moon777light

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  1. thanks everyone for the suggestions
  2. feeling very shitty after our loss in the world cup against france. Then i tried to do what new eearth suggested, i asked myself "is the world cup part of who i am?" "is the Croatian soccer team part of who i am?" "will i become less when i let go of the concept of the world cup?" "has who i am become diminished by the loss?" ....and i keep saying yes to all these questions. i know soccer isnt that important (not important AT ALL) but i feel a hole in my heart for our boys
  3. READY PLAYER ONE? @sarapr @Emne @Colin thanks, its nice to hear from you guys again So now its offcially summer break for me so I can focus on reading some books to improve myself. I decided to start out with A New Earth by Eckarht Tolle. Here I will copy and paste insights I wrote from my OneNote consciousness journal: -skipped chapter 1 since it seems rather intuitive- Chapter 2 Insights: EGO THE CURRENT STATE OF HUMANITY EGO: an illusionary sense of identity, "I" is the ultimate primordial error. The very structure of the egoic mind is defined as the unconscious compulsion to enchance one's identity through association with an object!! Identification= Latin word Idem--> same, Latin word Facere--> to make. Identification /identify--> to make the same!!! As children we identify with our toys. Notice how the value of the toy does not matter. It can be as simple as a doll made from straw or a super expensive gadget. If we lose either, we feel the SAME sense of loss, anger, sadness. This later translates into identification with our property, cars, clothes, belongings, our career, etc. NEVER-ending process-> like trying to fill a glass that has holes in the bottom. We identify with things because they SELF-ENHANCE US. We obssess over these things because they will complete the picture we made up for ourselves, our "character". Without these things, our "character" will not be want we want it to be which leads to suffering. This is an endless process of suffering since we put the key to our happiness in OBJECTS. These objects can disappear in a second in any given moment, and will make us feel like we lost ourselves, even though we are still here. (think of all time lost fantasizing of these objects that give a false identity) This way of thinking creates the consumerism society we live in today and mimics the same pattern as cancer-> cells seek to multiply themselves, just like we seek all these objects to multiply our identity with. The egoic mind is completley conditioned by the past. EXERCISES IN THIS CHAPTER: INVESTIGATE your relationship with the world of things through self observation and things that you identify with "my" My identification with objects really skyrocketing since I was little girl, the moment I was allowed to watch tv channels like cartoon network and nickelodean or the Saturday 7am cartoons on the news channel where each show would be interrupted with brief commercials showcasing all the hot shiny new toys and all the cool girls with their fancy outfits and hair clips and awesome pink room playing with the dolls. This was the era that I started the "omg I want that and I will only think about that non stop until I get it" mentality. Really to this day I still have this way of thinking except, just like Mr. Tolle mentioned above, it has translated onto different items. Now I want all the nice makeup, skincare, latest phone, laptop, clothes, etc. It really has gotten so bad that if I am not studying for school, I am then obsessing over these things. Sometimes its not an object but rather an "idea" of myself. Having perfect skin, confident walk, perfect hair, blah blah. My young mind back then could handle the mental masturbation then but now as I grow older I can't.stop. If im thinking about lets say skincare that I want to purchase soon, I wont be able to do anything until I finish this conversation in my mind about all the things ill get. Its gotten so bad that even when I lay down in bed to sleep, I cant sleep until I finished the conversation. As for items I identify with: -My macbook (HUGE IDENTIFICATION), gives me a sense of superiority and "smartness" and gives me my sense of american persona amongst my european friends. I feel very fancy with it, and once I thought someone stole it (but I actually left it in my house) and I started crying Hysterically and felt as if there was a hole in my heart. Very indentified with this as "mine" -My clothes, gives me a sense that I have very good fashion style, so I am in that way "cool"er than the other ppl and again feeds my american persona I give to myself and makes me stand out in front of my european friends. (who probably don’t give a fuck lmao) -my apartment -my cute stationary -my cellphone -the background to me cellphone and and laptop -my name -the list goes on and on you get the idea Qoute from the book: "how do you let go of attachment? Don’t even try, its impossible. Attachment to things drops away by itself when you no longer seek to find yourself in them. In the meantime just be aware of your attachments. Sometimes you may not know that you are attached until you lose it or there is the threat of loss. If you are aware that you are identified with a thing, the identification is no longer total. I am the awareness that is aware that there is an attachment. That’s the beginning of the transformation of consciousness" My meditation and kriya yoga is still on hold but plan to start in a week again.
  4. very well said!
  5. i keep on misreading this as playing pokemon professionally
  6. @Equanimitize no, i wasnt reffering to you, i didnt watch your videos yet, i was referring to the ones people posted in the first few pages. Especially that weird bio-shock antagonist looking political polish dude haha if hes stage yellow then im the president of russia i was debating whether i should post teal swan on here but i think shes more stage green, although she shows slight signs of yellow
  7. so many of these examples aren't anywhere near yellow tsk tsk
  8. im back, whores
  9. you might as well make this meaningless life fun
  10. @Arman i completely agree with you. i think a reason why me (and practically everyone on here) quite like Leo's approach to explaining this is because he does it in a non-bullshit, straight to the point, open to skeptism way. I noticed Faceless's way of explaining the concept of nonduality is through the use of something similar to riddles. However i dont think his points are wrong or anything, just that sometimes ( a lot of the times) when i dont understand, i feel like im dumb or inadequate to understand this lesson thats being presented to me. Sometimes i get frustrated when i ask him to elaborate but he doesnt answer the question directly, instead answers by the use of other riddles. Then again there is a great deal of myself projecting onto faceless's answers (my insecurity leading me to believe that im dumb since i dont understand or my somewhat lacking of self-worth jumping to conclusions that he is speaking is a condescending-im-more-spiritual-than-you kinda way). We are all here to learn. Peace Also just wondering @Mikael89 @Faceless @Outer @Anna1 have any of you actually experienced no-self, or "enlightenment". Not talking about the philosophical questioning that all is one, but actually feeling it, the infinite?
  11. too much mental masturbation & philosophizing on this thread.
  12. practice present-moment awareness. Then you will understand.
  13. this makes me very happy <3
  14. @zoey101 @Applejuice @Empty @Leo Gura WE CAN'T WAIT!!!!
  15. @zoey101 i think he just saw that he was online