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@actualizing25 it's ok to pursue peace. Even understanding God and reality can help with that. You may find there is more to life than not suffering. When you do have moments of bliss, think to yourself: "ok, what's next?"

It sounds like you’re kinda shitting on your own parade man. The relativity of meaning is only a downside if you’re being shortsighted. There are ultimately no limits that have to contain you. You can develop in many different directions. There are levels of meaning you can create for yourself which would make you explode with joy and bliss. It’s a really underexposed idea in spirituality. Everyone is focused on deconstruction and getting rid of attachments and such that they miss the bigger picture. This is your creative roadshow. Stop trying to escape it. You can create the most amazing experience for yourself and in some cases others thanks only to accurate Self knowledge. P.S. - You’re not necessarily wrong with anything you say. From an absolute level, things do not have prescribed meaning. The issue is this realization gives you the freedom to create a very positive or negative outlook. What’s the advantage in choosing a negative perspective for yourself when both are equally valid?

All polar opposites balance each-other out perfectly. Bliss and suffering. Heaven and Hell. God and The Devil. All of those are perceived dualities. Only Oneness is Absolute. In that sense; I'd say you're wrong. But I get what you mean. The bad screams in your face. While the good might be difficult to notice sometimes. But it's always there.

Acting like you know the specific content of what comes after death is an epistemic error in likely all cases. The fact is that this is an imagined moment which we project our various conceptual maps onto. Nothing is likely to get it 100% right, and maybe it’s different for everyone. I tend to think that Existence is far more individualized. The lesson is for you, generated by you in real time. So yes, I agree that DMT bliss states are a horrible measure to use for explaining all of Reality or future events. Why is there a bias toward one chemical group or one virtue? It’s all valid. The future will likely be something you can neither predict or accept using your current paradigm. This is a pattern I’ve noticed in my own life and pretty much everyone else’s life.

Good day, genuine truth seekers, who thirst for knowledge, like a man stranded on desert thirsts for water. Epistemology, ie. one`s theory of knowledge and is always worth to be in check of, its ones best tool to differentiate truth from delusions. Some people have the conviction that Direct Experience = Truth, some say it is the Mind, others say its all the same, i.e. Mind = Direct experience. However, I see that almost all people have bias, even if they try very hard to be objective, disregarding the obivious fact that, solely due to the fact that they are reasoning from a human POV, full objectivity is not possible, at least until one un-learns to think like a human, with what human finds attractive etc. For example, someone does DMT and has a beautiful experience, then, same person does Salvia and has scary experience. Then, afterwards, the person shares the message that afterlife is more like a DMT bliss, but, what if afterlife is like Salvia? BUT? What if none of this models are necessary because whatever one I call "reality" is just my own imagination, i other words, I am not bound by "reality". Because : Think about it, one experiences both a DMT Bliss and Salvia Scariness, which shows the person that Consciousness can be many things. But due to bias, the person believes that after death he will go to DMT bliss, sounds bias isnt it? Then how does one confirm to oneself, what afterlife is more like? And who gets to decide for the person? If the person decides - why cant the same person dictate over their current earth-reality? What/Who stops them from this?

please read the whole trip report. i dont understand why just 100ug LSD took me soo far and just this is my 1st Actual trip. so two days ago i had done 100ug and the trip lasted 14 hours. I have reached God level and realised I am the creator and I created this so called universe for me to realise and come to back to Me. i divide the this trip into 3 parts 1. My intentions for the trip 2. The trip 3. Post Trip 1. I was building up the dose so previously had done 25ug and now built to 100ug and then then take 200ug based on this trip experience. As i read the reports i came to know that 100ug is a mild dose and is bets for contemplation and cannot experience ego death and any mystical exp. and my intentions for the trip to contemplate on my life purpose and how to avoid distraction and why im getting distracted. and also regarding my spiritual path and awakening. And I decided to surrender whatever happens in this trip. very simple 2. As the trip began I was in a normal state and couldn't contemplate just waiting for the peak. At this point the visuals becoming intense and then I just layed and started to feel heavy in my limbs and felt like I dont have any of them. I just surrendered and then i started to feel the interconnectedness with everything. I got up and i feel i lost complete identity of my self. I am speaking to myself as a 3rd person. at this point there were so many questions i am asking and the the state i am there is giving answer to everything. wherever i see there are infinite fractals open and close eye. Now i ahd reached a place which is absolute infinity and i got merged into it. i felt like everything is me and this the pure infitie consciousness which leo speaks. I GOT ENLIGHTENED. I realised i am everthing, i touched my mother brothers and crying saying that this is the ultimate place everyone should reach, all this reality is created for us to awaken and reached your true place. the place was infite having infinite colours, infinite shapes, i felt everyhting is possible here and this created my world. I realised that I am in a game and i used a cheatcode (LSD) just to ask about my purpose and and this code took me out of the game and said GAME OVER and made me realise that this is a game and your true place is absolute infinity. this gave a huge responsibility that this illusion is totally for my self and i can do anything to grow my self here and nothing can stop me. I was trying to remember all of this cos I knew i would forget all of this makes no sense. I became God I had so many Qs and all the answers. suffering is just an illusion when you know everything is pure love and all is one. I had asked the question about rape and got this beautiful insight that, I the victim, i am the accused, i am the one who murdered, and i am the one mourning, and i am the one reporting. this made so much sense that there's no point in suffering when all this is an illusion and god doesn't want you to suffer. At this point I have no emotions and couldnt distinguish between anger, sadness, hatred etc. I realised i am no longer this physical body and no longer Vignan hence theres no place for emotions. Then I reached to a place which I called the infinite mind. Frankly speaking here I see no love or anything. Its an infite sphere enclosed in an infite wave like thing. There is no such thing as time, intelligence, its just being. I saw it and understood this is god and here theres no bliss as such how people mention. It is a place of no human intelect. From this arose infite Love when i realised the struggle humanity which is me strugglein to get enlighten but running away from it at the same time. I realised my trure purpose is to bring everyone into the infinite conscious which I felt the highest purpose of an enlighten being. 3. Now after the trip I am in a state of crisis. i read the book TOE and bagavad gita and realised that I have reached the true, pure absolute infinity. But as i am back to my ego self i longer can understand what happened to me and i am in a state of confusion what happened to me is real or not. Leos recent God video makes absolute sense and now I don know how do I carry it with me in sobriety. How do I keep the learning? Now I have no thoughts whatsoever my mind is so calm that im unable to do anything. i became like a dead person yet many things running inside me. I realised my life purpose and dont no now how do i proceed. I need give my love and good to this humaninity. I want to make everyone happy and help them reach their true self. Leo I need you to help me regarding the post trip integration I couldnt even comprehend the magnite of states that I reached. I understood the base level consciousness cannot comprehend what is at higher lever and higher level of conscious cannot do the base level task. How do I find the balance cos most of the time I will be living in this dream state only. How do I maintain that level of consciousness while im not tripping?

Thanks Shin- Yes. This I get. Many years ago based on research and experimentation, I reached the conclusion that matter and energy are illusory. They are only ideas around which the experience of physical reality is formed. I think of it as the scaffolding on which our experiences can occur. It gives us a stage on which we can play our our individual dramas. Here's the question I am trying to get at: If those who physically die, immediately reach a state of non-dual existence, then what are they doing having a dualistic experience? There seems to be an objective experience happening following death since there are cases where it can objectively be shown to have occurred. It seems as though many or most experiencers seem to simply move to a non-physical state of non-dual existence where a life-like story continues. Feels to me like this dual to non-dual transition is not a binary thing that happens spontaneously at death, but rather a thing that we need to work on, perhaps over many iterations of birth-death. ? Also the question still remains for me: if/when we reach this state of non-dual existence, especially considering its unsurpassable bliss, why would we even consider acting in a non-dual way again? Why would we be put that garment back on? Of course the "we" is no longer in existence, but it seems like some intention toward more dualism cycles is still in play. Would this cycle between convergence and divergence just represent the "design of the system" and not intention? And finally: where is the history of all that has occurred stored? We can't deny that experiences have occurred, right? Physicality aside: things have happened. Love has been exchanged, emotions have been felt. There are many examples where one incarnate can recall the experiences of another. This implies that this information doesn't vanish when someone has becomes "realized".

I was taken into the light of Source itself. It started within like 15 seconds of the meditation beginning. It was quite unexpected. Meditation had been quite weak for me. But I fully committed myself to learning more from a spiritual guide yesterday, and today I had a breakthrough. It was such a healing space to be in. Truly remarkable.

Culadasa the author of The mind illuminated is dying of cancer. It's interesting to hear the experience of a master meditator (first part of the video) It's interesting that he says that he can't repress the feeling of panic when he can't breath, and being master meditator doesn't help in that regard. I remember dying of suffocation, if one stays aware during the breath arrest comes a point where the panic turns into bliss when you realize that the suffering of suffocation was self created and you're now effectively free of the breath you go into the deepest meditative state without psychedelics.

Also, don't forget to take good care of yourself and start treating yourself. Show yourself plenty of love & start celebrating life. Prepare yourself some tea, make some healthy cream soup, avocado toast, smoothie, fruit salad, something you like which makes you feel nourished & cozy. Enjoy it slowly while you listen to some good music and savour it slowly. Create a sacred space at home. It can be a whole room or just a corner, a peaceful area in the garden or even your balcony. Decorate it with lots of beautiful plants, natural minerals, crystals, floral arrangements, huge cushions, get a comfortable sofa, a cozy lounge chair etc Get yourself some hi-fi audio system and play some good music when you wake up in the morning. I suggest making an account on Spotify and creating themed playlists. For example, you can create one called 'Morning playlist' and take some time in the morning just to chill out, enjoy & savour life. Keep in mind that what you do in the morning can set the tone for the entire day. Do some active meditation, dance, sing, do some karaoke, do some yoga, breathwork, journaling, audio-journaling, paint some visionary art etc Enjoy yourself Do what gives you a feeling of expansiveness & joy. God's love can express itself in many ways. Just follow your bliss. In a holistic way. Take care, Best wishes ❤

God's love is so perfect, it's perpetually overflowing from a place of wholeness because God is already complete, totally at Peace within itself. Thus God's love is Infinite & Unconditional. It doesn't need a reason. It doesn't love something and hate other things. It understands itself fully and thus it has no shadow. It's all 'light'. It's all good. You cannot feel it because you are focusing your attention on the illusory game of the ego-mind that you're playing. Consciousness doesn't lack anything, thus it has no needs & no worries. It's infinite, immortal & all powerful. This love is not an expression of romantic desire or eros and it doesn't require a catalyst, an agent to provoke feelings & it's not just an emmotional connection to someone but it can express itself in any way it wants. This love is not an emotion, it is the source of emotions. Since God is unlimited, it can express the Love as an infinite range of emotions, feeling & states of consciousness as well. It can will any emotion or feeling into existence. Think about the types of love you feel right now. What do you love right now? Do you feel it directed towards certain people in your life? Is it romantic love, familiar love, self love? Is it appreciation for the fact that you are healthy, you are safe & you have water to drink? Your human mind is filtering the Absolute based on your human game of thinking you are a human. Do you ever feel your heart space overflowing with love? That's like a grain of sand compared to the boundless ocean of God's ecstasy ready for You to bathe in. God is forever home and that home is pure love. When you awaken to it, when you get the God-realization there will be no room for doubs as to whether or not consciousness and love are one and the same. Your 'I' will melt into the Ocean of God. God is total and complete, it gives love without any expectations of reciprocating or receiving affection or anything in return. Because it is itself. You are pure utter bliss, orgasmic oneness. Like a pounding heart made of divine orgasmic energy making love to itself for eternity. Infinite love ❤

"A Miracle of Love Like a river Flowing to the sea Like a wind Dancing in the trees Like a flower Opening to the sun All returns to the one Who has loved you Forever Forever No beginning no end This precious life Is a miracle of love All is love Everlasting love A miracle of love In a moment of bliss In a moment like this A miracle of love Of love ohhhhhhhohhh A miracle of love Love love love love Love is all All is love"

One that occurred to me recently while thinking about the recent suicide: Leo gives you the impression that death = infinite unconditional love-bliss, complete understanding, total onenss and all the other facets of enlightenment. Though he clearly and overtly discourages his viewers from doing any physical harm to themselves, some will inevitably jump to that conclusion, thinking themselves to be so fed up with life, or such a spiritual badass that they can take a short cut and jump straight to enlightenment by suicide. The bias of course being that Leo and everyone else alive reading this are alive. Whatever levels of consciousness are reached, that consciousnes also resides in a living human body looking through physical eyes. What if maybe, possibly, perhaps, "enlightenment" as anyone can conceive of it from the human perspective, is only possible for incarnated beings. What if those who have died before reaching that level of consciousness in their lifetime do not become instantly "enlightened" upon death, and instead, will return in physical form for as many lifetimes as it takes before that self-realization unfolds while alive? I can't claim to know, point is that having mystical experiences of any sort, while giving you sharable insights into reality, doesn't necessarily mean you know what would happen (in the proximate sense) after anyone else becomes physically dead for real, permanently.

A permanent collapse of the I-thought, or put another way, the breakdown of the mental mechanisms that has you identify with concepts of the self, is enlightenment in its most common form. There are many more stages after that. But this is already very good and valuable. Yes it is not the same thing, though a complete crown chakra opening is necessary for unity consciousness, which is several degrees above basic self-realization. However, since you already seem somewhat attuned to chakras, even basic self-realization is likely to be accompanied with at least partial opening of the crown chakra, which will result in bliss and love, and will also show you how to advance further. I do, yes, but at the end of the day, it really is not possible to give any practical advice about the how of it in textual form.

The pleasure of blissful self-realization will supersede all worldly-pleasures initially, so you don't even have the motivation to chase after something else. Eventually, as the bliss stabilizes, you are free to do as you want. Still, excessively chasing worldly pleasures becomes rather moot, since everything is already blissful and you won't have to look anywhere to find it. This bliss results in happiness in the mind as well. Happiness is a state of the mind and can never be permanent. Bliss is not the same thing as happiness, though it can cause it. Still, with self-realization, being happy and not in pain stops being the objectives of life.

Its a technique called mahamudra .it gives me enough bliss and remove all my suffering and quitens monkey mind significantly

@asifarahim I was just asking what you were doing as your single technique that generated bliss. I might look into official kriya yoga in the future but right now i'm doing my own thing

Don't be so hard on the poor guy, it's his ignorance that created his bliss. Better to ask him for open-mindedness!

Hi everyone. I been having some experiences lately that I hope some of you could help me shed some light on to what’s going on. - So this got a lot longer than I anticipated. But that’s how it goes I guess. So If you have the patience to read throughout it. Thank you. Theres is a long backstory like always :). But to cut it short, it has involved a classic massive existential crises from losing “everything” and a complete chattering of my identity. Leading both to immense beauty and despair. Witch at fist led me back into an old lover; Philosophy, to try and find answers, witch I felt in the end let me to the limits of philosophy/logic. A deep dive into psychoanalysis and philosophy kind of stranded, exemplified for me by this notion by Hegel: “The thought of contradiction is the essential moment of the concept” and Lacan´s “I think where I am not, therefore I am where I do not think.”. At this point I started feeling kind of like a recovering "intellectual". Suddenly it made sense to me when OSHO say: “Baybe!.. My whole job is to confuse you”. But to cut to the chase, I then did the online inner engineering course by Sadhguru some time ago (Not the initiation into shambhavi mahamudra). And I been practicing the Isha Kriya + 7xA 7xU 7xM + 21xAUM meditation every morning and then just the Kriya again in the evening. I didn’t really have any expectations about it to be honest. Just taking it like an experiment to see if anything would happen. I did it in kind of the same spirit as brushing my teeth I guess. From what I have read its supposed to be a very sudle and gentle process. And I have also seen it referred to as a watered-down version of Kriya yoga here on the forum. And I have heard Sadhguru say that its a safe practise where nothing crazy will happen to you. So 21 days into the 48 day madela, I had the fist experience, where for just a few seconds, a taste of bliss rolled trough me. It was fine, pleasant and quite sudle. Then for the next days things stated moving around between my dick and my anus during the two practices. It feels like tingeling + something moving around. Like a fetus moving around in an egg, the area being the egg. Around the same time, not during meditation, I had an experience where everything suddenly went silent. My existential crisis and loss of identity has led me into a purpose search spiral, (that I have noticed im not the only one getting caught in this confusion). For a long long time I had the feeling that this is the thing im gonna do/be, but then it collapsed. Like this is not it, again ´this is it-this is not it´,´this is it - this is not it´on and on to the point where it was driving me so crazy that I started thinking if no matter what I come up with is not “IT” any longer, then maybe really all of it is it.. Ore it and neither it at the same time, so to say. Like the purpose is not having to ask the question in the first place, but again it has to go full circle, back to where it started. Anyways, what triggered this experience of silence/emptiness was, -in my trying to understand- listening to different talks on non-doership. And in one talk, one woman from the audience told a story of a mosquito landing on her shoulder and her hand just smacking it by itself. Somehow that simple story just made everything go completely silent. For the first few days I feel like having no thoughts. Thoughts suddenly felt just like a toolbox I could pull out if I wanted to ore just leave it in the closet otherwise. My irritation towards others opinions completely disappeared. that witch would previously get me annoyed didn't bother me the slightest anymore. I noticed some reactions happening automatically in the body like it was just a learned pattern that was just happening by itself. But It was just the body doing its thing. And at the same time I also started being unsure of my exact location. Having trying to located where I am before I have had the experience of being kind of more in my visual filed the behind my eyes. But now it has gotten intensified. I started doubting if I was going mad. I had a family weekend that I was getting uncertain if I could handle. Like if I could act sane if that makes sense.. But in the end it went fine. I had just before that cut down on the practise and just stuck to the kriya not to ruin the madela. Morning and evening and skipping the AUM. But now to the reason for my post. This morning doing the kriya ( I started adding the AUM back again yesterday as I now felt integrated with the experiences ). But after the “Im not the body, Im not even the mind” During the 7xAaaaa it got intense. A bit of tingeling like before between the A & D and then suddenly my body just started lifting up from my seat and down into the seat in a rhythm of woooom… woooom …woooom bouncing up and down, up and down. I have never had any experience like this. I know there was no physical movement happening. But it was as real as real. I stuck trough the kriya, kind of hoping I would not blow up, and I did not. But it was a wild experience. I have a job for the fist time In a long time in a week that I have to be functional at and my feeling is I can’t go further right now into the experience. Im already balancing my sanity at this point I feel. As I have understod it these exercises is ment to ground you in your root/muladhara. But my experience is that they make me take off. And it feels like a bigger engine in warming up to shoot me somewhere I have no idea where is. So today after this experience my feeling is that I should take my foot of the pedal. Even thou I haven’t even completed the 48 day madela of something that is just supposed to ground me!. I do have some on of experience with labelling meditation and do-nothing. So im aware of the the state where, even just a small gap between mind/body and awareness, the process is on for me. But this thing seams to go waaaay beyond that. This process is on a whole other level from my experience so far. There are some energies at play that I have no idea of yet. And I have a lot of respect for that I guess. Ill admit that I am on the cautious side with these things. I like to keep up with the process to some extend I guess. Im not especially kind to my body to be honest. I do eat very healthy naturally, but other than that not much in that direction. I do have a feeling that at this point maybe I have to shift somehow into taking more care of my body before continuing the process. Am I being over sensitive about the whole thing? I do have a feeling that things are gonna go really fast if I continue. In some sense I feel like its already on, and its just a question on how fast in some way. To context a bit more, I can add that im also sensitive to pshycadellics. I have taken 1/4 of what others have taken, with them feeling nothing at all, and I get blow away. But for alcohol its the opposite. I can drink as much as i can stand and it never changes my personality at all. It never has as long as I can remember, not even the slightest. In contrary to what I notice in others. My experiential field changes but I dont if that makes sense. Also I should maybe say that for the last year I have been taking the opportunity of Corona to just spending time alone. So I have been alone close to 99% of the time for more than a year. To the point of hearing my own voice is a funny experience. My post I basically just about the bouncing wooom wooom wooom experience. The rest is just more ore less relevant context that I could come up with. I haven’t been able to find any similar experiences described. The tingle and the moving around down there, I have seen described as Kundalini. But the bouncing? I have heard yoga masters say that it is extremely rare to get an accidental kundalini awakening. Though YouTube is full of people saying exactly that’s what happened to them. Am I messing with kundalini unintentionally here? I do not feel comfortable fooling around with that energy without anyone to guide me to be honest. But maybe it has nothing to do with that and im just being a spiritual baby ? ? And its just a .. well I dont know what is is.

God is infinity, which means infinite suffering and bliss all at once. Infinity implies all state possible, and infinite situations and problems to solve/overcome. That implies that no matter how much we solve "problems" and reduce suffering in the world, there will always be more coming. That sounds nihilist and "bad", but actually, it would be sucks if it wasn't the case. Think about it for a full minute (not asking much of you ), if you have peace in the world, with zero situations to solve, that's the same as imagining a world with no experiences, cause as soon as an other is created, there will be conflict in one form or another. That applies to the individual as much as the collective, with no situations to deal with, with nothing to strive for, there is no point in having a temporal life's experience, time would be useless. There will always be suffering as well as new challenges to tackle, so when Leo says Spiritual teachers are cosplaying, that's quite true, they don't actually believe peace and harmony can be reached (or it's wishful thinking), because it won't. I'm not saying that we can't go through stage green and live in harmony as a human race, I'm saying that even if that is done, new challenges will arise out of that, It will never stop. Seeking the end of suffering, in the end, is kind of pointless and aimless, cause not only it is not possible, but it's not truly what you want. Think again for another minute, if we truly wanted a life without struggles, why the fuck would we incarnate ourselves as human beings in the first place ? That's what we wanted, or at least, that's what's happening and can't be avoided. So what can we take out of that ? We have to live life not to stop suffering, but to enjoy everything, even the struggles and the hardships, cause that's literally the only thing we can and will ever do. We will never reach a state of eternal peace for long, cause even if we do, we'll come back one way or another as a human with "problems" (or other experiences) to start the cycle of suffering and bliss all over again. We're not here to escape pain and suffering, we're here to experience it, to be able to contrast it with bliss and ecstasy, and then transcend them altogether, and forgot all about it. Life is just an orgie of experiences that never stop in peace or suffering, but loves to mix both, because every one of those experiences are unique and will never happen again, which is why they are so beautiful and amazing. Even the "worst" moment of your life Was a masterpiece.

People do physically die from lack of relationship. Think of a baby who isnt given love, or an older person who lost their partner. No, the opinion is that because we are social beings, we need relationships to survive. Survival isn't just about life and death. Even someone who lives alone and never sees anyone ever, at one point they survived because of relationships. Also, you don't know that they experience "absolute bliss" all the time. They had to probably go through a lot of loneliness and still feel that way at times. You've taken extreme examples of humans that CAN survive without other humans and using that as a reason why relationships are not a must. Also, I'm not just talking about romantic or even close friendships...there are many different types and any kind of social interaction with another human is considered a relationship of some sort.

So your opinion is that because we live in a relative world, interpersonal relationships are a must? That would also mean that without them you would physically die or not be satisfied throughout your life. Why are there so many examples of the opposite in this case? And why are there examples of enlightened masters who live in a cave and experience absolute bliss? Do you feel empty and lonely without people around you? Again, my desire is not that I want to live in a cave or whatever alone till I die. It is about the answer of the question.

@Zeroguy Well that doesn't really answer anything tbh. It doesn't tell me how to change the dream, or how to imagine specific things. Like how do I imagine my crown chakra opened and bliss? Saying I imagine the crown chakra and I am imagining bliss doesn't really do anything

I've had thoughts similar to Sunny. Logically it follows. If this is just a dream and the truth is that reality is all good and we simply creating reality for our own experience then why not just die and create a new dream rather than wait 50 years etc because you will die eventually. Most people will live their entire lives without experiencing love, deep joy bliss etc, but when they die they will get all that and more. From their perspective what is the point of living and not just killing themselves? But at the same time, the guy left his 2 kids to grow up without a father. And if you read his posts there's a sense that he is parroting some spiritual tropes without an understanding of how they fit into reality at large.

@LastThursday thank you for the story, though I feel that you have been trying to get out of that well for a very long time now. And I have to ask myself if you actually know and know how to get enlightened. Though the how to is not easy to explain, once you have entered into it and that way of living once, twice or thrice, you have faith you can again. Actually I have removed so much of any identity that it is difficult not to become "enlightened". It's interesting because a year ago I started to understand within me which way I would have to live to be enlightened, the day sadhguru said enlightenment is the eisiest thing, instant realisation. Though at that time without being aware of it I had a lot of ego/emotions etc that had to be cleansed from my system, so for a moment I thought enlightenment way that endless bliss that I could feel for multiple hours, it was intense meditation and at that tome it was complete freedom aka short period of enlightenment. Then afterwards I understood living outside the well was no longer filled with bliss because that was just piled up emotions/desires that had to go through for me to get to the next phase. Staying in the system of society I gradually lost more and more of my identity and everything became clearer and clearer though I always knew since 12 months ago how to become enlightened. It's just something you have to do and there is no method for it. That's why I called what you are doing playing mind games. Because It actually in a sense won't get you closer to the way of an enlightened. Either you live completely freely or you play mind games with yourself, there is no inbetween. That's why I also wrote that I am doing the same. When the mind games start to get less and less what will be left will be more and more of the truth. When you are only left with the truth of your desires and wants and identity and the rest of it then you will naturally come to the place where I am right now. In almost constant touch with a new way of living, then it is easy, just to fly out of the well you thought you were stuck in, because actually you just didn't know how to fly, you were scared to fly, but now you know that all I have to do is jump with all my might and I'll be flying, so why stop when you have started, then continue to fly forever untill the day you wish for peace and thereby return to the earth.