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Nonduality is the philosophical, spiritual, and scientific understanding of non-separation and fundamental intrinsic oneness. For thousands of years, through deep inner inquiry, philosophers and sages have come to the realization that there is only one substance and we are therefore all part of it. This substance can be called Awareness, Consciousness, Spirit, Advaita, Brahman, Tao, Nirvana or even God. It is constant, ever present, unchangeable and is the essence of all existence. In the last century Western scientists are arriving at the same conclusion: The universe does indeed comprise of a single substance, presumably created during the Big Bang, and all sense of being – consciousness – subsequently arises from it. This realization has ontological implications for humanity: fundamentally we are individual expressions of a single entity, inextricably connected to one another, we are all drops of the same ocean. Science and Nonduality is a journey, an exploration of the nature of awareness, the essence of life from which all arises and subsides. What is nonduality, anyway? There are many shades of meaning to the word nonduality. As an introduction, we might say that nonduality is the philosophical, spiritual, and scientific understanding of non-separation and fundamental oneness. Our starting point is the statement “we are all one,” and this is meant not in some abstract sense, but at the deepest level of existence. Duality, or separation between the observer and the observed, is an illusion that the Eastern mystics have long recognized, and Western science has more recently come to understand through quantum mechanics. Dualities are usually seen in terms of opposites: Mind/Matter, Self/Other, Conscious/Unconscious, Illusion/Reality, Quantum/Classical, Wave/Particle, Spiritual/Material, Beginning/End, Male/Female, Living/Dead and Good/Evil. Nonduality is the understanding that identification with common dualisms avoids recognition of a deeper reality. So how can we better understand nonduality? There are two aspects to this question, and at first glance they appear to be mutually exclusive, although they may be considered two representations of a single underlying reality. The first aspect is our understanding of external reality, and for this we turn to science. The word science comes from the Latin scientia, which means knowledge. The beauty and usefulness of science is that it seeks to measure and describe reality without personal, religious, or cultural bias. For something to be considered scientifically proven, it has to pass exhaustive scrutiny, and even then is always subject to future revision. Inevitably human biases creep in, but the pursuit of science itself is intrinsically an evolving quest for truth. But then quantum mechanics turned much of this lauded objectivity on its head, as the role of the observer became inseparable from the observed quantum effect. It is as if consciousness itself plays a role in creating reality. Indeed, the two may be the same thing. As quantum pioneer Niels Bohr once put it: “A physicist is just an atom’s way of looking at itself!” The second aspect is our inner, personal experience of consciousness, our “awareness of awareness.” We have our senses to perceive the world, but “behind” all perception, memory, identification and thought is simply pure awareness itself. Eastern mystics have described this undifferentiated consciousness for thousands of years as being the ultimate state of bliss, or nirvana. Seekers have attempted to experience it for themselves through countless rituals and practices, although the state itself can be quite simply described. As Indian advaita teacher Nisargadatta Maharaj said: “The trinity: mind, self and spirit, when looked into, becomes unity.” The central challenge to understanding nonduality may be that it exists beyond language, because once it has been named, by definition — and paradoxically — a duality has been created. Even the statement “all things are one” creates a distinction between “one” and “not-one”! Hardly any wonder that nonduality has been misunderstood, particularly in the West. Excerpt above from: https://www.scienceandnonduality.com/about/nonduality/ Other resources, explanations, & pointers to nonduality: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-O_KhOnJ62o http://www.lifewithoutacentre.com/writings/what-is-nonduality/ , https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nondualism https://endless-satsang.com/advaita-nonduality-oneness.htm Meditation Preparations & Considerations of The Temple (The Body) Make changes in accordance with listening to the body via feeling. Let go of assumptions about what you know, what you can & can’t do, and who you are & are not. Be mindful of the distinction between what you directly experience, and your thought about something. Be mindful the term direct experience does not refer to a past, a now, a present, a future, or a self (these are thoughts). Be conscious of breathing, and breathe from the stomach. Notice the increase in awareness of feeling in the body when you do so. Maintain toxin free care & hygiene, such as with: preservatives, fluoride, aluminum, mercury, & neurotoxin free products and water. Get a routine physical & full comprehensive blood report, and review it with your doctor (preferably a Holistic Dr). Eat clean. Food is mood, mood is clarity. Listen to your body & educate yourself about food; calories, nutrients, vitamins, supplements, etc. Your second best friend in this whole world, should be your stomach. Try several approaches to eating. Realize you only know about food from direct experience and let assumptions go. Listen to the body, put habit & preference of taste secondary to energy and clarity. Put direct experience, of how you feel, first. Exercise to the extent you are able, as early in the day as you are able. Don’t eat after 8pm, drink water instead. Be mindful of honesty, humility, & compassion. Pause to allow the presence of love when creating responses, vs mindlessly reacting. Get 8 hrs of sleep. Meditate early in the morning, before eating, and before any thought engaging activities like; - All screens, reading anything, listening to any thing or anyone, talking to anyone, etc. Instead, step outside and express gratitude. - Thinking. Develop letting thinking go from waking up until after meditation. Every thought that arises, let it go by being aware of breathing & feeling. Use ”not till after meditation” as needed. Love yourself enough to do this, your quality of life will be greatly enhanced by your commitment and followthrough with daily meditation. This is putting your inner well being first - and then going about your day. It is a total game changer. Get up as early as needed to make this possible for yourself. You’ll only fall asleep earlier as a result, and get a better night’s sleep. Maintain a dream journal. Every morning when you wake up, write any recollections of dreams in the journal. If there were none, write “no dreams last night” in the journal. Doing this daily develops connection and communication. After writing a dream down, let it go completely. Revisit it after meditation. Consider that in between the pure peace of sleep and awakening, the dream is the reconciliation of those two states. After meditation, contemplate the dream message. Consider it from the perspective that you are dreaming right now, and the message is that everything is fine, even this (whatever the dream was about). You will notice perspectives you’re believing, as to how ‘everything is not fine’. Those, can be let go in meditation. Maintain a journal for writing about how you feel. If meditation is overwhelming, don’t persist against the grain, write about how you’re feeling in your journal. Expressing in key. It is a ‘getting it out’, or emptying, by which being fills in. This is the same as saying misunderstanding is let go, and understanding arises. Add creative expression in your days with what feels right for you, such as; creative writing, drawing, learning an instrument, singing, sculpting, building, carving, dancing - any act of creating and expressing, which feels good to you. Sign up for a drawing or painting class, etc. Clarity, emotional intelligence, understanding, focus, patience, and more feeling / connection, are natural outcomes of this. Regarding meditation, loving yourself, journaling, expressing, and making changes: Do not ask others to accommodate you so that you can do this. Accommodate them, if needed, so that you can do this. Do not create conditions or contingencies which “allow” that you can do this. Refrain from entangling any other person in ‘enabling’ you. Simply get up earlier, and be patient when tired, you’ll be falling asleep earlier soon enough. Past trauma may be deeply entwined in the body, with regard to perspectives, and unknowingly suppressed, held out of the light of understanding. It is important to be humble, and be smart. Take advantage of all resources available to you. In addition to the things mentioned above, experience assistance bringing things to the surface, into the light, out into the open. That is relief. ’Getting it out’ is the key. Schedule time with practitioners of well being; massage, reiki, therapy, yoga, liberated experienced meditators, etc. Making the choice to directly experience is 99% of ‘the work’. Choose to experience the combination that feels best to you, but do not rule anything you have not experienced out. You will be glad. Proper Foundation The quality of tomorrow’s meditation is impacted by all of the above. Recognize those as the basics, your foundation. This is - first “cleaning the house”, “emptying the cup”. If you are not yet finding peace in meditation, the things above are likely insightful and actionable. Use them as a checklist, add to it what you learn works and doesn’t work for you. Understand why. Be mindful of the direct experience always, not the goal or outcome. Never do practices for the sake of getting them done. Never do practices with the intention or expectation of attaining, achieving, or becoming. Let go of these in your practices. Never force pracitices, and never guilt or shame yourself regarding practices. Let go of these in your practices. Likewise, never pride yourself on or claim the benefits of your practices. A phone which knows the truth of wifi, yet claims it as it’s own, is no longer listening to the wifi. It is always about letting go, and feeling the inner being, the source, within. Posture, Balance & Relaxation Sit with spine straight, entire body equally balanced, head tilted slightly forward. Scan for any muscles in tension - from balancing the body, and reposition in better balance. Repeat until seated in balance; drop all muscle tension, and see if you lean; if so, adjust again / reposition for balance. Relax every muscle, from crown of head, through body, to the toes - in waves of letting go, over and over. If you struggle to ‘find the particular muscle’ to be able to ‘let it go’, simply tense that muscle with the appropriate thought, ex: “tense the right shoulder” - this is to locate it specifically - only to relax it / let it go, specifically (only needed initially, if at all). Stay with each muscle until you feel it release: Feel the crown of the head muscles release, feel the temples release, feel the eye sockets release, feel the cheek muscles release, feel the neck muscles release, the shoulders, the upper back, the lower back, the arms, the hands, the fingers, the chest, the stomach, the hips, the thighs, the knees, the calves, the ankles, the feet, the toes - all tension pouring out through the toes. *Stay with each muscle until you feel it release, then move to the next. Be mindful, vigilant of any habit forming. Feel every step. Feel each specific muscle release. * Repeat this, from crown to toes, over and over, feeling each “pass” more deeply relaxing each targeted muscle than the pass before. Notice the entire body unifying in relaxation. Meditation Do not move the body, allow it to relax into deep sleep and disappear from sensation & awareness. Mind fully alert & present; awaken every cell, enthusiastic presence, a tiger at-the-ready to pounce. Notice all senses are one sense, being. Being is breathing, being is breathed in, being is breathed out. Notice the ineffable spaciousness, the silent emptiness. It is whole, perfect, calm, peaceful. It continues on in all directions. Revel in the perfect peace, in innocence, as you recognize the purity that you have always known. Allow Meditation “Practice” To Become A Meditative Lifestyle As you go about your day, notice this peace is still present, this silence, this being - is always present, always the soundbed underlying and allowing all sounds, the spaciousness underlying and allowing all objects and activities, the emptiness allowing all thoughts to arise. Carry this into each day, mindful of the effortless nature of awareness. Conscious of any tension in any muscle, relax it, mindful of the one sense; without identification, without reaction, peaceful non-engagement. Notice the arising perspectives of unification & connection. Surrender perspectives of separation by allowing them to pass, and return to the everpresent peace and silence which allows all things. When you notice reaction, wether muscular or mental, relax, detach by being again aware, non-reactionary. Even as reactions occur, wether physical, mental, or verbal, be aware of, not involved in. Relax crown to toes, effortless awareness is always available & ample. Notice the sound of a voice, is not the sound of your voice. Be that unattached, and that aware, ‘that’ voice is no longer your voice, it never was. You are all sounds, all voices, all things. Be aware all transpires in the ‘one sense’, precisely where it is seen, exactly where it is heard. One Sense, one awareness. Notice thoughts are not your thoughts, be aware thoughts are things, like trees are trees; there is no mechanism found for justification of “yours”, that is just another thought; awareness is unconditional and omnipresent, and never appears in pieces, and has never not appeared, it will never let you down. Notice there is one sense, one awareness, notice the body and mind are a body and mind which transpires in this peaceful awareness, notice a body and mind is not your body and mind, notice there is one sense, one awareness, all is transpiring and arising in. After some practice a couple new things arise... When you have ‘returned’ home, in the peace of non-reaction, the ‘finite ceo’ / “decision maker”/ over thinker/over thinking - naturally recedes, and well being of infinite intelligence will manipulate the body (it actually is “the body”) , aligning things, stretching things, cracking things, etc, just allow this. It’s difficult not to mentally react to this at first because it’s new, but just relax, it is curative, trust it - notice a person is not doing this, infinite intelligence is. Mindfully revel & appreciate this miracle. A word of caution regarding thought stories & dualistic narratives Meditation at it’s most basic level is focusing on breathing in the stomach & relaxing the body, thus indirectly detaching attention from thoughts. Thought ceases in activity, simply from not receiving attention. The body is infinite intelligence, but the thinking dualistic mind believes it’s running the show. This is brought to an end in meditation, in ‘returning to’, or realization of, who you really are. When the body relaxes deeply, it releases contractions; tension from emotions created in misunderstanding via one’s forgetting who one is and “making sense” of self & reality in an apparent physical universe & separate body. These ‘held’ tensions are the root cause of overthinking. The mind keeps churning in an attempt to resolve with thinking, what is only resolved in feeling. When the body (infinite intelligence / nothing to know) begins releasing the suppressed falsities (all knowledge & specifically the idea of “me”), the mind creates narratives of the experience to perpetuate “it’s control”. In perpetuating the misunderstandings, rather than relaxing & releasing the suppressed emotions by maintaining focus on stomach breathing, the mind (thinking) weaves & latches onto varies models of duality to control the narrative. (Kundalini, demons, assertion, death, nervous disorders, past “bad” trips, guilt, shame, unworthiness, fear, anxiety & past stories, depression & future stories, projections, deflections, identity, loss, sacrifice, etc) But meditation is focusing on breathing from the stomach & relaxing the body, and thus indirectly detaching from thoughts. To believe any narrative which arises in meditation, is to sustain and perpetuate the “idea of you”, so as not to ‘directly experience’, you. So if you don’t want to awaken, but enjoy the fundamental benefits of meditation, just meditate for twenty minutes a day. Ideally in the morning. If you do want to awaken, realize you got caught up in a thought story, and meditation was focusing on breathing from the stomach, and thus indirectly letting thinking go. The truth is the mind is making it all up, and the “fear” is the mind’s label to justify denying the truth “of itself”, the profound love that is, that you actually are. Write about how you feel and why, in a journal, to understand yourself & develop emotional intelligence. Talk to someone who listens, so you can express yourself and your emotions. Write what you want in this experience of life on your dreamboard, and allow the surfacing of desire & authenticity to help you realize & release resistance thoughts. Live the life you actually want to live, the way you actually want to live it. https://sites.google.com/site/psychospiritualtools/Home/meditation-practices Posture Meditation This body-based meditation is a very effective way to get grounded and centered. It encourages an embodied, calm, and open awareness, and discourages disassociation. If you have a tendency to "leave your body," feel ungrounded, or disassociated, this is a good practice. Sit with your spine straight and aligned, and the rest of your body relaxed. Keep bringing yourself back to this condition. 1. Take a reposed, seated posture. 2. For this meditation, it is very important that your spine is straight. Your neck and back should be in perfect alignment. Your chin should be down very slightly. 3. If you are sitting in a chair, do not rest your spine against the chair. Sit forward so that your spine is supporting its own weight. Let the muscles of the spine be engaged. 4. All the other muscles of your body can be completely relaxed. Allow your face muscles to let go, and your jaw to drop slightly, so that your teeth are not touching. 5. Let your shoulders hang freely, and let your belly be soft and open. 6. This is the posture you are aiming for, with your spine erect and your body completely relaxed. 7. As you sit, keep bringing your awareness back to the fine details of your posture. Notice any time your spine slumps even slightly, your head leans to either side, or any other deviation. Correct these gently and repeatedly. 8. Also notice if any other areas of your body tense up even slightly. If anything is tensing, relax it in a gently and soft manner. 9. Keep checking in with the body, using your body (somatic) awareness; the feeling in your body. Mental images of your body will probably arise, which is fine, but these are not what you are concentrating upon. Instead, concentrate your awareness in the sense of your body. The sensitivity in your muscles, tissues, viscera, skin, and so forth. 10. The more detailed and minute you get with this awareness, the better. Each tiny area of the body has its own sensitivity to contribute. 11. Every once in a while you can zoom out to cover the entire somatosensory field -- the awareness of your entire body -- to bring the overall body back into alignment. 12. Keep relaxing every muscle everywhere. Use just enough tension to keep your spine erect, but no more. 13. Continue this meditation for at least 10 minutes, continuously contacting your body awareness. CAUTIONS: If you have any spinal injuries or severe back pain, it is fine to allow your spine to rest in a pain-free position. If you find yourself distracted by a lot of mental chatter, you can use verbal labeling as an aid to concentration. For example, when checking on the spine, you can say to yourself, "spine in alignment." When checking on the body, say, "body relaxed." Awareness of Thoughts Meditation By learning to watch your thoughts come and go during this practice, you can gain deeper insight into thinking altogether (such as its transience) and into specific relationships among your thoughts and your emotions, sensations, and desires. This practice can also help you take your thoughts less personally, and not automatically believe them. Additionally, this meditation can offer insight into any habitual patterns of thinking and related reactions. Observe your thoughts as they arise and pass away. · By “thoughts,” we mean self-talk and other verbal content, as well as images, memories, fantasies, and plans. Just thoughts may appear in awareness, or thoughts plus sensations, emotions, or desires. · Sit or lie down on your back in a comfortable position. · Become aware of the sensations of breathing. · After a few minutes of following your breath, shift your attention to the various thoughts that are arising, persisting, and then passing away in your mind. · Try to observe your thoughts instead of getting involved with their content or resisting them. · Notice the content of your thoughts, any emotions accompanying them, and the strength or pull of the thought. · Try to get curious about your thoughts. Investigate whether you think in mainly images or words, whether your thoughts are in color or black and white, and how your thoughts feel in your body. · See if you notice any gaps or pauses between thoughts. · Every time you become aware that you are lost in the content of your thoughts, simply note this and return to observing your thoughts and emotions. · Remember that one of the brain’s major purposes is to think, and there is nothing wrong with thinking. You are simply practicing not automatically believing and grasping on to your thoughts. · When you are ready, return your attention to your breath for a few minutes and slowly open your eyes. Optional: · There are various metaphors and images you can use to help observe your thoughts. These include: o Imagining you are as vast and open as the sky, and thoughts are simply clouds, birds, or planes passing through the open space. o Imagining you are sitting on the side of a river watching your thoughts float by like leaves or ripples in the stream. o Imagine your thoughts are like cars, buses, or trains passing by. Every time you realize you are thinking, you can “get off the bus/train” and return to observing. Awareness of thoughts and emotions is one of the areas of focus developed when cultivating mindfulness. In Buddhism, mindfulness is one of the seven factors of enlightenment and the seventh instruction in the Noble Eightfold Path. The Seven Factors of Enlightenment: https://www.accesstoinsight.org/lib/authors/piyadassi/wheel001.html The Four Noble Truths:https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four_Noble_Truths The Noble Eightfold Path: https://tricycle.org/magazine/noble-eightfold-path/ CAUTIONS: Please be gentle with yourself if you notice that you are constantly caught up in your thoughts instead of observing them. This is both common and normal. When you realize that you are thinking, gently and compassionately return to observing your thoughts. If the content of your thoughts is too disturbing or distressing, gently shift your attention to your breathing, sounds, or discontinue the practice. · Remember that you are not trying to stop thoughts or only allow certain ones to arise. Try to treat all thoughts equally and let them pass away without engaging in their content. · This practice can initially be more challenging than other meditations. As you are learning, practice this meditation for only a few minutes at a time if that is easier. · It can be helpful to treat thoughts the same way that you treat sounds or body sensations, and view them as impersonal events that arise and pass away. · Some people like to assign numbers or nicknames to reoccurring thoughts in order to reduce their pull and effect. Breath Awareness Meditation Stress is an extremely unhealthy condition. It causes the body to release the chemical cortisol, which has been shown to reduce brain and organ function, among many other dangerous effects. Modern society inadvertently encourages a state of almost continuous stress in people. This is a meditation that encourages physical and mental relaxation, which can greatly reduce the effects of stress on the body and mind. Sit still and pay close attention to your breathing process. Take a reposed, seated posture. Your back should be straight and your body as relaxed as possible. Close your eyes, and bring your attention to your breathing process. Simply notice you are breathing. Do not attempt to change your breath in any way. Breath simply and normally. Try to notice both the in breath and the out breath; the inhale and the exhale. "Notice" means to actually feel the breathing in your body with your body. It is not necessary to visualize your breathing or to think about it in any way except to notice it with your somatic awareness. Each time your attention wanders from the act of breathing, return it to noticing the breath. Do this gently and without judgment. Remember to really feel into the act of breathing. If you want to go more deeply into this, concentrate on each area of breathing in turn. Here is an example sequence: 1. Notice how the air feels moving through your nostrils on both the in breath and the out breath. 2. Notice how the air feels moving through your mouth and throat. You may feel a sort of slightly raspy or ragged feeling as the air moves through your throat. This is normal and also something to feel into. 3. Notice how the air feels as it fills and empties your chest cavity. Feel how your rib cage rises slowly with each in breath, and gently deflates with each out breath. 4. Notice how your back expands and contracts with each breath. Actually feel it shifting and changing as you breath. 5. Notice how the belly expands outward with each in breath and pulls inward with each in breath. Allow your attention to fully enter the body sensation of the belly moving with each breath. 6. Now allow your attention to cover your entire body at once as you breath in and out. Closely notice all the sensations of the body as it breathes. Repeat this sequence over and over, giving each step your full attention as you do it. Suggested time is at least 10 minutes. Thirty minutes is better, if you are capable of it. If you find yourself distracted by a lot of mental chatter, you can use verbal labeling as an aid to concentration. For example, on the in breath, mentally say to yourself, "Breathing in." On the out breath, say, "Breathing out." Another possibility is to mentally count each breath. Self Inquiry This is a meditation technique to get enlightened, i.e. "self realization." By realizing who you are, the bonds of suffering are broken. Besides this goal, self-inquiry delivers many of the same benefits as other meditation techniques, such as relaxation, enhanced experience of life, greater openness to change, greater creativity, a sense of joy and fulfillment, and so forth. Focus your attention on the feeling of being "me," to the exclusion of all other thoughts. 1. Sit in any comfortable meditation posture. 2. Allow your mind and body to settle. 3. Now, let go of any thinking whatsoever. 4. Place your attention on the inner feeling of being "me." 5. If a thought does arise (and it is probable that thoughts will arise on their own), ask yourself to whom this thought is occurring. This returns your attention to the feeling of being "me." Continue this for as long as you like. This technique can also be done when going about any other activity. CAUTIONS: Many people misunderstand the self-inquiry technique to mean that the person should sit and ask themselves the question, "Who am I?" over and over. This is an incorrect understanding of the technique. The questions "Who am I" or "To whom is this thought occurring?" are only used when a thought arises, in order to direct attention back to the feeling of being "me." At other times the mind is held in silence. This practice of Self-attention or awareness of the ‘I’-thought is a gentle technique, which bypasses the usual repressive methods of controlling the mind. It is not an exercise in concentration, nor does it aim at suppressing thoughts; it merely invokes awareness of the source from which the mind springs. The method and goal of self-enquiry is to abide in the source of the mind and to be aware of what one really is by withdrawing attention and interest from what one is not. In the early stages effort in the form of transferring attention from the thoughts to the thinker is essential, but once awareness of the ‘I’-feeling has been firmly established, further effort is counter-productive. From then on it is more a process of being than doing, of effortless being rather than an effort to be. Do Nothing Meditation Many respected spiritual traditions, including Buddhism and Hindu Advaita just to name two, claim that the highest state of spiritual communion is actually present in our minds at all times. And yet many meditation techniques focus on creating some special state that wasn't there before the meditation, and which goes away at some point after the meditation. If the highest state is actually present all the time, shouldn't it be possible to simply notice it without inducing some change, or special state? That is exactly the purpose of the Do Nothing Meditation. This technique (which is really an un-technique) will allow you to contact the highest spiritual state without actually doing anything. Each time you notice an intention to control or direct your attention, give it up. 1. There is no need to get into any particular posture, unless you feel like it. 2. Do not position your attention in any particular way. 3. Let whatever happens happen. 4. Any time you notice yourself doing anything intentionally, stop. Doing anything intentionally means something you can voluntarily control, and therefore can stop. If you cannot stop doing something, then it's not intentional, and therefore you don't need to try to stop doing it. So. Anything you can stop doing, stop doing. Some examples of things you can stop doing are: * Intentionally thinking * Trying to focus on something specific * Trying to have equanimity * Trying to keep track of what's going on * Trying to meditate Let go of doing anything like this. 5. Keep doing nothing for at least 10 minutes, or as long as you like. CAUTIONS: It may be difficult for some people to notice any difference between the Do Nothing meditation and gross "monkey mind," that is, the ceaseless, driven and fixated thoughts of the everyday neurotic mind. If this seems to be the case for you, it may be helpful to do a more structured technique. Concentration (One-Pointedness) Meditation One of the hallmarks of modern life is the proliferation of distractions. As media become more pervasive, and media connections more ubiquitous, time away from distractions becomes ever harder to find. Previously, people were content to sit in restaurants, or stand in line, without a television screen to stare at. Now these have become standard. The result of all this, and many other causes, is that people find it increasingly difficult to focus their minds. Concentration is a necessary human skill. It makes proper thinking possible, increases intelligence, and allows a person to calm down and achieve their goals more effectively. A concentrated mind is like a laser beam, able to use all its powers in a single direction to great effect. Concentration is critical to many human endeavors. Being able to listen to another person, for example, in a compassionate and connected manner requires being able to shut out distractions. The experience of making love can be greatly enhanced when one is not, for example, thinking about other things. Concentration allows a person to stop being a "reaction machine" or "robot," simply responding to stimulii, and instead to become more thoughtful, self-directed, and confident. Concentration is an interesting thing. It is a very general ability. That means developing concentration in one area will help you concentrate in ALL areas. So, for example, if you learn to concentrate on a particular idea, it not only helps you think about that idea (which would be very limited), but actually helps you to concentrate on anything, which is very generally useful for everything! It's like lifting weights. It doesn't just make you strong for lifting weights, but strong for anything else you want to do! Think about one thing. Every time you get distracted, return to that one thing. 1. Find an object on which to concentrate. This can be a physical object, like a pebble or a feather. Or it can be a mental object like a particular idea. It could even be, say, your homework. 2. Cut off any sources of distraction. These include, but are not limited to, telephones, emails, computers, music, television, and so forth. Turn all of these off during your concentration practice. 3. Begin your period of by mentally reminding yourself what you are concentrating on. 4. Now begin to concentrate. If your concentration object is an external object, this may mean looking at it. If it is a mental object, then think about it. If it is your homework, then do it now. 5. Each time your mind (or eyes) wander from your concentration object, bring it back to the object. It is important to do this very gently and without judgment. 6. Repeat this process of coming back to the concentration object for as long as you wish, or until your homework is done. Cultures worldwide have developed concentration practices for both spiritual and practical reasons. Concentration is called dharana in Hinduism, and samadhi or shamatha in Buddhism. It is considered to be a key skill for meditation. CAUTIONS: Concentration can at first seem to trigger a lot of anxiety. This is, however, not the fault of the concentration practice. Rather, it happens because many people use distraction to avoid feeling emotions. Then when the distractions are removed, a tremendous amount of ambient, unprocessed emotions (i.e. emotions you are feeling but were unaware of feeling) are present. So it is not the practice of concentration that is causing anxiety, but instead it is the habit of distracting ourselves from our emotions. This may be the root cause of much inability to focus and concentrate. If that is the case, try meditating on emotions (below). Concentration and meditation are not the same thing, although they are related. Meditation (usually) requires concentration, but also requires relaxation or equanimity. Emotional Awareness Meditation This meditation brings about a great deal of equanimity with emotions. They will not seem to affect us as deeply or adversely. Many people have trouble contacting their emotions directly. Even if we feel that we know what emotion we are having, that does not necessarily mean that we are contacting it directly. To contact an emotion directly means to feel it in the body. This is the opposite of most people's experience, which is to related ideas about the emotion. Here is an example. A person asks you how you are feeling. You respond by saying, "I am angry, because..." You then go on to tell the person all the reasons you are angry. In this example, only the first three words, "I am angry" have anything to do with contacting emotion. All the rest of the explanation is about concepts. A fuller example of contacting emotions directly, that is somatically, would be to say, "I am angry. I can feel a sort of gripping tension in my belly that is uncomfortable. The tense area feels kind of twisted and sharp. Parts of it are throbbing. It also feels like it is radiating heat outwards." Notice that the cause of the anger is irrelevant. The practice here is to feel the physical expression of the anger as completely as possible. Extended practice of this meditation will bring about "skill at feeling," that is, a tremendous amount of clarity in the emotional world. Emotional intelligence. It will also help emotions to process and release much more quickly and completely, because we are not holding on to ideas about the emotions. The body processes emotion quickly, naturally, and fully. Feel the physical expression of an emotion as completely as possible. 1. Settle into a comfortable meditation posture. 2. Breathing normally, bring your attention to your emotions. Notice if you are feeling any emotions, no matter how faintly. It is not necessary to know precisely which emotion you are having, or why you are having it. Just knowing that you are feeling something emotional is enough. Guessing is OK. 3. Once you detect an emotion, see if you can find its expression in your body. Maybe there is a feeling of tension, gripping, tightening, burning, twisting, throbbing, pressure, lightness, openness, etc. 4. If you like, you can mentally make the label "feel" when you detect a body sensation of emotion. Other labels are possible ("emotion" for example). 5. Each time you detect an emotional body sensation, try to actually feel the sensation in your body, as completely as possible. Feel it through and through. 6. Completely let go of any ideas you have about the emotion, or self talk you might have about why the emotion is arising. Return to the body sensation of the emotion. 7. Continue contacting these emotional body sensations for as long as you wish. Meditating on emotions is a traditional part of Vipassana practice in Buddhism. It is, for example, one of the four main techniques covered in the Vissudhimagga (The Path to Purity), an important Buddhist text. (The version presented here is a summary of a practice given by American Buddhist teacher Shinzen Young.) At first, practicing this meditation may make it seem as if the emotions are getting bigger. If they are negative emotions, this may seem overwhelming for a while. This is natural. It is occuring not because the emotions are actually getting bigger, but for two interesting reasons. The first is because we are no longer suppressing them. We are allowing them to actually express themselves fully. The second is because we are observing them (actually feeling them) very closely. Just as a microscope makes small things look bigger, the "microscope" of attention makes the emotional body sensations seem larger than they really are. The good news here is that as the emotions express themselves freely in the body, they are being processed. Usually this means that they will pass much more quickly. If we are feeling a positive emotion in this way, it may pass quickly, but we will also derive much more satisfaction from it, because our experience of it is so rich and complete. If we are feeling a negative emotion in this way, we will experience much less suffering from it, because we are not resisting and suppressing it. Equanimity Meditation The cause of much of our upset and emotional instability is clinging and neediness around people we like, and aversion and negativity towards people we don't like. We also have an unhealthy indifference to strangers, who may need our help, or at least our good will. This equanimity meditation helps us to examine our feelings towards people, and correct them where they are mistaken. This leads to a more balanced, wholesome, and helpful viewpoint. It also cuts off a lot of emotional turmoil at its root. Meditate on three people (a loved one, an enemy, and a neutral person), examining and correcting your feelings toward them. 1. Sit in a comfortable meditation posture. Follow your breath until you feel centered and grounded. 2. Bring to mind the images of three people: someone you like, someone you dislike, and someone towards whom you feel indifferent. Keep these three people in mind throughout the meditation. 3. Focus on the friend, and look into all the reasons you like this person. Try to see if any of the reasons are about things this person does for you, or ways they uplift your ego. Ask yourself if these are really the correct reasons to like someone. Then do the same thing with the person you dislike, instead asking about the reasons you dislike them. Finally, do this for the person you are indifferent towards, asking about the reasons for your indifference. In all cases, notice where your ego is involved in the judgment of the other person's worth. 4. Next, ask yourself whether you consider each of these relationships as permanent. Would you still like your friend if they did something terrible to you? What if the person you dislike really did something nice for you? What if the stranger became close to you? Think about all the relationships in the past in which your feelings about the person have dramatically changed. 5. Now, visualize the person you like doing something you dislike or that is unacceptable to you. Would you still be their friend? Remember that many people have changed from friends to enemies in the past. There are people who you used to like, toward whom you now feel emnity. Think about how there is no special reason to feel good about a person who is only temporarily your friend. 6. Next, visualize your enemy doing something very kind for you. They might visit you in the hospital, or help you to fix your home. When you imagine this, can you feel positive emotions toward this person? Can you remember times in the past when an enemy became a friend? Is it necessary to feel that your strong dislike for this person will last forever? Isn't it possible that they could someday become your friend? 7. Now visualize the stranger. How would you feel about them if they did something very kind for you? Isn't it the case that all your current friends were at one point total strangers? Isn't it possible that a stranger could become your best friend? It has happened before. 8. Think carefully about how everyone deserves equal regard as human beings. You must discriminate and make decisions based on your knowledge of a person's character, but you do not have to hold strong feelings or judgments towards them. It is very likely that your emotions around a person will change many times, so why hold onto these emotions so rigidly? In Buddhism, equanimity means a very deep, even profound, state of mental balance and stability. It is considered one of the seven factors of enlightenment, and a hallmark of the third and fourth jhanas, which are deep states of meditative absorption. This is a traditional meditation from Mahayana Buddhism. Its goal is to arouse "bodhicitta' or the mind of enlightenment. There are other equanimity meditations from other Buddhist lineages (e.g., Theravadan), as well as from other contemplative traditions. (The version presented here is adapted from the book How to Meditate: A Practical Guide.) CAUTIONS: It can be upsetting to bring an "enemy" to mind. When working with the mental image of an enemy, be careful not to get lost in negative thoughts and feelings. If you find that you can't handle working with a specific person without getting very worked up, switch to someone less upsetting. Body Scan Meditation The Body Scan is designed to help you feel and bring awareness to the myriad of sensations that occur throughout your body. By practicing this meditation regularly, you can improve your body awareness and also better work with pain and difficult emotions in the body. Additionally, people report feelings of relaxation and renewal after this practice. Sit or lie on your back and systematically bring your attention to each region of your body, beginning with your feet and moving upwards. As you begin: · Sit or lie down on your back in a comfortable position with your eyes open or gently closed. · Take a moment to check-in with yourself, observing how you are feeling in your body and mind. · Begin to focus on your breath wherever the sensations are most vivid for you. During the body scan: · Try to bring an attitude of curiosity to the practice, as if you are investigating your body for the first time. · Notice and feel any and all sensations that are present, such as tingling, tightness, heat, cold, pressure, dullness, etc. · If you do not feel any sensations in a particular region, simply note that and move on. · See if you can be aware of any thoughts or emotions that arise as you move through the regions of your body. Note these thoughts and emotions, and then return to the bare physical sensations that you are experiencing. · Whenever you come across an area that is tense, see if you can allow it to soften. If the area does not soften, simply notice how it feels and allow it to be as it is. · Feel as deeply and precisely as you can into each region of the body, noting if the sensations change in any way. Also notice where they are located. · If you notice any pain or discomfort in a region of the body, see if you can practice allowing and exploring it for even a few seconds, feeling the various aspects of the sensation(s). Suggested sequence of body parts: · Begin with your left foot and toes, then move awareness up the left leg until you reach the left hip. · Right foot and toes up the right leg until you reach the right hip. · Pelvic region and buttocks, stomach, low back to upper back, chest and breasts, heart and lungs · Hands (both at the same time) then move up the arms until you finish with the shoulders. · Neck, throat, jaw, mouth (teeth, tongue, lips), nose, eyes, forehead, ears, skull and scalp. · Finally, become aware of the whole body and rest for a few minutes in this expansive awareness. The Body Scan is a variation of a Burmese Vipassana meditation practice that involves scanning the body for physical sensations. This meditation is also done in various yoga practices. The Body Scan is used in Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR), created by Jon Kabat-Zinn, Ph.D. CAUTIONS: If you have experienced physical abuse or trauma in the past, it is not recommended to do this practice without a trained professional. Additionally, if you notice intense fear or other strong emotions related to a particular part of the body, please discontinue this practice. It is generally advised to take at least 30 to 40 minutes to complete the body scan. However, if you wish to do a shorter body scan, spend less time on each region of the body, and/or focus on both feet, legs, and arms together as you move through these regions. If you wish, you can practice the body scan in the opposite direction, moving from your head to your toes. Walking Meditation Walking meditation is a great way to begin integrating the power of meditation into your daily life. It is the first stage of meditation in action, that is, learning to be meditative while "out and about" in the world. It is great to do while, for example, taking a walk in the park, at the beach, or in another natural setting. Walking meditation is often recommended for people who are doing a lot of sitting meditation. If you are getting to sleepy, or your awareness is getting to "muddy," walking meditation can perk you up. Alternately, if you are getting to concentrated and mentally "stiff," walking meditation is a perfect way to loosen up a bit. Walking meditation is a common practice in Vipassana and Zen Buddhism. Pay close attention to the physical activity of walking slowly 1. Before walking, stand still in an open, balanced posture. Bring your awareness to the feeling of your feet touching the ground. 2. Now begin walking. Keep your gaze fixed on the ground about six feet in front of you. This will help you to avoid distraction. 3. Note and mentally label three parts of each step you take. The labels are "lifting," "pushing," and "dropping." Lifting - when you are picking your foot up Pushing - as you are moving it forward Dropping - as you are lowering it to the ground As you make each label, pay very close attention to the actual physical sensations associated with each of these actions. 4. After these three components become clear, you can add three more, so that the entire sequence is: "raising," "lifting," "pushing," "dropping," "touching," and "pressing." 5. Your mind will probably also engage in thinking extraneous thoughts, but just allow these to go on in the background. Your foreground attention should stay on the physical sensations of walking. 6. If you find that you have been completely lost in thought, stop walking for a moment and label the thinking as "thinking, thinking, thinking." 7. Then re-establish your awareness on the feeling in your feet, and begin the walking meditation again. 8. A typical session of walking meditation lasts a half an hour. CAUTIONS: Make sure to watch where you are going, especially if you are around traffic, other people, etc. https://sites.google.com/site/psychospiritualtools/Home/meditation-practices The Yoda Meditation https://www.thedailymeditation.com/learning-to-meditate-with-jedi-master-yoda-online-meditation-course/amp The Neo / Matrix Meditation https://www.dc-acupuncture.com/lifestyle-personal-transformation/how-meditation-makes-you-more-like-neo-from-the-matrix F That - A guided Meditation https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=92i5m3tV5XY

I don't understand the idea of "defeating the ego". It seems that just empowers the ego. For me, it's more about the awareness that the ego exists and is illusionary. And for me, the traditional concept of "understanding" is loaded with ego. This mysterious impersonal infinite consciousness seems beyond the traditional use of "understand". I suppose one could use the term in a novel way, yet at that point I'd prefer to use a new term to avoid confusion.

I can't recognize, how much of me is actually in the yellow stage. I'm usually very impersonal, not as in concentrating on others, but separating 'me' from my thoughts, and contemplating a lot about a number of things. I went through both orange and green, when I was in middle school. Green was the most prominent phase of my life, which spanned almost 2-3 years . But now, I feel like as if my orange and green parts have become more subconscious ( Influencing my feelings, thought pattern starters, etc.) But are still a big part of me ( 1/3rd each). For example, one of my deepest motivations come from excelling at something, and not being the crowd average; I can very easily put myself into someone's shoes, etc. Am I misleading myself at this stage or is this correct, guys?

Well, you have to contemplate the very nature of life to understand this idea of "world peace" and "no more evil". Consider that to be alive one must destroy and kill. At the most fundamental level, life needs to take energy from other life in order to live because it is one, and so cannot get energy elsewhere. Even if you somehow miraculously made every human a sage, all those sages would still need to kill to live. Even if they all became vegans, human cities still kill millions of animals just with their footprint alone. So this "world peace" wouldn't really be world peace, it would be peace for 1 species out of millions of other species. The only way you could call it "peace" is by saying "no other being's suffering matters but humans". Which wouldn't be a very sage-like position. The true sage understands that suffering, inequality, death, and "evil" are absolutely necessary, making his peace with that fact, rather than trying to turn the world into a hippie Care Bear kingdom, where nobody's farts stink. Reality is brutal and impersonal. It will find ways to fuck your peace. What happens when robots rise up and exterminate mankind the same way mankind exterminates ants? Will you be at peace with that? It sure will be peaceful when all the humans are dead and AIs of much higher consciousness are running the show. But my guess is, humans won't think of that as "world peace", they will think if it as the greatest evil.

Yes, but that's what I mean. In my understanding, the illusionist is impersonal awareness. How can something impersonal be alone? Isn't the aloneness factor a dimension added by individuality? What I'm saying is there needs to be an "I" for loneliness and aloneness. Otherwise to whom are these attributes pointing to? There's no one there. The illusionist is not an entity, as my investigation is leading me to believe. To explain what I mean even simpler: Aloneness and Loneliness mean: I + no-one else. If there is no "I", this is nonsensical.

Combine mindfulness with Self-enquiry. Otherwise perceptions will be tainted by the colour of identification. The impersonal mind will get you to the Truth. Also this should be helpful.

Interesting. There seems to be something here that is blocking your realisation. There seems to be a belief that awareness (the attributeless impersonal no-self) cannot know itself by being itself in it's purest. That it can only do it through appearing as sense perceptions (stuff) first. This is because you're indeed looking in the wrong direction. This is still content in the formless. That field of impersonal aware blankness is infinitely greater than the bodymind - the believed doer of the inquiry, so it can't be understood by mind, which you Still seem to be trying to do. Surrender, acceptance, practice. See everything as it is in your next meditation. Don't refer to past - this means that all you should be left with is the image of blackness, the sounds present, the feelings present and the sense of I am. Now defocus froma any of these objects and just Be the space for them. Allow the awakening. Feel yourself as That vastness. If the mind is looking it will look like nothingness, so only the objects will be seen. Mind needs to land on objects to know itself, unlike awareness.

I think that this excerpt from The Impersonal Life might help you with your struggle. Relax yourself, take a few deep breaths and read it with open mind. The I in this text is your Enlightened, Impersonal Self, the Real You. BTW I find this book a real goldmine for self-inquiry topics.

@Socrates Reality has no substance my friend. It is the Only Living substance by what is apart from it is nothing at all. Reality is the most subtle of subtle which is the source, sustainer and cause of all causes. Reality is the alpha and the omega the truth and the light. Reality is The Living ONE situated in all hearts as ONE. Reality is but an impersonal name for You, or You That is personified- seen in a universal form which is the ONE controller over all living entities. Reality = Living ONE. Ahayah Ashar Ahayah Socrates. Chant and be free!

Different tratiotions view this differently, so there are no objective answer. Buddha thought enlightenment as consisting of four stages where reaching each stage gives a direct glimse of emptiness, and leads to a permanent shift of the mind. He allso taught that insight into non-self is just one of the three fundamental insights into the nature of reality (along with nonsatisfacoriness and impermanence) required for enlightenment. Geffory Martin has performed depth interviews with 1000s of contemplatives from most major contemplative traditions, who are viewed as highly realized within their own respective tradition. His conclusion is that there are roughly four different categories of cognitive/phenomenological shifts that practitioners can experience, depending on the methods used. These include shifts in sense of self, emotions, thought paterns etc. All of these can be viewed as "enlightenment" / the ultimate spiritual goal from various contemplative traditions. F.i, in the christian/bramanistic mystical traditions the endpoint is a sense of unity with gods love/allness, which is stage three in Martins scheme. In Buddhism the endpoint is eradication of the sense of there being a Self (There is no core in your mind that is "me". Our mind is just some kind of hierarchi of partialy cooperating, partialy competing mental processes that produce mental phenomena that constantly apear and disapear in a field of awareness, which is also not "you", but just another impersonal mental mechanism/aggregate), combined with insight into impermanence and dissatisfactoriness.

Your paradigm. The only one that truly matters. It's a bit counter-intuitive. All truth is internal not external, personal not impersonal. Physics, or any conceptual body of knowledge for that matter, only matters to the extent that it matters to you. To the extent that you can take those insights and weave them into your ever-evolving worldview, that's what matters. Much of what we learn dies away. It's what we keep that is important. And that always comes back to your paradigm. That toolkit of concepts, heuristics, and expectations that you carry around with you and actually work with on a daily basis. What's in there? How can you improve it? How can exposure to Leo's ideas help you to improve that toolkit? Conversely, how can that bum on the street that tried to hustle money off you help you improve that toolkit? See, it's all you optimizing your knowledge grab-bag, your toolkit. It's all about your paradigm and taking responsibility for improving it, for honing it. It's all about what does this information do for you that is the relevant issue. Always. And then when you get a broad paradigm built, you might be so abundant that you condescend to advise others, because you've likely made every mistake in the book by that point and want to reduce suffering of others. This is, in part, what makes person want to be a philosopher or teacher or guru or whatever you want to call it. Mastery of that knowledge grab-bag and seeing that worldview for what it is. Nice! I got away with using a sentence fragment there.

Okay a little soon for an update but hey I have a bit of time now. So today so far I remained I would say 70-75% aware. I had many things to take care of so my main focus was the task at hand, but when an emotion arose I stopped and increased awareness to 100%. I notice that it is the smallest triggers that create a snowball such a large emotional reaction. The biggest issue today was my ego leaving the present to push me to the future to rush through what I am presently doing. The ego leaving like that creates anxiety, frustration and an inability to focus. This I noticed would cause me to become frustrated at small things in the present that are not going perfectly, which I noticed in the past create a mental disconnect which causes mistakes to happen. So yesterday I didnt make much of an effort to remain aware. I just kind of winged it like I usually have in the past. I never really saw a need for further awareness because I had defeated the flaws in my personality to control perceived negative emotions. Now I realize that I can't really have too much awareness. I know that I need to further my consciousness as the universe never really allows me to settle with what I have. I noticed yesterday from the lack of effort. I really didnt have a great day. I was exhausted and a bit neurotic. Comparing yesterday to Monday is like day and night. Monday was amazing, beautiful, full of life and love. I must keep going to realize the differences of no progression and progression. I am now getting ready to work. This I feel will be a challenge. Edit Today has been interesting. I challenged myself at the beginning of today to keep my awareness and to have fun with the challenge of staying awake. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. It was soothing almost. Like everything is going to be okay because your hero is here, and nothing can go wrong now. I like this feeling. During meditation I was able to glimpse the beauty of the universe. But when it came to making it a part of me it was never a part fully. Because I would meditate and stop. It truly has been an extreme boost to my consciousness evolution to understand the importance of this full awareness. Another thing I would like to add. I know this sounds crazy, but now that I am being more aware. I am getting the feeling of being watched a lot. But not like some one is watching.... More like something? Like the world around me is watching me more and responding to my change in awareness. This is just a physical sensation that I keep getting so who knows! Another thing I have gathered today is that.... I work with people over the phone. I used to hate it because its so impersonal and I do talk to a lot of people. Its emotionally draining. Or it was? Turns out with awareness its actually empowering in a way. But anyways... When I interact with people I feel very connected to them with this heightened awareness. Like I hear their voice and instantly feel how they are feeling, respond in a way that somehow brings them to a good energy helps them remember the beauty of the world if not for a moment. What I am observing brings something I learned about years ago (isnt that always the case with this work lol). Anyways, it brings back something that really resonated with me. Service to self or service to others. This theory is basically that when you are constantly trying to take take take, the universe responds with resistance. But when you are giving giving giving... The universe changes and responds with an abundant world. Its the whole fractal thing. The way you see things is how they become, we are but living beings in a fractal universe reflecting our consciousness right back at us. This is what I believe from my research anyways. So. I couldn't comprehend this giving. Not really. I was resistant, I would force, frustration would result and repeat. I came from a very dog eat dog family, mindset, world. This is why I only recently realized how amazing cooking is. If you really break cooking down. Its a very loving giving thing. You are taking pain away from others. You are nourishing their life, their happiness.. Giving them time to do other things they would rather do instead of cook. This to me is an ultimate service to others thing. Its funny because in my family cooking was never special, it sucked, it was a huge inconvenience and it often led to a fight on who would cook. Subconsciously this actually led to severe anxiety when thinking about cooking, cooking, washing dishes, looking for recipes to cook, grocery shopping. Once I became aware this previously scarred activity became nothing, I wouldnt get anxiety but I never wanted to cook. Because a tiny tiny part of me still resisted. Not until full awareness came did I realize this resistance and put the whole puzzle together. Its a silly thing. But that is what we are, we get a microscopic resistance and it snowballs into a monster in my life. I believe the path of awareness is us literally decreasing the tolerance we have for these negative influences over and over till we realize happiness resides within the awareness itself. Today has been a good day. One thing I want to make sure I have stressed is that because I have changed today, the world changed how it approaches me. I talk to people from all over the world. My consciousness somehow changed how they approach me. What I do is fast paced and stressful, yet I am almost finished and I am not exhausted. From a high awareness great day on Monday, to a exhausting no awareness Tuesday, to a high awareness no exhaustion Wednesday... Interesting.

God (Isvara- In Vedanta) is a personification of the impersonal "dharma field" (the manifest universe). Isvara is the creator-sustainer-destroyer of all of manifestation, which governs the physical, psychological, moral/ethical laws, as well as dishing out cause and effect relating to karma (action). Isvara came into being by a power within pure awareness itself called Maya, which created the illusion or appearance of the phenomenal world.

Don't worry. You can always find ways to resolve emotional issues even if they are established in childhood. So, it can get better. One thing that's helped me is to recognize that I'm just part of an impersonal pattern. So, my issues were mainly with my mom, and I've carried a lot of anger toward her. However, I see now that she really didn't see herself as being in the wrong and even was able to convince herself that she has the best intentions for me. I also see that she is the way she is due to her upbringing, and that my grandparents are the way they are due to their upbringing, and so on and so on. Most people don't do intentionally malicious things. So, in seeing this, it's easier to give forgiveness on this level. Once you've let go to a certain degree, you can start to face the emotions head on with awareness. If you focus on how the body and mind work together to create the experience of trauma, you'll get new insights into why the trauma reaction is so tenacious in the first place. If you focus on the emotional reactions that arise in the body with full awareness, it will enable you to process through the most negative stored emotions.

Hey -- What you have is a great vision, and who's to say it will stop there? We never "arrive", anyways." Go as far as you can see, and when you see farther, go farther" (or something like that). They say that when humans try to conceive of themselves being 10+ years older, the part of their brain that activates is the same part that conceives of a stranger. Even thinking of ourselves 5 years ahead makes us feel detached and impersonal subconsciously, so it's really hard to set meaningful goals beyond a certain point. And by changing yourself into a more conscious person, you will change the world. Think of the impact it will have on your friends and family to see this radical transformation: from no degree to degree, to being fit and healthy, fulfilling career... etc. Finding your Life Purpose will also change the world - Leo has a whole course on it Best of luck! Saba

Look at experience really closely. Forget the extraneous concepts and loaded meanings of words like awareness, which have about 6 or 7 different meanings, most of which suggest that something is aware of something else. This creates a ton of space for the self to pick and choose which one suits is, but the word or meaning that one seems to attach to the meaning is missing what is being pointed to. It creates discussions that feel important, but generally devolve into people asserting whose meaning of awareness is correct. The reason the word is used is just to express what is absolutely indescribable. Is it your experience that you control your thoughts? When you look at it, Do you honestly know what your next thought will be? If you look honestly, past the surface level. you will see that thoughts just pop up from absolute nothing. They appear. It may seem that they are willed, but generally they just appear when something needs to be explained or understood. They are mental interpretations that just happen to explain what is whether that is a problem, an emotion, or another thought. There is 0 control over what happens, and there is zero control over the mental interpretation that tries to make a conceptual model to explain what is happening. In my experience, when the feeling of control fell away when thoughts were watched, it was seen that if thoughts appear from nothing, then there cant be any free will, because the genesis of any intention or decision is an idea or thought, or at least I thought that. Really things just happen, but either way, its the same thing. What does a decision look like for you? When does the decision happen, and when does the thinking happen. In my experience, Observation showed that although I originally thought that thinking preceded a thought, actually a more honest answer is that there would be a decision, and then thinking would happen in the form of rationalization. This means the mind would start creating stories to explain what was decided. First there would be a story that made sense to the self, then there would be stories created for other individuals. It is like the self making a story based on the model it has of other peoples models. It wants the perfect story to explain the decision so that it can deliver the right story to each person so that it might make sense of whats happening. Then I thought, well, what about the times where it seems that I am thinking and then coming to a decision? But again, thoughts just appear. They do not belong to the self. So either way, there is a decision and thoughts which both arise from nothing. The order doesn't even matter. If mental activity just appears in the conscious mind, there is no meaningful choice. It's a complete and utter illusion The best saying that I have heard is: "A man can do what he wills but he cannot will what he wills." I don't know how anyone can argue with that, because no one can control the thoughts that appear in consciousness. People will argue with it, because it's not a very happy thing for the self, or maybe it doesn't fit in with other concepts that are held, but the thing is that reality or what happens doesn't give a fuck about conceptual understanding or a self's attempt to project its thought onto what is. How could it? The thoughts are actually a part of reality, they occur inside of it, and they are abstract. Therefore thoughts themselves are not reality (no matter how much the self wishes that to be true). It is completely impersonal and totally intimate. This is why it is important to remember that a contradiction between what meaning is assigned to concept in ones mind vs. what is being pointed to does not mean that something is wrong. Reality is totally unknowable. It exists outside of concepts. It is only a thought (the self) that is trying to lock it down into the known that causes contradiction. This is pretty simplistic as an explanation, and I'm not saying that conceptual understanding is bad, but just advising some caution. This is especially so when the subject is something as fundamental as free agency. Just look really closely and honestly at your experience. Reality and being is where some of the answers can be supplied.

The minute a person thinks that life is happening to them, a victim is born. Reality is impersonal, it just happens as it does regardless of what is believed about it. The great news is that you are the untouchable canvass that provides the space for it to happen. Nothing has ever happened to you, that is the misunderstanding that I struggled with. The self thought thinks that reality is happening to it, but that thought is just another thing happening. Self loves to be a victim because it hides the truth. All of these thoughts, and every other sensation is constantly changing and morphing, but there is one things that is always constant. Just do your best to abide in what is always present, and has never been touched by anything arising. For me, it was all about dis-identifying with thoughts by watching them and recognizing that I had no control over them, and they couldn't be what I am. For me, the moment I truly saw that thoughts are not in my control, and that the feeling that I am controlling them was a farce, It all began to fade. There was a short time of depression, but then I realized that if this was the case, it had always been this way, and so there was nothing to be upset about. Really watch and be attentive to thoughts and decisions. Every answer you need is contained in those experiences. A lot of enlightenment stuff is said to be mystical and amazing, but the thing is that this can be a huge distraction. The base of it from this perspective is simply watching and being attentive to thought processes, and then it falls into place. Just keep working at it, and don't let thoughts scare you off. Some may not agree, but I can only speak from my experience, and the labyrinth of mind is often contradictory. Stick with it.

The thing with humans is, most of the time it depends on the energy that you have with it as to how they will respond. If there's any validation seeking (which be aware, with family members should actually be quite common), there is a higher chance they will blow it off. Show in behavior would be the best by far (let them ask why you are so peaceful). Second, maybe question them if they think they are their thoughts and body and why? And casually present a few good arguments as to why that's maybe not so: the body changes, thoughts change, awareness seems impersonal and so universal and just see what that does

Day 5: I just had two profoundly different experiences with the University I used to attend. The first experience was with a program called career connect. Woke up early no traffic heading to the Valley and finding parking easily then being driven to the place we were going to have the orientation. My favorite part of the whole thing wasn't exactly the orientation but, it was the ride there. Being in the shuttle going down the freeway and while others were talking to people I mostly sat there silent staring out the window and looking up at the clouds. It reminded me of simpler times when my parents would drive me places and I'd sit in the car just not saying anything and just staring out the window. Those were some of the fondest memories I'd had of my youth. The best of the best was looking out a planes window and just admiring a birds eye view. So as I sat there we arrived at our destination got to say hi to all the people working there and got to know the inner workings of the cruise line they worked for. I also had a really friendly chat with a person who worked there and we kind of got to know each other. I had no problem speaking and socializing. I shared with him stories about my travels and it related to the industry to since it was cruise ships and that's about hospitality. Then on the shuttle ride back I felt the same way just looking out the window and enjoying that view. Today on the other hand the experience wasn't exactly that great. I went to an alumni reunion and actually the first person I talked to was a really nice lady who I had a class with and I enjoyed that class because I got to express myself. The problem was though is that I dislike these socially awkward situations. That's how the whole thing felt like though one big socially awkward situation. In situations like that I kind of retreat into my own thoughts especially when there are people there that I hardly know. It had some good moments but, not exactly that many. I had expectations for the event but, all and all I came out of it disappointed. It was a story of other people although I wanted people to know my story and my story was that I didn't exactly have a kinship with academia or my University to begin with. So many people feel as though they have some kind of relationship with the place they graduated from. As for me I just felt kind of a sense of nothingness. I wasn't raised in the typical growing up way I just wanted to get out of anything that had to do with school ASAP and find some work. Unfortunately for me my upbringing didn't make me the most social person or the most successful because of how turbulent it was. This experience really fell flat because I figured I went through this horrendous traffic to get there, paid for the parking, and looked forward to it. At last when I finally got there just to feel socially awkward and weird in front of people who I kind of barely knew. I think to myself sometimes that I was so responsible as a young person. I may have not had the best social skills, I didn't exactly make that many friend, and I may have not gone the extra mile that many times in my life ON THE OTHER HAND I was responsible. I did what I was told when I was younger. I finished my assignments, I came early and on time to classes, I got my work finished on time and sometimes even ahead of schedule. I was also well behaved and didn't start any trouble. That's why I have such a personal struggle and a very deep vomit inducing disgust with the adult world or as some people like to call it the "real" world. This world consists of things called jobs and this is when it gets real ugly. Most of these "jobs" that you will be accepted in when you're old enough to have one will be things that don't feed your passion and make you feel like an automaton. The other thing is nothing is more subjective than "getting a job" you're just a piece of paper either an "application" a "resume" or a "resume with a cover letter". I think it's so impersonal and dehumanizing. No where on those papers does it show your personality, the struggles you went through, the kind of life you had, and the passion and potential you poses. Nope your life is reduced to a piece of paper that is no longer than a page. The human element is completely missing from the equation as well when all the jobs need to be applied to online and you can't just walk in and talk to someone. Anyway I used to write stuff like this in a private journal. I think though that hopefully the majority of people on this website are cognitively complex enough to appreciate my musing and philosophies on life. Although I on the other hand need to understand one thing and it was actually good that I took that UCLA trail for the Peers program about making friends. I remember when I told the counselor that I had a long winded conversation with someone about philosophy and life but, then she told me that gets boring and it's unsustainable. She told me that friends are made by talking about common interests and my interests are video games, science, technology, chemistry, politics, geography, and travelling. That's a good piece of advice when I go too far down the rabbit hole with these philosophical excursions with others and in my writing. I'm more than happy for the entire world to be exposed to my writings and philosophies and to contemplate them once in a while. I think that's what the world needs more of what do you think @Anna Konstantaki?

@Yen277 Assuming you're a guy then you can expect some level of distance from everyone, even your closest friends. It is healthy to keep some part of yourself to yourself that nobody else sees or affects. It provides internal security and creates and air of mystery that is attractive. Also keep in mind that men are naturally action prone and tend to form alliances/friendships with other men who have similar interests and partake in the same activities. This gives you common ground on which to walk conversationally, keeping the topic of conversation impersonal and directed towards some practical end. Think of some of the best conversations you have had with other guys. They were probably about some shared hobby you both enjoyed. Which is why as you grow and your interests change your friendships will also change. Simply keep an eye out for others in the spaces you are entering and see if you can find something that you admire about them. You will find some common ground in there.

Try writing down(honestly) what you think is the cause of your blockages. Be impersonal in your writing. Write out your thoughts and look at them. Try to locate the fear. Observe your reaction to whatever you're writing. Follow the reactions. If they're fear-based, and most likely they are, go in them and dig deeper. Works wonders, but you gotta stick to it and be observing yourself.

Entry 100 | Reflection PHWOAR! What a beautiful number that is! So as of today, I will have consciously marked 100 days of my life. And let me add that it feels like no time at all. But simultaneously, it was so long ago since I started that I can no longer remember a time when I wasn't journaling. I'm going to have a day of two after this entry to read back all of my journal entries to myself. That was going to be my plan for today, but there are some special things I want to talk about before I forget. First of all, I followed the advice of the performance coach and visualised myself on the day of my big recital in May. Fortunately, my imagination is very vivid so I was able to feel the nerves and the anxiety filling my body in the present moment. Starting from the moment I woke up, I continued to visualise the whole day leading up to the performance. When it came to visualising the performance, I paid close attention to detail. I visualised the venue, the audience, the examiners, my band mates, my stage layout, the lighting, and, most importantly, my performance ability. Although I was nervous to some extent, it was so comfortable and effortless that I even caught myself bopping along with the music outside of my visualisation! Every note that I played was utter perfection in terms of giving it my all. After the visualisation, I became filled with so much joy as I realised that this could become a reality. A few moments later, I started a new visualisation. In this, I chatted to my future self having just performed the recital. He was beaming with energy and almost crying with happiness. I asked him how it went and he replied "That went exactly how I wanted it to go." He advised that he was "so grateful to have done that visualisation every single day leading up to the exam" but warned that he could only become a reality if I listened to his advice. For those of you thinking I have a dual personality disorder of some kind, rest assured that my creative imagination has become so developed that it takes on a life of its own. This would later prove to be the case as I was hit with divine inspiration to write some song lyrics, of all things. For years, I've wanted to write song lyrics. And now when I least expected it, inspiration struck! I stayed with the energy of the creative Muse and began to write down the lyrics to the song, which is currently 4 stanzas long. Then later on, after having recorded my first live music video on Facebook, I tuned into the creative Muse once again to figure out the accompanying guitar part to the song. As I played through the song for an hour or two, it felt so obvious that these lyrics were passing through me, not being created by me. Not often have I experienced this as it's happening. The song seems to be about the loss of a loved one. In particular, the image of my mother appeared to me several times in the practice room. But my mum is neither dying nor ill. These words are so impersonal to my own life. And yet, I can see how one day, they are going to be incredibly personal to me when the fateful day comes that my mum will die. Hopefully, there's plenty of life left in her for a lot of years. I love her very much. So those were some magic moments of my day! Now to reflect on the last 100 journal entries from memory. This journal has been one of the most fun aspects of personal development that I have come across. I've tried journaling in the past in actual books but there's something so nice about this platform that motivates me to keep going. The digital interface is nice enough for sure. But the best thing has to be the 'community' aspect of it. I've been able to reach out to like-minded people and learn about them and their way of life. Some of you have contacted me with messages of support and encouragement for my work on this journal so far. To those people, thank you very much for reaching out to me. Without knowing it, you've influenced my willpower to keep going along this journey for myself and for the benefits I will eventually bring to others. This journey of personal development has given me something wonderful: I have developed the capacity to feel unconditional love for everyone and everything. This is something very new. There were certain people in my life that I felt it necessary to avoid and hate. But that has completely transformed into its opposite. Thanks to this journal, I have been able to get my important thoughts into writing. I've had some wonderful moments of realisation at my laptop. And to top it all, I'm an absolute boss at the Dvorak keyboard now! To those of you who read this journal regularly, I will take this opportunity to thank you for taking an interest in my story. You guys certainly haven't gone unnoticed! Although this journal has never been about accumulating views, it has been heartwarming to watch that number rise each day. It validates the very reason that keeps me going: I must be doing something good! If you are a regular reader, do message me and share your stories too. I have a desire to connect with more and more people in a deep, meaningful way. None of that shallow, modern small-talk! I will return to this journal either when I have read all of my previous entries or when something noteworthy happens in my life. Until then, love you all! Pick of the day:

Well, if I look from the non-dual perspective that all is one, then relationship has to be a relationship between the one and itself at the ultimate level. So, relationships between two people are illusory, just as (presumably) all happenings within existence are illusory including the illusion of self. But perhaps the illusion exists for a reason (if the one even traffics in reason, at all). So, the potential reasons for relationship that come up in my limited human mind are 1. The one wants to know what it is like to relate to another despite it being the only one, as the one must know everything by its very nature (assuming that God is omniscient as religions have told us), and how could the one know everything if it doesn't know duality and relationship. 2. The one wants to know what it is like to know conditional love due to the fact that its nature is unconditional love. 3. The one wants to know what it is like to know imperfection due to the fact that it's nature is perfection. So, relationship gives the one the experience of separateness, otherness, imperfection, conditional love, differences, conflict, pain in opposition to the state of unconditional love and infinite well-being that is the state of entropy that our attachments keep us from falling toward. So, relationship often creates and solidifies the emotional attachment needed to stay out of the state of unconditional love and Truth that is the original state, so that the one may stay in a state of illusion to know more how it is like to be other than what it is. Full enlightenment might potentially nullify the reasons that the one wanted to experience the human perspective in the first place. Maybe enlightenment is ultimately foolish, despite that it is more expansive and is qualitatively better from the human emotional standpoint. You only have maybe 80 years to be this particular human with all its imperfections, while you have an eternity to be the one. Why do you have to be the one now and nullify all the beautiful illusions and the beautiful terrible suffering that stems from it? That is, other than the fact that you are indeed God and can do whatever the heck you want to regardless of whether or not it seems to make no sense. It's not as though there are any rules to the game that you didn't yourself create. But from the dualistic standpoint, relationship is two or more different people, places, things, or ideas that share something in common or have some form of dependence on one another. So, we could say that practically, this is what human relationships are as well. Human beings naturally and instinctually tend to create relationships with the exception of some understanding, idea, or goal that prevents a person from engaging in them. Even enlightened human beings create relationships, which is not necessary for the purpose of "getting love" as enlightenment is the realization that all is one and all is love. There is no sense of filling some place that lacks "love". Real love by its very nature is impersonal, unconditional, and non-directional. So, it has nothing to do with the emotions felt in a relationship on the dualistic level. But on the non-dual level, it is the very substance of the one and of all of existence. And the relationship is another creation of this one that is love. So, relationship as most people know it is not love, but all is love. So, relationship is also love. With this in mind, it seems that most enlightened people tend to still create relationships romantic and otherwise. Perhaps, because enlightenment is a state of non-resistance there is no reason to resist the natural urges to form bonds with others or natural urges in general. It doesn't matter in the end as it's all an illusion, but that's no reason to forego these instincts or resist them... but simply to be detached from them and see them for what they truly are. In the same way that there's no reason to forego practical things such as work. "Before enlightenment, chop wood and carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood and carry water." And at that ultimate level, relationship is truly an expression of love just as everything else is an expression of love. But it's not int he particularity of the relationshipees or in the emotions shared by the two. But it is the very substance of all things involved in the existence. It's the very dance that reality does to create the illusion of relationship that the reality and love can be found. To be continued...

This mind-body-spirit complex has had an intuition about the ego. An analogy is best used to explain what is meant. Envision an onion with many protective layers. This is you. When you are around certain people like your parents, boss, girlfriend or random stranger layers might be added. This is either to protect you from saying something you shouldnt or prevent emotional pain in other selves. Can you see a self perpetuating cycle here? It is even built into the language that this mind-body-spirit complex is using to communicate with you. Once the desire to seek for truth and reunion with intelligent infinity what is referred to as the ego can be encountered and many properties are assigned to it. However the important thing based on this mind-body-spirit complexes experience with the ego is the following: There are many layers to an onion. If you have had any experience with real onions you might know that even if the outer layers are rotten the core remains fresh. These rotten layers might be the cause for the negative properties that you have assigned to the ego. The ego can be seen as the guardian of your onion which you refer to as "you". When layers are peeled away a backlash from the ego may be experienced. This is very common for the techniques and paths that have been devised to get to a non egoic experience of consciousness. This backlash can be very severe and this mind-body-spirit complex has had some experiences with this. In later stages, experiences that you might refer to as panic attacks or existential terror can be experienced. Whenever a strong backlash is experienced there might be a very strong urge to relieve the pain. This might be through sex, masturbation, food cravings, tv, videos or anything that can act as a distraction. In a sense what you refer to as ego is trying to grasp at anything to make it stay. It might do anything to convince you to hold on to your egoic onion. However once you have let go fully "you" can experience a completely impersonal experience of reality. This mind-body-spirit complex has had success with using the Wim Hof breathing technique to help relax at times of panic attacks. Any breathing techniques, referred to as pranayama in Hinduism might be useful. Meditation is useful to cultivate self control in the prefrontal cortex and provide some insight into the workings of the mind. Entheogens help to temporarily remove several layers of the onion. However too high doses might lead to panic attacks which this mind-body-spirit complex has experienced. These are some things that have helped this mind-body-spirit complex to accelerate it's growth: Open mindedness, self control, honesty (mainly with yourself), a practical approach (if it doesn't help discard it), the ability to let things)emotions/concepts/thoughts go (if it doesn't help you throw it away), acceptance of what is, acceptance of feelings, acceptance of other selves state of development...

Don't settle for less than what you really desire. Because even if it will give you some short physical pleasure, you will have a long mental hangover, if you will go against yourself or compromise with yourself just to get laid....at any cost..... And don't listen to the advice that you have to improve some traits, etc. All you have to do is just be your REAL YOU as close as possible. And this quite often means UNLEARNING the things that contributed to the current fake version of you. If you are looking for serious relationships then do the things what you really like, enjoy life, and the girl will show up... But if you meantime, want to have active and high quality sex life, then I would like to give you additional advice. Nowadays, one of the biggest mistake of many men is that they are so horny and dumb, that they immediately show the sexual interest to the girls......and that is a really huge mistake even in places where people openly search for sexual partners........remember, there is no girl who wants to have sex with horny idiot............. if you really want to succeed in relationships with women, at first you have to show them that you have at least a little bit of intellect and that you respect women.......and that your brain, not dick, is in charge of what you speak or write........and ONLY WHEN you after a few minutes/hours/days/weeks/months (it depends on each girl, situation, etc) will notice that you GOT HER INTELLECTUALLY......many high quality doors (legs) will start to open up for you........and this is the moment when you can finally start to let loose your dick.........you can start to speak and write with it ........ and even most educated, self-confident and intellectually developed women will gladly to communicate with your dick........and enjoy all the other actions it can provide........because this is not just another impersonal intrusive dick..........this dick is special and chosen one........