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Yes. It's highlighting the point. The region they come from defines how they act, it doesn't make it healthy. If I had grown up in a city and joined a gang and was still in one I'd be talking to you in a certain way. it wouldn't be healthy for a normal life, but it'd be how I had to be to stay in the gang. We can do the same with anything, jobs, careers, abusive relationships, war-torn countries, poverty. It's still a choice to push one way or the other, no matter what is in front of you. That's often the only choice we get. You can choose in life to divide or to unite. Bring things together or pull them apart. In its simplest form, that's what people do. Act in a fear-based reasoning or the opposite. I will add that things can always get worse. We can do a few scenarios, but the region is unstable, on the present course these come to mind: 1) You can always hate someone more. It's a gradient, in what you are willing to do. People are willing and need to be more hostile towards israel for their own domestic population's expectations, their friends and families are dying. Meaning more aggression against trade routes, borders and sabotaging Israel where they can. (Also against America and the UK for backing them) 2) America keeps going isolationist - BRICS becomes ascendant, and Iran crushes Israel because nobody cares about them anymore. 3) They create 200,000 new suicide bombers. 10% of the Gaza population. There might be many more than that if enough fanatics are grown because of the genocide in other countries or regions. People still talk about the Jewish genocide 80 years later. Do you understand the time scale of these things? We talk about some cultures thousands of years later. 4) Israel's leadership is no longer considered sufficient, it needs to be more militaristic for a population that has come to expect it, and so generates a worse outcome in the region and a wider regional war. 5) Same as above, but with more religious leaning, we get an even more conservative religious government in Israel, making further problems more likely dealing with other faiths, not less. If violence achieves the aim, then violence will be used again. 6) Another country declares war on Israel for slowly starving 2 million people and causing a refugee crisis nearby. - A wider regional war. 7) Sanctions are put on Israel, and the country regresses. I'm favor of this one right now, leveraging it to create a peaceful outcome. 8) You know BRICS are going to use this for decades to hit the west with. In every way you can conceive, and who can blame them? Only China will need to be careful, as they've got plenty of skeletons in their closet. 9) And this one is all but assured. If Israel is allowed to genocide Palestine, it creates opportunities for other countries to do so. Everyone that does it, normalizes it. China has done a fair bit of this in recent decades, which was always banned to talk about, which made the problem hidden and worse. - America invading Iraq the second time, was quoted by Russia and Israel in their own wars as an example. Russia fighting its wars gave central asia the greenlight for their own, it made Turkey and Greece start looking at war again, the same with the Balkans etc. War creates more war. Suffering creates more suffering. You pick to divide or pull things together. - At the moment you are choosing division and suffering, and to hear it from you surprises the hell out of me to be frank.

Also, don’t limit Brahman to human existence or even earthly physics. It is beyond ideas if earth, heaven and hell. Beyond beyond beyond. Shiva’s love would kill you. Brahman is well beyond space and time and the ways it could be would make most humans lose their minds and commit suicide. Ironically, only to realize they cannot. - stay safe and take this comment intelligently. Brahman sits at a super position of the flowers blossoming and it’s rotting. “between the click of the light and the start of the dream” - Arcadefire No Cars Go

For five years, I've been on a journey exploring spirituality. I used to not believe in anything beyond what science could explain, but then I found Leo & he talked about some really interesting ideas, like how there is not a 'self' controlling everything inside us. He also talked about using psychedelics to explore the mind and Reality. Trying mushrooms changed everything for me. It made me realize there's more to reality than just what materialism teaches.. I started meditating & tripping and having these amazing Enlightnment experiences, even connecting deeply with God a couple of times. But when I'm not in a spiritual state, I'm not sure if what i experience is God. I believe it's God but i can't know for sure in this current state. Lately, I've been through some really hellish, horrible & nonsensical experiences that have made me question whether God even exists. It feels like suffering has no reason at all & it's completely senseless & d*mb, and it's hard to see any purpose in it. Why would a wise, all-knowing God let that happen? Why would God let people suffer enormously (rape, torture, crappy situations, health-problems, suicide) for no apparent reason at all? It's not my problem that God allows suffering. My problem is that God allows senseless, Nonsensical suffering that seems to serve no purpose whatsoever. Sort of the suffering you would expect a d*mn mechanical Universe to generate. Suffering that doesn't stop & makes you wanna tear everything to pieces & end your life. It also bothers me that most people (not to mention all the other animals) never get to experience or understand God. And it's not great at all that I only feel close to God when I'm on drugs & i am always confined in this very limited, stupid state. All this seems very depressing and has made feel disillusioned with Leo's work. Nothing makes sense anymore.

Due to his heavy work schedule he did not want to waste time resting and recuperating, and that's why he used sedatives and painkillers. It actually showcases his commitment to his vision and ideals. A yogi can leave his body at will. Yogananda and Lahiri Mahasaya left their bodies at will. It is known as Mahasamadhi (a yogi's conscious exit from the body). If Sadhguru wanted to leave his body he can do so any moment considering his abilities in this regard. He has no need for 'assisted suicide'. There is a tradition of voluntary suicide in eastern religions known as Sallekhana, but this is something that should be attempted only in extreme old age or highly diseased state of an irreversible nature, when there is no other option for healing and attaining proper health . The young and healthy are forbidden from Sallekhana, as it would amount to cowardice and unconscious action on their part.

I'm thinking of starting a journal here. I have many unexpressed/repressed sentiments, and an often burdensome sense of personal space, so this seems like the perfect place to push my boundaries. I was going to name the journal something like "Crisis Mid-life", but I'm planning to extend this beyond any single issue, so a more neutral name was obviously appropriate. Well, I'll get to it, then. I am indeed having a mid-life crisis. I'm at an age, and state of body and mind, that makes it obvious that my youth has passed. Passed me by, actually. I didn't make much of it. I couldn't, with the burdens of what I was given as a child and adolescent. Rather than growing my experiences as a vital young man, my teenage years were spent staring at a ceiling, composing a vindictive suicide note in my head and wishing I'd never been born. My home environment was commensurate to that activity, with a hateful and aggressive step-father, and a mother with her head in the clouds who was unwilling to confront the reality that her husband was bringing ruin to her dreams of a happy home. When I went to college out of state, I was able to discover a new perspective on things, and a new consciousness, but was unable to make this new consciousness my home. I was academically gifted, but lacked a lot in life and communication skills. Furthermore, I had learned unnecessary "skills" for survival in a cruel household and unsympathetic community that further hindered me from making my way. I developed my new consciousness as best I could figure out how, but without supporting skills, my experiments generally led to failure in practical outcomes, and I became cynical and morose. If I hadn't had the financial support of my birth father, an emotionally distant but dutiful man, and his side of the family, I don't know what kind of situation I would have descended into. I'm tired now. Thinking about all this, with the wealth of unhappy unexpressed details and the unhappy knowledge of what comes after, is draining. I think the hardest part, perhaps the one thing that made everything hard, was and is the lack of communication. My mother, who did well as a single parent, stopped listening or wanting to know our situation after remarrying. She had to have known it was bad, but she was so determined that a fantastic vision of happiness in her head had to be reality that she cut off contact with the actual reality of her childrens' suffering. Our community was a conservative rural one where I didn't fit in as an academically oriented and practical-skill disoriented individual. I wasn't ostracized, is simply didn't have any peers who I could share any interests with, not caring about football or farming or small engine repair. One further feature of the community, though not a unique one, was the lack of support for struggling parents, and for children struggling under struggling parents. It was a see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil situation. Never do I remember anyone coming to address my conspicuously severe adolescent depression. I've since become aware that there were people who knew my step-father's nature and our suffering, but were disenabled from any positive action by the relentless indifference of the community. So I had nowhere to say anything. My experience was unwanted. My gifts, though recognized in my letter grades, were otherwise unneeded. In college, I came to accept that I was atheistic, a perspective which which had no place or forum in a conservative Christian community. Anything I would have had to say would have meant confronting everyone with something they didn't need or want. The upshot is that I learned that my kind of communication was a skill with no remunerative value, and anything that doesn't make money is worth as much as the money given to support it; nothing. At best, it can be considered a hobby; otherwise, a disgrace. Hard physical labor is paid for, and praised. Running a business is paid for, and praised. Shilling in a church is supported by donations, and praised. Raising children, while not directly compensated, is given financial support by the community and government, and is praised. So I've, erroneously, come to the conclusion that my skills in finding the truth behind matters and expressing it, are an insignificant hobby. Even writing this, I feel that every word that I say is somehow less significant than when I do productive physical labor at work. I somehow feel that my only value is as an oxen, a large stupid beast of burden who has no unnecessary thoughts. I'll never be able to live happily this way, though. I have to find a way to see past the rejection I've experienced, and assign equally great meaning to my words as I do to the products of capitalism. Perhaps that is what maturity is, is being able to assign as much significance to one's self as to authority and conformity and money. As a child, one prioritizes one's parents. As an adolescent, one prioritizes one's peers. As a young adult, one prioritizes one's livelihood. Generally, at no point is it made clear that one needs to discard anything and everything that hinders the prioritization of one's self-determination. There is no wide-spread institution, formal or informal, for introducing such knowledge. I've lived, if not without the knowledge, then without the determination. I've had the knowledge for nearly two decades. I'm not sure yet what my mistake was in applying that knowledge, whether it has been ignorance or cowardice or self-annihilation. Part of it is probably addiction, addiction to the tool of the internet to support various deleterious habits. The internet its self is not the issue, nor so much are the habits, but rather the combination. Even knowing this, I have trouble maintaining a state of mind where I can imagine a present or future of greater gratification than these addictive behaviors provide. That is my mid-life crisis; I've reached the point where the greatest pleasure I can imagine is the dull and unsatisfying experience of cheap self-gratification. I no can no longer support the youthful enthusiasm that there is something left for me to grasp for. When I was younger, even when I failed, I couldn't help but have hopes for the future. After all, I was still young. Now, having surpassed my physical peak, even if I know better, I can't help but to be bereft of hope. Even if I achieve something, I have no youth left with which to enjoy it. I lost those times. Actually, it feels more like those times were taken from me, by callousness and ignorance and outright malice. I can't help but resent those who never cared what I was losing. I've never been able to communicate with those people. Maybe I've lacked the determination to do so. It's hard to blame myself for being unable to communicate with someone who won't hear what I have to say, but maybe a part of communicating is being able to persevere through rejection, and to maintain confidence in the significance of my own words even when situations where nothing comes of them persist. To be self-determined.

This is just my opinion so don't take it at face value or as something that I know for sure. I think this happens to those who didn't allow for the mental pain to surface, didn't give it recognition, didn't allow for the energy to breathe - so-to-speak. It was there crying out but was ignored. The suicidal energy. Energy that wasn't nurtured or paid attention to. So it died. Went extinct. As when you don't water a flower and it withers away. When people voice their suicidal tendencies or seek help, or become sad, or tell someone, or write about it or acknowledge it in some way or express it, that is giving it life so it lives on. That's why we can be suicidal for years and nothing happens. We have given the energy life. It is when it is suppressed that it suffocates and dies. It commits suicide like a suicidal cell in the body. When you don't see a human, but something in energetic form, that's what you see, not a person that committed suicide but a an energetic form that couldn't survive without love and attention and transforms into something else. Again that's just my take on these circumstances and I look at everything that way. Energetic forms. I don't see the human I see energy in form.

He was in such incredible pain that none of his techniques would suffice and he needed the help of science and technology. He was in such incredible pain that even he couldn't bear it. This should enlighten everyone as to why it is compassionate to allow assisted suicide at times because there's only so much anyone can bear, regardless of there level of mental discipline.

In 2021, the age-adjusted suicide rate in the United States was 14.04 per 100,000 people, which is a 16% increase from 2011. In 2021, 48,183 Americans died by suicide, which is a 3.6% increase from 2020. The suicide rate among males in 2021 was 22.8 per 100,000, which is four times higher than among females (5.7 per 100,000). Spiritual Communities have the same issues that non Spiritual communities have. Why? Because you cannot separate people who are into Spirituality from people who aren't. Human issues are human issues. Majority of people in Spirituality are not advanced, just like majority of people who play sports are not world-class professionals. As such the same problems that stop a non world class professional from advancing to a higher expression of said practice are the same issues that stop someone from advancing Spiritually. There is nothing inherently wrong with Spiritual communities, there are just issues that the people in those communities have not worked out yet. How do we know this? Put a collection of mystics together and you have peace and tranquility. See how easy that is? Why label non advanced problematic people who enter Spirituality and start communities as Spiritual Communities. I wouldn't call them Spiritual Communities. I would call them Communities that are early in their practice of Spirituality. Calling them Spiritual is like calling a bunch of Junior Varsity players who created their own league of basketball, a professional league. Profession has standards of performance. A Spiritual Community with proper development would be harmonious. If you study reality, it teaches you that the more intelligent something is, the better it is able to unionize, synchronize, large groups. Spirituality is the study of the interconnectedness of everything. It is all encompassing. Which means in essence it is the study of unionization. Oneness. If you see high amounts of dysfunctionality then they aren't Spiritual. It's why there is a saying "You will know them by their fruits." https://biblehub.com/matthew/7-16.htm

I don't mean to be insensitive towards suicide. . . But I wouldn't be surprised if Mr. Beast kills himself at some point. If he does, he'll become a case study for years to come.

I don't know what made me write this. But I write it with a heavy heart. Like any other thing that comes with it's own set of pros and cons, spiritual communities aren't exempt from drawbacks either. I'm not specifically talking about forums although forums are a fraction of it. I'm just saying communities in general. I have reached a point where I'm seriously contemplating whether being a part of a larger community is really worth it if the results aren't really there and if things are just getting worse with the illusion that you're on a spiritual path and you are achieving something when in reality millions of people with mental and physical problems turn to spirituality only for bypassing their real issues, are barely able to cope through life and end up being and doing worse when they get on the spiritual path. They start to rot and lose interest in life and daily activities once they begin to live in a solipsistic bubble. Instead of thriving, they start rapidly degrading. The consequences can be anywhere from suicide to mental illness to death or just living like a zombie. I'm sure people in the past have also expressed such a sentiment on this forum before. It's a routine thing, not to mention the problem of false teachings. Things that degrade your mental well being or just take you on a path of disillusionment. You gotta do the math yourself. Are you in this for the better or are things genuinely not turning out to be the way they should. I was barely 9 years old when I first started with spirituality. I haven't come very far because life came in between. I devoted a significant portion of my life in chasing delusions (let's put it that way). I suffered autism at a young age and in my teens I was obsessed with spirituality and religion. I always thought I was looking for something, searching for something, there was this existential crisis like thing going on with me. I was often at my wits end. Don't get me wrong. I derived a lot of benefit from this forum itself. Leo's teachings, his videos on personal development were a great starting point. But there's a problem. Everything is not so hunky dory. I still think that I suffered a bit in the process and not in a good way. It's like "invited" suffering. I don't know if this is the inherent nature of spiritual work. But I went through phases of insanity. I didn't do psychedelics (God only knows what suffering might have resulted from that). But so far not so stellar results. I have significant mental illness. I don't know if that's interfering with my spiritual stuff. One thing I casually noticed in spiritual communities is the huge problem of spiritual ego. People fight a lot over what's right or wrong. There's a certain dogmatism that accompanies it. This downgrades the whole spiritual process significantly. This is not alien to any community, it's to be found in every spiritual community. Be careful with what you decide to put your energy into. I have suffered significantly.

I don't know what made me write this. But I write it with a heavy heart. Like any other thing that comes with it's own set of pros and cons, spiritual communities aren't exempt from drawbacks either. I'm not specifically talking about forums although forums are a fraction of it. I'm just saying communities in general. I have reached a point where I'm seriously contemplating whether being a part of a larger community is really worth it if the results aren't really there and if things are just getting worse with the illusion that you're on a spiritual path and you are achieving something when in reality millions of people with mental and physical problems turn to spirituality only for bypassing their real issues, are barely able to cope through life and end up being and doing worse when they get on the spiritual path. They start to rot and lose interest in life and daily activities once they begin to live in a solipsistic bubble. Instead of thriving, they start rapidly degrading. The consequences can be anywhere from suicide to mental illness to death or just living like a zombie. It's a routine thing, not to mention the problem of false teachings. Things that degrade your mental well being or just take you on a path of disillusionment. You gotta do the math yourself. Are you in this for the better or are things genuinely not turning out to be the way they should. I was barely 9 years old when I first started with spirituality. I haven't come very far because life came in between. I devoted a significant portion of my life in chasing delusions (let's put it that way). I suffered autism at a young age and in my teens I was obsessed with spirituality and religion. I always thought I was looking for something, searching for something, there was this existential crisis like thing going on with me. I was often at my wits end. Don't get me wrong. But there's a problem. Everything is not so hunky dory. I still think that I suffered a bit in the process and not in a good way. It's like "invited" suffering. I don't know if this is the inherent nature of spiritual work. But I went through phases of insanity. I didn't do psychedelics (God only knows what suffering might have resulted from that). But so far not so stellar results. I have significant mental illness. I don't know if that's interfering with my spiritual stuff. One thing I casually noticed in spiritual communities is the huge problem of spiritual ego. People fight a lot over what's right or wrong. There's a certain dogmatism that accompanies it. This downgrades the whole spiritual process significantly. This is not alien to any community, it's to be found in every spiritual community. Be careful with what you decide to put your energy into. I have suffered significantly.

I don't know what made me write this. But I write it with a heavy heart. Like any other thing that comes with it's own set of pros and cons, spiritual communities aren't exempt from drawbacks either. I'm not specifically talking about forums although forums are a fraction of it. I'm just saying communities in general. I have reached a point where I'm seriously contemplating whether being a part of a larger community is really worth it if the results aren't really there and if things are just getting worse with the illusion that you're on a spiritual path and you are achieving something when in reality millions of people with mental and physical problems turn to spirituality only for bypassing their real issues, are barely able to cope through life and end up being and doing worse when they get on the spiritual path. They start to rot and lose interest in life and daily activities once they begin to live in a solipsistic bubble. Instead of thriving, they start rapidly degrading. The consequences can be anywhere from suicide to mental illness to death or just living like a zombie. I'm sure people in the past have also expressed such a sentiment on this forum before. It's a routine thing, not to mention the problem of false teachings. Things that degrade your mental well being or just take you on a path of disillusionment. You gotta do the math yourself. Are you in this for the better or are things genuinely not turning out to be the way they should. I was barely 9 years old when I first started with spirituality. I haven't come very far because life came in between. I devoted a significant portion of my life in chasing delusions (let's put it that way). I suffered autism at a young age and in my teens I was obsessed with spirituality and religion. I always thought I was looking for something, searching for something, there was this existential crisis like thing going on with me. I was often at my wits end. Don't get me wrong. I derived a lot of benefit from this forum itself. Leo's teachings, his videos on personal development were a great starting point. But there's a problem. Everything is not so hunky dory. I still think that I suffered a bit in the process and not in a good way. It's like "invited" suffering. I don't know if this is the inherent nature of spiritual work. But I went through phases of insanity. I didn't do psychedelics (God only knows what suffering might have resulted from that). But so far not so stellar results. I have significant mental illness. I don't know if that's interfering with my spiritual stuff. One thing I casually noticed in spiritual communities is the huge problem of spiritual ego. People fight a lot over what's right or wrong. There's a certain dogmatism that accompanies it. This downgrades the whole spiritual process significantly. This is not alien to any community, it's to be found in every spiritual community. Be careful with what you decide to put your energy into. I have suffered significantly.

1. The suicide as a method started then but the explosions (without suicide) attacks of Palestinians against Israeli civilians started long before that. 2. hamas and fatah are both responsible since 90s. 3. You will have to add examples of such intentional "massacares" of civilians (not terrorists).

1. The suicide bombings began after the first intifada, they were a response to Israeli occupation and violence. H 2. hamas haven’t claimed responsibility for a suicide bombing since 2008 The Israel military has engaged in many massacres of civilians long before Hamas was even founded.

This is a low intensity war against hamas in the west bank since 2002 until this day, the only thing that stopped the suicide bombers came from there. No massacares at all. You conflated civilians with hamas.

Agreed. But it is a weird paradox. I was too arrogant to heed any warning about psychedelics. I needed to get "calibrated" to reality and awakening. Each person has to learn the hard way. You gotta touch the fire and get burned. It is the Dunning-Kruger effect. You have to learn the limits of your body, mind, spirit, soul, etc. It is dangerous and scary. I really respect Leo for mentioning the risk of suicide in a few videos. Heavy stuff and heady stuff. Very strange. Advice falls on deaf ears.

@Karmadhi Yes, and I'd also say opportunist as well as experienced in knowing how to market public outrage just enough to stay relevant, especially with him doing podcasts around YouTube is concerning. Even lately in his Twitter recently been joking about suicide and dehumanizing a few people and those who lean more pro Palestine. I don't know how he's getting away with that much hage speech in Twitter. And yes he doesn't want further war in Ukraine and Russia, but even in that it's clear the American and western bias is playing oht through him, plus him even being defamatory to John Mearsheimer without even engaging in his arguments is already telling.

This is all correct, except one thing. When you suicide or kill yourself somehow in a crash for example you don't necessarily wake up as god. That is because you didnt die as god realized but still as an ego mind, ego mind will associate death with darkness. And since you're nothingness , anything is possible. When you jump from your roof as ego and not as a god realized being, you will keep falling when you're close to the ground you won't touch it but just will have a black screen because of the shock. Then after the nothingness/blackness you might become aware in a new childs body, the big bang is a start of your rebirth/new awareness in your world. She got a taste of god or herself and knew she did it billions of times and wished for rebirth/new life. BUT A KNEW LIFE OR EGO BODY ISNT AS EASY TO GET AS YOU MIGHT THINK, YOU'RE NOTHINGNESS SO BEING ENTRAPPED AND FORGOTTEN IN ANOTHER DREAM ISNT AS EASY AS YOU MIGHT THINK. From what i know and understand the only way to get a new random body/ego/dream is to wish for death/kill yourself/non existence. It's basically a gods restart button to get lost somewhere. The others while you're in a ego body are just projections/reflections of your mind because you're aware. So you're truely only one and all alone. The problem is when you're all alone, the desires/meaning/things all will have 0 value for you. The only true meaning that you already know will be loving others. So a restart of your dream / being reborn into delusion and unknowingness will be your only option.

Reminds me of the paradox regarding suicide. For example, in my religious upbringing we were taught that suicide is sinful, so we never discussed about it openly. But from a mental health perspective, it is healthy to discuss suicide instead of avoiding it. So yeah, you don’t understand suffering by avoiding suffering.

So basically, the question is null and void in your opinion because there is nothing wrong with suicide. Actually suicide is Enlightnement, because reality is consciousness, so there is no death, really. That's a very interesting take and actually it's quite correct. I just think it would be cooler if God could realize itself without just ending the life of the form and never knowing it was God. But what I think happens here is Consciousness. Rats don't wake up - they go through their whole life, and never awaken. So why would some humans awaken, if there level of consciousness wasn't high enough. And now again - solipsism wipes this all clean.

Hmmm. Now that I think of it maybe suffering is not enough. Maybe it's something like being fed up with one's current way of being. Maybe Being fed up/will to change = amount of suffering * insight/inteligence Because for some people change is so scary that it actually in a way is more comfortable to stay in current way of being. Massaro says that if you don't change some behaviour it's because deep inside you still believe there is a benefit to that behaviour. Like for example some can subconsciously believe thst staying asleep and in suffering maybe is terrible but it ensures things like security, being understood and so on. So until the benefits of change outweight the scary parts like not being understood, going crazy - the person won't change. And for some it may be that not being understood, being alone, changing is scarier even than death. Also commiting suicide is just ego screaming for help. Sending a signal "look how much I suffered because od you world, so much that I'm going to kill myself".

Excactly. But still - i still wonder why some who suffer so deep don't awaken. - They commit suicide. I don't understand. Maybe Leo will put a video out on this - i mean, he's the genius. But I just wonder why some awaken via suffering and some don't. Maybe they never got exposed to spirituality or maybe their mind just didn't expand enough.

This guy shows how extremist Islam can get. They don’t value their life. They invented the suicide bombers. It’s insane how insane religion can get you. Stop enabling and support this sh1t..

I might come back here and give some actual constructive criticism and nuances another time, but after trying (primarily Leo's advice from that 3 part series for a few months now) I just want to say that it's true Leo's perception has been distorted by living in Vegas and hanging out with PUAs. It's super different in other places in the world and even in the US there are few places where I would recommend taking Leo's advice word for word, although I would highly recommend it if your sole objective is improving your social skills and you had little to no investment in getting laid. For newcomers (i.e. anyone who hasn't been doing it for years) hardcore game is not a short-term strategy for getting laid unless you're a very good looking guy, just keep that in mind. At any rate, I just found out that apparently where I live, some white college kids might ask an older man to intimidate and coerce you to leave a bar after you approached and talked to their friends. I had no fucking impression I made anyone uncomfortable until this fucking old guy pulled me to the side and claimed to be a police officer. If I was thinking clearly I could've called the actual police right then and there. Instead I called suicide hotlines hours later. I'll just leave it at that.

lol. I chuckled at this.. All depends on your priorities.. the cost of living in those cities are way too high for someone like me to be "worthwhile", it would literally be financial suicide for me. And bigger doesn't always mean better.. you can be in a very big city that is very misaligned in your values. I've lived in some densely populated cities and did not like them at all, people tend to be more "robotic" and superficial (tho I don't know much about NYC or London in particular). Even if I was loaded financially I still don't desire to live in giant cities.. so I just say do your research if you can. And well tbh if you reach a certain "state of consciousness" it doesn't matter as much where you live so long as it's peaceful and affordable. Thanks to the internet for instance.