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Guys, feel free to ask any questions. I thought of some: - Did you get enlightened? Definitely no. My monkey-mind got extremely crazy up to a point that I was literally risking my life. I got so in such with my solar plexus chakra (which is responsible for "will-power") that I simply I understood the power I have within me. (Which is absolutely infinite). Do you understand this? It's fucking infinite! Think of quantic physics. It is like a mirror, spreading infinitely outward and inward. We are part of this vortex. If having this insight means "getting" enlightened, so, yes I got. But only AFTER psychedelics. But really, don't take this enlightenment has some woo-woo concept. Enlightenment is the fundamental basis of Reality. What really helped cut through the ego was the down-right exposure. It was so freakin' intense, dude! I confronted my biggest fear EVER. You wouldn't believe if I told you. Anyway... I suppose I had a rude awakening experience. And this Alert state varies throughout the day. It is really cool. Sometimes I think I lost it, but then... BAM! Here it is again. - How did your family react? It was so fucking hard. I was acting like a 5-year-old. I was SUPER rebel. And I was very rude also. I live with my sister, grandma, and sister. Dude, meditation is a woo-woo thing in Brazil, and they even made fun of me. It was really hard to put up with other people during that time. Not just my family, but, really, almost everybody. I dived so deep internally and I got so acquainted with how the mind works that at some point all that big fucking structure COLLAPSED. Haha. It is a daily challenge to keep my individuality as a spiritual seeker and don't get lost in the concrete jungle, if you know what I mean. Hihi. - What tips do you have? Well, my meditation sessions were kinda sloppy. Hehe. But it kinda felt good to just sit there and do nothing. Just think, think, fantasize. And really engage in all that mental masturbation. But at some point I saw how I was becoming highly unpresent when I was doing meditation. I don't know, it was as if I couldn't relax, you know? Well, I was really having a DEEP spiritual purging. > Be aware of Spiritual Purging They're real. If you do the do-nothing, your mind will come up with all sorts of fantasies. It is really crazy how it is possible to actually let go of all control. And just let the mind think the most HORRIFIC things. This includes having sex with an alien, the taste of shit, and ways to kill yourself. I am being serious here. This is not funny. It can be terrifying, if you have a weak mind. So... > Strengthen your Mind You probably have a very sloppy mind. You are always in your comfort zone. Well, that's how the mind is designed. Haha, crazy, huh? We do not need our survival instincts on, so really 99% of your fears simply do not make any logical sense. It is absurd. Utter Absurd. That's what the mind is an Utter Absurd. Haha > Be more Playful Dude, you can get enlightened today, but really why do you look so hard? (I am telling this to myself). Even if I allegedly get this final A-ha, this total samadhi. So what? I will be dead very soon, and what I will take away from this life are moments of true sincerity and sharing. "Repeat after me: Life is a shit if you take it seriously. Fuck positivity. Fuck other people. Fuck society. Amem." Praise the Lord!!! Oh Hallelujah! Let's go Gospel! Hahahaha Cheers from São Paulo <o>

I found two great songs by a little-known musician named Stuart Davis. One of them is featured in the Audiobook Kosmic Consciousness with Ken Wilber, which I will put a review of later. Ladder The first song is called "Ladder." It's a lovely song about our personal and species-wide evolution and the natural clash with psychological entropy. That is, as we grow more complex as individuals and as a species, we also have more stuff that can topple us. I've got brains like antique floors I built each one on the one before I use all three but they don't agree One of them wants to love you Another one would love to club you I guess my old natures move like glaciers Chorus: The fish became a lizard The shrew became an ape Will the ape become an angel? The higher that we climb The more the ladder sways I'm the bastard child the one who got the head of Einstein and the soul of Pol Pot there's no compassion but I can split the atom Better give me a microscope for a different eye Better give me a telescope for the inward sky and a ladder leading up from Eden Chorus If Ramana Maharshi came from clay there's more to evolution than a little DNA Cut off the moorings to the inward ark Aiming it into a question mark The fish became a lizard The shrew became an ape will the ape become a Mother Teresa? She came from clay There's more to evolution than a little DNA Personal Commentary: Ladder bases itself off of the integral idea of Holarchy. Holarchies are made out of Holons. A holon refers to the something being both a whole and a part with no actual distinction between itself and other whole/parts other than arbitrary measures. Each holon is a system (or phenomenon) that is an evolving self-organizing dissipative structure, composed of other holons, whose structures exist at a balance point between chaos and order. Higher level holons are always at a more precarious position than lower level holons. This goes for physical objects, ecological systems, psychological stages, social organizations, and even spiritual development. With reference to holarchical human development, Alan Watts serves to help us see the issue: "how is man to be best related to his environment? Especially in circumstances where we are in possession of an extremely powerful technology and have, therefore, the capacity to change our environment far more than anyone else has ever been able to do so. Are we going to end up not by civilizing the world, but by Los-Angelizing it? In other words, are we going to foul our own nest as a result of technology? But all this gets down to—the basic question is, really, what are you going to do if you’re god? If, in other words, you find yourself in charge of the world, through technological powers, and instead of leaving evolution to what we used to call, in the 19th century, the blind processes of nature—that was begging the question, to call them blind—but at any rate, we say, we’re not going to leave evolution to the blind forces of nature but now we’re going to direct it ourselves. Because we are increasingly developing, say, control over genetic systems, control over the nervous system, control over all kinds of systems; uh then, simply, what do you want to do with it?" This song responds to Watts inquiry by pointing out that Perhaps there is a universal Telos. That there is a point to all of this and the despite the hemming and hawing and guffawing that we know as human violence and suffering, it works out in the end such that we become the gods that oversee us. We made a universe that is perfect for ourselves, despite seeming otherwise. Creating Heaven is Heaven. Watts echoes this sentiment at the end of his own lecture. What is your idea of heaven? What would you really like to have happen, if you could make it happen? That’s the first thing that really starts people thinking because you soon realize that a lot of the things you think you would want are not things you want at all. Supposing, just for the sake of illustration, that you had the power to dream every night any dream you wanted to dream. And you could, of course, arrange for one night of dreams to be seventy-five years of objective time, or any number of years of subjective time, what would you do? Well, of course, you’d start out by fulfilling every wish. You would have routs and orgies and uh uh all the most magnificent food and uh sexual partners and everything you could possibly imagine in that direction. When you got tired of that, after several nights, you’d switch a bit, and find yourself involved in adventures, and uh contemplating great works of art, fantastic mathematical conceptions; you would soon be rescuing princesses from dragons, and all sorts of things like that. And then one night you’d say, now look, Tonight what we’re gonna do is, we’re going to forget this dream is a dream. And we’re going to be really uh shocked, and when you woke up from that one you’d say, ‘Oooh, wasn’t that an adventure!’ ----- Nothing In Between The second song is called Nothing in Between. It is a wonderful tome about Nothingness, aka God. There is nothing in between us when we sleep Every night the bliss begins to leak Nothing in between us when we laugh it’s something that our head will never grasp It’s seen in between There’s nothing in between your joy and mine It’s all a lot of nectar on the vine Joy is how my parents were entwined and there’s nothing in between their lives and mine We’ve seen There’s nowhere to hide in the open Reality Love is so wide, there isn’t a boundary There is only one eye without any enemy when you’ve seen in between There’s nothing in between our skin and light Nothing in between the wind and kite Nothing in between our lips and grace Nothing in between the tongue and taste It’s seen (Refrain) There is nothing in between you and I Nothing in between blue and sky Nothing in between us and love Nothing in between wings and doves (Refrain) There is nothing in between Personal Commentary: This song struck me as a great way of pointing to non-distinction. This morning as I meditated using Headspace, I was instructed to feel that the center of creativity deep in my heart. I was then asked to extend my awareness of that center past my chest and to my whole skin. From there I was asked to expand this awareness to the walls around me. From there I extended it to my whole apartment complex... The City of LA... Earth... The Solar System... The Galaxy... The Virgo Cluster... The Laniakea SuperCluster... The whole Observable Universe that seems to form a universal Brain/mind complex... Then I pushed further - I asked what would be beyond that -- where is that universal brain? And I kept pushing outwards to see the next order of fractalization... and what came up was me! That is, I saw that cosmic brain complex residing in my own head or another version of me or maybe an alien or maybe some computer who itself resides in some version of the city of LA which is itself on some version of earth... And so on for all of eternity outwards. And so on for all of eternity inwards as well! Which is to say, I can't describe it as One because it has no end or beginning to its outwardness and inwardness. And to call something one, it must reach an outward and inward end. I could call it zero because it has no ground, but it's clearly here and now. " _____?!?!NOTHING?!?!______ " is all I that can be said about it. There's me = you = everything, which breaks down into ____!?nothing?!?!____ upon further investigation. There's ___!?!nothing?!?____ between physical material and conscious object. There's ___!?!nothing?!?_____ between past and future. It all happens Now - the only place that remains Absolutely unchanged EXCEPT that its also Absolutely Relative as proven by Einstein. There's ___!?!nothing!?___ between me and you. There's just ____!?!nothing??!___ between anything. There is no distinction. There no such thing as a thing-without-some-other-thing which means that there is No thing-other-than-the-whole-thing which means I cannot point to any-one-thing as-itself in-and-of-itself other than ___!?!nothing?!?____ . This is the Holarchical perspective. ---- Putting the ideas of both songs together we can intuit a holarchical ladder with nothing in between. We see an universe of other universes with no part distinct from other parts as it builds itself and destroys itself at the same time - Now - in a fashion that is relative to the timeline of each observer. This universe would: know all from a wide perspective and it would know all from a limited perspective - the one "we" see out of in our everyday understanding. Indeed, in knowing all it would know what it is like to not-know it all. It is from each one of these limited perspectives that the wide perspective gets generated. The manifestation of such wide perspective gives universal purpose. It would be a wild adventure.

Hi there fellow actualizers. I am writing this message because I am two selves going in opposite directions. And it seems that this is what the self-actualization path is all about. Today the void has been calling me strongly. It wants me to go yet it wants me to fill it. (also known as resistance) WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT VOID???? HUH? There comes a time in a man's life when nothing fills it anymore. All the drugs and pussy and love and justice and entertainment and alcohol and happiness and whatever else you can come up with will not fill it. It just gets bigger and bigger the more you try. You have this insane rush gathering and gathering. The urge to go for a quick hit of dopamine, serotonin and all those chemical cocktails we have become addicted to from birth because we have been conned into a game of survival when the truth is that life is just another phase of death and vice versa. Is this what it feels like to be a woman? You drink and smoke and eat and fuck and pump it up and burn it and freeze it and dive in with the sharks and lions and volcanoes and at some moments you get an immense relief. Shelter from the storm, as Bob Dylan called it. You are broken and freezing and dirty and full of hate and lies and you've raped and murdered and bombed children and whipped yourself with a razor belt and you've hijacked planes and driven them into skyscrapers. The void. You want to allow it and let it go and forgive and surrender to all this madness and all the voices and you are lost and hopeless and you smile and start to laugh hysterically. Just let go. Release. All of it. The pain. The joy. The "trying to figure out" why they did it and why she has to die and comforting others with some bullshit buddhist advice that you don't even believe in yourself. You never wanna miss an opportunity of stepping up as the wise one. No sir! Those answers are never found. Just brutal suffering. You used to think that this is what makes everything beautiful. The kinder you are born, the more intense the suffering. It takes a lifetime of failure and seeing the illusions life has to offer to learn to suffer with kindness, that is the ultimate gift. You walk around this palace of lies. Orgies everywhere. Your friends and family just want to relax from work. Buy some new clothes and dream of a better life but their smiles have faded and this makes you sad because you are just starting to get this shit and really coming alive. So what the fuck does that imply? That as you ascend to the Gods, all the people you love will drown in hell, waiting for you to rescue them but no longer convinced that anything is possible?? What the fuck kind of cruel twisted lullaby is that? You walk around the cities and parks of the world. Stare at birds and flowers and old ladies with their monk-like dumbness and you want to just tell them to keep on living in their bubble because.... i forget what i wanted to say. Am i an alien? Is that it? Can we really be the same species with all these hum-ants? I never wanted this fucking awareness shit. I wanna be a happy slave. Willingly bend over and take it up the ass like a good little school girl. So yeah. Hi. Life is getting better, it is. Figuring out what my values are. But I'm an addict and you know what they say, never trust an addict. It's like I really wanna be depressed but my newfound wisdom just says "thoughts and feelings" that's all there is. Depression is another dumb idea for losers who want to just stay where they are in life. It's a clever disguise. Being depressed implies that your are somebody that is something. We all know that there's no substance to anything at all. Just a dynamic movement of random reactions and things hunting other things to stay alive. Lights and sounds, all around. You try to meditate outside but all of the machines and insects start to sound like symphonies. What a fucking distraction. It's hard to find some proper silence these days. The more closer you get, it's like some prick is turning up the volume of the "hum" or "om". You're way past going to see someone for this. You will traumatize those bastards. You can go in anytime. Into It !! Different paths and approaches: kindness, calm, humor, yoga of the moment... you can dance like a madman and feel the void in its entirety. Right here right now anytime any place. I don't give a fuck if its the presidents funeral. When the void calls, you better be ready boy. That's the real challenge and I KNOW it's waiting for me. I'm procrastinating. Money, sex, travel, happiness, business, art, writing, reading... I was gonna add Leo's course to that list but actually that's one of the few things that seem to really be taking me towards the void. And it's scary. It's hard work. All these value assessments and shit. God damn it. I just thought i wanted money and pussy. Not "love" and "truth" and "beauty". But i knew what this was about when signed up for this shit. I enlisted in the greatest army there is. They love young handsome soldiers like me. Leo recruits them young. What the hell man. Can i throw up the red pill and pretend we never met? (puts finger down throat) Hahahahahahaaaaaa (vomit of laughter) "Best joke i've heard all year." That's like asking to be unborn. To press rewind and go back to .... The void. It's inescapable. Waiting for you to shut all this bullshit off. The darkness. The silence. The light. It's waiting for you. Legs spread wide open. Rock hard. The king of all pleasure and pain and sorrow. There's a bloody hell of a revolution to crawl through to even get out of the prison. You fight the war and kill all your enemies and then find your people dead and see the enemy boss in the mirror. Takes another sip of some shitty disgusting beer. Ugh. Even jerked off twice today. I want more. MORE MORE MORE MORE. And the headache. Aaa. God let me just fucking be. I dont want to face anything. I want to keep on running away from reality and intoxicating myself and staying here with all these good hearted people who keep me down. You must continue. Stay strong brother. You have come this far. JUST. KEEP. GOING. I wish i still knew how to cry hard.

Machine Elves are a Terence McKenna thing. As much as I love the guy (see my signature), I never read much into his ramblings (for lack of a better word) about machine elves. Here is a YouTube video of McKenna explaining his "Self-Transforming Machine Elves" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vH4UdX2D5sY I have read The Teachings of Don Juan and just grabbed his second book A Separate Reality over the weekend! Found it at my local flea market from a lady named "Willow" who sells all kinds of cool metaphysical stuff lol. Thanks Willow! I also wanted to comment that during my first DMT experience, I found myself sitting at the feet of a giant African warrior (as best as I can describe) tall and skinny wearing an ovalish (almost alien head-shaped) mask with iridescent tribal designs covering it. The giant placed his hands on his knees and squatted down and leaned in as if to get a better look at me. As he brought his masked face closer to mine, I saw other little tribal warriors hiding behind the designs in the mask, popping their heads up to show themselves and for them to get a better look at me. I felt like they were his children. Must've been "take your child to work day" in dimension-transcending African warrior spirit guide land! What a concept! I must say that these visions might have been influenced by the music I was listening to during this experience, which was Shpongle, who have a world music mixed with psytrance sound. Every song is a masterpiece, but I digress. I love the concept of your chamber of solitude! it's great to have a dedicated space for tripping and/or meditation (which are synonymous to me nowadays) I took 52.8 FRESH grams (equivalent to 5.28 dried grams) on Saturday and let go so much that I couldn't control my bladder. It was so "bothersome" (more like demanding of my attention) That I wished I knew how to put a catheter in myself lol. I laid in my bed for the majority of my experience with a bucket next to my bed and got naked and would just sit up and let my body rid itself of the toxins through my urine ( my urine was cloudy and yellow) I would sit up every ten-fifteen min a pee just a little bit, over and over and over again. After this experience I decided to give serious attention to learning how to make tincture, as I believe the mushroom tissue was giving me these negative side effects, and not the psilocybin/psilocin itself. Anyway, without turning this into a trip report, I just wanted to put my speculative two cents in that I've seen entities on mushrooms and DMT and that alone is enough for me to be open to the idea that they are "real" (define that word as you will) I love you guys

@Principium Nexus be careful to share this video with us. I researched a little bit about this Nazca alien. it seems to be fake. Lately some hobby scientists make dokus about alien stuff in peru . There was found an alien hand some month before from this pseudo science group (this was fake, it were just human bones ordered new so that it looks like an alien hand). This is not real science, they just want to make some money with this fake alien (for updates in this project you need to pay...).

we might all be wearing the same ''clothing'' that is being a human being, which subjects us all to certain possibilities and limits but we're all much much further from each other then we think. the illusion of ''race'' disappears and the exploration of consciousness is unique to each and everyone. my life now is practically alien if I were to compare it to when I was a 'human surviving in a world' and yet I still harmoniously fit into the play that is human society. so as far as I'm concerned, I don't have a single clue,not an ounce of understanding of how other people live and experiences their lives. this post is a nice observation. we're really not that alike,yet we are, but we're really all unique in our exploration. It's easier to nice on obvious outliers like people who enlighten ''instantly'' but soon you will see it everywhere. somehow we can relate to each other but at the same we do not have a damn clue what's happening beyond our personal life. that is pavement for the awe of life to come in, the awe is the intense realization that you really really don't know what's going on, you're just in awe from the miracle of it all, it's just so beyond and immense. What's more, what does ''instantly'' mean? we know that Eckhart Tolle suffered immensely before he enlightened. Do we know how long he suffered? the entire night before it? that doesn't really mean anything. from experience I know that when it comes to enlightenment time is completely warped and bended sideways like magic. and for someone to enlighten overnight, that is very intense, enlightenment is insanely intense just doing it gradually overnight?? for all you know he might've suffered an entire month or an entire year psychologically in one single night. Eckhart that wasn't really familiar with enlightenment before that might've not even realized that time being warped this way was possible so he might've not been conscious that his happened. He said he suffered a lot right before he enlightened, but what does that mean exactly? it doesn't tell us anything really, that's my personal opinion words cannot convey such an experience

I meditated for 4 hours a day for 4 weeks. The first thing i did was lay on my bed and painstakingly neutralized all my thoughts which i accomplished 2 weeks in or so. Then i began thinking again and flexed all my muscles and joints each time i meditated. I gave that another week. The final week i began to desire to be given the gift of contact with an alien or form of energy. At about the third or fourth hour of the last day i went into a heavy wonderful trance. The trance lasted for 15 minutes or so and i felt i was out of my body incredibly fast as i saw muliticlusters of quadrillions of galaxies flash by me. I ran into the unmovable and invisible wall of this universe and seemed to bounce off of it and went to the other side and bounced of of that in a different angle. Then bounced of another wall and returned to my body. Then the trance was over and i felt terribly horrified. I felt the presence of a being that boggled my mind. I had enough courage to jump off my bed and open the door. Outside in my back yard in a dark Alaskan winter i looked up into the night's sky and saw the stars above me not knowing why i was looking up almost like i had forgotten I'd been meditating on contacting a being from deep space. I noticed a small light seconds later coming down through the atmosphere. It was very very fast at first but it was strange because it appeared small but since it was so far away at first (and it was a blue orb of light the size of a basketball when i saw it hovering outside the door window, making the snowy trees behind it glow) it must have changed its size as it came down! As soon as i saw it in the window i completely lost my fear and was in a mesmerizing and utterly peaceful awe. I ran upstairs and told my dad about what i saw but he didn't believe me. Ugh.. so i ran back downstairs and was super happy it was still there. This time i opened the door and reached out my hand but i suddenly hesitated and withdrew my hand and closed the door. My theory is that all objects in existence aquire data/knowledge as they travel through space. Since i traveled outside my body several times, the paths i took in trails gave me insight about the nature of things. No object can collect all of the information and is blessed in the eternal quest for learning. Had 15 years of psychic abilities from the age of 15 until the age of 30. I prayed/ willed my abilities away to keep me safe from insanity because i experienced too much truths and it felt too much of a task for my body to endure. 90 percent of the abilities led me to astonishment and joy but i felt like i wasn't designed for too much of that world while being in my body and i learned to be happy about learning of those things and felt satisfied completely to wait for death to continue my journey. Another of my many theories is when the mass of all things is spread out to the point of an inner shell of the circle of the edge of this universe the force of gravity in the center will be like that of the largest black hole that's ever been and the remaining matter is drained into another zone. I thank the drug ketamine in a gas form for giving me a near death experience which led to my awesome experiences at the age of 15 for a doctor and an anesthesiologist to break my arm bones back into place due to a wrestling accident in practice at my high school. Whatever the trigger and how ever you attain enlightenment is up to the individual like all spiritual physics.

Hey Journal! Today is great! Though I have been watching my breath as much as I can this weekend was rough.... I went to two parties that lasted forever!!! I mean I love being around people but I have a point where my brain just breaks and I can't enjoy socializing anymore. I feel so fried today... I didnt write last week because I decided to go and put up a picket fence in my yard that I plan to turn into a raised garden bed king of thing... It will be cool I will post a pic. But anyways I did that and ended up with a blister from hell on my right hand. For 3 days typing was the devil lol its good now though! To be perfectly honest though I lost my breath since I hurt my hand, I mean I didnt completely stop. But I was living in an entirely unconscious way during those days. It was just a rough time I guess. I need to step it up. I have been trying to figure out my identity my whole life. Its kind of what has driven me to learn all of this random meditation/science stuff. I feel alien among people most of the time. Its like when in conversation I feel so limited by my physical capabilities. I feel like I am running windows 10 on a computer built in 1985 and its just glitching out constantly with the program sending too many inquiries and the hardware cant handle the load. I just need to reset and regroup.

Post how you plan to execute it here. I did one for a week and it was very hard. I only went solo due to financial constraints. I also wish I had just kept inquiring instead of writing down my insights. You may find yourself become hyper-creative, so it will be tempting to put that to work before you forget, but if Truth is your aim, just put all the focus in the inquiry and leave all the concepts and labels behind. I was way too caught up with trying to map the process. Deep consciousness work is like exploring something so alien that your maps and attempts at explaining will only get in the way. Focus on the direct consciousness and allow yourself to be able to explain it later if you have to, not during your inquiry.

You have to see that every realm of reality like our normal "waking state", "dreaming state", "sleeping state" comes with certain dynamics that shape what can exist in these realms. It's like every of these realms is like a frame through which certain pictures are possible because of the nature of the frame. Now, realize that your normal waking state is just one of these frames. It can see, hear, feel, touch etc. and that's it. There could be an infinite collection infinitely combined of these way's to perceive that would shape infinite worlds out of nothingness that would include literally everything you can ever think of. The vampire sits right in front of you right now. You just don't have the frame to see it. And if you had, it could be as real as a tree. Contemplate that. I'd strongly suggest that you don't have a body that can die. If you realize that and go through that experience a couple of times with psychedelics (you'll be totally shocked if you do) you'll see that merely your current frame ends. Your perceptions will go away and you'll begin to realize who you really are. Because something will still remain because it was never birthed in life nor will it ever die out of life. What happens then? I don't know. Probably a lot of different stuff for a lot of different individual frames that come to an end. Maybe these frames are connected and undergo development. Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe they just die of and nothing happens, until another one comes on. Maybe. You'll see. But whatever happens will be fine because you cannot die. Because you are God. G - o motherfuckin' d. You'll live your life how you're supposed to live it. It's different for every one. Don't worry, you'll find your way. But as soon as you try to mark out an general case for every one, you'll fail. That one doesn't exist. Because if it did, all the subjective ones couldn't exist - although they do. Dude, if you don't wanna do it, don't. There's no problem. Nobody's pointing fingers here and laughing. But don't expect to ever know what it feels like to be in space when you don't actually want to fly in space with a rocket. Is it scary? Of course it is. It's outer space. Will you ever be able to get even a glimpse of it when you don't go. No. Simply no. Because to experience absolute infinity you have to go through a membrane that we call death. Now in front of this membrane (personally for you) there are all kinds of fears, daemons, stories, all the good stuff. And all of them will rush your way if you are on the way to cross the membrane. And they'll try to hold you down. And only the one who goes through that will be able to pass the membrane and experience absolute infinity. For one it might be easier, for another one it will never be achievable by "conscious will". The point is, to even get there you need the power of something as strong as 5-MeO-DMT. And even then it's not an easy ride. You can meditate for the next 40 years (which is great and you should do that because it helps on so many levels). But even then I seriously doubt that you get a glimpse of this experience because it's so different. It's so alien. There is no tool in your intellectual tool box to make sense of it. Maybe you do, there certainly are people who did it that way. It's your choice.

@Shrek_Of_Justice You've got that right! It's like living in a bubble of thought. I remember the my first 'escape' from the bubble of thought and concept. I sat there for hours silently observing people running around, going from one place to another. Doing their scheduled chores right on schedule. I gotta do this. I gotta do that. I gotta be here now. I gotta be there after. On and on and on. And they're all running over each other just to keep their schedule on schedule. It looked like absolute insanity from where I was standing. It was so alien because I couldn't relate to anything that was happening at that moment. Like I was in a totally different country with a totally different culture, and I totally didn't fit in. haha That's why I say you don't see it happening until you actually step out of it and view it from the outside. I remember thinking 'Holy shit, that's me too!. I've been literally sleep walking through life.

@Anton Rogachevski Well sure, "experience" is just a label we attach to everything you're sensing. Don't overthink it. Experience simply means: the 5 senses plus thought. In other words, EVERYTHING you've ever encountered from the moment you were born till today. But then there's consciousness beyond that. It can't really be imagined because imagination is related to sense experience. Try not to think of it as anything. Not some alien landscape or anything. Consciousness may just be Nothing

@Ilya I'm literally doing the exact same thing before my college semester starts. At my dorm I'm doing a home made retreat. I have a small meditation journal, try to go big with your time and really try to live the simple spartan life. Little phone, no computer, no messaging. Eat lots of fruit and veggies. I'm four days in so far, eating a consistent diet of baby carrots and blueberries for breakfast, Leo's soup for lunch, and brócoli pasta for dinner. My meditation ranges from 4-7 hours. Here is the key: you know yourself best, don't be afraid to experiment and make your own forms of meditations that work best for you. If you are trying to become enlightened, try to not get too caught up in the answers your learned online and try to stay in a state of "not-knowing" which is always the state your in before your greatest insights. Don't be afraid to act a little insane when your alone, laugh out loud, cry, pray, face your fears, do what gets you in that state of uncertainty. I'll post a few photos of my notes as an example of my current progress. 分 = minutes 时 = hour 总数 = total (time) 心得 = insights Basically from the photos, you'll see a theme. I'll write in dark ink the practice and for how long AFTER I do it, not before. Then I'll write little important quick insights from that practice, then I write my whole "how my day went" at the end of the day, and also clarify the insights in more detail that I wrote earlier. The first day was figuring out how to get started with my momentum, was mostly contemplation. The second day was pure ego backlash and surrendering to reality (doing the dirty painful work), the third day was focusing on concentration and labeling, getting in touch with my senses, the forth day so far had been mostly contemplation and self inquiry. Some strange ones you might see are experimental: 1. Praying in tongue: my father is a passionate Christian, I wanted to try his prayer technique for the pursuit of attaining enlightenment. Basically how you do it is let your auditory thoughts talk, like a stream of speaking, it might sound very alien. it isn't limited to the speed, vowels, pitch, or volume. Mine tends to turn into a type of singing and eventually screaming, I literally feel like a dragon shooting a beam of light and words out of my mouth. Totally shocked me how powerful it was when done in the mind. Basically it feels like my intuition, my true self is helping me put me in a state where I can see an obvious shift in physical reality and question it , leading to self inquiry. This is not to be underestimated 2. Contemplate blessings: basically you contemplate how awesome and lucky your life is, how proud of you you are, etc. So far this has worked and put me in a state of mind for the rest of the day in my retreat. 3. Cold shower SDS (strong determination sitting): a more intense and quick version of normal SDS. Pretty powerful, but also very painful. Gives you a clear mind and peaceful mind at the end. Only do in short bursts! One more thing, sometimes if I don't know what to do next, I'll set the timer for an hour, organically let my mind figure out what it wants to do, then note down what it turns out to be. So the end result might become labeling, self inquiry, SDS, or praying in tongues, etc. Basically, really make the day formal and spartan like, super mindful, and experiment what works best for you. We would love to hear how it works for you at the end of your home made retreat

(I'm practicing my story telling. Here's a short story I wrote up.) Everyone knows Superman has the stupidest disguise ever. Why doesn’t everyone recognize him considering all he wears are a pair of glasses? The secret is that Superman actually uses a hypnosis-beam on everyone around him. This beam bounces through Superman’s glasses and gives everyone Prosopagnosia, or face blindness, such that they literally do not see him for who he is. Considering how He's destroyed a solar system with a sneeze, shattered reality itself with a punch, and even escaped a blackhole, Superman finds it tough to find entertainment at times. I mean, the best games require challenge, and so does the game of life. More and more, Superman wonders what it would be like to be truly human until one day, his curiosity over takes him. Superman looks at himself in the mirror and uses the hypo beam on himself. Zap! Superman stopped being superman and only Clark Kent remained. Clark has hidden memories of what it was like to be Superman, but since he’s can’t recognize himself his identity, all he knows is that he feels some type of indescribable incompleteness. Try as he might, nothing fills up this incompleteness. Fantasizing about to Lois Lane doesn’t Help. Working up the Career ladder at the Daily Planet doesn’t help. Alcohol doesn’t help. Nothing lets Clark feel infinite again. People begin to look at Clark weird (Remember, everyone around him now sees Superman Moping about, walking instead of flying, acting as if he can’t do anything to help himself, and stuck inside his own mind). Now that he's become human, Clark feels more Alien than ever. Clark gets depressive and begins to zone out. Lois is skeptical - Why has her Superman started acting this way? She pulls Clark to the side on day at the office. “I don’t know what kind of shenanigans you’re trying to pull off, but it’s weird. You’re not acting like yourself. I don’t like it.You don't like it. No one likes it. Maybe you should go see the MetaHuman Doctor.” When Clark tells the MetaHuman Doctor about his feelings of physical incompleteness, anxiety over small problems, and inability to look people in the eye confidently, the doctor simply laughs. “Is this some kind of joke?” Clark gets visibly upset when he sees the Doctor's’ incredulity. At that moment, the Doctor realizes that Superman is being dead serious. He’s actually convinced himself that he’s Clark. That is, he’s not going to be able to tap into his superhuman abilities to help others until he snaps out of this delusion. Worse, a deluded superman is capable of killing the world in order to try to recreate the feeling of being superman. The joke is suddenly not funny. The Doctor smiles and tells Clark pain medication is unnecessary, as it would only be treating the symptoms and not the root cause. Clark tells the doctor that this makes no sense - "What is a sickness if not the symptoms? Perhaps, You mean that my problems are chemical instead of psychological." No, The Doctor tells Clark. That’s not the issue. In fact, the Doctor continues, there's weirder news: the symptoms aren’t even symptoms of anything, really – he’s acting like a normal person. The truth is that there’s nothing to fix in the first place. Clark just has to pay attention to who or what he actually is to realize that he’s been infinitely strong this whole time. Clark doesn’t get it. In fact, he gets mad at the suggestion that there’s nothing to fix – clearly there’s something to fix or else he would have never gone to the doctor! The doctor grabs Clark by the shoulders, looks him dead in the eye and tells him the truth: Clark, there's nothing to fix because You already transcend what it means to be human. You are a god. You are immortal. You always have been and always will be. You’re getting upset over nothing other than your own stories for what you think you are. If you remember who you are, where you came from, and what you did to get to this point, your problems as Clark Kent will become a mere joke to you. The world needs you to remember who you are - an immortal being - so that you can go back to helping others and stop focusing so much on completing Clark Kent. “You think I’m a god?” Clark looks at the Doctor like the Doctor is the one who’s insane “I thought you were supposed to be a man of science.” The doctor sighed. There’s nothing you can say to someone who’s not willing to listen. “Apparently, they’ll let complete nuts run clinics these days,” Clark says as he walks out, slamming the door behind him. He chooses not to notice that the door turned into pure sawdust from his strength. "Telling me that there's no problem when I stand here in torture is simply more torture." Clark leaves the building and presses a button to cross the street. A kid stands next to him, playing with a bouncy ball. Clark continues to curse under his breathe. “Why doesn’t anyone help me? First Lois tells me I’m not acting myself and then the Doctor tell me nothing’s wrong. I’m just Clark Kent – I’m not some superhero. What did I do to deserve this bullshit?” At that moment the kid’s bouncy ball hits off Clarks shoe and into the traffic. The kid runs out to chase the ball, not thinking whatsoever. Clark’s eyes open as he watches things unfold in slow motion. No one else can help - it's not his kid but it is his responsibility. He runs out. BAM! A huge bus hits Clark just as he manages to reach the child. He saw It for one second. His entire life flashes before his eyes. He sees the Truth – the whole universe in front of him – what he actually is. Then he wakes up, unscathed. And he gets it. Not matter what’s happened, he’s always been alive. The same way the sun always rises and the birds always fly, he’s had to be alive to see it happen. There’s never been a time he’s aware of where he’s not been alive. There’s no reason to be anxious, there’s no reason to think he’s weak, there’s no reason to remain unconfident – that’s all part of a character named Clark. In truth, he’s Superman. It never mattered what the Doctor told Clark. It wasn’t until Clark got by a bus that it all made sense. The doctor could have shouted YOU ARE IMMORTAL into Clarks face one thousand times but none of that would come close to the direct experience of what it means to be Superman. It’s not like recognizing who he is actually changed anything about Superman’s life as Clark. He still works at the Daily Planet. He still has a crush on Lois Lane. He still likes coffee. But his experiential grasp of his true nature does change his perspective on things. Specifically, Clark Kent won’t be limited to the same types of actions now that he remembers that he is. The next day, Clark saunters in the office with a certain pep. As he turns the corner, a plucky intern runs around the corner and directly into him, spilling coffee on his shirt. “Watch where you’re going, asshole!” the kid yells out. Does Clark get mad? Yes, a little bit at first. I mean, the its the kid who was run But he’s then he thinks “who gives a shit, I’m Superman. I could snap this guy’s spine in two, but it actually feels better not to." It sucks to live a life where you’re never going to know what it’s like to be Superman. "Honestly I acted like a jackass too when I felt like that. In fact, it sucks so much that I’ll help him clean up despite him acting like a fool." So Clark continues on being Superman and Clark, knowing the Truth, yet never able to completely state it or else people might freak out. His strength was always there, but his awareness made all the difference. Having the experience of being human makes being Superman that much better: He no longer feels as bored but he also has greater empathy for the humans-waiting-to-be-superhumans around him.

Hey guys, I have a really silly issue. Conscious work ungrounds me to a certain extent, after contemplating for a while, and my brain uses this to its advantage to just plainly piss me off. One way is it says "wow you truly don't know whether or not the laws of physics are real, like theres a high chance but you have no idea. That's a fact. That means it's perfectly possible for an alien to pop out of no where and kill you. That's perfectly possible" This scares the shit out of me, particularly when I'm home alone trying to go to bed. This issue is ridiculous but any advice? Thanks

An "alien" Will never pop up of no where and try to kill you. Advanced extratterestrials don't have evil intentions. If they had, the earth would not be here anymore, it would be destroyed in a nanosecond if they choosed to. We as humans are more dangerous than those "aliens" because of the fear programming. When we transcend the fear we can actually connect with peaceful extraterrestrials, if you have fear it's very unlikely that you Will perceive them. But the mainstream media Will not tell you this. It's main concern is to maintain the fear in the masses. And those thoughts that you're describing are most probably been programmed in you by the mainstream media. If consciousness work makes you fear ghosts and "aliens", your expanding thinking not awarness during your consciusness work. If your were expanding awarness you would be open and accepting if a ghost or an "alien" showed up. It would not disturb you at all. What disturbs you is the thought that pops up in your awarness. The identification with this thought. Polarity. When your identified with thoughts you are expanding their meaning after a thought pops up. When your identified with ego(thought,belief, perception, interpretation....) you can get lost in this meaning unable to shift your awarness. Awarness cannot disturb you. What's happening to you is normal. It's a purging process. Keep on expanding your awarness. It gets worse before it gets better.

This is my recount of my first experience with psilocybin mushrooms. I took psilocybin mushrooms for the first time in late June 2017. I woke up a bit after 4:30 am in the morning. I made sure to go to the bathroom and get a bottle of water before the trip as I did not want anything to interrupt it. I retrieved my psilocybin mushrooms and weighed exactly 5 grams of dried Psilocybe Cubensis mushrooms. Before I ingested the fungus I took about five minutes to sit in silent meditation. My room was also in complete silent darkness as psilocybin preforms best in this environment. During these five minutes I listened to some calm music and mentally prepared myself to completely let go of everything. I got into a mindset in which I was ready to die; right there and right then. I was ready to be completely obliterated. After this meditation of complete surrender I turned off all technology around me. I paused out of respect for the fungus, I then looked at the mushrooms and said “I will go wherever you take me, with grace”, and then I ate the mushrooms. They actually tasted quite good. After eating the mushrooms I then got into lotus position and meditated at the edge of my bed. This was one of the stillest meditations I had ever had. It was almost as if my body knew the profundity of what was to come. After about 20 minutes of silent meditation in darkness I felt the first effects of the psilocybin. My body began to feel heavy and I felt a tingling all over my body especially in my spine and in my head. I then leaned my back against the wall as I meditated. I began to feel nauseous as well; I was prepared for this as I had a vomit bucket next to me. As the effects intensified I then had to lie down flat on my back. The effects became more intense. As I laid down I immediately got in a bilateral symmetrical position. Somehow I knew that this was going to be very important. I remembered listening to interviews with Martin Ball and the importance of bilateral symmetry during psychedelic experiences. Then the weirdest and most profound experience of my life began. As I laid in the silent darkness of my room on my back with my eyes closed it was as if my ego structure was sucked right out of my mind in an instant. Through no volition of my own my body began to contort into various bilateral symmetrical poses very similar to the ones that martin ball discussed. It was an extremely strange yet beautiful experience. I had no control over these movements and it felt like the psilocybin had possessed my body. My nerves were tingling the entire time this happened. I could feel my nervous system trying to balance itself as the psilocybin entered. As my body continued to contort into these various poses they became more wild and intense, it felt as if the psilocybin was testing the waters. It was entering my body and trying to see how it could take control of my nervous system and guide me. It felt to me that it was trying to get accustomed used to being in a human body. My perception of time dissolved as well. When I opened my eyes I saw intense visuals in a grid like pattern overlaid on my vision. At this point I could see the light from the sunrise through the blinds in my room. As I peered out it was so bright. Brighter than anything I had ever seen yet so beautiful. The bodily contortions slowed and I heard an intuitive voice say something along the lines of “ok, that was your introduction, now are you ready for what I have to show you?” There was no ego present however I knew that this was about to get very intense. At this point I don’t really know how to describe what happened as there was no ego and no sense of time. But I will do my best to recount. My consciousness / awareness was then catapulted outside of space and time in a void of complete nothingness. I then heard the intuitive voice say something along the lines of, “I need you to understand the profundity of the things that I am showing you.” “People rarely get to experience things like this.” In the nothingness a light formed and I was that light and the witness of the light at the same time. The ego then tried to ask questions to try and understand, label and interpret what was occurring. The psilocybin did not like this at all. Immediately as the questions of the ego arose the experience began to turn negative. In the void I saw red and black vivid colors emerge. I saw hundreds of psychedelic demons come into existence and general chaos ensue. Keep in mind that I was the colors and demons and chaos. The ego of Thomas roger became concerned at this and tried again to ask questions and understand. But it was as if the psilocybin said “NO!” “You will wait until I am finished showing you what you need to see before you begin to intellectualize any of this!” “Simply sit back, experience and observe this.” After the psilocybin said this, the ego of Thomas-Roger was obliterated in a sea of destruction and chaos. I felt the pain and agony of being completely ripped apart in every way possible. The ego was screaming at the top of its lungs. The ego screamed out into the void and was abruptly silenced. The ego was dissolved and transmuted into the chaos that had annihilated it and the immense pain was turned into infinite bliss that I had never felt before. Now that the ego was not going to be a factor anymore in this experience I was now the light in the void. However even after this there was still a witness of awareness. At this moment I felt as if I was everything in existence. Then the psilocybin said “ok, great, now we can continue.” As the experience went on my awareness/ consciousness began to traverse the multiverse with the psilocybin as my guide. I was shown the intricacies of our illusory concepts of space and time. I was shown that all is absolutely ONE. Next even more strange occurrences ensued. I was shown a massive psychedelic “city” made of pure light that existed outside of the multiverse, space and time. This “city” of light was large enough to make Earth look tiny in comparison. The psilocybin guided my awareness through this place. I saw technologies made of what I can only describe as light. I saw technologies so inconceivably advanced that they would make the greatest human technological marvels look like less than stone age tools. All throughout this “city” were beings of pure light. Some of them were humanoid in shape some of them were so alien in appearance that I can’t even begin to describe them. These beings could bring things into existence simply by thinking of it. They could travel anywhere in the multiverse by teleporting. They created worlds for fun. The psilocybin told me that I (awareness/consciousness) could do this as well. I saw many other things here that I can’t even begin to describe with language. All I can say is that this was a beautiful place of love and light. The most memorable thing that I saw in this place was a vast library of all of the knowledge in the multiverse. It was like a cathedral and a library made of pure light. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I lack the vocabulary to describe just how beautiful it was. After seeing this beautiful place of love and light at one point I was shown a nexus of information in which streams of information were pouring out at an extremely fast speed in all directions. This information consisted of every way that we humans use symbols to communicate information. This included but was not limited to all forms of language and all forms of mathematics. I felt at this time that I knew all languages, all modes of communication and all relays of information. Information was everywhere. From the sub atomic to the molecular all the way up to the multiverse. I saw information in DNA helixes, plants, animals, myself and everything else. I (consciousness/awareness) literally knew everything. At this point I experienced the most intense and breathtaking part of the experience. I felt like I experienced everything that had ever happened in all of existence simultaneously in less than a second. It was so powerful that the witnessing awareness/ consciousness was obliterated. The witness was the last vestige of anything resembling duality at all. Now there was only the happenings of existence and I (pure nothingness) was all of those happenings. It was as if I had created existence and decided to experience existence in every way possible. From bacteria to entire civilizations spanning light years, every life, every breath, every experience was one. And I was that one. It’s very hard to describe with the limits of human language, but I will continue. I felt like this experience lasted hundreds of millions of years. It was so vast and visceral. I lived as thousands of people, plants, fungi, bacteria and animals. I saw entire alien civilizations rise from the stone age to type three civilizations and fall. I lived as various men, women and children. In all of these experiences there were vast, various things constantly changed about them but one thing remained the same. The consciousness that was experiencing life remained. I don’t really know how to describe that. I experienced childbirth from both the perspective of the mother organism giving birth and from the perspective of the child organism being born. I experienced sex from both the male and female perspective simultaneously. I felt both masculine and feminine energies as ONE. I felt how integral sexuality was to existence and just how profoundly divine sexuality is. Sexuality is not simply a bond between a male and a female. Sexuality is a vector in which novelty can be introduced into the universe and existence as a whole. All of the millions of experiences and perspectives were happening so fast and it was impossible to keep up with the experience. It was moving so fast that it was overwhelming it was a sea of chaos and yet I was this sea of chaos. After all of this profound stimulation everything returned to the void. This void felt like infinity. I was in this experience for eons. It was unborn and undying. I was this void of absolute nothingness from which everything stemmed and I was that void. After experiencing eternity in the void of absolute nothingness standard reality began to form. Thus commenced the comedown phase of the experience. The witnessing consciousness reformed. I came back into my body. My body felt extremely heavy and difficult to control. My mind went from states of being conscious to unconscious. Slowly my perception of reality shifted from that of cosmic consciousness to that of human consciousness; however my perception was still nondual. I felt all of the information that I had witnessed being embedded into my nervous system. My whole body was vibrating as I began to come back. My head was ringing/buzzing for the entire rest of the day. This headache did not go away until the next day. As I slowly came back to physical reality all of my bodily senses were very sensitive. I felt everything so vividly. It was very intense to even feel my body lying on the bed. Feeling the air being pulled into and pushed out of my body was also very intense in a way that I can’t really describe. I was so immersed in tactile sensations that I began to feel the bed very gently. It felt like this was my first time touching something. As I tried to get up I fell several times over a dozen before I was even able to get to my knees. As I looked around my room I felt completely in shock. The best way I can describe how I felt at this time is I felt l how the character David did at the end of the movie, 2001: A Space Odyssey, after he had come out of the stargate. My room looked like an alien environment to me. I felt like I was seeing it for the very first time. I had not felt like this since I was a baby. As I looked around I thought it was VERY strange that anything was happening at all. I thought that it was very strange that we humans could not simply do whatever we wanted whenever we wanted. I then looked at my hands and I was blown away. I saw the complexity and strangeness of the biological machine that I was looking at. It was very amazing. I struggled to get to my feet. After falling about 6 more times I finally managed to barely stand up. I was amazed at how my body was working. I was amazed that I even had a body. I looked at my bookshelf and I was almost in reverence for it. I nearly cried when I looked at it. Reason being, after seeing that library of light during my experience, I have a newfound respect for information. I had to use the bathroom afterwards so I slowly walked to the bathroom. Walking wasn’t easy after the trip. When I entered the bathroom and saw my reflection in the mirror the first thing I thought was WHAT THE FUCK?! It was so strange to see a body looking at me. It was so strange to see a body at all. Again it was like I had never seen a human body before. On my body I saw visuals like patterns and glyphs moving all over. However the visuals were the least of my concern. They were cool and interesting to observe but I was more mesmerized by the fact that I had a body at all. My body looked like an alien organism to me. After using the bathroom I asked my trip sitter what happened to my body. He said that for the most part after the contorting poses I was passed out. He said that at one point that I began flailing, grabbing things and swinging them around and making incoherent noises. It surprised me that I was not screaming at the top of my lungs at one point during the experience. This is because when the ego was being obliterated I could have sworn that I was screaming at the top of my lungs in complete agony. After learning from my trip sitter that most of my trip consisted of my body simply lying there I was ok with that. I walked around my home feeling like this was my first time seeing it. I decided to walk outside in the backyard and when I did it was a bit overwhelming. I marveled at all of the lifeforms outside. I simply sat in the grass in awe of the planet I had just returned to. All in all the psilocybin experience lasted for nearly six hours. It was the strangest, deepest, most profound and most beautiful experience of my life thus far. This experience forever changed the way I look at reality and it has supercharged my existing meditation practice. Psychedelics are really an amazing tool for learning, consciousness exploration and enlightenment work. They can lead to many beautiful things if the student is ready for the lesson. Here is a video explaining the positions that my body was contorting into. Skip to about 5:25 in. The grid visuals I experienced during the come up portion were very similar to this. https://nexusoflife.deviantart.com/art/Thermodynamic-Horizon-76214599 This is what the "city" of light was similar to. https://nexusoflife.deviantart.com/art/ET-Contact-676996115 This is what the visuals overlaid on my body looked similar to. https://nexusoflife.deviantart.com/art/Vitis-Animae-264377166

Does this mean you can prepare for the next life? And if you become fully enlightened, will you forget that in the next life, so it will be an infinite cycle of pain, misery and hapiness through all possible conscious states, whether it's through an alien or a tree? Do you get these kinds of insights from this experience?

Really doubt it's an alien if it looks anything similar to human biologi

I would like to hear some your childhood spiritual experiences. I only read about depersonalization about 5 years ago, and I had to let go of a lot of these profound magical experiences I interpreted as being divine. Likely as a result of a severe anxiety/depressive disorder, I had sometimes bizzare windows into what I thought was a spiritual inquiry. I think this was a way of my brain dealing with trauma as a child, but to this day I still experience some depersonalization from time to time but nothing on the magnitude of what I've experienced before. Sometimes I wake up in this state, things seem bizzare, alien, or sometimes even serene and tranquil. I've never had a frightening depersonalization episode like others have described. They are normally states I enjoy being in and would attempt at times to induce it, but there is no mechanism that I'm aware of, it just happens, or is likely to happen under certain conditions. During these episodes my mind gets quiet, deathly silent, I'm detached, usually in a state of bliss, and I have a very pleasant feeling of just existing, in these moments I feel so utterly complete and content I want to stay in this place forever. It feels like discovery almost, like finding a tranquil grove in the woods after wading through rough brush and difficult terrain. Other times it feels like I'm in an alien world, like things are bizzare and the mind is active and questioning everything, there is confusion. Other episodes feel like there is an entity with me, like a divine presence, but there is very limited thoughts in these states, it's like my background of scrolling thoughts just ceases, it's like you are just existing without thoughts or ideas about who you are, where your going, what happened in your past, what will happen in the future. Large wide open spaces seem to trigger me, and it's more likely to happen if I'm alone than with others, but it's not required. Normally, it just occurs out of no where, anytime, any reason, though sometimes it occurs after a significantly stressful few days. The episodes can last hours or minutes. I had thought that these were profound and "special" experiences. It plays into my ego perfectly. It fits in with the "I am unique and mysterious" paradigm I created. I've let this stuff go for the most part, but it's interesting that it occurs and still occurs. I think it's a defense mechanism that provides me comfort in difficult times. I wouldn't mind hearing if any others have experiences like these.

Had a dream experience that absolutely verified him for me, I made a forum about him as well. www.bashar-forum.org The guy who channels him is a bit of hard head though imo in terms of not spreading the material for free and using a very outdated business model, but if you can look past that (and maybe join some sharing group, cough) then it's pretty cool. The only other downside I'll give is that the alien is actually a bit unnuanced at times and can easily be misinterpreted.

Reason for posting this is because of the number of reoccurring reporting of OOBE, encounter with entities with alien like creatures or deceased loved ones, feelings of warmth and peace. Pulled from Wiki: Common elements Researchers have identified the common elements that define near-death experiences. Bruce Greyson argues that the general features of the experience include impressions of being outside one's physical body, visions of deceased relatives and religious figures, and transcendence of egotic and spatiotemporal boundaries. Many common elements have been reported, although the person's interpretation of these events often corresponds with the cultural, philosophical, or religious beliefs of the person experiencing it. For example, in the USA, where 46% of the population believes in guardian angels, they will often be identified as angels or deceased loved ones (or will be unidentified), while Hindus will often identify them as messengers of the god of death. Although the features of NDEs vary from one case to the next, common traits that have been reported by NDErs are as follows: A sense/awareness of being dead. A sense of peace, well-being and painlessness. Positive emotions. A sense of removal from the world. An out-of-body experience. A perception of one's body from an outside position. Sometimes observing medical professionals performing resuscitation efforts. A "tunnel experience" or entering a darkness. A sense of moving up, or through, a passageway or staircase. A rapid movement toward and/or sudden immersion in a powerful light (or "Being of Light") which communicates with the person. An intense feeling of unconditional love and acceptance. Encountering "Beings of Light", "Beings dressed in white", or similar. Also, the possibility of being reunited with deceased loved ones. Receiving a life review, commonly referred to as "seeing one's life flash before one's eyes". Receiving knowledge about one's life and the nature of the universe. Approaching a border, or a decision by oneself or others to return to one's body, often accompanied by a reluctance to return. Suddenly finding oneself back inside one's body. Connection to the cultural beliefs held by the individual, which seem to dictate some of the phenomena experienced in the NDE and particularly the later interpretation thereof. Stages Kenneth Ring (1980) subdivided the NDE on a five-stage continuum. The subdivisions were: Peace Body separation Entering darkness Seeing the light Entering the light He stated that 60% experienced stage 1 (feelings of peace and contentment), but only 10% experienced stage 5 ("entering the light"). According to Alana Karran, the NDE stages resemble the so-called hero's journey.

Maybe if we encounter an alien civilization with a far more developed brain than ours, we will know the answer. Our imaginations might indeed be limited by the brain. Maybe there are an infinite amount of those civilization who are infinitely more developed and have access to infinite higher realities than we think is possible. But wouldn't they also be part of that same infinite One?

How abou cooking an alien dish you're excited to try with some jazz in teh background supported with cold wine followed by making out?

@Real Eyes That's a good question. I have never taken any drug in my life, so I also never investigated it. Drugs was simply a no-go area in my life. This changed when Leo started talking about psychedelics. His video about AL-LAD convinced me to try it out, because it looked like a good starting point. The problem though was to do a trip, I required myself to take a whole day's time, and the next day no work, which restricts me to Saturdays. I haven't had many Saturdays completely free for myself, and I'm not gonna trip when I need to take care of my son. Another problem was my wife. She is even more dogmatic about drugs than I was. Doing a trip isn't something I can hide from her, nor should I want to hide it. So it took me some courage to tell her, and while she doesn't agree with me doing it, she told me she trusts me in whatever I do. So far I have 2x taken AL-LAD. The first time was 75µg, just to see how I would respond to a low dose. Nothing much happened, except for maybe slightly more awareness. The second time was 150µg. No noteworthy visuals, but much more awareness. I was in a peaceful state, listened to some music, but nothing profound, no insights or anything. Near the end of the trip I didn't know what to do anymore so I watched some TV with my wife, and it was a show about celebrities. I remember ridiculing all those celebreties and their petty problems, it all looked so alien to me. On the other hand I don't need drugs to see that . Both trips didn't have any lasting effect on me as far as I know, and I don't think they have anything to do with the awakening I've had. But who knows. In my next trip I wanted to try a 300µg dose, and that was actually the trip I was waiting for and expected to actually get some results from it and hopefully some insights. My desire to do this has dramatically diminished, because I already got what I was looking for, but I'm gonna do it anyway. I now know there is even more to discover. Even though I don't really desire any more discovery, doesn't mean that I shouldn't.