graded24

Calm down. You don't know anything about where I am coming from or my critical thinking skills. It's a wild guess I am making. That's all. It doesn't matter.

It's most apparent in his solipsism video. Deeper than Buddha, Ramana or Jesus for sure. Hey Leo, if you're reading this, could you post a video on confusion caused by the "multiple gods" conflicting with absolute solipsism? Thanks Edit: some clarification. It's clear that Leo is implying that this waking world might as well be multiple godheads creating a shared world, which, in essence, undoes everything he did in the solipsism video. I understand the metaphysical subtlety involved but at the end the implication is that the other "avatars" could be having their own experiences even if that's outside of my solipsistic bubble.

Yes I think the words are self explanatory. Inquiry can refer to inquiry into any part or aspect of experience. For example I definitely the first year or so inquiry the world in my direct experience. It was not self inquiry. Self inquiry is a very specific inquiry; it's the inquiry into 'I', or the inquirer itself. In that way it is a meta inquiry. It is easier said than done and leads to a lot of confusion. So it is often useful to have a guide to who you can specific questions.

Around Nov/Dec last year, I had read, watched (including Leo's excellent videos, which have impacted my metaphysics deeply) and contemplated Nonduality long enough for it to start breaking down old structures apart. There was an earth shattering realization about my work in science: science isn't probably going to answer the questions I wanted answered. To make matter worse, something inside me had realized this well in advance and I found that I had hit a huge wall of procrastination (though I didn't understand it at the time). My work life was suffering and at the same time, though I had zeroed in on self-inquiry in my Nondual exploration, I had no idea how to actually do it. There were multiple points of confusion: 1) How to exactly self inquire? 2) How to integrate it with the rest of my life 3) What is the guiding principle to orient my actions in the relative world, and what relation it has to Nonduality? Around that time, I came across this megathread started by Akilesh/@winterknight: I was quite impressed with his answers and, like many of you, I had a sense that they were coming from an authentic place. I started talking to him one on one and finally I opted for weekly phone conversations for a guidance fee. I also read his book, How to find what isnt lost, in the process. As our personal interaction started, things started to unravel and settle down in coming weeks and months. First and foremost, he helped my understand my own procrastination. He guided me through multiple 'hitting the wall' moments of self-inquiry, resolved many existential doubts, and helped me avoid many of the subtle traps of a spiritual path. He explained my many doubts about Advaitan metaphysics and how exactly it related to self-inquiry. I finally reached a point where things were integrated enough for life and self-inquiry to be self-sustainable. There is a harmonious life now, well integrated with a background spiritual inquiry, that comes to foreground multiple times on a given day. There is content and peace and, equally importantly, a healthy engagement with the relative world. I can honestly say that this transition wouldn't have been possible, or at least would have taken much longer, it it weren't for Akilesh's personalized help. My orientation to nonduality is Truth, so I really appreciated that he did not sugarcoat his statements. He was brutally honest at times, and he did what many teachers don't do: accepted at points that enlightenment doesn't mean you know answer to every question. In fact there are many important questions on which there are speculations, but no definite answer. No one knows. This really helped my mind settle down into unknowingness. How to find what isn't lost was an excellent concise instructional book on modern perspective on Advaita and, more importantly, how to actually practice self inquiry. Most books on self inquiry are those claiming to be by Ramana Maharshi; but they are actually not written by him. It's always compiled and translated by someone else and is in Q&A format, and it is very hard to extract the exact instructions of the practice, especially for a beginner. So if you are interested in self-inquiry, you must give it a try. I am writing it here so in case you relate to the place I was at, you can give what worked for me a try as well.

@winterknight What is the difference between mental objects and physical objects? Most people have an intuition that you can f*k around with stuff in the mental space, but as soon as it has an effect on things out in the 'actual physical world' , the shit just got real! There is a feeling that mental space fluctuates more, is reversible, private and mostly benign. The physical world on the other hand is irreversible. Once something happens there, there is no going back. But on the other hand I can also see that there are no clear lines between where the mental space ends and physical world begins. Can you speak to this distinction and what to make of it?

I see. I can relate. I didn't 'see' it though probably it was right in front in the first two years of exploring nonduality.. I just wasn't ready for it. I can see that I am identified with the seeker/nondual-student-me. It is more subtle than feeling being behind the eyes. I dont know exactly how to 'locate' it and disidentify from it..

Got it. Thanks. Self-inquiry seems to be such a direct, no BS, path toward enlightenment. Why isn't it more popular? Why shave the head, wear a robe? Why worship a guru with exotic retreats to India? Why all this embellishment around nonduality? It only keeps the people distracted. Why do you think it is not that well known?

Hmm.. I dont know. Can there be a problem without someone who has the problem? Sorry I am not playing word games with you. Just trying to understand the experience

Your answers often suggest that any negative emotion always arises TO some false sense of I. Can it be that there is irritation but no one who is irritated? After all I do experience it with perception. There is seeing but no one who is seeing.

@winterknight And when I do try to do it on the side.. it becomes like trying to attend to two things at the same time.. like working with a distraction As a result, the mind grows restless and a feeling of irritation arises.. not of peace.

@winterknight When I try to self-inquire WHILE doing intellectual work.. more often than not, I get involved in the work and forget the inquiry altogether.. until I remember it back again after a while. I am not sure in this period of forgetting whether or not there is an I because my attention is simply not there.. I am thinking the work-thoughts. Should i put efforts to keep inquiring on the side and not enter this forgetting-inquiry state? Or only inquire when the question arise?

@winterknight From Nondual perspective, there are no separate people really. The people are a collection of forms (thoughts, body etc) which are experienced by the Self. What does compassion mean then? When I am talking to someone, am I just talking to a thought? Why should I care about a thought then?

Thanks. Thats make sense. What is the state of 'flow' in relation to all this? When i play a computer game and am totally engrossed in it.. i only have thoughts relating to the game. I seem to totally forget not only the surrounding but also the 'me' . I am not sure what the i-thought is in that situation. It seems like there is no I-thought there. BUt then how is it different from the no-self we are trying to get at in spirituality? ( I am making things simplistic, but you know what i am asking about ..) Sometimes i feel good after such a flow state (like with work) but sometimes i also feel worse afterward (like with computer games). So I dont how they fit in with the picture.

Beware of anyone who talks of science +spirituality =magic. In my experience, they usually don't genuinely understand either science or spirituality.