Arthogaan

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  1. God is busy figuring out how to dreaming the Holocaust and you are sitting here whining.
    I honestly cannot wrap my head around why this universe exists
    @Shodburrito You are looking at all this very selfishly. Your human concerns are irrelevant to God.
    God is an Infinite Consciousness. It's only concern is to dream, not your petty personal problems.
    God is busy figuring out how to dreaming the Holocaust and you are sitting here whining.

  2. Michals technique with psychedelics
    About the last Insight post and general critique of Leo
    Wait till you realize there are ways to input anything into the imagination you explore in higher states and then when you get down to a normal state of consciousness it will still affect your life. 
    Imagination consciousness gains are like magickal sprinkles that you can spend on your desire when you learn how to shape it :)))))
    I do not know whether the method I use to do that would work for many people though. 
    a) lower the amount of thoughts massively you have via Shamatha meditation
    b) [thought about the way you want to manipulate reality] * 1000 000 = cloud your mind (won´t tell you how, it is related to affirmations though) 
    Combine with intent (learn what is intent via using magick to become better at magick)
    = replace all the space you freed via concentration by new ways to shape reality
    This will make you extremely tired.
    c) raise consciousness via psychedelic = clear your mind & charge the thought mush you created
    The thoughts will get fueled, fullfiled and energized
    d) continue with b) -> THIS WILL KILL THE WHOLE TRIP in a matter of minutes
    e) redose / repeat again as many times as possible
    f) week without magick -> the effects in reality will be many, many times stronger than with any magickal working you have done before 
    Being able to do a) & b) is why it wont work for most of you ;-)
    [FULL, UGLY, NORMAL MIND] -> [EMPTY, ZEN MIND] -> [THOUGHTS ABOUT _ * 1000 000] -> PSYCHEDELIC -> [THOUGHTS ABOUT _ * 1000 000] * INFINITE IMAGINATION -> [NORMAL SOBER MIND, changed by what just happened] -> REPEAT
    This is not a theory, I am just describing accurately my new experiences.

  3. Turning pain into chocolate
    About the last Insight post and general critique of Leo
    I experience a curious aspect within these highly liquid realms: a curiosity of creation. With an underlying awareness of construct awareness, there can be a sense of being the creator of the dragons. Perhaps akin to the "Magician" level within Cook-Greuter's "Construct-Aware" stage. There is a sense of "me" creating, yet if that "me" tries to take more control, the creation is usually lost. I've discovered a few dynamics at play:
    1) Complete dissolving of self and emergence of Creation that is appearing.
    2) A sense of "Co-creation" in which there is a sense of self, yet also a Higher Self. This would be similar to a lucid dream in which the self realizes it's dreaming and begins co-creating with a Higher Dreamer. Yet there is a very fine balance. If the self tries to take too much control, the Co-creation is lost. 
    3) A sense of full control over the dream. As an example, one time I was doing Yin Yoga (long hold stretches) and went into the "Co-creation" realm. I noticed that I could start transforming the pain of the stretch into different forms. At first, the "I" surrendered into what was transforming and allowed it to happen. Yet the "I" gained the ability of limited control - as if it was a magic wand. Yet it wasn't something I could intentionally do, it was more of a gift / grace / higher wisdom. I then had full control and able to do whatever I wanted with the pain sensations. I transformed them into the texture and taste of chocolate. I transformed them to flairs emanating from my joints. I could make them chilly snowflakes or a warm whirlpool. . . When I eventually snapped out of it, I realized I held that posture for about an hour and went way too far. I was in severe pain and I must have strained tendons / ligaments / muscles - I was in pain for about a week. . . I'm convinced that I could have been naked under a pile of snow and felt no discomfort as I was creating. In this case, the saying "Don't forget the body" rings true.

  4. Higher consciousness is liquid. Seeing dragons.
    About the last Insight post and general critique of Leo
    The higher degree of consciousness you reach, the more physical reality will melt before your eyes into a liquid mindscape.
    Higher consciousness is liquid, lower consciousness is solid.
    If you become conscious enough, your couch can literally melt into a talking dragon. This is a good example of what I mean by "higher consciousness".
    You ain't really conscious until you start seeing dragons.
    One time I became so conscious I started seeing dragons and demons crawling between the gaps in empty space. That's when things get interesting. That's when you really start to understand CONSCIOUSNESS.

  5. Your couch is imaginary
    About the last Insight post and general critique of Leo
    @Breakingthewall Imaginary doesn't mean unreal, imaginary = reality.
    Your hands are imaginary. You are dreaming them. And that is reality. A mind is imagining a world around itself.
    Physical objects are just a denser kind of imagination than the images in your head. Don't forget, the images in your head are real. So don't hold imagination as something unreal. Imagination is real. The way a human imagines a picture in his mind is directly analogous to how God imagines the physical walls of your house.
    This is what is being pointed to. Practically what this means is that if you become conscious enough your couch can turn into a dragon. Because the couch was always imaginary. Very few humans understand that this is possible. Even "enlightened" people may not understand this point. So the question is, do you understand that your couch is imaginary?

  6. Ideas can help you with God
    About the last Insight post and general critique of Leo
    God is not merely a thing you learn. God is the dream itself.
    You cannot treat God as just one more piece of content within consciousness. God is consciousness itself.
    Of course your ideas about God are content within consciousness. But even so, those ideas can still be valid and useful so there's nothing technically wrong with that. As long as you don't lose track of God itself. Ideas can either help you keep track of God or lose track of God. So not all ideas are equal in that regard.

  7. Doubting god realization is falsehood
    About the last Insight post and general critique of Leo
    @zurew The mistake in all your logic is that God-Realization is completely unlike all other epistemic claims, beliefs, or worldviews. You are assuming that you can translate epistemic lessons from the relative domain into the absolute domain, which is wrong.
    It is NOT a mistake that we cannot prove God to you beyond all your doubts. That's the fundamental issue here. Since you are God dreaming that you're human, you will invent all sorts of doubts and rationalizations for why no one should ever claim that they know for sure that God exists. This is the game you're playing. God is an Infinite Self-Deception. Your particular deception is to be lost in skepticism and uncertainly, forever waffling and doubting yourself.
    Open your mind to the possibility that uncertainty, doubt, and epistemic humility become a mistake when it comes to God-Realization. You think you are preserving integrity and truth by being uncertain, but consider, what if that's actually the source of falsehood?
    The funny thing about your position is that even if God himself appeared before you, you would tell him, "But how can you be sure you're God? What if you're just an arrogant, deluded, narcissistic madman?" To which the only response God could give is to sigh. You see? God himself cannot help you at that point.
    What you really want to achieve here is to make God uncertain about itself, to confuse God into falling back asleep, to match your own level of asleepness. But of course God is not gonna do that. And when he doesn't, you get pissy about it and you invent rationalizations for why God is wrong and you are right.
    THAT'S the game being played here. You need to muster enough intelligence to see it and cut through it. That's what is required for God-Realization to occur. Otherwise you stay asleep.
    You are underestimating how tricky this God-Realization thing is. You think you're outsmarting God but God is outsmarting you. You should notice that the biggest mistake all scientists make is that they act too cautious out of fear of falling into falsehood, and ironically this becomes the very thing that lands them into falsehood. There is a time to be uncertain and there is a time to be certain. Facing the Absolute is not the time for uncertainty.

  8. Balls to see you are the Mind
    About the last Insight post and general critique of Leo
    No. That's not what is happening when we speak of Awakening or God.
    It's like you're being deliberately dense.
    A fundamentalist is not raising his consciousness, he is just parroting dogma.
    There is no possibility of Awakening being wrong.
    How many years will it take you to understand that? If it could be wrong it wouldn't be worth anything and we wouldn't be talking about it.
    The problem is that you are trying to maintain modesty and hedge your bets. You cannot do that when it comes to discovery of Absolute Truth. You are too meek to actually put your balls on the chopping block. You don't have the balls to recognize your own sovereignty as a MIND. And that's why you cannot see God. You will see God when you finally realize that your MIND is Sovereign. And not before.

  9. Nature of trippin on high doses - Foresluv
    Emergency with 150mcg 1V-LSD
    This thread has stimulated my mind. Below I share some ideas, based on experience. The ideas are both true and false, depending on the perceptive lens of the mind. 
    One mindspace dynamic is the mind trying to control the mental narrative. . .  Struggling for control during a trip and trying to regain control after a trip. . . Such as trying to control the narrative of what an experience ‘means’ in logical, reasonable sense-making. This can help with grounding the mind-body and lead to the creation of many constructs - often quite insightful.  Yet it is also a contracted mindstate and limits mind fluidity, exploration and being construct-aware. 
    There are many rational / logical realms that are amazing. There is infinite exploration within those realms - yet they can also have “guardrails” inhibiting broader exploration - especially for minds that like control of creating intellectual, logical constructs of reality. Venturing to the edge can be a “stretch zone” , venturing beyond it can be a “panic zone”. Ime, the key to breaking through barriers is surrender - both during and after a trip. 
    My first trip was solo with 5-aco-dmt. I wanted to do a light trip of 10mg, yet made a dosage error and took a mega 10X dose of 100mg. It went so far that that the  “I” that controls logical sense-making of what “real” is never came back. From a personal perspective, its had both pros and cons - the mind can have an extraordinary ability to be fluid, imaginative, transcendently aware and to constuct-deconstruct. There exists a fluid “co-creation” with self and Self. Yet it can also be very difficult to communicate and relate to most people. Its also allowed amazing connections with a few people. 
    From a human perspective, highly intense trips can open breakthroughs, yet are more difficult to integrate and embody. They have the potential for unimaginable insight, expansion and neural plasticity- yet can also be very strenuous on the physical mind and body - in particular, the nervous system. Similar to exercise. . . Moderate exercise and occasional intense exercise is healthy stress on the body - yet too much intense exercise can cause injury and takes a toll on the body.
    These days, my mind is so fluid that it can venture “way out there” on its own, with shamanic  breathing or a light-moderate psychedelic dose. Yet at times, I still need to remind myself “Don’t forget the body” when venturing beyond. 
    Regarding trip sitting: Imo, if the biggest worry for two novices is how to stay calm and kill a trip if intense terror arises - they should drastically reduce the dosage. In many cases, novices should be cautious when wielding magic wands that have extraordinary power.

  10. real love - like million sugar
    How do you compare taking LSD to Mushrooms?
    No, the comprehension was purely abstract. It wasn't like a visual nightmare. But that pure abstraction of LOVE will be enough to horrify you all the same because in one fell swoop you comprehend it's cosmic ramifications.
    Imagine if you could take pure sugar and concentrated it a billion fold. So that 1 tablespoon = 1 billion spoons of sugar. And then you put that in your mouth. It would be so sweet it literally burns your tongue and make you gag. That's how pure LOVE works. If you became conscious of that much LOVE in one moment your whole human being would burn alive in it until it melted your body and mind into a uniform soup.

  11. Why both rich and poor do not awaken
    Do wealthy intelligent people pursue awakening more?
    Very successful people like celebrities and CEOs are insanely ambitious workaholics, so by the time they acheive their success they are usually so wrapped up and addicted to it that they have no time for serious spiritual work. They have chosen success over God. Elon Musk is the perfect example. He will never awaken because he's too busy working. Of course there are exceptions, but it's rare.
    But on the other hand, poor people are usually struggling so much just to survive and pay their bills that they also have no time for serious spiritual work.
    This explains why so few ever realized God. Ta-daaa!
    In general, having wealth gives you more freedom to take time off from work. This is a huge advantage. However, you have to actually dare to exercise it in the right way, which most wealthy people never do. Wealth, fame, power, and sex are very addictive and corrupting. Most people in life are chasing after wealth, fame, power, sex, or love. Or they are barely able to feed themselves. And so they never realize God.

  12. Leo about true christianity
    Someone please talk Christianity out of me.
    You have been taught a very poor, shallow version of Christianity. If you actually make an effort to study serious mystical esoteric Christianity you will realize that Christianity means You are God.
    It's that simple.
    But the Christianity you were taught was just dogma and nonsense spoken by people who never actually had direct experience of God. They didn't know what they were teaching.
    As Jesus told you, the kindgom of heaven is within. What that means is is that you are God, if you go deep within.
    You need to question and desconstruct every ideas humans told you about God and spirituality. Question everything until you discard all ideas. Then you will be left with raw direct experience or pure consciousness. That's the real God. CONSCIOUSNESS IS GOD. And all ideas about it are irrelevant.

  13. Self Worth, Heartbreak
    Leo, How to develop detachment to save oneself from heartbreak ?
    It basically is the problem of Self-Worth.
    You are making your Self-Worth dependent on external phenomena such as what people close to you will do to you or say about you.

    If you learn total Self-Love and you will see what a divine being you are you will be invincible.

    Your girlfriend cheating on you, your parents calling you a shame, NONE OF IT CHANGES HOW PERFECT AND DIVINE YOU ARE. 

    And the more you meditate, transcend and realize who you really are, the more you develop yourself, the more obvious it will become to you.

  14. Nothing about god can be bad
    Solipsism wouldn't be so bad
    What happens with the solipsism thing is that you spend a lot of time in denial about it. Then you feel depressed and bothered by it. And then eventually you become so conscious you stop even thinking about it and just enjoy being conscious. Ruminating about the downsides of solipsism is a kind of delusion which you must transcend.
    Nothing about GOD can be bad. That's AWAKENING.

  15. Dream analogy
    Wrong Insight: 'Nothing exists outside of MY mind' - Leo's Greatest Pitfall
    Okay, I think this is the source of all misconception in Solipsism vs Emptiness debate.

    I will try to slowly explain it from my current understanding.

    Let's imagine Lucy has a dream at night. In that dream Lucy dreams that she is Mary. Mary inside the dream is a hardcore materialist and therefore she believes that both external world and her own (dreamed) mind is made of matter.

    Next night Lucy dreams that she is Jack. Jack is a hardcore solipsist in lower case meaning of solipsism. Jack believes everything is his own small mind.

    Next night Lucy dreams that she is Arthur. Arthur is a hardcore buddhist and he believes that both matter and his own mind is made of Emptyness.

    The last night Lucy dreams that she is Leo, and Leo is hardcore psychedelic psychonaut, he takes 5-meo which makes him realize that ACTUALLY HE IS LUCY, THAT IT IS ALL A DREAM. THAT EVERYTHING IS LUCY'S OWN MIND. Not a mind of Leo, but a mind of Lucy. Leo realizes that he is Lucy and of course in this analogy Lucy is God. The Mind that dreams it all.
     
    Even emptyness and non existence happens inside of Mind of God. Just like dreamless sleep where no world is generated is still inside the mind, because there is all there is.

    I think @ardacigin you could argue from your model that in the state of sleepless dream there is no mind and all that is left is Empty Ultimate Reality, because the mind is gone (because it is turned off).

    I trully believe that we are trying to point to the same insight, but people from buddhist backround have a bias against using the word mind.
    To me personally Mind seems like the best word, because it points to the fact that this Ultimate Reality that everything is generated from is SO CLOSE, SO RIGHT HERE, SO INTIMATELY NOW. God's Mind is ultimate reality. And you are God.

    @Leo Gura @Inliytened1 @Sincerity @Breakingthewall Please give me your comments about dream analogy used here.

  16. Solipsism awake
    Wrong Insight: 'Nothing exists outside of MY mind' - Leo's Greatest Pitfall
    I never made this assumption. Just like all humans I started my spiritual work with the exact opposite assumption.
    It took me 100s of profound and painful awakenings to finally rid myself of the assumption that stuff exists outside my mind.
    - - - - - -
    You are absolutely wrong.
    GOD IS ABSOLUTE SOLIPSISM.
    You are not AWAKE and you don't understand what AWAKENING really entails.
    There cannot be anything outside your own MIND. Because your MIND IS INFINITE.
    If anything existed outside your own MIND then GOD would not be omnipotent nor omniscient. As you soon as you imagine any sense of "other" you lose your omnipotence and omniscience. This is the very mechanism by which GOD becomes not-GOD.
    It is absolutely true that all humans are a dream. You don't like to accept that because you will feel lonely and very depressed. Therefore you refuse to surrender the imagining of other people and you blame and project onto me as misunderstanding spirituality, when of course the one who doesn't understand spirituality is you.
    You are a perfect case-study of how Buddhism and nonduality leads to self-deception and false spirituality. You have been trying too hard to be a good little Buddhist boy, but none of that will ever be enough to AWAKEN. You must destroy all of Buddhism and nonduality if you actually want to AWAKEN. Pretty obvious stuff.
    What you consider my greatest pitfall is just projection. It's your greatest pitfall.
    But you are making one even deeper projection. You are literally projecting my existence. In fact I do not exist outside your mind, and as soon as you stop imagining me I will cease to exist.
    I hope some day you open your mind deep enough to comprehend me.
    Much love.

  17. I hope for death, but I fear eternity
    I hope for death, but I fear eternity
    @Display_Name My only advice to you is to this:
    Become very serious about what kind of thoughts you allow your mind to entertain. Take responsibility over your own mind. Do not focus on things that disempower you. If you notice a certain line of thought is consistently disempowering for you, make a commitment to stop allowing that line of thinking into your mind ever again. Just drop it. Let it go. Practice letting go. Watch my video: The Power Of Letting Go.
    You are under no obligation to entertain every negative, depressing, disempowering, ugly thought that enters your mind.
    Focus your mind on how you can best honor the miracle that is your current life. And stop thinking about bullshit.
    Reality is your dream. So if you dream of horror and torture and shit, that's what your reality will slowly become. Until eventually you reach Hell. That's all Hell is.

  18. Too Much Freedom Isn't Always The Best
    Too Much Freedom Isn't Always The Best
    The point of freedom is to use it to allow yourself to commit to -- and pursue like a motherfucker -- your top values.
    Freedom is not for sitting around playing games and jerking off. Freedom is about being free to be highly creative in the way that is most meaningful to you.

  19. all is mind
    How do you know you are imagining everything?
    Reality is a Mind that dreams/imagines. When you say something is "real", what you mean is, it's imagined by you so deeply that you are not even aware of how it is imagined. And so you call that "real". Whereas if you become aware of how something is imagined, you call it unreal.
    You have to realize that this is all a trick of the mind. There is no ground for the distinction between real and imaginary. Because at root all there is, is Mind.
    The key is to drop the idea that there exists anything outside of imagination, by noticing that everything is Mind.
    How do you know? Consciousness. The only way anything is known. The only solution here is more consciousness, and no other way will work.

  20. There is no Ego there is only MIND
    Is ego a projection?
    That is a holdover from bad teachings I was infected with. In the future I will move away from speaking about ego at all.
    Nothing exists but MIND.

  21. There is no Ego only ideas in mind
    Is ego a projection?
    This whole notion of "having an ego" is just an imaginary construct. The sooner you drop the whole idea, the better.
    There really aren't any egos, just ideas in the Mind.

  22. The 5-MeO-DMT Mega-Thread
    The 5-MeO-DMT Mega-Thread
    It's not personal, but it's not mechanical either, and it's infinitely intimate. It's as intelligent as a motherfucker too. Hence it's called God. It really feels like experiencing God, not some dry mechanical void. It's full of life. It's full of love. It's organic-feeling. Like being inside a giant infinite mind. If you took the minds of every single genius human being who has ever lived in the last 5000 years and multiplied them all together and raised that by a power of a million, you would not even have 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000001% of its intelligence.
    It's intelligence is infinite.
    Divinity is the best word to describe it. Nothingness is literally divine. The very fabric of reality is self-seeing.

  23. Questions about DREAM, PERCEPTION, GODHEAD, SOLIPSISM, POV
    Questions about DREAM, PERCEPTION, GODHEAD, SOLIPSISM, POV
    Well, ultimately you have to discard this notion of "ego mind". It will hold you back.
    There really isn't an ego mind, there's just GOD/Consciousness/You -- right NOW.
    Ego mind is just some ideas and feelings within your present Consciousness. If you throw all that away you will be left with pure Consciousness.
    Ego mind is when you personalize your present experience too much. When you make it all human, biological, and personal. If you strip all the crap away then you're just left with pure reality.
    Just imagine that you're so present that you stop conjuring up anything beyond the present moment. No past, no future, no birth, no death, no memories, no ego, no other, no stories, no science, no spirituality. Just PURE NOW.

  24. Solipsism is scary! ??
    Solipsism is scary! ??
    I am tired of explaining this over and over again when it is so simple.
    GOD IS ABSOLUTE SOLIPSISM. There is nothing outside your Mind. Your Mind simply is the entirely of reality.
    REALITY IS YOUR MIND. Period.
    This is what is true in your experience. Everything else is games.
    Your job is to learn to LOVE the TRUTH. So stop playing games and just fall in love with truth.
    If you insist on playing games, you will suffer.
    Do not create a belief system out of this. Either you are directly conscious of it or you are not. If you are not, then stop torturing yourself with ideas of people being "unreal". Ideas and beliefs are not what is being pointed to. Your idea that others are "unreal" and that this is bad -- is also imaginary. That's not AWAKENING.
    If you're feeling bad about it, you didn't get it.
    EVERYTHING is imaginary. And that's the best way things could possibly be. So stop worrying about it. All your worry is pointless. Just trust that GOD is Perfect.

  25. 5 meo trip
    Awaken to Love - 5-MEO-DMT 40mg Fumarate Form Trip Report
    I've been following Leo's works for years and have done dozens of LSD trips. After having some profound mystical experiences here and there, I still feel like there is something more to discover. So, I finally got myself some 5-MEO-DMT. So far I've done total of 7 trips. The first three trips (10mg, 20mg, and 30mg) were complete failures though.  It's because I plugged way too deep into my butthole. I thought the deeper, the better, but clearly, I was wrong. After some research and trial and error, I learned to plugged only halfway and finally had some profound experiences on the next four trips (20mg, 30mg, 30mg, and 40mg). They all worked like a charm which was so epic that it blew my mind. However, the trip that I'll be mainly emphasis is my 7th trip at 40mg. Personally 40mg would be considered my breakthrough dosage, but keep in mind, everyone has a different tolerance level and generally I don't recommend people trying more than 30mg! And always start with low dose and slowly build it up. Anyway, without further ado, let's dig in.
    Substance: 5-Meo-DMT in Fumarate Salt Form
    Method: Plugging
    Dosage: 40mg
    Setting: My bedroom
    Time: 7:50 pm 3/24/2023
    Trip report:
      Yesterday, I finally had the courage to try 5-meo at 40mg. Since 30mg only produces moderate trip for me, my intuition told me I needed to go higher. So after plugging at around 7:50 pm. I calmly sat on my bed and waited for the effects to kick in.  After 7 or 8 minutes, the effects finally kicked in, and I started to have an uneasy feeling of nausea. I wanted to vomit, but as my consciousness arose in a speed of light, I became too conscious to even care to move and vomit. I just lay down on my bed from seating position and closed my eyes.
      As soon as I closed my eyes, time stopped. I suddenly became conscious that time does not exist. Time is just imagination in this present moment, and this moment is all there is. This moment last eternity. Time is just one of the many elements that make up our human life. There is never time; there is just now. However, this was just the beginning. As I watch my consciousness significantly increased, I became conscious that all my sensory fields are literally made of consciousness. I don't know how to put it into words. I just felt like all my sensory fields started to collapse and merge into each other in a spiral way, and this was a nonstop force that I, as ego, couldn't control, which finally started to made me afraid and worried. Combining with the uneasy nauseous sensation, in my first time during trip, I begged to stop. It just became unpleasant, but weirdly amazing at the same time. I wondered how this could all be possible and was surprised that I never had experienced anything like this during an LSD trip.
      The fear came. I wondered where all this would lead me. This is too much! Then I realized the only thing I can do here is to surrender. So what is actually the act of surrendering? The act of surrendering is just to face the fear, face = give attention to = aware of = conscious of. So I simply became conscious of my fear, the sensation of fear. Then I became conscious that fear itself is also part of consciousness. It's one little facet of consciousness! Everything is consciousness! The only reason I was afraid was that I didn't understand who I really am! I'm not this human self. I'm consciousness! Fear is there as a necessity for the existence of this ego to fool myself into thinking I'm an ego, and fool me thinking that there is really something to be afraid of so I could stay alive. If everything is consciousness, including fear, my sensation, my current room, my breath, my hands, my thoughts, tree, animal, people, drug, psychedelic, etc, then who am I really? I started to wonder.
      As I had this realization, my conscious and sensory fields were merging into each other more and more. It was like a never-ending spiral. It was quite amazing to watch all of this happening, and it felt like it would last for eternity. Finally, the spiral of consciousness consume every part of me, including the image of myself, my memory, my body, and, lastly, my fear. I gave up. I totally gave up. This is the most amazing and yet the most terrifying thing. I died, I literally died. I'm gone, but consciousness remains.......
      Then I realized what all of this collapsing of my ego, the dying process, is all about. This is the process of love. What is love? Love means I'm willing to fully experience suffering, experience fears because these are a part of my consciousness. The only thing that prevents me from realizing love is my fear and my escape and avoidance from fear. Love must be total! Love must be a totality! If you don't accept all the things in this world you hate, you cannot love! What every human being is most afraid of is suffering, fear, torture, and ultimately death! If you can't accept or love these things, you can't really love! By loving suffering, fear, and death, it literally means living through these moments, fully experiencing them until the point you realize you are them because you love them. Love is just the total embrace of everything that is in the consciousness, whatever that is good or bad to your human sense!
      And finally, this spirally emerging process completes. Everything has finally emerged into each other. And what remains is oneness. What remains is just this conscious field. I'm One!!!!!!!  if Me = One, then who am I? Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God! As I scream those words out loud! I'm God! I'm God! I'm God!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't believe it! I can't believe it! I screamed my lungs out in pure joy and happiness. And while I was realizing I'm God, my my consciousness started to spirally emerge again! However, this time, my consciousness field imagined orgasm, and the sensation of orgasm told me "I love you." Then my whole consciousness field is suddenly filled with orgasm and starts to merge into each other!
    It's literally like this picture below:

      Imagine each little black circle in this picture represents your most amazing orgasm during sex you ever had, and during this moment there are literally infinite numbers of orgasms merging spirally into one. It never stops! This is literally the best possible pleasure you would ever encounter! Infinite high! Infinite orgasm! Infinite love!
      Oh my God! This is infinite love! I'm infinite love! I screamed again. And THIS is my PEAK of realization, my peak of the trip, my peak of pleasure. And it lasts for eternity........ I became Love. I'm Love. Love is infinite orgasm........
     While it literally felt like eternity, and it IS. As my trip end, as my consciousness started to go back to my base line. I fell back into my ego self. Everything slowly returns to normal. However, it left me completely speechless. I'm happy like a child. And I cried. I was lying on my comfy bed for quite some time and just stared at my ceiling, thinking: I'm God. I'm Love. This is the surest thing I know. Not only do I understand I'm God, I become it. I am it. And God is Love.
      So these are all the things I can say about the trip I had yesterday. And now I realize how foolish I was. I had contemplated for years, listened to Leo's content for years, and did a lot of self-development work and did a dozens of LSD Trips. I thought I knew something, but in fact, I knew nothing. The only way to truly know something is by experiencing this crazy realization yourself and coming back. Then you might know a little better.
      Intuitively, I know that this realization of myself as oneness, as God, as love is not the complete God's realization. It's not even close! I have only touched the fingertip of God. This journey has just begun, and I'm optimistic about it all. Now I understand why Leo teaches what he teaches. Now I know why Leo needs to behave like a jerk sometimes on the forum to warn people that they are self-deceiving and foolish. Leo does it for truth. Leo does it for love.
      In short, There's more to become conscious of. The 5-MEO-DMT is truly the God molecule. And my journey toward true God-realization just begin. Thank you, Leo. Thank you for showing me 5-MEO-DMT and for your teachings. I literally listen to your episodes ever day. And they are the solid foundation for me becoming God yesterday. So it's not just the power of psychedelics that matters, but also what you do when you're not on them matters too.