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Great book. Read it twice. Highly recommended. I love how he explained the difference between conventional therapy that deals with ego and how it gets you nowhere, and letting go method which is true way to spirituality and transformation.

Very instructive material on God from the perspective of fully transitioning from awakening or God-consciousness, to enlightenment, or in her terminology, God to Godhead; a great read: https://o-meditation.com/2009/10/16/from-the-unitive-state-to-no-self-bernadette-roberts/ After enlightenment there's no inner world or outer divine anymore. Excerpt: Stephan: How did you discover the further stage, which you call the experience of no-self? Bernadette: That occurred unexpectedly some 25 years after the transforming process. The divine center – the coin, or “true self” – suddenly disappeared, and without center or circumference there is no self, and no divine. Our subjective life of experience is over – the passage is finished. I had never heard of such a possibility or happening. Obviously there is far more to the elusive experience we call self than just the ego. The paradox of our passage is that we really do not know what self or consciousness is, so long as we are living it, or are it. The true nature of self can only be fully disclosed when it is gone, when there is no self. One outcome, then, of the no-self experience is the disclosure of the true nature of self or consciousness. As it turns out, self is the entire system of consciousness, from the unconscious to God-consciousness, the entire dimension of human knowledge and feeling-experience. Because the terms “self” and “consciousness” express the same experiences (nothing can be said of one that cannot be said of the other), they are only definable in the terms of “experience”. Every other definition is conjecture and speculation. No-self, then, means no-consciousness. If this is shocking to some people, it is only because they do not know the true nature of consciousness. Sometimes we get so caught up in the content of consciousness, we forget that consciousness is also a somatic function of the physical body, and, like every such function, it is not eternal. Perhaps we would do better searching for the divine in our bodies than amid the content and experience of consciousness. Stephan: How does one move from “transforming union” to the experience of no-self? What is the path like? Bernadette: We can only see a path in retrospect. Once we come to the state of oneness, we can go no further with the inward journey. The divine center is the innermost “point”, beyond which we cannot go at this time. Having reached this point, the movement of our journey turns around and begins to move outward – the center is expanding outward. To see how this works, imagine self, or consciousness, as a circular piece of paper. The initial center is the ego, the particular energy we call “will” or volitional faculty, which can either be turned outward, toward itself, or inward, toward the divine ground, which underlies the center of the paper. When, from our side of consciousness, we can do no more to reach this ground, the divine takes the initiative and breaks through the center, shattering the ego like an arrow shot through the center of being. The result is a dark hole in ourselves and the feeling of terrible void and emptiness. This breakthrough demands a restructuring or change of consciousness, and this change is the true nature of the transforming process. Although this transformation culminates in true human maturity, it is not man’s final state. The whole purpose of oneness is to move us on to a more final state. To understand what happens next, we have to keep cutting larger holes in the paper, expanding the center until only the barest rim or circumference remains. One more expansion of the divine center and the boundaries of consciousness or self fall away. From this illustration we can see how the ultimate fulfillment of consciousness, or self, is no-consciousness, or no-self. The path from oneness to no-oneness is an egoless one and is therefore devoid of ego-satisfaction. Despite the unchanging center of peace and joy, the events of life may not be peaceful or joyful at all. With no ego-gratification at the center and no divine joy on the surface, this part of the journey is not easy. Heroic acts of selflessness are required to come to the end of self, acts comparable to cutting ever-larger holes in the paper – acts, that is, that bring no return to the self whatsoever. The major temptation to be overcome in this period is the temptation to fall for one of the subtle but powerful archetypes of the collective consciousness. As I see it, in the transforming process we only come to terms with the archetypes of the personal unconscious; the archetypes of the collective consciousness are reserved for individuals in the state of oneness, because those archetypes are powers or energies of that state. Jung felt that these archetypes were unlimited; but in fact, there is only one true archetype, and that archetype is self. What is unlimited are the various masks or roles self is tempted to play in the state of oneness – savior, prophet, healer, martyr, Mother Earth, you name it. They are all temptations to seize power for ourselves, to think ourselves to be whatever the mask or role may be. In the state of oneness, both Christ and Buddha were tempted in this manner, but they held to the “ground” that they knew to be devoid of all such energies. This ground is a “stillpoint”, not a moving energy-point. Unmasking these energies, seeing them as ruses of the self, is the particular task to be accomplished or hurdle to be overcome in the state of oneness. We cannot come to the ending of self until we have finally seen through these archetypes and can no longer be moved by any of them. So the path from oneness to no-oneness is a life that is choicelessly devoid of ego-satisfaction; a life of unmasking the energies of self and all the divine roles it is tempted to play. It is hard to call this life a “path”, yet it is the only way to get to the end of our journey. Stephan: In The Experience of No-Self you talk at great length about your experience of the dropping away or loss of self. Could you briefly describe this experience and the events that led up to it? I was particularly struck by your statement “I realized I no longer had a ‘within’ at all.” For so many of us, the spiritual life is experienced as an “inner life” – yet the great saints and sages have talked about going beyond any sense of inwardness. Bernadette: Your observation strikes me as particularly astute; most people miss the point. You have actually put your finger on the key factor that distinguishes between the state of oneness and the state of no-oneness, between self and no-self. So long as self remains, there will always be a “center”. Few people realize that not only is the center responsible for their interior experiences of energy, emotion, and feeling, but also, underlying these, the center is our continuous, mysterious experience of “life” and “being”. Because this experience is more pervasive than our other experiences, we may not think of “life” and “being” as an interior experience. Even in the state of oneness, we tend to forget that our experience of “being” originates in the divine center, where it is one with divine life and being. We have become so used to living from this center that we feel no need to remember it, to mentally focus on it, look within, or even think about it. Despite this fact, however, the center remains; it is the epicenter of our experience of life and being, which gives rise to our experiential energies and various feelings. If this center suddenly dissolves and disappears, the experiences of life, being, energy, feeling and so on come to an end, because there is no “within” any more. And without a “within”, there is no subjective, psychological, or spiritual life remaining – no experience of life at all. Our subjective life is over and done with. But now, without center and circumference, where is the divine? To get hold of this situation, imagine consciousness as a balloon filled with, and suspended in divine air. The balloon experiences the divine as immanent, “in” itself, as well as transcendent, beyond or outside itself. This is the experience of the divine in ourselves and ourselves in the divine; in the state of oneness, Christ is often seen as the balloon (ourselves), completing this trinitarian experience. But what makes this whole experience possible – the divine as both immanent and transcendent – is obviously the balloon, i.e. consciousness or self. Consciousness sets up the divisions of within and without, spirit and matter, body and soul, immanent and transcendent; in fact, consciousness is responsible for every division we know of. But what if we pop the balloon – or better, cause it to vanish like a bubble that leaves no residue. All that remains is divine air. There is no divine in anything, there is no divine transcendence or beyond anything, nor is the divine anything. We cannot point to anything or anyone and say, “This or that is divine”. So the divine is all – all but consciousness or self, which created the division in the first place. As long as consciousness remains however, it does not hide the divine, nor is it ever separated from it. In Christian terms, the divine known to consciousness and experienced by it as immanent and transcendent is called God; the divine as it exists prior to consciousness and after consciousness is gone is called Godhead. Obviously, what accounts for the difference between God and Godhead is the balloon or bubble – self or consciousness. As long as any subjective self remains, a center remains; and so, too, does the sense of interiority.

Don't know if I've written about this before here - probably - tulpa creation. What is a tulpa? The concept is basically an imaginary friend on steroids. You create and maintain a separate entity - normally a person - using thought alone. See Wikipedia for more. I don't know why exactly the idea appeals to me, after all I'm in 40's not my 00's . I think it ties in with my philosophy of thinking that we should all regularly inhabit different characters, as a way to expand ourselves, and to not get too stuck in ourselves. To be honest this is what we all already do (see earlier posts), so the only difference here in creating a tulpa is doing it consciously rather than unconciously. Effectively, you are already a bunch of thought-forms vying for attention and control of your body. Further to this, everyone in your life - male and female - is also a thought-form. Unconsciously created tulpas abound rattling around inside you. I thought I would create a female tulpa, because why not? Ok, well this is kind of related to my earlier phase of needing to work through what feminity meant for myself (yes I'm male) - we're all a balance of feminine and masculine qualities - whatever they are. Earlier I was interested in tipping the scales and embodying or expressing what I thought were more feminine qualities. Creating a female tulpa would allow me a chance of feminine creative expression even if just in thought. I have plenty of material to work from, half the people in the world are feminine. I'm not sure where exactly this need to explore a more feminine identity comes from, it's certainly not from sexual orientation (men don't turn me on, but I can appreciate a good looking one and why he's good looking). However, I was often confused for a girl when I was very young (longish hair), I have enjoyed the odd bit of cross-dressing (but hadn't done a huge amount of it). I was a little bit of a mummy's boy but not that much. In my twenties or thirties I was questioned on occasion whether I was gay or bi (nope) - even my own sister wanted me to work it out by experimenting, which I did and I definitely wasn't. This questioning made me wonder what about my behaviour made people think I was. In my forties I've worked hard to be more masculine in my character to stop this confusion in people; especially not to put off potential women I was interested in. This is not something I've ever spoken about to anyone. Lucky you, you're the first or at least in the low tens! I do think that I'm lost translation though. Being much more masculine just isn't really me, it's just a show. I wouldn't go so far as to say it's inauthentic, because I am being an authentic masculine version of myself. It's just that it takes conscious maintenance and suppression of what I used to think were "natural" expressions of my character. So here we are. In a way the female tulpa perhaps would be the more extreme version of that younger more femininely balanced self. She would have to be the female me. I have a good template as I have a sister! But we are quite different characters, so I can't just steal her character for myself - it's also kind of creepy to do that - the thought-form I already have of my sister doesn't need corruption. But despite our differences we are the closest two humans in terms of upbringing and some of our thought patterns and behaviours. Name your tulpa. I originally called her Christine, but wavered and eventually settled on Charlotte (I like CH right?). She kind of needed her own mind and body shape, but to be averagely me. When I first tried I found the maintenance side of the tulpa onerous. My visual imagination is good, but imagining a whole being from nothing except some vague template I found to be very tough. I had a long hiatus where I just forgot about the whole thing. But the idea didn't really go away. In adjusting myself to be more masculine the more feminine side of me screamed louder. Life is like that, some things are impossible to ignore and like it or not eventually you have to deal with it somehow. When I came across hypnosis videos online, there were various "feminine transformation" videos, for men I presume. The sheer fact it even grabbed my attention spoke to me. I'm a curious sort so I tried it out and it had a curious effect on me. What I had missed with the tulpa creation is what I should have done all along and that is: embodiment. After all, it was embodiment of more feminine qualities that I was missing in the first place and the reason for the tulpa creation. Embodiment is far more potent because you become the character, albeit a female character in a male body. It allowed me to explore the tulpa more fully. Although, I may have unconsciously shied away from what I felt could be a slippery slope - to what, I don't know. Some of the videos were straight become a woman type affairs. Some of them were more to do with cross-dressing. Knowing NLP well enough, I anchored Charlotte (the name) to these hypnotic moments of feminine embodiment so I could "recall" her more quickly. In a strange twist (the universe provides) I temporarily became the owner of a bunch of clothing which I promised to take to charity. I took the opportunity to actually cross-dress, specifically to fill out the Charlotte character. You really are the first know this, and as you can imagine it's odd spilling my guts like this on many levels. It's giving me the outlet I need to explore more feminine characteristics and it feels like a holiday from my normally straightjacketed-everyday-masculine self. How far am I going to push it? I don't know, it's quite possibly just a phase and I'll get bored with it. Maybe when I feel I've rebalanced myself again and can put an acceptable version of myself for public consumption it will end (acceptable to me and to others). What it also allows me to do is experiment with being someone else, albeit in private, but my hope is that the good parts of that experimentation will spill over into @LastThursday and go some way to "fixing" parts of me I don't like or "improving" other parts. I haven't actively bought any female clothing; not sure I will. I have bought nail varnish. I am very very weary about being caught out cross-dressing. Already I've probably been caught with a neighbour peering through my window from across the way. Part of me doesn't GAF, part of me really does. The social stigma is just too much. Definitely my friends can't know and neither can my family not because I don't think they wouldn't be accommodating, but because I'd never hear the end of it and I don't want to be identified by it. I also have a social image to upkeep unfortunately. In a bizarre sense I feel I'm not really cross-dressing but more like dressing a shop dummy called Charlotte in order to bring her to life. It is definitely fun and strangely cathartic though. Hey ho.

Christ is not Jesus’s last name,,,,,, https://cac.org/anointing-with-love-2019-04-10/ https://cac.org/wisdom-jesus-weekly-summary-2017-04-15/ Jesus was not a priest or a prophet in the usual sense of those terms. Rather, he was a wisdom teacher. He stayed close to the ground of wisdom: the transformation of human consciousness.

@DocWatts I watched and heard this perspective from Chomsky before right around the time I started learning and finding of libertarian socialism and socialism, in general, a few years ago. 1. I admit I feel a slight anti-white Western liberal cringe and bias when I hear this seemingly urbanite liberal white girl who just got into revolutionary theory and politics pose a question to Chomsky about Lenin's legacy in such a hyperactive and excited tone and voice. It's cute but I get LARPy vibes from her, though better that than nothing for her and other young people there starting to independently to learn on their own about the history of marxism and socialism to start deprogramming themselves and forming their own autonomous interpretative worldviews and more critical thought patterns based on their own reading, insights, and literature from the biases, prejudices, and assumptions that the mainstream western corporate media ingrains in its audiences. 2. I am not defending now or advocating in my understanding for the centralized version of the Soviet Union under Stalin and later others, though I think at the time it performed despite its many terrors and horrors that it committed on its population an overall modernization and civilizational uplifting of the people of Eastern Europe free from becoming victims of external exploitation, stagnation and the inability to develop and grow on their own under the international system of capitalist unequal exchange (Zizek quotes in the text I posted above that the Soviet leaders including Stalin viewed it this way, though Stalin performed it in a more autocratic, centralized and imperialist way towards other nations). 3. Much of the autocratization and centralization of the Soviet Union happened under Stalin: ''The direction in which Stalin was already heading is clear from his proposal that the government of Soviet Russia should also be the government of the other five republics (Ukraine, Belarus, Azerbaijan, Armenia, and Georgia): If the present decision is confirmed by the Central Committee of the RCP, it will not be made public, but communicated to the Central Committees of the Republics for circulation among the Soviet organs, the Central Executive Committees, or the Congresses of the Soviets of the said Republics before the convocation of the All-Russian Congress of the Soviets, where it will be declared to be the wish of these Republics. The interaction of the higher authority, the Central Committee, with its base was thus abolished: the higher authority now simply imposed its will. To add insult to injury, the Central Committee decided what the base would ask the higher authority to enact as if it were its own wish.'' 4. Zizek already addressed in the article where Lenin diverged from Rosa on the question of none necessity of progressive forces to lead the new states of some undeveloped countries and the inability of people to become libertarian right away without first: the idea of a modest, "realistic" project for Bolshevism. Because of the economic under-development and cultural backwardness of the Russian masses, he argues, there is no way for Russia to "pass directly to socialism": all that Soviet power can do is to combine the moderate politics of "state capitalism" with the intense cultural education of the peasant masses – not the brainwashing of propaganda, but a patient, gradual imposition of civilized standards. Facts and figures revealed "what a vast amount of urgent spadework we still have to do to reach the standard of an ordinary west European civilized country … We must bear in mind the semi-Asiatic ignorance from which we have not yet extricated ourselves," he wrote. 5. On this note that he said we should agree with the fascists that it wasn't socialism but the destruction of it to avoid their strawman's and projections, but I would remind him of this quote from Zizek what disservice that does for the progressive and humanistic legacy it did for some nations of Eastern Europe and what opportunism that supplies for the right-wing reactionary movements: ''One of the signs of this regression is a request often heard on the new European right for a more "balanced" view of the two "extremisms", the right and the left. We are repeatedly told that one should treat the extreme left (communism) the same way that Europe after the second world war treated the extreme right (the defeated fascists). But in reality, there is no balance here: the equation of fascism and communism secretly privileges fascism. Thus the right is hard to argue that fascism copied communism: before becoming a fascist, Mussolini was a socialist; Hitler, too, was a National Socialist; concentration camps and genocidal violence were features of the Soviet Union a decade before Nazis resorted to them; the annihilation of the Jews has a clear precedent in the annihilation of the class enemy, etc. The point of these arguments is to assert that moderate fascism was a justified response to the communist threat (a point made long ago by Ernst Nolte in his defense of Heidegger’s involvement with Nazism). In Slovenia, the right is advocating the rehabilitation of the anti-communist Home Guard which fought the partisans during the second world war: they made the difficult choice to collaborate with the Nazis in order to thwart the much greater evil of communism.'' I plan to read starting from the basics using Wolff as a reference in Understanding Marxism and Understanding Socialism when I get to it in my free time. 6. Also on the final note it was in then developed industrialized civilized countries such as Germany seen ripe for socialist transformation according to orthodox Marxists that the destruction of socialism also took place that the German Social Democrats voted on the war credits to send the German proletariat into an imperialist war on behalf of the German ruling class and arranged for the assassination of the leaders of the Spartacist Socialist Movement Liebknecht and Luxemburg.

Hello, This is a trip report of my Ayahuasca ceremony. I won't dive into the setting details, other than stating that it was in nature with a group and a shaman. After drinking the first cup, it was obvious that the medicine works by releasing the initial layers of unconscious mind into Consciousness. This is observed by sensing that the flow of energy in the body (whether physical, emotional or energy sense of the body) is more balanced. This observation is especially noticeable in the "Chakras", like between the eyebrows, in the center of the chest, solar plexus and more. This sense of energy flow was accompanied by complex Psychedelic visuals, that cannot be described by me other than the sense of purifying thoughts and beliefs form the unconscious mind. If I push the envelope on my creativity, I would describe the visuals as emotionally geometric shapes the resembles the visual representation of suppressing thoughts, feelings and emotions. As more and more suppressed thought is brought to surface, nauseous and nasty feelings in the body are felt, which is reasonable if the medicine oblige you to face your shadow and feel it. All and all, the first cup is quite manageable, even though it requires coping with some truth regarding the hidden aspects of our adopted identity. However, the second cup is where the real work knocked on my door and asked for answers. Ready? So after 'excavating' the initial layers of the shadow, it is time to face our most hidden and obnoxious thoughts and beliefs regarding our self and others. This is where I was forced to meet with the deep traumatic events of my life, and the conceptual architecture that erected as a result of this traumas. The deep layers of our subconscious is where fear, guilt, shame, hurt, dishonesty, illusion and attachment lurks. Encountering those aspect of my shadow was extremely painful to swallow, almost unbearable. It wouldn't surprise you that this is the part where most people are crying from the depth of the pain the reside in their emotional heart, and emit unreasonable voices of disgust and terror having to face shame and guilt, and of course, vomit their intestines out. This is purification of both body and mind, which are ultimately two sides to the same coin. During purification and afterwards deep insight regarding thoughts and beliefs can be gleaned, and it becomes obvious that every thought we hold affects the body, that in some way the thought form wishes to materialize in the body. For me, it was no different. Childhood trauma made me cry and emit voices of sheer helplessness due to feelings of rejection, shame and guilt. This was accompanied for me by extremely complex visuals both in shape and color, which I lack the ability to describe with words. Finally, I had to face the belief that I am this specific body-mind. I was "shown" that this is an illusion, that who I really am isn't some specific self, but both this self and every other self. In some weird way I cannot explain, I had visuals that showed me how self and other complete each other and cannot exist one without the other. Every experience of my self was possible only due to the experience of others, and vice versa. Even thought the distinction between self and other seem solid and separated, it is an illusion. The distinction between experiencing only one mind and experiencing another's mind is what enables the Self to experience different minds. This was extremely daunting for the attachment to the mind, which I sensed as some deep pain for being deluded so long. I cried. I realized that I could never hide aspects of my self from others, because I am others so the only one I am hiding from is me, which is a paradox. It is impossible to hide from You, because You is all there is, and You know when the self is hiding. Whenever we manipulate an other, whether it is by lying, misrepresenting, affectations, etc., we are only manipulating our self. The same goes, of course, for hurting or judging the 'other'. Thinking of our Being as some specific self is an illusion, a trick of mind, an attachment that distort the Truth. After realizing that the body-mind is not even a blip in existence, that who I am isn't this body-mind, I experienced a sensation of being reborn. I was relieved completely of my shadow and attachment to thought. I could not care less what others think of me, I only wanted to hug them and tell them that I love them. The perceptions of the body sensations and the sky in night was of pure bliss, joy and love, as in being grateful for just existing. I could not fathom that such sensations of freedom can be felt. Breathing was deep and profound, penetrating every particle of my being and the nervous system felt rejoiced, renewed and "electrical". I could sense profound sense of divine energy between my eyebrows for I finally saw reality for what is is. The magnitude of my enthusiasm and astonishment was out of this world, and I could not hold my self from saying repeatedly: Wow, wow, wow. To wrap things up, I would say that Ayahuasca differs from the classic Psychedelics not only because it is DMT which enables to dive deep into our shadow or unconscious mind, but allow us to flood the unconscious to the conscious long enough so we can see all of our hidden delusions and emotions. Mix this with the shamans music and way of touching our hidden and sensitive aspects of our self, and you get a profound experience. Don't get me wrong, Psilocybin and LSD can and probably will expose your subconscious, but usually not to depths of Ayahuasca. As for DMT in it's freebase form, the trip is usually too fast and too complex to glean serious insight regarding self and mind. But it is nice to make you curious. I would also say that if you "cleaned" your subconscious, than your trips will probably be lucid and without all this repressed emotions and horrific visuals. This is probably rare amongst human beings because we tend to be selfish and dishonest, so only mature and extremely honest individuals will have "lite" subconscious. Regarding practices such as meditation and contemplation, I cannot deny their ability to penetrate our hidden aspects, but if you want to reach the bottom of the subconscious, the root of the false self, they require intense focus and commitment. I really hope this post helped you in some way. Ayahuasca can be extremely complex and emotionally disturbing experience. But it can also mature you a lot, bring modesty to the self, and motivate transformation. It is also a heart opening trip because you can learn the deep truth regarding the illusion of being a specific self, which in turn weakens the attachment to mind and body. Much love

@Tyler Durden Cool thread, read through your discussion with BenG. Unfortunately, being able to change reality in the way you wish, at least without throwing a potentially dangerous formula for HPPD into the mix, is magical thinking. Spirituality is more about changing your relationship to reality than bending reality to your will. There's a great scene from the matrix about just this, actually. https://youtu.be/uAXtO5dMqEI Fortunately, you won't physically die if this happens. However, it can certainly feel like you're forgetting large chunks of information about yourself. This forgetting is part of a metaphysical transformation that some, who've gone through the process, report to have "felt like dying". You aren't dying. If it makes you feel more comfortable with the process, which has a long track record of getting pretty creepy at times, try reframing it. For example, you could think of it like deleting the cookies and clearing the cache on your web browser, so that it runs faster. Not so scary now. Same old browser, right? Alternatively, you could think of the information you're forgetting as having been getting in the way of your remembering something else which will radically improve your luck in ways that just about everything else in life can't quite. For the best results, don't worry so much about getting the next great reframe from Leo or your other teachers, and just get creative! If you have the energy, make it a game to see how you can reframe unsightly situations in novel ways that you find personally empowering. When you get tired and don't want to play anymore, recall something simple that gives you just a little more peace of mind in the next moment. It's perfectly fine that you're asking these types of questions. And don't beat yourself up for having physical insecurities. The big old wide open void of forgetting is our pal on the spiritual path, and when you're ready to move on, she'll take good care of all these woes for ya. Back to the bad news. You need to stop looking back if you want to be able to sprint fast enough for long enough to totally leave your problems in the dust. Knowing how much pain they cause is a step in the right direction, and fully feeling pain might make a good next step. You can't wake up and live the rest of your life in someone else's body, but you absolutely can enjoy the body you've got. Godspeed, Tyler.

With Stuff like David R Hawkins and Julien Blanc's Transformation Mastery - do we not think that by going out and approaching but also by putting our awareness on those sensations of fear and/or journaling about those feelings of fear, we can reduce our approach anxiety/general social anxiety more permanently overtime? Julien Blanc claims he doesn't need to get 'in state' anymore, he is naturally in state because he isn't resistant to the sensations in his body.

I too am an American (living in New York) who is deeply disturbed by what is happening to my country. My own approach as a private citizen -- for whatever it is worth -- is to be kind, to be gentle, to speak truth to power when necessary, but to generally listen before speaking, and to seek consensus in whatever modest form it can take. I believe our country is on the verge of a very difficult cultural transformation (from Orange to Green, in the language of Spiral Dynamics), and we are as like gardeners tending to a plant that is ailing. This task requires a great amount of sensitivity and skillfulness. So aside from voting responsibly and supporting political changes that open the door to greater democratic representation, I think the key is to be present as fully as possible.

It definitely happens and will more than likely occur again even after this phase of anxiety is released. This is the process of purification, the mind slowly training itself to be at peace in the midst of pain or pleasure without craving and aversion. Long story short, sounds like you’re right on track! As far as strategies to help soften these kinds of phases of practice, 1) A shamatha focus rather than vipassana or open awareness. Focusing on feelings of bliss, happiness, contentment, and equanimity while following a meditation object like the breath sensations at the nostrils or whole body. 2) You can try a short breathwork session before a sit. Ive found doing anywhere from 2-5 mins of wim hof style breathing followed by holding my breath as long as possible afterwords to be extremely grounding and energetically clearing before meditation. 3) Throw in walking meditation. These can be very rejuvenating when formal seated practice becomes too intense. 4) Intentionally scale back practice. If 10 mins is all you feel called for, no reason to “should all over yourself” into thinking you need more. 1 minute of formal practice is better than none. Id keep the daily consistency, no matter how small. 5) Try meditating with meditative music or sound bowls. Can be very healing and help dissipate and transform the anxiety energy. 6) Listening to guided meditations. The only guided meditations Ill listen to are from a YouTube channel called Samaneri Jayasara, which is about as enlightening as guided meditations can be. 7) Endure, push through, bring equanimity and truth even to these sensations. At the end of the day, all moments are moments of truth and freedom. So even if we find relief through transformation, the process of purifying the mind means we will eventually be able to sit in sensations of anxiety with no issues.

Agreed.... as Gandhi observed it is only experience that changes the will... theoretical learning is usefull but it cannot bring transformation... we have to act in the real world and take real risks to build personal empowerment...

One thing that helps with the being in core vibration at all times is recognizing the shift from “forcing” to “flowing” can be instantaneous to a mind that sees reality deeply. We can literally shift up and down the emotional scale at will. The more trained, unified and clear the mind is (cultivated most effectively through meditation and mindfulness), the more quickly this shift can occur. Another crucial point about this kind of mind akido is that the “shift” that occurs does not always create the downstream “in flow” or “in vibration” feelings immediately. There can at times be a lag in the time it takes for the new momentum to build, the immediate shift in vibration we’re looking for is not in the manifest feelings (although again these too can be subject to immediate transformation), but an immediate shift in the context holding emotions, which is actually more powerful, as this context is actually the space creating reality and at the deepest levels, all of reality. The emotions and being “in state” are just downstream by products. After all, sometimes being moody and depressed is exactly where we need to be to be at our best and in state, when we hold this topic holistically and maturely.

@HypnoticMagician I feel the opposite it would gain more. If you really want to play advocatus diaboli play it with a bit more mindfulness. I love criticism, yet what you wrote is sheer stupidity and myopia. I am better off doing the stuff instead of receiving that kind of feedback. What you are saying stuff that happend in my life would basically drive you to suicide for me you are just some rando online. I don't think commenting me is going to work for you. Just stop it. Writting j.k like a 12 y.o apologizing for brat like behaviour using this nasty kind of fantasy language. I don't know just give others feedback who are worse off than me. Your opinion to me is as close to worthless as it gets. The amount of assumptions you make is horrible. Go troll someone else. I care about results and not about your philosophy of things. What kind of feedback is this? The way you type almost tells me everything about you. So, just go through your transformation. Talking about assumptions.

changing bad habits for good ones is haaard... for me at least... in many ways, success and fulfilment in life is really a question of what behaviours and patterns I have effectively habituated... for me it was and is incredibly important to have support and accountability when trying to shed old habits and develop new ones... willpower alone is rarely enough - the whiteknuckle approach to personal transformation has 'got no legs' Good luck my friend! Lucas

Would like to quote Adyashanti here: "As soon as you can let go of what was, and the way you thought it was going to be, and who you thought you were going to be, how that was going to secure everything. The sooner you let go of that, even thought it’s kind of behind you already…. the sooner you allow it to be gone, because you see you are transforming…." "You know those romantic ideas of the caterpillar becoming a butterfly…. used in spiritual books, the caterpillar goes into the cocoon and becomes a butterfly. What happens in that cocoon? The caterpillar goes “what the hell, it was not a good idea to weave this damn thing. This is not a cocoon, it’s a coffin.” The transformation starts to happen. “Oh my God, I am not going to be the same person I was when this finishes.” You don’t know where it’s going. There is no relation between a caterpillar and a butterfly. A butterfly is not a flying caterpillar. Caterpillars and butterflies don’t have much to do with each other. There is a transformation at the seat of your consciousness that happens. And the transformation is like what I am describing. As it is happening, there is a fear and reaching back to how it was. The way forward seems so blind, doesn’t it? You have no idea. You are moving into a new way of being that you have no operating manual for. You had a good operating manual for the dream state. Highly functional, illusory egoic self. At least you knew how to function in the dream state. That makes it even more weird, when that whole thing starts to transform. I understand that. Don’t imagine that where you feel yourself to be now…. that’s not the destination point. You are already moving through it. You can only go through it, there is no going back."

Just stop, my friend. Just stop. You don't need to make any transformation you are already enlightened. Just let go of all the effort to do any spiritual practices and be still. Don't try to get anywhere just be here as you are. The god is always within you in every moment, all you have to do is let go of control. Surrender to what is now. Every moment.

I am apparently very attractive but even so, I never got laid easily until doing quite a bit of meditation and mind transformation away from neurotic and insecure tendencies. Then I could “come out of my shell” (? seriously though) and just be a good guy who isn’t intimidated by anything and can very comfortably “be myself.” But I would say, “game” is damn intuitive. If you still need to get the pickup phase out of your system, I highly recommend it, from experience, but not exactly to the degree I believe many others have — though it’s not what you probably think... Imagine going from having no game to then practically merely sticking your toe in that world, getting what you want surprisingly fast, and then miraculously finding super early-on that it’s already enough... That is what happened to me. But I’m certain that I’m extremely “lucky” in that regard. And there’s still more to learn. But the natural game-skill or at least game-mindset was somehow uncovered from a fair amount of experience working in a women’s department store (it wasn’t strictly a shoe store, Leo ).

Not an ideal. There’re twofold: transformation and consciousness. One way to summarize the goal: decreasing self increases consciousness. Realizing your self isn’t you. This is what I’m told. What you said isn’t true. You can have fun and be enlightened. Enlightenment is about the truth.

About the last two weeks Incredible things happened in the last two weeks, so I made a list.. The most incredible one was on this Friday: an ex colleague (and hopefully soon a friend of mine) called me to tell me about a formation exactly in what I want to practice when I’ll be doing integrative medicine and also to tell me about a job offer to do an internship in a medical office that has the same philosophy. As cherry on top of the cake the formator and mentor of the medical office knows me by a friend of mine who actually lives in Sardinia!! Universe always delivers big time!! I haven’t said yes to the offer yet as it is for May 2022 and it would mean resigning from the job I have now where I have a one year contract and I also risk to have to pay for the room that I am renting in the new canton but aside from that it’s an amazing opportunity!! During the last session with my therapist, she made a great point about my fear of displeasing other people, which is just the other side of the coin of people pleasing. I am awake enough to know now that people pleasing is manipulation, so I release it. Easier said than done but at least the step of awareness is done. Another thing she said was to learn to channel negative emotions. I do it more and more. The most helpful for me is the D-Love journal, a journal I started in March where I write to myself in an unconditionally loving way. Thank you Universe for giving me this idea!! On Wednesday this week I had a hotseat session with the mentor of the mindset training I’m in. I decided to talk about vulnerability as I noticed that I am still not able to be as authentic as I would like (#backtopeoplepleasing I guess). She said “It’s uncomfortable doing you when you’re not used to it. It’s a birth-giving process.” I just need to lean into the resistance and finding the courage to show myself as I am and speak my truth. There is a nuance though: it’s not about telling all of my thoughts and feelings to the whole world: I need to find what is ok for me to share and be aware of what is appropriate for the situation. She gave me the challenge of finding out how I can be more vulnerable at work. It will be by speaking up when I disagree with or just do not fully understand the why of what my supervisors propose for patient care. Last weekend I participated to an online workshop with the mindset training. It was very intense and focused on Self Love. The main lesson I got from it was the fact that anxiety comes from our mind trying to predict the future based on what happened in the past. Yet the future is made by what I decide to think, feel and do in the present moment. Also, personal growth, inner child and shadow work are all supposed to be life-long processes apparently. Does it mean that I’ll never get rid of anxiety? Idk.. Quoting my mentor, it just means that life will continue to throw challenges to me to foster my growth. So it’s totally possible that one day I’ll stop worrying about things that will probably never happen. Defined like this it’s so ridiculous!! :’) Thank you Universe for all this awareness!! Here are some gold nuggets I got from the workshop: The more you love yourself, the more other people can love you Dancing is the language of the soul My message to my inner child: You can tell things!! I am love, love is not something I give or receive: I can just operate as love. It’s all about balance: our best traits can become negative if pushed at the extreme. The negativity/positivity that we think creates in the world. Suffering comes from resisting reality so get busy only with what you can control: your thoughts, actions and feelings!! Dismantling th Ego is understanding how it defines the future based on the past. Acceptance is the fastest way to transformation. Acting on what you’re intuitively guided towards is challenging, that’s just the way it is. Return to love daily. Focus on what you want to become and what you want to attract. When you’re you all the time you’re less exhausted. Love rules and love heals. Your thoughts are not your thoughts, until you start creating intentionally (with affirmations, visualizations etc). Showing up is the most important thing for a relationship. Be authentic, 100%!! Be willing to be vulnerable, being vulnerable is the true act of courage. Don’t make it about achieving things, make it about being the best human being you can be. You’re always one decision away from becoming a different person. Share the growth, not the process! Keep leaning into the resistance: go where you’re uncomfortable every day! Keep letting go: if you’re meant to be together, you’ll find each other. Be clear and stay clear! New affirmations: To let go of what’s no longer in alignment with the life I want: “I deserve the very best that life has to offer. You are not the best so I release you”. It doesn’t matter what the mind is saying, I just practice. I am love and I only act from love. The next step now is doing more and being more intentional in what I do. I noticed I’m letting myself go in some subtle ways, like meditating in bed instead of seated; not really exercising and eating things I one ate just exceptionally more regularly. A nation is born stoic and dies epicurean (Will Durant). Fortunately I live in the same era as Ryan Holiday. I’ll subscribe again to the Daily Stoic!!

Friday 18/11/2021 22:10 If my anxiety fades a bit, what I'm left with is a bit of an indifference to life or death, I suppose. I'm not in a rush to kill myself, and neither do I desire to. They talk about there being intrinsic fear, which I seem to have internalised in habits, but the habits look unreal to me from this POV as a role which could be broken, I just lack motivation. Silence and book can be my companion, maybe walking tomorrow. I have no need for food today but I could very well eat I'm not sure about the extent of my "transformation". I get a gentle smile from life somehow. I've probably been living with eyes closed for a while, unwilling to leave my hole despite inner realisations A long way to go

Lol no sorry I don't get the three cups reference. I don't believe the thought is perception. I know the word simply refers to something that I perceive. I look around and I perceive what I CALL change. I perceive what I call old people and young people. The word refers to something real that I perceive though. And baby to old person is called change or transformation but certainly not No change.

In my own journey, I've found there is a direct relationship between how much I love myself and how needy I am for the love of others.... I don't think there's a silver bullet - it takes time and work and more time and more work, but real transformation is indeed possible... before I could really start to grow and change, I had to face up to and own the fact that, on a deep level, I hated myself... it sounds severe, I know, but I had to face the truth before I could move forward... I wish you (self) love and healing my friend...

No shit. What I tried to say was that if he only got views I doubt the transformation would be this drastic. I love it..

It's not just about sex. Actually very little. It's more about the significant personal transformation that occurs when a man does a lot of serious cold approach and socialising. A part of that man dies and a newer, stronger more masculine individual is created. It's almost like a right of passage into manhood if taken seriously. The sex is a small by-product of the process. Most guys are just happy to get a bit of attention and validation from a female.

I can speak for myself that if you do an authentic high quality practice like isha yoga and not some youtube cowdung, all these things like depression, anxiety, insomnia will go away. I'm saying this, because I used to be depressed and suicidal 24/7 some years ago. And today I can't even remember when I had a bad day or a bad sleep. Life is easy, your problem is you're looking for solutions in the wrong place, you do some stupid nonsence and then expect results to come. No, unless you do the right things, rights thinga won't happen to you. I recommend people if they're serious about their own wellbeing to find a high quality tools for their transformation instead of listening to false teachers and teachings that are roaming the entire internet space today. Regards ❤?