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It doesn't matter what I do, the same symbols of failure keep following me around; if I get a hold of one thing, I let something else slip. Like, no matter how hard I try to clean up around myself all the time something ALWAYS ends up out of order somehow... if everything visually is organized something somewhere around a corner has gone into disarray, almost like a demon follows me around and anything that isn't fresh enough in my mind to practically have a photographic memory of will be *deleted* or messed with in some way by the universe. Every time I get pulled over I have an expired insurance card to give the cop (even though I have a current one... somewhere). Like I swear to God, even though my one is current & I know where it is in my glove box, so mote it be I swear to CHRIST that by the next time I get pulled over, I will have been robbed or have freaked out in anger over losing *something else* in between now and then, and I swear to god in a few years when I get pulled over again I am going to pull out an expired insurance card from years ago and look like a dipshit in front of the cop... because that's just my curse. It's not just that though, if I work; I will forget something in front of someone and be embarrassed.... so I try to work as least as I can (not just because of that but whatever). So I try to play a video game for fun; but even still I fuck something up and get an earfull from a teammate, or insulted by a cocky enemy. I'm having a really hard time trying to convince myself not to commit suicide. Two days ago I left the dentist w/ a prescription for antibiotics for a root canal, I fold it and put it in my jacket pocket. I tell myself "it's in this pocket, just don't touch anything until you get it filled" well I go pick up my girlfriend and do a bunch of running around and end up feeling really exhausted and feeling like a nap... figure whatever. I wake up too late to make the pharmacy. Next day I let it get way too late and I'm running at the pharmacy at the last minute... don't I reach in my pocket and feel the prescription so I think, only to pull out the receipt for the dentist Like, when I was younger I would have just gotten away with waiting an extra day, now I swear to god it's like Murphy's Law is just 100% in effect for the rest of my life now and anything I don't immediately address gets fucking swallowed by this turd universe, I hate it. What's worse is actually believing the type of things many say about the universe being mental instead of physical opens up the portal to me believing in a special frustrating type of paranormal majik poo where forgetting things doubles in physical reality as them being fucking lost as well. (I mean I don't know if I really believe this, I'm probably just a dumbass, but if you really want to start entertaining magic and miracles then isn't it just oh so fucking great that the only experience I have of these phenomenon frustrations that keep me busy over nothing productive) I actually self harmed over this, of course it seems ridiculous to get upset over this one instance but the combination of the way these things just seem to follow me around like a curse is just so maddening. What's even worse is I am MOST likely to actually lose my mind as if I'm intoxicated once I get in a rage OVER being forgetful.... I just start thrashing things around and throwing things, not even knowing what I threw where. It's a negative spiral that's going to be the end of me I feel. There's so many other things wrong with me, this life is such a joke I could vent for ever and ever and ever... it's not even just this, I have had my ego bruised and shit on in every possible way... of course everything is relative and there's still practically infinite people below me but in the context of my life I am the most pathetic motherfucker there is. I don't even know what could help me, so far in the history of human life there has not been one proven thing that actually ends one's misery (the nature of subjective experience will keep that unprove-able forever I believe)

Whatever you do, don't make your future about 'needing to survive'. A lot of people with depression, long-term mental health problems and suicidal tendencies are in this rut where they are both too afraid to commit to life and too afraid to die (to commit suicide). And with some people, they can even spend decades going in from one deep depression to another, from one psychiatric hospital to another, from one therapist to another, and they basically live a life alternating from moderate to intense despair, yet they never truly fundamentally change. In such a situation, I'd say it's better for them to commit suicide than to continue the same kind of lifestyle. Continuing to live a life in a state of (intermittent) despair and depression and other continuing mental health problems, is worse than just getting it over with and committing suicide, in my opinion. I think it's both amazing and tragic that some people manage to keep on going for that long. I don't understand how they manage to continue for that long despite for them being no light at the end of the tunnel considering the way they continue to live their lives. They don't want to truly come to terms with the fact that the tiny slivers of hope they have is all just fantasy, and that with the way they keep handling themselves there is going to be no hope for the future. Not that you have to commit suicide. And not that there wouldn't be any hope. Not at all. But please, for the love of god, don't become one of these suicidal dabblers who go on living in misery and torment for years, and sometimes even decades (god knows how they do it). You need to come to terms with the fact that you will have to make a very deliberate decision: Are you going to commit to life, or are you going to commit suicide? I'm not going to tell you which choice to make, but all I'm going to say is that if you don't make a decision, life is not going to miraculously resolve itself and you will most likely be in an almost continuous state of misery until the moment you die. Do you understand me? Is that clear to you that you don't really have a choice but to make a choice? I know that truly coming to terms with your situation as I described can be very painful because you will need to confront your inner demons and some of your worst, most dreaded fears. But the prospect of not doing that is so, so much worse. At least in the long term. If you want to commit suicide, you know what to do. Commit all of your energy to it and get it over with. If you want to go for life, then you absolutely need to commit 100% of your life energy towards it and not give the idea of suicide a second thought anymore. You have to totally and utterly cross off suicide as an option in your mind, otherwise it's not going to work. It's not going to work because you will lack full commitment. And the reason you will lack this commitment is because in the back of you're mind you're thinking: "well if this doesn't work out, I can always still commit suicide". If you have that thought in the back of your mind, then when you encounter struggles or obstacles, instead of being fully committed to pushing yourself through that and taking whatever lessons you can out of it, instead of that, you will start fantasizing and thinking about how death could be a sweet release from it all, and then you will start having suicidal fantasies and idealizations, and if you indulge in those fantasies for too long, it will completely destroy that warrior spirit that you may have been able to tap into when you still seemed to be making progress. There are going to be moments when things just don't seem to work out, and you appear to seem stuck, and you will have the tendency to think that "this will never get better". Expect those moments. Those moments are normal. But it is in those moments where it will be decided whether you will succeed or fail in life. If you don't give up during those moments, then you will make it through and then you're well on you're way to creating a magnificent life. But if you allow fear and self-doubt and desire for death drive to overwhelm you during those moments, then you will fail and you will either end up committing suicide, or even worse, continue this cycle of misery for what may seem like an eternity. Remember that your way to a happy, healthy and beautiful life is decided moment to moment. The only power you truly have is the decision you make in this moment, right here, right now. You can only change the future by the way you act NOW. Read the "power of now" by Eckhart Tolle if you want this to be clarified even more deeply to you. If you want to, I have written much of my thoughts on the topic of suicide and suicidality not too long ago on my journal thread here on actualized.org (you can find in through my profile page). But for you convenience, I have copied and pasted what I have written there and put it in an online text sharing site. You can also read it there. I have also brought in other perspectives on the way you can look at suicide and suicidality there. If those perspectives only feel to be confusing to you and they don't connect with you, then simply disregard them. Different perspectives will work for different people at different moments in time or phases in their evolution. Work with what works for you right now, and dismiss what doesn't serve you right now. Here's the link. https://justpaste.it/5se21 You can also contact me by sending me a private message, if you want to.

Ralston had been contemplating since he was a kid in other areas. Ralston is, as he put it, obsessive and has a relentless work ethic. Things didn’t grow on trees for him. He put in the work. He wanted to know. He also, as I’ve heard, suffered a lot. A lot of great enlightened masters I’ve sought out met and I am very fortunate to say have become teachers of mine have had hellish childhoods, ADHD, OCD, drug addiction, suicide attempts, etc. It’s very simple... do you want to know the truth? Are you committed to honesty? Are you committed to follow your heart’s yearning to know, regardless of what that might entail? Are you committed to admit you don’t know shit and that all this regurgitation of insights of giants who’ve come before you is just arrogant bullshit lies and that really you don’t know? Are you committed to taking on the source responsibility of knowing the truth beyond just the ideal of doing so? If yes then you can. Trying to discuss this stuff in technical detail on these matters will never end. It can serve good utility to have a conceptual framework but eventually it really just becomes a distraction and a waste of time and all of it really is wrong at the end of the day. We can make elaborate explanations using things like karma, trauma, “giftedness”, yogic models, Buddhist maps, spiritual texts, stages of ego development, etc. but that discussion hasn’t ended for thousands of years (which is under the assumption of a past and history) and it’s certainly not going to end now. If you want to wake up, go do it. Do whatever you have to do to do that. Stop trying to play compare and contrast of people that in the end don’t exist anyways.

I didn't know about non-duality or anything at the time. It was 2009, so Eckhart Tolle was my first exposure to spirituality after my suicide attempt. No looking back since then and no suicidal tendencies. It was a cross roads for me. Until it was realized there is no "me"

Then, I did this type of work on/off for years. Wasn't until I actually tried it (suicide) and failed that it completely stopped. Real spiritual began after that...

@Emerald It's simply a question of math. Western and increasingly, all post-modern societies are shrinking and disappearing fast (inlcluding East Asia now) with birth rates well below replacement levels. Immigration and much higher birth rates in highly religious traditional societies is taking care of the rest. I wouldn't say I'm pleased about it, but I certainly won't shed any tears over the death of Western Civilisation. Its ongoing suicide and eventual disappearance is entirely self-inflicted.

@Emerald I guess that is that standard progressive argument, but the facts on the ground show it doesn't work. It's rather a moot point anyway, because by the end of the century most "Western" countries will be strict Islamic theocracies. It will actually be a well-deserved outcome, since Western society decided to commit suicide. @Nahm No, I'm really not seeing your point, sorry. The question is, are you seeing mine? I have a feeling that few people here have even read the Bhagavad Gita, the Mahabharata or any of the Puranas and can see the societal destruction and moral turpitude prophesied to happen in the Kali Yuga. I see every sign of it happening now.

It's really complicated and it's very simple! You don't have to do anything because it doesn't matter. You're free to do whatever you want. If you actually really truly want something, there will be a desire that will move you, the desire will take over and remove you from the picture, you won't be existing at all, and you won't be asking these questions. You're only asking these questions because you are afraid. The fear is manifesting through your questions which are meant to make sure that you (Mr. Ego i.e. imaginary self) won't die. But you can already see how futile that is! This imaginary self is still in control and it needs to die, but it's trying to survive through asking such questions. There's no answer here. You have to die. Of course, don't go suicide, you're smarter than that.

Hey guys, This might be a bit of a long rant, so sorry in advance for that. I don't even know where to begin. 5 Years ago, my life was average. It wasnt great, but it wasnt misery either. I had petty problems, spent too much time playing video games, but I had a great girlfriend, a promising career and some good friends. Since then, my life went downhill into the dirt. My father died of cancer , my girlfriend left me and I fell into a deep depression. I discovered Actualized.Org, tried starting to fix my life, but everything I did, I did seriously wrong. I quit my promising IT career after the LP Course, knowing that my LP would be either psychology or music. Started studying psychology, but my depression fucked me up after half a semester and I ended up in a mental hospital, because of suicidal intent. (I went there on my own free will). After a few months I started living back home with my mom, no career, few friends, no romantic relationships (Even mentioning that you struggled or are struggling with depression lets girls run away faster than a train, even when before they just told you how much they like you), 800 Euro in debt, cause I have no income and cant control my impulses, waking up everyday with a feelin of dread, trying desperately to do things that help me climb out of this shithole, but failing continiously at the simplest of tasks. I have no motivation left, because any hope I try to give myself gets crushed by the reality of where the last 5 years of trying have left me. I dont want to even consider the future, because all I see is ruin. I can't sit down and compose, because the feeling of inadiquacy and failure crushes me. I can't meditate more than 10 minutes because I cant stand the pain. I just waste away, feeling sad about the fact that Im such a failure that I cant even commit to a way of suicide because all of it seems to hard. I dont even know why I am typing this its not like you can help me with your "aCcEpT YoUr FfElINgS" "tAkE pSyCheDelIcS" or "wOnDeR wHo Is fEeLiNg pAiN wHeN yOu aRe gOD".... Sorry for that immature ourburst, but I dont feel like holding up any kind of social kindness. I dont have any left, I guess.

@Leo Gura You're making these irrational excuses for them because you're attached to this idea of Trump being the most corrupt person ever. You want it to be so true. Hillary Clinton told a room full of wallstreet donors that "(she) believes in having a private position and a public position" and then went on to cheat Bernie out of the primaries. They've done way more bad than good. Their actions are driven by receiving money from lobbyists; from fossil fuel, to pharma, to prison, to MIC, the banks etc. Then they started their own organization, the Clinton Foundation, which, for one example, took advantage of an earthquake in Haiti to sell cheap food while the local markets were damaged. They put local markets out of business and then increased the price to unaffordable standards. They know the statistics of how damaging laws like NAFTA, the 94 Crime Bill, and canceling welfare were towards people and the millions of civilian casualties resulted from their horrible foreign policy. They even admit it saying "it was a mistake blah blah blah, but" and then they go on pushing for another similar policy and also doing nothing to repeal their damaging policies that were already passed while they're in positions of power. They know the damages, they just simply don't care in their elitist circle in the same exact way that Trump doesn't care in the very same elitist circle about personal enrichment. Their kids are friends with each other and they all invite each other to weddings and other grand events. It's all about career and personal gain for these people. Their foreign policy was done to please their corporate donors. They don't care about civilian lives, they know how damaging increased fossil fuel emissions are to the planet, they just pretend to care and then continue to push for damaging laws anyway. All to personally enrich themselves. Pretending to be on the side of the people by saying they agree with science on climate change yet pushing for these damaging policies like fracking and taking control of other countries for their oil is worse than being up front about not caring. At least we know what side you stand. In the wide words of Malcom X: "The white liberal differs from the white conservative only in one way: the liberal is more deceitful than the conservative. The liberal is more hypocritical than the conservative. Both want power, but the white liberal is the one who has perfected the art of posing as the Negro's friend and benefactor; and by winning the friendship, allegiance, and support of the Negro, the white liberal is able to use the Negro as a pawn or tool in this political "football game" that is constantly raging between the white liberals and white conservatives." There's also documented evidence of the Clintons knowing about Harvey Weinstein and trying to bury that story just because he was a big donor to them. Not to mention a study that came out recently that showed how statistically impossible it is for so many people to have died tragically (on accident or through suicide) and be connected to one person (Hillary Clinton).

who knows but I think guided meditations can really guide you to see things that may have taken a lot longer than they would have before, I love rupert spiras guided meditations and I also love doing short little meditations while I wait for water to boil or the bus to arrive or if I wake up in the middle of the night... and also eckhart tolle was on the verge of committing suicide when he became enlightened so maybe it's great to have your life in order first but maybe not

@ethanb121 Dude.... I had developed Pure O as well, I struggled with many kinds of ocd my whole life but basically few years ago I developed HOCD. Which was some of the worst kind of shit I have ever gone through...Struggled with it a lot and I FEEL YOU SO MUCH. It felt like I was trapped in my own personal hell and mental prison and I basically dealt with this shit for almost 2 years... It completely dominated my entire life and everyday was terrible. Never ever contemplated about suicide but I get why somebody might. Anyway, today I can honestly say with incredible pride that I am free of that shit for basically 1.5 years or so. Never went to any kind of doctor or therapist and I worked it out on my own. Through awareness and meditation. Im telling you dude. START MEDITATING. Everyday. For 20mins at least. When this Pure O shit started I had already developed a religious meditation routine but after the HOCD happened the meditation I did helped me immensely. Start meditating and watch Leo's video of "Awareness is Curative. How to Autocorrect unwanted behaviours" Over and over if you must. And also the How to Let Go video. That is exactly how I overcame this Pure O hell and my other OCD's as well. When, the intrusive thoughts hit you, JUST OBSERVE THEM. Don't judge yourself for having these thoughts. This is KEY. Just OBSERVE THEM and LET THEM GO. YOU ARE NOT YOUR THOUGHTS. YOU ARE NOT YOUR THOUGHTS. YOU ARE NOT YOUR THOUGHTS. You are stuck in a vicious loop right now. The only way to get out of it is awareness and letting them go. You CANNOT get out of this by more rationalizations or justifications or trying to prove to yourself "that" or to prove to yourself "this". The PROVING NEVER ENDS. And its a TRAP. This OCD shit is so fucking powerful that the intrusive thoughts you have even affect your body and make you actually feel "sensations" and "vibrations" in your body and even if there isnt ACTUALLY anything like that, you PERCEIVE that there is something like that going on. This Pure O hell I went through made me appreciate actually how powerful thoughts are. That was one of the key golden nuggets I got from this experience. This video really helped me a lot. Check this womans other videos as well. I feel you bro, hopefully I helped you out. Lemme know if I you need more advice

When I accept them it makes me feel like a messed up person because im accepting the fact that I could be a rapist pedophile murderer even though I dont have any desire to do that and it makes my self esteem even lower I kinda tried that route and I stopped doing everything because how bad the thoughts were I try meditating but its really hard and it makes the thoughts more intense for the first little while which is really discomforting because I dont enjoy these thoughts ... Sometimes I wish to myself I did so I could live atleast some what normal not hating myself all the time and thinking im a monster for having these thoughts cuz I know they are wrong and dont wanna ever act on them ... The thoughts about pedophilia bothers me the most though ... I havent been eating good and exercise is hard for me because I feel like my life is falling apart and am contemplating suicide

Continuation of the previous post (typed only 10 days later lel) Until at some point whilst traveling back to the airbnb in Germany just over the border north of Basel (I had explored Basel that day), the thought suddenly came in that… What if it’s all just okay? What if committing suicide is not tragic? What if I stop saying to myself that it’s not okay to do it? What if I stop thinking of suicide as a failure of life? What If I completely give myself a free pass to be able to do it? And suddenly I realized that perhaps the idea that suicide was something to be avoided was simply not true. And this realization evoked such a tremendous feeling of peace and relief in me. I suddenly felt like there was absolutely no requirements for me anymore on at least the level of action that life required from me. I suddenly felt such an immense feeling of relief and elation, and… freedom. Yes, that’s what it was. Total freedom. The freedom to be and do whatsoever you want. The feeling that every possible outcome was totally okay. And the interesting thing is, with this feeling of elation and freedom and peace, then who the hell feels interested to commit suicide in that state? For what? That’s the great paradox. Total acceptance of the idea of suicide creates total peace, and in total peace, nobody is really interested in taking their own lives. That’s why I promote people accepting their suicidality. Not even so much because then they won’t commit suicide, but because then it will take them out of their suicidal struggles. They then will come to know what peace is, if they really fully grasp this realization. I have however heard of sages who choose suicide whilst being very conscious. Perhaps it’s just them being able to leave the body at will without needing to hang or shoot themselves or whatever, but it’s the same concept. There may be a way to choose your own death that does not involve or is based on a lot of despair. But for one to have this realization that I had, one has to let go of many assumptions. 1. One has to let go of the assumption that you would do harm to friends and relatives. You do harm them, but that does not mean that that harm would be a wrong thing if you look from the perspective of the absolute. It may trigger existential questioning in them which would help them to evolve quicker on their own path. 2. One has to let go of the assumption that you would face some kind of punishment for committing suicide, or that it otherwise would be a bad thing. I’m talking about either the creation of karmic debt, or the idea that religion has about ending up in hell. 3. Related to the point above (but not the same), one also has to let go of the idea that committing suicide is a wastage of life and therefore some form of sin. I don’t think I really wanna talk about why the idea of something like a geographical hell is totally irrational and how it has been used to manipulate people by invoking fear in them. I feel like this doesn’t require too much deep introspection, research and contemplation for one to come to the insight that the idea of hell is very much based on fear instead of truthfulness. But the idea that you would face karmic punishment or that otherwise just the general attitude that committing suicide is some form of sin or wastage, is one I want to address. From an atheistic standpoint, if a moment is all that one would be, then why should it matter if it ends sooner or later? There is only sentimental attachments to life, but no real valid reason as to why one shouldn’t be able to commit suicide. Atheists may get this sense of being a failure or having ‘wasted’ their lives if they commit suicide, but this idea doesn’t really hold much ground. It’s more about the story they tell themselves about what suicide means. But in reality, it holds no true ground. And even if you’re a failure for ending your own life, then simply be a failure. What does it matter if you’re a failure or not, taken in the perspective that you are literally nothing n comparison to the infinite scope of existence. What does one more failure really signify? One may come to take the sentiment of not wanting to hurt others again, but again, just because they are hurt by your suicide, doesn’t mean that it wouldn’t necessarily be for the greater good, as it provokes things and puts pressure to evolve on people. And for the one that believes in reincarnation, karmic punishment or retribution or whatever… Well, taking in the scope if the totality of existence… Why do we suffer in the first place? Why would we struggle in the first place? Is putting an end to suffering —the whole wheel of suffering throughout the reincarnations— as quickly as possible really the ultimate ideal? Do we just experience suffering to get rid of it as quickly as possible? Then why are we here experiencing suffering in the first place? That is even assumed that there would be some karmic drawback to committing suicide, and that it additionally would increase the total sum of suffering you would come to experience throughout your incarnations. And do we really know that that is true? Perhaps when one commits suicide, one chooses to do so because one sees the circumstances in his current incarnation (on an unconscious level) as unfit to continue with that incarnation, and therefore chooses to commit suicide so one can choose once again to reincarnate in a different set of circumstances that would be much more ideal for the continuation of his/her spiritual development. Possibly suicide can even be a wise choice to make. Who knows? But I don’t except most people to be able to have the realization to the same extent that I had because most people are too attached to some assumption or judgement about what suicide means for them, and what suicide means n the larger context of things. For most people, I think I would clarify to them both what valid reasons there can be to take their own lives, and what reasons there can be to fully commit to life, and then I would allow them to make the choice. I think for most people in a suicidal position, it requires a commitment and a very deliberate act of will to get out of it (in whatever way they choose to get out of it). For some other people, it may require them to very deliberately try to fully accept all of their circumstances and their negative feelings and just make ‘trying to let go and accept’ their practice. I feel almost tempted to call them the ‘power of now-people’. Of course, trying to let go isn’t the same as actually letting go, as they may not be able to actually fully let go through insight and realization, but it may take them further along their path. For some other people, perhaps their appropriate primary focus is doing a lot of introspection and contemplation about what it all means, what’s life all about, how suicide fits into the picture… They perhaps need some time to ‘figure it all out’, to really think about the most fundamental questions of existence. And once again for some other people, they simply fully understand the insight that I had had when I was in/near Basel in Switzerland in 2018. They realize that there is absolutely nothing wrong with suicide. These people come to experience that if there is no reason to fear death, that it simultaneously allows them to fully dive into life also without any struggle. Life opens up to them. One can only be fully alive if one has fully let go of either the desire or fear of death. People who on some conscious or unconscious level either desire or fear death (usually both), can never come to know what it means to be fully alive. Granted, this realization that I had in Switzerland isn't something that became fully embodied on a permanent basis —I'm certainly not fully enlightened yet (if ever)— but the realization did have a tremendous impact nevertheless and it is probably the most impactful insight that I've ever had.

You're such a treasure for folks on this forum. Moreover, people who commited suicide out of depression from the pursuit of enlightenment would probably changed their mind if they'd read what you say here Bravo !

I have not been referring to the OP. I have been referring to responses to the OP. No I shouldn't. I am concerned about both depressed incels as well as women that are sexually objectified and used for sex with disregard for their wellbeing. If depressed incels end up committing suicide, it does not justify objectifying and using women for sex with no regard for their welfare. I would try to help the man in pursuing women in a way that involves mutual consent and mutual desire. If an incel is not in this place, he needs to work through his issues. It is not right to use women as sexual objects to treat one's own depression. You are seeing this from the male's perspective, not the female's perspective. Yes, you have said this several times. I understand. I actually think we have quite a bit of common ground, yet our communication is not on the same frequency. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

@Consept Yeh definitely understanding is great! I just never thought that people feel relief when they first start finding out new things about their sexuality, I thought it is mostly shocking or at least like a weird territory kinda feeling. It seemed kinda natural and true to think this, because these kinds of people have much higher suicide rates than heterosexuals, in which I cannot find a relationship with relief, but it might be more complex than that. I might ask more people about this...

@hundreth You didn't deny that reality was a hallucination you just questioned why I wouldn't commit suicide. There's no point in suicide when you are already dead.

I've always been uncomfortable with the abortion debate because it's all very difficult to reconcile. I think both sides really suck, and there is no part of the issue that doesn't. That said, I'm very pro-choice. And I always had this intuition that it would be really dystopian and oppressive if the government came in and banned abortion. You'd see a rise in back-alley abortions, suicide, infanticide, and child abuse to force women to carry a child and give birth. And it would also lead to lots of abandoned children and children given up for adoption, which would add further weight to the foster care system which is already packed with unadopted kids. So, even though I agree that a fetus is a life in the general sense of the word, I think it's a much better solution to let women make their own decisions with their bodies. And that's because death really isn't the worst thing in the world. Suffering is. So, I think banning abortion would lead to more suffering... and likely just as many, if not more, deaths.

@Farnaby Check out Metta meditation, you will learn to cultivate that feeling of love within you. You begin by feeling love towards things that you already love (conditionally). Then you can expand that love to eventually include everything in the universe, including your worst enemies and all the things you hate about yourself (unconditional). "May all beings be happy" is a great mantra to bring about that state of absolute loving acceptance, at least for me. But you have to do it very sincerely. Realize that deep down you really want EVERYONE to be happy, realize it and see how you feel. If that's too difficult at first, imagine everybody you know, also people you hate going through extreme suffering. Horrible diseases, cancer, aids, chemical burns, extreme depression, suicide etc. Now it should be much easier to feel the compassion, then just expand it to include more people, including yourself. Imagine yourself comforting yourself, hugging yourself for going through so much unnecessary suffering. Hope this helps mate

I’m not an expert if social dynamics in the UK, yet I do have some experience. I’ve traveled to dozens of foreign countries, many of which were predominantly white. I currently live in a poor community that is about 50% black and 50% white. The school system has collapsed, unemployment is about 50%. Crime, abuse, alcoholism and drug addiction is high. I’ve volunteered with alcoholics, drug addicts, prison system and psychiatric wards with people of various socio-economic and ethnic backgrounds. At the individual level, I don’t give higher priority to the suffering of one ethnicity over the other. If I’m in a hospital with a woman that just attempted suicide after years of abuse, my empathy and compassion is not influenced by the color of her skin. To me, what you are getting at is wealth inequality that leads to corruption, abuse of power and suffering. I see it everyday in my community. Being penniless is a major stressor, regardless of one’s ethnicity. Poverty and being on the edge of survival can contribute to mental illness and domestic violence. This is something we can all come together on. Economic justice is one of my highest values. And the ultra wealthy billionaires want the current system of economic injustice. Part of that game is to divide people along ethnic lines. Black vs brown vs white. The last thing they want is the poor and working classes to come together. I would place this economic class injustice as a higher priority than racial injustice. If we can move toward economic justice for all, a lot of the racial injustices will begin to survive. One source of racial tension is that so many people are poor and living paycheck to paycheck. In this hyper survival mode, racial differences het leveraged. Economic injustice is a major issue, yet that doesn’t erase cases of injustice that are disproportionate to black and brown people. At a population level, their are injustices that disproportionately affect minorities. Those are not the only issues we should address, yet they are still issues to be addressed. For example, in most western countries, black and brown people have disproportionately less access to healthcare, education and upward mobility. Black and brown people are disproportionately impacted by racism. Does this mean that white people are never affected by low access to health care, education and upward mobility? Does this mean white people never face racism? Of course not. Yet does this mean we should neglect disproportionate power and oppression. We can address both. This is one reason I resonate with Bernie so strongly. He understands both. He understands how wealth inequality and disproportionate wealth power structures negatively impact poor people of all ethnicities. And he understands how racism disproportionately affects people of certain races. And I like how his top priority is to go after wealth inequality. I think doing so will relieve a lot of underlying racial tensions.

You did not understand me at all, just to stuck in your emotions, my post was about human general reaction toward such approach. You do not know anything about me, or where I was born , it might come as surprise to you, but white people live in way more countries then USA are you well informed about how white people live in different parts of world? I can tell you few stories too, just to show how silly your compromising are , about white males, who grew up in dysfunctional families, in worse poverty then you have in USA, not being able to afford anything they had to make their living by stealing, being looked down like they are trash by everyone and being told to anyone that comes into contact with them to stay away from them, not bad people, just desperate circumstances, years passed but nothing could change constant physical and psychological abuse by everyone around them pushed them to limit to commit worst of crime , killing in attempt to get money from old lady, Now the time I saw both of them 3 years ago they were out from prison, one was completely mentally damaged,like beaten dog, other had just lost his brother who committed suicide, completely depressed about life, last year I visited one who lost brother committed suicide too .

Is Reincarnation Real? How does it work? If someone commits suicide, to what kind of a life will he reincarnate? Will he start from zero in terms of consciousness work or will he continue from where he stopped?

Wednesday January 15th to Thursday January 16th Let's talk a bit about suicide and suicidality, shall we? I had wanted to write an essay about this and post it here on the actualized.org forums, but I have forsaken that plan, at least for now, because I had both lost the inspiration to write that essay any further (I had already started it), and it also felt to be a bit more controversial and intense than I really felt comfortable with. It simply didn't feel right to post it. The insights and arguments I used in that essay, and the way I was going to convery them, can be very frightening to certain people because I addressed there some of the worst and darkest human fears, and also one of the greatest taboos and collective delusions. The final conlusion, however, is a hopeful and positive one. I'm going to talk about it now anyway, so buckle up and read it at your own risk, or otherwise just don't read it at all. I'm not going to be as provocative or intense as I was going to be in that essay, though. Okay Sometimes I read these stories of people having suffered from major depressive episodes, and/or forms of anxiety, and/or all other kinds of mental problems, and having been through a long time of all this sometimes intense suffering, they end up committing suicide. And when I read something like that, I can't help to wonder why this person allowed him/herself to be in such a position of this state of deep suffering for so many years? It's one of the things I fail to really grasp about other people: Why are some people willing to encounter massive amounts of suffering and still aren't willing to actually put an end to it for years and years, and sometimes even decades? (It's not essential here whether 'putting an end to it' means suicide or changing their life around) I can understand it from a superficial intellectual position, but I can't really resonate with the attitude of these kind of people at all. Like really, you've been going through bouts of deep depression and despair for like 10 years straight, and still you don't think that perhaps it's time to make some drastic changes in your life? No? 10 years of torment still isn't sufficient enough? Need some more? Well, you'll get more. What else do you expect to happen? Do you think some miracle will take place in your life and overnight all of this suffering will be miraculously abolished? You're not Eckhart Tolle! It perplexes me... I understand what these people are doing though. Most likely they are addicted to some or many forms of distraction so that they do not have to face their own emotions and their fears. They avoid the existential yet rather necessary questions that they would need to ask to themselves if they truly want to put a stop to their suffering, because asking those questions would mean they would have to confront very frightening possibilities. So what they do is that they are willing to settle for a long-term terrible life prospect so that they don't have to face some even more intense short-term pain and suffering that comes with confronting your inner demons. But of course, if you do gather the courage and confront the demons, it will be your first step out of that nightmare you have found yourself in. But some people are just too afraid. Ironically, the one thing they truly should fear is their cowardice, because their cowardice is the reason they have found themselves in that position and the reason they will stay stuck in it. From a rational standpoint, there is nothing to be more afraid of for them than their cowardice. But of course, it's not like many of these people haven't tried to change their lives at multiple points, but they have failed the commitment to stick with it. You can address multiple reasons to why that has failed, but one way you can put it is that the primary reason that they have failed to commit to changing their lives, is the fact that it wasn't obvious enough to them that they absolutely HAD to. This is how it all changed for me. When I started having intense panic attacks in early 2013, at some point I started having this very painful but very intense sense of urgency. I realized that if I allowed myself to be a coward for just even a second, then how I was I ever going to have peace with the fact that I had been living life less than what was optimal? This awareness and this urgency was so clear and so sharp, that awareness that something HAD to be done, that it kind of felt like having a black hole right behind my back and that if I did allow myself to be a coward for even one second, I was going to be sucked up by this black hole, and this black hole would take me straight to the deepest layer of hell. That's how it felt sometimes back then. For me it was just very clear (at least so I thought at the time) that there was no rational argument as to why I would allow myself to be controlled by fear, and I didn't see how I was going to forgive myself had I allowed myself to succumb to fear. On top of that, I also had a strong sense that if I allowed myself to believe in one excuse, then why not the second excuse, or the third excuse? I was using an audio program for overcoming panic attacks at the time in which the guy really emphasized the importance of taking action, and he also told about people who didn't overcome it because they weren't willing to face their fears. I back then had not estimate as to how courageous I really was or wasn't in comparison to other people suffering from anxiety attacks, so I absolutely dreaded the possibility of me failing to live up to the challenge and sliding back into this hell realm that I was struggling to get myself out of. For me, that possibility seemed very real and I wanted to do absolutely everything I possibly could in order to try to prevent that. Having that been the start of the beginning of my awakening process, I now find it so difficult to understand why other people who from an outer viewpoint appear to be going to similair or even worse struggles, how other people like that do not feel this intense sense of urgency to change. And so when I see people like that, I can only wonder: Do they not realize? Do they not care enough? Isn't it obvious enough to them? Those people might say about themselves that they simply lack the willpower, or the courage or whatever. They might even start believing that they're a hopeless case. But I will say differently: They simply don't understand. It's not clear enough to them. Because actually, the urgency isn't even so much about needing to improve and change their life around, but it's about putting a stop to all of it, in whatever means possible. All it takes is one honest moment for such a person and to admit to themselves: This NEEDS to stop. In whatever way possible, this absolutely NEEDS to stop. And yes, maybe they'll come to the decision that the idea of changing their life around and rising out of their misery isn't worth it for them, or perhaps they may think it's not even possible (for them), and they end up committing suicide. And you know what? To me, that's absolutely fine. It's fine because at least they finally made a conscious decision to face death. To improve your life for the better by working really hard on yourself and to rise out of it is also facing death, and you could argue that perhaps that would be the better decision, but whether it's suicide or dedicated self-actualization, at least they FINALLY, FUCKING FINALLY put a stop to all of it. You see my sentiment here? If someone puts an end to their torment that may have been going on for years or even decades by committing suicide... Good for them. At least they finally made that decision to face death. All I truly care about for those people is for them to be relieved from their struggle, whatever route they may take to get to that point. I don't really hold judgement against people who commit suicide. I do feel like there was potential for more for them in this life and in that way it's perhaps a bit unfortunate, but hey, perhaps in a next life they will choose good circumstances to incarnate (if that's actually what happens, idk for sure) and maybe they will give a much better shot at it this time. I don't really like the way people regard suicide as 'tragic'. Because this whole notion of it being 'tragic' creates such a taboo around this topic, just as there is a taboo about death in general in the west. One can start feeling very guilty towards their own suicidal feelings because they are both feeling guilty towards themselves for wasting their potential, and towards others (relatives and friends and so forth) for hurting them by that person choosing to commit suicide. People get conditioned that suicidal feelings are not okay, although people may not directly say it that way to them. So people hide it, both from others and from themselves. But just because you're hiding it doesn't mean you become less suicidal. In fact, the very guilt creates an inner conflict between the death drive within them that wants a release from their suffering on one side, and both their fear of death and the guilt they feel on the other side. And ironically, because the person starts fighting against the suicidalit feelings and thoughts because they are 'unwished for', the more that person reinforces their guilt, starts creating more inner struggle, making them more miserable, and because they are more miserable, suicide becomes even more attractive as a for of release from it all. In fact, it becomes a form of hope. Many people are too afraid to fully commit to life because they fantasize about suicide as an option. "If all else fails, I can always still simply end my life". If you romanticize and put your hopes suicide (even if you do it unconsciously), then how can you expect such a person to really go all-in on life? It won't happen. It won't happen because people don't get anywhere if they half-ass something. Full determination can only happen if the alternative is not considered as an option anymore (actually, this is not true at higher stages of consciousness. But I'd say for most people that that statement is true). What do you think you are going to achieve if the option of suicide is always in the back of your mind? You will lack devotion, because you are not fully sure of yourself that this is really want you want to be doing. When I was getting out of my panic attacks in 2013, suicide, for some reason I still don't really know for sure, is just something I didn't even want to consider for a single second. The idea of it just seemed so dreadful, that I couldn't even permit myself a single second of fantasizing on the possibility. Because of that reason, I HAD to go all-in on life. And therefore, I've gotten to the point I've gotten to now where I've grown tremendously in the past 7 years (although my attitude has shifted quite a bit over the course of these 7 years, but that's a different story) I understand that not every person automatically has this commitment right from the start. Maybe not everybody sees suicide as something that is not an option for themselves in the way I felt it. Maybe in some way, I was fortunate. If I can't invoke a feeling of commitment and devotion in a person even if I really clearly explain that not making a decision in their position is not going to give them a better life than they already had, then certainly there are more alternatives. One thing I can do is try to take away their suicidal guilt. Much of the suicidal feelings come from the fact that the person feels guilty about the suicidal feelings to begin with. It's a vicious circle. I will explain to them why they don't have to feel guilty towards other people for it ("It might be a relief to them", "It may take them on a new path, a new journey to find out the meaning of their lives", "It may confront them with the truth of death, which isn't comfortable, but in the end, truth is inevitably going to be faced so merely acclerate the process for them") I would also take away the guilt they feel towards themselves for the idea that they're a coward for doing it or wasting their own potential ("What do you mean it's weak? Do you realize how much courage it takes to face death like that?", "Why should you have any obligations to fulfill to actualize your potential? Where is this responsibility other than your own ideas about it? Why should you not be able to be a coward?") "Won't that make them more likely to commit suicide then?", you may ask. It's possible, but probably not. Besides, whether they do or don't end up committing suicide is not the point, remember? If you can relieve someone from the guilt they carry around their suicidal feelings, you will take away a large part of their suffering, and therefore a large part of their suicidality. Imagine if this person actually gets it and suddenly becomes completely okay with the idea of them committing suicide. But I say completely okay with the idea. You might not realize the relief that this actually invokes. I had an awakening on the topic of suicide in november 2018 whilst I was on a trip (not a pyschedelic trip) in Switzerland. I actually had been suicidal in 2017 (You might be curious as to how and why that happened. You can find more details on that on the justpaste.it link in the very first post of this thread) And in november 2018, I wasn't actively suicidal, depressed or desperate or anything, but there was this sort of strange fear that I might end up committing suicide at one point in the future, and i dreaded the idea. Will edit this further later. Need to take some rest now.

Me? F'In millions. I'm on social media posting my research ALL the time and adding value by providing info. What are you talking about? For example I'm adding value now by exposing bullshit everyone's eating from Mooji. I provided enough info to make up your own mind with common sense (lets not jump into cognitive dissonance because we feel strongly towards someone and afraid our beliefs will get shattered.) THERE are people in his cult committed suicide. Ya great help. AND He's preaching bullshit. Why would anyone advocate this? Just because some people in here feel "strongly" and attached to him doesn't mean mooji is a "guru"as many as you want them to think. He helped No one. NOt one person. Everything I stated is what a guru is a true "buddha". And MOOJI is not one. How do you know what "mooji" would say. Do you know him personally? are you his cult follower? I know People personally who attending HIS satsangs personally and LEFT. And there are literally 1000's of others as well leaving his 'ashram'... I seen All his shit. IF you want to keep drinking the KOOL aid be my guest. I'm done with this mooji shit and I will expose all these cult leaders even if others feel "strongly" towards them. No one said the truth is going to be easy or pretty. Most of the responses in the thread are just more new age hippy BS with 0 understanding of natural law and dwell in just abstract theories so I care little for their response. Like that watered down version of "what a shaman is". Give me a break. @Visionary knows a bit, I can tell. Hence why you were tagged. You're still a neophyte. One day padawan.