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At what level would you interpret the saying? I understand the importance of taking the saying as it feels natural to me, however, I still seek your point of view on it. Taking time away to sit in nothingness is powerful but take too little or too much time to do and there would be consequences. So, maybe what I'm asking is, what do you recommend in terms of getting the clarity on what you really want? I think it's still useful to go above experimenting and seeing what I like and don't like, even if I do figure out my core desire/s to avoid becoming stagnant. Even so, it seems that overall you're alluding to a mix of both time in nothingness and time in conscious experimentation no?

This is kind of a new insight I’ve had.

Hello Actualized community, Some of you might remember me from a long time ago when I was just beginning to awaken, and I contributed some of my knowledge and tried my best to help the community with these subjects. I purposely stayed away from this forum and Leo's videos to dig deeper into awakening, god, reality, whatever you want to call it. I'll be speaking with a relative "I" — before anyone frets. I've had 80+ awakenings in the span of a year. I have been spiritually gifted since I was a kid, without even knowing it, but I seem to have a pretty easy time creating the experiences that lead to awakenings. There were periods where I had multiple awakenings in a single week, and the majority were NOT drug induced. I made sure to always write down the revelations that I learned and I am ready to share them with you all. I had experiences where I was literally sucked out of the scene I was in and thrown into an empty void of pure light, love light. I am going to make this short and sweet. This is meant to help you awaken quickly. Before I start though, you're going to have to accept some shocking truths, so before you read this, please open your mind. Trust in what I am telling you here. I have personally verified every single thing I am about to share. I will refer to God as "That which cannot be spoken" — as the word God is a bit silly. 1. You don't have a face. Notice for yourself, that you feel like you are located above your neck, but notice that instead of your face, you have a huge open window. This open window is your view of the world. Instead of your head, you have the world. The world is your mind. But it's not your physical mind, somehow inside a brain. No, no, no..... your mind is absolute and is shared with everything else. Prove it to yourself. Try to locate your head, and point to your face. At no point does it reach you. There's nothing there. Instead, you have colors, sounds, thoughts, feelings, touch, etc. The entire room in which you are right now is a "part" of your head. Your head is the godhead. It is completely empty, is nothingness, yet it exists. 2. Reality is a moving painting. The colors, sounds, smells you are experiencing are NOT the byproduct of your brain. I repeat. They are NOT a product of your brain. There is no light going into your "eyes" (you have no eyes, or face) — there is no brain to turn audiowaves into music. When you hold an apple, you think that you are seeing the redness of the apple in your brain, but notice that you aren't looking at anything. The apple is existing, IN your consciousness. It is BEING inside of your head. You are not seeing it through no mechanism. Reality is RAW and you are compressed into it and through it. When you see the red of the apple (unlike science which says that colors only exist in brains) what you are experiencing is what Gnostics call The Truth. Sounds, colors, smells, feelings, thoughts. – THAT IS OBJECTIVE REALITY. You get it? You aren't hearing or seeing at all, because reality appears 1:1 instantly in the screen of your consciousness, which is that void that we talked about. 3. Close your eyes. Realize that when you close your eyes, that dark field is really you. You are the entire dark field in which reality appears. When you close your eyes you cannot locate yourself. You just see an endless void of darkness with no edges or divisions. This is what you would call your soul. Your head is a projector. The colors you see are not happening in a brain, because the brain would need to have a physical screen upon which the colors are looked at. They have to exist in some way for your visual field to appear. Therefore this is false. No brain. 4. Is Solipsism true? No. Other people ARE in fact conscious as they are other *instances* of yourself in a parallel timeline being imagined by consciousness simultaneously. REMOVE the idea that only your individual ego is having a conscious experience. Drop it. IT'S NOT TRUE. Other people are as conscious as you, but because THEY ARE YOU. Other people are other POVs that "That which cannot be spoken of" is creating and animating through its presence. The entire universe is like a program running in the mind of this unknowable conscious being. Your life is a program, my life is a program. We are divine expressions of that being who is on an eternal quest to understand what it is, and it cannot do it without your point of view, because reality would be finite without your existence. 4. Is this being knowable? No. And please don't refute this with "But awakenings!" — "That which cannot be spoken of" is completely out of reach and is the literal bedrock of existence. It does not have a subjective experience like you and I do. It's asleep forever. Any awakenings you may have, are a connection to its SPIRIT, not its mind, as its mind is busy imagining everything. 5. Is there an objective reality? Yes. Even thought the entire universe is the dream of this being that is asleep, it exists, but not physically. The universe is all mind. But yes, there ARE people doing other things outside of your POV. It is all happening simultaneously, and through relativity. But those people ARE you. Just in other avatars for that lifetime. Other people exist, and your ego is not alone in the universe. You are at all times surrounded by infinite copies of yourself. 6. Ghosts, demons, gnomes, fairies, and all other mythical creatures are real. I have verified this myself through multiple instances where I communicated with extra-real entities. 7. Magic is real. That's right. Magic IS MIND. Magic is reality. Magic is the power that was required to bring this dream into being. ——————— Reality is NOT a simulation, NOT solipsism, NOT eternal suffering, NOT physical, NOT awful, NOT evil. Reality IS a gift, IS a moving painting of pure light, IS magic, IS mystical in origin, and IS eternal. ——————— I cannot express to you the absolute truth because I cannot communicate the experiences I've had, as they are ineffable. But trust me on the following: Solipsism is false There is no infinity of Gods, this is another trap. There is only ONE being who makes infinite copies of itself to embody avatars in its dream. They aren't separate gods. Reality is, again, a moving painting, and the painter is a being that is "asleep" and dreaming the entire universe up. Reality was NOT created. It ALWAYS was. Colors, sounds, feelings, thoughts are objective reality. The apple is really red. Water is really wet. You aren't seeing anything. Objects are existing in you. Your visual field is a window or a negative sculpture. There is no actual "you" anywhere specifically. Rather, you are the entire visual field, and all the content inside of it. Hope that helps.

Yes. Lasting Happiness = Resting in Ones True Nature = Full Impersonal Enlightenment into Infinite Consciosness/Nothingness/Reality (pointers I like), or what Inliytened1 is pointing to below. The alternative is the merry go round of chasing experiences/states for the relief of the suffering the separate self-identity/contraction causes. Francis Lucille videos linked above are along these topics. Water by the River

I don't hate Moksha, I don't even know him. But I´m not going to let being fucked in the ass. Simple as that. Yeap. The issue here is as always, that I don't buy people's words on a forum. First, whatever 'it' you want refer to, you already have to have come a conclusion that that "it" it's Enlightment and it's the best thing. Secondly , by his words, I don't at all get the sense he is talking about Pure Nothingness or pure No Self (if you want to call Enlightment this), but rather a surrender-allow everything/be in the observer, kind of Awakening. If he thinks this is Awakening and The 'Totality' of what he is, he is for a rude awakening (Ironically LOL) And thirdly, I don't believe for a mere second that he abides in "it" for 24/7 of time. If not, there's work to do. GOD WON´T DO THE WORK FOR YOU! Because you are literally God. This is the classic advaita trap people fall for and I got the sense he is selling/advocating for that. As sadhguru put it, a Belief its great for solace. But you want solace or do you want an actual solution?

How Quantum Physics, String Theory and science overall correspond with GOD-CONSCIOUSNESS-NOTHINGNESS-ILLUSIOARY REALITY-ABSOLUTE INFINITY-ONENESS-POTENTIALandACTUAL-INFINITE DIMENSIONS etc

@Moksha As pure Light that we are, we are seeking always the maximum states of being and pleasure in reality. It serves no purpose to gaslight people that are actually doing action towards to discredit them as "addicts, or addiction seeking style". But I know you don't mean in a bad way. It's just a shame you haven't touched what I'm talking about. And also, What I'm talking about It's the most simpler thing ever, pure concentration, intensity, no self, life energies everywhere, no being here, pure intensity, Aliveness, ecstatic empty light, pure explosive nothingness...and all of that while refilling the gas tank. Don't think that being in that State of Being means you are not functional or you body getting damaged. That's why it's so good ??? Yeap. Unfortunately I know I'm kinda of alone around here. I suspect not a single drug in the whole world can replicate what really infinite intensity or an absolute activation of Life Energies are

selfless = nothingness= infinite self

First off, yes. Nothing is just anything And also, if you like, no, nothing is not "just" anything. The word "just" is a manipulative tactic used by the ego/relative mind (similar to the word "but") in order to suggest that ourselves and others should place less value on one concept, in this case consciousness/nothingness relative to another, such as the quantum field. It's understandable that we might use this tactic here. After all, if we were to suppose, or realise, that the words nothingness, consciousness and quantum field were all being used interchangeably for the same relative purpose, we might indeed agree that they are synonymous, at least in practical usage. However I don't often hear people say "While meditating, I experienced a state of the quantum field". I imagine that's because quantum field, which is a theory, is used more intellectually as a concept. A framework. Whereas, the word "consciousness" is more often used to describe our experience, or even, we might say, the essence/basis of experience. Hmm... my words won't do consciousness/nothingness justice here

There is nothing quantum about reality. It's just a story. Reality is pure nothingness

Spiritual Autolysis - Journal Entry #30 - Sun Jun 10 '23 - 12:41 PM I Love Neale Donald walsch' Conversations with God. This is my version of it. Okay back to truth work: Lower self: is God real? Higher self: I don't know. What is God? Lower self: God is real. I can feel him. Higher self: How? Lower self: He is in my bones. I can hear his voice. I can smell him in the flowers. I swim with her when it's late and gloomy. She is with me in the shower, washing my hair. I can see her off in the distance, miles away. I can feel her warmth upon my skin. I can hear his raspy voice inside of my head. I can hear his thunderous booms bursting through the windows throughout the night. I can see her bright yellow flashes of magnificence on a cloudy night. I can see him in my mother's face. Oh the beauty. I love you mama. I can see him in my head, bartering at a tag sale. I can feel the love of him throughout my bones. But... where is he? Where has he gone? God: I am right here. With you. Now. Just feel and look. That is it. Feel and look. What do you see? What do you feel? That is how you can find me. Whenever you have lost me. Know that I cannot be lost. For this would be impossible. Where would I go? What would I do? As far as I know there is only one real place to be and let me tell you it's a pretty cool place to be. You can be whatever you want, you can do and have anything that you desire. Now who wouldn't want to live in a place like this? Ben: But there is all of this suffering. Millions of living things dying every day! Now what is so cool about that? God: Ohhhhh come on! I'm the coolest gal around! Ben: No you're not. You cause suffering. I suffer all of the time. All day long. This life is hard! God: What is it that you suffer about? Ben: I suffer because I CANT reach my goals. I can't fall in love with myself let alone another individual. I mean what is wrong with me? God: Nothing is wrong with you my child. You are not unusual. The reason that you suffer is because you want to love. You want to love sooo soooo bad. You want to love every nook and cranny of this universe, of this existence. But it is difficult. I have made it difficult. Ben: But why? Why have you made life difficult? Ben: But why didn't you turn us into God's ourselves? God: You are God. Ben: Yeah but not really. I can't fly on over to Venus or drive my magic school bus to the next galaxy. I didn't create the universe. God: Oh yes you did.. You just forgot! Ben: What???! And why would I forget a thing such as that? God: How else could I experience myself? If you knew exactly who you were, then you would behave like me. I don't want you to behave like me. Behave like yourself. However it is that you would like to behave. That's what you should do. Whatever it is you want to do for a career. Do that. Find a relationship. Start a family. Or don't! I don't care. Do as you wish, and know that there is no judgement going on in the universe unless you want there to be. You are loved and will always be loved. By us all. Ben: But why? Why do you want to experience yourself? God: I already told you. I got bored. So I started creating things. You can only stare at a void of nothingness for so long. I had to make something. Ben: Is the universe really infinite? God: Of course the universe is infinite. What kind of God would I be if I could not create an infinite universe? With infinite possibilities. Infinite meanings. Infinite deceptions. Infinite desires. Infinite creations. Now that... Is a damn cool place to be. Ben: An infinite universe... Wow... Now this is a lot to take on... God: Why is it so hard to believe? Ben: But I don't want to live in a universe that is infinite. That's too big! And that would make me too insignificant. Too small. To worthless. Too unworthy. I am saddened by this. God: Ohhhhh... You humans and your sentimentality. Is it really so bad that you're existence does not have cosmic importance? I mean if it did have cosmic importance, that would be a hell of a lot of pressure, wouldn't it? Have fun with life. Have fun with it. Don't take it so seriously. And most importantly, don't take me so seriously. Enjoy it while you are here. That is all you need to know.

What @Inliytened1 refers to as potentiality in nothingness, @justfortoday refers to as database. I prefer @Inliytened1 use of words because database can suggest that it is actual in some way but only Now is actual. Just like when you have dreams at night, you only have one dream and your Mind has the capacity to dream every other dream but I wouldn't say that other dreams are "stored" in some part of the brain. It just pure potential of the Mind to dream up something different, so I would not say that others exists. But you will experience their POV. If you will want to as Godhead.

Sup peoples. Not too much content other than an announcement and discussion about Salvia since (Appreciate ya Leo ) As I initially discovered its existence from the meme on Leo's Blog. A strong quality of my personality is that I "pursue the highest/best" and never back down from challenges however (given the nature of my research thus far) am giving some time, 4 to 6 months or so, to deeply prepare as I am also in the midst of bootstrapping a business. "What I've done" (Psychedelics): LSD (3 times): ranging from 300ug to 600ug Shrooms (3 times): 2g to 4.5g These things aren't necessarily "easy to come by" so I have stuck to traditional consciousness work practices because of so. My top values (referencing Leo's Life Purpose Course, EXCELLENT content and value, highly recommend) are: Consciousness/Awareness at #1 with Truth/Reality at #2. I am lead to believe there is an array of suggestions/conventional advice that one may suggest for this such as: "don't do it alone", "start baby small and work your way up", etc. but wondering if anyone has anything "unique" to add to my research bubble as well as direct experiences or stories. The more radical (relative to typical human life) the stories are, the more eager/exciting I am to "verify"; verify defined as experiencing a similar degree of experience rather than exact experience. There appears to be common themes or experiences of: Becoming/BEING an inanimate object, interacting with Jester-like entities, and "reality being TORN apart". The stories that I find among the most interesting are ones relating to time dilation in the context that Salvia allegedly only lasts 2 to 5 minutes but there are some accounts of people experiencing other states of consciousness for years (example: one person was an eternal void of nothingness for ~2/3 years); of course, we may acknowledge consciousness being INFINITE and to not foolishly project materialistic-paradigm "rules" elsewhere but still. TL;DR - I have heard about Salvia and accept the challenge because I enjoy mindfucks and experiencing various states of Consciousness. Do you have any input, stories, or thoughts you'd like to share?

So similar to the process of neti neti where every aspect of your ego gets short circuited until you become "nothingness". Hmm interesting. I hoped someone here maybe has some direct experience with this kind of technique.

Reality is your vibrational indicator that is reflecting your vibrational frequency to you. It is kinda like a very finetuned and detailed cymatic system that changes its form depending your state of perception, or like a holographic and fractal system into which you are eternally falling. Reality, at the ultimate level, is pure vibration that is vibrating at infinite speed, and that's the level of pure nothingness that comes even before laws of logic, let alone laws of mathematics and physics. From that level, this infinitely fast vibration slows down in its frequency gradually, and evolves into individual realities, of which ours is one. And on that level, the absolute infinite that is nothingness and intelligence guides its manifested versions, that is us, through vibrational awareness. Then we, in the form in which we are, in the spacetime and duality modus in which we are, translate that guidance in the form of emotion and feeling. And then infinite intelligence becomes the path of least resistance through which it calls us. The thing about the path of least resistance is that it is tailormade for each individual being depending on where they are in their momentum of energy and understanding. And that's why infinite intelligence calls each being to their natural vibration, to the degree that it is relevant for them, in a way that they can hear and make sense of. So, if one, for example, is dealing with some disease or some financial problem, or whatever it is, and it is heavy on them, then telling them to just think positive thoughts about their problems would probably not help them. But they can be guided to thoughts that give them some slight relief from where they are. Consciousness, or levels of consciousness, in that sense, might be thought of as a ladder on which you are raising gradually. Or like a river to which you can surrender yourself more and more gradually. And quieting the mind, or inner and honest introspection are some of the ways through which one can, again gradually, achieve those states, and that probably is why you see some forms of these "techniques" in every spiritual teaching and philosophy. When we try to think positive thoughts, we might fail at that, and it might be a fake positivity, if we are not grounded mentally, vibrationally and spiritually first. And when we try to solutions to our problems and answers to our questions, we mostly are not good at it at all. However, if we allow ourselves to relax gradually by simply being, then we begin to have more access to the vibrational frequency of our inner mind, and from there we can receive clearer information. That, in my opinion, what the idea of wu wei actually is in taoism. You might then begin to be able to think more positive thoughts and imagine positive outcomes etc in an honest and vibrationally accurate way. But when you try to do it by forcing yourself into being positive, then it mostly backfires, because there is still some resistance in your vibration.

Hi Ima Freeman, maybe you find that helpful: Awareness OF something stops. But not the potential for Awareness/sentience, or "Pure" Awareness, or however you want to call it. That can't go "anywhere" or stop. "It" is always right here. "IT" doesn't have a name here, it is beyond duality, nothing can describe it. It is the Absolute, or True You. You can call it of Awareness, but not Awareness OF, since there is no of then. It is void, empty, silent, infinite, and can only be described in negative terms. Yet, It manifests the potential of all possible worlds. quote from the link: You (capital Y) are the whole Infinite Reality (imagined body, imagined appearances, imagined everything n+1). With nothing outside of it, because that would be an imagined arising too. Any boundary separiting IT from an imagined other IT would be an imagined arising, an appearing phenomenon. Infinite. Try to imagine everything gone, including thinking: NOTHINGNESS. Not big, not small, just NOTHINGNESS. A vast infinite Nothingness, that is not even vast, because there is no 3D-space or anything (no objects/arisings). Similiar to Deep Sleep. YOU are still there. YOU awake every morning after having been there. You already know that you can be totally something/somebody else in dreams, and have totally forgotten all the past you imagine right now to be your "real" human self. But IT is not Nothingness like nothing there at all, but Nothingness with the POTENTIAL for sentience as soon as anything is imagined, and with Infinite Potential to imagine ANYTHING within it, n+1. Imagine a water pistol pops up in this Nothingness (see example Massaro, Conversations with a Skepctic): Then you have a) an imagined appearance (water pistol) and b) "something" perceiving it, the subject. Or just the perceptions of the water pistal in case no separates self is imagined/arises. Just the waterpistol perceiving itself, perceptions perceiving themselves. Impersonal. Then you have a "world", and subject/object. So what are you then? a) The Infinite Field with anything that can possibly be imagined? Yes. Nondual/Totality/Oneness. The manifest/imagined side of Infinite Consciousness. Always changing, never stable, since no appearance/form lasts. NONE. But there is a constant: b) But even more so, you are that Nothingness that can be unaware of itself, Infinite Consciousness initially unaware of itself, but with the potential for sentience if something arises. The unmanifest side of Infinite Consciousness. The unchanging, Unborn and constant core of the True You/Reality itself. So empty that IT is the Abyss, Impersonal. NOTHINGNESS. But also Infinite Potential, since IT can imagine anything. and "Both"a) and b) is indivisible, nondual. Totally the same essence, ONE Reality. The Nothingness or the True You is already the essence/"substance" of every imagined arisings/phenomenon, including the water pistol, or all separate self arisings (they are all appearances within you). a nice book about that is Szyper, "Infinite Consciousness" Any name for it brings some problems with it, because Reality contains all pointers/words, and a word/concept only has meaning in terms of its opposite. But nice pointers are Absolute/Pure Awareness, or even better (in my opinion) Nothingness. Because IT is not the everyday Awareness with subject/object (Awareness "OF) duality. Of course, it is the same Pure Awareness throughout, but when containing the illusion arisings of a separate-self, Its true Nature is covered by clouds and can not be realized. And it can not be realized by thinking about it, only by waking up. But nice pointers give the space to practice, and practice makes ripe for the grace of crossing over or realizing IT, passing the Gateless Gate. Selling Water by the River

I lately wrote the topic " I woke to the GOD. Death is the only whey to forget?' (sorry for my English, i'm not a native speaker) Thank you so much for all your help there, and also i want to send all the love to : @Kksd74628 @Godishere @Tim R They helped me on priv, so much!! i don't know what would i do, without them. Background: i've had spiritual experience for over 2-3 years, 16-17 trips, (lsd,shrooms,dmt). I mediate every day, lately for 2h a day. Also, I've had some retreats, on which it was 7-8h meditation daily. Almost every tip, till last, was pretty easy, some were challenging, but overall it was rather calm. I've experienced pure nothingness, no-dual states, i've seen my reflection in face on my girlfriend, i had God experience on DMT, when everything and everyone dispreaded, there was no time, only infinity etc. It was all ok. Dosage: 3 days ago, i took 250 uq LSD. I had one trip on 400uq, and it was nothing like that. Trip: After 1h i went to the God state. To the point, I exactly saw God everywhere. The floor was made of God, air was pure God, walls were God, which obviously is all me. I knew that, there was no going back, cause even if i go to the hospital, i can't meet anyone other than God, which is me. If I take some pills, it's going to be only self-deception to forget. I was deceiving my-self all the time, that i'm not God, it was obvious to me. it was all fine, i knew it was the case. But then i went to the bedroom, to talk with my girlfriend, she took LSD too. She was in GOD-state as well. She told me, that "I'm God" i don't why, but i felt like God, which is me, perfectly designed every aspect of my life, from birth, to this moment, and now, it's speaking to me, by the mouth of my girlfriend. I sat down on the bed, to look outside the window.... and all the people in the next building were gone. All the lights in their flats went down. I said "what? Am i really GOD?" there's no-one else? , she said, "yes". Then all the buildings collapsed into me. Weather started to change pretty rapid. Time stopped. Out of my pure imagination. I was 100% sure, that my-small-self died, and i'm out of the dream and i can't go back. There was only face of my girlfriend left. So i said, " really? i was God all my life? i'm dead now?" And then something happened, which shocked me to the core. That was the moment i felt like i want to go back, and forget. That was the moment i regret that i was even alive. The horror: i looked at my girlfriend eyes. It was all sparky with life as always, but suddenly it was gone. I was looking to the dead eyes, completely without a life. The woman i love, was not only dead, but she was empty and shallow. Dark. Void. She was like a withered flower. Like empty costume. It was the most horrifying things i saw in all my life. I was all alone, staring into the empty void of my girlfriend's eyes. Every fucking horror is a joke compare to that. With tears i asked " are you there?" and then i saw like life is going back to her. Her eyes went sparky again. But at that point, all the solipsism horror was unbearable. I wanted to kill myself. I wanted only cease to exist. I don't want to live with knowledge like that. I don't want to be alive with costume-people. It was pure-fuckig-madness-hell. My post on forum: At this moment I tried to write a post here, on the forum. But i knew, i couldn't get any advice from no one, because even actualize.com and Leo Gura is pure fucking imagination, only to cheat me into thinking, that there are others. I'm here, alone, trapped in this empty-shallow-world, to the infinity. It's Only me. I can't die, i can't escape. I wrote every music there is, i wrote every book, it was always only me!! fuck! i wanted to know infinity, and it turned out to be fucking back-mirror-hell. I wrote this post anyway, but i knew, i was talking only to my-self, and my infinite imagination. After the trip: Next 48h i couldn't sleep. I was crying, and shacking on the floor. I couldn't eat. I wanted only to die, and forget. Right now: People on this forum helped me with going through this. Today, after 6-7h of sleep, i'm back to the "old-self" and i don't see imagination and God everywhere. Thank God! Any idea what went wrong, and how do i integrate this? You guys said God-realization it's all about love, and i got fucking horror X1000 to the infinity. Thank you, for all your support. Personally, i think my "ego" still corrupts this forum solipsism, and i feel it through an illusion of separated self. But i don't know.

First, I empathize with your struggles. Life is tough. It feels impossible sometimes. It's overwhelming and can totally go the opposite direction you want it to. It can feel out of your control and to a large extent it is. I don't want to make assumptions or project, but you've clearly been feeling down and out and I want to acknowledge that before I give you my two cents. I've hit low points too and have turned to spiritual techniques and psychedelics as a desperate attempt to figure it all out. I haven't done a trip like the one you did though. I stick with LSD and I've never gone higher than 150ug. I'm fairly sensitive and I only use it for trauma work or with set intensions. I suggest if you want to get something practical out of your experiences with psychedelics, lower your dose and have a good foundation of spiritual practice before. Don't blast youself to space if you can't handle life on earth. These psychedelics show you your highest potential. This can be depressing if you are nowhere near there. Use them to show you what the next highest state looks and feels like and then try to maintain that. My base reality has moved up to a microdose of LSD because I realized that it's possible to live there sober. If I were to experience what you experienced, I'd feel so far from that, that I might get depressed and discouraged. That is not productive. I'd say take time away from psychedelics for a year or two. When you return, take low doses and don't mix substances too much. These types of intense spiritual experiences are meant to help you realize that this state is always available and always present. When I take LSD, what I realize is that the only reason I'm not tripping when sober is because I haven't given myself permission to do so. This is the classic idea that you are always enlightened, but you just haven't realized it yet. You experienced a potencial way of existing and it was pretty great compared to the lower vibrational plane of material reality. You caught a glimpse of the truth but your ego hijacked it on the come down. I'd say let this experience process and try your best to integrate it, there are deep lessons there, they may not be "practical" but they may be lessons in being. Yes, life is meaningless... that's not inherently depressing. The depression is a projection of the ego. The ego wants to feel important and special. When it realizes that it isn't, and that it might not even exist, it gets depressed and holds on to that because that is all it has left. Practice reframing this experience of nothingness. Depression is a choice, choose to view this meaninglessness as infinite potential for meaning(it's the same thing). Because life is meaningless, you can create that meaning. Ask yourself: Why is meaninglessness depressing? Best luck and keep the faith

@Demeter The void puzzled me a lot and still does. How I got to thinking about it was one night when I sat and listened to trance music focusing on the silence between each kick. I have intuited the existence of the void by realizing where all experience comes form and where it ends. Before your birth - void After death - void And so with every experience in between the two. It materializes out of the void and goes back to it. But since itself the void is not an experience I cant say that I have direct knowledge of it only conceptual and through comparing it to my "nothingness" awakening. Yet I am certain that the void which comes after death is followed by another arising (whatever form it might take) since the possibility for such arising was already established through the very fact of your life emerging from the void that came before it. And even if you spend millions of years in that void before another experience comes, for you it will feel like a fluid continuation from the moment you died. From what I came to see the void as even god dose not persist in it. That is what baffles me. Have a great day! Daniel.

How do you connect with loved ones who passed away? I want a practical answer here, at my human level of understanding. Don't give me a one sentence answer like death is an illusion or I'm imagining it. Being that those may be true, those one sentence answers are hard to articulate from my point of progress. Give me a human being answer. Here's what I want to know: Where the fuck are they? Where did they go? Can they see everything I'm doing? Do they know what I'm thinking? What are physical/spiritual symptoms that they are around/watching me right now? How do I communicate with them? After a year of being dead, are they just hanging out in nothingness being able to do anything they want?

I have experienced fainting and having a blackout on to much space cake. And i sleep every day To me it seems as if i am never unconscious, my consciousness just skips forward. If there is an infinite void at the end of life, then where would it come from and how would you be conscious of it? Does unconscious really exist? I once went wild camping in a hammock in a pitch dark forest. In absolute middle of the night i woke up, and there was no sound, no light and because i was hanging it sorta felt like floating. Its the closest iv been to absolute nothingness and it was a really strange sensation. But blank sensory input still seems to have static.

there are many barriers to break with 5meo. It is typical that of pure white light and no memories, experiences of love, and more, but the total openness is that there is nothing left of you and the clarity is total. It is the eternal infinity and you are it. the feeling is: obvious, how could I forget this? If that's what I've always been. not articulated in words but you realize that you forgot and now everything is clear. Yo are the totality, without limit. you get up and dance, laugh and understand what this moment is, how you are creating this experience, how layers and layers of energetic patterns are superimposed, everything is totally clear. the infinity being. Dancing with itself in a sacred dance of love. you peceive yourself flowing from the depth of nothingness, creating intricate shapes of beauty, is completely sacred. Over all, the quality of what you are: everything. Glory. you cry. you've seen.

Very nice description, and interesting similiarity. That is exactly the essence of the method (Mahamudra stage 1. Skill of Reckognition) once really implemented (after a long time of practice to get really able to do that) that got things really going for me with awakened states. "What happens if you investigate into emerging thoughts this way, is that they get FASTER. VERY FAST. Like 20-30 emergent thoughts/feeling arisings per second, most of them rudimentary. The mind does this to keep the illusion going. To make it too fast for you. But at some point, one learns to get that fast also..." Basically, looking into a thought, one sees its Emptiness/Nothingness (one doesn't find the thought, it evaporates). It is cut off. Dzogchen calls this cutting off "Trekchö". Daniel Brown called this stage a "High Speed Search Task into the unfindability of the nature of thoughts". A High Speed Search task into their emptiness, into their nature as consciousness, as Nothingness. So the emerging gets fast, very fast. Daniel Ingram also mentions that. But at some point, with enough practice and familiarity, YOU get faster. You spot and cut off every very fast, subtle, fragmentary thought arising. None of them "grips" you anymore, since you have seen them all, and their structure. Just thoughts arising very fast ...., see link below Selling Water by the River

The deciding step for really getting the nondual awakened states flowing what is described below. Before that point in practice, no Nonduality, the visual field rock solid "material" and out there "external". No awakened state. To get there took quite some years. Could have been faster with good coaching, but didn't have that. Imagine it like this: Many years of meditation the mindful-way. Zero awakened state from that, not to even think about Nonduality at all. Didn't even know what that really is, despite reading about it. And then the bliss of these states, and nonduality opened up.... But that was also a process over several years. Cutting off the mindstream like this, or at least letting it fully transparent flow in oneself (that is not the usual mindfulness, its thought train appears like an object-flow in you), changes the energetic states of the whole system. It is an indirect path (but it can't be different): You influence the thought via ATTENTION (this is something you can guide/focus/control). You can't directly influence the Awakened State, how could you. You look into the thoughts, like described below. They dissolve then, their nature IS emptiness/consciousness. That done long enough brings the energetic shift to the awakened states. At least for me. And for thousands of others, see the Mahamudra-and Dzogchen practicelineages. Since more than one Millenia. And of course you can do that also! Every being can. The essence of each thought IS Consciousness/Emptiness. The separate-self IS these thoughts, and corresponding feelings. One can dissolve them all. And that clears the way. Reality it litereally desinged in such a way that: Separate Self = Clouding over= thought stream when that is not cut/Trekchö, the clouding mechanism starts: Reality is "out" there/external/duality, "solid/material, and limited (visual field bubble has an imagined border) not infinite. Switch off the separate self thought/feeling flow, the illusion-system ("out" there/external, "solid/material, and limited) gets switched off). That design of Reality makes complete sense: Samsara NEEDS this illusion (external/duality, solid, not infinite) The illusion can be dissolved by aligning to Reality (EMPTY IMPERSONAL JUST AWARENESS, NOT separate self-illusion).when that is practiced to make the mindstream conform to Reality, the illusion arisings (external/duality, solid, not infinite) fall away. Yoga of One Taste And in that nondual impersonal state of Infinite nondual mere appearance/lucid/not solid Infinite Consciousness, one can dissolve the final subtle illusion: Subtle Separateness of a Transparent witness, still coloured by Individuality and Separateness. Yoga of Nonmeditation. I can only highly recommend you to read the book, start the practice (similiar as described below) over a longer time period, and see what happens. Psychedelics only lift the veil mainly concerning this here (external/duality, solid, not infinite). But they don't dissolve the Illusion mechanism, the clouding over. Let's describe it in Engineering-language: The separate self is a positive feedback-loop: Uncut/Untranscended thought-stream including separate self I-thoughts/I-feelings triggers a system that cause these illusion arisings for the visual field: illusion arisings (external/duality, solid, not infinite). And also regular dissatisfaction/suffering, which make the ego work on its next salvation-project to bring experiences that bring bliss and relieve. The endless circle of suffering, N+1. and an enormously stable clouding-over illusion system of the separate self. Works in Billions of people, normally nobody wakes up just by chance. Some do, then its normally Karma or something the like. But extremely few. Cut that system, at some point the cutting/Treckchö becomes self sustaining: positive feedback loop. Because its lovely, brings bliss. And before that tilting point, it takes energy, because its unpleasant. A negative feedback-loop while meditating. Mayas Illusion-protection-mechanism. Must be there, else everybody would be meditating. Then, via keeping the mindstream cut/Trekchö/Transcended, another positive feedback loop sets in: The Endohuasca-system gets triggered. This then makes the visual field mere appearance/lucid/not solid/infinite, and especially duality/externality goes. Brown calles it Boundless Timeless Awake Awareness/Consciousness. And resting in that brings even way more bliss, which allows dissolving core elements/Traumas of the separate self, and staying lucid in daily life also with problems. In these states, the last remnants of the separation-illusion are dissolved... Try to think in "positive-feedback-loops", and tilting points/mountain-passes to reach, having climed in goes downhill or automatic/nice/blissful. and initial uphill-climbs to get to the first downhill-track after crossing the mountain pass height Willpower/Suffering while meditating until a certain point, then blissfull/downhill/automatic. Then, ego/Trauma/pain throws curve ball, and the current meditation/bliss fails. Further practice. Momentum building. Gradually dissolving of the separate self contraction and suffering, bliss gets stronger. Increasingly, more and more difficult life situation can be handled lucid. And the magic point is, after some years: Sitting somewhere on a park bench, the bliss flowing, and: realizing the freedom & fullness of not needing anything. Water by the River From this Link: For me, the crucial Point for really getting the meditation "really" off the pillow into daily life was getting to THAT here Skill of Recognition: (1. Yoga of Mahamudra system) Now it gets interesting. That was the decisivepoint for me once I understood that, and implemented it. Afterwards, it started to get nondual pretty soon... If you look HOW the thoughts emerge, (1) out of what they emerge, (2) what they are, (3) in what they move (4) into what they disappear ALL of that (1)(2)(3)(4) must be present. Thoughts DO appear. From "something". Stay in "something". Consisting of "something" All of that is Emptiness, or Consciousness, or Nothingness. Thoughts are made of "that","move in that", "dissolve into that". and you will never SEE that, or can say what it is. Nothing. But not a blank nothing. An aware Nothing. Actually the essence of all world-appearances, but that comes later, when it gets nondual, at the Yoga of One Taste. What happens if you investigate into emerging thoughts this way, is that they get FASTER. VERY FAST. Like 20-30 emergent thoughts/feeling arisings per second, most of them rudimentary. The mind does this to keep the illusion going. To make it too fast for you. But at some point, you learned to get that fast also... Basically, looking into a thought, one sees its Emptiness/Nothingness (one doesn't find the thought, it evaporates). It is cut off. Dzogchen calls this cutting off "Trekchö". Daniel Brown called this stage a "High Speed Search Task into the unfindability of the nature of thoughts". A High Speed Search task into their emptiness, into their nature as consciousness, as Nothingness. So the emerging gets fast, very fast. Daniel Ingram also mentions that. But at some point, with enough practice and familiarity, YOU get faster. You spot and cut off every very fast, subtle, fragmentary thought arising. None of them "grips" you anymore, since you have seen them all, and their structure. Just thoughts arising very fast. You don't control which thoughts arise. Depended origination, they are just emerging by themselves. You can focus on just their arising (of thoughts), just their staying, just their going away. At some point, they just emerge, looking into their nature is automatic, and they immediately dissolve. No duration. Just emergence, and poof gone. And when you are fast enough, you get a continuance of staying mindful. When that happens its pretty clear what happened. Your attention got so fast that you can stay mindful even through the high-speed thought emergence. At the end, they come very fast, they don't get "elaborated out". Thinking, or elaborating the thoughts out, is slower than their emergence. They emerge already fully complete with their content, and then slowly get "talked/elaborated" in your mind. Natural reaction: So WHO the f*** am I (pardon my french) when I don't control what thoughts emerge and if they appear fully with their content in a fraction of a second, and get elaborated later in a hypnotic show over several second? good question... to be answered later. Outcome is: You know the nature of every possible thought (Consciousness-Emptiness-Nothingness), of the whole mental-continuum of thoughts, all that there can be. Their nature. you can cut off or transcend/just watch your normal mindstream in most daily situations without getting caught up/hypnotized by it, which already here leads to a lot of bliss. Not sufficient bliss to get ones separate self completely handled, but already quite wonderful. That is the start of real freedom. You know how your mindstream hypnotizes you, and gets faster when you actually look into each thought arising and its nature. At some point you get fast enough to cut off every arising, or let it elaborate in a controlled aka mindful way. @UnbornTao Oh please hit me. Instead of watching some nice travel-documentation as planned on TV yours truly did again the overkill...

Awareness is only aware OF itself within its dualistic dream, which is existence. It's a subtle but significant point: the absolute is inherently and essentially awareness, beyond existence. To realize awareness requires the illusion of boundaries, but beyond boundaries, awareness is without requiring the appearances of forgetting and realization. Yes. "It" never (could) loose its eternal nature of Awareness. As the only Infinite Aware Reality without a second. If one fully understands what you just wrote... that alone is enough. Beautifully written. And that Awareness can be unaware of itself prooves its fully Empty Impersonal Nature. That is the point I want to bring across, above all else. Neti Neti to the final end, where concepts have long stopped working. Never stop early while the separate-self-gestalt-arisings are not fully transcended. And having walked the path of Neti Neti to its end: Infinite and Everything/Nondual. The pointer (fully empty impersonal nature, or Neti Neti) is the ticket for the way back home, And "can be unaware of itself" prooves this pointer. If IT would be anything other than empty/no thing/infinite, IT could look over its shoulder to see itself. IT can't. When IT does (or better tries), looking deeply into oneself in meditation, it/one has an experience of Emptiness/Nothingness. quod erat demonstrandum Water by the River