Search the Community

Last night in my bed , I started contemplating nothingness. How am I nothingness? How is all of this nothingness? I asked . And slowly I was absorbed into this state. I started really to vanish and become nothingness!!. What!!. I was vanishing slowly and I reached the threshold where I am about to breakthrough. I was pushing and accepting but I couldn't. I couldn't take a breath. I was suffocating , at least that is how it felt. I couldn't push more. What really amazes me is that I have not done a lot of yoga or meditation. But how am I offered this chance to enlighten ??? I have been struggling with mental illnesses lately and taking medication. Is that related somehow ?

life is short you know..? 10.. 20..30.. 40..50.. 60 years max and bye bye 👋 Right ? Fucking NO. What if death is only something you've been brainwashed with by society..parents ..other people..religion..and even science . You might have witnessed animals dying or people dying..but is that an evidence that YOU will die ? I know this sounds like mad talk that only belongs to the nut wards ..but trust me guys I've done hundreds of hours of contemplating ..and I assure you ..there Is not one single evidence that you are going to die. But ofcourse no amount of me saying this will get it to click in your mind . You must discover it for yourself. And also nobody knows what happens after death (if its even gonna happen) that is of course if we lay aside religious stories and philosophical speculation.. Hands down: Reincarnation.. Nothingness.. Heaven and hell realms etc are nothing but beautiful beliefs. Death itself is a fucking belief.

Awakening to the facet of immortality and who you actually are Is very simple imo and can be done with simple logic. Only that which is unborn will never die . Is this clear ? Because if it dies then it wasn't eternal. It can only be eternal if it had no start in the past and therefore infinite amount of existing has already passed and it doesn't die . So ..again..only that which was unborn shall never die . Let's investigate what that "thing" is . Think about it ..What was born ? The human body ..This person that you appear to be ..this whole universe with its origin via the big bang. Etc All these were born ..so they will vanish eventually sooner or later. And What was never born? What didn't have a beginning and cannot have an end ? You should immediately see that it's Nothing . No thing . Only nothing is eternal. And therfore your true nature is nothingness. I hope the point I made is clear . If you guys have any questions or objections go ahead. Thx.

Reality is a construct, the universe is a construct. It is constructed of nothingness. So of course a thought is a construct that is what imagination is, it is the power to construct which is the power to build which is the power to create. God is a constant dream. It either dreams itself as a void, or as non apparent, or it dreams up an appearance, all with the power of thought. Where do you think the power of thought comes from? If you could with your mind think the sun out of existence you would literally be using the power of God.

I'm not denying consciousness. Please try to understand my position clearly . Consciousness exists . But what is consciousness? Its a shape shifting substance that has no ground . What's tripping you up in this inquiry is you imagine nothingness to be black void . No ..nothingness is a shape shifter that takes on endless forms but in its essence its not any particular form specifically

A beginningless thing cannot die because if it can it must've been dead since infinite time in the past . Only that which is beginningless can be endless .and that thing is nothingness aka God.

It can lead to a major panic attack or worse. I used to fear insanity a lot. Fear of the unknown or fear of death are also two big ones, but it doesn't matter as much what form the fear takes. You can even fear love. In my opinion it boils down to fear of nothingness, it's like your ego fears the void, where it is completely obvious that it is an illusion.

The foundation of reality is the absence of limits. This is not something but the lack of something. Since there are no limits, everything that can be is, therefore one could say that reality is everything, but since there are no limits, everything that is blurs in the total unlimited amplitude until it is revealed as absolute nothingness, an empty abyss. They are the two sides or perspectives of reality. It can be translated into: reality is everything. everything, given its infinitude, is illusory, therefore, it is nothing.

Like you said: something = Nothingness. You just need to recontextualize how you view physical reality (aka consciousness) to realize first-hand this Truth. I'm not saying consciousness does not exist . I'm saying consciousness is nothing.

@Someone here Yeah? Well, look at your hands. Look at the room around you. You're just ignoring what is obvious. Consciousness. Ironically, labelling actuality "Nothingness"

(I may have misunderstood you lol) We are not denying Creation, but you are not grasping the paradoxical nature of Creation which I for one, point too. The paradox is profound. Leo explains it better than I.. Something like God had to create itself before it existed. Because, even non-existence and before God was always actually a part of God. God created itself with literally nothing. God had to create itself before it existed. God Created itself. This stupid buddhist framing of "Nothing".. Yeah, thats nice but it's just a facet. Pointing to nothingness I think it important. But, when you look at your hands and the room you are in, which is this. Which is something, i guess you could say... The actual qualia and subjective experience you have is God. It's not nothing. It's God. God is a shape shifter. Compared to an object it's nothing because it has no finite qualities, except paradoxically when it does. So, you could say reality is nothing, but nothing is paradoxically something.

Thanks . Well..There is an old Buddhist saying " form is empty. Emptiness is form". It's basically pointing to the collapse of the duality between somethingness and nothingness. I've realized it many times.. That something and nothing are identical. Not on psychedelics. Just by observing my experience of reality and contrasting it against a dream state . The mistake is thinking that "nothing" is some blank black void somewhere. No.. Everything we are experiencing all the time is precisely nothing. It's completely hollow and unstable. No different than appearance of a Dream. Even scientifically speaking.. If you break down the atoms that make up the universe.. You will get waves of energy. Break down the energry and you get nothingness . We know now through quantum physics that the universe is literally made out of nothing.

Nothing changed except the thought of it. Your thought of it. Your understanding of it. Which was "false" in the same way that there can't be a unicorn that understands things. There can't be "you" which "understands" or thinks of "it" or anything at all because there aren't any "things" aside from the thought of "things." Thought can't understand thought. A thought about things can't understand another thought about things. Recursion error. Catch-22. Onto the question of "what remains?" Assuming you also let go of the story that there is "you" which can "let go of stories", then what remains can only be... Nothing. No things. Not a thing. Infinity. Nothingness. Non-definitiveness. etc.

Mahayan Buddhism talks about the 'Buddha nature' which is similar to the Self in Hinduism. Emphasis on Awareness is a common point in Theravadan/Mahayan Buddhism as well as Hinduism. Therevadan Buddhism emphasizes nothingness/emptiness because it is the ultimate ego-buster. Who wants to be nothing ? Hinduism and nondual philosophies states that one is the Self or Infinite, which are good for the ego or self-image to cling to. But nothingness is an entirely different proposition. We are coming from emptiness and going back to emptiness. Just as the vastness of space helps bring a sense of proportion and scales down the covetous human ego, similarly the philosophy of emptiness is designed to scale down the ego acting as a psychological austerity and helps to bring a sense of proportion and perspective, which enables mindfulness to blossom.

Merciful would have been to have never brought this being into life. Mercy would have been nothingness for eternity. Create no one, disturb no one. There's no such thing as a "greater good", there just is everything which includes infinite mercilessness and cruelty.

First I found god. Then I found love. Then I found nothingness. Then I found everythingness. Then I found the cosmic joke. Haven't found anything deeper than yet so far

Probably the same thing that happens during sleep . You drift gradually into unconsciousness..Then you start having nocturnal dreams . And I have a hunch that this is also what happens during physical death ..you just rest for a while and then you start a new dream of existence or a new fantasy. All worlds are nothingness . Sleep is nothing .dreams are nothing. Existence is nothing .

From a materialist perspective it would probably be something like fainting, you lose awareness of what is happening and enter a timeless and spaceless nothingness, similiar to how it was before your birth. The atoms that made "you" up slowly disintegrate and merge back into the rest of the world. From an idealist perpective with consciousness as primary it would probably also be an experience similiar to fainting. A shift into a timeless and spaceless "realm", but not because your essential subjectivity disappears, but because you are released from the frame of who you thought you were, a specific person in a specific place and a specific time. Consciousness doesn't in and of itself have these qualities when it is not being filtered through the lens of "human". So that would be something totally inconceivable, something that can't possibly be captured in human language constructs. I think we lose all sense of human identity regardless of what happens, since it is very deeply connected to identification with the body. I see no reason to think consciousness is a product of the body itself, the other way around makes more sense to me as crazy as it might sound. Nothing changes from the pov of consciousness, all the apparent change happens within the contents of consciousness.

@QVx Very true, I've done nnDMT alone and enjoyed it. I had "visual" where I saw azetc masks, impossible shapes, the world revealed itself to be a manifestation of infinite intelligence through this nnDMT induced opening of physical matter. I've sort of entered into those fractals people may know from images and videos related to nnDMT experience and skipped through some radical state channels before returning to this "human" one. It's very visual, its interesting, it's very beautiful. I have done it alone and with friends. The time with friends was in a park, by a tree while two guys played a digereedoo. That was also very insightful. I felt one with everyone there. 5meodmt has no visuals. It creates a radical state of ego death and presence. It can reveal to you infinite, truth, Goodness, God, forgiveness, perfection, solipsism, nothingness, wisdom, purpose, why the universe exists, Why love is the truth, What healing is/ deep insights into the truth of healing and wholeness, paradox, etc. One of the most profound things is you realize that You Are Self Love. You just didn't know it. It can also change the way you contemplate and reveal some profound truths about yourself and reality. 5meodmt is truly a remarkable substance. It has also made me more loving once I tripped. Soon after the trip I began speaking to a guy who was really stressed and socially isolated. My loving acceptance and simply listening healed him. Then, he became much more loose, open and social. His glow returned. So, it can heal you and those around you if you are able to integrate it. Though be warned, it can lead novices to being confused about how to integrate the state, what is means, etc. 5Meodmt is a field of mastery, and should not be taken lightly. It's a substance to work with and practice with carefully with spiritual intent over many years. It's really for people who are serious about consciousness work. I feel like, perhaps nnDMT could be more fun and novel for novices who have some psychedelic experience already. I found it more entertaining than the deep spiritual nature of 5meodmt. But, I suspect nnDMT has great spiritual potential I have not tapped into either. I am not sure. 5Meodmt can also create for me this sort of feeling of total understanding the root paradox of all things. But, I am still contemplating that. A deep goal I have with my Qigong practice is to radiate this love, acceptance, wholeness and health to others. Without 5meodmt I don't think I would have discovered Qigong.

@Schizophonia nothingness = everythingness = oneness = 1 Funny thing is that I received a 1 usd note today. Something I never owned. It must be a sign. 👀

Ive had a different experience from long ago which i consider out of body. I was doing some crown chakra meditation, long story short i ended up floating above my body and looked down on it from the ceiling and i didnt have a body, I was like "empty nothingness observer" probably awareness. I was there in the dream, me, awareness, I definitely was there, otherwise i wasnt gonna know it, but yes, my phisical body was not there, but then again, the physical body is just a bunch of sensations and visuals within awareness, just like it was in the dream. But as I say, in reality, the body is more consistent. If I looked at my hand front and back during that dream it was going to bug out, just like with lifting the cushion. Hands are very hard to create by the subconscious, its one of the ways Charlie Morley explains in his book "Dreams of Awakening" how to check if you're dreaming. You have to regularly do it in waking if you want to do it during a dream and then you will realise you're dreaming when your hand turns to elephant trunk or gets fins, or something else random when you flip it a few times. (These are examples of hands that ive had during some lucid dreams after such checks. Ive never a single time had a consistent hand during a dream) I do believe reality is spiritual rather than physical, but again, I cant say there is no difference between dream at night and this reality "dream" even tho they have similarities.

I had a dream after this post, in the dream i saw myself as a kid and saw my parents throwing unwashed clothes at the floor. They were talking a lot of rubbish unconsciously, and all i said back to them 'i am god' all the time. They ignored me and continued. Then i wondered what this screen/movie was and dettached from it, behind this screen/movie was nothingness. It was like the movie was just playing, and nobody was actually watching it.

Sprint Picture this: beautiful sunny february morning. I wake up, no energy, completely lethargic. I get up, look at the clock and it's 8 am. I do some things around the house, then I remember I have to workout. I do some stretches but it's almost like my body isn't responding to my desires, something isn't right. I can't work out. I lay back in bed. I feel horrible. And it's not laziness. I ask my intuition waddup. My intuition tells me something like this: "You can have all the answers to the universes greatest questions. But you have no questions." This saddens me. What happened to me, where am I? I just lay in my bed and I swear I heard something falling. Gravity at it again. No thoughts, no emotions, pure stillness within. I close my eyes and meditate. And as I lay there it's almost like I see the room around me, except I have my eyes closed. I am in a deep trance. I feel cut off from God. Is this what dark night of the soul feels like? Why is it happening to me again? A family member comes in. Asks me if I'm sleeping. I open my eyes and glance at her, she smiles, radiates her love at me, but I'm empty. Tells me she goes shopping. I tell her I help, she shall give me time. Quick! I need structure, what to ground into now?? I thought maybe I watch my favourite astrology show. I'm lost. No, I cannot do that, astrology makes no sense at this level... I get up and we hear the doorbell ring. Distant relative comes to visit. Is it 11 o'clock already...? I carefully observe him, without judgement. Without expectation. He yells at me that "Wow, what a mens haircut you got! You look great!" I am not able to get out any intentions from his words. It's like I'm spiritually blind. I tell him that it's a womens haircut. He asks me what I do, and I tell that I practice sports. He asks me if I go to the gym or if I jog. I tell him that neither, I practice at home. And he starts making robotic movements with his hands. "Like this?" And I sort of started joking around, making a robotic dance. "Yeah like this!", I say, and I smile. He goes on to tell me that "There was a woman twice as fat as you, and she jogs 6 kilometers every day. Now she looks like you." And he makes wavy gestures with his hands, staring at my body. In my minds eye I see an hourglass. I think that's nice, seems like a compliment. I smile. I got an idea that maybe I could go outside and jog too. Then I start to make excuses "But the psychopaths, but the mud!" "They won't harm you, just do your thing." My relative says. I ask him what weather is outside. "Sunny. And pretty chilly..." That's all I need to know. I dress up in my nicest clothes: a shirt, jogging pants and some fake Vans. And a beanie to cover this messy hair of mine that I ruined with cheap hairgel about a moment ago. I want to bring a sweater but I don't have any, all of the old ones are either too small or dirty right now. Shit... I wasn't aware of my surroundings for weeks now! What do I do now!? I get so angry, I don't know what to do. Pure chaos. I figure I'll need water. I get an old mineral water bottle and I fill it up with water. My distant family member laughs and asks what if I'm bringing water to my exercise, and laughs again. "It's ok sweetie, he doesn't know anything about sports, and you know so much!" my close family member reassures. Her words fuel the chaos even more. What!? How ignorant my relative was really! - I tell myself in my mind... How should I jog without water??? But I'll also be cold, I have no sweater. Am I forgetting something else too, maybe? "You'll be cold!" "Who cares if your clothes are dirty! Nobody will notice!" I look in the mirror. I'm very pretty. Now I can tell my distant relative disrespects me. "Yep. THIS is she." he says and laughs aggressively. I don't know what to say, because I feel in a weak position. "I can be left alone now." - I say in the end. And I leave the house. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I go outside. It's about 3 Celsius I figure. Very energizing. I'm not sure where to go, I go in one direction, but quickly change my mind because I'm sad and I want to see my lover. I think he will be so angry if he sees me dressed in a simple shirt.. then if he yells at me I will have no energy to jog. He will shame the fuck out of me. Feels like a maze. So I just run. And so I do run and run, but my backpack is annoying me. So I stop and I get my backpack off and quickly repair the issue. It was too loose. What the fuck, this really feels like an impossible maze with big and small monkeys walking around my path, and I'm an invisible monkey. I cannot see myself but everyone.. no, EVERYTHING sees me. The All There is To Be of Life. I am cornered from all directions. I cannot do anything without causing an effect! I get up, put on the backpack, the animal that I am, and I sprint again. I am blind, I am deaf and I am mute. The only thing that is real is the extreme wind blowing to the opposite direction I am going. I use it to center myself. My sprinting slowly turns into a walk. Proud monkey. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I got so far. I am now connected to All There is To Be. So instinctual. Mind empty, I don't feel anything. Reconnecting to the senses. What do I see? The sky, the trees... people again. Somebody stares at me and I clench both my fists as a sign that I want to be left alone. Sort of like that hamster from that cartoon meme. I probably look like an angry gorilla now. I kinda care. But I continue my walk. I went too far, it's time to return now because I'm getting cold. So I return and I go home. On the way home I get many stares and unpleasant reactions from people. I get asked by someone if I'm not cold by any chance. My instinct tells me to look him in the eyes and talk to him, but my conditioning tells me that talking to strangers is a bad thing. My mind is empty so I figure it's better to ignore. So I do so. He shakes his head and laughs. I sense that he isn't a bad person. I contemplate how much people care about each other. It's so beautiful. God is real.

@Elshaddai If you experience god realization you could become god and realize you are dreaming this whole life. All that exists is the void or nothingness and so you can control the dream. It is solipsism or simulation theory. You could become the Buddha. But even then you just let it all flow and don't try to change anything because you realize everything is perfect. But if you want to believe this reality exists then who knows? Maybe or maybe not. It is possible all the aliens and all the alien AIs all proved to themselves there is no free will so they all just accepted life or killed themselves or escaped into another dimension where there is free will.

This is not so much a trip report but rather a question I have regarding the idea of “nothingness”. Also, if there are grammatical errors or anything that doesn’t make sense, English is not my native language so apologies in advance. Here’s what happened: I took 75mg of armodafinil in combination with 300-450ug lsd depending on how accurately the tabs were advertised. The come-up was definitely the scariest thing I have ever experienced. Especially because I didn’t expect it to be that intense. Physical objects kept dissolving in front of me, everything around me was changing its shape, at some point I convinced myself that I was surrounded by water and about to drown. Whatever horrible situation I thought about just happened, it was very hard to see a difference between reality and hallucination at that point. I’m still in my teens so I live with my parents (who are very conservative when it comes to psychedelics) and I almost decided to wake them up and tell them that I took lsd and needed to go to the hospital because I was dying. But I had such a hard time getting up or talking that I didn’t do it. (Looking back on it, taking lsd and armodafinil was very irresponsible while my parents were in the same house and is not something I would ever do again. I also gained a lot of respect for psychedelics during this trip and I enjoy being sober like never before). So as a quick side note, if you ever choose to take (ar)modafinil and psychedelics, maybe lower the dosage a bit because it will be much stronger than the psychedelics by themselves. At least in my experience. Then finally I was able to let go and got calmer, I reached the peak, closed my eyes, started drifting off and experienced ego death. Because of the armodafinil I had this intense clarity during the experience, usually with lsd I find it quite hard to focus on things for long but this time that wasn’t a problem. When I wanted my mind to go somewhere it did so extremely fast. My imagination was clear and stable if that makes sense. During the peak I was able to verify teachings from spiritual teachers and understand things on a deeper level, not merely having a conceptual understanding of consciousness, the ego, law of attraction, non-duality, etc but actually experiencing certain insights first-hand. I realized that wherever I was, I was always at home. Everything is me. I could never be lost. At that moment it started snowing, I just spent some time looking out the window, at the Christmas decorations, the lights in the dark, the snow flakes, experiencing it all with no boundaries between me and them because what I thought was “me”, was gone. “Me” now meant something different. I experienced unconditional love for the first time, because to love is to see something as yourself (because it is in fact you). Even when I decided to think about what we could consider horrible scenarios like war, torture, I had compassion for it. I felt no aversion. I felt love. Obviously not in some sick, psychopathic way but from a perspective where what we consider good and evil was transcended and both was taken as part of myself. For the first time, I didn’t feel any need to convince anybody of anything. Regardless if I agree with somebody else's choices / opinions or not, I started to fully accept them knowing why they made these choices, why they chose to think a certain way and that it’s 100% valid and ok the way it is. Performing actions like drinking water or using the toilet were very weird (for lack of a better word) because whatever I was looking at or interacting with was me. Further into the experience, I faced childhood trauma head-on and transcended some of it, by integrating it and accepting it as part of myself. For once I didn’t run away from negative emotions or thoughts. I just embraced them. I have never felt anything like this before. So in summary, I had my first ego death experience and from that perspective was able to have some deep insights and start to address some emotional trauma. However, (and this is why I am posting this in the first place) at some point during the trip I asked myself, “well, if I’m everything (“I” not being the ego of course), then I am also nothing. Because nothing is part of everything. And at this point I am not sure if it was my mind playing games on me but basically what happened was I was shown “nothing”. And as I started to go there / allowing the experience of nothingness, a thought came up basically saying that if I chose to experience nothingness it would mean that I could never return. Because from nothingness, there is no way back. There is no way, no ego, no universe, no awareness, not even unawareness. Just nothing. So in that moment I convinced myself that if I decided to experience nothingness, the universe would just sort of collapse and everything would cease to exist. Obviously that sounds funny right now but that’s what it felt like in that moment. Later during the trip, I noticed that maybe two seemingly opposing truths can exist at the same time and that there is no way to grasp that using a “three dimensional” or linear way of thinking about it. Maybe there are certain levels of truths. It appeared to me that yes, maybe “I am everything.” is an objective truth but that “I am.” is an even deeper truth. And therefore nothingness and “something” can happen without excluding the other. It also made me think about quantum mechanics (and I do not know a lot about this topic), that prior to being observed, a quantum system is not in any particular state. It’s in a superposition state that contains all the possible states at once. So first, it just “is”. Then it “is something” (when being observed). That would explain what I said before. At base, I simply “am”. And therefore I can take on the form of nothingness (or anything else really). Again, I not referring to the ego of course. I hope this kinda made sense, obviously these thoughts and experiences can’t be translated with accuracy using language. Also, and this is important, I’m not saying that anything I experienced is true or false, accurate or not. I do not want to convince anybody of anything, I do not want to make a point or get people to agree with anything I wrote. The reason for why I made this post is because most of you had insights and experiences (induced by psychedelics or not) that I didn’t. Most of you are far beyond my level of understanding, you have connected dots that I don’t even know exist and therefore it would be very interesting to have some input about “nothingness” (basically what I wrote about before) because I simply can’t let go of it. And thank you for taking the time to read this.