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Remorse is valid; not guilt I've been going off on tangents lately ranting about the harmful notion of guilt. It hasn't been that long ago that I would feel guilty over random thoughts that would float through my mind. How crazy is that. It's so unnecessary. A crazy or negative thought does not have to be identified with. It can simply be let go of. This is not me. Saying the inner No to thoughts randomly generated by our word mechanism as Oscar Ichazo put it. Guilt is promoted by the fundamentalists of religions to divide people against themselves which makes them more susceptible to manipulation and thus control. Im making a distinction here between guilt and remorse which I see and experience as valid. If one didn't experience remorse, that would classify one as a psychopath or a sociopath proper, but being stained with the idea of guilt is worse than useless. It's a curse upon man in which he is under its spell. This is not something that I dreamed up on my own but rather got through the new version of the ICHING- The Oracle Of The Cosmic Way. Just ponder this notion and sit with it in your life and discern for yourselves. This is so much more than a book. Carol Anthony and Hana Moog are so overlooked in this Genus work they have through both sincere effort and synchronicity, produced. I wish Terrence McKenna was around to comment on this work. He referred to the Old Tradional ICHING and getting a reading from it was like throwing a coin which had 64 sides to it to receive an answer. This is another example where the wisdom of the Divine Feminine is leading the way in this new 2000 year 'Galactic month' which began slowly in 1963. Oscar Ichazo- The Holy Idea which acts as a catalyzer for the transformation of this ego is Holy Love/ Divine Love. This can lead to the Virtue (energy) of Action. According to Ichazo, Divine Love is “The awareness that though the laws which govern reality are objective, they are not cold, because these cosmic laws inevitably lead to the creation of organic life, and Life itself, like all natural phenomena, fulfills a cosmic purpose. As soon as the mind’s word mechanism is destroyed, love, the natural condition of the mind, appears. Love begins the moment man contemplates the Creation and says, ‘Thank you, God.’ All men feel this somewhat, no animal can feel this at all. Man alone can know that all comes from God.” From The New ICHING - The Oracle of the Cosmic Way-

This is an NDE on the NDERF website Stephen T NDE Home Classification NDE 1308 Stephen T NDE 3359 Experience Description 1. Surfing incident 2. Caught in a trough under water in huge surf. 3. Panic knowing I am going to drown. 4. Realized I had to give up, could not hold breath any longer. 5. Sudden calmness and resignation; loss track of body. 6. Clear and graphic life review as if certain events were cataloged. 7. Visualized a large green blue circle with a feeling of depth but did not look like tunnel. 8. Suddenly found myself in a large hall with a stone bath being washed by humanoid aliens; very peaceful (this was certainly a subjective illusion). 9. Sudden transformation into a realm of timeless Absolute Beauty, Absolute Love and Absolute Infinity. The radiance was literally unbearable. 10. Absolute forgiveness, non-judgment, non-duality, timeless, no blame or retribution, no sin karma and no reincarnation. No God as there was no subject or object of attention I AM That. 11. Beyond science, religion, spirituality, new age phantasmagoria. This is the most real insight of my whole life and clearly remains with me after thirty years. In my hippy years experimented with drugs e.g. acid however nothing, but nothing, compares with this insight. Also came across a similar state during meditation. Somewhere in this process, I became conscious of the fact that I must return to the world and play out my allotted role. This really pissed me off. As I crawled up the beach, I really didn't want to be here and in many ways have just been waiting for this lot to finish. 12. Theoretical implications: a) Absolute Infinity is a fact; George Cantors set theory provides sound theoretical evidence of the mathematical context of infinity. (We do not create infinity it is literally thrust upon us and is therefore absolutely necessary.) Hugh Everett's many worlds interpretation of particle wave duality; Max Tegmark's theoretical application to infinite universes. See also John Barrow 'Pi in the Sky' and Rudy Rucker's 'Infinity and Mind'. Evolution is asymmetrical, that is the billion to one symmetry violation at the origins (matter/antimatter) of the universe supervenes through complexification and self-organization onto Darwinian selection as a bias for pleasure over pain. Evolution is not value neutral. Given infinite universes non-denumerable infinity tells us that every moment must exist infinitely for all possible sum over histories (Richard Feynman) for all possible universes. (Will be pushing for space here.) Given infinite universes and infinite sentient civilizations infinite civilizations will survive for vast time scales eventually resolving into Absolute Infinity and Absolute Love. This state of beingness is a permanent aspect of every part of existence. Science has become shackled to skepticism and the narrow constraints of a very primitive epoch in the scheme of biological and silicon based evolution. Ray Kurweil demonstrates the capacity of potentiation in his demonstration of cosmological, computational and exponential technological growth. We will eventually drop the distinction between artificial and carbon based intelligence for new cohesive constructs far beyond our current capacity to visualize. As cells in our bodies are not conscious of our bodies, our self-conscious minds are not cognizant of the Absolute because we are bound by cognitive duality. Consciousness is dualistic and narrative based whereas awareness is timeless and immediate. Yet for anything to exist, whether subjective or objective, they must inevitably be absolute necessary aspects of a perfect existence. One also has to take into account the profound paradox of time (quantum block time) relativistic twin paradox, matter antimatter time vector reversal etc. we really don't know much. The axis of existence proceeds from the Pervasive Ground (unified field) through Manifest Material Reality and onto Infinite Potentiality. Existence is an Infinite Web of context and though the local universe has some 10 to the 26 bits of information they overlap and furthermore are connected non-locally. Existence is not constructed of finite locatable things it is a nonlinear process of textural flow and integration. Lot more I could add however gives the gist of what I am on about. Hid in a corner all these years however when saw this site decided to have a stab at explaining my NDE. I have written extensively but not published. Who, after all is interested in radical and revisionary ideas. After all they forced Thomas Kuhn into a corner. Our current epoch is incommensurable with a civilization two hundred two thousand, two million or a billion years older. Plenty more where this came from. It's time to wake up and go beyond the magic and mythology of religion and the primitive egocentrism of science. Background Information: Gender: Male Date NDE Occurred: 1967 NDE Elements: At the time of your experience, was there an associated life-threatening event? Yes Accident On a surfing trip - near drowning Life threatening event, but not clinical death Nearly drowned. Coughing and spluttering I somehow managed to get to shore and crawl out of the water having given up all hope as I was clearly convinced that I was drowning. I truly thought I was a finished. How do you consider the content of your experience? Wonderful Did you feel separated from your body? Yes I lost awareness of my body How did your highest level of consciousness and alertness during the experience compare to your normal everyday consciousness and alertness? More consciousness and alertness than normal As above. At what time during the experience were you at your highest level of consciousness and alertness? When I literally died to my old self and was wrapped in Absolute Love and Absolute Forgiveness. I do not look through my eyes anymore what sees is beyond my poor confused self-conscious mind. The looking through is not mine it is boundless non-dual timeless and perfect. See ya later God. Were your thoughts speeded up? Incredibly fast Did time seem to speed up or slow down? Everything seemed to be happening at once; or time stopped or lost all meaning Timeless. It was shock to emerge from immediate awareness to consciousness. I most certainly did not die and here of course lie the rub. However it is relatively easy to demonstrate that every moment always exists for all probable and possible moments infinitely therefore whatever is flowing through this lot is not the surface structure we identify with. Kant phenomena, noumenon or more to the point Nagajuna's such-ness, nothingness and non-duality. Were your senses more vivid than usual? Incredibly more vivid Please compare your vision during the experience to your everyday vision that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. Though there were intense and awe inspiring feelings something much deeper was operating and has remained to this day. No person can have ownership and no religion lay claim to Absolute Love. The body just didn't warrant attention. Please compare your hearing during the experience to your everyday hearing that you had immediately prior to the time of the experience. It was not like hearing but somehow directly intuiting without the necessity for language. The narrative comes afterwards and by heavens one must be absolutely vigilant not to pollute the direct experience. Did you seem to be aware of things going on elsewhere? Yes, and the facts have been checked out Did you pass into or through a tunnel? Uncertain Saw a blue green circle but did not pass through a tunnel. Did you see any beings in your experience? I actually saw them Did you encounter or become aware of any deceased (or alive) beings? Yes In the early stages I was bathed by some aliens beings. However, when I had the insight into Absolute Love everything with shape and form disappeared and had absolutely no relevance. The experience included: Void The experience included: Light Did you see, or feel surrounded by, a brilliant light? A light clearly of mystical or other-worldly origin Did you see an unearthly light? Yes Everything was light however it was not white, yellow, or black, it was pure radiance and for a timeless moment I was that radiance. Did you seem to enter some other, unearthly world? A clearly mystical or unearthly realm It is strange to look back and realize that the effects of the event continue to change my life and conception of existence on regular basis. When I write a book or article and finish it it is as if, even with all the research, I actually did nothing. It has taken to the middle years of my life to fully integrate the intellectual and experiential in a rigorous manner. Something unspoken operates beyond the self-conscious mind. Sounds whaky I know but I gotta another set of eyes. This is where the old narrative goes bottom up. Working in welfare sort of reflects a doing because it has to be done. Choiceless Freedom. so many damn dimensions and textures its downright spooky. The experience included: Strong emotional tone What emotions did you feel during the experience? Love, Love, Love, Love, Love, Joy, Joy, Joy, Joy, Bliss, Bliss, Bliss, Bliss. Absolute Forgiveness, total equity and complete union. Did you have a feeling of peace or pleasantness? Incredible peace or pleasantness Did you have a feeling of joy? incredible joy Did you feel a sense of harmony or unity with the universe? I felt united or one with the world The experience included: Special Knowledge Did you suddenly seem to understand everything? Everything about the universe The experience included: Life review Did scenes from your past come back to you? My past flashed before me, out of my control I don't think I learned anything from the experience what did happen was that I realized what I was doing, and still am doing nothing, even though I have to continue on with the trials and tribulations of life like everyone else. Absolute Love takes no prisoners you either imbibe non-judgment, and absolute forgiveness with a still mind or carry on with the useless narrative of self-justification. It is not to be learned it is to be lived. Did scenes from the future come to you? Scenes from the world's future All events exist right here and now (quantum mechanics and time) however insight steps into the timeless occasion of immediate perfection while witnessing the temporal flow of relative material reality. One could not remain in awareness because self was, and is still, irrevocably tied to material reality. To a non-dualist there is no spirit or soul because insight is subject less, objectless beginning-less and endless. At death my relative absence will be my absolute presence Nisargadatta Maharaj. Did you come to a border or point of no return? I came to a barrier that I was not permitted to cross; or was sent back against my will God, Spiritual and Religion: What was your religion prior to your experience? Liberal none Have your religious practices changed since your experience? No Religion just does not cut the mustard. Absolute Love can have no relationship with evil, devil, hell, purgatory, sin, karma, retribution, or any type of judgment blame and retribution. When they drop their absurd beliefs and magical mythical ranting then their ideologies will become redundant. By this stage, religions will be left with a whole lot of empty book covers. Absolute Love cannot be possessed or turned to any religious or political purpose. Either we love or we don't love easy peasy. Then we can party and just learn to love and care for each other on a truly equitable basis. What is your religion now? Liberal none Did you have a change in your values and beliefs because of your experience? No Religion just does not cut the mustard. Absolute Love can have no relationship with evil, devil, hell, purgatory, sin, karma, retribution, or any type of judgment blame and retribution. When they drop their absurd beliefs and magical mythical ranting then their ideologies will become redundant. By this stage, religions will be left with a whole lot of empty book covers. Absolute Love cannot be possessed or turned to any religious or political purpose. Either we love or we don't love easy peasy. Then we can party and just learn to love and care for each other on a truly equitable basis. The experience included: Presence of unearthly beings Did you seem to encounter a mystical being or presence, or hear an unidentifiable voice? I encountered a definite being, or a voice clearly of mystical or unearthly origin Did you see deceased or religious spirits? I actually saw them Concerning our Earthly lives other than Religion: During your experience, did you gain special knowledge or information about your purpose? Yes In fact this is the real bummer. When one steps outside of religion and yet admires science but sees beyond its limitations one's circle of friends becomes decidedly small. Universities philosophy and psychology departments are definitely not welcoming. Non-dual insight becomes a socially isolating. Recently tied to converse with atheists. Boy what a bunch of fundamentalists they have turned out to be. If you blow your own bags you are arrogant and misinformed if you shut up you're an introvert. Judgment, judgment everywhere judgment. Something is certainly doing I do not know what. Have your relationships changed specifically because of your experience? Yes After such a profound insight one wants to be a do-gooder and save the world however reality soon kicks in. It took a certain amount of time to realize that it is how I act in the world and what I do that assists in making the world a better place not how I attempt to change others based upon some conceptual prejudice. Reality certainly is not fair so we just have to learn to live with it and let evolution take its requisite path. After the NDE: Was the experience difficult to express in words? Yes I have spent my life working as a counselor and program manager. Studied many religious, philosophical and science based thinkers. Only two areas come to mind. The non-dualist Advaita Vedantist teacher Nisragdatta Maharaj (who rejected all religious dogma) and the approach taken by Alan Watts in his book 'The Way of Zen'. I completely reject hell, purgatory, sin, evil, damnation, judgment, blame, retribution, karma and reincarnation. Essentially the dualistic contradictory notion of God is to be voided. Absolute Infinity and Absolute Love are completely non-dual and non-judgmental. There was also a Polish Jew on a television program about NDE's who experienced Absolute Love unreservedly forgiving Nazi perpetrators. I just cried at the recognition of this wonderful man who intuited Absolute Love. I have also written extensively on Insight and Infinity however have not bothered to publish. Paradoxically, one soon learns that dogma free Absolute Forgiveness and Absolute Love either scares the hell out of many dogma bound individuals or becomes victim to scientific skepticism, scientific determinism and logical empiricism. So one soon learns to keep one's mouth shut. In my work as a counselor, I regularly use my understanding when I feel it is appropriate to assist in relieving a client's sense of hopelessness and despair. A substantial number of my clients either consider suicide or have made various attempts. We desperately need a contemporary meta-theory that is neither beholding to religion or science however it must fit within the purview of current scientific understanding. I am yet to find a satisfactory outlet for these ideas. Do you have any psychic, non-ordinary or other special gifts after your experience that you did not have before the experience? No My ability to network ideas seemed to take off. Are there one or several parts of your experience that are especially meaningful or significant to you? Nothing in my life has had the significance of the NDE and some meditation experiences that happened later. No doubt, no fear of death and a total comprehension of non-judgment. No one creates their realities life is conditioned by hereditary and socialized contingencies and if you are born in the first world then your lottery tickets certainly came up. The relative world demands a certain amount of legal accountability and responsibility and we need suitable constraints. However, the deep ocean of the Absolute is absolutely forgiving and absolutely non-judgmental. Remove judgment and reduce inner turmoil resulting in peace and equanimity. Have you ever shared this experience with others? Yes Be very, very careful the world is full of skeptics. Luckily my partner also had a NDE and out of the body experience so we at least have each other. Very useful when dealing with those clients who feel hopelessness and despair. I have worked with youth, drug addicts, families, mental health clients, domestic violence victims, service veterans and have found a deep need for a revisionary understanding of our place in existence beyond the magical and mythological assertions of religions and the self-imposed nihilism of scientific empiricism. Though I have not published this is the area I would most certainly like to move into. Did you have any knowledge of near death experience (NDE) prior to your experience? Uncertain I was a pretty spacey kid living in a fantasy world and always intuited the vastness of things. So I was very curious from an early age. Had some vague knowledge of NDE but nothing concrete. What did you believe about the reality of your experience shortly (days to weeks) after it happened? Experience was definitely real There are no illusions or delusion in reality for if there were contingent things then they could not necessarily occur. Nothing has changed. We continually confuse description with explanation however as Kurt Godel and recently Gregory Chaitin have demonstrated incompleteness is implicit within reality. We require an infinite hierarchy of descriptive and explanatory belts to explain reality and this is impossible. Insight looks back and witnesses without the duality of mental narrative. All things are accessible but not through language or symbolic representation. As there is only the emptiness and fullness of the Absolute we are all of Absolute Infinity and Absolute Love. In insight there are no degrees of separation and therefore no soul no spirit, no God, no heaven, no Hell for we are all THAT. What do you believe about the reality of your experience now? Experience was definitely real It makes me laugh that people have the gall to label events objectively real or subjectively illusory when to happen they must be real within their own context. It is not the veracity of the occurrence rather it is how that event is interpreted. If there is an infinite network of interpretations then, just maybe, watching and witnessing will generate a non-verbal understanding of our place in existence free from the labels real or illusory. Don't tell me the Absolute is not real because nothing can exist if it is not Absolutely Necessary. Everything subjective and objective is therefore necessary and given vast time scales and potentialities the texture of the web of context is indeed infinite thus we have Absolute Infinity. A word of caution. The classical argument against infinity is that it is a subjective human construct. Well here we go Mr. smarty pants philosopher infinity is thrust upon us through associational contexts between mind and word yet it is somehow an artifact of human reason. Get over it. Max Tegmark (Scientific American) does a brilliant job of refuting this erroneous argument. At any time in your life, has anything ever reproduced any part of the experience? Yes Other than drug free meditation and arts based experience nothing has come near to my NDE. I did have a meditation experience, which was similarly profound and even more enduring. The beauty of this event is that it was not induced by NDE or any form of drug stimulus. Tried Acid, marijuana and eckies in my hippy days however they are just very poor substitutes. In some ways having worked in drug and alcohol I can see what people are looking for unfortunately it isn't going to happen.

Great perspective, had a similar contemplation today starting a new job which is just a side hustle for the moment, so not a life purpose thing. I always have to think about Gurdjeff, and how he also found labor to be excellent for transformation. It's like relationships, a test on the battlefield

What is my aim? In the Fourth Way Teaching, my aim is to make it to man #6 before my Automaton konks out. Ive stated before in this Journal that in all honesty, I'm not good relationship material. I'm not looking for a wife, girlfriend or a sex partner. As I go about working on myself, this journal helps me to integrate. I enjoy interacting with kindred spirits and sometimes others of a completely different character or nature. I enjoy the friendship of both men and women. Sometimes I like to flirt a liltte bit. But not always, so I admit that up front. If I misstep I can take an ass chewing. I've survived my share of them,,, ? If I wake up in the middle of the night and half asleep respond beligerently to a post on the forum then I accept that I should be called out on it. I enjoy what could be called engaging in imaginative conjecture. Throwing out half baked ideas or far out theories. Influenced by the Keyserling School of Wisdom, I will never think of myself or take the role of a Spiritual Teacher. I have thought of offering a retreat for 'Spiritual Seekers' . In all honesty, due to the need for some supplemental income. It would be very informal and flexible. Maybe offering the use of my spacious loft, and share my refrigerator space. In a country setting with plenty of space. I would simply be a spiritual friend and sounding board. Just a few days, probably a week at the most, I might schedule others who were looking for a spiritual retreat or just a vacation In this specific niche. In no way do I intend to ever target any audience here on this forum as a customer resource. This is all still just half baked in my mind.Not even sure I want to go through with it. The following is from Chance and Choice. It is my inspiration from which I would simply be a 'spiritual friend.' A friend who will charge ??$$/per day ? In the Aquarian Age of Body Thinking, with technology, everyone has to find his personal way, starting from the dark towards the light. The age of Empires is dying and being replaced by global consciousness, a one world network of friends - Spaceship Earth. Today the individual is paramount and the differences between people are accepted and affirmed. The myth of Satan versus almighty God is exploded. The individual now finds and creates their own way. Evil can now be recognized as the personal shadow which has to be integrated with the help of psychology. Beyond good and evil, a person can be grounded in the infinite, Zero, in God. Today we find God by tuning into the basic time cycles, and discovering our basic mental gestalt, our meaning and purpose in life. In the Zero dimension the individual can find their roots in CHI, in the capacity of Self Organization. They can travel full circle from a limited ego, little "I", disassociated with the Self, onto the Zero - the Self - where the false ego is shattered. Then the way goes back from out of the Self into the true Ego, the big "I". The big "I" is in contact with the Self and includes the "I" of all others in the Universe. With the holistic Ego fully present in the fourth dimension, a person finds fulfillment by development of their unique potential, their personal path. In the Aquarian Age this path involves creative fulfillment by some type of personal service or work of some kind - work for the earth and all of nature, including human-kind. Instead of mastery and loyalty common to the last age, work and friendship are the common denominators of this age. The friendship of equals replaces the parental or schoolmaster discipline of the last age. This emphasis on friendship has already begun to transform all of society. The trend will continue as the archaic institutions of the past decay and are replaced by dynamic new structures in tune with the times. The transformation has begun on all levels, including the spiritual disciplines. For example, the School of Wisdom is a gathering of friends based on individual understanding, tolerance and merit. Followers are discouraged and adherence to specific dogmas and authoritarian lineage is anathema. The transformation has already had strong effects on the family where friendship is the new basis of both husband-wife and parent-child relationships. It is effecting business where the boss-employee relationship is becoming friendlier and less polarized-hierarchial. It is effecting world governments where the enemy us-them mentality is dying in favor of global cooperation. The holistic view of friendship on all levels has arrived - between all of humanity with each other, and between humans and all other forms of life on this planet. In the Aquarian Age ecological awareness re-emerges in importance on a global level. We are not masters of nature, we are her friends. This even applies to our technology, as our machines and computers become ever more user-friendly. The Piscean Age of industrialism and empire - which was at the end severely polluted and unfriendly to the Earth - is dead or is dying. So we should not be concerned with trying to destroy the old age, the old ways. That is inevitable. It naturally follows the Progression of the Equinoxes. Instead, we should be concerned with building solid structures to replace the old. Our new structures will last if they are based on environmental awareness and are friendly to the Earth and all forms of being and consciousness. The new historical era started on February 4, 1962 with a solar eclipse over New Guinea. At that time all of the planets, except for the trans-Saturanian ones, were located at 15 degrees Aquarius. There is no need for an apocalypse, and no need to wait for a future age of coming good. The New Age is already here, the potential is at hand. All that is needed is understanding and work to fulfill the new potentials. from: http://www.chanceandchoice.com/course-overview/time-cycles/

Being at 1000 feels so good, and the feeling of not being the body is even stronger than in the 600s, some people stop caring about spiritual growth at that level, they let their inner distortions remain because everything feels perfect anyway, they just live their life and enjoy, and because they are so fearless they don't mind if the body gets fat and unhealthy Some yogis say that 1000 (kundalini awakes and rises to the crown) is just the beginning stage, the next step, complete kundalini transformation, takes years and it's not for everyone.

Can relate. My biggest mistake was learning too much theory, books, videos, courses etc, and not enough action. I estimate that my ratio theory/action was 20:1 and this caused a lot of problems, anxiety, confusion, i was ungrounded as fuck because of all the dissonance cognitive. Consider that deep identity-level change is uncomfortable, sometimes it is almost maddening, especially with all the consciousness work we usually do here. Literally, as you do the work, the reality is changing and this is frightening to the ego. With time, i learned to ground myself and to be ok with all the chaos around me, which is a great skill for transformation.

your version of transformation and evolution(expressed in your post) /= Infinite Love's version of transformation and evolution Aiming to be spiritual is itself a trap. Your notions of what "spiritual" is, is largely garbage. Its not an issue in God's eyes. Its Infinite Love. You're projecting 'issue' onto the situation. And then getting sucked into and trapped in your projections about social issues.

@electroBeam Isn’t an aspect of Infinite Love its continuous transformation and evolution? A crucial aspect of growth and change is questioning the status quo. I don’t think it’s inherently unspiritual to point out a social issue.

In the Science of Idiotism, cumulative integration can eventually tip the scales. One can become an enlightened Idiot as a permanent station instead of just a temporary state. The interconnectedness of all and everything is then on permanent display. To be an Idiot, one must be striving for transformation or awakening. One reason also that an egotist cannot be an Idiot is that they don't strive for transformation which helps God, who everyday, puffs and moans to keep the Universe going. An Idiot strives as well at developing the capacity for directing one's own attention in being present and alert. With the pendulum of personality on the path of knowledge and the yo yo of up and down on the ladder of Reason and the path of Being, the capacity for directing one's attention is crucial. The Idiot finds him or herself in a landscape of many moving parts. An egoist has dispersed attention and is often blinded by their own sense of clarity. They will eventually become consumed as food by Great Nature. It's so sad that they don't even know. They are asleep and don't realize it. A few of them are living the American dream. Some of them are lost in wet dreams. Some are lost in nightmares. It takes courage to be an Idiot. In addition to striving and courage, an Idiot is able to be lighthearted.

@Consciousone35 I would totally go to a Tony seminar, if you think it is just a waste of time, I don't even know what you are doing in a self-development forum. I don't know what happened in the situation you talked about but maybe she had wrong expectations about the guy, maybe she was hoping for someone to hold her hand and tell her how much he is sorry for her situation and cry together and Tony has chosen to not fuel this perspective. Every teacher has it's style, some are more aggressive than others, some can simply tell you to quit being a little bitch and that's what you needed, and another one can hug you, show you with motherly love, you feel good and nothing change. Triggering transformation in people is a lot more complex than most realize, you are going to have to touch some deep wounds and some people are not ready for it yet.

Dr Chris Bache speaks of the 'Ocean of Suffering' which he delved into over many Lsd sessions in his explorations into consciousness. He found that his experience of this Ocean of Suffering - which comprises the collective suffering of the species closely intertwined with our own individual suffering - had a therapeutic impact and that every act of healing, either large or small has an impact on the whole. The end result of this healing is a collective transformation. In response to the question, why does this experience of suffering eventually end for the individual when the reservoir of species suffering is so vast, he says: "It may be that the that given the sheer magnitude of planetary suffering, any one person is only allowed to do so much. Perhaps some cosmic oversight simply says "That's enough!", and one is released from further obligation" This makes beautiful sense. I could not see how the continued pain I experienced when using psychs could have emerged from this life-time alone. Perhaps it was the uncovering of the suffering of previous life-times or, as Bache suggests, the dipping into the collective pain of the species. This gives me the motivation to welcome all experiences that come my way.

If everything is information as I assume, then what is the body of flesh? The Bible says that the body of flesh cannot inherit the kingdom of God. Yet, from a nondual perspective the physical body and the mind are one. A Course in Miracles says that the physical body is the belief in sin made flesh: And is this passage ACIM says that the body is another order of reality than thought as merely an appearance, so that's a nondual perspective: The body of flesh then means the belief that the body is a separate object, which explains why ACIM says it's a belief in sin which means missing the mark, meaning a misperception of reality. So I take it that the body is already pure information, even from the ACIM perspective. And this is something I think many spiritual teachers miss, even nonduality teachers, by making a distinction between the physical body and spirituality. What is needed is to look into the transformation of the physical body such as described in the Law of One as going from third to fourth density. Because not only the ego needs to be integrated, also the physical body needs to be integrated, or it's an incomplete integral approach.

I guess not able to fight an oppressive regime. Oppressive governments hold people back from growth. So even if the local people are high on the spiral, it doesn't help because the government doesn't operate from that stage, these are red/blue governments that are very difficult to fight against. You will be in prison for a simple thing like freedom of speech, this limits the capacity of the population to bring change. Fear and authority suppresses any hope for transformation.

@Visionary I feel it energetically in my body, and I was similar to the process of Transformation Mastery by Julien. I went through all of the shit that he mentions in his course, and it was being manifested in my thoughts, and once I got, why they are occurring and what they really represent - puff - pattern got broken. I understand what you mean by "many dark nights" (I think I do) because of the amount of the shit I went through. But how do I truly know - "Ok, cool, the process is over, I'm done with healing and shadow work, let's get going with the purpose stuff right now"?

@28 cm unbuffed That's awesome. Happy for ya! Allow time to do its job. Do not try rushing things. Do not try dragging things. Let everything unfold naturally and effortlessly; smoothly. Rest in the knowing of who you are now. Everything will shortly realign, rearrange and readjust for you. Breathe. Let all things do themselves. Try several years of it ? I feel ya tho. It's not a pleasant spot to be in. But it's oh so worth it. I know you can already sense that. Be patient, have compassion and understanding towards the one who's going through a transformation. It knows its time.

@Opo well. I have money. I have already lived in America for some time. America gives you a drive to work hard. Succeed. Compete. Learn. Grow. Diversity in America means you learn quickly about white culture, black culture, Mexican culture, native american culture and every other culture on planet earth. Where will you get such a rich experience? American politics is interesting and gives you space to learn how to struggle against Orange Spiral as a green person and you see real life transformation towards green. America is famous for its historic record of the most progressive movements in the world.. America respects hard work. American laws are strict. You have a lot of security and freedom as an individual. Nobody can simply tell you to go back to your country. American people are very motivated to self actualization. America has tons of opportunities for self actualization and achievement in life And finally, Americans are extremely sweet and loving people. For stage Blue, Green and Yellow and Orange, you absolutely need America. You don't have a shortcut to other stages. You need to be grounded in these stages first and foremost and then move upwards. I'm only looking forward to Stage Green with some turquoise. I don't want to be a full turquoise. The thing is that if you wanna be at stage Turquoise, then you don't need any country for that, because it's more of a personal thing. You can be a stage Turquoise anywhere in the world. You can live in a mountain. Mountains are everywhere. But to be a Stage Orange or Stage Green/or Yellow, be in a country like America where human rights are valued. You have money, you have power and you get huge public support from liberals who support your Green policies. What more can you ask for? America is a battleground country for mass development. It is moving ahead at rocket speed Europe is no match. . @Opo see if you wanna be like Osho, you could have your own ranch in some mountains in India or America or Europe. But if you want Stage Green at the least, then choose America.

There is a bottom line assumption at work here. Something that you believe to be true about yourself, even though you may not recognize it as an assumption, because you live it as true. Now when you work on changing your self-and social-image, you already work from a point where that assumption of unworthiness is true. And so you argue and and manage this that you live to be true of you. Real transformation begins when you see that this assumption is non-essential to who and what you truly are. Once this is clearly seen, the belief can be dropped. So long as it remains to be a fundamental part of yourself, you will always have feelings of unworthiness in the background of your experience, no matter how much evidence to the contrary you create in your life.

Human beings can change so radically that you won't notice a single trace of a screwed past. It's possible and I have done it. I was sexually abused when I was a small child but I have gone through such a deep transformation that I don't even remember it in the daily basis anymore. The reason you can resonate with Teal Swan is because she is still broken inside, as she says it herself. But she is deeply aware of her brokenness and that's how she plays the role of a teacher so well. So we have two points here: You can totally overlook someone's f**ked up past, depending on the level of healing that the person went through You don't need to be completely healed to help others. All it takes is awareness of your own wounds. Or simply awareness in general. And of course good wording and enough empathy

Don Beck, author of "Spiral Dynamics", & Said Dawlabani, creator of MEMEnomics, walk us through the Spiral Dynamics model of understanding the evolutionary transformation of human values and cultures - and how that applies to economics. Ken Wilber Don Beck challenges Ken Wilber to Debate! From Graves' work, Beck and his colleague, Cristopher Cowan, developed the theory further and presented a structured evolutionary model of adaptive intelligence called Spiral Dynamics. Beck and Cowan first published their construct in Spiral Dynamics: Mastering Values, Leadership, and Change (Exploring the New Science of Memetics) (1996). Spiral Dynamics theory spawned much discussion and (sometimes tangential) integration of concepts by other theorists, such as Ken Wilber. In A Theory of Everything Wilber attempts to bridge business, politics, science and spirituality and show how they integrate with theories of developmental psychology, such as Spiral Dynamics Integral theory (Ken Wilber) All Quadrants All Levels (AQAL, pron. "ah-qwul"), is the basic framework of integral theory. It models human knowledge and experience with a four-quadrant grid, along the axes of "interior-exterior" and "individual-collective". According to Wilber, it is a comprehensive approach to reality, a metatheory that attempts to explain how academic disciplines and every form of knowledge and experience fit together coherently.[2]

Now olmost 3 years into the spritual path, having handful of deep spiritual and some psychedelic experiences, learning a lot of lessons, doing leo’s course (lots of gratitude to leo for helping me on my path), undergoing transformation i never took possible, radically opening my mind for things that have changed my perspective on the world for ever... i now find myself to be kind of stuck/blocked in my path and posting here on the forum to get some insights and/or help but also to introduce myself on the forum in the form of a trip report of my life. shortly about me - I was fully living in stage orange the biggest part of my life and lived completely through it while in the ultimate orange territory; the army. earlier this year i quitted my job at the army, sold my house and moved to another place to pursue my life purpose as a musician. one more reason to quit was that i didn’t resonate with my environment and colleagues anymore because i was transcending consciously and unconsciously from stage orange to stage green the last 3 years. It was holding me back. spiritual path - About 3 years ago, motivated by depressed feelings , suffering and lack of purpose i watched a no bullshit how to meditation video on youtube from leo. Since then i’ve meditated dailly. One year ago i did my first meditation retreat (unfortunately also motivated by some upcoming depressed feelings around that time). in this first 5-day meditation retreat I had one experience of everything being love and light during one meditation, it was one of the most beautiful experiences of my life at that time. it echoed on for some weeks ending with a horrific ego-backlash around oktober/november. But it left me this Huge lesson to start practicing being fully inside my body. which I’m actually still struggling with with ups and downs. 13 weeks ago I did my second 7-day meditation-retreat, i again had some beautiful experiences of everything being love and my consciousness skyrocketed for a while. I also had some experiences/memories what seems to be of past lives. Memories - The first time i started experiencing these memories was back in januari 2018 when i took some psylocibine truffles. I had a awesome trip! Learning a lot about consciousness and gained the skill (or discovered?) of sketching/drawing (with a little bit of help from M.C. Escher, i had paintings of him al around my house, escher being in my life since childhood in the form of books and various other ways since i can remember, i even had the thought one time in my trip that i was the reincarnation of Escher haha?) I always felt a huge creative force inside me my whole life but it never manifested in the way of art, only music. The following weeks I had a strong urge To draw. I was drawing dailly for hours from a place of silence, the most awesome drawings! perfectly and effortlessly without even touching a pencil once in my life before! The most complex mathematical infrastructures and perspective drawings without even doing research on it once. I now know where the name magic truffles come from... but at one point it scared the shit out of me... I was drawing memories that weren’t From me... at least not this life... But at the same time they felt mine and they were coming from a deep place inside that wasn’t my imagination. I later experienced flashbacks of these memories during a 2-cb trip and that Opened the possibility for me that there exists something like a past life. I came to realize that I probably experienced a lot during that life, even some trauma that still needs to be resolved. It may even be so that this trauma is blocking me now but i have to do more research on this topic. I’m still trying to find good recourses. Heart awakening - In the spiral dynamics videos leo points out that having a heart awakening is a great stepping point from orange to green. I Took this seriously and started doing meditation on the heart (the heartfullness way), wim hof breathing, reading books, doing psychedelic trips etc etc only to find out that I haven’t done enough research into the concept heart awakening. and i’m now facing some problems in the form of physical and mental manifestation and i think they all point to the same problem/blockage that prevents me having a heart awakening. I went to some doktors for some physical things like palpitations, migraines some neurological things tiredness/energy problems etc.. nothing weird was found and they couldn’t help me. One medical route i’m following now is lyme dissease, i’ve had around 100 harvest bug bites while in the army and had a very special psychedelic trip that confirmed this thought that i will talk about later in this report. i also started to have some mental problems like hyperventilation and fear 5 years ago I went to a psychologist 2 times and it was treated very Quickly... but it came back during my ego backlash last oktober/november. Went to another psychologist and again it was treated Very quick but i realized this treatment was just on the surface. during my life purpose course i’ve came to realize that healing/health/energy is the number one value in my list, so i have started walking this path now for a few weeks. 2 weeks ago i started with a haptotherapist/sjamanic healer. The first thing he noticed is that all my physical discomfort was all localized on the left side of my body, representing my unbalanced feminine side. One of my biggest issues in life is connection and communication with other people, this resonates with my feminine side. He send me to breathing therapy, holotropic breathing, to deal with my hyperventilation issue, im starting with that next week. I’m still figuring out other ways to heal myself and balance my feminine side. if anyone know ways i’d love to hear them. My masculinity probably have had to much of boost in the army ? Since my first meditation retreat one year ago i started to have some uncomfortable things during my meditations.. the first experience earlier this year was during a “do-nothing” meditation after a lsd trip. I felt a huge pressure in my heart area, it felt like a huge balloon helt under water and it was about to erupt, it felt like a sea of emotions and i thought I couldn’t handle it and fear came along, i pushed the experience away and forced it to stop... (at first i thought it was my physical heart and went to a doktor, had some tests but nothing out of the ordinary came out) i had this same experience again since then for about 4-5 times, everytime it feels too much and i push it away because it feels like I couldn’t handle it... Intuitively i think it has something to do with my heart chakra awakening or maybe past trauma’s. What is the best possible step i could take to deal with all this? What exercises? I’m starting holotropic breath work next week, i think that’ll help. I’m also going to do a kambo ceremony next month. And in the meditation i practice there is a exercise called cleaning that should be useful, i’m doing it at the end of each day. my girlfriend just finished reiki 2 and she could perform it on me, dont know if that is beneficial, i’m still a newbie on this field. For the physical part im starting chinese acupuncture tomorrow, this is also because ive had corona in march and still have some left over symptoms to make it all complete ? healing is definitely a huge part of my life at this moment in order to proceed with my life-purpose and life in general. Lsd and microdosing and lsa trip - lastly, i still have to tell about my last psychedelic experiences. Shit is about to get weird now... it started about 4 weeks ago i had a really bad week and bad luck around this time, and some days later when i was really down and wanted to escape from life for a while and i took a little bit of lsd and weed... i know really bad idea... but while tripping and, of course having a really bad experience! i started to experience some really high consciousness i’ve never had before... And at this place i experienced a meeting with leo and ken wilber... i don’t know if it just were hallucinations/projections of my mind or that I experienced this for real, but it happened and i remember it... one thing that i do know is that I don’t know anything and that i still have to learn a lot about everything in life, and after all my experiences nothing seems very weird anymore. I probably just tripped too unresponsible. the week after that my girlfriend was about to start with microdosing and i joined her, i started to feel better and took it seriously because i didn’t want these drops and downs anymore. I must say that it helped me a lot the last days and weeks and i starting to feel myself again and have energy for life and my purpose in life. And one interesting thing to notice is how it affected my next lsa trip. 2 weeks ago i did a lsa trip, baby Hawaiian woodrose, with my girlfriend. don’t underestimate these little seeds! ?... we both took 550mg prepared capsules. Our location was in nature, we were staying on a camping ground for 3 days. The second day we took the capsules in the morning and left for a unforgettable hike in nature, my intention was “nature as mentor” yep that simple... My girlfriend’s intention was about finding her power in life, and we were about to get answers to this and even more in very profound ways! as we were walking i was becoming very contemplative and philosophical about the life and dead cycle and our consciousness was growing very subtle. Our trip was going very smoothly and mother nature was leading us at a very subtle way. At one point we were standing on a sightseeing point and we felt really small, our ego’s began to melt down. my girlfriend was undergoing a very smooth ego death. I, on the other hand, was struggling with surrender a lot! My girlfriend noticed a pattern of our last few trips and says i always have this on the same point of out trip. I can’t seem to find the problem but she sees it exactly unfolding every time. An half hour went by and i was still struggling with my surrender but suddenly it smashes me in the face and the unexplainable became explained, my consciousness expanded and my ego dissolved! I was laughing and screaming because it felt so good and it was finally there, all of universal wisdom was raining down on me, it felt amazing! After some time my girlfriend and i went back to our camping place and my ego was slowly returning into place and there it was... i started to get hyperventilation and a panic attack on the way back... the same one i’ve described before that is haunting me for a while... it came with a lot of physical discomfort and i thought i was dying, until i realized it was just a panic attack, when we were back inside the tent i felt bad... really bad! I had no energy and a lot of pain... in past trips with my girlfriend we discovered that my girlfriend has some energetic power while tripping and she can kind of cure my pain and discomfort at an energy level... so she was performing her things on me and it started to help... i felt better. just when i thought it couldn’t be more profound, we both started to feel a presence of someone else joining us. It all happened very fast and smooth. It was my grandmother who past away when i was a kid, unfortunately i never really got to know her...until now. She told us she was helping me already for a really long time and was giving me signs And directions in my life, everytime i asked for help the last weeks and months for my pain and discomfort and suffering she was actually helping me! My girlfriend didn’t knew my grandmother or knew anything about her but she was speaking for her, at the same time i could also feel her words in my body... the recognition at that moment is was absolutely the most beautiful experience of my life! I was finally crying after years of holding my tears back and it felt amazing to finally release it. My grandmother told me she was happy that I finally recognized her and that she was with me all the time and that she was leaving signs and signals, she told me that she was helping my mother too and she finished by saying that I absolutely need to keep practicing my gratitude! I never believed in things like these but my open mindedness got stretched a lot that moment. After this experience my girlfriend told me that leo was also here and he was looking self fullfilled, probably a projection of my mind or something because leo is an important part of my spiritual journey and personal development. After this was finished we moved a little and saw something moving on our bed... harvest bugs. in dutch they are called teek/teken. Translated it means “sign/signs”. It was the answer i had in my mind that i probably have lyme-disease showed in a horrible but clear way ?.... at least for me motivation to follow the path of healing. it was a really deep and profound spiritual experience. i just felt i needed to post this here, i hope you’ve enjoyed my writing. And i hope someone can learn something from my story. Thanks to everybody for sharing this thing together we call life. And lastly thanks to Leo for all the teachings and work that you do.

There's too much to share... Here I go though: The world is a mirror and doorway to yourself. Forgiveness will free you. Killing someone is killing yourself. Judging someone is judging yourself. Loving someone is loving yourself. Love is the only thing worth living for. All will pass. Life is a journey of transformation meant to grow your capacity to accept and love yourself, and indirectly everyone else. God does exist. He is the clarity and light that sits in silence within your mind. We are meant to fulfill the direction the light/God takes us. Ego is Good especially when it is aligned with Love. There is a time for everything. Everything exists within itself, for itself. if you close your eyes, you open another.

@Demeter Eventually yes, but the process of transformation was extremely disruptive. I don't imagine I could have completed a PHD course in the 5-7 year period it lasted. I definitely have a much sharper mind and better memory, than I used to, but I would not recommend raising your Kundalini for that reason alone, it is a long slog to get there. However, just meditating in general and keeping fit physically, coupled with an appropriate diet, should do the trick. Brain tissue is mostly Cholesterol, so eating plenty of eggs, dairy and fish should help keep your brain power up. I'm not aware of any psychedelics that would give you a brain upgrade, they serve a different purpose, which is mostly to connect you to the spirit world and to help you realise your true nature.

@Rilles For me, every glimpse fades after a couple of hours. It always leaves me with "This is not quite it". It has kinda become a joke that I tell myself in many situations even though its more a bitter realization - "This is not quite it". I dont expect the lasting transformation to have a significant effect on my feelings. At least I still hope it gets myself out of my own way in everyday life. Would be a huge relief.

Documentation of transforming my career to be about My life purpose. Current life purpose as of now: LP Statement: Design and share methods, systems and techniques for accessing and embodying bliss, love and insight/wisdom/intelligence. Domain of Mastery: Meditation, Contemplation, other spiritual methods for accessing bliss, love and wisdom. Medium: to be determined. Goals: 1. Maintain a consistent habit of at least 2 hours of high quality meditation. 2. Eat at most 3 meals a day. All meals fall under 50 carbs a day. 3. Read 30 minutes a day on shamanic or magick techniques. Apply shamanic or magick techniques for at least 30 minutes a day. Explore whether these methods contribute to your LP. 4. Replace procrastination with mindfulness meditation or strict contemplation. 5. Go to the gym at least 6x a week. Interesting thoughts today: 1. problem solving these days are just a more concrete, but more indirect way of accessing divine bliss, love and wisdom. For example software engineering is an inefficient, indirect but more concrete way of accessing bliss (as it solves a problem for a person, just in a small way).

“If there’s a book that you want to read, but it hasn’t been written yet, then you must write it.” i find trouble finding a book telling me how to love myself, what it means to love myself, and how to go about it, the benefits also a book for self-transformation maybe they're out there? but i haven't found one that i've resonated with yet