Emerald

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About Emerald

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  • Birthday 04/26/1989

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    USA
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    Female
  1. You seem not to have grocked my main point that I was trying to drive across to you. My point was not to say... here's my experiences with misogyny. My point was to say that hatred of any particular group is never going to allow someone peace of mind or a strong sense of self. Hatred toward whole groups of people always comes from insecurity. And I only bring up my experiences to give you a sense of how misogyny looks from my perspective... and it doesn't matter how confident the front is of the misogynistic person.
  2. Definitely! I use that quote all the time to teach unconditional compassion. Everyone's ALWAYS doing the best they can... no exceptions.
  3. People can always intuitively tell when people are lying and inauthentic. Untrustworthiness shows up in subtle but pervasive ways in the facial expressions, gestures, behavioral patterns, and speech patterns. And this tendency is absolutely costing you all the best things in the world! The opportunities that you would have if you were honest and trustworthy are running away from you at a million miles per hour because your dishonesty is repelling them from you. The tragedy is that you don’t realize that lying is causing you to miss out… because it all happens silently based off of people mentally picking up on dishonest vibes and not trusting you or wanting to get closer to you. If you keep being dishonest, people with good character and self-respect won’t want to be around you. They won’t say anything to that effect, they will just quietly avoid you so that the interaction doesn’t happen without you ever being the wiser. And you will miss the opportunity to have healthy relationships and friendships with these people And you’ll also be treated much worse with more hostility because you don’t pass the sniff test. And you’ll miss out on other types of non-relationship related opportunities too. I emphasize all of this to show you that what you’re doing with these lies is that you’re being penny wise and pound foolish. You’re cutting the corners of honesty to avoid some kind of discomfort… and you’re inviting WAY worse discomforts into your life.
  4. It is not possible to hate another person or group of people and be at peace with one’s self. And as a woman who’s been on the receiving end of misogyny many times, I can tell you that misogyny always comes from deep levels of insecurity and fears of being inferior to women… and a deep resistance to one’s own Feminine side. Misogynistic men are the ones who are most afraid of women… even if that fear comes out in the form of anger. If you think the issue is with women… think again. The call is always coming from inside the house… and I’m sure that (deep down) you know this.
  5. Here’s a list of some of my most favorite acclaimed women who have been my top role models that have had the most impact on me… Jean Raffa Bjork Marianne Williamson Teal Swan Frida Kahlo And here’s a list of all the female role models that I can think of off the top of my head that I’ve drawn some level of inspiration from… Simone Wiel June Singer Maureen Murdoch Aurora Jean Shinoda Bolen Jessica McClintock Wangechi Mutu Chappell Roan Natalie Wynn Danit Dolly Parton
  6. Here's a helpful post for anyone who's interested in doing Shadow Work for Personal Development. One thing that has become evident to me in my Shadow Work practice is that there tends to be 4 main reasons why people repress parts of themselves away into the Shadow. I'll list them below with a brief description for each... To preserve an identity - When we identify ourselves with a particular quality that we label as good or desirable in some way, we will try to preserve that identity (in our own eyes and in the eyes of others.) And the way we do this is by denying and repressing any quality in ourselves that might undermine the qualities that we identify with. To preserve a worldview - Our identity is always built upon the foundation of our worldview. So, worldview preservation is often identity preservation in disguise. For example, if I'm the Pharaoh in Ancient Egypt, my identity as the Pharaoh slots directly into a particular cosmology and a very specific way of viewing reality. And if someone comes over from Ancient Greece with a totally different cosmology and a different Pantheon, this might threaten my identity as the Pharaoh. To cope with trauma - When we experience events in our lives that produce emotions in the Nervous System that are too intense to process at a given time, the body/Nervous System shuts the processing of these feelings down and we go unconscious to them. And the parts of our psyche that bore the brunt of these experiences will also be made unconscious. That's where this type of repression comes from. To cope with unmet needs - When we have a chronically unmet need (especially one that we've never had met before) we have an in-built mechanism for coping with this unmet need. And that is to go unconscious to the parts of the personality that are most in touch with that need. For example, if we need connection from our parents as children, but our parents aren't capable of giving us that connection... then we may go unconscious to this part of us that has this connection need. And we may feel like we don't value connection at all and are more of a loner type... but down in the Shadow there is a part of ourselves that's constantly seeking connection in subtle ways.
  7. Personally, I've had plenty of struggles in my own life... material and otherwise. (And that certainly isn't uncommon, even for people in first world nations as suffering is everywhere) But I still have a hard time stomaching all the suffering of the world. I can't imagine what it would have been like if I was a teenager with this much access. It's just technology allowing for a widening of the circle of concern for sensitive individuals. Edit: It reminds me of the case study on chimps where researchers were studying chimps and there was a group of depressed chimps among them. And so, they separated out the depressed chimps from the rest of the group to see what would happen to the depressed chimps and non-depressed chimps. And what happened is that the whole group of chimps died. It's just that the depressed chimps were extra sensitive and functioning like a canary in the coal mine. And the other less sensitive chimps couldn't heed the warning signs with the depressed chimps gone.
  8. My view on this is that it's wisest to make money only off of things that provide real value to society at that is what money/wealth is meant to be a symbol of. And trading Crypto back and forth is mostly just pushing numbers back and forth and playing a game that doesn't really lead to any value-based outcomes.
  9. No, I don't own any gold or silver. But I apologize if it came across as me judging or anything like that. I was just thinking of possible interpretations of why someone might throw away someone else's things. Like I said... take it with a grain of salt as I was just exploring possibilities and I don't know you or the situation personally. It seems that there are some feelings of anger towards your dad though. And you may want to talk to someone about them to work them out.
  10. I suspect it has to do with the fact that girls/women tend to be more emotionally and intuitively attuned to pain and suffering compared to boys/men who tend to be a bit more detached. And the internet has given a direct window into all the sufferings of the world. I know it impacts me very strongly because I can feel the pain of the world as a constant looming presence far more than I ever did before. My ignorance and the lack of the internet (in the capacity it is today) in my teens and early 20s kept me insulated from taking on all the pains of the world. But now everything has opened up to reveal all the profound suffering in ways that weren't as front and center as they are now. And I've thought "Jeez! I'm glad that I wasn't constantly experiencing this soup of worldly suffering in my formative years and that I was numbed out from it because my world was allowed to be smaller." There is an almost maternal instinct to want to alleviate the sufferings of the world... and yet no one takes these vulnerabilities seriously and just brush it off as "wokeness" or moralization or being a killjoy... etc. This is probably also why you see a divide politically between young men and women. Young women tend to be very progressive and attuned to all the problems going on globally and use the internet to connect with others who are involved in similar progressive causes... while young men tend to be more focused towards individualistic forms of content around self-betterment. So, young men may have ways of keeping themselves insulated from the sufferings of the world via individualistic focus, self-improvement focus, anti-wokeness, and other ways of feeling individualistically empowered and ignoring and detaching from collective pain and trauma. But these things are difficult not to feel and notice for more Feminine individuals who are more attuned to under-currents of pain. This is especially difficult when there is very little that can be done to move the needle to create relief for the suffering.
  11. Every year in the Spring, I participate in an Ayahuasca ceremony. (In fact, I have my yearly ceremony next week) And back in Spring of 2022, I received an insight from Ayahuasca that I'd like to share as it revealed to me a key ingredient to connection with other people, nature, and the universe at large. That key ingredient to connection is ordinariness. Up until that point, I had always gotten by by polarizing into my differences and becoming exceptional and extraordinary. And I always identified strongly with being a bit rebellious and strange. And I had valued being different and extraordinary since I was around 13 or so and was always seeking for ways to differentiate myself from others and to be be more and more unique. And I would often have aversions to ordinariness. Like I'd feel really threatened at the prospect of being ordinary in relation to other people because I didn't like the idea of blending into a crowd. Then, in this Ayahuasca ceremony the medicine brought me through this process where I was oscillating (psychologically and emotionally) into two different states. One state was more like my default state, where it would polarize me into extraoridnariness and uniqueness to the exclusion of ordinariness and averageness... and then it would bring me back into integration with ordinariness. And it polarized me back and forth into these two states of 'extraordinary and disconnected' to 'ordinary and connected'... back and forth... over and over again to make sure I got the message. And when I was polarized into the extraordinariness to the exclusion of ordinariness, I felt totally alone in the universe and disconnected from all things in existence. And all the pressure of the universe would bear down on my head, neck, and shoulders like Atlas holding the weight of the world on his shoulders. Then, it would re-integrate me with ordinariness... and it would be like I was puzzle piece that effortlessness clicked back into the puzzle of life. And it made me feel like a human amongst other humans and totally intertwined and connected with other people. And I was able to feel myself as part of nature and part of the universe at large. And all that existential pressure dissipated as it was diffused evenly over all of existence... instead of it all bearing down on my shoulders (and mine alone). It brought me back and forth between connection and disconnection quite a few times. Then, it was like on this threshold between connection and disconnection... and individualism and collectivism. And it was bringing collectivist words into my mind like family and community... and I could sense a little hint of disgust in my intuitive response to these words that was very subtle but noticeable under the influence of the medicine. And I sat there at the threshold between connection and disconnection... contemplating whether to relinquish my hermit-like ways and cross the threshold into connection or not. It also occurred to me later that this is why human beings feel so disconnected from nature... because we see ourselves as extraordinary animals and NOT ordinary animals. And the sense of identification with extraordinariness makes us feel like we live above and outside of nature.
  12. On one hand, it seems like it's possible that your mom doesn't respect your boundaries or your things... or it could be some attempt to control. On the other hand, I have a question just to get clarity on the situation. Do you have a tendency to hold onto things of sentimental value or perceived practical value that most people would get rid of? And do you have a strong attachment to things to the degree that you struggle to let go of anything and they clutter your space? If not, the issue probably is because of some attempt to control on the part of your mom. If the latter is the case, it could be that she's trying to help you let go of things that you struggle to let go of... but going about it in ways that are hurtful and counter-productive. Like if someone has issues with hoarding, the mind attaches a lot of meaning to objects (even things like paper towels, empty containers, miscellaneous knick knacks, etc.) to the degree where losing those objects can feel like losing a loved one. And this leads to hoarding everything and never wanting to let go of anything. And often times, family members will throw away or donate things that the person who hoards is attached to in an attempt to help them. And this creates a lot of grief and can make the hoarding worse. So, my first thought is that your mom is trying to control you through these behaviors or is just being inconsiderate. But my second thought (given that you still feel grief about it after quite some time) is that, if you have a tendency to hoard things or to assign a lot of meaning to objects, that she might be trying to help you break out of it in counter-productive ways. Though this is a shot in the dark. So take it with a grain of salt.
  13. That's usually the case. Most people who are casually to overtly racist just see themselves as people who see the truth while others are blind to it or to afraid to say it. Many just see themselves as brave truth tellers simply telling it like it is in the face of the lies of political correctness.
  14. The benefits is wholeness and a realization of Self. Because everyone has both Masculine and Feminine traits, resisting the embodiment of either of these 'energies' will lead to repression and a splitting of wholeness.