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Everything I've done has been a quest to feel good with the realization that feeling good is not what I think it will be. I continually trick myself into thinking about what feels good. "Watch your thoughts", Abraham Hick's "Pay attention to how you feel" are the same thing. I had a realization now how I go into stories to explain why I'm feeling good. A certain place or person, made me feel good, a memory, a story revolving around an "I". Inevitably there are consequences and backlash created in this. I can surrender, die to bliss not only when I feel bad and want out but also when I'm feeling amazing.

I am nor happy or sad, i am blissful, happiness/sadness, ups/downs, bliss transcends all, bliss is your natural, true state. It is eternal, it is pure, it is serene, it is beyond happiness and joys. You are Bliss, You are Love! ? ❤️

I haven't heard of Yuval Harari. Thanks for mentioning him. . . This wasn't quite the facet I was getting at, yet this is also a profound realization. It reminds me of Leo's "Hand Exercise". . . Here a person observes their hand without any thought. Just observation and feeling their hand. This is actual. Then the person puts their hand behind their back and imagines their hand. They create a thought construct of their hand. This is an imagination. It seems too simple and obvious, yet the direct experience can be profound to highlight the contrast between actual Now and imagined. One can extend this to looking at the wall (actual Now) and then thinking about their parents (imagined). . . One tendency of the mind is to conflate actual and imagined. When presented this a person might think "Duh, this is so obvious. I now the difference between actual and imagined". Yet we then live our lives misinterpreting imagined as real. It is also a good exercise for realizing Now. Not quite, it's even more radical than that. A priori and posteriori and great epistemological ideas about how we come to know truth. Yet my understanding is that it both refer to how a proposition is known to be true. That has great value and practical usage. Yet I'm pointing to something different. I think I added in too much to the example. To re-visit the example. . . How do you know it's now? Try to imagine prior to the idea of now, so all there is is Now. How do you know everything is happening? . . We could theorize about what is a happening, what is sensation and perception, neuroscience etc. That's all good. Yet there is also a "before" all that. Yet here, it's not like there is a me knowing everything. Before all the theory, there is nothing to know. There simply just IS. Think of a baby, they are just simply aware of what is. They have no theory about stuff. Kinda like that. . . So it's not like "me" knowing. It's more like ISness "Knows" itself. Now just Knows it's Now. .. . Another way of saying it is that awareness is aware of itself. All evidence and theory is second order. There is a first order of ISness before the theory, evidence etc. Creating a conceptual framework is helpful, yet one can only go so far with concepts. Ime, concepts can help support direct experience. A person may have a realization of direct experience, beyond words. "Oh, my god!! What just happened? I can't explain it". This can feel groundless and the tendency of the mind is to dismiss it as "woo woo" and return to status quo. Yet a conceptual framework may provide grounding for integration. For example, after the direct experience one may realize "Oh my gosh!! That is what Rupert Spira was talking about!!! I get it. Yet I can't explain it". The point about A is B has to do with the dualistic conditioning of the mind. Anytime we say something is something else we are creating two things in a relative context. Re-vist all of your statements with the word "is". In each instance, you are creating one thing and equating it to another thing. For example you earlier wrote "the ego is a construction. .. ". In some contexts, content is important. Not here. The content isn't important, it's the structure. Notice the way it is structured. You have created two things. One thing you call an "ego" and another thing you call a "construction" and you propose that the ego (A) = construction (B). . . . The mind does this so much it becomes oblivious to what it's doing. This can be helpful to navigate life and survive. Yet the mind gets lulled into believing it's true. One exercise I've done is to walk through nature and notice every time I make statements. I then acknowledge I am creating relative meaning that is not objective/actual. . . That duck is big. No, that duck is a duck. Those clouds are beautiful. No, clouds are clouds. This is boring. No, a thought this is boring is a thought this is boring. That litter shouldn't be here. No, the thought that litter shouldn't be here is a thought that litter shouldn't be here. Adyashanti is the enlightened. No Adyashanti is Adyashanti. The thought Adyashanti is enlightened is the thought Adyashanti is enlightened. . . This exercise is maddening to the mind because it prevents being right, attachment and identification. The exercise still has labels, but its a big step. The next step would further remove labels. Rather than that duck is a duck. It becomes that IS is IS. How is this liberating? The liberation doesn't come from the theory, it comes from the embodiment. For example, suppose you tell me that this passage I wrote is delusional, I have no clue about enlightenment and I need to watch more Eckhart Tolle videos. How might my mind body respond? If there is attachment/identification that my writing is true/insightful and that you are wrong - the mind and body will likely respond defensively. It will want to defend that the writing is true/insightful. I may try and convince you that the writing is true/insightful. Yet what happens when there is embodiment of IS is IS? Then it becomes "writing is writing" and "a thought that writing is delusional is a thought that writing is delusional". There is nothing here to be attached to. There is nothing here to be identified with. It's the same as saying a bird chirp is a bird chirp. Yet it's not the theory. It's the underlying realization and embodiment. Is the mind just thinking this? Or has the mind-body actually embodied it. Is there still underlying feelings of attachment/identification and desire to convince myself and others that the writing is true/insightful? Or does it have not more significance than a bird chirp? What is the sensation of color? Colors don't exist. A tree is not green. The visual cortex is creating a hallucination of green and you have no idea if what I call green is the same thing as what you call green. What is pain? You can define it however you want. Pain to you could be pleasure to someone else. Try some S & M and explore the inter-connectedness between pain and pleasure to the point you can't tell the difference between pain and pleasure. All these concepts are great, yet they aren't actual. Creating a terms like "pain" and "pleasure" is useful to communicate, function in society and survive. Yet ideas of pain is not the actuality. It is not the direct experience. An exploration of pain through observation and direct experience is very different than a theoretical exploration of pain and pleasure. . . Similarly, explore terror and peace so deeply that you cannot distinguish between terror and peace in your direct experience. As well, explore real and imagined so deeply that you cannot tell the difference between real and imagined. Not theoretically. Literally in your direct experience. You are assuming there is a universal, objective thing called "pain". How can it be pain without your interpretation of it as pain? The conceptualizing has value, yet its so easy to get trapped in a vortex of intellect. It goes sooo much deeper. . . Self inquire "what is pain?". Don't think about it or try to figure it out. There is understanding of direct experience. Explore actual direct experience of pain. What are the inter-connections between sensation, thought, interpretation. Yet don't intellectualize. Just ask the question and observe. If you and a gf are into kinky sex, this is a great area to explore. I've been in realms in which I'm at an interface of pain, bliss and humor. My gf couldn't tell if I was screaming in pain or laughing hysterically. She would ask "Is this good or bad?". I'd respond "I don't know, but keep going. . . ". In general, a good way to blast through all this is with a psychedelic.

When you truly finish you will no longer search for more spiritually speaking. However, you may still search for more in your relative life, that would be normal if you currently have $500 and want to achieve financial freedom for example. Many people gloss up awakening and enlightenment and expect magical blissful states, be careful if you get caught up chasing states your whole life like a bliss junkie. After all, now is all there ever is, and now is now, this moment is all there is and all there ever will be.

@Alex bliss Keep at it then. You have a sense of what the right direction is. Try to minimize speculation. It slows your path.

What Sadhguru probably points to is you (Alex bliss) can become so conscious that you can realize that you are not your body (far beyond it)

Everything is consciousness. Everything includes body! So, of course consciousness can't leave body because body is consciousness. But Alex bliss may stop be conscious of the body by having anesthesia for example.

When I sit down to meditate, I feel heat in the right side of my chest. It scares me as I don't know whether it is safe to continue with the meditation, Tara Wells' book says "heat without bliss can be dangerous", but it doesn't say how. I get really scared, and then I get up and eat a whole bunch of weird food. I don't really know what to do. Perhaps I could start by deconstructing the beliefs that I have around it, and do more contemplation on the topic of Leo's survival video.

@Alex bliss That’s the realization of the actuality of love / being.

@Alex bliss You speak as though you understand you are unreal, but this is just an idea for you. It is not a direct realization, so you're still speaking from a position of delusion. In this work it does not matter what you believe or think. What matters is direct awareness of what is the case. All others, including yourself, are imaginary. You're not appreciating how radical this is. You're intellectualizing it and treating it as a cool idea. That is not nearly good enough.

@Alex bliss Pure empty awarness just thoughts.... Who you are is beyong descriptions Dont just ask questions like parrot turn your attention to unchanging sense of being, that witch knows all bur cant be knowm and contemplate dont answer if you answet it or thought comes just see that ot is appearning to something In something And that something is always Now that something is all and nothing You cant see it you are it!

@Alex bliss There is no I. You still aren't getting that.

@Alex bliss the realization that you are pure awareness will not be a thought or a concept. it will be known. like taste of something you eat is known. so yes, you start by asking the question and in the end see that you were never the one asking the question, but only mis-identified as the one who was asking the question

@Alex bliss yes. That was the first awakening i had. Extremely profound.

@Alex bliss your life is spiritual journey. Always was.

@Alex bliss If I am pure emptyness then why don't I feel other bodies. There is ONE BIG BODY (Pure Awareness) This ONE BIG BODY feels every other mini-body (Alex Bliss, SoonHei, Ivankiss...) Right now, a mini-body is asking why it cannot feel the rest of the mini-bodies... The mini-body can only be/feel itself. This is like if PURE AWARENESS was your entire body. and Your Hand was asking the question If I am the whole body, why can't I feel the rest of the body It is because the hand can only feel the hand. If you step on a nail, you will not feel the pain in the hand, it will be in the foot. the pure-awareness (YOU) in the entire body will feel the pain in the hand and in the feet. as well, the pain will be felt in the hand and in the feet. But hand will not share the pain of the feet. In short, the one asking your question is the HAND (Alex Bliss) and not the ENTIRE BODY (pure awareness) PURE AWARENESS is ALREADY feeling all other bodies. Just as your body is ARLEADY feeling all the parts of your body. Don't be a hand... realize you're (always & already) the ENTIRE BODY! then your question will also be gone

100 years is nothing compared to infinity/bliss that you will be with real death if there is no reincarnation which I believe there is not when you are fully awake and do not want to return here... Why do you want to die now and not wait it out to see how it plays out?

I am a porn addict, and also a Youtube addict. Below are my thoughts - 1-2 hours after I cut off all major distractions. ------------ " This is about cleaning myself off of the toxicity I've been indulging in. I feel content without achieving anything. Now that is something one wouldn't expect in theory. And this is just one- two hours into the commitment to clean myself off of toxicity. While on this path, I'm naturally drawn to meditation, or in other words, being grounded in the now. I'm making more observations. Looking at a second's clock for a minute. That's something. Wow. Higher consciousness itself is the bliss, you don't need anything else. Omg. Things are trippy when you start being aware. There's a lot more to the world than what you were previously aware of. How can I even suggest her to marry and find a guy, that won't solve anything for her. Trust yourself to do something which will reduce her suffering. Just a 4 minute song and it felt like eternity. This is the way to live if not anything. With awareness, knowing that you could be god, Immersing yourself into the experience. I'm just looking at how mechanical my hands look while typing, are they really mine? I mean, who am I really. Certainly, these hands don't look mine, and this concept of ownership seems strange to me. Again, who is this me? It is something that I used to refer to myself even if I am not that very thing the reference is supposed to point to." ------ Questions to those who are not stuck on low consciousness, 1. Is there a feeling of strangeness about familiar objects, a strangeness which accords a depth to them, which you probably didn't notice before? 2. Is the experience richer, not necessarily in terms of pleasure, but in the depth of the experience? 3. What do you personally think is something I am blind to (in context of what I described) ?

This form is temporary. There is pain, bliss and in between... I would like there to be more bliss for sure but at least we have psychedelics for a temporary amount of time while having this experience which brings bliss in our lives that you can continue doing even if enlightened. I am satisfied with the answer from the trips and I'm only doing more trips for the giggles.

Of course. What I'm talking about here is the symbiotic relationship between duality and non duality. Of course theory is limited, of course confusing theory with God causes suffering and you will hit a wall. But why did god allow that to happen? That's what I'm answering here. I'm not talking about HOW to get enlightened. I don't care about how to get enlightened in this post. I'm going meta or beyond the desire to enlighten. I'm talking about WHY the HOW exists. I'm talking about WHY god created theory, rather than not. What the function of theory is. I'm not talking about its limitations. I don't care about its limitations in this post. I'm talking about why its there. I'm not even talking about what it does, or what it can do. I'm talking about the 'structure' of structure itself. What I'm saying is the function/structure of theory is designed to divide you from God, so that you can experience God. Without theory, you cannot experience God. You can only Know god (and there is a massive difference between Knowing and Experiencing God). As a relative example: if you theorise about an airplane, then you can actualize that airplane and then EXPERIENCE flying. But if it was not possible to theorise about an airplane, you could not build an airplane and EXPERIENCE it. God <-> Theory is the exact same. To Experience a certain facet of God, you need to absorb some spiritual theory, then actualize that theory, then experience that theory (or realize god through that theory). There are many different facets of God: voidness, love, energy, passion, bliss, goodness. Why is that? Why are there so many different sides of the same coin? BECAUSE OF THE THEORY! THATS WHY THEORY IS IMPORTANT! You will experience god as love, if you have absorbed a lot of theory about how god is LOVE (say some christian beliefs). You will experience God as voidness, if you absorbed a lot of zen theory. etc etc etc. That's what I'm trying to say. And physical beings will keep producing theory for infinity, and facets of God will generate forever, enabling God to have infinite facets. This has ramifications for knowing WHAT you should create and WHAT life purpose you should have.

All your favorite childhood stories and dreams are real. You can be or do anything you want. You are never alone, angels, God, spirit guides, source, whatever you want to call it or form you imagine is takes is always there. You can tap into all the happy memories or future bliss anyone ever had or will have, now. Source/God/Oneness has infinitely different flavors and resonances as it comes through to us, it's not just like having one boring flavor of ice cream all the time. You imagine your reality so you have the power to guide and hold your focus toward the most beautiful visions and feelings you have, and in doing so guide the manifestations of reality towards that. A chipmunk in the woods eating a pine cone is as important an event as a meeting of the world's most powerful leaders. What do you have to add?

@Mikael89 Sure I have a sense of self and experience negative emotions. I agree with what she says in the video. I never said anything to argue against anything like that in this thread, I only pointed out some realizations I've had that are wonderful. If you want, you can focus on things that make you feel amazing. That's all I'm doing. Sometimes I don't feel like doing the things that make me feel amazing, like going out for a run when the temperature is below freezing, but I've learned what my mind says feels good and what actually in my experience feels good can be very different. I can be the witness of how I feel, and in the witnessing I change my feelings. That's what emotional mastery is, I suspect anyway. I wouldn't want to feel bliss all the time, because it would no longer be bliss. I enjoy the drama. I'm not liberated, so to be honest sometimes I do NOT enjoy the drama. But what I have realized is that I have incredible power to create, and what I choose to focus on is one with what I create.

I agree with you. We need substance to our lives, we need art, poetry, self expression, meanwhil higher state of consciousness is just a way to connect even more with the world, so it's also worth it to achieve it, it is not necessearly a loner track. I do understand that a higher state of consciousness is like "I don't need anything else in my life", but that would take a permament state of pure bliss and non attachment with the external world that for me is currently in my POV impossible to grasp. Just be your friend and understand your own limits, enlightenment is not a rat race

This is my solo retreat report. I hope it will inspire you to do something like this yourself. Over a month ago I started my 4 week solo retreat. I was quite ready for this. I rented a tiny cabin with no electricity, no water. Spartan conditions, but it was extremely cheap and all I could afford. It was not easy. I quickly found myself in an ocean of suffering and bliss. These two would swap back and forth, varying in intensity and duration. It didn't take me long to realize that the greater the challenge I faced, the more profound the insight at the end and the stronger the bliss following it. This kept me going through the hellish phases. Just a day or two in, I realized that no meditation technique would do. I was not in charge. All I could do was be quiet and watch as life expressed itself through me by spontaneously contemplating the right questions, than inspecting the body, then forgetting all and surrendering completely, then other activities still. I think it was day 3 when the kundalini stuff started to happen. Good thing I heard about all this many times. If I didn't, I'd probably go crazy. In my meditations unspeakable stuff was happening in my body, visions more real than reality would come to mind and I had problems discerning what was true and what was false. Many times my body got so blocked up I thought I would die, only to be forced into an even deeper surrender. Nights were no relief either. Lucid dreams full of trials and challenges awaited me. Alien abductions and meeting gurus, sages and stuff like that. In short, it was a hell of a ride. Fortunately, after about 3 days this subsided. Deep contemplations started to take place uncovering old traumas, unmet desires and such. It was beautiful. On day 14 I had the biggest insight of the retreat. I was contemplating Consciousness itself, when I realized that it is no different from Love. Than I remembered the Hindu concept of Sat-Chit-Ananda (Being-Consciusness-Love), looked closer, and sure enough, this Consciousness-Love was not different from Being either - meaning me. I bathed in this unbounded state for a couple of hours looking over a beautiful pond nearby. I came to the conclusion that I was done here, after 2 week out of 4. It has been 16 days since I came home now. A lot has changed, and nothing at all. I am clearer than ever about what I want, need and value. My life has a much deeper sense of purpose and authenticity. My contemplation skill just sky rocketed. I realized what contemplation is, and it is such a joy to do it even hours a day, as I now know that I can go all the way to the truth of anything I want to know. And since I believe, I make it happen. I have had issues with eating for a long time, even though my diet was good. A lot of shame and guilt always plagued this arena of my life. After a particularly bad meal on the retreat and a deep introspection afterwards, I asked desperately - "How the fuck do I solve this?". And the answer came - "Just ask.". I realized the ability to ask about any food and I will get an answer from inside - it tells me if I should or shouldn't eat. Quickly I realized this works for any question with yes and no. I can ask about anything and know if it is 'yes' or 'no', but it's not always easy to ask and follow the answer. This often takes balls and and losing a fat piece of ego is common here. Soooo... go do it. Spend time alone. Forget it all. Immerse yourself in yourself. You won't believe how much bullshit you are buying into. Thank you Leo, you were one of the ones who inspired me to do this!

I have taken the lessons, both the old ones, and I'm currently going through the newly redone ones, I'm about 2/3 done with the new ones. The new ones especially are very well done and I think any Kriyaban would benefit from them, even those like me that are not in the Yogananda/Sriyukteswar branch of the lineage. My teacher specifically told me that other than the altered Kriya techniques and some suspected exaggeration in Autobiography (some of the stories he tells in Autobiography are very different and more extreme than how they have been passed down in my branch), that all of the other content that SRF puts out is solid. I also think the new lessons are on discount for half price until the end of the year if I remember correctly. The general information on metaphysics and spiritual matters is wonderful, especially for a westerner, as there's not a lot of good info on this stuff in the west. Also Hong-Sau and AUM are good techniques. I still practice both on occasion, even though they are not in Lahiri's teachings. If my mind is feeling very energized and unsettled on a particular day I will practice Hong-Sau for a few minutes as a warmup to Kriya to center myself. And, if I have a really good Yoni Mundra, which is practiced at the end of my session, and I want to sit longer and absorb myself in the bliss, I will practice AUM for a few minutes while my hands are already up there. I can hear all the astral sounds except the rushing water of the 5th chakra easily without plugged ears, but if I want to absorb myself in the rushing water most of the time I need to plug my ears and formally practice AUM.