Etherial Cat

@Leo Gura God has your trust and your back, and that's a big one. And also, thanks for your answers. I appreciate it.

What would you accept to trust your husband with, and to what point ? Submissive sounds like going against one's will/decision process to me. If not, that's not being submissive but enjoying/being cool with the ride.

I'm genuinely curious about your perspective on this. If you were a woman considering marriage and raising children, what proportion of potential partners do you think you'd feel comfortable entrusting with the responsibility of providing for you and your children, particularly if that meant becoming financially dependent on them? I'm interested in how you'd approach that decision yourself.

@enchanted Shouldn't have snapped like that. Sorry. You just wanted to share and your comment wasn't even directed at me.

@Basman You're confusing feminism as a modern political movement with egalitarianism as a form of social organization. I never claimed hunter-gatherers were feminists. And the existence of gendered divisions of labor doesn't contradict relative egalitarianism. Nor is egalitarianism necessarily altruistic. Societies can develop mechanisms that limit domination because those arrangements serve their members' interests. As for slavery, you're actually illustrating my point. The fact that an institution was normalized for centuries doesn't make it an immutable feature of human nature. My argument is simply that social arrangements emerge under particular material and historical conditions, evolve, and can eventually disappear. You're arguing against a romanticized version of my position that I never expressed. @enchanted I've already watched numerous videos and read extensively about the historical origins of patriarchal societies. I've also attended university courses on the subject, including the history of law from archaic times to the present, studied patriarchal legal systems such as Roman law in depth, and examined their evolution into modern continental legal systems. I've also explored broader theoretical frameworks and meta-theories like Ken Wilber. I consider myself reasonably well-informed on the subject and don't particularly need to be lectured about it. But thank you, I am sure you only meant good.

Feminism emerged after humanity had gone through a long historical cycle of patriarchal social organization, stretching from the rise of agrarian societies to the Industrial Revolution. Earlier hunter-gatherer societies were often considerably more egalitarian, and some prehistoric cultures may even have worshipped a Great Goddess or other female deities. A lot of people look at how societies are organized through the narrow lens of the historical period we've only recently emerged from, mistaking it for some universal, timeless norm. But it was just one particular form of social organization, shaped by specific historical and material conditions, rather than an immutable feature of human nature.

Seems like progress is back on the timeline, and that progress changes gender roles as a matter of survival.

What bothers me most is that relationships are inherently uncertain. People evolve, feelings change, relationships transform, and circumstances shift. That's why I don't think anyone should make their long-term survival dependent on the stability of a romantic relationship. Financial dependence is a risk in itself, one that I'm personally unwilling to take. And I suspect very few people would willingly accept that degree of vulnerability outside the context of marriage or a romantic relationship. Once your financial survival depends on keeping a relationship intact, you may find yourself desperately trying to preserve something that no longer works, or tolerating situations you would otherwise find unacceptable simply because leaving isn't financially viable. Of course, marrying someone extremely wealthy who provides you with a house, a trust fund, or some other form of financial security could mitigate that risk. But even then, I think it's important to maintain the skills, resources, financial literacy, and ability to create value that allow you to navigate the world independently. People die, businesses fail, fortunes disappear, and circumstances change. As for motherhood, I actually love children, and I think contributing to creating and raising a family is an enormous privilege. I can easily imagine it being one of the most fulfilling things I could ever do. But children have two parents, and I think traditional gender roles have historically deprived men of opportunities to participate fully in raising their own children. That's a shame, because I believe both fathers and children benefit enormously from spending time together and developing a close relationship. And naturally, every hour the children spend with their father is also an hour during which their mother is free to pursue other interests, work on projects, or simply enjoy some time to herself. I personally have a strong need to create, learn, and work on projects, and I don't see why that should be incompatible with loving motherhood. There's also the fact that raising children is an evolving responsibility, not a permanent state of intensive caregiving. The early years are particularly demanding, but children gradually become more autonomous. Our role as parents evolves from providing constant care to offering guidance, support, and increasingly more freedom. And that's healthy for them, too. Children need to discover the world, develop their own identities, and become independent individuals rather than remain permanently under their mother's protective wing, however loving she may be. So I don't see motherhood as something that should require sacrificing the rest of my identity, my projects, or my financial independence. Nor do I think being a good mother means being the parent who does absolutely everything. If anything, I'd want my children to have two fully involved parents, each with a meaningful relationship with them, and each with a life and identity beyond parenthood. Ultimately, I'm not against a partner providing financial support, nor do I think every contribution to a family needs to be financially compensated. I simply don't want my ability to survive independently to depend on the continued goodwill, love, or financial stability of another person.

I didn't doubt it. I trust you on that one Yes, some men nowadays are very interested in bonding with their kids and want to be a bigger part of their life than just being the provider. It's healthy and is natural part of emotional availability. As for childbirth, I can't imagine it to be very pleasing, but the joy of holding the baby is a great reward. I am still as clueless as you are .

The game was created by Russians, so it uses kilograms, not pounds. And the character isn't an underage girl. The game is designed so that you gradually realize this particular husband is a real asshole and that you're trapped in a Groundhog Day-like situation, with no money and the same chores to do over and over again. I read it as a way of putting the player in the shoes of someone who slowly realizes they don't want to be there anymore, doing endless chores in a relationship they no longer want to be in, especially once they understand just how bad the situation actually is. This design speeds up the emotional process of really not wanting to be there anymore, and feeling trapped. That's much more common, unfortunately.

Environment and labour changes have occurred so much that the division of labor is in need for reorganization. Also, no way that I am not earning my own money and not doing stuff with my 2Blaws and my Mlaws. Plus I am ingenious and can create way too much value to stay at home. It would be a waste of resources. Plus, as I said earlier I don't like it.

I still do manage to cook wholesome, fresh food in very little time. As an exemple, yesterday I tossed vegetables in my air fryer after wrapping them in tin foil and it's ready in 15mn. Or If I want something fancier, I'll use the thermomix. I am a decent cook, and there was a time I enjoyed backing. But I currently have little time and energy for that due to focusing on my professional life. - One of my aunt maintain her house and cooks really good, but she has barely no money of her own and keeps going thanks to her benzo addiction. Behind the scene, her mariage is a catastrophy.

I never heard of that story before. Other times. Millennial men in my country tend to tell they don't want to reproduce the same experiences as their pops with their kids. More time spent with them is what they want. Which I find really good.

I think it makes sense for women to stay at home until the kids are all in school. I would want that. But once they reach that time, spending time with their father becomes really important too to develop more masculine principled skills. In my last relationship, I pictured myself dropping the kids in his office so they could learn from pops. Generally speaking, i also feel the need for creating projects, contribute to society and earning money for the family so I wouldn't want to go for being a full time stay at home mom.

Are your idea of an interesting side quest drinking booze, and spending time with one of these? Better stay home with some tea and some good book.