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Pouya

Why do I run away from inquiring and sitting down?

51 posts in this topic

52 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

Fear.

 

This.


"I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become." - Carl Gustav Jung

"Open your heart, let the universe shine through, don't be scared, it knows what you need, now and forever"

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@Psyche_92 @Etherial Cat  Fear of myself? fear of sitting down and doing nothing? why would I be afraid of doing nothing and just inquiring?

 

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@Pouya Most likely you can't sit because your ego got you into enlightenment for all the wrong reasons in the first place. It discovered something new called enlightenment and thought to itself "That sounds like something cool. I don't have enlightenment so I need to have some of that or else I'm missing out." Then you had one profound experience which pleased the ego enough so it doesn't want to do it anymore. It would rather be doing something else to hold it's intrest. You gotta get that under control or else you'll spend the rest of your life chasing after one thing to another for what the ego desires.

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@cetus56 I've never thought of this. This can be actually true.

The experience was very satisfying and maybe I won't want anymore.

Honestly, my reasons were not about curiosity, I wanted lasting peace and happiness.

 

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Posted (edited)

25 minutes ago, Pouya said:

@Psyche_92 @Etherial Cat  Fear of myself? fear of sitting down and doing nothing? why would I be afraid of doing nothing and just inquiring?

 

Fear of everything your ego fears.

Someone who is enlightened has accepted what seemed unacceptable to his ego. It's a total transcendence and surrender to what is, without any complain.

Your ego won't allow you to contemplate and realize what you truly are.  It would be the death of it.

Despite that, your ego is not an enemy, though. It is a scared child, looking for comfort and distraction not to face his burning pain.

Edited by Etherial Cat

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. 

Rumi

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2 hours ago, Pouya said:

@cetus56 I've never thought of this. This can be actually true.

The experience was very satisfying and maybe I won't want anymore.

Honestly, my reasons were not about curiosity, I wanted lasting peace and happiness.

 

@Pouya Contentment is what you get. Acceptance of what is exactly as it is. But that only comes when the ego is silent. When it stops preferring to have that over this. As is with the case of you watching the clock and spending the time thinking of all the other things you could be doing instead of practice (what is). You say you want lasting peace and happiness but remember this, it is not the world that changes but your view of it.

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59 minutes ago, Serotoninluv said:

I’ve found self inquiry to be a relatively advanced practice that needs a baseline level of mind relaxation. It’s just not effective with a busy mind.

I would work on establishing a consistent basic meditation practice. Once the mind can consistently settle down, then add in self inquiry.

^ This ^  9_9

I think you should start with a regular meditation habit. Once your mind starts to exhaust itself with other ideas and thoughts, it might naturally start the self-inquiry process. Don't force yourself to do it right now, that is what causing the ego-backlash.

Start with meditation and it will gradually turn into self-inquiry. I do one-hour meditation/self-inquiry, it goes kinda like this:
random thought, random thought, self-inquiry insight, random thought, random thought ... 

Probably 90% meditation and 10% self-inquiry, but even only that 10% gives you powerful insights.


"Happiness is the absence of the striving for happiness" - Chuang-Tzu

 

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16 minutes ago, Pouya said:

Fear of myself? fear of sitting down and doing nothing? why would I be afraid of doing nothing and just inquiring?

Because that's when all the shit can rise up that you have repressed.


"I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become." - Carl Gustav Jung

"Open your heart, let the universe shine through, don't be scared, it knows what you need, now and forever"

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1 hour ago, Serotoninluv said:

I’ve found self inquiry to be a relatively advanced practice that needs a baseline level of mind relaxation. It’s just not effective with a busy mind.

I would work on establishing a consistent basic meditation practice. Once the mind can consistently settle down, then add in self inquiry.

1 minute ago, Arthur said:

^ This ^  9_9

I think you should start with a regular meditation habit. Once your mind starts to exhaust itself with other ideas and thoughts, it might naturally start the self-inquiry process. Don't force yourself to do it right now, that is what causing the ego-backlash.

Start with meditation and it will gradually turn into self-inquiry. I do one-hour meditation/self-inquiry, it goes kinda like this:
random thought, random thought, self-inquiry insight, random thought, random thought ... 

Probably 90% meditation and 10% self-inquiry, but even only that 10% gives you powerful insights.

Great advices from both Serotoninluv and Arthur. 

If you are young and aren't overwhelmed with an ocean of suffering, take your time.  Grow in other way with other practices.

 


Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. 

Rumi

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4 minutes ago, Psyche_92 said:

Because that's when all the shit can rise up that you have repressed.

On point. 

I'm dealing with that at the moment. Its hell of painful O.o.  

 


Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. 

Rumi

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5 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

On point. 

I'm dealing with that at the moment. Its hell of painful O.o.  

 

Sure thing. It's the same for me at the moment. The thing is though, if you sit through some of those episodes, you become more confident and less fearful about facing another one.


"I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become." - Carl Gustav Jung

"Open your heart, let the universe shine through, don't be scared, it knows what you need, now and forever"

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5 minutes ago, Psyche_92 said:

Sure thing. It's the same for me at the moment. The thing is though, if you sit through some of those episodes, you become more confident and less fearful about facing another one.

Exactly :) It's well worth

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10 minutes ago, Psyche_92 said:

Sure thing. It's the same for me at the moment. The thing is though, if you sit through some of those episodes, you become more confident and less fearful about facing another one.

 

4 minutes ago, peanutspathtotruth said:

Exactly :) It's well worth

 

Thanks. It is somewhat comforting to see things from this perspective. 


Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. 

Rumi

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@Pouya Because who willingly faces their own death? 


"The place you are looking for is the place from which you are looking." - Mooji 

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Just now, Shin said:

Because it will kill you 😏

That sure is going to help! :D

It will not kill you.

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Posted (edited)

12 minutes ago, Shin said:

Because it will kill you 😏

it will show YOU that you are the Author who, right up until this moment, had made the mistake of thinking he was the fictional character he gave life to himself.

yes... it will kill your idea of a real character which you think exists and replace it with it's truth - that it was always just a fictional character - KNOWN by YOU and also misidentified as yourself by YOU

Edited by SoonHei
clarity and format

"When you discover Stillness in the movement, and the Unchanging within the changing, then you have found your eternal home."

All perspectives are true, but there is only one -----> TRUTH

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@Pouya You may just not be at the right place in your life to have a serious inquiry habit. 

Many times I have tried to introduce new habits into my routine and I can't get them to stick because it just isn't the right time. 

Try building up to it, as others have said, you will most likely need to have a developed mind to the point where you can even sit for that long without losing focus. I find that starting small and building up over long periods of time is what is best to introduce a new habit


"The perfect man employs his mind as a mirror; it grasps nothing; it refuses nothing; it receives, but does not keep."  - Chuang-tzu

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