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Wicca FAQ This FAQ list is designed to answer many of the questions I frequently receive about Wicca. Some of the questions in this section are answered elsewhere on the site, but I listed them again here for a handy reference source. New questions will continue to be added as I am asked. Without further ado, here they are: Does Wicca have any connection to Satanism or devil-worship? Certainly not. Wicca is a pre-Christian nature religion, and as such is a Pagan religion. The word "Pagan" is derived from the Latin word paganus, which literally translates into English as "country dweller," and it does not mean "anti-Christian," as the Bible would have us believe. It has no connection whatsoever to Satanism, which is an entirely unique and categorically non-Pagan religion. For those who are curious, Satanism was founded in America in 1966 by the late eccentric dark magician Anton LaVey, who wrote several books on his religion's unique theology, The Satanic Bible and The Satanic Witch [sic] being the two most well known. The latter book title was inaccurate and unfortunate, since it incorrectly implied that witches are Satanic. Pagans do not even believe in Satan! Satan, which is derived from a Hebrew word that translates into "adversary" in the English language, is a strictly Christian invention that first appears in the New Testament. In fact, true Satanists do not even believe in Satan as a distinct, self-aware being, as Christians do. Instead, they worship their own ego, or higher self, as divine, and merely use Satan as a metaphor, since he, according to the Biblical story handed down to us by the Christians, was a rebel against the Judeo-Christian God's rule over the cosmos. Thus, calling themselves 'Satanists' symbolizes their rebellion against the prevailing Christian mindset that currently dominates Western society. Satanists also practice a form of dark magick that Pagans generally do not perform, and they use an inverted pentagram with the face of the notorious goat-headed, demonic god-form known as Baphomet inscribed within, and this being seems to be a bizarre, non-Pagan permutation of the Pagan Horned God, and Baphomet appears in the mystical teachings of the radical Christian sects such as the Knights Templar and the Freemasons (among other mystical underground sects throughout the Middle Ages), and this being is not recognized by Wiccan theology at all (except in its "normal" form as the Horned God). Further, the Satanists also use an inverted Christian cross as a symbol of their religion, whereas the only type of cross utilized by Pagans is the Celtic cross (which looks like an upright Christian cross with a circle surrounding the middle, and is often used by Neo-Druids and Celtic Wiccans as a symbol of protection and spirituality). Satanism was a child of the New Age explosion of the late 20th century (Wicca actually appeared on the scene 12 years earlier then Satanism), which also brought with it the resurgence of Pagan religions, the renewed interest in the practice of Ceremonial Magick, the return of many other pre-Christian religions, huge interest in the martial arts, Yoga and other esoteric arts and disciplines from the East, spirituality, astrology, the reading of Tarot cards and other forms of divination, U.F.O.'s and "Space Brother" contacts, the quasi-spiritual social counterculture movement of the hippies and "flower children" and a general interest in the paranormal, none of which were directly connected to each other. Thus, Satanism is generally recognized by most New Agers as a true religion, and as such is legally protected under the U.S. Constitution (the Church of Satan claims to have been offered tax exempt status but to have refused it on moral grounds, and the U.S. military officially recognized Satanism as a legitimate religion in 1999), but it has sometimes been stated, including by Anton LaVey, that the genuine religion of Satanism is simply a rebellious parody of Christianity (though most of its members seem to take the religion very seriously). Paganism, however, long predates both Christianity and the conception of Satan. Satanists also believe in a lot of harsh metaphysical tenets that are considerably different from what most Pagans believe (which the Satanists refer to as the Nine Satanic Statements and the Eleven Satanic Rules of the Earth, which are far different then the Wiccan's single tenet for moral conduct, the Wiccan Rede) and the "dark" magick practiced by Satanists is very different from the loving nature-friendly magick practiced by Pagans (though the Satanists have borrowed some of the same ideas for ritual structure used by modern Pagans, but these were largely culled from Ceremonial Magick, which dates back to the Middle Ages). For example, the Satanists do not adhere to the same ethics in practicing their brand of magick as Wiccans are in practicing Witchcraft, such as the Law of Threefold Return (an ethic which the Satanists are openly critical of), and Satanists are therefore free to place curses upon people they consider to be their enemies (individuals adept at magick, however, can cast protection spells to very effectively block the magickal attacks of others, and even to deflect it back upon them). The devil-worshipping cults that murder children and virgins are almost entirely an urban myth popularized by American culture to justify attacks on non-Christian religions by the law. They have little basis in fact, and do not apply to the genuine religion of Satanism. In conclusion to this point, Satanism is not a Pagan religion, but is instead in a class all its own, and is thereby not connected to Paganism despite the fact that it was born during the same New Age explosion of interest in the occult that first appeared in the late 20th century (as described above). For anyone interested in learning more about Satanism, the Church of Satan has a web site, and I advise you to go there, since I am not an expert on Satanism, and my site is not about the latter religion, or to pick up one of LaVey's several books, all of which, I believe, are still in print and can be found in the New Age section of any bookstore or catalog alongside books on Ceremonial Magick, Wicca, U.F.O's, astrology, the paranormal, and other New Age topics (but will not be found in stores which cater exclusively to Wicca or Paganism in general, for reasons explained elsewhere in this section). It should be noted that Wiccans greatly resent Satanists sometimes referring to themselves as "witches," or calling their groups "covens" (the word for a Wiccan prayer group) since there is actually no such thing as a 'Satanic witch' (despite many arguments to the contrary made by Satanists...their definition of "witch" appears to be anyone that practices any type of magick or magickal system, which is not accurate...witches are practitioners of Witchcraft, a particular type of magick...Satanic magick is quite distinct, as is Ceremonial Magick, Shamanism, etc.). Actually, Satanists still following the teachings of LaVey refer to their groups as grottos, but the members of a growing splinter group led by LaVey's former disciple Lord Egan, who call their organization the First Church of Satan (go to their web site to see their views and how they differ from LaVey's organization) still refer to their groups as "covens," and some of the writers of this group attempt to link themselves to Wiccan history in certain ways, and insist that the word "witch" isn't exclusive to Wicca, and emphasize the argument that Witchcraft and Wicca aren't analogous (the web site Religious Tolerance describes Wicca and Witchcraft as being separate due to all of the confusion over the connection between the two). I'll address this popular issue of whether or not Witchcraft and Wicca are directly connected in more detail below. It should be further noted that the beliefs of Wicca and Satanism are considerably different from each other, and one was not inspired by the other in any way, though both groups are indeed linked to magickal practices from the past, such as Ceremonial Magick, a fact which Satanist author Diane Vera attempts to use to prove that there is indeed a "connection" between the two religions (see below for a link to a detailed critique of Ms. Vera's essay by this author, which appears elsewhere on this site). They are not, in fact, directly connected to each other, but were influenced by similar movements and did indeed borrow their magickal practices from some of the same sources, but their ethics and beliefs are quite distinct from each other. I am notattempting to imply that Satanists are "evil," or that their religion is invalid to those who adhere to it any more then Buddhism, for example, is invalid to Buddhists (as Vera suggests many Wiccans do when they declare "We are not Satanists!"), and I fully admit that their religion is misrepresented by the public the same as Wicca often is. I am merely stating that Wiccans do not worship the concept of "evil" (actually, contrary to popular belief, and as I said before, neither do Satanists, though as also stated above, they do believe in some rather harsh tenets that in no way, shape or form resemble Wiccan beliefs), but is a loving nature based religion. It should also be noted that Satanism makes no attempt to connect their beliefs to nature. Furthermore, Satanism originated in America, and remains almost entirely an American phenomenon, and was never based on any Pagan religion (despite certain ritual ideas they borrowed from various sources that Wiccans also borrowed from; see above). Wicca, on the other hand, emerged in England a decade earlier then Satanism before moving to the U.S., and it has rapidly become a world-wide religious phenomenon, though mostly centered in the Western nations, and is not confined to just one country as Satanism essentially is. There is also the social conflict concerning the Satanists' usage of the pentagram (albeit an inverted version of it with the face of Baphomet in the center, which does not appear in the original version of the pentagram from ancient times that is now utilized by Wiccans), which denigrates the symbol as "Satanic" when its original, upright version is used by the Wiccans and Ceremonial Magicians as a powerful symbol of protection from evil, and to represent the five mystical elements of antiquity. Look elsewhere in this section for further info on the pentagram controversy. It should also be noted that the terms "Witchcraft," "witch," "Satanist," and even "Christian" are often used in numerous different ways by different authors who are simply utilizing their own personal interpretation and/or bias concerning such words, rather then the 'official' defination of each. To see what Religious Tolerance has to say about the false linkage of Wicca with Satanism, refer to their article Is Wicca A Form of Satanism? about this subject. For those who would like to read a very detailed response of mine to an article written in 1992 by Satanist Diane Vera, who attempted to connect Wicca to her religion, please go here. Do Wiccans cast spells to hurt or manipulate people like we see on shows like Bewitched, Sabrina the Teenaged Witch, Charmed and Buffy the Vampire Slayer, or in recent films such as The Craft? Absolutely not. First, I'll talk about the shows, then move on to the films. Those shows, despite doing a bit of good to portray some of the witches featured in them as decent human beings, are still far from accurate in their depictions of magick in general and Witchcraft in particular, and the characters featured in each of the shows in no way, shape or form resemble real people who practice Wicca, and in fact these shows cater to fictionalized misperceptions of both witches and Witchcraft. Bewitched, at least, had some sociological benefit as being a slightly disguised attempt to provide a metaphor for a "mixed" couple struggling to live in a disapproving society, which was a bold move to make in the oppressive, right-wing and tightly controlled television atmosphere of the 60's (which was not lost on the late star Elizabeth Montgomery, who was an excellent social activist that openly fought for issues such as gay rights), whereas Sabrina, the Teenaged Witch has no redeeming qualities whatsoever outside of simply entertaining us, as it fails to realistically portray teen issues as well as Witchcraft [which puzzles me as to why the star Melissa Joan Hart, who is actively involved with the production of the show and presumably has at least some say over the quality of the scripts, has become such a role model to teen girls; however, in all fairness, she and the rest of the production crew is probably at least to some degree stifled by the partial control Archie Comics has over the show, which originated the character of Sabrina and owns the copyrights, and whose socially "harmless" stories and characters have always upheld and reflected "traditional" values of America, which does not include Paganism; one should have seen those dubious Christian propaganda comics featuring the Archie characters that Archie Comics collaborated with Spire Christian Comics to publish during the 70's, so it's perhaps remarkable that the comics company even included a "witch" in their books at all, since witchcraft is supposed to be "anti-Christian" according to the Bible). Charmed, unlike the other two shows, is at least serious in tone, and is actually enjoyed by several Wiccans I know, and has a following among those who have a purely aesthetic interest in the mystic arts, including the Pagan crowd; however, though better then the other shows, it still in no way portrays magick and witches accurately, and in fact doesn't even pretend to do so (it likewise never mentions the three female stars of the show as being "Wiccans," though it does call them witches), but despite the amusing storylines of the show, any Wiccan will tell you that they watch it purely for entertainment purposes, and many others, such as myself, have serious reservations about watching it at all, since many folks outside of the New Age crowd who watch it probably assume that it's an attempt to accurately portray magick and Witchcraft (which it isn't), or are turned off from magick completely due to the show's obvious fantasy elements. Some Wiccan fans of the show have defended its unrealistic depiction of Witchcraft by saying that an accurate portrayal of magick and Wicca would be considered too boring by the public, something the producers of such shows would undoubtedly agree with. I, however, disagree, as I believe a good writer with an accurate understanding and respect for Wicca and real magick could produce a very worthwhile series about real Wiccans, which would be informative in its portrayal of an alternate, non-mainstream religious philosophy, as well as depicting the millennia old art of magick as it is actually practiced by us, as opposed to simply providing cotton-candy entertainment for the masses, and meeting all of their unrealistic expectations. Further, I believe that the aforementioned inaccuracies, despite the assertion that it is "less boring" then the reality, is still a bad excuse for any Wiccan to support the show, since it spreads misinformation to the public and encourages ignorance and stereotypes about both Wicca and the practice of magick in general to the less informed members of the public, and could easily end up working against us if a new hysteria against our religion should crop up in the future [something our good buddy Pat Robertson has been attempting to do with his right-wing attempts to officially turn the U.S. into a "Christian nation," and denouncing the Pagan religions for attacking the "traditional" values of this country by encouraging women to fight for equal rights, accepting homosexuality and providing a threat to Christian authority figures and their economic power]. We need to get the truth out, and not cater to popular stereotypes just to make a more entertaining product. For example, I'd love to see how many contemporary African-Americans would be entertained by the portrayal of black people in that old 50's sitcom Amos and Andy should it be re-run today, which displayed every stereotype about blacks that existed at the time in the name of entertainment, or how they would react to people suggesting that depicting these stereotypes outside of satire could possibly be considered entertaining to the people and culture it misrepresents (in fact, many black activists, including filmmaker Spike Lee, have complained that modern black sitcoms are still inaccurate in their portrayal of black Americans). The same can be said for other popular shows which extensively feature magick, and purport to depict Witchcraft in particular, such as Buffy the Vampire Slayer, which also boasts very inaccurate depictions of the mystic arts, and even though the show isn't about witches in particular, Buffy's friend Willow is a witch who often uses Witchcraft, and witches and Witchcraft in this show are depicted just as inaccurately as they are in Charmed, and has likewise led some of its less enlightened teen viewers to the study of real magick and Wicca with the wrong expectations, though I imagine fewer people take this show seriously then the others, and do not consider this series to be anything more then pure fantasy. In fact, this situation recalls a similar problem once addressed by the well-known American ninja Shidoshi Stephen Hayes concerning the public misperceptions of the famous and sometimes maligned esoteric martial art of Ninjitsu (also of great interest to, and popularized by, the same New Age movement that brought Wicca to the public consciousness). Hayes pointed out how the many ninja films produced during the ninja craze of the early 80's (such as the American Ninja film series and the several films featuring Sho Kosugi, perhaps the most popular and memorable of the latter being Revenge of the Ninja, not to mention the enormous amount of direct to video dreck produced during this time) very inaccurately depicted ninjas and Ninjitsu to the public and fueled many stereotypes about ninjas being mindlessly violent and bloodthirsty, most of them being connected to crime syndicates and misrepresented both ninja philosophy and Japanese culture in general (among several other things) for the purpose of providing mindless entertainment to the public, and he personally refused to be involved in anyof these film projects, despite several financially lucrative offers, and many other practitioners of the art have said they were glad when the ninja craze faded from the public limelight completely by the end of the 80's decade and returned the art to "the shadows" where it was safer from being misrepresented. The recent movies dealing with Witchcraft and witches are even worse then the TV productions. The Craft was an absolute atrocity, as it in no way accurately depicted Wicca (and happily, never mentioned it) and portrayed several young girls using magick to seek revenge and to hurt and manipulate other people. The latter film unfortunately gained a cult following and encouraged lots of young people to seek out Wicca, thinking they could find a means of achieving control and power over other people, only to be shocked (and thankfully disappointed) once they realized the truth about Wiccan beliefs and magickal ethics, such as the Law of Threefold Return (which, surprisingly, wasactually described in the film!), that would have quickly destroyed the vengeful practitioners seen in the movie if they were attempting to use magick in real life as they did on the screen; the fact that a version of the Law of Threefold Return was shown onscreen did little to deter many people from their desire to learn magick for power and manipulative purposes. The film should be viewed strictly as mindless and puerile entertainment, and not as a study of Wicca and Witchcraft. In fact, the film was condemned by the Wiccan community as encouraging fear and negative stereotypes against magick in general and Wiccans in particular, even if this wasn't the filmmakers' intentions (which I presume was simply to make lots of money off of a popular if very misunderstood subject by playing off of those public misperceptions). Even the more recent and popular independent production The Blair Witch Project in no way portrayed Witchcraft accurately, and once again fueled public misconceptions of a "witch" as a mysterious and deadly entity to be feared, although at least the producers left a disclaimer in the title credits which stated that the film was entirely fictional and in no way was meant to depict the religion of Wicca with any type of accuracy, and was intended as pure entertainment. The producers of The Craft should have done the same thing, since even though the word "Wicca" was never used in the film, the type of magick we practice is commonly referred to as "the Craft," so they were likely aware of Wicca, but either failed to do accurate research on the subject or, worse, simply ignored the truth as being less entertaining then the stereotypes, and figured no one would care, which displays even more irresponsibility on their parts. Not only is no aspect of the Wiccan religion displayed with any accuracy in these shows and films, but the portrayal of magick and Witchcraft leaves much to be desired. Never mind the fact that most spells cannot be accomplished right away, or to enact such blatant changes on matter and energy. As any witch or magician can attest, spells do work, but contrary to what we see in movies and on TV, most of them take time to manifest on the physical plane, and usually do so in a mundane manner rather then in spectacular fashion (although the latter does occur in very rare instances). This is because magick always takes the path of least resistance when it manifests on the physical plane. Also contrary to what we often see in fiction, it is the will and intent of the witch, magician or priest/ess that causes magick to occur, and it is not embodied in physical objects such as wands or daggers, these being but tools for the practitioner to use in summoning or directing the flow of magickal energies, though constant use of such objects will indeed saturate them with the personal energy of the user, and objects such as jewelry can be "enchanted" so as to attract or repel certain influences about the person wearing them (i.e., love, protection, money, etc). Magick is usually defined as using the power of the mind, combined with tapping into natural energies inherent in nature, to make changes on the physical plane in accordance with one's will. Healing, money, love, happiness and friendship can all be acquired through magick, and ethically at that. Wiccans do not believe in casting spells to cause harm to another, and we explicitly believe in the Law of Threefold Return, which greatly discourages harmful or controlling hexes to be cast by Wiccans, something that doesn't seem to bother the practitioners of magick in the shows and the films (the Law of Threefold Return is described in detail in its own section elsewhere on this site). For example, Wiccans will not place curses on people, or use those ever famous love spells to win the love of a specific person against his or her will. However, to answer a very popular question about the use of magick, Wiccans can use spellwork very effectively in self-defense, but all such spells will be defensive, not offensive. We will cast a binding to prevent someone from hurting us, such as simply deterring them from doing so, or to deflect another person's intended harm back on them; these bindings aren't even carried out unless our adversary willingly chooses to harm us in an unjust manner. Responsible Wiccans will never cast such spells unless it is absolutely justifiable and we in no way knowingly incited the problem with the other person, as our ethics forbid us to abuse magick by using it for petty revenge, or to annoy or hurt people who we dislike or who bother us in minor ways (the Law of Threefold Return is a further incentive to not abuse magick). However, it is perhaps important to point out that Wiccans are not pacifists or easy victims by any means, and we are certainly not door mats when it comes to protecting ourselves and our loved ones from unjust attacks, either physically or by spellwork. However, if we do deem it necessary to cast spells for protection, such spells are used only with great caution, and are generally only performed in emergencies. In conclusion, those aforementioned TV shows and films do nothing to teach people the reality of the Wiccan religion or the practice of Witchcraft, and should be considered as works of pure fantasy by those who choose to watch them. How old is Wicca? Some witches claim to be part of hereditary covens that can trace its lineage back for centuries. Paganism itself, and the tenets under which most Wiccans practice, do indeed go back for millennia, even as far back as the dawn of the human species. However, thanks to the bloody one-two blows of the Crusades and the Inquisition, both of which were initiated by the Roman Catholic Church, the Pagans became effectively extinct from world affairs for several centuries. The Crusades, which occurred from roughly the 11th to 13th centuries, was an event in which Christian knights and missionaries forcibly converted the majority of Pagans to Christianity through brutal violence and warfare, and wiped out the several great Pagan cultures that existed at the time in the Western and Northern world, thus eliminating most of their beliefs, culture, literature and philosophy from the global arena, only to later re-write these things from a Christian viewpoint. The Inquisition, which ensued from the late 15th to mid-17th centuries, and which modern Pagans refer to as "The Burning Times," officially made Paganism illegal under Catholic theocratic law and people caught or simply even accused of practicing Witchcraft (usually the latter; allmagick was incorrectly referred to as "Witchcraft" by the Christian authorities at the time, a mistake that continues even today) were subject to punishment consisting of brutally sadistic methods of torture and death via being burned at the stake (and sometimes by hanging or further torture), and this caveat drove the small and scattered remaining segments of Paganism so deeply into hiding that they effectively vanished from public awareness, and created the numerous vicious stereotypes against Paganism that insured that they remained in "permanent" hiding even after the laws against Witchcraft were repealed. Thus, thanks to the latter two "holocaust" events, Paganism was more or less successfully wiped out of existence until its re-emergence in the mid-20th century (for more details on this, see the History of Paganism and Wicca section elsewhere on this site). This was after the two opposing religious factions co-existed, often less then peacefully, all through the Dark Ages and Middle Ages. Strictly speaking, Wicca is a modernversion of an ancient religion that was first mentioned in Gerald Gardner's 1954 book Witchcraft Today. It grew immensely during the occult explosion of the 1960's to the present. There is no hard evidence that any coven or tradition of Witchcraft survived the Inquisition and continued to secretly exist in a hereditary fashion for centuries to the present day, despite certain scholarly claims made by Dr. Margaret Murray in her 1921 book The Witch Cult in Western Europe, and similar claims made by Gardner himself in his books on the subject (not to mention several other witches). Hence, all Wiccan traditions are basically new religions that are modern re-creations of the "old" Pagan tenets and traditions, but our contemporary ritual structure has also been influenced heavily from Ceremonial Magick from the Middle Ages (such as our usage of the Five Elements and the casting of a circle of power, as well as the usage of the pentagram, which is a universal mystical symbol of protection in magick). Further, our adoption of the belief in karma, which is expressed by us as the Wiccan Law of Threefold Return, is largely culled from Eastern sources, such as Buddhism and Hinduism. As a result, all Wiccans are often referred to as Neo-Pagans for this reason (i.e., “new" Pagans). Thus, in short, Wicca is a new religion based on very old religious and magickal traditions, which borrows some elements from elsewhere. If Wicca has no connection to Satanism, then why do Wiccans wear a "Satanic" icon like the pentagram as the symbol of their religious beliefs? This question or statement is one of the most blatant displays of ignorance that Wiccans are routinely subjected to, and people who ask this question are suffering from a total lack of knowledge about the history of this ancient magickal symbol, perpetuated by an irresponsible media. The pentagram is a very old magickal symbol that has been used by ancient Pagans, Ceremonial Magicians and even by early Christians (who later abandoned the use of this symbol) during the Dark and Middle Ages. It has symbolized protection from evil and utilized as a means of summoning and controlling magickal energy, and also symbolizes the element of earth to modern witches and magicians during ritual (the other three commonly known elements of antiquity are fire, symbolized by the sword, water, symbolized by the cup and air, symbolized by the wand; the fifth, less commonly known, element is spirit, which is often symbolized by the altar itself in ritual). When not used in ritual, the five points of the pentagram represent each of the five elements of antiquity used by ancient magicians (most of whom belong to a minority Jewish sect of worship, and call upon the Jewish conception of Deity in Hebrew, but can actually be of any religion) as well as by modern Wiccans, with the top point representing the element of spirit, the dominant magickal element in the universe from which the other four are derived. To the early Christians, the five points of the pentagram represented the five wounds of Jesus Christ that the latter received during his crucifixion. Several ritual elements of Wicca, including the use of the pentagram (which has become the pentacle with the addition of a disk surrounding the symbol), have been borrowed from Ceremonial Magick, due to the proven efficiency of such symbols and techniques in directing magick effectively. Also, in modern Norse Wicca, the pentagram is the personal symbol of the goddess Freya (those of the Asatru religion do not use the pentagram at all in their rituals, and have instead adopted the Hammer of Thor as their symbol, which resembles an upside down upper case letter 'T'). The pentagram disappeared from popular consciousness by roughly the 15th century, since the practice of magick was very much on the decline due to intense pressure by the Roman Catholic Church, and the Inquisition effectively drove all of the few remaining practitioners of the mystic arts, whether Pagan or otherwise, very deeply into hiding. When Ceremonial Magick began slowly returning in the late 19th and early 20th centuries with the formation of such magickal (albeit non-Pagan) sects as the relatively short-lived but extremely influential Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn (many of their magickal practices and teachings are still in use by magicians, and even Wiccans, to this day), and also due to the appearance of such colorful practitioners of the mystic arts such as the infamous and misunderstood Aleister Crowley [who had no direct connection to either Wicca or Satanism, and in fact his illustrious career predated each of them, despite incorrect references in the past claiming otherwise, though his work certainly influenced the New Age movement of the late 20th century, which spawned both of these very disparate religions], symbols like the pentagram slowly began to be utilized again, although the general public wasn't largely made aware of this. Wiccans have used the upright version of the pentagram known as the pentacle (surrounded by a disk) since the religion's earliest days in the public eye during the 50's, and utilized it for the same magickal purposes as the Ceremonial Magicians did, as well as declaring it the official magickal symbol of this new version of the "old" religion. However, this was hardly noticed by the press in England, let alone America, as books on Wicca didn't start hitting the U.S. in significant numbers until the late 60's, during the same time that Satanism was conceived and making headlines, and the "old" religion didn't get any coverage in the mainstream media as Anton LeVay's brainchild did. Thus, when Satanism was formed by Anton LeVay in the New Age explosion of the 60's, he coveted the previously very rarely used inverted version of the pentagram to symbolize his religion and added the face of the goat-headed god-form Baphomet to the symbol. Due to the popular coverage of the early days of Satanism in the press of the time, the image of the pentagram has been connected to Satanism and black magick in the eyes of the general public for the past thirty years or so, who assumes that Satanism, which the public mistakenly connects to the fictitious Satanic cults who supposedly murdered children and virgins, had originated and always used the pentagram as their symbol, and that the pentagram is the symbol of Satan himself (actually, as described above, true Satanists don't even believe in Satan as a sentient being of absolute evil as the Christians do, but simply as a non-living symbolic principle representing the human ego). In reality, the pentagram has never had anything whatsoever to do with the Judeo-Christian conception of Satan, and amazingly, a connection between the pentagram and Satan wasn't even claimed by the Roman Catholic Church during the Inquisition, but is strictly an assumption of the American general public that began as recently as the late 1960's; hence, this belief didn't even exist one century ago, let alone for millennia, which shows how ridiculous this notion is! Hence, a symbol that has existed as a universal icon of magick by mystics for many centuries has been perverted a mere thirty years ago by assumptions of the public based on press reports concerning the appearance of Satanism and its usage of an inverted pentagram (Anton LeVay actually became quite a media darling as a result, attracted the attention of several movie stars interested in his religion and even won a brief role as an evil priest in the horror film Rosemary's Baby, one of several such films made at the time to exploit the renewed Christian fear of their conception of Satan; thus, ironically, Satanism has actually been given more respect and credibility in the past then Paganism has in the present). The pentagram has never had any connection whatsoever to Satan in the past centuries, and actually represents protection from evil, not adherence to it. Curiously, during the early 1940's the pentagram was similarly misused in the classic Universal horror film The Wolfman, which utilized the symbol to represent werewolves (Lon Chaney Jr.'s character, Larry Talbot, would precognitively see the symbol appear on the hand of his next victim), despite the fact that the symbol has never had anything whatsoever to do with lycanthropy. The symbol was misused again in a very similar manner in the USA network's early 1990's horror film Werewolf, as well as the short-lived TV series spun off from it (the title character saw a bloody pentagram on his hand which indicated he would transform into his hairy alter ego that evening, which shows how little things have changed over the decades). These things no doubt help cement the incorrect idea in the general public's mind that the pentagram was and is a symbol of evil. In fact, Satanists also use an inverted version of the Christian cross as a symbol, yet this fact has mysteriously gotten very little mention in the American media. However, since the cross is a well-known Christian religious symbol in American society, unlike the pentagram, it didn't get reported, much less denigrated, as a result of its perverted usage by the Satanists. The swastika is another ancient mystical symbol that has been terribly denigrated in the modern world, since most people very incorrectly believe that the altered version of this very old symbol used as the national icon by Adolph Hitler for Nazi Germany was the exclusive creation of the infamous leader to symbolize Nazism, and, sadly, modern Neo-Nazis continue to use the symbol to represent their racist social and political beliefs, thereby continuing to pervert its original meaning. The symbol was originally used to represent the sun, and as a magickal ritual symbol to attract or repel various forces, and was never associated with any political or racial ideology. Further, this symbol has been used by many different cultures in the past, from the Tibetans, the Native Americans, the Japanese and the Greeks, among others. However, despite the symbol's very long history, almost everyone in modern America who see the swastika is simply disgusted by the symbol, and have absolutely no idea of the original mystical meaning of this ancient Norse/Germanic symbol, once commonly referred to as the "Hammer of Thor" by the followers of the Norse religion, and considered sacred to the legendary god of thunder (but is not to be confused with the Hammer of Thor symbol more commonly used by Asatruar and Norse Wiccans today, which is described above). The Germanic origin of the swastika has also been used by various Christian groups to unjustly attempt to connect modern practitioners of the Norse religion, such as Asatru, to Nazism and racial supremacist ideals, not realizing that the usage of the original version of the swastika by their Germanic ancestors in the distant past (which was the reason Hitler used it) had nothing to do with the current non-religious political ideas associated with the symbol by the public (as a result, the current Norse religions have, for the most part, dropped the use of this ancient mystical symbol). The Norse author Freya Aswynn has attempted to restore the unjustly tarnished image of the swastika, stating "The swastika is one of the most potent signs in the collective human experience, and it is high time that this sign regained its rightful place and was redeemed from its negative implications." Obviously, modern Pagans and other members of the New Age movement still have many stereotypes to overcome due to public ignorance of these basic facts. Do Wiccans believe in an afterlife? And what exactly do Wiccans believe concerning reincarnation and the fate of the soul after death? Yes, Wiccans absolutely believe in an afterlife. Wiccans believe in a beautiful afterlife realm commonly referred to as Summerland due to its beauteous astral landscape that conveys the appearance of perpetual summer to its temporary inhabitants. Since Wiccan theology believes heavily in reincarnation as a necessary means of evolving the soul, Summerland is basically an astral "resting place," or way station, for souls in between physical incarnations, where they have time to not only rest, but also to reflect on both the triumphs and failures of the previous life, as well as evaluate the level of their success and plan the circumstances of the next life. Some Wiccans have suggested that Summerland may be the same place as Avalon (sometimes called Otherworld) both the home of the gods and the afterlife realm in Celtic mythology, and there are some similarities between the two realms. How "long" an individual remains in the Summerland (since time probably has a completely different meaning there then on the physical plane) most likely varies, depending on various factors, such as how close to "perfection" the soul is, or how many lives he/she has so far led, what type of life experiences he/she endured on the physical plane, how successfully they accomplished what they set out to do in this respective incarnation, and probably other factors as well. It has been stated in Wiccan belief that at least some souls, as part of their spiritual evolution, spend time in the "interlife" experience assisting a different soul in physical form through their life experience; such souls are often called "spirit guides" by New Agers, and it is believed by some that everyone in physical form has such an unseen "mentor" (Christians believe in such beings as well, and commonly refer to them as "guardian angels"). Otherwise, souls spend their time in the "interlife" period doing various activities that interest him/her, such as studying, socializing with other spirits, visiting other astral realms, or anything else he/she wants to do in the interim. It is believed by Wiccans, in a manner similar to that of Buddhists and Hindus, that the soul goes through numerous different lives, each with different experiences and obstacles to overcome, depending on different experiences and knowledge that the soul needs to acquire in order to achieve eventual spiritual perfection (a state that the Buddhists refer to as Nirvana), and the person will incarnate within a life with the basic framework of circumstances and obstacles set up for him/her to experience, though we believe that free will is a very real and important concept, and that the individual is free to make their own choices as to how they will deal with these experiences, and the choices they make will obviously affect both the range and the severity of the experiences they will face. Should a soul fail to overcome a certain needed experience or obstacle, or fail to learn required knowledge, they will have another go at it during another life, and will keep doing so until they are successful. There is no set number of lives for a soul to achieve this perfection, as he/she has all eternity to do so, and the number of physical lives an individual soul will experience obviously varies greatly with the individual. It is also believed by many that each time a physical incarnation dies and the soul returns to the afterlife realm, if he/she has learned and evolved significantly, he/she will move on to a "higher" realm, each time coming closer to the One, the source of all life and creator of souls in the universe, until that individual achieves the state of perfection. Once the state of Nirvana is finally achieved, the soul is believed to forever "escape" the cycle of reincarnation, having learned all it needs to learn and experienced all it needs to experience to achieve spiritual perfection, and the soul is then believed to merge back with the spiritual life force of the universe (sometimes referred to as the One or All by Pagans, which manifests itself into two distinct universal genders as the God and Goddess in Wiccan belief), where the soul's accumulated knowledge and experience through numerous lifetimes will be shared with the collective life force of the universe for the benefit of its growth as well. What exactly happens to a soul after this happens, such as what level of "individuality" he/she will retain (the soul at its core is genderless, so it may no longer have a distinct gender identity at this point any more, yet can probably still manifest itself as such, since the One can do so as the Goddess and God), though achieving this "oneness with the universe" is said to be the goal of each and every soul. Whether or not souls routinely change genders is a matter of much conjecture. Although souls are truly genderless at their core, and probably can and do change genders when the life experience truly needs it, much past life regression techniques seem to suggest that most souls appear to have a preference for usually incarnating into a specific gender, with more souls preferring to manifest as females. Thus, souls may indeed be "predisposed" to usually manifest as the same gender. It is also a matter of conjecture whether souls meet reincarnations of people that they loved in a past life; much evidence seems to suggest that they do, and that souls may actually exist in spiritual "family units" who are connected to each other in various ways throughout each and every lifetime. Most Wiccans do not believe in an afterlife of brutal punishment as the Christians do with their "Hell," which was probably originally conceived as a political means of terrifying the masses into accepting the new religion and to follow the dogma written by the ruling hierarchy, and to not challenge their authority [ironically, however, since the astral plane is infinite in the diversity of its realms, and since it is very fluid and responds to strong human beliefs, an astral reality resembling the Christian conception of "Hell" may very well have actually been created by nearly two millennia of heavy Christian belief in such a realm, but it is believed to be exceedingly difficult to actually get stuck in this fiery reality, and only then by strong adherents to Christian dogma who strongly believe, at least subconsciously, that they will end up there, but probably even then they will not be trapped there permanently; experts who have performed past life regression studies, psychics who can naturally perceive the afterlife realms and experts who have studied those who have been briefly declared clinically dead and made short visits to the afterlife realities, have very rarely reported such a realm as the Judeo-Christian "Hell," and even when they did they often felt that the individual reporting it personally created such an experience due to a deep-rooted fear of ending up in "Hell" for the most trivial of reasons that the Christian mindset has imposed upon us, such as not going to Church often enough, not accepting Jesus Christ as their "savior" or committing too many "sins"; thus Hell itself may actually be more a state of mind then an actual realm of existence, though it can probably exist as the latter at various times if enough people believe this to be the case]. Rather then a belief in Hell, Wiccans, like the Eastern religions, believe in the principle of karma (further described in the section on the Wiccan Rede), that has been described as a cosmic form of points earned for and against the soul. If one lives a life of cruelty and debauchery, they will build negative karma against themselves, and will have negative events, possibly magnified in nature, reflect back on them in either this lifetime, or possibly have to make up for such "evil" actions by living their next life fraught with negative experiences, and have to somehow make up for their past negative acts with positive acts, and even being forced to help individuals whom they injured in some way in a past life. Hence, Wiccans do indeed believe in a form of retribution for "evil" acts, but just not in a form of eternal punishment in a horrific netherworld. A small minority of Wiccans, however (among them, Wiccan author A.J. Drew), do indeed believe in a negative astral realm for Wiccans who may be exceptionally wicked, and the realm is sometimes referred to as Winterland (which is presumably perceived by its unfortunate inhabitants as a barren and perpetually cold and frozen realm, much like Niflheim, the realm of the dishonored dead in Norse mythology ruled by the goddess Hela, and it may indeed be the same place as Winterland, or a near astral equivalent). Most Wiccans do not seem to believe in Winterland, though it may indeed exist, but even the believers suggest it is populated only by individuals of our faith who were exceptionally cruel and wicked without remorse of any kind, and not for minor or silly reasons such as not believing in a specific set of dogma or proclaiming a certain individual as their personal "savior" (as many Christians would have us believe). Even then, it is probable that such souls wouldn't be condemned to spend all eternity in this Winterland, but would have ample opportunity to redeem themselves, but it would be a difficult road ahead to do so. The Wiccan realm of Summerland is believed to be a different astral realm then that known as Heaven by Judeo-Christian theology. Is it true that Wiccans don't believe in God? This question really annoys me, as it displays how much the Christians have altered the word "Pagan" so that it is synonymous with the word "atheist." Yes, Pagans believe in a sentient creator-force in the universe. However, unlike the three major patriarchal religious tendencies in the world today, we do not believe in an all-male Deity. We believe in a God and Goddess, and some Pagan religions, like Asatru, and even many Wiccans, believe in several deities. So, yes, Wiccans do believe, very strongly in fact, in Deity. There are indeed individuals who do not believe in any conception of Deity, or adhere to any religious doctrine, and they are called atheists. Pagans do believe in Deity, just not the same conceptual interpretation of it as do the three major monotheistic religions in the world today. No more confusion here, please. http://www.angelfire.com/ny2/wiccan/WiccaFAQ.html

Here is my Byron Katie work if it helps: can i know that im trapped in reincarnation? not really how does it make me feel? disturbed who would i be without this thought? mildly better flip it: I look foward to being trapped in reincarnation My mind is in reincarnation only can i know that im stuck here forever? no how does it make me feel? disturbed who would i be without this thought? happy flip it: im free here forever I'm trapped only in my mind how does the thought that this is hell make me feel? bad who would i be without this thought? in heaven flip it: I look foward to being trapped in this hell I want to be trapped in this hell I want to be trapped in this heaven It's only hell in my mind

I want to escape reincarnation. I don't want to be stuck here; I want to escape this hell.

the buddha taught something highly desired among serious spiritual seekers during his lifetime. he did teach about causation, explaining the mechanics of what people called "reincarnation", even though he said that no separated entity reincarnates. he did teach about the mechanics of the experience of Reality, trying to explain the flaw behind the matter/spirit duality that was very popular. but the most important part of his teachings was the path to experience enlightenment without the need for beliefs. there was no joke involved. very very slow now. the buddha taught about letting go of egoic desires so that you could finally be serious about investigating yourself. there's nothing wrong with creating a meaning for yourself. the mistake lies behind believing that there is a fundamental meaning and suffering because of that. during his last minutes, he asks vehemently if anyone had any final question for him. nobody had the courage to ask him anything at that moment and then he died. you see... he was actually very concerned about his teachings because he was aware of how deep in the human "mindsphere" they would penetrate. that's why we still benefit from them 2600 years after his death. he understood causation thus he could comprehend the karma of his wisdom. it does have a cosmic value. but aja, we're too small in the universe! it depends! if we zoom out, we're infinitely insignificant. but if we zoom in, we're infinitely colossal!

There is no life after death folks. There is no reincarnation. Is here and now, having a long lifespan is not egoic, is the opposite. Do not confuse EGO with the body. EGO is within the body but the body is not the EGO. The body is the awareness we all talk about. No body, no awareness of the self. When you say: "I will identify with X or Y", the identification feeling or being is the whole body at work. Mainstream spirituality is just that, a more open-minded Christian version of thought. The non-duality paradigm on today's explanation on the matter is usually limited. Immortality is a perfect balance within the energetical system centers of the body, is a transcendence from childhood into Buddhahood. Adulthood is a curse at the same time a natural course on the level of planetary vibration. We, humans, are like this planet, we need to transcend the earth influence of the cycle of death and rebirth in order to transcend. Transcend into what you might ask; into infinite physical/non-physical growth. Stop being a follower is the start. Begin to reconnect the attention and focus on the being that you are. There is no enlightenment outside the body, period!

@ThrowAway Ian Stevenson studied this topic extensively and released his findings. The study indicated that reincarnation is most likely true. If you google it, you can find more information.

You mentioned it before in another thread but I was hoping for more elaboration. It's funny how before I began doing self inquiry exercises (as per Ramana Maharshi) I really did believe that ego death was possible. I guess it was hope but of course after having some samadhi experiences, I took it more seriously. I don't think the idea of reincarnation is wacky or unbelievable. It really makes sense but I would like to know if it's possible to know if it's true or not. I suppose an important question to ask is why is the answer important to know? I know Buddha is reported to have told devotees inquiring about if God was real or not to not waste their time on things they will never be able to prove true. Those who achieve enlightenment may have different interpretations of it (God-Realization or End of Suffering) but they will know/experience the ultimate truth, that we are not the body nor the mind, but instead the witness (pure consciousness). If I was to never know if reincarnation was real or not, I would still pursue my spiritual path. But if I was to find out it was true, I feel like I would make more progress surrendering. Thank you.

Skip to 7:30 mark, a woman asks about reincarnation.

@CreamCat You will care about equality more when you realize that you will reincarnate as every living being who ever lived or will live. That will sober the smugness out of ya. @Leo Gura Leo, both vedantic and buddhist concepts of reincarnation make sense to me but did you experience something that proves reincarnation is real? If so what yogic method did you use? Or is this statement made on faith? I could care less for siddhis but if I was able to experience that reincarnation is in fact real (just like how an individual has to experience "God" for themselves), that would help me surrender to life much more than I already do now. Edit: Sorry for the typos and double copy/paste. I'm a new user to the forum

That makes me want to puke. The thought of becoming my parents' dog that was killed in a car accident is sickening. Perhaps, this reincarnation thing is not serial but infinitely parallel. Think of an infinitely parallel processor. Why do you think I will be reincarnated as a dog or something else after I physically die? I might be being reincarnated millions of times even now. I want to be reincarnated as the overseer of reality or some sort of creature with god-like power. I want to taste godhood of some sort. This human life doesn't really feel like godhood. I want to know the reach of godhood. I want to make a house appear out of nothing.

"this is the only way out of this endless hell in which consciousness keeps changing forms forever" What exactly is this endless hell you're talking about? There is no way out of consciousness and its manifestation. Reincarnation doesn't exactly conflict with the one life idea. Being born in another life is just another manifestation of consciousness. Motivation for the current corporeal form you have ultimately comes from an innate desire to make use of it. Its about living in the present and using the potential "future" to morph your present into what you want.

Hi Leo, Just a thought. Are you not short selling the concept of becoming a sage or getting enlightened etc. by sticking to "one life" concept? I understand that if this world is an illusion then so is life and death from that angle. But is "getting best out of rest of the life" enough reason to motivate individuals to start this tough journey when next breath one takes could be the last one? Do not you think putting this in some other way like “this is the only way out of this endless hell in which consciousness keeps changing forms forever” may be more motivational? In this case it doesn’t matter how old one is or how long one will live in this body, this journey of self-realization has to be started at some point as there is no other way out of it. And if self-realization is not attained in this life then it will continue in next life form without losing the hard work from previous life. I know no one can claim the truth of this concept but hey this can motivate even if someone is at the deathbed. Yes, actualize.org has lot of similarities to Sikhism. But reincarnation is the central theme in Sikhism like most other eastern religions. Hell is coming back into forms and merging back with the source is the Heaven. I'll really appreciate your response to this post. Thank You.

What say ye, o' wise ones? Speculation and total BS 100% allowed.

I know good and bad are just meaning that are attached, but are you life events still happening for a reason? This goes more into stuff like reincarnation. Does anybody here know more about it?

So this is a report about 10-day retreat in a vipassana center near Moscow, Russia. I am 20 years old guy from Moscow interested in self-actualization work. Got Into self-develeopment around 2.5 years ago. Got into meditation and installed my daily meditation habit 1 year ago. First discovered spiritual domain of self-development half year ago. Trying to figure out my life purpose now and advance in spiritual work. I have many insights in this report. It's not that I got all of them for the first time in my life. I was getting some of them before but now I was deepening my understanding and realizing the ideas on a much more profound level. One day before 1 day before the retreat I told my family where I am going and they got very suspicious about my endeavor. They didn't know that I'm into consciousness work and that I already have 1 year of daily meditation habit under my belt, so for them it was a surprise. They tried very hard to talk me out of this using all kinds of crazy justifications. They'd tell that this is just a sect, that they would take my money and everything, that it is "the devil's worshipping", they would tell scary stories about their own experience with sects in their youth and say that I wouldn't tolerate such strict schedule. The force of Homeostasis felt very real. I knew I was shaking a boat but at that point I didn’t care, deep down I knew I'm doing the right thing. But still, this situation with family made me suffer emotionally Day 0 I arrived at train station and according to guide I needed to walk for like 20 minutes by foot to enter that center. During this walk I had to face all my doubts. I was telling myself things like "Wtf I'm even doing, searching for something unknown in a wild russian forest and I don't even know if they will take me or not (I was in a waiting list, so i had no guarantees)". But it also felt somewhat romantic to me, it felt like an adventure and it really was one. I had the strong feeling that most precious and meaningful things in life are exactly like this - in order to get\find them you have to travel to the end of the world and seek for them in some deep russian forest without any certainty, having only the faith in what you do, in yourself. I finally found the center, it looked like a summer camp. I entered and saw some girls walking around in a very tranquil and chill manner. I approached one and asked her where can I find the registration place. She looked at me and holyshit, I was amazed by her very soft, gentle and open gaze, it felt like she was completely "in a present moment", she felt so "free", it was amazing, . I knew for sure that she was meditating on a daily basis. Also from that moment on I knew I found "the right place", I found this "gem" I was looking for. She gladly showed me the way to the kitchen. When I was approaching the kitchen I saw the group of people and the very tall (over 2m) guy, who was talking about the point of meditation in a little bit preachy manner, that thing amazed me too, I was starting to have a paradigm shift, I've never ever saw someone discussing meditation in real life. Also all these people seemed to be stage green in "Spiral Dynamics" and I was happy as fuck about that as I was struggling to meet green people in my ordinary life. I finally got into registration place. I got lucky and there was an open slot for me as some guy didn't come to the course. They assigned a bed and a safe to me. I had to lock all electronics\writing devices\all intellectual stuff in a safe. At first I was a little bit hesitant to put everything I had (ID, money, etc) into it but the safe keeper lady assured me that it is better to leave everything here so you don't have to worry about someone stealing your shit. I agreed with her. I sneaked a journal and a pen which was against the rules but I felt like I really needed it. They showed me to my room, I had 3 more people living in a room with me. I acclimated to a room a little bit and went to a general meeting. On that meeting they told us about the structure of our retreat and introduced us to schedule. They explained that vipassana was originally kept as monk only tradition but in last century it started to get unfolded to common people via these centers thanks to Goenka. Since it is a monk tradition we were supposed to live the monk lifestyle for 10 days.The schedule was such that we would wake up at 4 am, meditate for 10-11 hours each day with some breaks for rest and eating. Some of these hours allowed meditation inside your own room, other hours were strictly At night we would have a 1.5h lecture and we were supposed to go to sleep at 9-9.30 pm. The first lecture was today. On that lecture they told us a little bit about what is vipasana, told the rules and introduced to the meditation technique called "anapana". Basically it is focusing on breath. We were supposed to practice it all day tomorrow. Also there was kinda an "initiation" process. We had to vow that we would follow 5 rules: 1. Noble silence (no speaking to other students until 10th day) 2. No stealing 3. No sexual stuff 4. No lying 5. No intoxicans So called "old students" had to vow for 3 more: 6. Fasting after midday 7. Not to wear fancy things (jewelry, etc) 8. To not sleep on high and luxurious beds (I think all beds were the same tho) After that we went to sleep, noble silence began. Even though it was prohibited to journal I felt the need be a little bit flexible with this particular rule, so I journaled a little bit from time to time. It backfired a bit on my meditation practice as journaling triggers the thinking mind, but not that much. The value of keeping a journal and writing insights far outweighed "the losses". As expected, had trouble getting asleep first night, I wasn't in a mood to sleep at all. I've read on some forum that on a retreat like this you will "remember everything", so I reasoned why not start doing it now. I remembered my last intimate relationship in a lot of details, analyzed everything, found more egoic patterns from my side. Day 1 I ended up sleeping for only 1h. Despite sleeping for only 1h I didn't want to sleep at all whole day. So we woke up from a gong sound, did grooming stuff and went to a meditation hall. The hall was separated by 2 parts - for women and men. There were exactly 100 meditation mats. There was also a huge basket with a ton of different pillows, meditation benches and plaids and we could take them. Everyone and I started quite modestly with this stuff but later we started to experiment with all that building huge castles and temples from cushions. It was actually pretty funny to observe. But everyone kinda chilled near days 3-4 and a lot of people went minimalistic mode with that (me too, I was only using 4 cushions, haha). We proceeded to meditation. On a first day we were given a breath concentration technique, nothing fancy, the main struggle was that in ordinary life I would do meditation for 30 minutes~ and sometimes maybe more and there I had to sit for 2 hours straight. Each day we had new modifications to techniques. It was very hard for me at first but I got accustomed after a while. My main strategy and goal with this retreat was to contemplate about my life, life in general and life purpose. So that is what I was doing during break times. My contemplations proceeded in meditation sessions to some extent and the thinking mind was crazy during them. Regarding eating: we had a very nice vegetarian cousin with bits of dairy but usually you could avoid it easily if you wanted to. There was a shit ton of different species and teas to choose from. Some of them were ordinary teas (with caffeine), but there were also a lot of herbal teas aswell, I really indulged on those. Also there were different jam's and honey for satisfying a sweet tooth. I tried to avoid gluten and dairy but after a while my skin got really sloppy and unhealthy look from lack of protein, I was basically eating 10-20 grams of protein per day (and usually I eat around 100-200) so I had to include these to get at least SOME protein. It helped. I learned what granola is, loved it! I totally avoided caffeine, all bread and all sugar containing products. To satisfy a sweet tooth I used honey. I tried to limit my food intake and to not eat too much. I often times fasted after midday.We had a guru who was meditating in meditation hall with us teaching us the technique. We could speak to him privately after a lunch time. I hoped to see some stage turquoise person, a real enlightenment master but as it turned out, this guru wasn't enlightenment. He looked like an ordinary human without any crazy "guru attributes". But nonetheless he was pretty wise, compassionate and it felt like his ego was greatly numbed. He was from India and had a pretty good English. There were special people who would translate Russian-English for you if you needed it. But these translators were not the best, sometimes they would mess up a translation so guru wouldn't understand all subtleties and would be forced to give a generic answer. I spoke to him in English only because I could. I abstained from speaking to him on the first day since I slept only for 1h but after day #1 I spoke to him nearly everyday. The first day was pretty intense for me, I got to my bed and had troubles getting asleep again. They say it is normal. Day 2 Slept for 5 hours. Had sleepiness throughout the day. This day I spoke to guru. Told him about my life situation and my goals for this retreat and asked some questions regarding technique. He told me to stop forcing thinking and strategizing during my rest hours and entrench in mindfulness instead and if the thoughts come - let them come, accept them, all strategizing should be delayed to the end of the course. Also I asked him some questions about enlightenment but he parried those and said he would answer everything in the end and now I shouldn't worry about it and focus on my practice. At first I kinda resisted his advice but then decided to follow it. Because I was no longer forcing myself to think too much I had the best meditation gains in my life. My concentration ability literally skyrocketed and I was able to stay focused for a very long time. It was still hard tho, physically and emotionally. I suffered. But it was a good kind of suffering! The kind of suffering that grows you. I came up with an insight that sometimes in life you gotta suffer just to get the opportunity to get the right kind of suffering you need. Also during this day I've got a lot of insights on leadership. I noticed how all amazing stuff in life happens through Leadership. Leadership is literally everything and Leadership is fundamental to happiness. You can't just sit on your ass and expect that status quo will be changed to your benefit in some magic way. You have to destroy status quo yourself, you have to go and carve your path through a wild Russian forest with machete to find a vipassana retreat if you need to. Of course the prime and most important leadership is self-leadership, everything starts with it. But there are shit tons of other types of leaderships. Leadership in relationships with friends, in intimate relationships, in social groups, in your workplace, in your busyness. If you want to make something happen or build something that you want (it can be a certain relationship or busyness or anything else) you HAVE to take initiative and DO STUFF. I was also continuing to have a paradigm shift from environment. Everyone in this camp meditated with me and I started to notice how this all was becoming NORMAL to me. I noticed the power of perspective. I also noticed how my parents ruined their lives by staying in comfort and being afraid to go see things and collect different perspectives. They stay in their own little bubble and demonize everything that is not inside it. Some meditation retreat - "Must be a devil worshipping. Don't go there! They will kill you and steal everything from you!". But of course in reality people on these retreat turned out to be one of the most kind and nice people I've seen in my entire life. On lectures they speak about basic Buddhist concepts in a very soft manner. There is some indoctrination of course and they make a big emphasis on ethics and morals but there was close to 0 dogma. They didn't ask to believe in karma, reincarnation and other shit, they were trying to teach the pure teaching of Buddha without bullshit. Also they stress independent thinking and first hand experience very much which is quite cool. Also I go the wibe that this course is designed for common people. Not in terms that it is not hardcore. It is pretty hardcore. But it is basically designed to make common people more happy, to set them on spiritual path, to show them the way. They don't stress epistemic and metaphysical truth seeking at all. Day 3 My sleeping patterns became better from this day and I was sleeping 5-6 hours per day consistently (usuallly I sleep 8). We were still using focusing on breath meditation technique but everyday we were kinda "narrowing" our "area of focus". They say it is supposed to sharpen the mind. Meditation schedule was intense, was hard but I was managing. I felt like my presence and mindfulness increased with each day. Was thinking about one close ex-friend of mine who was really insecure and unconscious and it triggered me emotionally big time so it fucked up few hours of meditation due to nonstop thinking mind. I thought about what people I want to befriend and what to avoid a lot. Got an insight that the more profound and amazing the thing in life is the more nicely it is hidden. Sometimes it is in reverse but it usually takes a huge awareness to notice this thing so it still remains hidden for an ordinary eye. Also, damn, everyday I was looking at these girls. The girls that were meditating 10 hours day. I just fell in love. It was so amazing to see, especially contrasting them with "ordinary" girls you see in a conventional society who chase all kinds of petty stuff. Today on lecture they talked about enlightenment. They represented it as a state of seeing things totally as they are, the direct experience of universe and connected it to quantum mechanics and string theory. The quoted Buddhas words how he was seeing the world as little vibrations and waves 2500 years ago. They also try to teach epistemology which is super nice. They make a clear distinction between Belief, Intellectual understanding and direct experience of a phenomena stressing that the latter is the best way to learn and see the world. Enlightenment - first hand direct experience of a universe. I agree that first hand experience is the most trustworthy thing that we have and it certainly possible to experience the reality first handedly through awareness. But how can we trust the direct experience? How can we be sure that even a direct experience is 100% correct? How can we be sure that the Truth of enlightenment, so called "ultimate truth" is truly ultimate? That kept me wondering and I realized there is probably a lot more stuff beyond enlightenment to comprehend and realize but enlightenment still is worth pursuing because seems like it gives you an objective picture of our given reality. Who knows what is beyond our reality and what reality truly is. Day 4 On this day we finally moved past the breathing technique and began the actual Vipassana. They were talking about Equanimity A LOT this day and next days and I myself really fell in love with this concept. What equanimity basically is is staying emotionally untouched by the occurring phenomena, uncreativeness. Finally got introduced to vipassana technique. The technique of vipassana is observing the body in a certain manner, trying to feel the sensation in each part of your body and staying unreactive to pleasant\unpleasant\blank sensations, fully detached emotionally. They have a whole theory on how our body reacts to your emotional swings and the ability to control your emotions lies in mastering the skill to ignore and detach from the body reaction. All phenomena is impermanent, raising and passing away! That day we were introduced to Strong Determination Sitting and from this now on we had to do it for 1h 3 times per day!!!. For those who don't know what SDS is, it is basically sitting for a set amount of time without changing your posture, moving as less as possible. That was challenging! Of course, if the things went too south we were able to move and adjust but we were highly encouraged to do it as little as possible and preferably never at all. It was the hardest days of all for me because of SDS. Later it got easier. On a lecture they were talking a lot about equanimity and cause and effect topic. Basically about how we are fucking up our lives by our reactiveness and shitty mindsets. They kinda introduced us to context vs content concept. All situations are dependant on context and what really important is your intent, what you mean to do on your mental level. The content, i.e. what you speak and what you do, your "action" - doesn't matter that much. Everything starts from consciousness.They teach that all suffering comes from our reactiveness to a phenomena, from lack of equanimity, from not perceiving reality objectively as it is, which is quite true. And we were meant to receive a direct experience of this truth and also the truth of impermanent nature of the universe. All phenomena (everything!) has a property of arising and passing away. And holyshit, I've received a shit ton of direct experience of this! You better believe me. After some time I had a thought "damn, I imagine what would happen if I could receive a pickup training with such intensity" Day 5 That day everyone seemed so chill calm and me too… True spirituality is about observing reality objectively as it is , not as we want it to be. (Reminds you of science manifesto) On lection they said that a lot of people leave on days 5-6 because it's too hard, well it certainly is hard. Day 6 Holyshit, I develop equanimity with such a fast rate from all this practices. Equanimity is amazing, super foundational skill. It gives you the freedom and choice to react or not to react and how to react to a phenomena. A must have skill in life. In that day I had huge realizations on how EQ (emotional intelligence) is so much more important than IQ (intellect) in almost all facets if your life. It is like 10-15x more important. It is pure emotional mastery, you HAVE to develop it if you are to do something in life. All days I was developing a cold and this day I actually got sick. I had rainy nose and with that it was 5x harder to meditate. I regretted I didn't take any medication with me. Althought this cold in some sick way helped to develop even more equanimity and sense the impermanent nature of reality even more, Anicha. My roommate saw my "suffering" , spoke to me and gave me a pill. That pill didn't help much but it was kinda nice to see that someone was flexible with rules just as I as I was keeping the journal. On days 2 or 3 my pen died and I had no writing device anymore. But there was a marker in our dorm with which we were supposed to sign our plastic glasses. I had to sneak this marker everytime I wanted to write something and then return it. For me it was a separate quest, a stealth-like mission. I tried to ask for a medication from managers. They had everything I need but I needed the guru's permission to take it. Could only see guru the next day. Got some stage blue wibe from that. Day 7 Couldn't sleep at night at all due to my cold. Anicha, Anicha, Anicha (impermamence in pali), repeated it like a mantra. Finally met a guru and got my cure. Feeling better but still sick. Still being amazed how big equanimity is. Having a feeling that the best known self-development concepts and techniques regarding emotional mastery and self-mastery are almost identical to what Buddhism teaches. Most Leo's videos on these topics are basically a pure Buddhism philosophy. And that's great. I'd call it the advanced or the best version of psychology. Key insight of the day - All suffering comes from not accepting the reality as it is Day 8 Was also a hard day for me. I got depressed by uncertainty regarding my life purpose and it led to a lot of negative thinking. Then I had thought that a true self-actualizing individual is unfazed by uncertainty, he embraces it. It helped. Also I got a deep realization that the only thing we ever have\had\will have is the current present moment. We live in that particular present moment. And what we do in that particular moment determines what we become in 3 days\5days\week\month\year\5 years\so on. That motivated me to push really hard with my practice. I also had some insights regarding how should I think about my life purpose. When I was "waving" my awareness through my spinal cord this day I happened to receive a ecstatic, orgasmic-like feeling across all spinal cord. It was continuing for like 2-3 minutes and then passed away. I thought of it as chakra activation. I went to a guru and confronted him with that, I asked "What was that, could it be the kundalini energy awakening or some other shit?" - he told me some generic answer like don't distract yourself with labels, there are all kinds of pleasant sensations, don't get attached to them, everything Is anicha - arising and passing away. I had problems with my tailbone. When I was sitting for too much I experienced pain and discomfort in it. After this experience I feel like 90% less pain and discomfort in this place, almost nothing at all. Very interesting… Day 9 Finally got better, I think days 6-8 were the hardest days besides day 4 because of my sickness Realizing on a deeper level that reality is as it is and that I have the freedom to play the game however I want. Having an insight on leadership - Leadership is about other people reacting to 1 particular person. The less equanimity you have - the more likely you are to become a worshipper, a follower, to follow someone=to react Also got a realization that nearly all authorities try to limit open-mindedness and individuality. They try their best to fit you, to make you like everyone else, to kill your desire to experiment and stand out. Generally they do it for self-preserving purposes but also a lot of times they actually have good intentions. They try to keep you out of danger. In that sense this vipassana retreat is doing it too, probably more out of good intentions. They say that you should be an individual thinker but at the same time they try to sell you an idea that their vision on how to do spirituality and live life is the most optimal. Although they don't push it. This retreat is not a sect, and they do it not in the same rigid manner as government\conventional religion\college\businesses\your typical family does it. They do it very gently and almost unnoticeable . But I still noticed it. I think they are trying to prevent Zen Devils. Got a huge insight\realization on love. The only true love is accepting other person the way he really is, not as we'd like him to be. The only true love is unconditional love. Any other love is just loving your own pictures and images of this person in your head and cannot really be defined as loving the OTHER person. Any other love is purely egoic because you love YOUR own concept of a person. Day 10 On that day the schedule was not as intense and we finally were able to speak with each other and with women too. It was a little bit weird at first to "break the silence" but after a while everyone was socializing. It was very pleasurable to get to know like-minded people In real-life. Most of them were into spirituality and self-development work to various degrees. Most of the people here I'd estimate as stage Green in spiral dynamics with few of them skewing pretty hard to orange. Perhaps there were few stage yellow people but I didn't spot them. Everyone had very different backgrounds and reasons to come to this retreat. Some of people were just ordinary folks having the most ordinary life you could possibly imagine but some of them were really hardcore taking hardcore 30-40 days retreats in monasteries in Thailand and doing psychedelics and all kinds of other things for personal development. It was actually a pretty nice experience to talk about all that crazy shit in real life with someone and these hardcore people were one of the most valuable to talk to. We had a shit load of green talk discussing emotions, relationships, well-being, consciousness, healthy food, healthy drinks, medicine, alternative medicine (this one is very big), different styles of yoga (there were even a couple of yoga teachers), different meditation techniques (I got to know about gong meditation, lol), holotrop shamanic breathing (to my surprise it is super popular in Russia). I spoke with some women here and God it was amazing. I've never seen such open, "present in a moment" and "pure" women in my life. Spiritual women are the best. I think such women are the best girlfriend and marriage material. To be honest right now after seeing all this I don't know if I'll ever want to be in a serious relationship with a woman who is on not on "a path". It was super valuable experience for me as I am trying to embody green right now. The very important thing was that I managed to see the limitations of stage green. Most people here were not so much into action. They just loved to talk about everything and share their emotions and opinions. They mostly don't care about serious spirituality. They do it to feel happy, not to find the existential truth. They also don't care that much about advancing the society and having their own impact in it. I came to see guru for last time and asked him about enlightenment. He gave me some generic answers and said that in order to achieve enlightenment you have " to get rid of all impurities" . In their tradition they value ethics and morality very heavily and they align ethics with a path to enlightenment . You could get the impression that this guru was quite useless but not really, he helped me greatly to grasp Buddhism concepts on a deeper level and see the implications of them in real life. So basically that is it, after 10 days were over we were able to go home. Results\integration: • I feel very surreal. Huge awareness of ego. It is greatly numbed but i still identify with my body and believe in a lot of stuff of what i am capable or not capable of doing • I am completely open to accepting reality, other people and different perspectives completely as they are, I feel like I moved to stage yellow greatly and tapped a bit into turquoise . • My values shifted and now Truth is the 1st priority • Got a direct experience of chakras and "energetic body" • My body awareness increased like 30x from the vipassana technique. Now I am able to send electrical signals throughout my whole body if I want to. Performance in gym greatly increased from that. • I'm 10x more equanimous. I don't care about petty stuff nearly at all, it feels like 99% of petty things can't trigger me (before it was like 70%) • I feel 5-10x more mindful throughout the day and have better ability to "maintain" this mindfulness • My ability to concentrate increased tremendously (10-15x) • My capacity for compassion greatly increased. • I have 0 urge to criticize and judge others. Deep realization that it is all meaningless • My ability to contemplate deep stuff and see connections greatly increased • I have a shit ton of creative ideas on business and life • Deep desire to go implement them • Addiction to social media, phone and useless chatting greatly reduced. Having a lot of awareness on how to work on other addictions\unwanted behaviors (for example certain unconscious eating patterns) • A desire to be mindful\aware as much as possible and as DEEP as possible (to see\notice more stuff on a more profound level) • Developed a big tolerance to physical discomfort\pain P.S. if you decide to go to such a retreat I advice you to work on your meditation posture beforehand, to learn half-lotus or something like that, having poor improper posture makes all of this experience extra painful. Also, don't forget to take some basic medication to not rely on some guru's permission. If you have any questions regarding my experience - feel free to ask them

From what I understand (which grated isn't much), the answer is yeah, kinda. There is no you. So there is no you/spirit, that goes on after you die. You are God/Infinity/The Absolute. You are everything and everyone. And everything that has ever happen and will ever happen, is happening (or more accurately Not happening), all right Now. So you(God) are everyone person, animal, plant, insect, planet, that has ever been, and will ever be. So in a way, that could be seen as reincarnation. Certainly closer than the religions or science, to the Truth.

Over the last months I have sunk deeper into mysticism and awareness. Just recently I had an abstract experience with 5MeoDMT last week where everything I was aware of dissolved into one primordial liquid, a field of endless possibilities and manifestations, it was both scary and majestic. I stumbled upon the Seth material the other day, a woman who learned to channel a trans-dimensional intelligence who she calls "Seth",, I am not yet entirely sure if thats really possible but clearly the lady knows her shit and its been a fascinating read so far. Tho they place a huge emphasis on the idea of reincarnation and a persistent individual soul. The way I see it, our bodies and experiences share within the same soul, the one god that makes up all of reality. For me, to begin to conceptualize the idea of individual souls would bring conflicts of separation from the one source of it all. What are your thoughts?

Jesus says, the day of judgement is coming near and, “There is only one life. Once lost, lost for ever.” That’s why Jesus never used the Indian device of reincarnation. All the three religions born in the west , Jews, Mohammedans, Christians they have never used the Indian device. Jesus knew perfectly well about reincarnation. There are indirect hints spread all over the Gospels. Jesus says, “I am before Abraham ever was.” And he says, “I will be coming back.” Moses and Jesus saw what happened to India through the theory of reincarnation. Because of the theory of reincarnation, India became very lethargic, there is no hurry. India has no time sense, not even now. How can you have time sense when eternity is available? When there are so many lives, why be in such a hurry? One can go on slowly, one is bound to reach some day or other. They decided that it was better to tell people, “There is only one life, this is the last chance, the first and the last, if you miss it, you miss forever.” This is a device to create intense longing, to create such intensity in people that they can be transformed easily.

Everything is possible. Almost everything. Nothing needs to be destroyed. It can be compressed or put to good use and converted. If there is a lack of resources the resources can be increased. Evrything is perfectly flexible --- - - - - %- - + Spirituality will consist of Gut instinct and intuition Emotional growth Emotional stability Mental peace Cultivation of empathy and love Charity Communal harmony Prayer Desires Connection to God Alignment with the universe Letting go Acceptance Wisdom Meditation Soulforce Reincarnation Afterlife Divine energy Healing and balance Equilibrium Forgiveness Brotherhood Support and protection Meaning Purpose Authenticity living an authentic life Energy Will power Karma.. Most people who do good or have noble intentions are naturally protected and are comfortable with and provided for in their lives. Others who are evil tend to live in in the most disgusting conditions. Stages in spirituality 1..You will start hating the world or see everything as pointless or dysfunctional and delusional 2..You will see all the illusions created around you. 3..You will be less selfish and your prayers will be for sincere reasons. 4....You might be depressed but even in hopelessness or despair you will either be peaceful or hopeful and positive. 5...You will experience a strange kind of peace. 6..You will have a more open and bigger heart and you will be be able to accept suffering more openly without conflict. 7...Love and empathy will appear to be the most important element of existence. 8..Everything will have the perspective of love. 9..You might begin to dislike people and their behavior will appear as very selfish and immature and as a result you will dissociate and detach yourself from people and become a loner. You will begin to embrace solitude more than before. 10.....All creatures will appear equal and equally important. 11....Life will seem like a transient flow of the human breath and you will no longer be afraid of death because death will appear like a beginning of a new journey into the afterlife. 12.....Life might seem pointless 13....There can be nihilistic tendencies. 14...Death will not appear as something miserable or saddening but rather peaceful and as a cessation of suffering or a way to put oneself out of one's miseries. 15....You will be less racist and more accepting of other cultures, races and differences. You will be less prejudiced or biased. You will be less judgemental. 16....It helps you to love yourself better. In a devoted kind of way.. Not in a Narcissistic way. If you're struggling with self destructive behavior, it helps to feel more connected to your body and mind and you begin to radiate love and that love reaches to your own body and mind as well, in a way your own love that emerges from you nourishes you. It really heals self pity and self destructive tendencies 17......You begin to respect yourself and your body much more. 18....It helps heal neurotic tendencies and mental illnesses. 19...You will be less miserable and sadistic You will be empathetic to other's suffering. 20...You will want happiness abundance and prosperity. 21.. You will try to minimize problems and chaos. 22...You will understand the spiritual side and the physical nature of things. 23....You will have a better sense of intuition and inner connection. 24...You will more connected to your inner spirit. 25...You will feel liberated. 26..You will have more compassion. 27....Your will be strong and you will bravely face difficulties and problems 28...You will be more forgiving and you will see mankind as stupid and foolish. 29....You will be wiser with your choices. 30....You will value principles over materialism, gains and benefits. - - - - - - - - - + + Focus Spirituality and health and less on emotions.

You’re an illusion, which is actuality infinite nothing. Ego’s don’t like this, so they create thoughts like spirits, reincarnation, gurus, religions, etc. Ego strives to hold on to that falsity of separation at ALL costs. Without ego this is obvious, and hilarious. ❤️

The enlighten individual has gone beyond reality, he has reached the potential of a human being and probably does not need reincarnation. But who knows the secret of death, where we will get catapulted after death. Maybe we just have to wait and see for ourselves, as we shall. I can imagine the immense shock of realizing that there was no death, and here I am.

@Mikael89 I may have been unclear. I'm not saying consciousness can be annihilated. I'm not even saying phenomena can be annihilated, just that to the enlightened it wouldn't make any difference if it was. If you're so indifferent to the world that you couldn't care less whether all phenomena disappears tomorrow or continues, what difference does it make whether it does or it doesn't? So it is annihilation. Re reincarnation, my mind has long been open to that concept (it makes sense), but I don't believe dogmas without evidence and certainly wouldn't bet the governing strategy of my entire life on it. In any case, it's beside the point, we're not considering actually committing suicide, we're using it as a thought experiment. Think of a time when you didn't know about enlightenment or believe in reincarnation. Someone says 'Life sucks. Why don't you kill yourself? Then you'll know what happens when you die'. Would you have done it? It's the same question. Re 'life is bullshit', perhaps this summarises our differences and reinforces my point about the reasons anyone would want to be enlightened. I don't think life's bullshit. .................................................................................................................................................................................................... I won't have internet access for a few days now so I'm going to wrap up my part in this discussion. I know I've been provocative, and I'm sorry if I've ruffled anyone's feathers, but I stand by my tiny effort to balance a discourse that too easily leads to unrealistic expectations and a careless 'of course enlightenment' perspective. Views some have expressed here such as 'there are no cons to enlightenment' reinforce my theory that many seekers don't know what they're asking for, and are expecting a big pay off that isn't going to happen. 'There are no pros or cons to anything' might make more sense, but could you say it and mean it? I used to think enlightenment was a no-brainer, too, but you know what - there is absolutely no obvious answer to whether it's a worthwhile pursuit. From the perspective of the human being, of course it isn't. From the perspective of God, nothing's worthwhile, who cares? For my part I will be probably be contemplating this for a while before deciding whether I return to seeking or not. Special thanks to @Solace @Emerald @Victor Mgazi for the food-for-thought.

Hey, ya'll, I need your help! I want to create a comprehensive list of video examples of prototypical stage Turquoise thinking. This is meant to be an educational tool for people learning about Spiral Dynamics. So towards that end, scour Youtube and find all the videos you can which exhibit stage Turquoise thinking. Try to find videos which are short and sweet. The more diversity we can display here, the better. Try to find examples from various cultures. We will create a mega-thread like this for every stage in the Spiral, from Red to Turquoise. But here, let's just focus on Turquoise. Each week I will start a new mega-thread topic for the next stage. Do not start a political debate in this thread! It is not our goal here to defend our personal political positions or to judge any stage, but simply to compile examples. Thanks for your help! I'm excited to see what kind of juicy stuff you dig up. Try to be selective with your choices. This can turn into a really cool list. Stage Turquoise Values: Consciousness Elevating mankind’s consciousness Truth Deep metaphysical insight Wisdom, the wisdom of nature Mysticism, spirituality, nonduality God, divinity Holism, integration, synthesis vs analysis Integrating all religions & science Left & right brain synthesis Honesty, transparency, authenticity Being vs knowing, doing, having Simplicity, flowing with nature Minimalist sustainable living Collaborative synergy Human wellness Healing at all levels: physical, emotional, spiritual Exploring altered states of consciousness Intuition Channeling: direct downloads from infinite intelligence Supernatural creativity Spiritual purification Awakening, transcendence, liberation Unconditional love, compassion for all Emotional mastery Presence, mindfulness Paradox Esoteric teachings Gratitude Unity Deeper & deeper levels of interconnectedness Selfless living Sacrifice self for greater consciousness Meditation, yoga, contemplation, self-inquiry Not-knowing Humility Spontaneity, playfulness, self-amusement The really big picture Stage Turquoise Examples: Sadhguru, Shunyamurti, Thomas Campbell, Yoda, David Hawkins, Ken Wilber, Shinzen Young, Deepak Chopra, Stan Grof, Osho, Mooji, Ramaji, Rupert Spira, Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth, Yogananda, Martin Ball, Terence McKenna, Carl Jung, Sri Aurobindo, Pierre Teilhard de Chardin, Ervin Laszlo, David Loy, Alan Watts, Wim Hof, Matt Kahn, Dalai Lama, Sasha Shulgin, yoga, holotropic breathwork, The Holographic Universe, Akashic Records, noosphere, opening the 3rd eye, pineal gland, out of body experiences, samadhi experiences, siddhis, paranormal abilities, clairvoyants, channels, mediums, Bashar, Aleister Crowley, Rudolf Steiner, alternative healing systems, Maya, psychedelics, 5-MeO-DMT, StarTrek: The Q, Rupert Sheldrake’s morphogenetic fields, Dean Radin’s paranormal research, Gandhi’s ideas of pluralistic harmony, Gaia, biocentrism, Monroe Institute, Esalen Institute, transpersonal psychology, Jung’s collective unconscious, quantum field theory, sacred geometry, reincarnation, opening chakras, saints, sages, mystics, prophets, etc.

You'll just be catapulted into a new life anyway. Reincarnation man. And in this new life you might not be aware of actualized.org and that suicide is really not that much of a problem. Better work a bit on your (illusory) karma while you have the chance.

In this essay, I will try my best to use the language of logic to indicate the significance of the illogical for those who are too attached to logic, yet I will also argue against the illogical for those who are too attached to the dimension of the heart. Then, I'm trying to create a holistic perspective in which both are integrated, but neither one of them has become an attachment. This will have its limitations, because the first "illogicality" I was talking about was in a certain sense still logical. That illogicality can still be logically pointed out why it is functional. So there's a certain rationality towards that dimension of being irrational. However, there is a certain point where no matter how strong your logic is, a leap will have to be taken into trust. Trust, genuine trust (not faith or belief), requires you to take a jump into the absurd, the unexplainable, the unknowable: not having the capacity to be understood by the mind. This I call the truest form of absurdity, of illogicality. It's difficult to argue why this has so much significance to take this jump; you will have to experience it, that's the only way. However, there are still some pointers I can provide, some perspectives that can be utilized. But obviously, only the direct experience can free you and truly make you understand it, and not a intellectual agreement of it, though this can be the first step. Firstly, let's discuss the matter of why atheism/rationalism, and its loyal brother called "science", is an act of limiting yourself and ultimately an ego strategy for keeping you stuck. Often times, people ask for "evidence" when a certain statement is made within the realm of religiousity or spirituality, or even just general self-development. The problem is, that such a thing cannot be proven as an absolute truth by its very nature, because everybody is different. Science is good for the development of new technologies and the discoveries of universal truths, such as the realm of physics and mathemathics. However, as far as the matter of humanity is concerned, things really start becoming much more complex. The realm of spirituality, religion and even psychology are cluttered with paradoxes and opposites. What is poison for one person, can be the cure for the other one. It all depends on the makeup of someone's system: one's heart, one's beliefs, one's conditioning, one's personality and so forth... For this reason, how can science and psychology provide any evidence for a technique that would work for all? Impossible! We are all unique individuals, and there is no absolute truth that works for everyone all the time. At least, as far as the conventional perspective is concerned. From the perspective of the absolute, of the all, then perhaps there are truths that work for everyone. Let me give you an example. Take the statement: Love frees you from suffering. Is this true? I would definitely say so. However, what happens when people start taking this statement very seriously? Then people start to act loving, to pretend they are loving, to believe they are loving, when in reality they carry a lot of judgement, resentment, hatred and so forth within them. In reality, the action that is required for them could be to become very assertive, dismiss people out of their lives, start saying "NO!", become angry at someone and defend themselves from hurt that others can inflict upon them. It's not to say that THAT is the absolute truth either for happiness and peace, but it is the relative truth that at that moment works for them, because that is a part they need to develop at that point. True love is only possible when you know how to defend and assert yourself. True love also doesn't mean to always be soft, kind and gentle towards people. Sometimes it is necessary to be harsh and to deliver uncomfortable truths to people directly. Again, relative truths that they need to embody at that stage of their development. Do you see the limitations of science here in the fields of psychological development? Humans are incredibly complex, and a particular advice can be poison for one person and medicine for the other. It all depends what part of them they need to develop at that particular stage in their evolution. Sometimes masculine values have to practiced, and sometimes feminine values. What I just argued for wasn't necessarily against atheistic viewpoints so much; It didn't do much to disprove the notion of a purely materialistic and accidental reality, as atheists believe, but my feeling is that many rationalists turn towards science to explain for them how to live, and my argumentation was to support the dismissal of this notion. Then, if we understand the complexity of our psychology, and we realize that there are no absolute truths and therefore techniques or methods we can eternally hold onto, we may start to realize that our intellectual systems will eventually be limiting towards progressing further in our evolution. Then, we may start looking for a different center from which to make decisions from. This is where the heart comes into play: The world of feelings and emotions. However, what usually (if not always) happens is that instead of understanding that an integration between heart and mind needs to take place, which allows the intuition of the soul to truly open up, we start instead becoming identified with our feelings and we dismiss the cold rationality of the mind. It's not that the mind now has completely disappeared, but that it now utilizes the heart for its beliefs and decisions. It's not that at this point that the identification with the mind has been transcended, but that the mind now simply doesn't purely function from itself only. Feelings now have a great significance, and certainly they do have a great existential importance, but the irony is that the mind starts dismissing its own analytical processes; at least on the surface level. In reality, the mind is still running the entire business, but the underlying belief one is now attached to is: "I should go by what feels right". One does now realize the importance of connection, love, communion, empathy and so forth, but fails to understand that the mind has to be used in this physical reality. Mind has its purpose, and needs to be used consciously, instead of being dismissed. If we fail to integrate our heart and mind, we then start becoming too "weak". We become too floaty, too undriven, too undisciplined. We start dismissing rational, logical decisions which would've helped us further or prevented us from getting in trouble because "It doesn't feel right" Ultimately, this will backfire on us. This is the hypocrisy that —often cold-hearted— rational people such as atheists can see in people who are too identified with their emotions and feelings, as we are experts in pointing out the flaws of our polar opposites, but fail to see the dysfunctionality within ourselves. So naturally, scientists, atheists, rationalists, and all the types of people who are functioning almost purely from their mind and logical systems, feel a great resistance towards the people who get so caught up in their emotions and feelings, as they can see that they get nothing done, that they lack a "down-to-earth" approach, that they are too much floating around in the skies, that they lack self-control and discipline. And certainly, there is a certain truth to this. However, if we dismiss our subjective reality entirely, then we set ourselves up for a great amount of suffering. Then we keep in our emotions, then we start to feel disconnected from existence and other human beings, then we repress our desires if they don't correlate to our rationalist perspective, then we start becoming overwhelmed by stress and anxiety... You may become very succesful in the material world, but you'll realize it's all hollow and you're still the same unhappy person as you were before. In fact, you are unhappier now because you now got what you thought you needed to be happy, but you're still not happy. Now, hope also starts slipping out of your hands. The only way out of this is to start realizing the significance of your subjective reality; You start honouring your feelings, your emotions. You allow yourself to cry or to express joy and laughter in a very frivolous, free-flowing manner. This can be a great relief to your system, and you start to realize the significance of feelings and emotions. However, as I have already explained, the mind tends to swing to the polar opposite. At first we may have honored our rationalism to a great degree, but as we started seeing the pain of our lack of emotional awareness, we now tend to become very antagonistic towards what we first considered to be so valuable. Somehow, we often start to forget all the hypocrisy we saw in people who became very identified with their emotions and feelings. I have already explained what this can result in. Let's get into the next phase. There comes a point when we start once again see the limitations of this identification with all these feelings and the dismissal of the mind, as we were able to when we were still rationalists. However, if we've lived through this phase of feeling-identification, we now start to realize that both heart and mind has a certain significance. This is the door to wisdom. We start to understand that both the language of the heart and the mind has a certain significance. What we don't immediately understand however, is how to proprely integrate both of them. We now start to try to philosophize and figure out logical systems in which we can somehow apply a technique, a strategy, a method as on how to integrate them. We think and think, and the more we go into the many perspectives on what ground or logic we can make our decisions on, the more we start to realize that there is always an opposite perspective to whatever standpoint we take. We use logic —the mind— to try and integrate mind and heart, but again and again we fail to truly understand how to find this balance, because if we really go deeply into it, we always realize that an opposing argument is just around the corner for whatever standpoint we try to take. This can lead to greats amount of confusion, because we don't know what is left and right anymore, what's up and above, what will help us and what will hinder us, what is forward and what is backward... Life can start becoming really difficult and, as was my personal experience, you can come to a point where you become so confused that it paralyzes you to the point where all you do is lay in bed all day, just thinking —even though you're physically perfectly health— and the confusion and thoughts become so crippling that you lose the motivation to do anything at all, except for perhaps supplying the needs for your physical survival. This is the dark night of doubt and confusion, which I personally probably went into more extremely than 99% of people ever will, granted people will reach this stage in their life in the first place. It got me to the point where I started considering and attempting suicide. And it was not merely because I wanted the pain to stop (as I was very open to the idea of reincarnation, this seemed rather futile anyways), but because all other ideas had failed for me, I now had the idea that perhaps if I push the pain to so far that it reaches a certain limit, then perhaps it will somehow instantly transform me, or at least reverse the direction that my life seemed to be heading in. I'm talking about the pain you experience when you're on the edge of death, but haven't made the last step into it yet. So it wasn't really about actually ending it, but pushing the pain to such an extreme so that perhaps something would crack in me and I would have some sort of transformation. It was a last-resort solution, no other idea seemed to work for me anymore. Eventually, I started to realize that this wasn't going to work out for me either. Either it was going to be actual suicide, or a complete change in attitude. Even though I had very strong doubts and fears that it would actually work, there was just one thing I could think of. And that was this: I simply had to make decisions, not knowing whether they were right or wrong, not knowing whether they were helpful or hindering, not knowing whether it was going to make things better or worse, but making decisions for the sake of learning to make decisions, and committing to them (for that moment), as much as I can. It was completely stepping into the complete unknown, having all my intuitive capacities of feeling what I should be doing overshadowed by doubts and fears, and despite all of that still making decisions, and somehow, for no logical explanation at all, still trusting myself and existence in spite of all the worries, that I was heading in the right direction. This is the trust I want to talk about. This is the trust I can not —despite all my clever philosophical capacities— make an argument for as to why to go with it. Except for that it works. Where one who is identified with feelings only may call his/her decisions based on trust, it is still based on faith and identifying with a mental position, namely: "I should go with what feels right". It seems like you're trying to go with your intuition, but in fact, you're not. You're going with a mental position, where your heart simply facilitates your head. Or perhaps I should say: you're going with feeling-intuition, but not with being-intuition. Being-intuition seems in some ways similair to feeling-intiution, but in fact it is radically different. This is the type of intuition that I can not explain or argue in favour for to any rationalist. With feeling-intuition, I can still show the rationalist the significance of feelings and emotional expression as to unburden himself. With being-intuition, my hands are tied. It is a mystery as to what it is. Sometimes it tells you to go with "what feels right", thus implying heart. Sometimes it tells you to go with "what needs to be done", thus implying mind. And sometimes it is somewhere in between. But of course, it doesn't take up a mental position. It simply decides. And you trust it. How can you trust it? How do you know it won't deceive you? Well, there's no way to argue it away, but you simply trust it. It is letting the unknown function through you, and the only indication that this is the right thing to do is the sense of tranquility and peace you get from going along with it, which doesn't mean it stays away from discipline and things you really don't feel like doing. Often times, I don't really even know if I'm listening to my being-intuition or if i'm getting identified with either a mental or emotional (feeling-intuition) position. I'm not so acquianted with it just yet. I've only started to become somewhat acquainted with turquoise for less than a year now [reference to spiral dynamics model]. To differentiate being-intuition from and identification with an idea or feeling is very difficult to notice, very subtle. Most characteristic about it, I would say, is that the element of confusion or hesitation has started disappearing from it. Not that you know for sure this is the right decision, at least intellectually, but there's is no need to be sure anymore. You start to understand that the problem all along was not the decisions you were making, but the division within yourself you were creating when you were making your decisions. One part of you said you should do A, another part said you should do B. Perhaps you were identified with the position of A, but still your unconscious desired for B (or vica versa), so you were in conflict. Perhaps you were genuine enough to see both the validity of A and B, but were unsure as to what to choose, thus still in conflict. Now, with this being-intuition, the decision you make is not important anymore. You can choose A, and that's fine. You can choose B, and that's fine. Perhaps you can even choose AB, and that's also fine. Or perhaps today you choose A, and tomorrow you choose B, and eitherway it is still fine. Now, you start to become truly flexible: being able to switch between a feminine, passive modality to a masculine, active modality very quickly, for whatever the situation requires. You realize that none of this really matters, as long as there is not conflict within you making decisions. Finally, you really start to realize there's no need to worry at all, because you've come to the absolute realization of your own ignorance, so why be worried? You don't know anyways. You can't know! All this worry and striving and contemplating and pondering and disciplining and attempting to accept, trying to not try... All of that was just a complete joke! And you don't even renounce striving, or contemplating or anything like that. If it's a joke, then why avoid it? Jokes are to be played around with. If you start fighting with a joke, it won't be a joke anymore. In realizing all of this, true spirituality and peace starts to become available to you. Finally, you're approaching the promised land, which in reality was never anywhere else but here to begin with. But... Don't take what I say as a philosophy. You have to apply the specific lessons that are relevant for you right now. Your situation is different than mine. Be genuine with yourself, and see what the specific lesson is that you need to learn right now. Don't try to avoid it, even if it is very painful. The only way to peace is to go through the pain of facing yourself, facing your demons. There is no other way. Avoidance is simply delay. What's the point in delay?