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@Alien It’s the ‘make a living from it’ thoughts. You’re makin one 15 minute meditation as big as your life purpose. Can’t do that man, it’ll snap ya right outta the now. Gotta snap back in! That’s the baggage, or resistant thinking. Let that go completely. See that meditation is paradoxical, in that, when you drop the attachment of making money from meditation, spirituality, waking folks up in general - then - I’m be damned, that, is exactly where meditation will take you. Meditate just for the awesomeness of clearing your head, do it simply for the now of it, just to be present. The answer, is in a big way, always to let go of what we want. Later on, yet soon enough, it strolls into our lives. Universe is funny. Feels good to let go of that mental baggage, right? Hell ya it does.

Guys, I read from different sources that, you can recover from suffering only after enlightenment. So in this suffering I surrendered myself to pain, fear and was in the now. The fear, anxiety took my body and I was shaking. I stayed like that for hours, but did not get enlightened. I was checking constantly "is it enlightenment?". I thought if I never get enlightened I will be trapped in this torture. The fear increased. I waited may be increased suffering would make me stop identifying with mind. But nothing happened. And the next days I found out that I have new obsessive mission. ENLIGHTENMENT. I read for hours about enlightenment on internet. All I had in my mind was enlightenment. "I should achieve it, otherwise I will be incomplete forever. This is my only salvation." I wanted to stay in now and I was able to do that for several seconds and when my mind wandered I would bring it to the now. Although the now was horrible, boring, empty and frightening. I was trying to stay in the now with hope that I will train my mind not to feel emptiness in the now by practice. But the idea "enlightenment" does not let me do it anymore. It says "why are you in the now, move your ass and get enlightened as soon as possible. You are either in or out. It is binary. Devote yourself to enlightenment completely and after achieving it, you will live your life. Enjoy your tea, hang out with your friends and etc." I have had a lot of obsessive missions before, and I know how hard to kick them, almost impossible. And if I am able to kick them a huge emptiness replaces them where I have no drive to do anything. Please, tell me what to do? I surrender to pain and fear, but they dont subside. Does surrendering mean that I should live with them forever? But it is impossible. I cant relax, enjoy my life when I have pain and fear. Can an enlightened person enjoy the moment while somebody is cutting his arm off. I bought Eckhart Tolle's book "The Power of Now" last year and started to read it slowly. In the beginning I thought it is a book of a wise man who fought against depression and won. Who will give practical advice how to be happy. But it turned out this book was somehow mystical. Who speaks about existence, god, and claims all people feel incomplete and unhappy because they are detached from god's energy and will always be like that until they rewire to that energy. And his practical advice does not help me as well. He says when you are in the now you will feel energy. But I dont. I feel boredom, fear, anxiety, emptiness, no drive to do anything. My mind says "come to me, think, find an answer and get content". I do, find an answer, get content, but for seconds. And this cycle repeats. I have found answers which seemed to make me feel full forever, but it lasts short. My mind is always hungry. But when I come back to now I dont feel any attachment, love to now. It feels like alien. I had hope that I would rewire my mind to be in now with meditation and forcing myself to be in the now. But now I got a belief that whatever I do, how much I do, does not matter if I dont get enlightened. I want to persuade myself that I am not my mind, but I cant. I had a hope that with practice I can get a happy, content life. But now I dont. Because even if enlightenment exists and I practice hard to get there I probably will fail with such a desire to get enlightened. Psychotherapists say "you have a disorder and we can cure it", I say "no, it is not a disorder, all people including you psychotherapists are in pain, because we have dewired from existence and will suffer until enlightenment." So here I am paralyzed, not knowing what to do. I started antidepressant therapy again and actually it reduced my anxiety and fear a little bit.

That's why we are here, to help him. He is the Alien DEVIL Lucifer pushing psychedelica to spiritualists so he can lure them in eternal illusion MUHAHAHAHA!

So I had a few weird experiences the other day, they felt alien. I was in the car on the way to work with my brother and all of a sudden everything became the same thing. There was no difference from my brother than the tree outside or the car outside. All labels went out the window and everything became the same thing? lol it sounds weird but I don't know what happened but it confused the shit out of me later. This lasted for about 2-3 minutes then everything went back to normal. Then it happened again like 30 minutes later and lasted for about 5 minutes. Fast forward to the next day, I was at the gym and I went to the bathroom. When I was taking a piss in the urinal it felt like I was pissing on myself? It felt like a strange loop. Like I was the urinal/bathroom and I was taking a piss on myself. Again, I was extremely confused. Anyone else have any weird experiences like this? I'm still mind fucked from them tbh

Do you mean I should keep thinking to wake up? When somebody says this I get defensive of not thinking, because my first problem arose because of long thinking when I was 13 (In 2000). I remember clearly, how I thought about life, existence, Allah (I was muslim), soul and etc several consequent days and jumped to a conlusion that there is no Allah, or any other extraordinary omnipotent power, there is no soul, nothing is sacred, we are just biologic creatures with mind. I was shocked. As if something very valuable disappeared inside me. I fell into emptiness. The fear took the whole me. I tried to kick those thoughts away, but could not. The following days I thought more and I could not understand why we are here, who am I, can I trust myself, what if everything is an illusion. Very freak thoughts came to my mind which I cant articulate well. When there is a period that I am very busy with something (material things), these thoughts dont come or come rarely. But since 2013 I feel terrible and on antidepressants. When I contemplate existential stuff, I get worse. Do you think, I should think no matter how I feel? I have been meditating since June and since December it seems I have decreased the amount of thinking and daydreaming. But have not seen any improvement in my mental state. Horrible. Constant pain. And I desperately want relief. When fear is overwhelming I panic, cry, beg. When fear is not that strong I embrace it. I embrace pain. Especially during meditation. My heart seems it will stop, but I go on. However neither pain nor fear disappear. Today I told myself I would not involve my mind until 1st March. So after that date I may start to think and seek answers. I was somehow successful in it. Although pain went up, I tried to stay in present moment and neglect mind, no matter how insecure I felt. But as soon as fear came, I tumbled down to my mind again in order to find immediate relief with the help of thinking. The worst is when I am outside, because even in such a situation I dont want to show my weakness to strangers (I care other people's opinion so much) and therefore fear doubles outside. I know why I need to answer my questions. I want to find absoluteness. So I wont get lost. I want to see the meaningfulness. I dont see meaning. But I guess I would not see meaning even if there was a God. I would still say why and feel discontent. I remember when I was 13 I imagined eternal life in heaven and got scared. I thought dying and not having a soul is better than eternal life. But actually when I feel terrible everything sounds scary to me. I am on treatment since 2013. I have seen two different psychotherapists. I want to neglect the pain and live my daily life outside of my mind, but it consumes my energy. Can anybody with a strong headache dance? Nor me with strong mental pain. What to do then? Meditation? Can I get better without enlightenment, or will I suffer until I get rid of ego (which I doubt will happen to me) ? Is it better to neglect mind completely until I am doing something related to my job? The more I neglect the mind, the worse I feel, sometimes a huge pain, which I think I wont handle. But it seems the only way to recover. Should I decrease mind day by day or stop it abruptly? I have quitted cigarette, cannabis, alcohol. Is quitting mind also like them? I have a huge emptiness inside me, which seems to produce fear. Yes I try to avoid pain and bad feelings. I try to focus on something else, because I am afraid I will not be able to handle those feelings. Are not all thoughts different and independent of each other? Should I believe in fairy tails, happy ends or live without expectations? Do you think existential thoughts are easily defined concepts? Actually sometimes I dont get those thoughts, but get those feelings that everything is alien, stranger. Everything is dark. I want to live so much. I think this is also a problem. I should face the possibility that I may suffer forever or may commit suicide. Eternal pain is sometimes inevitable.

hahaha love leo the alien

@ZX_man Nonsense. This is why we question dogma and think for ourselves rather than listening to Buddhist scriptures. "Man" or "Woman" is a false identity anyhow. What you are isn't a man or woman. And in fact, your consciousness is identical to that of every other living creature, from an ant to an elephant to a space alien. All of you are identical.

@Alien You answered your own question. If enlightenment is raw reality, and reality is infinite, well... there you have it. You can keep exploring it forever.

do, or do not. I'm so sick of trying. Trying to meditate every day for upwards of two years, only to have negative thoughts still get to me. I see thoughts as sensations, and yet, the negativity loves to sneak up and consume me anyway. Trying to be diligent in my daily yoga practice (which usually takes an hour) for the past three months, only to have my body fight back and lock up. My anxiety is insistent and never-ending. My body can't stop holding, as if it's saying, "You're not done yet, JJ. Not yet not yet not yet. Gotta do ____ and ____ and learn as much as you can so you can be a paragon for all to behold." Well, fuck you, body. I'm sick of it. Trying to fit into a society centered around shallowness and denying death. No one really cares what I have to say, nor do I have much of value to say. People value cat videos, not depth. Anything to anesthetize them from the gaping black hole in the center of their existence. Honestly, I envy them. At least they can fit in and live a normal life without having the burden of worrying about all this shit. At least they can have a nice dream. At least they don't have to feel like an alien, like an outsider. Trying to hold a job. I got rejected from a barista job, for fuck's sake. I lasted six weeks as a cashier. Even dog walking, a job that's perfect for my personality - I started to go crazy after six months and have to quit. That happened twice over two years. Trying to be friendly in front of everyone (can't help it - Fe extraverted feeling function of an infj). Putting on this mask for everyone around me, even my family. And the moment I try to open up to them, like last night: "It's all bullshit, JJ. Mind over matter! How could you say that?" This is what happens when I try to take off the mask. I get shot down. I can't be authentic in front of anyone, because it'll just scare them away. Then, fear of abandonment kicks in. Then, fear of not being able to support myself kicks in, because of the last point. So I feel trapped in that sense. Trying to be a friend, or maintain a friendship. I have a bunch of aquaintances that I hardly keep in touch with, and I had one friend for awhile, who I now also barely keep in touch with. So basically, no friends. Too much effort to be a friend. Too much effort to find someone out there in person who I can actually relate to without the mask. Trying to date. Ohhh, man, I could write for hours about this one. I get clingy and obsessive the moment I have a deeper connection, which drives me nuts, and it does the other person a disservice. Then fear of abandonment/rejection kicks in and sabotages due to Fe. Then the relationship turns into this: Full of second-guessing and brutal honesty. Then, the girl ends up rejecting me anyway, because there's no polarity, because I'm too passive, because I'm "too much of a wuss," as my brother says, because I implode and put all the blame on myself, because my body shuts down and I can't say anything more. Yeah. I'm sick of doing that. Makes sense why my body has unconsciously cut off circulation from the waist down. Trying to create stuff. The inner critic often kicks in and tries to filter everything I write. Especially the case with songwriting, though it's gotten better. Trying to make it all work. Because it's not working. Nothing feels like it's working. I feel better than ever in my body, mind, and spirit, but this "adulthood" thing still doesn't work for me.

@Alien Did you have an actual realization, or is it just mental masturbaton with concepts presented to you which might not be true?

@Alien You're from Lower Saxony? Me too! What a coincidence to find someone on this forum who's so close to me geographically, haha. But yeah, Leo's totally right bruh, even just a glimpse of it will completely turn your life upside down, you can be absolutely sure about that. I certainly don't claim to be fully enlightened but I can say that I've gone quite far down that road and let me tell you...pretty much every year post-enlightenment, you will be like "Who was that guy a year ago?", and then it will even turn into "Who was that guy just a month ago?", even though after a while you will always assume to be on top of the enlightenment-mountain because you think to yourself "How could this even get any better?!", but, it does get better continuously - it practically never stops which is the most beutiful thing about it.

@Alien Something tells me you will be extra pleased when you finally glimpse the Absolute

@Alien Well, of course, if you're into this work, that already makes you rather exceptional. My theory is, some people just naturally like to get their mind fucked. Those are the ones who gravitate towards nonduality. I'm like that. With that said, even though I love a good mindfuck, I also love my ego. So a tug-of-war must happen. The real test of how much you love a good mindfuck is: if there was a mindfuck so deep the only way you could glimpse it was by killing yourself, would you do it? The only reason you're gravitating towards it right now is because your mind doesn't really understand the extent of the mindfuck. You like little mindfucks. But you do not like big mindfucks which will totally obliterate you. The big mindfucks will take you totally by surprise, and it's good they do because otherwise you would probably never approach them. The whole problem here is that you are being asked to kill yourself. And of course you can't want that. 3 billion years of evolution are pushing their finger on the scale. But we can sucker you into it by having you believe that it won't be real death, but just like an mini "ego-death" -- which your mind can rationalize to itself as being "cool" and "good". But, then one day you will discover much to your shock -- No, we were talking about actual death! But then it will be too late. You will already be dead. And you will be pleased. But not in the way you expect. In other words, we have to use the mind's self-deceptions against itself to escape itself.

B-b-but baby....it wasn't me .... it's alien hand syndrome.... Plus, there is already a significant dogmatic spirituality present, might as well go full on theocratic control over it...right?

@star ark Bicameral Mind theory actually makes sense.. You can also look up 'Alien hand syndrome' 'Alien hand syndrome (AHS) is a condition in which a person experiences their limbs acting seemingly on their own, without control over the actions' There is something called corpus callosum in our brain which connects left brain and right brain. When two hemispheres are surgically separated, it is almost like there are two people in the same body, My left brain can make decisions that my right brain is not aware of and vice versa. Once I read about this, my whole perception of consciousness changed. There are things which are not certain yet. But human beings have a tendency to avoid uncertainty by unconsciously adding their own explanations to fill in the gaps.

Looks like most of the alien entities are targetting the people in the West. I will deal with them if they ever decide to come to East.

You are on the right track... This is the basic criteria for a seeker. People link this with being judgemental.. It is not about being judgemental.. I know these things are traps and totally unnecessary, as far as seeking spiritual enlightenment is concerned.. So this is just a warning in a sincere attempt to help. It is not wrong to be interested in paranormal stuff, UFO's channelling etc.. But there is absolutely no connection between this and spiritual enlightenment. They are actually distractions.. Even if you go through anecdotes and decide to trust just anecdotal stuff, you will still find that all authentic masters discouraged in any interest in paranormal. Go through Patanjali Yoga sutras and he himself says these things are distractions and trap you. Do you need spiritual enlightenment or do you want to fall in love with an alien entity from 500 light years away? You have the choice to choose always! 500 light years is too far away, but your true nature is extremely close... I tend to discourage such discussions as I absolutely know without any doubt that these are distractions and traps for spiritual seekers. But people have their right to get distracted and remain trapped. You have the right to live just like everyone else whose lives are based on beliefs and blind faith alone, no one is stopping. You have the right to delude yourself into thinking that you are highly conscious beings while getting attached to everything that is impermanent and illusory. People have the right to repeat some cliched spiritual quotes to justify what they are doing. No one is forced to consider this serious warning either! It all depends on what you want.

Hi @Alien . I don't see any conflict between photography and Self Actualization work. Photography, as any other form of art, can be done from a place of high consciousness, love, curiosity and intelligence. It becomes a distraction only if you do it for the wrong reasons.

infj laundry list. I acquired a recent obsession with MBTI. Taking this personality test three separate times, I got the same result over and over: INFJ. The rarest, most misunderstood personality type in the world. INFJ males apparently make up 0.4% of the population. Straight INFJ males, probably less. #imaspecialsnowflake #egotrip Why didn't I learn this earlier...?!?! It would have saved me years of misery. Learning about the INFJ personality feels like a spiritual awakening. Looking at my life through this lens explains almost everything about me. It explains why: I feel like an alien Very few people understand me I feel like a walking contradiction I often feel at war with myself due to conflicting desires I am a people pleaser and social chameleon, always have been I can connect with anyone but have very few true friends I used to be addicted to video games I had binge eating issues half a year ago I feel disconnected from my body, ungrounded I've had chronic health issues for years People often mistake me for an extrovert I am often confused because I can envision a million different futures and see the opportunity costs My mind travels a million miles per minute I often get analysis paralysis I love mental masturbation I often get deja vu Life feels dream-like I am highly sensitive to others' feelings and can intuit underlying moods I often know when someone is lying I try not to rock the boat, because saying "no" may hurt the others' feelings, and I have to feel their hurt Until I was eight years old, I cried every day Growing up, my Dad and brother would tell me to "stop crying," or "stop being a little girl," or "grow a pair" As a sensate extrovert, my brother says, "just do it", "stop thinking so much", "what are you so afraid of?" People often criticize me for being "too deep" I feel like my body doesn't cooperate with me I live "upstairs," meaning that most of my "me"-ness resides in the third eye and forehead I am quasi-autistic in front of the opposite sex, because my body feels threatened for its life and shuts down When I finally trust someone, I jump off the deep-end and bear it all, which often scares them away I tend to get severely anxious and severely depressed I gravitate towards nihilism When I say I'll do something, I'll do it I'm extremely disciplined I was a straight-A student in school, without needing to study until college I use lots of metaphors and enjoy puns I gravitate towards holistic systems thinking I like using bullet points I have difficulty expressing myself I've nearly thought myself to death I'm sometimes envious of people like Cypher, who are okay with being ignorant I can't hold a day job for more than six months without going slightly crazy I don't get why people my age go straight into a 9-to-5 career without questioning if they really want to do it or whether it will make them happy I feel like "the system" is not made for my personality I think the conventional route - get a job, get married, have kids, retire - is inherently empty and comes with false promises I feel incapable of providing for a family I want to be like yoda when I grow up I have a hard time being present (1.5 years of daily meditation, and I still can't seem to get in the zone) I am extremely future-oriented I value personal growth highly I quit facebook a year ago I'm overstimulated by bright lights, loud noises, and crowds I hate being the center of attention I can't stand small talk I need time to recharge after social interactions If an activity doesn't align with my higher-consciousness values, I eventually stop doing it People often come to me with their problems People often accuse me of playing the psychologist People often share their deepest secrets with me - even people I barely know Whenever something bad happens in any relationship, I immediately blame myself first I see the potential of a person more than I see the actual person I have a strong urge to help others I am a raging perfectionist who sets unrealistically high standards for myself I am self-aware and admit when I'm wrong I often disappear from the face of the earth for extended periods of time (like right now) I have terrible situational awareness At the same time, I find myself crying of gratitude every other day because of the overwhelming beauty of life I am hell-bent on answering the deep existential questions I feel extreme, tender, compassionate puppy-love towards people and things ever since balancing my fourth chakra I make laundry lists like this, hoping that maybe someone out there will understand, while expecting that the reader will either think "WTF?" or "Too much, man..."

@Alien do what makes you feel happy. Your only on this planet once. I’m sure taking some photos isn’t going to be the end of the world!

@Alien Write two columns on a piece of paper; belief and experienced. Write everything you could ever have any question about in one of those columns. It works well if we are absolutely honest.

@Alien It’s the idea of “you” that is at the root of this. Idea’s are one thing, “I literally don’t exist” is a bucket of minduckery. ?

To me he has a certain look that gives him that guru look. That makes him sort of naturally interesting. He looks like an alien. He's so weird looking he must be wise eh? That's what I think is happening subconsciously with people and why he is as popular as he is. And his personality is strange too.

I recently did a guided meditation that was very reminiscent of that image @Alien . It involved breathing in the positive symbol, and breathing out that negative symbol. It seemed rather silly at first, and then I realized how deeply we are connected to these symbols... and how obvious their meaning is to all. In retrospect, from a non-dual perspective, I guess it's a rather fucked up exercise...but that doesn't negate the fact that I felt great afterwards...lol...

I never even knew Bashar has paid content until you mentioned it. The free content is enough to get the wisdom. Judge the content, not where it's coming from.. Bashar isn't supposed to need money, sure, but the argument is invalid, because it's not Bashar who gets the money, it's Darryl Anka, who is not the supposed alien. Goes to show that you are simply with an agenda to try to discredit the guy. Nothing personal, but that's just how I see it. I can't speak about the crystal's functionality, because I haven't tried it. I can't judge something as correct or incorrect if I haven't tried it. Recently I am led to believe that the world is much more magical than I realise, especially when geometry is concerned. Btw thanks for showing me this vid. I already have attempted to re-draw it, so now I have a permission slip hanging on my wall - for free! I'll keep you updated if something happens