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About Ampresus

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  • Birthday July 13

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    The Netherlands
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  1. 14-06-19 I am not making any progress. Just jerked off to porn, bought 2C-B today from your typical street dealer. Yesterday I sat on my balcony during the night for a whole 30 minutes. I am planning to do more of that. I emailed a local drugs advisor about the 2C-B, whether I should jerk off before using it to decrease the extra libido and how I am supposed to test a drug when I am a minor.
  2. 07-06-19 Hello everyone. Not gonna lie, not much happened in these past few days. I asked, the same girl I asked a long time ago, out. After ignoring me for 1 day, I messaged her again and she finally responded. Haven't really been practicing asking girls out in public, mostly because I don't had the time. Now that the holidays are approaching, I will be going out again.
  3. I want to get, for the first time really, serious about a topic. I recently listened to Leo's video about beliefs and have decided to put most of my focus on this. After having gone through the whole thing I still got left unanswered about certain things. I hope I am asking these questions the right way. 1. Should I start by questioning specifically meta-beliefs or normal beliefs if that matters at all? 2. How can one know that they have directly experienced something as easy as 1+1=2? 3. (following up on question 2) If you have directly experienced something, are you still meant to question it? Like questioning the fact that you percieved green as green or Leo as bald. 4. Is there a specific practice that really helps with this? I suppose contemplation for hours. If you have any other suggestions feel free to speak up. 5. Do you know any good books about this topic?
  4. 03-06-19 Great news everyone! Ramadan ends today! Today is my last fasting day! I have decided to focus on dropping beliefs. My approach on self-actualization has been too much from everything and then ending on nothing. I listened to Leo's video about beliefs and it really got to me. I won't be reaching out to much new knowledge, I wanna focus on beliefs. I have meditated for a few minutes today. I noticed how my legs started hurting even though I was sitting on my bed. I tried different positions, but it just didn't feel good. That is why I will be making a post about other types of meditation soon. Still hitting on girls, no succes.
  5. @flowboy Zuid-Holland. Keeping my city private.
  6. I have the same question man. I am participating in Ramadan and so far have encountered (I think) a few mystical experiences. Fasting + my loneliness + boredom for hours = me sitting on a chair in the park looking at animals and see stuff collide. You forget you are hungry or thirsty for a few seconds. I wish to relive those experiences everyday and so visit my local park a lot now. Impala's are funny. Atleast, I think they are impala's. They always just lay around and eat. Not much to do, just really simple. However, I don't know how fasting can do more for me then just a few mystical experiences. It sometimes felt like awakening, then again I have never ''awakened'' and so don't know how that feels.
  7. Hello everyone. To face my fears and actually stand a chance at getting a girlfriend, I decided since the day before yesterday that I would atleast hit on one girl per day. So far I have hit on I think 5 girls and all rejected me. That is why I am posting this. I have the following questions: 1. Can pick up lines work? So far I have only tried a pick up line that I made myself. I approach a girl and then say: ''Are your parents painters? Because you are a nice view.'' (sounds better in Dutch). The girls I used it on always laughed, but then proceeded to say that they are already taken. Only the girl I tried it on today made it clear that she wasn't interested. 2. How do you approach a girl when she is walking with someone? I see plenty of beautiful girls that I just don't know how to approach. Mostly because they are walking with their parents, their girlfriends, their boyfriend or in a whole group of friends. I don't know how, if at all, I should approach these girls. I mean it can get really awkward when her parents are literally next to her or when her entire group of friends are watching me. When there is only one girlfriend around, I might be able to do it. When a boy walks next to her, it seems like an immediate no-no for me. 3. How should I start the convo? I have tried pick up lines and then ask for their number, told them how pretty they are and ask for their number or start first with asking if I am bothering them at all. None have worked. Do I need to be less direct? If so, what am I supposed to tell them first? ''I saw you walking around and I think you are very beautiful so I needed to say hi. How has your day been?'' ? Just a normal convo? Not directly asking her number? 4. Hitting on girls in my school or hitting on girls on the street? Which do you recommend? I mean I see the girls in my school everyday, so once rejected it can get really awkward for the rest of the year. I have tried to hit on girls mostly in the city centre. I noticed how half of the girls I approached only speak English. Which means I need to practice lines both in Dutch and English, being able to switch between when the girl happens to be English and still look normal. Stuttering to a beautiful girl WHO ONLY SPEAKS ENGLISH is really easy. Girls in my neighborhood look good, but have (like me) an Islamic background and so reject me instantly knowing how it could damage their faith. Atleast that is what I have encountered with the 2 girls I hit on who live in my neighborhood.
  8. 30-05-19 Hello everyone. I have good news and bad news. Bad news: Today in the night I just couldn't and jerked off to porn. It happened fast, didn't even really watch a video. Good news: I am trying to build up experience by hitting on atleast 1 girl per day. Yesterday I hit on one girl, today on 3. Went to the park again. Almost, again, everything collided. I swear I am close to a deep awakening or something like that. Stress + sexual urge + tiredness = tired me walking around and being fascinated by cows.
  9. 28-05-19 Greetings everyone. If there is someone reading this... I hope you enjoy your day mate! Not much progress. Although I am progressing in reading my book! Says something right? I don't know. Tomorrow I hope that I will have the guts to approach this girl. Just asking her group of friends something like Leo suggested me to. Something gossipy he said. I will try to care as less as possible about the outcome. I am surprised that I wasn't lying about the whole ''quitting porn'' thing. It is so easy now to not watch porn. I am 5 days after my last... you know what... and I am feeling great. Haven't felt the sad feelings in quite some time. I wonder where I have buried them.
  10. @flowboy Ok lets do it your way. @bejapuskas
  11. 24-05-19 It has been too long. A lot has happened. ALMOST QUIT PORN. Just today I jerked off and noticed that after so many days, I haven't really gotten much sperm. Weird, I think? Might need to check that out. Of course, next time will be when I actually have intercourse. No porn. (Btw: I just noticed how after jerking off and hormons rise up and all that, I really get pumped up. Testosteron is making me go nuts.) Now to the, rather, sad stuff. I have recently been having issues related to boredom and loneliness. 2 days ago I decided to ''break the cycle'' as I call it. ''The cycle'' is my daily routine basically. Wake up, go to school, be a robot in school making stupid exercises, coming home, studying, going to my computer, sleep and repeat. I went to the local park. Believe it or not, they have impala's there. I decided to sit my ass down and watch them for hours. Now this is where weird stuff happened. I started feeling really tired. The animal I was watching looked me straight in the eye while eating grass. Things started colliding sometimes, then it would go back to normal. This continued for quite sometime. I would feel like collapsing. My inner me, don't know how to really call it, started breaking down. Exactly when it was breaking down, it built itself up really fast. Then I was back to normal. This might be me daydreaming. Currently I am fasting for Ramadan. I was really down at that point. I will be in the future, but now I want answers for whatever happened there. That is why I will visit those same impala's more in the future.
  12. Been in for 5-6 months I think. Currently on 16 books. I have become a slow reader.
  13. @bejapuskas Who said she should? She can always reject. Never insisted on her accepting.
  14. @see_on_see Elaborate please. @see_on_see Already on that! @see_on_see I find RSD being really ''THE SECRET 5 STEPS TO SUCCES'' kinda bs. I have figured out by now that quick-fixes are fiction.