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About Toby

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  1. How long has your "life coach" been working with people?
  2. Could you say what you DO regarding your spiritual / psychological path? Because there are certain practices / behaviours I would not do in your situation as I understand it. For example: I wouldn't do too much meditation, any kind of breathwork, cold showers, too many different spiritual teachers / meetings and so on...
  3. Well, I can only say I read probably over 1000 books about psychology, spirituality, self-help and I can only say this is a book for you to read. All of what you write is classic for developmental trauma: The resistance / unwillingness to go into contact. Preferring to find a spiritual solution. The memory-loss and anxiety / phobia while in contact. The distortion that you will never find a relationship. The excuses. The inherent logic in your world-view. The infant needs you project into intimate relationships. The aggression how you meet any recommendation. The lack of (so called) safe relationships in the upbringing. All these things are classic and written about in this book.
  4. Ok, go and read this book:
  5. Ok, and what is the source of your condition? Do you have some sort of Autism? Some kind of phobia? Some kind of trauma? Or are you just asexual?
  6. So you want a relationship without talking? How would that be possible?
  7. But why don't you go out and speak to like 100 women a day instead of wasting hours on meditation instead? Wouldn't it be way easier to be in a relationship then doing all this spiritual work?
  8. Then why are you single if having a partner is the source of happiness (in your opinion)?
  9. This is a classic trauma symptom. In trauma (especially developmental trauma) the "social engagement system" switches off. It's not possible to socially relate from that space (while being triggered). Recommended reading: Stephen Porges, Laurence Heller, Peter Levine
  10. Sounds a bit like you are afraid of your and the dude's unconscious patterns that are triggered within the relationship. So you wait for yourself and / or the dude to be perfect before considering a relationship. Probably expectation is unrealistic imo.
  11. I had this about 11 years ago exactly when - supposedly - my kundalini got awakened. lasted for like 1-2 months. never had anything like that since. (and also not before that. no changes in surroundings)
  12. oh, ok... although I don't think Adyashanti "wrote" any book with him. Resurrecting Jesus is a book based on a talk at sounds true (Tami Simon) afair.