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@Leo Gura what if the experience you got so far including mind exploration & dmt never showed you any truth. you deluded yourself, believing love feeling as hard as the deluded here never existed. Maybe what you're looking for has to be drop to be found. what if you could be in bliss all the day, all the time, and without any drugs. like having only experience with people as high in truth as you are ? just idea, go find out.

Hello :-) I am new here and I want to introduce myself a bit. I was always interested in psychology (and also worked in a closed field and went to quite a lot of training in this field and also read a lot). I always wanted to understand why people behave the way they do. But as years went by I sensed it is kind of going in circles, if the reason for suffering were pure psychological, why can't psychology find a solution? So after searching for a while (not even knowing what I was looking for) I endet up in non duality. Read a lot of books, saw a lot of youtube videos, went to a lot of reatreats.... And after going to the retreats I experienced a kind of shift in myself. But I guess it was not really an awakening. But it was a kind of dumbness and dullness (I usually think a lot), I had the impression that my thoughts got less and kind of much ...slower (and I used to be a quick thinker). Also, I felt there was a real heart opening, a kind of love to everything and everyone. I deeply felt (!) connection. I got really a bit blissed out, I was kind of happy all the time. Sometimes people even ask me what kind of drug I am taking. ;-) So, but then I got triggered and painfully hurt and the bliss dissapeard with also that kind of strong feeling of connection. So I wonder if somebody experienced somthing similar and what that was exactly? And I also wonder at the moment how to continue? It feels like I was thrown back in an old state which doesnt seem to fit anymore.

Last night I dreamed that I was swimming in a hot spring in this desert setting and Leo was there. I was surprised and in wonder of it, and he explained how it worked even though in real life I know how hot springs work and have alwasy wanted to go to one. Under the water was the foundation of some old building. I was amazed by how warm the water was, and grateful. Then it started changing. I started to notice all kinds of dirt in the water, and it got dirty and disgusting as stuff grew in the waters that were getting warmer and warmer as summer came closer. I told Leo that we should move. It was almost warm enough to swim and to the right, somehow, magically, was the swimming hole at the river where my mystical experiences started. Yesterday I went there and thought about swimming, but it would be a Wim Hof type experience. Then I thought about how awakening has given me the courage to do what I never would have done. The dream changed and what the building had been turned into a mystery we really wanted to solve. It made me feel like the start of digging up the history of Dr.P. That sense of mystery. It was huge and spectacular and... had something to do with ice cream. WTF with the ice cream dreams? What does ice cream symbolize? I'm trying out going vegan. An entire shelf fell out of the fridge door and spilled yogurts all over the floor just now. There were lots of reactions and insights and feelings from Leo's latest video. When he said towards the end, how do you know you're done, what if there's a level beyond and a level beyond, my mind went immediately to gambling. We don't think our thoughts. We are susceptible to our surroundings until we purify/discover ourselves. That's why people long after solitude for this work. If you are what you eat, if diet is so important to spirituality, then does it make sense that we would ignore our surroundings? Or that they would be just as important? As the inner so the outer, as above so below, is within so without. It's a fractal universe. My friend sent me this message a week or so ago. "Did you know that the GI tract can be considered OUTSIDE THE HUMAN BODY because it is just hole that passes all the way through? Watching Ask a Mortician while doing dishes and thought you'd like to know." You are a vortex, a whirpool, spiral as Rupert Spira so elegantly describes. His words just makes me want to curl up and die in the bliss. I digress. There's nothing in the center, like the metaphor that came in the vision of light, of source, you are that but also this stuff swirling around. You are, verily I say unto you, a toilet bowl ever flushing. Beautiful isn't it? You are what you eat. You are the people you hang around. You are what you give your attention to. Garbage in, garbage out. Also you are not. You transcend all that, you're already pure, you're the calm eye of the storm at the center of the spiral. If you greatly honor food choices and spiritual shouldn't we greatly honor where we choose to live? Ramana Maharshi worshiped a place. It's beyond worship, it's dissolving, becoming. "The Maharshi called Arunachala the spiritual Heart of the world. Aruna, which means ‘red, bright like fire’, does not signify the mere fire that gives off heat. Rather, it means Jnanagni, the Fire of Wisdom, which is neither hot nor cold. Achala signifies hill. Thus, Arunachala means ‘Hill of Wisdom’." https://www.sriramanamaharshi.org/arunachala-hill/ I don't believe in taking this too far, just like with diet. There's a careful balance of neither worshiping nor demonizing the choices we make, of not prejudging alignment and locking it in via the mind in an effort to avoid feeling, sensing, intuiting our way to true alignment. I've tried to let go of this feeling, thinking it's crazy and not wanting to think about it too much because it has such pull, but it keeps coming back. The metaphor of water and whirlpools doesn't stop appearing and connecting. Last night I had an impulse to look through my memory box and I found a project I made years ago. It's a tiny vase, a vessel that's made of blooming flowers on a watery background. Dr.P had a large Rebecca at the well sculpture surrounded by a fountain and at the talk on him an old man recalled memories and said how they never were able to get a well dug at his mansion. There was no water on that hill. It's ironic.

On April 5th 2020 at around 11:00 PM I had an experience that changed the way I perceive life and an experience that I will remember for the rest of my life. I had a nondual experience unlike any other I’ve ever had before. It was an experience of Infinite Love, complete and total Infinite Love. Recently I have been thinking about and meditating on the areas of being, manifestation, suffering and love. In the days leading up to this experience I have had an increased feeling of calmness, freedom and intense mindfulness. Despite the external appearances of my personal life currently as well as the current affairs of the world right now I feel more free and calm than I ever have in my life. It all feels quite ineffable. On this particular night I could feel the intensity and depth of the mindfulness I was experiencing. It was a depth, calmness and present moment awareness that I have noticed always precedes my past spontaneous nondual experiences. At the time I was listening to my favorite ambient song and taking in the profound beauty of it. While I was mindfully listening something happened. In an instant everything in my experience of reality just collapsed down into a singularity the experience of perceiving time ceased and I was overwhelmed by a massive torrent of Nondual Universal Love. I began crying and this crying quickly grew to sobbing as my perception expanded almost instantaneously into everything in all of existence. I was everything that ever was, is and will be. I was all of it. However there was no experience of I the self was obliterated the moment this infinite love overwhelmed my being. I have had several nondual and psychedelic experiences on my journey thus far but this time there was an incomprehensibly large flood of ultimate Universal Love like a transdimensional dam had burst and a flood of love from the totality of all existence itself completely engulfed my being. This Love was so much, so powerful that human language entirely and completely fails to describe the absolutely profound level and depth it had. I immediately knew that existence is Love. I saw the ever present nondual beauty of everything from this state of overwhelming Love. I felt so much love flowing through my being that I felt was melting. Everything that constituted any sense of separation was melting. All I could do in the presence of this Infinite Love was cry in its infinite beauty. Tears of sheer joy and love streamed down my face as I had never felt love so intensely before. I could feel this energetically affecting my physical body on multiple levels, subatomic, atomic, molecular and so on. The feeling of melting away from the intensity of infinite love was ever present. More and more all forms of individuation were melting away. It was as if the Infinite Love of all of creation was a red hypergiant star and that my individuated ego and body instantly melted into disintegration when coming even into contact with this profound absolute Love. It was the most profound thing I have ever experienced in my life. Out of all of the nondual and psychedelic experiences that I have had I’ve never felt such profound Love like this. As I was totally enraptured by this experience I felt the love that a mother feels for her newborn child, the love that the earth has for all of the lifeforms on it, the love of the fabric of existence itself. I felt love that I would instantly sacrifice my physical life for and even beyond that. Love beyond what I thought was ever possible and still that love bloomed and became even more intense. It was an infinite absolutely unconditional love for everything; for all beings, for all phenomena in existence. As I looked at the room around me I noticed the objects around and I was one with everything. I was on an existential level no different from the bed, the walls, the clothes, the air in the room, the carpet, the dirt on the carpet, the computer. In the binding unity of love I was everything in all of existence without exception. I picked up one of my shirts nearby and folded it up and I held it and hugged it as if it was a baby. As if it was my baby, my child because really all of existence is just that. I felt and exuded this love more intensely than I can put into words. There was a pillow nearby and I picked it up as well and I held it with all of the Love that I could muster. And still the perceiver of the experience was totally melting in contact with this infinite and profound love. The intensity of the experience got to the point where I felt that my body began vibrating. And I felt this very strange and intense feeling of vibration specifically from my heart area. This strange pulsating vibration branched out from my heart across my entire chest, neck, shoulders, my upper abdominal area and upper back. This pulsating vibration was so strange to feel going through my body. With every breath this pulsating vibration expanded more and more through my body. The intensity of this Love was so great that I didn’t know how I could possibly take anymore, however it continued to expand and even further more engulf me even though there was no me left. As this continued there was the overwhelming feeling of gratitude and reverence that arose as well. I totally embraced obliteration by love and totally gave into the massive tsunami of universal love. The feeling of reverence was too much for words. Tears continued to stream down my face. The pulsating vibrations I felt in my body became even more intense as I placed my hands on my heart I just wanted to open my chest and blast out Love everywhere infinitely. I am not too knowledgeable on the chakra system about how energy flows through it but I feel that that in this experience I had a powerful heart chakra opening. With each heartbeat and each breath I felt my entire being vibrate and reverberate with Love. There is just pure Love. I came into a state of awe for the enormous love which always emanates through the totality. I just began to say, “wow”, over and over again. Followed by; “this is too much”, over and over again. The level of love that existence is and has for all incarnations is so profound that I don’t think we’ll ever have a way of describing it. You just have to directly experience it to know. As I was fully embraced by the infinite Love of existence I grabbed a blanket and I just wept uncontrollably into it. This went on for what felt like a while. I wept into it from the existential bliss, the existential joy and the sheer incomprehensible amount of love that I was experiencing. And I realized that the substance of existence is Love; that without love that nothing and I mean nothing could exist. Nothing could exist without love. You and I are love. We are love incarnate. We are a love that is so profound that when we know ourselves it’s the most amazing and beautiful thing that you could experience. The peak of this experience lasted for about an hour. For the rest of the night through sleep and into the next day I was in the afterglow of experiencing the profound infinity of love that constitutes all of existence. I had the realization that everything we beings do in life without exception, we do for love in one way or another and it is expressed in a spectrum of countless ways. This is the first time in life that I have experienced the Love of reality as it actually is; pure nondual infinite Love beyond the illusion of individuated ego experience. Love that will obliterate you because it’s just so much, Love that will break you down and make you cry, make you sob intensely. A part of my being is fully awake now. I feel energetically different than before that experience. I feel energetically different now, as if I am a different person from before this experience. Experiencing that level of Love permeates every aspect of our being and our experience. One realization I had was that my entire life up until this experience I thought that suffering was bad. Now I know what suffering is. Suffering is what happens when we knowingly or unknowingly turn away from Love. Because a person who truly understands Love, a person who truly loves themselves would never turn away from Love whether it be the Love of existence itself, the Love of another being, or Love of themselves. The only reason truly that we suffer individually and collectively is turning away from Love, that’s it. And that can breed many other things as a result but fundamentally it’s very simple. If you turn away from Love you turn away from what you truly are and when you turn away from what you truly are you’re out of alignment with the loving flow of the totality of existence and when you’re out of alignment with the loving flow of existence itself; it is so painful. That is when our experience becomes suffering. And we don’t have to suffer. What would serve us best in this life is to constantly and consistently choose Love at every second of every day. Forever. To choose whatever is the highest expression of love. And bask in its radiance and live in this place for our entire time of incarnation. I felt true freedom in this experience. True freedom. Love is the substance of existence. Love is what you are. There is never ever anything to fear. There is never ever anything to fear. There is never ever anything to be afraid of. Just Love. Just be Love. Just choose Love every single time. Because that is what existence is built upon. That is what existence is. It only hurts when you turn away from love. But if you dive completely into love and totally melt into that experience of being love you will truly know and experience what you are, what the universe is, what God is and that will change every aspect of how you look at life, on the deepest level in every way and thusly change your experience of being forever. I Love you, whoever you are, for we are One. I want to thank @fridakaia for helping me so much to truly understand what Love is. She is a beautiful and profound being and a lightworker. I also want to thank @Consilience for encouraging me to dive more deeply into Love on my journey.

@ivory I've long seen through the thin Vail of the illusory nature of the world, pleasure, materialism, comfort. The More I move in the world, the more i engage with life the stronger the sense of illusion becomes. The illusion of self becomes more apparent. Emphahsised as a byproduct of practice and the events of life that bash the ego. Ying and yang, order and chaos, ego grind and bliss. The dark night sounds like a significant ego death, followed by a breakthrough awakening. Plus, it sounds like the title of a blockbuster movie.

@Spence94 It sucks going through the phase of "the dark night of the soul", but once you go through it bliss comes

These quotes seem very relevant to what Leo described. I figured I'd just post them here as well. They primarily describe the transition from the 500's (Love) to the 600's (Enlightenment, bliss, formlessness) on the Map of Consciousness. Interestingly, about 50% of people choose to leave the body upon entering the 600's, like Leo seemingly had the option to do. "Enlightenment proper, that is, the replacement of duality with nonduality, calibrates at 600 or over. We could say that any calibration of 600 or more formally denotes enlightenment. At about the calibrated level of 600, bliss intervenes and worldly activity stops, sometimes permanently. If the person is destined to remain in the world, this state is said to ‘ripen’, and there is a slow return of the capacity to function. Some enlightened ‘persons’ retreat to spiritual practice and meditation and evolve into the 700s. At that level, the world as commonly described is no longer a self-existent reality. There are neither separate persons nor a world that needs saving. All is evolving according to Divine Will. The world is surrendered to God, and its destiny is self-fulfilling. No intervention is necessary. All life is the evolution of consciousness and the unfolding of Creation. [...] Only pure consciousness devoid of content can pass through the barriers of perception and become the clear water beyond the screen. When it is said that no person can be enlightened, it means that personhood is filtered out by the screening and cannot pass beyond it. (This statement calibrates at 600.) Q: What does it mean to go into a bliss state? What does one do? What happens? A: To be dissolved into intense, infinite love is overwhelming and incapacitating. There is neither the desire nor the capability to emerge from that state unaided. All bodily functions cease. Even breathing itself may cease and resume only in response to an entreaty from another person who is intensely loving. However, it is not necessary to do so. One has permission by knowingness to leave the body as an option. In this case, in order to acknowledge love, breathing resumed. Perhaps it was decided by karma. However, the choice was also made with the concurrent awareness that any return to physicality was only temporary and the final dissolution back into Infinite Love was inevitable and certain. Compared to the eternity of that infinite state, a short return to the realm of physicality seemed trivial. Q: What if there was nobody around to entreat one to return to worldly life? A: Whether or not those conditions prevail probably depends on karma, circumstances, conditions, Divine Will, and the interaction of the universe as a totality. If there were no entreaties, then the body would expire, which at the time would be quite agreeable. When Ramana Maharshi went into that bliss state spontaneously, he was not discovered for some lengthy period by which time he had been severely bitten by many insects and had been without sustenance for an unknown number of days. He was entreated to drink and eat. He responded slowly and eventually resumed movement and function; however, he did not speak in language for another two years. Q: Does the sense of self disappear? After all, the ego fears death. A: When the self dissolves into the Self, it is experienced as a great expansion from limited, transitory, and vulnerable to immortal, infinite Allness that transcends all worlds and universes. As such, the Self is not subject to death or birth, as it exists beyond temporality. The obscurity of the Self was the result of merely misidentifying perception as representing all Reality. [...] The EEG of the enlightened sage is dominated by slow Theta waves (4–7 cycles per sec.), which make functioning in the ordinary world quite difficult. In that state, the option to leave the world at any time persists and is a permanent, open option as though it was part of a silent agreement or knowingness. There is no obligation to persist or continue. Q: How then does earthly life resume? A: After a period of years, adjustment is made with the relearning of communication styles and a reacquaintance with human affairs sufficient to function. Recent history had to be caught up on. This can be accomplished by getting a television, watching the news reports, and reading newspaper headlines. There is an ongoing dialog within the overall field of human consciousness that is as though transparent by its essence; and by recognition, it offers aspects with which one has an option to respond." Hawkins, David R.. The Eye of the I . Hay House. Kindle Edition.

In this state there was no concept of body anymore. Only god bathing in its bliss and infinite intelligence flowing. What my point in the post was that the resistance was an integral part of God. Resistance would show up and get showered by love and surrender over and over again for infinity. Mahasamdhi is totally unknown, you dont actually know what it is, how could you?

@Meta-Man whatever. have a good time waking up people from nothing ps : I m living in pure bliss.

Thanks a lot all. That was intimate. The Video, was the first time I experienced, that ego is god and ego helps me to find to raw love. There were a lot of situations like this: An urging feeling to stop my spiritual thinking and behaviour, to really help and love others and reality. This feeling was always occuring when I got deep stepped in into love for myself, have the clearest experience of love. But always my reality holds me back by my ego, that told me that it's harmful. But this was just the reality-other-I-merging on and on. I experiencing it slightly more often by changing state of consciousness, especially by transcending emotions fully god-centered. The more I'm stepping into the natural flow and let it fully happen, the more everything else goes with me, going fully frustated or going full bliss. That is such a great imagination. - always swinging to both opposites in slightly clearer and clearer rhythm, fully engaged. Thanks a lot to all.

@Leo Gura don't pull out prematurely Leo... nobody really knows what's going to happen we just pretend like we do. That's the mystery that's the Wonder... looking at the world again with childlike eyes and splendor. Maybe your next adventure will be a radical shift... but nothing has to end, maybe you will move to somewhere new, start something different, change up your videos, maybe if the search is given up the answer will appear.( "when the student is ready the master appears") Nothing ever promised us this crazy ball and chain trip was going to be perfect peace and Bliss... love hate fear suffering anger boredom happiness joy anguish sorrow fulfillment. It's all IT...it's all WHATS HAPPENING!! Creativity is like God's porn and you've got way too much of it to be pullin out prematurely. Maybe take it easy on the seeking and start basking in the Indescribable mystery of what's already here... it's f****** incredible... I'm only 5 hours away from Vegas don't make me drive over there and give you a bear hug from the US Navy. ? We love you way too much brother!! thanks for everything seriously. ❤

Things that I don't like doing: exercise, studying, diet adjustment, consciousness work Things I do like: getting built as fuck, getting smart/wise as fuck, looking good as fuck and I dunno...I guess I don't mind entering a state of super-knowledge and transcendental perpetual bliss with actual eternal life lol. I like that. ?

When you wake up from a dream you feel relief and are shaking off confusion. Awakening is clarity so powerful you'll laugh and cry hysterically in bliss. Maybe the relief (joy) is as a powerful as the strength of the confusion (suffering) that is seen through.

@Potential of course you must take the advise offered by the above people follow the mastery mindset have a vision follow your purpose or do whatever you find happiness/bliss/joy/flow/passion in. For emotions I suggest you welcome every emotion and observe it allowing and being aware of emotions is a very powerful way to deal with emotions. Also journalling is a very effective way in the long run.. consider making a common place journal it's super powerful I wish I new about this in school... Try setting your mood to feel bettwr this is a underestimated technique I hear no one talking about, I read this in the book the magic of thinking big where the author says that your mind is a thought producing machine and one though leads to another so if that is the case why don't we set good thoughts in our mind first thing in the morning the rest can be a domino effect. I encourage you to try out these techniques as even one thing you follow can change your life for the better.

@bejapuskas Alright, for example on one of my most profound experiences with psilocybin mushrooms I went into the trip feeling that I had fully let go of my personal desires and would let the substance take over. However early on in the trip as my conscious awareness began to leave this physical realm I was still holding onto the desire for knowledge, the desire to understand, the desire to get something from the experience and bring it back with me. I had so many questions. The psilocybin however quickly taught me how to let go fully by summoning hundreds of demons around me that ripped me apart and ate me piece by piece in the psychedelic realm. It was terrifying to say the least. But quite quickly I accepted that there was nothing that I could do and that I was going to die, and I was ok with that. As soon as this happened the demons were transformed into a sea of infinite bliss. Later in that same trip I visited an infinite library of love and light containing all of the knowledge in the multiverse known as the Akashic Records. It was one of the most beautiful things I have ever experienced and I will remember that experience for the rest of my life. So to sum it up I was taught how to truly let go and my appreciation for knowledge was met in this trip; I would have never been able to experience the Akashic Records if I did not give up my grasping desire for knowledge. After this psychedelic experience my life was changed forever.

Nothing wrong with it. The ego can turn against itself, and that is where it becomes a problem to itself. Total ignorance is bliss, to a degree. Being aware of something beyond the ego can be a nightmare for the individual. Suddenly you're resisting the egoic energy, which creates more. You're now in your own trap, your own loop, trying to get out fuels it, trying to let it be fuels it (because it is a subtle way of trying to get out). There is nothing you can do, it's just happening for no one. Realise that and it will run its course and not stick.

Consciousness is of course you, and infinite. What is infinite can not lose nor gain. You, consciousness, is the experience of this, but also is fooled by the experience. When you believe consciousness, awareness, is something other than you, it seems there are levels of “it” in relation to ‘you’.. Precisely as there are not-two, you are not actually experiencing high & low awareness. Intelligence in the body is experienced (ah ha’s), then the claiming of it occurs again, via the fore mentioned dualistic belief. Consciousness creates (is) experience, of itself, by itself, for itself, and thus veils itself with it self, as the activity of thinking. “Super self conscious” would be no mind, samadhi, rather than self referential thinking. Consider self=consciousness, rather than a separate self who is “self conscious”. Those are only thoughts. You are not-two. The thought activity, as well as the activities you’re doing willfully (but claiming are low conscious) are intentionally veiling yourself, from feeling & knowing the love & truth you actually are. It can’t be said to be a “problem”, as it’s what you’re choosing. As you said, this has already been seen. That bucket is not holding water. You’re just trying to hang on to insights. Log them in an electronic journal of some sort, remain empty. The flow of insights will resume, and due to the feeling of it, you will experienced the miracle, the rockin of the path, and will have no inclinations to personify ego, consciousness, insights, awareness, etc. Presence is simply being without voluntary thinking, on behalf of the indirectly created ‘separate self’. This is precisely what is desired. It is desire “itself”, ever-known. Express, rather than conceptualize. Any expressive interest or activity will do. You can not forget on purpose. You can let thinking go. Memory is just sexier, more enticing thinking. It adds to the experience. Give’s it depth, and kind of an added ‘bonus’ game imo. There’s no being less or being more. There is being you as you are, or ruminating in self referential thought to suppress the body & mind from releasing, and love, passion, understanding & compassion arising. Welcome the full experience of feeling. Explore every square millimeter of it. There are some clever twists and turns, such as the lasting joy lying prior to sadness & sorrow, and bliss lying prior to anger. (You had to make it somehow or this experience would be lame). Express and release, all you want is truly within, not without... you be like this, effortlessly ruling your galaxy all day long. You’re believing oil & water mix there, with the desire & fear. They won’t, which is exactly what you are experiencing & discovering. You’re creating fear, so you can’t possibly integrate it. I would contemplate what “integrate” actually means to you. What “second thing” do you figure you’re integrating? Where exactly are you believing fear is coming from? If you’re going to believe in believing, at least make it love, or empowerment. I’d let go so the real deal can fill ya up. Just an opinion though. You might find there is but one source, and it neither contains nor offers, fear. Trust in yourself, only, believe in yourself, only. The sounds point, the entity is you. There is a paradigm of trust at play, veiling what you are wishing would arise & transpire. You’re making up the idea consciousness is coming from someone which you are making up, and you’re believing your own story. I’d so no biggie, but you are suffering and not seeing how you’re creating, and I’m convinced you’re interested in seeing how. (Just reminding you, as again, you said you experience pure consciousness, you, already) Fine line between helping you see that, and more “levels” and an “education” needed so you can reach yourself, which you already of course, and actually know you are. In this way, by your own choice, you are literally creating the very “frustrating exhales”, the veiling, you desire to be without. Creating the very resistance that simply does not resonate. You might be “hypnotized” as you say, and on the rollercoaster, but you indeed are creating & choosing it. There isn’t, and it doesn’t. That “it” does, is a thought. Solidity never happens. It’s you appearing to yourself as yourself. You & I and every other, experience one single thought at a time by design. There is not a “huge schematic of thoughts”, that is a thought. Believing it, or not. To avoid feeling, you’re creating outrageous models of what thought is, which has led you to create the belief the feeling is separate. It is not. What lies ahead is not known, but is you - not knowing, so it doesn’t matter ultimately...just appears to. Drop notions like “hardened thoughts” asap. That’s one thought, about “hardened thoughts”. That trunk is connected. So connected in fact, there are, not-two. Knowledge is not overridden, it is overriding, but you are choose it to. Let it go. It is never coming. Ever. Nor is anyone else ever coming, who could give it to you. Enjoy the hide and seek, until you don’t anymore, then start doing the inspecting, so you understand what’s going on here (‘in’ direct experience) Just start. Write out the absolute smallest step you could do each day. Seeing it linearly like that changes everything. What once appeared big, challenging, and difficult...is revealed to be within your control, enjoyable, and even effortless. A dreamboard is a hell of a way to experince yourself. TLDR: Put “progress” as a higher priority than enjoying this moment, and life will not make sense.

@lostmedstudent Positive and negative visualization can go very deep and can be very powerful when used consistently. Before I started using psychedelics for my development this was my most used tool for shadow work. Essentially I treat it as a meditation, usually between 30 minutes to an hour. The primary difference is that I choose a theme of myself to explore. For example if I had a fear regarding something whatever it may be I would visualize the absolute worst thing that could possibly happen in relation to that fear happening. I would basically visualize the absolute darkest and lowest point I could regarding that fear and just sit there with all of the images that the mind brings up. If you go deep enough this can be terrifying. However I will then switch to positive visualization in relation to the particular fear. I will visualize the most beautiful, liberating and loving things I possibly can about whatever it is i'm focusing on. If you go deep enough you can come to intense bliss. As I reach the absolute most beautiful, and heavenly visualizations I possibly can in relation to overcoming and working through that fear I just sit there with it. I will sit there in both the positive and negative states until I feel I am ready to switch. I do this process of cycling between positive and negative until I am completely ok with whatever comes up. I do it until the images of heaven and hell no longer move me. And once i'm ok with everything that arises then I bring the visualization to a close. It took me a while to get used to it but it has helped me to clear up a lot of my shadows. Regarding psychedelics, I have "died", (had the experience of ego death) a few times in deep psychedelic trips and I just want to let you know that those experiences are only scary if you hold on to something. If you truly let go and are ok with being totally annihilated you'll instantly be plunged into a sea of bliss and infinite beauty. You will feel freedom and awe beyond words. That is how my deeper trips have been. This may sound crazy but these substances and the experiences they produce have a kind of "intelligence" to them. They will look out for you if you respect them. If you take them with the purpose of inner development they will know that, and they will show you exactly what you need for your highest growth and development in life. As long as you let go and know that it is all always ok, you will be fine.

It is real and unreal. There is only freedom. This is it, whatever is is it. The feeling that this isn't it, is it. If there is a story that awakening is some grand event, a prolonged state of bliss, that is just a story. There is no where to go, this is complete. You didn't glimpse that there was nobody here, a glimpse happened for no one. This is not a state or experience, it is this, ordinary but extraordinary for no one. You are looking for an experience, a different this, you cant find this because it is already. You are in your own way, and you'll always be.

@The observer How do you distinguish awakening from enlightenment then? Like i've had an awakening where i realized i'm god, and i felt just insights being downloaded to me, with bliss coursing through me. But i still felt like a person, and i wouldn't consider that my death but i'm not sure. Is the death of death ego death? If so, what IS ego death?

@zeroISinfinity Okay haha. My third eye is cracking and popping like crazy. I remember during my awakening where i got the waves of bliss it popped fully open. You think just sitting and being with these sensations in between my eyes overtime this will lead to enlightenment? I'm not sure what practices to do now, like i do meditate again for like 30 minutes to an hour but i don't know if i'm close to actual awakening again. Kinda getting bored tbh. I feel like i'm in limbo, like i'm so close to actual enlightenment where i feel it, but at same time i am disconnected right now.

I nominate all meditators in this forum who are currently in self isolation - to meditate 3 hours a day for the next 21 days... Document the process & publish a video titled... "I meditated 3 hours straight for 21 days, this is what happened! " I am currently on day 2 of 21 and attempting to complete at least one 3 hour strong determination Vipassana Sit per day. Lets create a wave of bliss...

Just be careful sounds like you might have lots of shadow work my friend. I always say that trips like LSD are dangerous for people with lots of shadow work and not good self control because if you get yourself into a bad trip you'll be there for 12 hours... LSD makes me just feel fuckin crazy for 12 hours. But you might resonate with it. I personally prefer shorter and slightly more powerful trips like DMT, although 5meo plugged is where it's at. Regular DMT is extremely visual and quite intense. I actually prefer microdose of DMT now, after a long sit. And just sip on the pipe for an hour or so. If you keep having bad trips you can either use mdma to steer the trip in a positive direction (MD goes well with a lot of psycs, but watch out MD is notoriously impure and mixed with shit) or you can look into getting some trip killers. Look up "trip killers". Leo says he finds shrooms hard to handle, as do a lot of other people. It really depends on you and your mind. I've only did shrooms twice and both at low doses. Also, it's not legal at all, and I'm not allowed to source, but you can get 5meo on empire market on the darknet. Online black market. It really works but you need to know what your doing a little. Educate yourself on how to use it, it's an extremely powerful tool, and it's not as dangerous as you might think. But there are obviously some dangers and things that you can make small mistakes with...but I've had nothing but positive experiences with the darknet. It's my friend ? I'll be ordering a gram or 5meo for £200 in the next week or two hopefully, domestic shipping is best. This is by far the most powerful avenue I have. And 5meo is the best. For me, it's the least scary compound. I always experience god-bliss on it. The self knowledge is incredible while on it...it's the perfect chemical. Ticks all the right boxes for me. I prefer it over ever drug (psychedelic and non-psychedelic) <3

Once consciousness raises to a certain level, different ways of perceiving the world becomes accessible at ease. Different ways of perceiving the world leads to bending the rules of the world in ways that it cannot through a traditional materialistic view. This is what I generally see as the occult. You could say its engineering on another dimension. I haven't looked, as its not generally an interest to me, even if it does exist and leads to many possibilities. But there is undeniable suffering in the world at large from the survival of the human race. And with no particular moral intent, I wish to reduce that suffering as much as possible by bending the rules of reality to allow me to survive on less food, and cause less suffering. I have a strong urge to use as little, if any of this earth. I want to consume way less, food, natural resources for tools and equipment, house materials, etc. Its not really a logical or preemptive thing, its just a desire or something I'm drawn to doing. I've just heard of certain yogic techniques for living off very little food, for sleeping less, and for surviving in very cold climates by using kundalini energy to produce temperature to make the body survive, rather than consuming from the earth and making blankets and stuff. I don't know why, and I know it must sound very stupid and strange, but the idea of consuming less, having barely any possessions, and bring all survival back to the body (through the occult) sounds very beautiful to me. Maybe a way to describe it, is karma. All possessions and indulgence has a karma to it. Nothing wrong with that, but it does, and by exiling those possessions and indulgence from your life, you are purifying yourself from karma. If you view karma as a mental or intellectual construction and limitation, you can see how relying on blankets adds karma. The subconscious, hidden fear of the blanket being taken away from you is always there, adding suffering. You need the blanket to survive, and as survival is a source of suffering, the blanket adds suffering. The blanket also reinforces the sense of being a human. To be a human means to need a blanket to survive, otherwise you freeze to death. But see this is not your true nature, and there is no need to limit yourself in this way. You are not a human, and you can use the occult to warm yourself up in a superhuman fashion. You can see how all materialistic possessions add this karma. Houses are more than your shelter, the fact that you need a house defines who you are, and adds karma to your life. The fear you get of losing your house is because your house isn't simply some objective thing where if you lose it you die, no. The house on a metaphysical level IS the ego. A house is part of an ego. Without an ego, there is no house. For me personally, stuff like these realisations have fuelled this new lifestyle I want to live. This is why the thought of it endows me in Love. The possibilities from taking these steps is awe striking. So much karma can be freed from living this way for a few years. It sheds the identity significantly and adds so much bliss and love. Just imagine barely any material possessions, and all survival that was outsourced to these possessions are embodied within you through mind training and the occult. Its a very blissful way to live. The more you do this, the more you also heal others. The less you take, the more you give to others. So it works to help you and others. And the compassion and knowing that you're not taking, makes you feel like you're not hurting anyone, not hurting the wildlife, other people, etc. There's also a lot of subconscious suffering from taking if you're sensitive to it. When you take food, there is a lot of karma in that even if its not visible. It adds suffering. You relieve it by taking less. I'm not saying you must change your life to the extreme I want to, to free yourself of this karma. You probably don't have to. But not only is this a way of freeing myself, but I also want to do it and am drawn to living like it. So I'm simply going with the flow.

@John Doe No i would not consider myself enlightened. But i don't want to be fake humble and say i'm not far on the path. I've had peak experiences where i've felt bliss flowing through me, and everything in the world just made sense and it felt like a stream of insights flowing into my head. But i'm also not awake to infinite love and joy, which to me is most important haha so it's tough. But i bet i can help with questions on the path, just take what i say with a grain of salt. Also, i would consider myself to have an excellent eye as to who on the forum is worth listening to and has advice that can change your life. @Nahm is one of the few, and it's basically his job to enlighten seekers so i recommend talking to him too.