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About michaelcycle00

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  1. Not worth it. Just go out and about and see how many people are smiling or seem genuinely happy? Probably not even 1% of them. Notice how a psychopath is much more likely to have a breeze going through life as opposed to a very innocent, good and selfless person. Those 2 factors alone are very simple and straightforward (not to mention factual), I could go way deeper into why life is ultimately not worth it.
  2. But we can't even grasp what Eternal Beingness is really like. Ask yourself, what kind of imagination is existence conjuring during a human's deep sleep? Then, who's to say it couldn't put itself to "sleep" in a similar fashion? I mean, real or imagined, for practical purposes it's basically non-existence.
  3. Christ Almighty... Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing.
  4. If you've been hearing the same story from me perhaps it's because I've been living the same story? Maybe? Not because you invented me or whatever bs. And I'm indeed working on changing it, the little I'm able to, but that doesn't change the fact that my life is currently still hell. I can't speak for the future, just for the now. I am very likely to have experienced a much wider range of emotions than you or the people you've known given my condition, but that doesn't change the fact that I tend to have far more negative experiences than I do positive ones, and that's not just my mind playing games or whatever dumb conclusion you came to. Sadly I can't just stop interpreting objectively bad experiences as good ones in the midst of chaos. If I'm whipping you with a belt with all my strength every single day, you're not just gonna learn to love it. Or maybe you will, women can be interesting like that. I'm not one, however. You don't know what it's like to have lived in fear your entire life. You're so privileged you can't even fathom someone who can't help but be constantly negative. Meanwhile being so hypocritical that MY negativity is not permissible because then your "positivity" is threatened, as evidenced in the above rant. Of course I have moments where I feel good, but they're short-lived, few and far between. I'm very weak, vulnerable and fearful, I cannot understand what it's like to be normal, think normal, feel normal... because I've never experienced it. Every single day for years I've been trying to brainwash myself into being the opposite, and it's been a little helpful, but it shouldn't have to feel like I'm splitting the ocean in half out of pure willpower just to be able to hold a conversation, go to the grocery store, eat when other people are around, hear a variety of sounds without feeling like I could pass out, etc. And that too being just as hard every single time, no improvement after years of doing it on a daily basis. And the reality is, if you were born without legs, no matter how positive, you will never walk. Your question makes no sense. God didn't make everything else perfect but condemn us humans. I'd like for you to experience being a hyena when it's being eaten by a lion. You act as if it makes a difference in reality's perfection that I can verbalize my emotions and a cockroach can't. What a dumb concoction.
  5. Go to therapy I guess, didn’t help me but it may help you.
  6. The only sensical comment in this entire topic. I understand that for those of you who have had more or less an equal amount of positivity and negativity in your lives may come to this conclusion... or extrapolate it to an "objective" existential thing, but reality is absolutely horrible and miserable for most people. That may be perfection, but it's largely irrelevant to the present experience of most beings wishing their nightmare would end. Perfect or imperfect, makes no difference. It's just speech.
  7. Why are you assuming it cancels out? Why is there no particular now rather than there being a particular now?
  8. I mean yes no sh*t it is evolving, what I'm saying is there's no ultimate relevancy to that. In the infinite scheme of things it is as much of a game as a bunch of kids playing with paper planes. Yes, of course it seems bad to me. Who the hell is living life? Some infinite nothingness entity or a limited egoic human? My narcissistic parents are nothing compared to how atrocious this world is, what a bad example and I'm guessing it was a cheap blow on your end. Anyhow, what move is there to make? What mission? Life is too meaningless for a mission. It's just a constant fight day in and day out, I guess those of you from first world countries with loving families just can't really fathom how it's like for others.
  9. Obviously it doesn’t mind, the question here is why this in particular, all things considered. Not just the suffering part. It goes way beyond that. Because it’s immediately obvious with just a bit of contemplation. You’re telling me whatever created this… pretty much infinitely complex creation couldn’t have created something different? It’s literally creating different things through your awareness all the time. Are we not stuck in the same exact frame forever? We’re clearly not. You’ve literally said it’s infinite and unlimited multiple times and then you go and put limits on it in the next sentence.
  10. Brother, what? When did I decide to separate from God? I was born into my circumstances. I am. Problem with relativity is nothing is entirely true or entirely false so you can make a positive and negative case for any and everything. Still, we can mostly all agree things like murder and torture is wrong. Cool story but there's no true evolution or movement within eternity. All already is, so if we're in this pile of shit right now it's not because God is evolving, it's quite simply because that's what God is manifesting itself as. This very next second reality could jump forward into the equivalent of a billion trillion years of evolution and save us from this moronic existence, but it doesn't. Precisely, all these bad choices from people are ultimately a manifestation of the absolute. But even the people in here have the idea that maybe if other people had taken better choices we'd be in a much better place and put the whole blame on them, without acknowledging that those choices are a manifestation of the absolute. If those people could've taken different choices, all things accounted for, they would've. But they couldn't, and they didn't, with no true control of their own. And now we're here.
  11. Right, but why not a worthwhile challenge? This life is like “I challenge you to go up a million stairs without stopping and then you get nothing at all”. What a deal…
  12. Seriously, put that “ego just doesn’t know what’s best” thing aside for a moment. Why would an omnipotent, infinitely knowing, omniscient and whatnot being create *this*? If the ego doesn’t know what’s best that’s God’s choosing too, and it’s stupid because he lives through the egos not through his God-nothingness-self. Seriously, the plot isn’t even good, which for the majority of people goes a little like: be born, have a few good experiences in childhood that you’ll cherish during adulthood, become a teenager and be attracted to the opposite sex, reach adulthood, be very wary of the outside world since you’ve learned it’s dangerous and sit in front of a computer most of your day most days doing something that doesn’t really benefit the world or that you like just so that you can manage to exist and spend the rest of your time doing chores around the house, being emotionally available to your partner despite being tired af and pandering to mini you who’s most likely destined to the same future you had/have. Retire when you’re old, too tired and frail to do anything worthwhile, and finally die. And please don’t come at me with the usual wank “everyone is in control of their destiny” because as we have all come to agree, time doesn’t exist. Reality is NOW, God’s will is the present moment, so all those decisions that you wouldn’t condone in my example for most people are decisions that God manifested. I mean think about it, thought comes before action, and the ego isn’t prior to thought. Boom, no free will. Even science agrees with this. Ask yourself how many people you see smiling when you’re walking outside? Usually most seem miserable and defensive. You could also say “everything manifests in infinity” but we have no real motives to think that’s the case. As shitty as this world is, there’s intelligence in its design. Are there actual modes of existence where things weigh more towards positivity, or will it always take the self moving mountains to get but a crumb of love?
  13. Not to be taken offensively but your trip reports usually leave me with a bad taste in my mouth. I'm guessing it's just a matter of these insights being more aligned with your specific life rather than something that applies to all. I'd be beyond miserable if I had to hold myself to such high standards. I just wanna breathe, walk, cycle, eat delicious food, cook, sleep... I may sound like an old man but I'm in my early twenties and I honestly have no worldly motivations. My only motivation is to be able to afford to be comfortable at home and not spend 10 hours a day 6 days a week working this soul-sucking corporate job and having to deal with everyday people's usual negativity.
  14. But aren't I the creator of this video game? So surely I can decide to end it or skip ahead without having to repeat it. But even if I couldn't, what levels are there to complete in actual eternity? Technically I would have already played this one an infinite amount of times and all the potential new ones. No matter which way you put it, if you dig deep enough suicide is absolutely fine and even preferable in a lot of cases.
  15. Lmaooo I’m loving these replies Too real…