Codrina

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Posts posted by Codrina

  2. Posted

    My first one was on a mushroom trip some 11-12 years ago. I was looking at my hand and crying with great sorrow at the realisation that this 'Codrina' I thought I were, and imagined would remain after death of the body, was not there. 

    The last one, a few months back - most powerful one yet - when I realized, cooking one morning, that behind all eyes, through all experience, through all change, there is the never changing, forever still, perfectly peaceful 'I' 

     

     

  4. Posted

    First, you are not a victim of karma. You are it. And the character you experience is the creation. Rejoice in it.

    From my experience karma is memory, accumulation of information - the very creation - how do you create? By stacking bits together - in our case, nothing more than subtle concepts - what if there is one? And what if we add another one? What if we add another? And another? All the way to infinity and back - might wanna look into the 'flower of life' concept.

    There is no individual free will, as any apparent individual is but an accumulation of information within the same field - pay attention - decision always happens out of thought - thought comes after the decision making - it may take credit for it or acknowledge it - interesting studies have been done on the subject as well.

    In the last story I wrote I gently approach the subject of free will.

    https://treereality.com/higher-self/

    I strongly feel creation is all happening now, all possible variations, all karmas. There is purpose in everything. Even in asking oneself about karma.

    Look forward with curiosity 

    All the best

  5. Posted · Edited by Codrina

    @Scholar  Beautiful read.

    I'm a whole-food vegan myself. I gave up meat 11 years ago. And gave up milk and eggs 3 years ago.

    I took and take a lot of judgement from others because of it, but I didn't judge others for eating meat.

    Everyone is doing what they think it's best for them. Who am I to know what's best for them?

    I had a boyfriend at the time who wasn't vegetarian, and I used to cook meat for him.

    I actually ate meat a few times during these years, at family gatherings, out of respect, and sometimes at work, as I didn't want to give the chefs extra work just for me. I can't do it anymore, as I have noticed if I eat meat my mood changes. It veils awareness to a consistent degree.

    If you find yourself judging, accept your judgement, and with your innocent curiosity seek where it's coming from. Ask yourself "Why the judgement?" and listen. 

    All the best!

    Edited to add this:

    If you want to convince someone, just make them watch "Earthlings" - after I've seen this documentary I decided to give up meat and was buying my eggs and milk from the farmer's market - so I knew the animals were properly taken care of. 

     

  6. Posted

    @allislove Thank you. I am enjoying it. And I have seen my true nature. There is always peace and love in the background. Through tears of sorrow, through tears of joy. I love the rollercoaster of human emotion. I have created them so I can enjoy them. 

    I am still to experience this human life. It is a character I manifest, that writes, and a character to answer my question. 

    @roopepa I do realize nothing is real. I guess I'm still deciding where to take this character.

    @mandyjw Thank you. The experience is amazing. 

    @SoonHei Thank you. I will. I do love playing with words and concepts, however :D

        I find myself fascinated with the destruction within creation. 

       That's why I started this thread. I was looking for new perspectives on this.

     

       Hmmm... I guess what I already know is enough :) 

      Thank you all

     

     

  7. Posted

    Enlightenment is the recognition of your true nature. That is the easy part

    Enlightened people keep doing embodiment work.

    Some may choose to meditate, not as a practice born out of a desire to seek something, just out of joy, resting in being.

    All of them work to live the understanding through all experience.

    Embodiment is a lifelong journey.

    And the further you go in your work, the more magical experience becomes.

  8. Posted

    No words can describe the most radical truth. 

    Everything is. I am. And am not. I am here and there and nowhere. Now and never. And forever

    And there's nothing I can type to make you see, but if you look, just look, you'll see it. 

    Focus in silence, in seeing for long enough and you'll know.

    Look into your awareness. Look to the One you call 'I'.

    See it for what it really is - outside of any form (thought, perception, feeling), everpresent through all experience.

    It's what you've always been and forever will be. It's all there is

    This

    5 hours ago, Carl-Richard said:

    Truth is too simple for people to understand.

    This

    47 minutes ago, EternalDream said:

    And you don't need anything to percieve it (no body, no sensory organs)

    This

    5 hours ago, freejoy said:

    Everything is perfect. 

    Nothing is out of order. Took awhile for me to assimilate it.

  9. Posted

    I need new perspectives.

    I wanted a partner in my life. A man.

    So, I imagined him holding me when I sleep, imagined him kiss me while I wash the dishes, slapping my butt...all the good stuff.

    I used the emotional charge I had from falling in love with a man who didn't want a relationship (and I realized he was in my life to bring out unseen aspects of myself, in interactions with men, to take me to embrace my feminine more)

    I write three pages every morning. One night I had a dream. I was on a rooftop, (it felt like home) and my man just came home. He was a tall, strong man.  With long, dark hair and a long beard. He had this air of punk-rock...I grabbed his beard, played with it, and said 'My painter!'. Then kissed him.

    In my dream, I was the woman and the one seeing the whole picture from afar - awareness wasn't veiled in that dream

    We laid on a lounge, there on the rooftop, under the stars... I then woke up. I asked, thinking about this painter: 'Who are you? Where are you? When will you come?' As I felt he was the one I was waiting for. 

    I wrote about the dream that morning, in my three pages. 

    7 days later I went to a lake in my hometown. The sun finally came out. I wanted to feel it on my skin, and have a bath in the icy water. I took the opportunity to shoot a YouTube video on 'How to have an Ice Cold Bath' (part of my work)

    Two days later, I edited and posted the video. That night, one of my subscribers, made a love statement in a comment: 

    "I wanna be yours right now and for forever, you look like a world of fun omg can't stop smiling and being amazed :)) running that trail to the lake and then on top of that a cold bath, now that's FUN :))) be mine!"

    This was a guy I had met 15 years ago. He wanted a transfer from one art class into another. I wanted a transfer from a normal high school to the Arts Highschool. Our first encounter was some five hours, sitting in a classroom, just the two of us, drawing and talking. We saw each other two years during school, as friends. Not much. We then went our separate ways.

    I didn't know anything about him until about a month ago when he wrote to me, saying he saw my videos, and he appreciates my work. He asked me when I'll shoot the next, how I am...all that. He told me he is working on his master's degree in painting. He said he would like to go and fry some mushrooms outdoors with me, one day (turns out we're both vegans) I found it exciting to hear from him, back then. As I kinda liked him when I first saw him. We had a similar style. I am quite punkish myself. But that was it. He didn't write again. 

    When I saw his comment on YouTube, I was amazed. I wanted to see him. I hadn't seen him in 15 years. I wanted to know how he looks. But he didn't have any pictures on social media. Except a few from 10 years ago. I did, however, said yes. I wrote him and told him to come kiss me.

    He showed up at my door and I was amazed. He was the painter I had dreamed of 10 days prior to this encounter. Medium, dark hair, exact same beard, same body, same feeling...I instantly knew it was him. 

    We spent some 10 minutes looking into each other's eyes, hugging, laughing. There was this strong recognition. He said something like: "I've been waiting for you for so long!" My feelings were mutual.

    We spent a few hours together, hugging, kissing staring into each other eyes. 

    It's been four days. We have spent a few hours each day. I have come to learn that he is a brute force of nature. And I love this about him. I find him fascinating. 

    I have awakened to the nature of reality a while back. I have been working to create a life for me, that is in tune with my understanding. I gave up all drugs, for a few years now. I've built good, strong habits. Good morning routine. Plans, actions, creation. I still work to embody my understanding in the process.

    He, on the other hand, has come to see the nature of reality and has taken a different path. His approach is more on the complete freedom of being. And he feels like a tornado sometimes. He rises like a dragon, he even makes sounds like one. He has a strong passion and desire to punish people for their ignorant actions. He has great compassion for animals, but not much for humans. He doesn't really want to hurt humans, but his way of waking people up is through shaking their reality, like an earthquake. He feels a lot like God's justice sword. 

    On my journeys, I have shown people the nature of reality through embodying kindness, love, compassion, self-sacrifice, to such a degree, that people couldn't remain ignorant and made them rethink their approach to life. 

    He, on the other side, made people rethink their approach through his violent joy, absolute freedom of being. Drugged up, drunk, composed, spreading love through force (approaching sad, stressed people on the street with some silly games, roars, buffooning around ). You know your classic punk junkie.

    We talked a lot about his ways, his experiences. I can see his role.

    It makes me wonder what is his role in my life. Is he my partner? He has a tough time caring for himself. And he seems to enjoy being homeless (he had some three weeks of living on the streets and he enjoyed it) Can't say that I blame him. I sometimes wonder what it would be like to be homeless. To let yourself go completely into the hands of God. I have this fantasy of owning nothing but a backpack with some clothes, my laptop, my phone, my Nikon, crayons, paint, sketchbooks, taking Europe on foot, sleeping wherever, taking photos, shooting videos, drawing, writing about my experience, and showing it to people.

    On the other hand, there is this dream I am currently working towards - becoming an English teacher. Teach teenagers about life, while they develop their knowledge of the English language. Continue writing, and painting. Take my part in society. 

    And then I wonder if society is worth keeping.

    I guess this is where he comes in. He doesn't want any part in it. He only wants to shake it to its very core. 

    What do you make of this experience?

     

     

     

  12. Posted

    I can definitely say that art is not a human invention, but a human response to a calling from outside themselves. It's like you are shown a vision of something that does not exist and a voice says you can bring it into existence. So you sit down, take a brush and put colour. And as you paint, it evolves in front of you. It transforms, it reveals itself to you. A painting, in my experience, is a revelation. The end result is much more than the initial vision. It isn't even you that decides when it's finished. You just paint and paint. You take a step back, you look at it, a voice says paint a line there, put colour there, and you paint some more. You take another step back, you look at it and a voice says: 'It is done' and you look at it and marvel and feel deeply humbled and grateful. 

    Like this painting. This vision was revealed to me during meditation. After about 15 hours of work, in three days, I took a break to have lunch. I returned to the easel and as soon as I took the brush in my hand, a voice said: 'That's it. It is done.' I looked at it and agreed. It was done. Anything else on it would've been in vain. 

    91189274_10158441455889236_6688831760114909184_o.jpg

  13. Posted

    @JosephKnecht Thank you.

    And especially thank you for taking the time to read the stories.

    For some reason, I feel they are of importance.

    Telling a story and represent its essence through a painting or an illustration is bringing me a lot of joy.

    Everything else is to help me market my work. And the jewelry in hope that it will bring me a steady income.

    Thank you again for your kind words

     

  15. Posted

    Hello everyone. 

    I've been working hard on my life purpose. 

    I am an artist. I paint. I also enjoy writing.

    I created my website; a few months of struggles, introspection, creation, learning to build a website, learning marketing.

    I did it all to share my perspective. 

    I launched everything a week ago and it's moving slowly.

    I could really use your help in spreading it around, especially because my work goes into metaphysics, non-duality, and other not very popular topics.

    Check out my website: https://treereality.com

    Read the 2 stories I published so far: https://treereality.com/lonely-forever/

                                                                      https://treereality.com/story-of-enlightenment/

    You can like on Facebook:  https://facebook.com/treereality

    Follow on Instagram:  https://instagram.com/treereality 

    I also started my own YouTube channel. Just one video so far.

    The second one is coming up this week. 

    Please, if you can afford the time, I would really appreciate your support.

    I enjoy feedback as well. I am opened to criticism, suggestions. Feel free to speak freely.

    It is through feedback that I can learn and discover what it's eluding. 

    Thank you, everyone!

    Much love!

  17. Posted

    @Javfly33 Ok. Thank you.

    I guess I was hoping for a web developer to pop up here, willing to help :P

    @Michael569 Thank you for your suggestion.

    I have been reading on Elementor about this type of issue. They have a list of possible causes and solutions.  Still, my knowledge of coding and website building language is close to zero. 

    But I guess I will have to deepen my knowledge. Tomorrow morning, with a well rested brain. I will try it all. At least I have backed up my site in case I do some really stupid things

     

  18. Posted

    Hello everyone.

    I've been working on building my website for a while, now. It's almost done, but I keep getting issues with Elementor in my Woocommerce section. Just stuff not showing on the live page. I guess it's some sort of plugins, themes conflict. I have no idea how to sort it out and I could really use the help of someone who knows what they are doing. You Tube tutorials can only take you so far.

    Thank you

     

  20. Posted

    @dimitri  Thank you. I don't do what anyone says. Never did. I see people's points of view, I know my situation. If I can apply something to it, good, if not, I keep looking. I take into consideration all aspects.

    Thing is it feels good either way. The only thing I really care about right now is my art project. Before he had come with this proposal to me, I had already given up on the idea of getting my money back. When he told me about this course, I paused. I thought I might not have time for it. But the thought of going up the mountain, laughing with friends, learning to fly a wing upwards, unlike the parachute which only falls. Sounds like an adventure. I will meditate on it these days, see what feelings rise up - maybe they'll be more clear. 

    Thank you all for your insights 

  22. Posted

    13 minutes ago, Member said:

    you/the entire universe become eternal silence

    I find this to be a good description of my experience - it comes in a glimpse, none the less 

    34 minutes ago, George Paul said:

    not partial or some feelings or awareness

    What is partial? Feelings arise when in the body after immersed in existence. 

    What is awareness? I find awareness something which can't be described

    'Awareness is the state of being conscious of something. More specifically, is the ability to directly know and perceive, to feel, or to be cognizant of events.'

    The definition doesn't actually define awareness, but only defines how it works, how we perceive it, the weird thing, though is that we are aware of what we call 'awareness'. 

    So, in my ignorance, let me ask again, what is awareness?

  24. Posted

    40 minutes ago, George Paul said:

    In the sentence "I am God" the words "I" and "God" are mutualy exclusive. They can't be put in the same sentence.

    "I am made of God" or "I am a son of God" or "God made me" are more accurate.

    If I were God and tried to tell people this , I would literally say just  "I am".

    This if fucking creepy since I dont buy Christianity.

    I find this to be true for me as well. When I am totally immersed in existence, there is no sense of an I anymore, just awareness. Something I cannot name, and a sense of peace, love, joy, and wonder rises. 

    Also, there is wisdom within all religions.

    I was wondering about it one night, I was finding myself focusing on being fully in the now (Eckhart Tolle's teaching), observing what is in front of me  -  and it hit me! There is no now because the now is Nothingness, God, Love; as a human, you can only be in the past or future. To be in the Now means to not be in the world, but outside of it, through it, to be nothing, to be the space for it.  

    Actually, you are both at the same time, we just choose to be human, in the world, more than we choose nothingness. 

    Creation is God's will, your will. I find it more helpful to embrace it than to look for a way out. That being said, I do go into nothingness every morning for a few minutes. It helps me guide my day with love, instead of separation.

  25. Posted

    @kag101 I am. I always am. I am as kind and thoughtful with myself as with everything. It happens that I say no to people when I feel there is nothing for me to offer (I may find myself too caught up in work and rather spend my free time doing what I enjoy). Most times I overflow with love and joy, free time, and abundance. That gives me opportunities to help. 

    I have been considering the reason I am manifesting this friend into my life. He helped me with good insights when I was getting my project going. He also appeared in my life in a dark time (moving countries again took a heavy toll on my psyche) - I guess it was the perfect company at the time - I was confronted with some unconscious behavior in those months, a behavior I am grateful to have discovered - I feel he's a reflection of my past - my faraway past - grandparents past - people highly traumatized 

    My brain is still very much conditioned by the traumas in my history. I have cleared a lot, but there is still work to be done. I am grateful, none the less. 

    As for the paragliding course, it only starts in September. That is enough time to see how our friendship evolves and how much time I'll have for a new course.

    @Blacksmith Thank you for the exercise - I heard about it as well, I used it in making a couple of big decisions. I agree people are complex. I also feel like people we come in contact with are a reflection of ourselves, in some way. That is why I would rather embrace, than reject, and look for aspects I was not aware of before. 

    I'm not sure the urge to be appreciated is healthy. I know who I am; it shouldn't be of any concern to me if others can see it or not. The fact that sometimes it is, may reflect insecurity I have about that certain aspect. Also, it is man's nature to love women for their bodies, not their minds. A strong-willed woman is often too much to handle. It is man's nature to dominate. Of course, I wish for a man who doesn't need to dominate but collaborate. It just wasn't what I manifested so far, due to unconscious aspects. My friend forced a lot of this it into my awareness. I am grateful for it. 

    Thank you all for the kind thoughts