Leo Gura PUA

[Javfly33]

17 minutes ago, Keyhole said:

Women can sense that as well, even if it is authentic.
I've watched men repeatedly take on that role - and if they have to learn how to do it from an external source, then it isn't who they are underneath and all it takes is something that they can't control to show the women in their lives the truth.  You can't both be an awesome guy and a player, both of those are on opposite ends of the spectrum.
You're assuming that all these women attracted to players want to get married.  Marriage is a huge trap, and it keeps you tied to that player until they eventually cheat on you and you're left taking care of two kids by yourself - because people like that are not awesome, they are pretending to be awesome.

As for sex being a marketplace, oh yeah, I understand that, down to it's bones.  Absolutely.  

Women are going to catch on and they're just going to stop having sex with you guys altogether.  You guys will keep at it with your inhumane little tricks, until women just throw their hands in the air and say, "Ok, well... no more cake for any of you."  And then you'll have to learn how to be decent human beings.

You're using Russell Brand as an example?  That guy grosses me out.  That isn't game, he is making that woman feel uncomfortable.

I´ve spent much of my life not loving myself and feeling inferior. Obviously when I managed to be with girls it was a disaster because deep down I wasn´t confident in myself.

I recently began working on myself and loving myself. Now with girls I might be less fearful and might say some jokes here and there or be more confident. Maybe if a girl of the past sees me now he might consider if i´m being "fake".

"LOok, there´s @Javfly33 . He´s being reading pick up books and he´s being fake!"

You mean to tell me that, underneath my true self is self-denial? self-hate? Shame? Inferiority is my true self? 

How exactly you determine what is the true self of a guy, really?

A book helped me in all of this process too, that was an external source so...I guess all of the discovery of loving myself and therefore inevocally starting to be more authentic and maybe being less "good guy" (which is just "afraid guy", this is not just with girls, this is happening with my family relationships too) I just should go back ? Dont´t make much sense to me... 

[Leo Gura]

31 minutes ago, Keyhole said:

I've watched men repeatedly take on that role - and if they have to learn how to do it from an external source, then it isn't who they are underneath

You are unwittingly condemning men to stay losers.

Become a charming man is not something that happens naturally for most guys due to poor social conditioning. Becoming a man takes work! Being shy, unsociable, self-conscious, meek, fearful, angry, bitter, lonely, needy, inarticulate, poor at physical touch, bad sense of humor, etc -- these are not natural. This is the result of bad upbringing and lack of training.

It doesn't matter what source the man got his charm from. If he's charming, he's charming. That's real and girls respond accordingly because they don't care about the backstory of how he became charming.

[Forestluv]

40 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Pickup teaches how to become that kind of man.

To me, it seems like there is a distinction here between low-conscious blue/orange game and high-conscious Green/Yellow/Turquoise Game. Similar to how terms like "intelligence" or "god" can have low-conscious and high-conscious contexts.

I know from my own experience in dating the difference between the two. In the past, I would not have considered the Brand video as "Game", yet I'm cool with that being a higher evolved term to encourage lower-conscious blue/orange men to evolve up to. Yet, I'm still skeptical about the underlying energetics of how most men talk about "game". To me, it seems to be heavy on the lower side, yet there are often mixtures of both levels - so there are nuances. . . . For example, when I see a guy speaking of a woman he "scored" like an object and brags about getting a BJ from a married woman, without any apparent concern for her, it doesn't seem like high conscious Game to me. That type of stuff is not what Russell Brand level Game is about. He would not behave or talk like that. It's not his energetic orientation. 

I'm not an expert the pua game community, yet most of what I hear seems like the lower variety - at least to me. If the genuine mission of pua game is to help men evolved up to Russell Brand yellow levels - I'm totally for it. Yet to me, that doesn't seem to be the mainstream goal. 

[mandyjw]

2 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

It doesn't matter what source the man got his charm from. If he's charming, he's charming. That's real.

If you imagine he's charming, he's charming. Maybe learning pick up skills is the same usefulness as witchcraft, as long as it gives you the confidence and positive expectation, you get the results. There's no such thing as charming another.

Just Self Love. 

[Leo Gura]

11 minutes ago, Serotoninluv said:

For example, when I see a guy speaking of a woman he "scored" like an object and brags about getting a BJ from a married woman, without any apparent concern for her, it doesn't seem like high conscious game to me.

Of course most guys doing game are Orange, and some even Red. I've known guys who do game who are flat out rapists with pending legal cases against them. But this is rare. Most guys are Orange. Yes, many guys objectify women and sex. But you also have to understand, this is not a function of game itself, this is simply how most guys today think about sex. A stage Orange man will objectify women whether he learns game or not.

Russell Brand used to be heroin addict. So, yeah, people grow.

Trump's "locker room talk"? Honestly, lots of guys talk that way behind closed doors. That's excessive Orange mentality. It's just hidden.

You have too appreciate that pickup brings up into the open what has been repressed and hidden for centuries. Stage Blue repressed sex so much for so long that stage Orange swings in the opposite direction. There is still a social stigma about being open about the reality of dating and sex. Dating can be ruthless. Not just from the man's side from the woman's side too. Women are not angels in all this. They too are constantly manipulating to meet their survival needs.

[Farnaby]

40 minutes ago, Keyhole said:

Women can sense that as well, even if it is authentic.
I've watched men repeatedly take on that role - and if they have to learn how to do it from an external source, then it isn't who they are underneath and all it takes is something that they can't control to show the women in their lives the truth.  You can't both be an awesome guy and a player, both of those are on opposite ends of the spectrum.
You're assuming that all these women attracted to players want to get married.  Marriage is a huge trap, and it keeps you tied to that player until they eventually cheat on you and you're left taking care of two kids by yourself - because people like that are not awesome, they are pretending to be awesome.

As for sex being a marketplace, oh yeah, I understand that, down to it's bones.  Absolutely.  

Women are going to catch on and they're just going to stop having sex with you guys altogether.  You guys will keep at it with your inhumane little tricks, until women just throw their hands in the air and say, "Ok, well... no more cake for any of you."  And then you'll have to learn how to be decent human beings.

You're using Russell Brand as an example?  That guy grosses me out.  That isn't game, he is making that woman feel uncomfortable.

I think the key is whether you're just putting up a mask to overcompensate for your insecurities or if you're really consistently working on yourself and actually becoming more confident in your skin. It's pretty easy to notice it if you pay attention to the vibe. It's like someone who is trying to be funny but is actually feeling insecure/scared. The same applies to guys who are pretending to be completely confident, macho-type of guys. You can easily see through that façade. 

On the other hand, if you really work on yourself, you can slowly let go of limiting beliefs about yourself that make you feel insecure and actually embody real confidence. If you compare such a person with the person they were before, you might think they are being inauthentic, but I personally think they just have grown emotionally and become more secure in their own skin. 

This is all semantics and I think it's easy to tell intuitively if someone is putting up a fake act or if they are being authentic. 

[Emerald]

1 hour ago, Leo Gura said:

Not 25% of women. 100% of heterosexual women.

What you describe in your 2nd paragraph: the vibe, the energy, the nonchalance... that's exactly what game is.

You are thinking of game as a set of tricks men use to maniuplate women to sleep with them. But that's not real game, that's crap game. Real game is a man simply behaving in a strong, authentic, masculine way which generates a really charming vibe that girls cannot resist.

The charm isn't fake, it's real! The woman gets attracted not because she is verbally tricked, but because the guy is actually being an awesome guy to his bones.

Imagine your dream guy: strong, bold, charming, smooth, natural, funny, cool, exuding masculine vibe. That's what pickup trains a guy how to be. And once a guy becomes that way, every girl wants to marry him. The trick is, once a guy becomes that way he has so many options that he may not want to get married to any one girl. And thus a player is born.

Despite what they say, girls love players. She simply wants to lock him down for herself. That is the real issue. Girls struggle with players because they are hard to lock down.

In other words, sex is a marketplace and girls do not want to admit that.

Actually, you're not correct.

The connection comes from something much deeper and more elemental than that. Women, when connected to their intuition, they can sense who they have chemistry with. And in that way they find a match.

And this is very particular. I could see a guy that most women would label him a 10 and he'd be a 5 to me, because I can sense he is not a match. But a guy that most women might label a 5 would be off the charts to me because I can sense a match in my bones and in my heart. 

And that's not from some pick-up skill the guy has learned. It comes from feeling the natural essence of his personality and an intuitive sensing of congruency between him and I. And pick-up has a special way of interrupting and corrupting the male essence and filtering it through the "shoulds". I can really smell it on them. And as with any form of personal development, it tends to come from a sense of lack or insecurity.

Also, my matches tend not to fit into many of the things you mentioned. They're usually not bold, charming, smooth, or cool. That energy doesn't go with mine.

I am naturally attracted to men of a more reserved and introverted kind of nature... a man who doesn't wear his sexuality on his sleeve. A man who would likely find my specific attention special and not just another thing. Once a guy gets to a point where he no longer sees sex as special and meaningful, it pretty much guarantees that I can't really get much emotionally out of the experience because sex is much more about the communication of care and desire than anything else.

And I've been getting attractions to those of the male persuasion since I was 4 years old. Are you telling me that those 4 year old boys of yesteryear somehow learned game? The answer is no. And even as a child, I was always attracted to loner types that were not very gregarious. 

But I suppose you'd have to be a woman to truly know what it is that women are attracted to in guys. So, continue to do what works for you. But don't be so ignorant as to assume that you know that insides of the mechanism. It's very different from the inside. 

And while your methods will get you some success if you do the fishing. As I said, pick up and game works on 25% of women... which is a sizable minority. But you likely won't be attracting women who specifically seek you. 

 

 

[PenguinPablo]

@Leo Gura that doesn't count Leo! The woman is ovulating.

[mandyjw]

If Leo comes out against putting on an act to seduce women, he'll be the champion for all women.

Like our collective prince in shining armor. *yawn* See what you did there? You put the power right back in the man's hands. 

Come on now, that's not how you want this to end. That story was already written thousands of times. 

 

[Leo Gura]

1 hour ago, Emerald said:

I could see a guy that most women would label him a 10 and he'd be a 5 to me, because I can sense he is not a match. But a guy that most women might label a 5 would be off the charts to me because I can sense a match in my bones and in my heart.

Match is part of the process.

Of course not every woman will be a match with every man. That's all sorted out in the field.

It's not like if a guy has game he can attract/sleep with 100% of women. About 33% of women will love him, 33% of women will hate him, and 33% of women will be indifferent.

There's always an element of luck and personalities need to match up. That's why he chats with 10 women, 3 get attracted, 1 comes home.

A highly attractive man is actually more polarizing. Some women will absolutely hate him. But those who like him will LOVE him.

You also have to keep in mind that not all guys with game are the same. Each guys attracts a specific subset of female personality types. Because game is expressed differently through different personality types. Game is not a specific type of guy, it's general principles of attractiveness which are incarnated uniquely by each guy, attracting different kinds of women. For example, humor is going to vary from guy to guy. Guys can have very different senses and styles of humor. But learning the general principles of humor will help every guy, no matter what his style of humor is. And all girls love some style of humor. Humor can be dry, witty, intellectual, sexual, subdued, bold, sarcastic, self-deprecating, dark, physical, nerdy, etc.

[Hello from Russia]

Hitting on women is cool and fancy,

Got a nice wife this way .

But I guess this whole attraction thing is not limited to women and just getting sex or a wife

What do you guys think of applying similar techniques\concepts on men? Not in the sexual sense, but, for example, in a business setting. When you're doing your biz and you have to pitch your services to other guys. How it is really different from the pickup?

Would be cool to know your perspectives on the simillarities\differences of this whole process. 

 

[Javfly33]

48 minutes ago, Keyhole said:

I have no idea what you should do, I am not a man and can't give advice for what men should do.  I can only offer up what I intuit from interacting with men who act like this from my female perspective.  Women can see what is underneath of a man when he is under pressure. 

If you are just building yourself a strong shell, and are still that person underneath, when the time comes for you to truly be a man - and to use that masculine energy for something other than procreation, if your shell breaks and she sees that you are not who you pretended to be, then the woman will lose attraction. 

That's why women test men.  We have to.  There is a lot more at stake for a female than there is for a male.

@Keyhole Why people go to therapists then? People can't change then?

I feel you are projecting your idea of masculinity as a genetic fixed trail.

I'm pretty sure if I tell you that I had a depressive personality all my life and I started using 'external sources' to fix that and become a happy person , you wouldn't call that fake and try to call out the 'underneath' depressive 'real me'.

 

[mandyjw]

34 minutes ago, Etherial Cat said:

You can also feel that condescending love ? Looking forward to fight with dozens of other women for it...

No offense. I have a tremendous respect for you Leo (please don't take any of my post as ill intentioned), but when it comes to relationships, it's one of the few places where I seek for other advices and deeply question your point of view.

I was just trying to point out how we convince ourselves that the reason we don't feel love is because it's someone's fault or because we are missing something. 

The power is always within us. Our state is the state the world reflects back to us. 

Women really have an incredible opportunity to wake up to this because we've been told we've believed for so long that we are the vulnerable ones. So much so we look to the leader of an organization, someone with power or fame to validate the love we won't offer ourselves. 

You aren't Snow White. There's no Prince. You made up the whole story as an expression of love. The love was always there, all along. 

Edited January 30, 2020 by mandyjw

[Derek White]

I don’t get what’s so wrong about learning how to communicate better, learning humour, tricks to communicate, improving your personality, and dressing better?

If you think this is fake then women who wear hot dressed and makeup are fake too...

Authenticity doesn’t mean you vomit everything that comes in your mind without any filters. 

[Leo Gura]

3 minutes ago, Derek White said:

If you think this is fake then women who wear hot dressed and makeup are fake too...

Of course women keep all of their inner demons locked up in a bottle until the day after you sleep with her. Then that bottle gets uncorked and the drama begins, LOL.

Most women are what they called Ronald Reagan, "An authentic phony"

[mandyjw]

5 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Of course women keep all of their inner demons locked up in a bottle until the day after you sleep with her. Then that bottle gets uncorked and the drama begins, LOL.

And whose demons would those be, really? 

[Galyna]

@Leo Gura Leo, what would you recommend to men in terms of pick up who are really seeking an authentic relation? Do you use these approaches you write yourself?

I am not talking about getting laid or to satisfy sexual needs. I would like to hear your opinion about authentic relations. How would you screen for a potential partner for a long-term relations? What approach would you use with her?  

 

 

[Meetjoeblack]

1 hour ago, Keyhole said:

I have no idea what you should do, I am not a man and can't give advice for what men should do.  I can only offer up what I intuit from interacting with men who act like this from my female perspective.  Women can see what is underneath of a man when he is under pressure. 

If you are just building yourself a strong shell, and are still that person underneath, when the time comes for you to truly be a man - and to use that masculine energy for something other than procreation, if your shell breaks and she sees that you are not who you pretended to be, then the woman will lose attraction. 

That's why women test men.  We have to.  There is a lot more at stake for a female than there is for a male.

There's a lot of truth here.

There's a reason why I don't believe in unconditional love. There's a divorce stat and it gets more informative when viewing it on gender.

Very few are good at pickup. I would be shocked if more than 3guys in this thread approach. Even fewer are competent after the approach which is only go.

Even more annoying is the topic and moralizing game.  ?

Dude doesn't approach. Can't pull. Has a opinion on game and pickup. Oh virtue signaling lol.

There's nothing like it.

[Javfly33]

28 minutes ago, Keyhole said:

If you feel you need a therapist to work on yourself, that would probably be more beneficial than learning pick up.  One teaches you how to manipulate the opposite sex for personal gain and the other offers perspectives on how to become a more integrated person.  

 

Maybe I think the misunderstanding is the idea you have of pick up. There's pick up that it's more focused on skills and technique and other kind of pick up that is more just about social skills. You shouldn't generalize.

We agree then, although I gotta say I wouldn't call being genuine as a sinonym of masculine. I definitely think there goes more stuff into the masculine "energy" as it goes in the feminine.

Although I will agree that is the most effortless way to live.

[Derek White]

@Leo Gura Yes, I think people (disproportionately women) are too wrapped up in ideals of what a relationship should look like and they don’t see the reality of the situation.

@Keyhole I think pick up artistry and personal development collide into each other. If you are not vomiting whatever comes to your mind, then you are doing a form of pick up artistry whether you know it or not. If you don’t like the word PUA we can call it communication skills.

Yes, you can do harm to others with PUA. But that’s true with any (communication) skill.