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Okey.. lets start with the fact that i am commited to this path, i found it interested form the beggining. im still in a very low point of course, but, sure my life has changed a lot since i embarked on board. But a question that i still have difficulty to answer is how to deal with people, close to you (or not), which can't open their minds to such possilities. At first i was getting mad, but soon i realized that if i get mad i haven't any difference from them except the beliefs, nowadays as i try to raise my consciousness i start to feel compassion for their suffering. But even if you dont get mad, even i you are compassionate. how do you deal with people which you have repeatedly told them about the possiblity of self actualization, they look at you like an alien, and they tell you about their "problems" again and again. should i tell him/her how he/she could approach this problem better? but get mad about me bacause i cant understant? or should i just agree with them and give them a shitty surface solution or not give any suggestions at all (oh yea i undesrtand, thats sucks). im sure all of us who have taken this path and have a glimpse of the possibilities of it, have faced this kind of issues. im just asking opinions of what is a helpfull approach that is best both for you and them. sorry for my english

@WindInTheLeaf You can tell often times both by what people write about and how they write it. For example, if somebody writes a lot about 2C-B, LSD, mushrooms, etc. and gives a lot of trip reports, they're likely a psychonaut. If somebody constantly questions non-duality and demands peer-reviewed scientific evidence on any claim (that was me for a long time), they're probably an armchair skeptic. I've met all of these different types of people at some point, and if you meet enough of them in real life, you know how to recognize them in other formats like this forum. These are labels of course, and there is a lot of overlapping. The main point I was making was this forum has a rich variety of people that make it an interesting place to visit and learn from. Where I live, the vast majority of the people go to Protestant churches, vote Republican every election, listen to country music exclusively, eat friend greasy foods regularly, live for tailgating and football season, drive gigantic pickup trucks, and have health problems due to obesity and alcoholism. I feel like an alien living here, so it's great to have places like this where you know people care about the same things you do like the nature of existence, the welfare of our planet, and the ending of suffering.

@Alien A) Of course any insight had while tripping can be had without tripping. B) Don't confuse an intellectual insight of the mind with Direct Consciousness. It's one thing to imagine that the universe is infinite. That's easy. Anyone child can do that. It's a totally nother thing to actually become infinite yourself and transcend your mortality. You should make a distinction between intellectual realizations and changes to your physical level of being. You can think about infinity all day long. But that is not infinity. That is finity.

Thanks guys. I'll have to listen to these later once I get home. (don't want to interrupt the music my friend's mom is playing) Things are a little awkward right now (we haven't really talked to each other since we got here) We are just packing up his stuff at his house to put up into storage. It's a little weird seeing pictures of him.. His mom cries at every one she grabs... I don't know how to react to it right now... so I just hug her till she stops and keep packing... It all feels so alien to me right now... Neither of us wants to go near his room right now... so I think we have both non verbally agreed to leave it for last... But I'm feeling a little better today, being out of my house.

Recently I had my last day of high school, and so my mind naturally became sentimental in thinking about the past. I want know what the best ways are to understand the unconscious motivations driving me. Skip to the end if you can't be bothered to read. Im gonna write a lot. Why I'm asking this question and a bit about me I've realised that I understand very little about why my experiences happened the way they did, and I can't figure out what I was chasing after back then and what I'm chasing after now. Whilst the details of my memories aren't incredibly sharp in terms of precise mundane details, I have a very detailed and rich memory of important phases of my life during high school and the underlying emotions I felt at the time. Although I say that I understand very little about my past it's probably the case that I understand a lot about my experiences, it's just that I don't want to accept and confront the fact that I've always felt like an alien/outsider in my interactions with people. The feeling of being misunderstood and lonely, subtly yet strongly, permeates all of my experiences in school from when I was 4 years old to now when I am 17. It might be worth noting that I'm an INTP who suffers from anxiety/depression, and I've got a parent was/is abusive to me (to only describe the relationship with the word "abusive" wouldn't accurately convey the nuanced situation however). This parent of mine is very paranoid and holds delusional suspicions (which are not targeted at me), and I have a strong history of mental illness from one of my parent's side of the family. I some autistic traits which I have inhereted from one of my parents, but I would probably be what you call "high functioning". My past experiences There is far too much I can say here, so my explanation will likely be cut short and incoherent since there's a lot in my mind (emotions, particular memories) which I can't articulate well. I'll talk a bit about my experiences, by first starting with primary school [ which I was in when aged 4-11 years old]. For a reason unbeknownst to me, I was a very shy kid by the time I was 4. Apparently I was very late to speak as a baby, which is maybe a consequence of autism. From the very start of primary school, I was mildly bullied and was socially excluded. Although I can't pinpoint a reason for this, I think this happened because of the fact I behaved strangely as a child. Although I behaved strangely, it was far from being malicious or violent. By the age of 6-7, the bullying stopped and as I mildly gained the respect of people around me. Around the age of 7 I naturally developed a very strong interest in maths, and this has stuck with me for life. It was something I was constantly praised for by adults. Thankfully I wasn't bullied for this at all in primary school. Even after I stopped being bullied, I was at the bottom of the "social hierarchy". I was often peoples last choice for playing games with, and it felt as though I had to always make an effort to fit in and get people to play with me. I finished high school at age 11. I didn't stay in touch with anyone from primary school. At age 11 I then entered a private high school. When my first year started, I found that I was being popular for reasons I didn't understand. It might be because I was blunt and would tell offensive but funny jokes, and represented a paradox of maturity and immaturity. I was really good at tackling people in rugby even though I was short, and so the sporty kids loved me for that. I was friends with the "jocks" and "the nerds" at the same time. I was tired of being nerd earlier in my life, so I tried to fit in with the cool kids. However, they weren't really on my wavelength at all. I found them to be superficial and shallow beyond belief. They shared different hobbies from me for the most part. They were allowed to have girlfriends whilst I have had the opposite sex demonised to me because of my upbringing. The "cool kids" detected that I wasn't on their wavelength as well, but I maintained a casual relationship with them for two years. Although I interacted with the cool kids, it was the "nerds" who were my real homes. I just went to the "cool kids" temporarily if they were doing some fun activity like playing football or rugby. During my second year of high school I developed a major crush for someone, but I couldn't pursue anything because of my religion. She was really good looking and gave me signals (e.g. She was touching my leg repeatedly with her foot under the table) , but I never did anything. This led to me having great frustration. I ended up question religion as a whole during my adolescence, a became an atheist at age 14. Something at the centre of my being rejected everything about the way the "jocks" acted. They were arrogant, genuinely malicious at times, and wanted to put whoever they could down around them. And for the first two years of school, I had two close friends. These two guys happened to be the two highest academic achievers in all subjects, whilst I only "shined" in maths and science. Despite this, we had many similar interests and fun playing games with each other. They were on my wavelength. After two years, I had drifted away from the cool kids. After two years my loneliness started to grow. When interacting with the vast vast majority of people I felt like an outsider. During my third year of high school, I fell down the dominance hierarchy, quickly spiralling down towards the bottom. During my third year of school, people were put into different classes of "ability". I was separated from my friends for science classes because I never bothered to study. One of the two close friends I had started drifting away to hang out with the girls, and I didn't follow him. I was too awkward and my religion hindered me. Plus the girls he choose to hang out with were unpleasant, gossipy people. I had just one friend left, and I didn't end up seeing him too often. This friend that I had left was Asian and Muslim like me, (unsurprisingly?). My interests were in discussing philisophy, religion, science, psychology, politics and etc but nobody elses were. Whether it was sitting in classes, eating lunch, and walking to classes, I was lonely. Rooms would be full with multiple cliques (nerds, normals, jocks, etc) of people talking loudly, I would be awkwardly at the side. I watched from the sidelines everyone enjoy their life. Hung out with nerds, but didn't really feel connected to them. As high school went on, my loneliness grew and grew. During my 6-7th years of high school my classes became small and I was mostly interacting with nerds all the time. I took only science subjects and maths, and I had my friends in these classes. My curiosity for maths and science really bloomed during these, and people were shocked at how "intelligent" I was because my grades aren't usually good. I went to a private school filled with people who were very competitive and hardworking academically. I have a circle of 10 "friends" and some of them were envious of me and put me down for my interest in maths. Most of the teachers were unable to answer the questions I asked them, and whenever I tried discussing something I find really interesting in maths/physics with my friends I would get cut off, because they perceived my interest and enthusiasm for the abstract as a form of showing off. If I ever go full loose in showing my train of thought to people, they are sometimes spiteful and look at me as weird. And so I naturally became more and more lonely, as I felt rejected by everyone around me. On a side note, I hate the way information is taught in school, and that demotivated me from learning and growing as much as I could. I'll hopefully be studying physics at university later this year. My question How can I understand the forces which drive my behaviour? Practicing mindfulness is something very very very important, and I plan to develop myself as a whole. Our mind can react to sensations and feelings in our consciousness in automated ways which we don't consciously register. But I want to know what I can do outside of (meditation) /(consciousness training) to understand myself. What books are best? What theory do I need? What ways of thinking should I use in dissecting my past experiences? I want to know why it is I don't fit in. It because of my mbti type? (I'm an INTP). Is it because of my score on the big five scale? Agreeableness: 1st percentile Compassion: 4th percentile Politeness: 1st percentile Conscientiousness: 0th percentile Industriousness: 0th percentile Orderliness: 2nd percentile Extraversion: 22nd percentile Enthusiasm: 13th percentile Assertiveness: 41st percentile Neuroticism: 92nd percentile Withdrawal: 98th percentile Volatility: 63rd percentile Openness to Experience: 97th percentile Intellect: 94th percentile Openness: 95th percentile

Fair point, although i wonder if there are some sentient beings which a car indeed could NOT hurt. (For example, for all we know some extraterrestrial life could be so alien to us that we can't even interact with them, including with cars. Or maybe the Earth herself has some kind of subjective experience... Although im sure she would dislike cars smh global warming). "Objective" to me actually means what is the nature of something regardless of any life form / subjective perspective of it. This almost necessitates that there is no objectivity. What does a car look like ovjectively, despite any subjective take on it? Pure nothingness, black hole singularity etc. Tbf the question doesn't make sense... to look like something requires subjectivity. You would think "well mass energy charge and other fundamental qualities etc of an object (like the ability to run humans over) ARE objectively intrinsic qualities of those objects"... which makes perfect sense from our human intuition... however modern physics is strongly supporting that things have no intrinsic qualities on their own independent of the observation of them. There aren't even any "things" independent of our experience of them. For example, the photon that was not in a location / in every location / transcended "location" that was suddenly in spot A when observed... There wasn't actually a photon doing any of that, only the appearance of a photon (and the appearance of a scientist looking for the photon...) Similarly for a car running @Faceless over and killing him. Not to act like it's nbd.... The pain would appear to be real as would the grief it caused to all of us actualizers who enjoy reading his far out posts!

So I smoked weed with my friend today and as I was walking back home ( I was still high ) I started feeling like theres a presence and feelings or vibrations that you tap into when youre high that you can't access when you're sober, I get this feeling a lot when I smoke weed, it feels like how I would imagine I would be if one thing was different about our planet like a different amount of different gases or the size of the earth was a bit smaller or bigger and it made humans evolve into me ( like our ancestors have hadthe best genes so survived and created us ). I don't know if it makes sense to people who don't smoke weed Basically, it feel as if I'm an alien or like I have different eyes. Something about my experience whilst I'm high feels very raw and fragile, i know how crazy this sounds btw lol. So then I figured hold on I'm getting these messages in the form of my own thoughts, only it didn't feel like it came from me. I felt as if there was some sort of presence that I tapped into. And my consciousness/ experience was very raw here like a snake shedding its skin in this state. It told me things. Like " It's not eaten with a spoon ". My natural reaction to this was that it's reffering to enlightenment. You cannot eat it and feel good from it and it's not done using the conventional ego desire system in our experience. So, you can't consume enlightenment and it cannot be eaten and cannot be grasped by our human domination on the earth with tools. Am I making any sense? Also it told me "you choose the voice in your head" So my thoughts and beliefs are in my control so I better make positive ones. I felt as if related to my social anxiety and negative attitude and neuroris in general. Then when the weed was coming down I felt like it was an angel talking to the ego mind from god. This sounds weird I know. Maybe angels are thoughts or that voice that tells you to meditate or when you have a realisation about reality and your experience( possibly a kensho experience ) And the devil might be the enticing thoughts and energy and desires that keep you attached. So far the devil has won. Anyone had experiences like this? Lol I felt so crazy whilst this was happening lol :DD Edit: Also this was sparked after I left my friends to go home. I started thinking that they weren't really my true friends. The guy I was with most of the day was a dickhead to me like making fun of me and shit and Idk didn't seem like there was love there you know between people. He seemed very acidic to me. I think this because he kept calling me a retard whilst i was making jokes and shit and kept saying i need to slap you. And when he was on the phone to my friend he was talking bad about me so I just started looking at it like hold on, why am I spending time with people who don't give a fuck about me? People that don't love me? I'm not saying like homosexual love, but just friendship acceptance and support. It became very clear that I shouldn't spend time with people like that. Also it told me that when I'm taking drugs like alcohol, cigarettes, caffeine, porn, masturbation and weed I'm running from reality. But there's nowhere to run lol. So I should just chill out and be with it. Edit:.. Also I made a joke I thought was genius. What sexuality is a spliff ( joint )? Bisexual because it's 50 percent fa* ( tobbacco )

the rewards for opening one's heart are absolutely magical and magnifcent,pure magic, pure bliss I understand your beliefs, whichever road you take is the right one, love and support for you my friend I will share this experience I had today, love filled the space, making the sky a hundred times higher I saw human faces as big as a house, space expands and fills in, my body huge,everyone's body huge in this sea of space, my fellow ''humans' are giants the bliss and the magic of looking at someone's gigantic face, incredible, the sounds so vivid cars, cars look like advanced alien spacecraft with living light, so cool I havent taken psychedelics in months, love alters the physical space, realms beyond our imagination can be reached while we are all in harmony love isnt only simple lovey dovey stuff, it can be fucking amazing,like a rockstar, completely badass shit from higher dimensions love yourself and love others,in any way you imagine love to be, that is my recommendation

I have started my internship. I will be looking at swarming in fish. The experiments have not yet started, but we are getting there! Gosh, I had no idea just getting the experiment set up would take so much time and effort. And each replicate(trial) will involve a lot of effort. One trial a week - that's all we can manage apparently. Kind of a shame I won't be able to do much in 2months. I have already spend 1.5 weeks doing nothing but waiting for stuff to come and setting the stage in the meantime. Not sure what else to write. Seems kinda pointless, the only person who can understand is the one I am now. Old thoughts going in circles, guided by new and old conditionings and symptoms. Like a tree, I record every scratch in my trunk. The rings are there, only a figment of what was. I am time itself. The world does not understand, does not need to. Understanding is a part of our biological mechanism - just like everything else it is a lie. The concept of truth is a lie! I am not lying. I am telling the truth. Believe me, won't you, Pramit? What is the value of anything, detached from its context? Like a maze, everything we do - its all definitions containing relationship to other things. Remove the floor, and you leave it naked. And this is where the existential dilemma comes from. The chair - a place to sit, becomes something alien, otherworldly, when you consider it without that function. Who made this instrument and for what? Think of the human - so strange, with two arms, two legs, the ability to make noises and sounds, ghastly teeth to tear and crush, who gives itself 'meaning', a capability to deceive itself if things get too weird. I am a human writing this - I can never see myself that way. Because to see myself in that way, I must first learn how to not see. Impossible. The whole thing is a paradox - a illogical part of our imagination. I am lost again. And perhaps that is the way it is meant to be. Its okay. I am whoever I need to be. I am the world. I am free in the truest sense of the world. The symbol of my freedom lies in the chains on my body. Writing this post reminds me of a alzheimers patient - he wakes up every day to write in his journal 'I am awake', 'now I am awake', 'now I am really awake', 'the other pages are false - today I am truly awake'. A classic case. This is the conditioning for our awakening. I am awake.

it has come to the point where the human body is born again everyday, the organic freshness, the blood vessels, the vitality visuals develop so fast throughout the day, I hear sounds up to a hundred times more vividly and louder,I feel other people's bodies, hair, movements, gestures, emotions faaar more vividly then I used to be able to feel those things for myself in the past the human body evolves, the face shape, the magic of the human expression, the godly skin I would say that for others to imagine enlightenment from my experience is the same as if you would make about 5 mushroom trips a day, and yet you are somewhat in human harmony with everyone thats how fast things som insighs come by the hundreds, I have long made of habit of ignoring insights, as every insight is primitive by the next hour there's no use keeping a thought record of the new human body or the way a new emotion feels when a hour later is has already evolved, the only thing to do thats of quality is to pay attention, all the time, always thoughts are now a way for me to slow down things when they are going to fast, when the energy overflows I can dump it through thought-forms which make the present moment less intense and gives me some breathing room sometimes it feels like I'm ending up in another planet, earth, but alien-like, fairy like, dream like, and I mourn the old earth,which I seem to move away from, perhaps some fear throughout the evolution of these senses and energy I pray for love, so that I may remember the one most important thing, is that I love people and I want to hurt no one, its so intense that I do not know what I will become and control becomes less and less possible when I turn around and see that my dad has a new human body, more advanced, more organic, I know I have to surrender to what is, expecting to know what will happen is impossible to me that is the death and life of enlightenment, an evolution so unimaginably significant and intense,every second of life literally the birth of a new world and the death of the old one, you the creator,the witness, the space, all to infinity

So what? Taking your words back does not negate that you said it in the first place. The point is, when one is following a spiritual teacher, and they clearly have narcissistic personality disorder, pathological lying and psychotic tendencies, by saying she is the reincarnation of Cleopatra, is half alien, had sex with corpses, lured many children to be murdered and so on, maybe one shouldn't give that a pass and maybe rethink following her. Just an opinion.

You've totally missed the point of self inquiry. The whole point of self inquiry is to keep you looking/observing until you break free from delusion. What you call 'me', 'reality' are layers of stories glued together. They can only sustain if they are unexamined/unobserved. The moment you look, shit start disappearing like empty air. Doesn't that ring some bell? maybe you and your whole life stories and constructs are just a house of cards. What is the purpose of Self-inquiry? Its to deconstruct yourself, your beliefs about being a human/alien/nothingness and your world. Observation is the only direct spiritual practice and self inquiry is just a technique to keep you oriented and focused. There are other techniques like spiritual autolysis, mindfulness with labeling, Guided Neti Neti, staying with the I AM etc which basically facilitates the same observation with slightly different spin. Until?? Until all that can be deconstructed is deconstructed. And what is left? That which is Real. The unreal never existed and the real can't be destroyed.

I love Bashar's accent haha... Imagine translating an alien language (or no language) into english.

@Arman Regardless if its coming from alien or human the message is PURE and scientifically proven that everything in existence is energy vibrating at a certain frequency that when we change the nature/frequency the vibration(signal) changes thus you hear/see different tune/reality. Its really that simple. He is simply explaining truth in how it all works, your conditioning that an "Alien" is talking is limiting your ability to see the message clearly. Remove that and its very clear.

Thought = language = meaning = reason = word = logos We don't need thought or language for physical survival, we can survive greatly without ever thinking or knowing any languages. We don't really need thought or language for communication (just like animals can communicate without language and thought) So what is thought/language is really a mystery I don't think it has purpose in life of material world because all that exists for humans in material world only exists for self-survival purposes, I think its purpose is for human-being to know how to move beyond this world because frankly this world does not need thought at all. Thought is rather alien to this world. According to theological interpretations, human-beings v1.0 were living in infantile unconscious blissful state on Earth, and communicated by telepathy (also without thoughts), sounds, nonverbal signs, so communication was totally situational and not language-based. There was no language and no thoughts. And once upon a time there was creation of Adam (human-being v2.0) and Adam differed because he had language/thought and he spread it across unconscious blissful humans. Once humans received language their lives turned into suffering, they started to feel cold, hot etc. Theology says that language/thought is instrument of thinking (and not of communication), which was given to Adam by God so humans can use language to live accordingly to God's providential plan/idea (Logos). However, throughout time language became used for communication and the whole point of language is lost because thinking is opposite of communication. Internal dialogue within one's mind is still a communication and not thinking. Actual thinking occurs without dialogue as far as I understand. Also in theology, in apocalypse day human-beings will forget language and will forget that they ever knew any language, so world will be perceived as totally chaotic field of undefinable objects and this will induce sense of horror. I actually had this experience once, having deconstruction session I realised that language is not real, and after a while of this realisation I couldn't speak and think, I was speechless and had sense of horror and shock for several hours, I looked at my room and it was not a room anymore but bunch of meaningless objects, I looked at my hand and it was not a hand but something which I had no idea and no thought of what it is. U can't think without language. I had cold shower and hot shower but experienced no difference between them, discomfort couldn't enter mind and stayed somewhere in the body. Therefore, the actual matrix is not an ego, not rules, not sense of lack, but language. Others are secondary. In the movie the Matrix, this was greatly articulated - bunch of numbers and letters symbolised matrix. So language is the matrix, when person is an infant baby he receives the matrix with his mother's speech. If baby does not hear language he is out of matrix. Once he is absorbed by language completely, he is stuck in the matrix, once he is stuck - language is eating his inner time, matrix steals your time coz without thought/language there is no psychological time. Therefore, thought/language has created matrix, hence sufferings, but also thought/language is instrument of breaking out of the physical world into divine world according to God's providential logos. So matrix = culture = inevitable drawback of leading unconscious nature into consciousness. I've noticed that these days many lil kids are very late in learning how to speak comparing to previous generations, today many can't speak even being 6 years old. I guess it means that humans become more resistant to matrix/culture, in other words they have more time to develop some consciousness before they are enslaved. I guess it is the sign of progress coz it will be easier for them to break through the matrix.

Man, pre-internet living was wild. All the spiritual information you had was from your church, the books stocked in the library and 42 minutes of what an alien told you.

It feels like I'm exploring a new world it feels like I'm in a sci-fi movie feels like I'm in my favourite anime feels like I'm in heaven feels like I'm in a big sea, feels like I'm exploring galaxies feels like exploring an alien world, and I love my fellow aliens

I never forget my first 7-8 day water fast. It was like 24/7 meditation. I felt so pure and at ease like i am at one with divine flow. Personally i still believe fasting is the quickest and most genuine way to connect to the divine and awaken to your true self especially when done with the right intent and purified belief systems. I will do it again then do another week or so with urine looping straight after or whatever feels right at that stage. Hopefully i get some alone time soon so i can turn full alien Can't do it around people, they will freak out.

Society today is anything but natural, so some different methods to counteract the higher amount of toxins getting in our body can be really helpful Plus 2 months in and it tastes divine, it feels like an elixir is entering my body, boosting my energy levels the second I drink it! (I can see you all cringing). If it rolls with your heart then give it a go, if not, there are many other ways to detoxify, although this is the most powerful I believe. I'm just so grateful more people are aware of these practices. @H1H4H3 You are putting your open-mindedness into practice; that's great man. I wondered the same thing about the theories which did seem to reduce the credibility of longtime urine drinkers, however, I myself left it in the category of "It may or may not be true" and put all of my attention into the practice to physically experience the benefits. This is similar to not meditating after hearing that the person who taught you believes in alien races, when we know on so many levels that meditation has many positive side effects. The proof is in the pudding <3

Okay so I've been meditating for a couple years but I didn't really know what I was doing until a couple weeks ago. And WOWWWW. Seriously how do most people not know about this? My first glimpse of enlightenment was about a month ago and I was doing neti neti whilst high on weed and man that was some crazy shit. It felt really alien. I suddenly realised that there is no experiencer and all there is and ever was is experience. And yeah this felt really really alien. I felt like I just discovered orgasms for the first time hahaha. And now when I meditate I gradually gain more minfulness and thoughts start to fade into noise and everything becomes 'noise' ( neutral and there isn't anything that is more significant than any other thing ) and once that happens I feel like a key has just been taken out of the lock. And I'm not attached to my thoughts, I'm not convinced that I am my thoughts, or my sight or my senstations anymore and not in that problem solving mode. It's fucking beautiful and so alien at the same time. I often feel a wave of energy run through me as this happens like a vibration. that just coarses through me and I'm suddenly non attached to anything. Then this fades and I'm attached to thoughts again. And then I notice I'm talking to myself in my head about how enlightened I am lmao. And then I realise this is ego. And I'm back in square one. And I cannot go more than 20 minutes without an uncontrollable urge to move and open my eyes. Also when I opened my eyes after my most recent meditation everything was as if I have never seen it before, like I had new eyes or I was just born. and it gradually fades into my regular everyday state. I also experience mild closed eye visuals whilst this is happening and a ringing in my ears. But for the most part it feels like I've fallen out of my thoughts. Anyone else experience anythign similar? Was that falling out of thoughts the void? And if so how can I make it last and not attach myself to the ego? EDIT: Also I'm noticing how because I'm not in that state anymore I cannot really grasp what that's like. Is this falling out of thoughts thing of any significance? Am I going crazy? Is this just the ego playing tricks and deluding itself into believing it's enlightened? EDIT: I also feel weird presences or like someone is watching me whilst meditating but that fades too as i focus on my breath. I also see different colours as this state comes on and it looks a lot like the northern lights. EDIT: I know this is the third edit lmao but I'm also noticing how whenever this state comes on it's like my mind doesnt want me to see it. it diverts my attention. This is some freaky shit maaaan And I get it now how when leo said its like a scratch on the top of your head turns into finding a zip then slowly unzipping yourself from yourself. EDIT: I don't know if this is psychosis coming on or if it was enlightenment. It feels pretty good. EDIT: My hands feel like just hands and not like i own them ownership is a delusion. What the fuck is happening? Am I delusional and just imagining I'm enlightened? if anyone knows then pls tell me what is happening. Should I ask a psychiatrist if I'm sane? EDIT: So my regular state where im attached to thoughts is literally insane because everything is fundamentally neutral and just noise and believing that it's something more is craziness. And that means everyone else is insane too. But I know what sane is now. what the fuck EDIT: How do I know this is not my mind playing tricks on me making me believe I've experienced enlightenment? When really I'm just imagining it EDIT: I feel pretty regular now and I cannot really understand it unless im in that state. I cannot unsee this though :DD i feel exactly the same as before I meditated today but really really aware EDIT: I have no idea what the fuck i was talking about anymore lmao wtf EDIT: Now I see that attachments are like lenses on the truth ( pure conciousness or neutrality as i said ) But I'm not in that state anymore I just get it EDIT: Okay so it's the next day and I feel basically the same as before. I think that I try to rationalise what is happening and I begin to believe that my rationalisations are enlightenment. I don't look at it as crazy anymore. more like really sane.

Hello guys! I'm very confused by this topic. Short description: I'm a scientist (used to be 100% rational), got into psychedelics (mostly LSD) and meditation (quite intense, since 1 1/2 years now). I'm quite commited to radical open-mindedness and already had some intense healing experiences on LSD, so I build up some faith into my bodies healing abilities (starting from zero, really). I tried the urine drinking this morning and I felt more energetic, less hungry, etc etc, so I guess I'm gonna give it a try and see how it develops (other than that my diet is mostly plant-based vegan nowadays). I watched the videos posted in this thread and what troubles me most is that the people who make these videos admit quite openly to well-known conspiracy theories such as Chemtrails, UN-Depopulation programs, Alien invasions in our bodies, the Flat Earth Theory. So my question for you guys is .. do you believe in these conspiracy theories as well? As far as I'm concerned, I like the first-hand-experience approach: if I drink urine and I feel better - great! But how can I really check such theories? I mean, quite frankly, the 'evidence' people present for the Flat Earth thing makes me think they're just plain retarded.

for me it felt like I had this volcanic activity inside me, like I was charged with this volatile raging energy, my heart chakra erupting painfully, I felt like an alien predator, the energy was just pure alien wildness

Yes, on my first awakening. But after some years of experience i came to understand that those "Aliens" are just natural entities/energies/the universe itself, pictured in the context of the mind. So, we who used to like sci-fi movies or data, maybe we tended to see reality on the first awakening as aliens. Because for the mind, everything is alien at the end of the day so to speak.

the activation of magic, the unity, the connection with life, the divinity,the fading away of human death, while dying and coming into life daily just as our cells do,the fading away of time, the ocean of space and now specifically for me enlightenment is comparable to a constant trip of lsd that has qualities of soberness that's what I would describe my life as, everyday is the rediscovering of the human species, the rediscovering of the architecture of a city I've lived in my whole life not one tree, rock or image stays the same for more then one minute, whether its time, space, light, touch the building blocks of reality are in an infinite evolution there is no exclusion of anyone in this enlightenment, everyone shares the same time as me even though a day is 10 times as longer then a year ago, otherwise I wouldnt be able to communicate with anyone everyone shares the same space that is now miles vaster, everyone shares the new human bodies that if I had seen them a year ago Id thought they were alien bodies everyone shares the same voices and scents that are so much more vivid, so much more magical enlightenment cannot be contained into yourself, for it is the entirety of the world, of reality that enlightens @Pluto the fact that everyone can interact with me, even though im living life in an entirely different dimension of time and space, literally, is how I know that everyone understands,its not a matter of opinion,of a mental concept when you'll be so far across realities into the ocean of the present moment, an unimaginable life, almost extra-terrestrial, and everyone is somehow in complete harmony with you like always before, its a hard truth that others are enlightened as you enlighten you will gain insights that defy the very definition of what a human being is, eradicating those people you thought were real, they were merely your ego resting in the understanding of what others are, revealing underneath, the enlightened being in everyone only enlightened being can see enlightened being if you see an ego in someone, you are ego you see your own ego,people are mirrors there is no ego in anyone I see and when I do I know it is my ego what the monkey does, he sees

5-Meo-DMT This morning I plugged 27 μg of 5-MeO-DMT HCl. The first thing that needs to be said is, that this being my first experience of plugging, it was pretty disturbing. Sticking an alien object up my asshole was not a thing I though I would be doing willingly in my life. That being said, plugging seems like a very good method. I have had 5-MeO 3x before, always snorting. Snorting was just terrible. Nose hurting, I never managed to get it all in and always some of it dripped down my neck. Made me extra sick. My experiences with 5-MeO have been quite disappointing. Mostly I get sick. I get really sick in my body. I learned to stick my fingers really deep down my throat and get the puking reflex going. At the moment of the sickness this seems like the most liberating thing ever. After the sickness a lot of energy movement comes. This time the sickness was not so bad, but still I used the hand-to-throat method and was relieved quite a bit. It felt as if my whole body started opening and letting go. I felt like puking, shiting, respirating and making noises at the same time. A moment later everything settled and I fell into deep relaxation. A lot of energy was moving in my body. Mostly my back and my arms and legs. Weird most of the energy purging I get usually is in my trunk... I lay down and let it do its work. My arms and legs went completely numb. I wasn't sure if I will ever be able to move them again. I could in the end A simple insight I had during this trip was, that I actually never get out of my mind. Is that really so? Well? 27 μg and that is it? 30 μg is the big number a lot of people experience breakthrough on and I felt like a was a loooong way away still.