hearing that from people I considered extroverted and very confident. Yet they still suffered from lots of low self-esteem etc.. In Sum: Looks can be deceiving.

How is sitting in a room narcissistic? Maybe I don’t understand. Sitting in a quiet room does simple and pure, don’t it? However, I wouldn’t judge something too fast. I assume you haven’t done it. I haven’t done it, so I really can’t say, but it seems fascinating to experience almost total silence. Most people I know cannot sit in total silence with their own minds. Even studies show that people prefer to be shocked than to sit for 15 mins with their own thoughts. If you can do this quiet room while being totally in bliss and no desire for anything else, then you have “accomplished” something most humans haven’t. You have found a happiness most cannot even dream of. Doing this while in pain and suffering is a whole other level. What are the goals relative to? Why do you use your mind at all? It is all for your survival as an ego. Pretty much everything you do is to survive as an ego. Take note of all of what you do and all your goals and really ask whether it is in your self-interest or not. It is all dependent on your ego, your self-identity. What doesn’t make sense?

All it takes for You to get conscious of Truth -> Awakening to your true nature. Get to know Yourself/God/Consciousness/This. You are Truth. This is why the only way to the Kingdom of Heaven is the 'Son of God', 'The son of God' is God in form = You dreaming the whole world up rn, including your human ego-mind & body. This is the entire Universe. ->Your direct experience.<- Pointer : To die before you die. (Ego-death) I'm not talking about physical death or harming your physical body by any means. This Universe/Life on Earth = Your direct experience How did the Universe begin ? The Universe is an idea. Your direct experience, this right now is The Universe. *Year zero* began when You/God started to imagine Its birth as a human on a planet called Earth. Which is Now. (The present moment and Consciousness are One. This is Eternity. There is no time You are absolute) You wanted to experience the duality of goodness and pain. Without you dreaming up the whole narrative, your past, birth & childhood and so on, this present moment = ? Words are just pointers.. You are the Creator. The Creation doesn't exist on its own. Everything is being held within Consciousness. Because Consciousness = You = God dreaming up your present experience. Please, never attempt to kill your physical body before its natural timing. Nature and God are one. The natural flow of things is the manifestation of Infinite Intelligence. Don't rush it. Natural death is the ressurection, the cemetery cross is a metaphor. Well, now try to guess what it means. And the fact that after that you take the universe/direct experience/dream with you as the awakened whole God. (God/You/I/The Creator is going to ressurect Reality after this dream will be over) Then create a new Earth/Dream, whatever You want, as you leave this dream of pleasant and unpleasant stuff, and enter The Kingdom of Heaven/ Infinite, absolute Goodness/Paradise as Realized-Truth, Fully Realized God, Lucid Dreaming in Paradise as God. Infinite will. Love Bliss Everything You please & love. You came into form/started dreaming *the world of good and evil* in order to know Yourself/ to get completely God-Realized. It's the prelude before Eternal bliss, heaven & love Pointer -> Metaphor -> (read beyond words, see beyond symbols) 'Solar Eclipse' being held within 'One Sky' Two Eyes One Seer One light, two candles Solar Eclipse, One Sky One in control, two hands (All the above just words/pointers, return to the present moment/direct actuality, for that is truth, that's where/what I'm/You're pointing at.) In order to look into your eyes you have to look into the mirror. What's behind/outside of your direct experience? The universe/Direct experience is like a mirror of God's Imagination. There's no human face, the idea of your human face is dream stuff as everything else that appears as some thing in your direct experience. Your never saw your face. God has no human face. Your face is formlessness. This right here right now is It, God is Consciousness dreaming up the whole creation game rn. Pointer ... One Eclipse ? One "Sky" "?" Truth will never make you suffer because suffering is the byproduct of not being awake. If you try to find out the truth by searching for answers to questions regarding the context of this dream, you will only get so far. If you want truth, don't look into the painting for answers. Look for the artist. Not His avatar, not his paintings. The One looking is The One. Which is What? Well, ??? Hi there, You eternal Me. ? Whatever Avatars/Creation/GodinForms - Oneness, One Love, One God, Wholeness ❤ Oh God Self-realization = God-Realization = Truth = Liberation ❤? Much Looooooooove

I am sure there are people here who could assist me with the idea of material matters. It is definitely my weakest pursuit in life. I have no income at all. Money seems to have always come to me by happen stance so that I have enough to buy whatever I desire, such as trips overseas, computers or good food. But for many years now, I have long desired to find a place to live by myself, alone, and have been working on many projects to see to it that it does happen some time in the future. In the waking world, I am totally at peace with the situation as is, because I always internalize every situation as being spiritually useful and it has indeed allowed me to find an astonishing degree of personal happiness, bliss, and fearlessness in all situations. Yet, within the subconscious plane, I basically just lied to you. There are the occasional times when I dream, I am met face to face with a true inadequacy— voices that say I am "lazy", or "stupid", a strange energy of underachievement mixed with doubt, that i am doing the "right" thing. When I wake up from such intense energy, I meditate and this energy of doubt goes away. Hm, how convenient for me? I strongly desire more spiritual realization and freedom to do as I please. This is the crux of my bind, that needs illuminated (and I will probably challenge you on anything you suggest so be careful!) Everyday, I happen to be able to do whatever I want with absolutely no obligations to anyone. I don't have to meet or talk with anyone unless I am absolutely certain they will raise my vibration (so to speak), which also means that I can end conversations short if I feel so inclined. So is the case, that when I work longer than an hour or two on my projects I feel my bliss starting to leave me. Thus, I never work more than my bliss allows. But, no further am I, in fulfilling that small (yet still persuasive) desire for a home of my own. With no real focus on any particular project, so far my plan is to continue at the pace I have been going, and simply trust that eventually my work will improve or (by the grace of the universe) my work will simply start catching on. In this way, I can focus on my enlightenment as primary and burn through the belief I need more instead of the karma of desiring more. Perhaps your perspective could grant me additional insight on the matter.

What ive read sofar from the replies is that suffering and pain is intentially a fundemantel mechanism for seperation and survival. So yes, God loves turture and pain and we dont have any choice but to accept it. For me evryone who thinks this is all about bliss, love and free will has only seen one side of the coin.

Thanks. Yeah..my perspective on life is constantly changing, but awakenings can often happen spontaneously, so how you spend your time and even your awareness and perception of reality can change dramatically. These are often very profound experiences, but you can expect many awakenings in a lifetime. Yet life goes on. But You are reborn. You do not “shift,” and go on from there, with a new, ‘spiritual’ perspective of life. “You” are gone. 100% stark, non-existent and gone. The “character” continues to move around. Things continue to happen. Tasks continue to get done. Movement moves. But “you” are not there. Life flows. But there is no longer a ”you” that watches, analyzes, judges or even participates in the flow of Life. You are the Flow of Life. You can no longer separate “yourself” from Now, from the flow, from Reality, as if you are this separate ‘entity’ that is the “liver” of this life. You are Life. As Life, you have no concern for ‘how “you” feel.’ Life doesn’t think about, or stop to alter, how It “feels.” It just Is. It just goes on. You just are. So there’s no “you” looking to see how you can make yourself “feel” better across your day. Nor is there an “enlightened” you “feeling” permanent Oneness and bliss. As Life, you have no thought called “I’m awakened/enlightened.” You’re just Life, Reality. Feelings come and go, phenomena seem to rise and fall, but “you” are gone. So You must just be a part of this One Thing. And of course that's just one facet of awakening aka no self.

For me, it started after I had a complete breakdown (the Dark Night of the Soul) in which I lost everything - I sank into a deep depression and lost my will to live. I underwent intense therapy. Then, after a little of unbelievable suffering, Iditating and all of a sudden I felt like my mind was expanding and I was in a different dimension. I felt completely alive and free and at peace. I felt like I was looking down on earth and I could see anything and everything. I saw limitless dimensions that I knew to be different levels of consciousness, like layers around the earth. I could see and be anywhere and everywhere in the world instantly and I could see and be with anyone, living or dead and I felt at complete peace. I felt that I was in heaven and like I had seen the other side after life and it was exhilarating. I came to truly understand incredibly profound things, including things that I had read before, but had never truly comprehended until that moment. I had the overwhelming realisation that when you want nothing you have everything. I felt overwhelming joy. I felt like I had everything, because I wanted nothing. I can’t describe the state of bliss, completion and peace that I felt. It truly was an awakening.

If you want to achieve endless orgasms one after another for hours, without ejaculating, try massaging your prostate. But it's a very hard thing to achieve. Although, you might be one of the guys that gets it quick. Look up Super-O. This is the Holy Grail of men's orgasms. I've read stories of guys having enlightenment experiences from these types of orgasms. Like having DMT-like experiences, or witnessing white light or eternal bliss, amazing stuff like that. It really sounds surreal. I've been trying for 5 years now and can only get an ejaculatory orgasm (still very very great, compared to a regular orgasm). But it's a mind reprogramming thing, which I haven't figured it out yet. Wonder if I ever will. There's a subreddit named ProstatePlay, you can check it out. Edit: Just read again the thing about your addiction to fapping. Yeah, I've read stories where guys would become addicted to this too. Why go out if you can have orgasms for 4 hours straight, one after another, each one building on top of the previous one. Fuck. I still want to do it though.

Yes .I no longer have any goals .everything is perfect just the way it is .nothing needs to be achieved. I'm perfect love and harmony. Eternal bliss .

Ignorance is bliss.

@Godishere I just listened to Leo's solipsism video. It was by no exaggeration the best video he ever made .its a shams that he took it down. It guided me directly to myself as God. And I've also contemplated this stuff for myself for years. It's all clear to me right now. Im the only conscious thing In existence and everything is my dream .I'm eternal bliss and goodness that there are no words to describe. But you can get there through many ways psychedelics, meditative exercises. Or simply questioning the hell out of everything until you completely deconstruct your mind and sense of reality. There is only one Dreamer. YOU. YOU are imagining your parents .but not just them. The entire physical universe is your own imagining at work .

@Ulax practcie kriya yoga.kriya yoga gives amazing intoxicating states/ecstacy/bliss for hours.i had the best moments of my life from kriya yoga.no amount of money and woman will make u happy like kriya yoga

@Kalki Avatar Bliss tears and cosmic giggles. What more you want?

Hello! I wanted to share a note I took from Leo's video. I still love watching his relatively old, motivational type videos as much as i love his newer, deep, metaphysical videos. The video's called: “A Vision for the Self-actualized life - Get Yo Ass Inspired!” (part 1) Self-actualization is: The realization of one’s potentials, capacities, and talents The fulfillment of one’s mission in life A fuller knowledge of one’s intrinsic nature Getting really in touch with your authentic self Becoming a whole human being An unceasing trend towards unity and integration within oneself Maslow's two types of pleasures: Scarcity pleasure - relief that one gets from loss of tension and anxiety Abundance pleasure - ecstasy of functioning at one’s prime; the bliss you get from living an excellent, virtuous life, acing life Self-actualization is an unceasing trend/pursuit of: Humanity Creativity Knowledge Fairness Rationality Playfulness Authentic love Virtue Truth Beauty Feeling of joy Deep gratitude & fulfillment with life What’s possible for you: To feel Creatively alive every single day To turn your work into your top passion To make the most meaningful contribution that you can possibly make to the world To be a leader and be someone who’s inspirational to others To free yourself of your neurosis, fears, and other limitations To learn and master all the key areas of life (career, health, wealth, friendships, intimate relationships, self-esteem) To learn and master emotional development To learn and master family life ----------------------------- It continues though. I'll post the part 2 of my note later.

"The relative self keeps existing but you're not identified with it" is an accurate statement, but it doesn't capture the seriousness of the situation. It makes it seem like it's something trivial that you can shrug off. No, from the perspective of the relative self who transitions into this state, it feels like absolute death, and the ramifications are obvious: you will be dead forever and you will never come back, or even more accurately, you will be perpetually dying. Of course the upshot to that means immense bliss and peace, but it's by no means a joke. You're framing it as a failure to communicate while it's more a difference of emphasis. Enlightenment is not a joke. When you're given the opportunity to surrender, the question of dating or not dating should've been decided a long time ago.

I think the UK is similar to this, they love their monarch, no matter how many scandals the monarchy is involved in. I personally do not see a problem with Czar-ship or dictatorship as long as people are benefitting from it. These days I'm increasingly against democracy, not that I actively favor a dictatorship as I'm aware of the trouble, yet, democracy has huge holes in it and America is a prime example of these holes, it basically causes a bipartisan system difficult to control, there is more homogeneity in a dictatorship at least, since dissent is discouraged, it's like this forum, if you have too much democracy here, even trolls will get to survive and proliferate unattended, you'd need some degree of tyranny( although it's leadership not tyranny but it will appear like tyranny) in order to maintain peace by throwing out the trolls. Similarly positive dictators will be able to sort out the gold from the dirt much better than democracies and this can stop internal chaos. Democracy gives an illusion of goodness. But ignorance is always bliss.

Entry 12: Chaos with some bliss. This week I've been a bit of a mess. I wasn't used to working eight hours a day and waking up early. This messed up my sleep, made me sluggish throughout the day and when I got home, I barely had any energy to work on personal developement work. Only two out of the four days I read Limitless. The other two days I yielded to my brother wanted to play magic: The Gathering which I used the excuse of it being a experience that I was doing consciously. It was partially true however, as I now know I treated it in the same way I do with movies. A escape from reality for a little bit of dopamine that quickly fades away. I'll only play to bond with him if I have time, but other than that I will abstant from the low concious activity. Yesturday I watched Leo's Video on Being a strategic Motherfu.... (that word I dare not to say) - The 7 Pillars Of Strategic Thinking. It made me plan ahead and quite lilterally, force me to spend hours planning my future 20 years ahead. Now though, I know what I'll do as I planned it for more or less what I want to do. First I'll complete high school, get into a social science program, get a bachelor in psychology, get a masters and a doctorate in counselling psychology to become a counselling psycohlogist. I'll then work to pay off the debts of this. while doing so with part time jobs during my study and afterwards as well. I'll try moving as soon as my finacial situation allows, getting a roomate to cut costs. Finally, once I have accumulated enough wealth, I'll use it to get a life coach certification (if needed) and then start my company which will be healing people, followed by improving them once there healed. I'll do this until I retire, which I will delay as much as possible. However, when I do, my life purpose will be complete. This is probably the time where I'll discover the truth and take Leo's course on discoever it, which I hope he'll release within 40 years. Note: This is a rough sketch of my life plan, I neglected a lot such as relationships and the small, details plans to not write this all day. It is though, a solid plan for me up to now. Other than that, from Friday and forward, I've been reading and preparing to go back to school. The readings definitely helped me out, as it made me gain a insight/reminder of something I forgotten. I love to read! I've gotten a little stale because I wasn't reading and I feel like that made my days working as a janitor harder as I wasn't advance, making my life stale. Now I know though, I'll make sure to always read when I'm down, especially french fantasy books as it lifts my spirits as much as personal developement. (a little side hobby of mine to boost my morale from time to time when needed) That is all though, so see you next week!

My direct awakening experiences around reincarnation came from a few years ago after getting very sick, and while exploring memento mori, they have given me personally tailored truths, that reincarnation is the name of the game. If you have not experienced proof of this, don't worry about it - each person's path is unique and we are each given different pieces of the puzzle. The less you conceptualize it and the more you actually face your fears around death, if you have any, you'll be more likely to have a direct awakening into reincarnation. The process is called memento mori, and by learning about different cultures, by practicing dying before you die, what can happen is that you can get a download aka awakening into the nature of reincarnation. You are really just "here" and always were, but the outside layer changes. This is what goes on after death: Break me in don't break me down Swimming in these empty towns I wonder if it's all so master planned Diving into sweeter bliss Falling fair before we miss Taste the taste before it's gone and you're too late Won't change what I am To find who you are Can't stay in these lines When I'm bursting at the seams My body might collapse If I carry one more dream If I carry one more dream I could be anything I could be anything Breaking out beyond the night Reeling in the quieter times Saving all the flavors of my mind Reflecting on the lessons learned The broken bonds and bridges burned Take the taste of hate and throw it away Won't change what I am To find who you are Can't stay in these lines When I'm bursting at the seams My body might collapse If I carry one more dream If I carry one more dream I could be anything I could be anything Some sources on reincarnation: Jane Robert's Seth Speaks books and Sri Aurobindo's book "The Psychic Being" along with the Tibetan Book of the Dead. Check out NDE's as well, and listen to people who are going through the dying process. Get very comfortable with it. Start a journal. Live, breath and feel it = what is inevitable, the body will pass on... go through every emotion that comes up with bravery - nature respects and rewards bravery - and offer gratitude and Love. Love combined with surrender can wake a person up if they practice this. You have to go on your own path to find the truth of reincarnation and not what me or anybody tells you. Awakening experiences happen when a person is ready usually, when they have inquired into something with an honesty and a curiosity. The answers to whether reincarnation exists rests within this research, spiritual practice, honesty, open heartedness and bravery. Some questions to get a person started: Am I afraid of death? If so why? What do I think will happen? And then go from there. There's a whole rabbit hole when it comes to exploring this kind of stuff, most people that genuinely have insight into reincarnation got there through going through some form of a death, be it an NDE or a spiritual death, an ego death, even when someone close dies, they can experience loved ones giving them messages about the other side.

Burn through your karma. Shadow work. The best way to grow up the ladder is to do as much shadow work as possible. Really get to know everything about yourself as the human that you are, for this incarnation. Treat yourself as soul that is on a journey and is growing as much as possible. The Seth material by Jane Roberts and the Psychic Being by Sri Aurobindo are both good reading material that can teach you how to do this from a yellow/turquoise perspective. You'll have to do a lot of learning, detaching, and meditation. You will want to get to the point where you can see/feel the screen, where you are above your emotions and thoughts as the witness. When you die, you can imagine whatever you want. Nahm's dreamboard idea helps bring positive things into your life, and the actions you take will carry over. What do you want out of this life, deeply, feel into your soul. Love. Deeply. Do good things that feel in alignment with who you are and your purpose. Rather than worrying about the next life, make this one the best you can. This carries over, not the feelings of not wanting to be human - as the soul actually loves learning and being all sorts of things - what you can do is direct your life in a way that includes the next life. Do you have a goal that you would like to accomplish that would take more than one lifetime? Often, martial arts teaches that it takes a few lifetimes to become a master - and so people learning think in terms of next life aptitude. You can direct your soul in any way you like. But the best way is to open your heart and follow what that intuition tells you. Also, Love. Love deeply, as Love is what opens the doors. Practice Love. The soul has an inherent direction to move towards, and it is all just about uncovering that soul and moving in what feels most 'right' to you. Reincarnation is like a katamari, you pick up as much stuff as you can (learn as much) and when you die, you get to "make" your next world based on what you have learned. Maybe you will want to be human again, maybe something else. Think of yourself as an archeologist uncovering hidden aspects of your deep psyche. Practice your death, pretend you are dying right n ow and go through all of the experiences - do you feel complete, or that more needs to be done? Do those things, practice your death again - until you are at peace. ^Take what feels right and throw away the rest, or set it aside - follow what works for you. Break me in don't break me down Swimming in these empty towns I wonder if it's all so master planned Diving into sweeter bliss Falling fair before we miss Taste the taste before it's gone and you're too late Won't change what I am To find who you are Can't stay in these lines When I'm bursting at the seams My body might collapse If I carry one more dream If I carry one more dream I could be anything I could be anything Breaking out beyond the night Reeling in the quieter times Saving all the flavors of my mind Reflecting on the lessons learned The broken bonds and bridges burned Take the taste of hate and throw it away Won't change what I am To find who you are Can't stay in these lines When I'm bursting at the seams My body might collapse If I carry one more dream If I carry one more dream I could be anything I could be anything

@Koeke I'll provide some source materials, and then I give a few comments. Information regarding Khecarimudra can be found in most Yogic scriptures, such as Dattatreya Yoga Sastram, Goraksha Samhita, Hatharatnavali, Hatha Yoga Pradipika, Shiva Samhita, Khecarividya, and the Yoga Upanishads, as well as many others. I don't know of many contemporary writers that really have anything to add beyond what can be found in the source texts. In the past, this teaching was considered secret, and it was only given from guru to disciple. I was fortunate enough to have a guru who was well versed in the subject. In the scriptures, there are details about how to prepare for the practice, how to perform it, and what are the fruits of the practice. Usually the preparation involves cutting and stretching. I honestly would not recommend this path unless you are being guided directly by a knowledgeable guru. I will say that there is another way that does not involve knives, which is Sahaja Yoga. The creative force or energy of Consciousness is called Shakti. In the body, this energy is referred to as Prana. Prana is responsible for maintaining all the functions of the body, and this energy is subdivided into 5 vayus (literally "winds"). The two most important are Prana vayu and Apana vayu. There are thousands of energy channels, or nadis, in the body, but the 3 most important ones are the Ida (to the left of center), Pingala (to the right), and the Sushumna (in the middle). Prana vayu, warm in nature, normally flows up the Ida nadi, and Apana vayu, cold in nature, flows down the Pingala nadi. In Yoga, the Prana vayu must reverse it's flow and meet Apana in the Mooladhara, or root chakra. This is the meaning of "Hatha Yoga," which translates as Sun-Moon union. This generates a great deal of heat, which disturbs the Goddess Kundalini, awakens her, and ultimately motivates her to move up through the Sushumna nadi, pulling Prana along with it. When this energy reaches beyond the throat chakra, Kecharimudra is the technique that takes it to the next level, which is the Ajna chakra between the eyebrows. All of the physical postures, movements, and breathing exercises in Hatha Yoga are for the purpose of purifying the energy channels, uniting the vayus, and raising the energy through the Sushumna to the Sahasara chakra above the head. At the stage where Khecarimudra manifests, your whole relationship to sexuality is transformed. You'll begin to understand what true union and bliss really are. It's not the final stage, but it is very advanced. I apologize for only scratching the surface, but this is a very deep science. Perhaps if there are specific questions, I can attempt to address those.

@axiom His fear could be deeper than that. An existential fear of Russia losing its identity when the West gets too much influence over Russia. He already saw Ukraine slowly 'westernizing' and feared the same thing happening to Russia. That the westerfication of Russia will make it lose its identity, and in turn, makes Putin lose his identity. Because Russian culture is the only thing he truly trusts, and if that slips away, Putin will have nothing to hold onto any longer. A fear of change can be pretty brutal on some people, even if that change is for the better. A lot of people rather have familiar misery, than uncertain bliss.

Goals: Practicing yoga every single day. Full time yoga teacher. Building a 6 figure income through teaching yoga. Highly proficient Mandarin Chinese fluency. 10,000+ word vocabulary. Radiant health and strength. Be a multi millionaire. Buying a house. Buying a Tesla. Realizing God. Self-Actualizing. Happiness. Bliss. Peace. Calm. Joy. Attracting my Dream girlfriend and high quality intimate relationship. Starting a concious awakened family in 10 or so years from now.

The character you're experiencing is a character, i.e. an imaginary construct, that only seems 'concrete' and 'real' because you simultaneously imagine 'time', 'space', 'brain', 'physical world', 'other', 'self' etc. Consider that everything you "know" about yourself, i.e. age, education, friends, parents, siblings, job, country, year & date & time, girlfriends, life events, personality, that your body is 'yours' , every fucking thing in reality is nothing else than a story, a serious story, sure, but still in the end just social conditioning, programming. You're hard-coded by your genes and upbringing to believe you are 'a person that was born and that can and will die' ... The most fascinating thing we do to our children is we tell them 'please, Thomas(ine), be a good boy/girl and be it by yourself, not because we told you to!'... You see? We tell our children they should be loving, good, tolerant, well-behaved adults, while simultaneously telling them that if they don't feel that naturally, they are still sinning. You see how fucked up that is? It's called a "double-bind" (google the term). We are basically programming souls (our true most essential nature) into socially survival-oriented robots (ego) without telling these souls that we did it. Dude, all of your beliefs, age, history: it's all code. And you didn't code it yourself (most of it not, at least). Age? Who gives a fuck about age. Career? Who gives a fuck about your career. Beliefs? Who gives a fuck about what you believe in. Success, money, your outward fake appearance? Who gives a damn. Well, dude, I don't, cos I'm not sleeping in ego anymore, but most people actually seen to take all these 'statistics'/stories very, very seriously, and they seem to be happy with it (being robots, being asleep). But when it dawns on you one day, that the whole of your life has been nothing but code/programming, well that fucking hurts. That fucking hurts. Ignorance is Bliss as they say. But when you have that realization, you are basically beginning to wake up. And when you are completely tired of fake games and inauthenticity, well, then you're gonna wake up. But it takes time. You can't fuck around with ego or survival. It takes time. You are already completely perfect in the eyes of God. Reality is an eternal Infinite process/movement; and you're right in the middle of that process.

@Raptorsin7 In hindsight yes. The journey has been difficult. Kriya brings up A LOT from the subconscious. No spiritual journey is a linear easy path. Kriya is a powerful path but you will have to face your self again and again. Deep rooted memories, emotions, traumas, kriya brings ALL that shit to the surface, no hiding. But after 6 years, now the fruits are truly being reaped. Was worth all the struggle. Life is Bliss. Life is Love. Life is Joy. Life is Peace. You are all beautiful.