Judy2

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  1. @Tudo Embrace the feeling of regret and allow yourself to grief for the experiences and the version of you that you couldn't have. Once you allow yourself to feel the pain fully, you'll find a spark of Love in all of it. Then you can try to let go of the idea that it should or could have gone any other way. Instead, consider that everything went exactly as it had to go. This is not a belief you adopt, but a felt sense, and in a way, faith and trust in the Universe. It might not be there all the time, but it can come and go, and eventually sink in as 'truth'. And notice that while the past is gone, there's still a future waiting for you. You can move past the feelings of regret and resentment and focus on how to create a positive future for yourself. I know it's hard cause sometimes it seems like past decisions have closed certain doors for us. Now you can either get stuck and focus on the closed doors in front of you, or turn left or right and find new ways. I'm sure it's still possible to change your focus within the field you're working in, or find an entirely new job that is more suitable to your needs and values. And you can leave past relationships behind and figure out how to make your future relationships more functional and fulfilling.
  2. @Federico del pueblo i agree with @OBEler that most of it is anti-drug propaganda. generally, we should have a lot of respect for these substances. bad things can and will happen when people use them carelessly. that being said, the mainstream perception of lsd is way out of proportion, with an excessive emphasis on the downsides. i guess the stories you're referring to may be true, but of course people focus on these stories alone and forget about the other 95% of trips that go fine and may actually help people. so to answer your question, drug-induced psychosis is a thing. and yes i know someone who jumped out of his window, at "only" 400ug (not to commit suicide, but because he was very euphoric and thought it was a good idea....and he didn't get hurt, but still, that's what people do). again, don't underestimate these substances. in my experience, the moment you get a little too reckless, they will find their way to show you that you have to respect them. and give you a 16h bad trip or make it so that someone has to arrest you or something;) if you take the necessary precautions you should be fine. be aware of the risks, monitor your emotions before you ingest a drug and use them in a safe environment. people do get crazy ideas on lsd, they do enter crazy intense emotional states...which is something we want, but we should maintain enough sanity to know not to act on certain impulses while high. impulse control is crucial here and i have the feeling that most people are not mature and responsible enough to reflect on the necessity of it.
  3. @Loba I guess "being authentic" is scary because i tend to demonise parts of myself that are not what i want them to be. Re-integrating these parts is probably the only path worth taking, but i'm scared and it can feel very ugly to me. I can't shake the feeling that there's something wrong with me, or inside me, that would be "lesser" than my personal ideals. This is probably what i'm resentful about because integrating these parts of myself feels so negative and ugly, like a betrayal to prettier ideals i have. Especially when i start comparing myself to others and then notice that i'm now "inferior" to them, or that their being a certain way may be perceived as cute or sweet. I could go more into detail here but for now i'll leave it at that. Generally, i understand the root problem, but can't seem to find a real solution that gets to the root of it. Your take on exploring energies was very interesting to read. I'll look for the book you linked and see what doors it may open for me:) The idea that it's all Me is not new, but at the same time a person has a specific identity that tends to favour one expression (e.g. masculine vs feminine) over the other. And i'm guessing this is a more nuanced cluster of energies than what most people would expect? It's not like there's only one string of energy...instead very different, often also opposing qualities are mingling....right? But then we still say that someone is, overall, more masculine or more feminine, or perhaps masculine/feminine in the sense that this is the dominant structure uniting all the sub-energies. I'm just guessing though and will try to investigate this a little more deeply. When you refer to the heart, is this the same as intuition? i think i sort of understand intuition, where thought-based insights tend to be out of context and accompanied by strong emotional reactions. For example when interpreting a dream, or even just an emotion, and having a spontaneous insight about what it meant that is not entirely congruent with the context of previous deductions about the matter. Typically, the body reacts in one way or another to make it clear that the insight is true, for example by crying. Or do you mean something different when you talk about the heart? Either way, this is another thing for me to deepen my understanding of and i'll have to learn more about how this expresses experientially.
  4. @Loba Thank you for taking the time! I think i understand what you mean by the breaking point where one goes full circle. I've experienced this 2 years ago, when i was very ill and brought up the courage to get better. A few days into the recovery process, i had my first awakening experience. So i do have a basic understanding of how Love can be found in the most painful and frightening experiences. At the same time, it's easy to forget and to doubt myself when time passes and things don't turn out so easy after all. And i'm generally very resentful about this entire process, because in my mind being "authentic" always has such a negative connotation. Perhaps i'm scared of myself or of who i could be if i stopped holding back or censoring my own self-expression. The thing about masculine vs feminine energy is still confusing to me. I've heard people ascribe these categories to inanimate forces or concepts (like darkness vs light, destruction vs creation, etc). More often than not, i would have matched them with the opposite polarity than they would "officially" be associated with. Do you know where i can find a reliable explanation on this, so that i can develop an intuition on how to properly categorise an object/an energy form as masculine vs feminine? Also, i don't quite understand the process of looking within yourself and identifying different energies. I guess if i were to look within myself, i would find something, but feel confused about it. Especially since the mind can capture both "external" and "internal" impressions, so are all of these energies "you"? Is this only based on what one identifies with ("i am x, i feel like x,...") and perceives as "internal", even though the thoughts are all the same in the end? For instance, if i were to think about a man or things associated with masculinity, that wouldn't make me a man just because it's on my mind. Whereas when i think about myself and my role as a woman, my desire to be a mother, etc. ...i think of it in terms of "i am...." and it's something i identify with. So i guess my question is, in the process you described, am i only looking at the "i am" energy forms, or at my mind in its entirety and its approach to thinking in general? Sorry if this sounds silly, i just don't know how else to explain this.
  5. @Loba hey, i'm curious about your perspective on the above. I've heard people talk about the importance of contrast before, but currently my perspective on this is rather pessimistic. Especially when it comes to the idea that in order to grow, we have to face so much pain and fear...and nowadays i only see the fear, and feel like i'm obligated to face it, but at the same time it completely erases the positive side of things. Like...why does "Love" have to be so hard and challenging? Too challenging, at times, so it almost breaks you. Sorry if this is too much, i just thought i'd ask cause you seem to have an understanding of this. And would you mind elaborating on the last part? Why do you perceive the duality of masculine vs feminine as more fundamental than any other duality?
  6. @flowboy @Michael569 Alright, thank you!
  7. @flowboy Do you know any good alternatives to ibuprofen and paracetamol?
  8. @KH2 i just thought of something else worth adding here. The "healthiest perspective" will vary from person to person, depending on where they're at in their lives. So even if someone does not grasp the entire truth of a situation, their beliefs may be very functional and "healthy" for where they are at.
  9. and i guess in this case it could be helpful to embed the opposing perspectives within a larger meta-perspective that unites them, such that no single party feels excluded or threatened.
  10. I think Leo has discussed this before, maybe when talking about Spiral Dynamics Stage Yellow, or in his series on wisdom. Being "impartial" or "balanced" does not necessarily mean that you'd always take the middle of all perspectives or options that are available. You can be very clear about the conclusions you arrive at, and they can be on one side of the spectrum. The important part is that your conclusions are based on a nuanced and holistic understanding of reality (or the given sub-system). Really, considering the entirety of an issue is what allows for a healthy perspective, and blindly taking the middle of all options available is not necessarily the best way to find this perspective. Instead, you'd have to analyse and understand the asymmetrical and counterintuitive mechanisms of the system:)
  11. "Enlightened people" are Life, and there's nothing else to do but to be Just be the Inevitable, and let the body do what the body's doing, let the thoughts think what they're thinking. "What now?" is just one more thought that is.
  12. @integral i think it's fine... why waste everyone's time with the same boring topics when you can have an interesting conversation instead? if you make depth a priority, people who value this will naturally be drawn towards you. and i guess when you're feeling insecure if it's too much, you can just check with them and ask.
  13. How about this?: Beauty = God recognising itself in something or someone