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Nobody can tell you that You are in love. Only, You can know you are in love. Joy, bliss, freedom and love. These 4 compounds never leave each other, always together. I am in love, you can be too. Forget about being right or wrong, your worries, thoughts, just stay in this very moment, breath, calm down and look at around. Don't you see and feel that all is love in this very moment? It is impossible and inevitable not to feel... Life, what a chance, what a beauty, you are so lucky to read these sentences, share the love, feel the love and be the love. Thank you very much my friend, I love you, I love you. If I die, thank you for thinking about me, for these conversations, arguments. Thank you. Your very close friend James. I love you. Hit me up if you need freely any help. All is free, we are here for to help each other, we are here for each other. I love you.

@LfcCharlie4 hi . Thanks for resurrecting this thread 😁. Now that I've given it second thought you could say the point is creating whatever you want to create . No restrictions whatsoever. With baring in mind that you will reap what you sow ..so you are absolutely free to be like Hitler or Stalin but that doesn't mean there won't be consequences to your actions. These days I'm just sitting in silence doing nothing .just existing .just being .rather than doing . What are you gonna do anyways? You are eternal..there is no death that can annihilate you..so then imagine if you awakened to the fact that you are god and that you are eternal...really and this is a sincere question: what the heck are you gonna waste your eternal existence with? Joy and bliss ? That is nice but without misery and suffering there won't be any meaning to happiness. Which is exactly why this world is NOT perfect and there is a shit ton of suffering and evil and wars going on ..because God metaphorically speaking has gotten sick and tired of infinite bliss and decided to spice things up with a lil bit of drama if you will . Now That I think about it .the only point to life is life itself. Being .pure existing .basking in awareness. "Being interested In the experience of being aware " as Rupert Spira puts it .because there is literally nothing to do and nowhere to go after you've done it all . Just my thoughts Much Love brother 🙏

So, I just realized I haven't really spoken at all about my spiritual journey since my post more than 3 years ago, where I talked about my transition from Coral (Indigo) to Teal (Violet), my experiences and the shifts it had on me as a person. There is a good reason why I haven't talked at all about my spiritual journey since then, and that's because around this time is when I ended my spiritual journey. I considered myself done, and I was satisfied with where I was. Then about one year following that, another major shift happened in my subconscious, a silent, hyper-focused efficiency in all pursuits and a deeply rooted grounded-ness and peace with all that is. It's surprisingly a lot more difficult to talk about Ultraviolet from the point of Clear Light as it is about as different as any first tier stage would be from Ultraviolet. There are almost no commonalities between the two, and I'm having a hard time relating to this point in time despite not even having spent two weeks since I began transitioning to fourth tier consciousness. So, to get to the meat of it all. What and how did this come to be? Well, you see, I met this girl in school, and through her presence experienced selfless love for the first time in my life. This however was not the reason this change could take place, it was the intense emotional highs and lows that resulted from our relationship, resulting in both more pain and more happiness than I had ever experienced before in my life. This emotional rollercoaster eventually led me to face and unknowingly discard the last remaining parts of my ego. What followed was that I had unknowingly started to integrate the selfless love I felt for her, shaping my very being, allowing me to produce these feelings within and by myself. I didn't know it until it dawned on me a week later, but I had just started tapping into clear light. Looking back, that much is clear. Barriers related to feeling exhausted, physical and mental tiredness, limitations in focus all simply disappeared. While I can obviously still get physically tired like if I don't get enough sleep, since this point in time I've been immune to physical and mental tiredness in every other sense of the word. Even back in Ultraviolet, I would've never believed something like this to be possible for anyone, period. It feels like a transcendence of introversion and extroversion in many regards, as energy is no longer derived from socializing with groups of people or being by myself, but simply through being, resulting in limitless storages of energy throughout every moment of every day. This has been my reality for the past 12 days, and I've tried to test it by pushing myself to an extent that would have completely broken my past self. One such test was to study an extremely technical subject I'm working on, but for 15 hours straight, where 5 minutes of rest follows after 90 minutes of deep focus work until 15 hours have passed. I expected this to completely break me mentally, however it didn't. My focus didn't waver one bit throughout the day and I got more progress done than in the last week and a half put together. Ongoing list of immediate changes and insights from clear light when compared to any prior stages: Introversion and extroversion transcended. Energy flows freely, infinitely at every moment of every day with no effort needed to maintain it. Any and all past barriers and imagined limitations disappear completely. What's left is to witness the endless possibilities of it all, and to casually sail the waves of time. The capacity for deep uninterrupted work is supercharged to what would previously seem like an impossible degree. Sitting uninterrupted with something for x number of hours, be it 12 hours or 20 hours straight makes no difference. It's as effortless during the first hour as it is during the last. The beingness that happens at this stage makes past limitations, self-imposed or otherwise vanish as if they were never there to begin with. Physical capacity is greatly enhanced and too feels effortless when compared to what could be achieved before and what back then would have pushed the body to the breaking point now becomes an effortless dance between mind and matter. An outlook on what is with a profound sense of childlike wonder. Everything becomes magical and interesting, as if opening ones eyes for the first time. Extremely high levels of compassion, warmth and care for everything and everyone around me. Moodiness transcended. Permanent sense of bliss, wonder and unbound potential. Complete disconnect between past and present. No reference points to look back on, even from prior stages like Ultraviolet. There can't be any "after" as all limitations and dualities break apart at this point. It's very appropriately set as the final stage, as there can't be any after, when there is nothing more left for there to be an "after" of. I will probably keep adding to this post as I experience more, and I will date my updates accordingly. I've only "been" at what I perceive to be clear light for 5 days now (while the transition lasted 7 days), and which most definitely has to be a 4th tier stage due to how radically different it is from any prior stage or tier. It's been difficult for me to post about this sooner, as I've been having great difficulty grounding myself in reality following this realization. My body has very much been lagging behind so to say, but it's getting better by the day. 2024-11-21 16:58 GMT More about me. While I've been "on the path" very actively for the better part of 11 years, I've never taken psychedelics, so I've never gotten to experience glimpses of higher states of consciousness, only to drop down again right afterwards. Every time my consciousness has shifted, that new stage has quickly become the new baseline.

I want to remind people that fear is pretty much the main "barrier" when it comes to the expansion of consciousness. Any negative definition you have of Enlightenment isn't a definition of Enlightenment. Any negative definition you have of a more expanded state of consciousness, isn't a definition of a more expanded state of consciousness. Negative energy is constrictive, positive energy is expansive. Sometimes people can associate the high negative fear based states that happen in the process of expanding, as the expansion, it's part of the expansion but it isn't the end result. The expansion will usually bring out the negativity/fear within you because that is what prevents the expansion of your consciousness. Once you let go of the fear/negativity that the expansion revealed, you will experience the benefits and ecstasies of that expansion. Psychedelics can bring you into states of insanity by expanding your consciousness way too rapidly than you were in a sense prepared to face and thus can bring out immense fear. Once you let go of the negativity/fear you will experience that expansion of consciousness positively, with ecstasy, and the other aspects of your true nature such as joy, love, bliss, passion, etc. You don't necessarily need the psychedelics to bring out your fears/negativity but it's a good tool you can use, just be very careful. I don't recommend starting out with psychedelics, I recommend gaining a good understanding on how to let go of fear and making yourself very stable before you consider potent psychedelics.

@Breakingthewall The absolute level is eternal, even if you aren't conscious of it it's still ever present. It's a matter of how conscious you are of any particular aspect of consciousness. I'm suggesting you can become more conscious of any absolute level of consciousness as well as any relative level. Everything already exits now, but you can allow yourself to experience more of what exists with no limit. Enlightenment from my perspective is becoming conscious of and experiencing many of the absolute and relative aspects of consciousness, usually Enlightenment is focusing on the aspects of your true nature, joy, love, bliss, passion, excitement, ecstasy, omniscience, various aspects of non-duality etc. but there is no limit on how high you can go. So it is absolute, unchanging, and eternal, however, you can become more and more conscious of it. And thus, there are higher levels of consciousness forever. Any aspect of consciousness you can imagine, the absolute or relative, you can progress in that direction forever, including when it comes to Enlightenment, God, Infinity, etc.

@Leo Gura Ok , so here is the information. I questioned myself earlier -What are all the ways I am wrong ? I wrote all these in my diary. - That everyone is happy except me -Those who are in a relationship are in a state of bliss - That I cannot overcome adversity in the future -That being present has no practical application -That more effort produces better outcomes -That I am not fooling myself -That I am completely honest -That no improvement is possible in the present condition So these are the things that I came up with when I contemplated the above question . And finally I want to ask you about the power of Intention in improving anything in life ?

@Ishanga @creativepursuit I didn´t know about the casual body but apparently is the same as the Bliss body or 5 sheath

Yes true, its less likely to to bad actions when one is in Bliss, when Your happy then everything looks brighter, purer, and more real, the opposite is true when Your suffering, so to be highly Conscious means Your more intouch with Truth and Reality, and hence more Blissful..

In how I understand things, there is no such a thing as 'forever'. People usually assume this Reality is all there is, but only because we haven´t seen more Realities that does not mean they haven´t exist in the past or that they won't exist. But is true there are rules in this Reality, there is an end to 'this one', this particular dream is happening on Planet earth, and so on. If you ask me, I personally would love to stay in the anandamaya kosha for a long time before dissolving completely. In the Bliss body there is still a very subtle sense of existing, even if there is no body or mind anymore, there is still is very light sense of existing, so is not completely death. So I can imagine after a lot of time staying there the Consciousness would completely let go from that too and then what I call 'going back completely home' would happen. From that, I honestly have no idea. Since time does not exist there I guess it doesn't matter if 8 o 8000 thousands years or a million years pass. At one point probably something new would happen (or not?). I would never say forever. I only am focused on this one existence or dream. There is a finish line for this one. Of course the relative you does not reincarnate. That is gone but that Is the illusion I think we agree on that. Because is not another experience. Is the same. You just change clothing. The reality is behind all experiences but the Reality has volition or tendencies to maintain a certain experience, right? Why you still have a body? Clearly something is going on there, there is a preference in You (the Reality) to maintain a certain configuration if not you would suddenly would become 'everything'. Yet you are not being Barack Obama now, don´t you? There is a difference in mentally knowing that you are behind all experiences and LITERALLY being behind all experiences. To literally being behind all experiences you 100% need to lose the body and absolutely everything that you consider 'you' that is limited. There is no other way. Clearly you as Reality are now being in a certain way, regardless what intellectually you tell yourself.

the causal body has stored karma in it, that encapsulates the bliss body and so called Soul or Atman (you allotted Life aspect within You), this is all that goes with You, so its an evolutionary process. Why this is the way it is I do not Know nor have I heard or read of any explanation, I only guess that Absolute contains all Potential and Possibility, via an Aspect of Oneness/Completeness, so therefore we have to exist somewhere, duality has to exist somewhere, Consciousness has to exist and be experienced/expressed somewhere, I think that somewhere is here...so we play out this game of duality, karma, Consciousness, Free Will, Embodiment, etc so Absolute can experience itself, as well its an expression of a certain Potential in Existence..

@Shane Hanlon Your post implies you’re making a pretty big distinction between transcendence and integration. You can’t transcend without integrating, I see the two as being almost synonymous. You said there is more to integration than just letting go of fear. You were talking about including so I was explaining integration from the context of letting go of the vibration of separation. If there is no illusion of separation then you are all inclusive within yourself and reality as a whole. If you are talking about integration from the perspective of becoming more in alignment with the energies of your true nature; joy, love, bliss, passion, ecstasy, etc. then yes, of course there’s more to it than just letting go of fear. You made it seem like you were speaking about integration from the context of it being something separate from other aspects of the spiritual process because you contrasted it with transcendence, god, and enlightenment.

You are consciousness. If you need an anchor point to understand consciousness, just bring yourself back to the understanding that I am consciousness. Consciousness and experience is the same thing. If you weren’t conscious there would be no experience. Consciousness itself is fundamental, it’s just that there are more expanded states of consciousness and less expanded states of consciousness. Joy, love, bliss, passion, excitement, ecstasy, and other positive states are expansive states. In expanded states you are more receptive to gaining higher level and more holistic understandings of life, which can lead to profound benefits. Perception is pretty much just another way of saying consciousness. People use these kinds of words to describe different things. Using different words might allow someone to better explain certain aspects of consciousness.

This is relatively easy to answer, but before I do that, realize we are using language and logic to discuss topics that are not logical or conceptual or make much sense, as soon as I describe it then it become that which it is not, so its a paradox in a way when using language and logic as we are doing here to talking about anti logical aspects of reality.. Where am I? I am Absolute, Absolute is everything,but I am just a bubble of Absolute in Embodied Individualized form, like an Ocean Drop, it came from the Ocean but now it is just a drop of it, but its a Hologram of the Ocean, its the same thing, but only a drop of it, in India they call this (what I/You/all of Us) Atman, or Soul, but not the same meaning as what most ppl think of the word Soul, there are no "Individual Souls", there is just One Big Soul, we just have a drop of it, Embodied within Us, its non physical of course, You can't find it in Your Body.. There are 5 sheaths covering this "Soul" that makes up basically what We all are, Human Beings, Food Sheath, Mental Sheath, Energy Sheath, Astral Sheath, Bliss Sheath, Karma is the Glue that binds it all together. We are none of this, we are the Soul, which is Absolute but its Individualized.. I think this happens so Absolute can Experience itself in Trillions of ways, its an Expression of the Potential and Possibility that is the essence of what Absolute Is!

I did 30 minutes last night and 30 minutes this morning so I am behind 3 hours. Last night I felt bored out of my mind during meditation but this morning I was feeling good like I could keep going for a long time but it was time to get ready for work. This morning I didn't do much mantra meditation. I contemplated what truth was and why I thought my head existed separate from the sensations I have of it now. I felt into my physical sensations and emotions a lot. On Saturday I will see if I can catch up on the time I lost during the week. Hopefully it can be like the meditation I had this morning and I can just sit in bliss for 5-6 hours

@Carl-Richard Well I have to admit I did not really think about it much on a everyday level. Thx for making me reflect on it. There is definitely sth re the transfer of states. Contact high - yes, I experienced it to some degree on festivals or even in clubs with friends that consumed psychedelics. I just never experiences it that strong as with Shakipat. In short - I agree. Breakingthewall often talks about "openness" and I simply like that term. I did and still do integrate this more and more in my life. Indeed I was much more skeptical about - let's call it non-material phenomena - than I am now. But at the same time, I was open enough for Shaktipat to experience a profound effect on me even back then. I don't sense this state as you do. Body language, eyes, tone, breath does not give me this impression. I do see value in his points, though. Yeah..I just don't know. He just does not seem genuinely happy to me. He said in the other video that he does not want to be a teacher and in his seminar he gave that that exact impression of "I DO NOT WANT TO BE HERE, I DO NOT CARE, I KNOW BETTER THAN YOU AND IN GENERAL, THIS HERE SUCKS". Of course, that is my impression but similar impressions were also shared by other participants. On the one hand - yes. I understand and agree. On the other hand - then what is this big fuss about enlightenment about? As a result of my participating in this forum, I personally really start to dislike this cult about enlightenment as a state. So I am enlightened, but I am not warm re other people, I live in an unhealthy way, I still get sick, I am insecure, I still have to deal with everyday problems like everybody else - so what is this all about? So I can feel "bliss"? Honestly, I haven't met anyone that I would consider someone being in constant bliss. The most developed people I met were meditation teachers. But they did not seem to be "in constant bliss" - simply calm, empathic, healthy lifestyle and in peace with themselves, their role and their actions. Is this bliss? For me, it's not. Bliss for me is a little bit more. It's not only accepting but embracing ("loving") everything that is. A inner state that is there almost completely independent of matter what happens in the external world (I say almost, because death of loved ones or severe physical injury to me definitely would impact me even in this moments). I remember momentary states and periods in which I consider myself in "bliss". For example: No 1 - during and after long meditation retreats (10 days). No. 2: Psychedelics, e.g. Peyote and Ayahuasca, sometimes even weed. No 3. Falling in love with my partner. I remember these states, and I believe I can sense them quite well in other people, too. And I believe can sense when other people are not in this state as well. Haven't met anyone (yet) that has been in this "enlightened, blissfull state" over an extended period of time no matter what they say... And about enlightenment... Yes, 100 people in this forum probably use 101 different concepts of enlightenment, and yes there a phases and stages, and so on and so on. For me, 90% of these discussions amount to nothing but more mental masturbation. I heard, seen and read it enlightenment bla bla so many times from so many people while at the same time sensing their arrogance, their insecurities and their inauthenticity. Lot's of cheap talk about some mystic state, some strange ideas and propaganda from self-proclaimed gurus and their sheep-like followers who regurgitate the same meaningless phrases and concepts. Meaningless, because talk alone is cheap. What I propose instead? Let's not talk about "enlightenment", let's talk about action. Let's not talk about some abstract conceptualized states, but concrete, subjective experiences and in particular actions. I like the quote "Strictly speaking, there are no enlightenment people, there is only enlightened action" (from Inner Worlds, outer Worlds I believe). Let's assume you are "enlightened" - so then what? Life will put you - if you want it or not - into situations where you have to make decisions and take actions. Let's say "enlightened action" is actions aligned with the Dao / Dharma whatever that may be in this situation. You take "enlightened" actions, you get into this state while executing this action. You don't take "enlightened" actions - you loose that state. But the "state" IS the action, the action is the state. I don't think there is a state independent from your actions. You don't reach enlightenment and then "puff" you stay in this. No - instead your actions determine your state and not vice versa BS like "I am enlightened, I understand, I am in bliss, etc etc." and then you simply remain in this. So what matters in the end is what you do and nothing else. Sorry, but fuck your alleged enlightenment, your alleged state or your alleged bliss. I can't see that, I can't relate to that, only things that matters to me is what you do and how you do it. Don't talk, show it to me with your behavior, show me with your whole being. For me, the whole thing about "enlightenment" is similar to the idea of "Chitta" in the Yoga Sutra. We cannot directly observe it, but we can observe the actions of it. Let's focus on actions with "enlightenment", too.

Yes agreed, pain levels and such are relative and what makes ppl gain pleasure is different, but real Happiness is different from this, natural Happiness is just natural, its more intense and lasting... We all feel these things, that is not different, all ppl experience happiness, sadness, anger, joy, excitement and tons of other sorts of emotions and feelings, Bliss is not this either, its more deep and centered and just a Realization.. Someone torturing another is and getting off on it is not happiness, plus its deranged, we are not talking about the deranged but normal, avg everyday ppl that populate and make up the majority, not the extremes of everything. Ppl going thru ups and downs emotionally are not living life, Joy and bliss are the foundation for more of life to come into their experience, its not the goal but the path that allows more Potential to open up within them... I've had ups and downs, and I've seen tons of ppl that live this way, it sucks imo...

I was watching some NDE video's recently, most all the ppl say they did not want to come back from what/where ever they were or what was happening in their Experience.. One guy with 4 kids whom he was very devoted too, said while he was having his NDE he didn't care about his 4 kids and wanted to stay in that experience of great Bliss, Love and Oneness... I think what happens here is all about Choice and Free Will combined with one's Consciousness/Awareness level, we are all capable of what the Great Sages/Mystics have Experienced, but we have Karma to deal with and Desire too, so in the end its up to each of Us to choose what to do and how to BE within themselves, this sets up the foundation for no more birth/death/rebirth cycles to continue and to get out of this place that is at times not so healthy or great!

Very interesting coincidence you mention Jan and Shaktipat. In late 2019 - I just had finished my first meditation retreat and came back from living and working 1year+ in India and Nepal - a friend told me about it. Jan was giving a two day seminar in London including Shakitpat. He said "seeing where you are right now, this might be the right thing for you". I was very skeptic, but also very curios. I trusted my friend, so I thought "why not give it a look"? I went there. I did not like Jan at all. He was super boring, pessimistic, defensive, depressed, moody, the complete opposite of being inspiring. I thought about leaving early but stayed for the Shaktipat transmission. Other participants said sth like "yeah he is like that but we are here for the Shaktipat". Well, it seems you have to take the good with the bad... After a while the participants - including me - were getting the Shaktipat. Shortly after, there was a lunch break and I went into a small cafe with another participant to eat. We talked about the Shakipat, asking ourselves if we feel something. We kind of felt something, we talked about it....and the next thing that got us out of our conversation was the waitress telling us that it's early evening and that the cafe now closes! How is that possible, we just sat down moments ago for lunch? We talked for hours and we did not notice that time passed. It was crazy. Be both could not really describe what exactly was going on. We felt different and the Shaktipat definitely did sth to us. We both felt the same. If I had to describe it, then I would say it was like being high on very clean, very sharp MDMA but without the visuals. A very functional state of consciousness, being "high" without really noticing being high. I completely forgot about this experience until now. Looking back at it now, I can take some conclusions from it: Either Shakitpat is real - or they were serving us psychedelics in the cafe Assuming the first, you can - at least temporarily - transfer states of consciousness from one person to the next one. How fucking crazy is that? I could not really contextualize this experience 5 years ago. Today it seems even more strange to me. Your guru, or teacher can be a really shitty person and still have something real about him. Indian philosophy is coined by the idea that your teacher must live the teaching, that he should embody the principles in daily life (see e.g.: Heinrich Zimmer: Philosophies of India). I personally experienced that the complete opposite can be true as well. What an irony that the video above is in the context of "positive" life interview (LOL) as Jan is the most depressing teacher I ever met re any spiritual teaching. But who knows, maybe he just had a bad phase... Shakipat alone does not really seem to change much in the long run. Many participants were already there for the second, third, fourth time. Can be a piece in the puzzle, but not more than that. Beyond the experience at the cafe I did not notice any changes in my state of consciousness or my life in general. Who knows, effects might be subconscious but I never felt like doing another Shakipat again. "Bliss" and Enlightenment" seem very arbitrary. In the video above, Jan says he feels bliss right now. I don't get the feeling he does. Same way he did not seem to be in bliss when I saw him. Admittedly, only once for two days many years ago. But my impression re this is very constant.

It's a breath of fresh air to see this attitude. What greater good is there than to care more about the peace and enlightenment of the whole? There is none. It's the ultimate life purpose. I care more that the world find peace than I find it. I'd give my life in service to that cause. This "it's all an illusion" talk can be transcended. Why do you think we're here? What will you do when you reach that high peak? Come back and chop wood carry water? Ah yes... you will finally be at peace at last. You will have fulfilled your curiosity and you will know how to remain calm. YOU will be nice and cozy chopping your wood. Peaceful people sit in ignorant bliss while the world withers. For the strong, the state of reality serves as fuel. The problem is it takes much development to care more about reality than oneself. Weakness pervades. Most so-called spiritual people care more about their own comfort than anything else and they'll use any story they can to preserve their cushiony homeostasis. The work begins by solving the problems of recruitment/mobilization, securing capital, and coordination. It can be done but there would need to be a leader to hold it all together. Where's @Leo Gura?

Good morning… I woke up thinking about dancing… so I think I’ll begin here. So… I was thinking if I am going all on in with a romantic partnership… I’d like to share my passion of dance. I love to dance and I used to instruct but there are some dances that I don’t know as much as others… and they’re really calling to me and more improvisation. So I’d like to see if we have a conversation of what we’re wanting out of our relationship I have many ideas to talk about but for now in the Journal I will say I want to introduce dancing as part of a way to increase our partnering, sensuality, and fun. I have two dances in mind that I’m hoping he might find as something he would like to learn and share with me…. Argentine Tango and West Coast Swing. I have a dancing buddy who owns a studio close to the location I am now, but I feel like we’ll be closer to where my romantic interest lives which is three hours away. From his location it’s almost four hour drive to my buddy’s studio. So I messaged my buddy to see if he has any recommendations of top notch instructors in the Louisville area… it’ll only be an hour away. I just sent the message and haven’t heard back but my buddy dances competitions and travels a lot to areas so I’m hoping his network would include some great dancers in this specific area. He hosts traveling instructors at his studio and I enjoy watching his posts. He specifically hosts West Coast events… so I asked him about this, but I’ll add the A. tango when we chat. So I looked up Tango studios and it looks like there’s a few options in that city… but I also ran into a video of a couple from Buenos Aires who is offering a dance event in Argentina for 13 days… it’s from April through May but this wouldn’t be a good time for us since his hostel would be opening up at this time. But that has definitely been at the top of my list of locations to go. I want to dance the tango everywhere in Buenos Aires… I think I’ve mentioned this before but I fantasize everyone dancing in the restaurants and the streets all over the city… I’d love to go and do this. I used to drink Malbec and I mention that if I ever get to Argentina… I feel like I’d be much more open to drinking alcohol just to have Malbec from where it originates. I don’t know if I’d be interested in drinking when I get there… but I could entertain the idea of possibly. But I’d love to dance where I travel. Anyway… I would love to introduce him to the magic that dance can bring into our lives. I figured we’d start off with taking beginner classes together. I might have a lot of dance experience and instruction experience, but I don’t necessarily want to start our dance relationship in a teacher/ student dynamic. I’d much rather be a student/student dynamic and possibly why I’m interested in learning dances I don’t know as much. I’d like it to be like date nights. As a teacher I kind of know how it goes when one of the partners are in the teacher mode and yes… I want to set us up for success and enjoyment. To be honest I don’t know if he knows how to dance already… I could see it… he’s very musically inclined and most musicians that I’ve met have a tendency to be able to pick up dancing easier… and he looks like he’s athletic as well… so I think he might pick up fairly quickly but I don’t know if he’d have the desire to learn with me or not. But it is something I’m going to suggest. West Coast is danced to a variety of music… it’s a smooth improvisation and moments of playfulness throughout. Sometimes it can get sensual but not always. I guess I do want to mention that I did see blues swing dance as well which I’ve dropped into classes a few times and I enjoy. But I remember when I was talking to him about his singing… he said his voice is fitting for blues and jazz which he really doesn’t listen to and wished he could mature his singing to fit other genres. I know I enjoy listening to his music and of course I don’t know any of the artists or the songs… which is quite normal for me… hehe… but I’m so glad I don’t know them because he’s going to be introducing me to a whole new range of music which excites me. Also… if this is improvisation dancing… it’s good to have the lead have a better understanding of the musicality while I can just follow his lead. Ideally both would know but that’s not necessary… my body will hear the music and do it’s thing anyway.. hehe… but I want to focus on my partnership development. I feel like I might be a little slower getting into the down and dirty intimacy… who knows.. but if so… I definitely would like to demonstrate my energy while I’m dancing…because… I know its attractive and can be quite powerful for my partners… I just get so damn excited… and when I let loose it’s so fucking fun! That’s what I want to show him which I might not be able to demonstrate outside of this setting. I’m going to work my way here… but it does seem like I’m a bit stiff right now…hehe… And it’s just because I haven’t had people to really play with… no I’m not going to blame anyone else… I just have been focused on my spiritual work and sometimes I’m bit more on the strict side with myself. since my transition I’ve gone off the deep end of strictness and was like fuck… it’s time to relax and enjoy now… and I do to some extent but I can do this more and it’s become more obvious how stiff I am compared to him especially. Argentine Tango is a very passionate and sensual dance… I absolutely adore this dance and want to have more opportunities to learn. We taught this style of dance but yes it felt like it had too much structure to this free flowing dance… I mean structure is necessary when beginning to gain confidence and learn how to communicate with partner.. but with this dance it’s for lovers to explore this style of nonverbal communications… how to speak with our bodies and I’m so excited to hear what he has to say… and I’ve got some things to tell him too… hehe… yes I’d love to see if he’s interested. Of course I find that this would be great for us to do together and build a bond through… however I am looking down the road for him too. I’d love for him to have more tools in his belt to enjoy himself whenever and wherever he is. He travels to different cities and countries… so possibly if I introduce him to something he didn’t realize he would enjoy… He can find dancing while he moves with the flow of life. The dance community usually isn’t a stingy group… we love to dance with our romantic partner yes, but we also love to dance with everyone! And I have a feeling he’d absolutely love this as well. So I want to be very intentional with him. I’m not wanting to make any excuses or have fear to stop me from expressing what I’m looking for in a committed partnership… if we choose that we want to move in this direction then I’m not going to hold back.. this is something I want to share with him. And I’m definitely interested and open to activities he wants to introduce to me as well. He enjoys caving and I was introduced to this through his hostel and i loved it and could definitely see myself doing it more. I was hoping to have trips with him but I found myself in other groups and we’ll have plenty of time to find opportunities to share trips together. I’m hoping he’s a taking his time caver…hehe… we’ll see when it happens. But he seems so fascinating… and who knows what he has up his sleeve… I’d love to hear what he thinks is something that can build a bond together… maybe there’s a secret desire to learn something with a romantic partner that he hasn’t tried yet… for some reason I feel like he probably hasn’t hesitated to try things out romantically but who knows until we have a conversation. We might have a brief time to say hello this Thursday and maybe Tuesday… he’ll be traveling and so this won’t be the time to talk to him… but I’m still trying to give him space from his separation. I’ve been trying to flirt but in a very subtle and minimal manner right now. Again I have that shit going on that I’m going to be too much or too intense… but I have a volume button and right now it’s on low… and intuitively this is the right move right now. Honestly I need this time as well for myself… I have been clearing out romantic energy of past energies myself. I’ve been doing this for awhile now.. and have been successful except I can feel a bit of lingering going on with the Aussie man. I feel like he too will have some remaining from this nest mate. I think if we’re honest about this… it will help us not feel bad if there’s a lingering that exists, but I hope our chemistry can spark us to inspire us to have a desire to get to know one another where we can clear those past energies in a short period of time. I do need to know what he’s looking for in a relationship. If he’s wanting to not have anything serious or just wants a fling… then I don’t think we’ll be able to move into a romantic connection. I want to attract someone who is on a similar page. I’m not looking for a fling and I’m hoping if I go into this fully then we’ll be building a relationship for our lives. People might think this is pretty extreme but it’s where I am. I’m not saying I want to get married right now.. but I’m saying… I’m looking to build a bond for life and as life flows we’ll work and dance with it together. Again… I’d love it to be romantic, but I feel like we’ll be amazing friends and business partners… so our relationship for life doesn’t have to be specific in one area compared to another… but flexible to change while we grow… and not having to plan everything out from the start but be as open and authentic to see where our relationship leads. So yeah I’m looking forward to talking with him, but I’m patient to see when we’ll actually get a chance to engage fully and privately… hehe… until then I know I have more own energy to clear to set up a better start to our journey together. So… I finished the drafts for the communities from the intention convention event last weekend. I’ve been wanting to get into this and finally I’ve gotten there. I don’t think I’ve said much about the convention except for the moment of bliss drumming around the fire. So how to begin? Ok… so there were eight definitive communities represented. We had guests who are involved with other communities but weren’t really representing the same information as the eight communities.. most of them were founders, shareholders, and board members… they have a bit more skin into the community i guess. My romantic interest asked me if I’d like to be the meetings note taker… I thought about it and said that yes… I can give that a try… I’m curious to hear what everyone has to say and what everyone wants to talk about…. I know I have my ideas of where it can lead… but if I’m a note taker then I won’t talk much and mostly just listen. I hadn’t really had much experience in this except for the owner at the temple who would have me type out her words for different communications she had. So I guess I started to have a little bit of experience. But anyway… I keep saying how intuitive he is… he might not realize this but for some reason his suggestions for me seems to benefit me highly and I’m so appreciative of this. Hehe… it was intense trying to keep up with the conversations. He got two of us to be note takers and we both were focused at trying to get as many words down that we could. We now realize for next time that having a mic and amp would be very beneficial. Sometimes it was hard to hear people, plus we want to sync a transcribing program for ease. However, this was very beneficial for me to take these notes. I was using my iPad along with my portable keyboard… so I’m sitting there clacking away on the keys trying to keep up… We had long meeting sessions… so both sessions my iPad died on me… hehe… we were in the middle of the woods in a Greek theater setting… it’s beautiful actually but I didn’t have any extra battery bank with me… I mean I do but I don’t have the cord to charge my iPad… hehe… any way once my iPad dies I’d move to hand written notes… the first session I didn’t realize how many words would be spoken and I only got a fraction. But I only brought three pieces of paper thinking I’ll just type everything out. Well.. I filled those pages and couldn’t get all of it down but there wasn’t much before we broke for lunch. The same thing happened during the second session except I had enough paper with me to continue recording until the end of the session. The problem that I had was I was using loose paper… it wasn’t in a notebook and I didn’t number the pages either… so when I was putting the information on the paper onto the iPad… it wasn’t in order… hehe… but it didn’t actually stop me from how I approached the information I wanted to deliver. So… i guess I didn’t really understand what was expected from me and the other note taker… I think she was a bit more familiar in doing this… she was talking about taking minutes and is very detailed oriented on formal procedures… hehe… ummm… ok… yeah that isn’t really what I was thinking of doing. But we were supposed to work together.. and I wasn’t sure how other than posting my information that I had typed out… it wasn’t in order all the way but she created a shared document and she was hand writing the entire time so it was going to take her time to enter her data in. She’s a full time student and is trying to launch her first issue for a magazine she’s trying to publish. So yes formality and grammar and editing skills is right up her alley… and it’s funny that she gets partnered with me who is not good with any of these areas… lol… but she was very stressed out about the note and the time of submission. I admit that I had that feeling at first as well… I don’t know if any of you read a few submissions back when I got back.. but after that session I was able to relax because I was the only one pressuring myself to get things out for the community members… hehe… and so I was trying my best to let her know that she doesn’t need to be frantic that nobody is breathing down our necks except us doing it to ourselves. She said she’s been busy in many ways in her life and I said to not worry… do your things… I get the vibe from the people involved are just appreciative of how we were wanting to help… and they’ll be happy with whatever we share with them. We had another girl who did end up creating an audio recording… so she’s going to continue her formal submission which is going to take her a few weeks to finish up with her schedule and just the tedious nature of this style of record keeping. I’m not sure how our relationship is going really… she is hostel fam… so she’s involved with the hostel and is close to the founder. She is in fact the other lady he sandwiched himself between and the whole opportunity for me to touch his hand… hehe.. i was the timid side he was dealing with while she was the comfortable side and the whole massaging of the head and everything.. so yes no issues of demonstrating affection… hehe. But I met her for the first time at the caving event. She was one of the guides and so she’s an avid caver as well.. and I like she’s a bit more on the professional side of things.. so yeah I recognize a bit of stiffness like I see in myself.. but I’m thinking it’s more on the distrusting some… I guess I feel like specifically she doesn’t know if she can trust me. I could definitely be projecting but I did feel this so I was keeping space and allow reality to have us engage whenever that time happens to be. I might have a bit of projection going on but not fully… to me I can explain it in the way she started her note taking.. hehe… she had everyone’s name listed and she had these elaborate and flowering words to describe everyone present. Even to the ones who were wanting to get more information about intentional communities and weren’t directly involved in sustaining a community…anyways when I got down to my name the only words she had for me is “note taker”… lol… so yeah she wasn’t really interested in anything I was sharing during the event. But granted I didn’t know she was on her way of publishing a magazine either… but I feel like I overheard a little conversation in regards to this but it seems like she wasn’t sure if she should let the group know what she wants to do… or maybe waiting for the appropriate time to let us know… I’m not sure but I didn’t think too much about it because if I’m to know I’ll get that chance to let it unfold in the appropriate timing for myself. So really… I feel like there’s a weird girl jealousy thing going on between us I think… I’m not use to dealing with this much anymore… not that I haven’t danced this dance before… but yeah… I think that’s why she has a distrust in me… of course I don’t know but this is my Journal so this is a great space to purge my thoughts regardless of how accurate it is… I want to get her out of my thoughts.. hehe… not that I don’t want her out of my thoughts completely because I told her that I have more information beyond the words spoken at the meeting because I have ideas I want to present with possibly brainstorming for solutions to network everyone for the coming year. She was trying to understand what I was doing with my notes… oh yeah… I didn’t even get to what I was doing with my notes… hehe.. tangents. So yes she was going to focus on the formal side… and I wanted to focus on how does this information help us understand what was said…. So in my opinion the first thing to do to help with clarity is to separate the communities and have a general summary of what the community shared with us. So I’d start with one community and I’d copy and paste all the members words of that community together so I can use their words to summarize their information. So this is what I was saying I didn’t need to have everything organized in order to do this. In fact many speak like me where answers weren’t given during a specific questions but was spread throughout the entire time of their speaking. Similar to myself I might have heard the questions but it wasn’t until later did I realize my answer so yeah… I found reading through their words a bit more scrambled around… helped me actually get their summary out by deciphering my crazy notes… hehe… a few times I’m like what the hell did I type and what’s being said… I didn’t run into many situations like that but it was fun. So yes if we have a summary we don’t have to read down through the entire conversation of the meeting to find an answer. I think I did a fair job summarizing their information together. What I really enjoyed when I was taking their notes were the words people were saying… it makes me giggle just thinking about it. Our character and personality I was trying to keep as I was summarizing… so yeah for me formal recording wasn’t what I enjoyed… I felt like this was a family meeting and so to remember everyone’s character I loved keeping their quirkiness… it’s absolutely adorable. I found myself laughing out loud when I was trying to get their message out… when I submitted my drafts to the specific communities to review and edit for accuracy… I got a few laughs back… they laughed that I used the actual words they were saying… I said I don’t mind what was said as long as it’s authentic… we’re family so I don’t think anyone will get offended… I mean this was how we were talking anyway… of course I have some of my language in the mix since i was editing their information… so I wanted to make sure they were happy with what I had to represent them. I also know there are areas such as the financials that went over my head… hehe… words I’ve heard before but not really any understanding in the context and so I wanted them to better explain what I couldn’t do for them. Plus there were a few communities who didn’t say much during the meetings… so I wanted to give them another opportunity to share more… it’s possible it was overwhelming to be in such a large group and finding a chance to express yourself… the founder was giving people the opportunity, but again didn’t mean they were confident and comfortable expressing… maybe now they’re back in their space they can find the words without any pressure on them. Yes… I’ve been loving the opportunity to gain rapport with the individual communities as well.. I didn’t know how I would approach all of this… but during the meeting we are taking about networking.. so I was going to see how comfortable people are by sharing conversations through online messages. I’d like to start to get to know who I’m working with as well… I know how group chats going with each community… I’ve sent out the drafts and I”m waiting to have them returned their edited version. So yes… the fellow note taker wanted to understand what I was doing so I was able to let her know and she has access to my summaries in the shared document so I figured she would understand what I was doing. And she did say that it seems like this is not a requirement for me to do, but I told her it’s something I want to do. I’ll get to know the communities there a little better with this summary… because it was fairly chaotic trying to keep up with the words…hehe. And the founder also told both of us that he didn’t expect us to do these extras… he thought he was going to receive our chicken scratches and submit them for people to decipher for themselves… but he’s appreciative of our initiative mannerism we both share. I told her I’m enjoying myself and since I’ve done this I’m starting to find connections between them which is what I’m more concerned with. So I told her that I’m not a good editor…for my second project I’ll type it out and she can go back and edit it if she wants to. But I told her she seems like she’s got her hands full with the transcribing already which will take a few weeks… that it’s not necessary. She wanted to edit the summaries I wrote but I told her that I’d like the communities to do the editing. I saw a few of her edits and yeah it was missing the character of the person speaking. I guess it was too formal for me… and honestly I don’t want her to make my content so formal either… I want my character to come out as well.. and my heart and my passion… this is part of my passion project and I’m super grateful to have this opportunity right now. I’ll get into this.. well.. if you’ve been following along for the past six months I don’t have to continue repeating myself of my desire to help communities and connect a network of communities globally… but there’s some lingering baggage when it comes to her specifically so let me get this out for a little bit… so the girl jealousy thing is what I’m wanting to address… so of course I don’t know anyone’s relationship to one another. Before I move on I want to continue to warn people this is a space for me to purge my thoughts.. she is not a bad person.. in fact if she’s been introduced into my life right now I’m excited to see how our relationship develops. So keep that in mind… I find it fascinating how relationships evolve and I ultimately have hope for us to bond eventually… but I”m pretty patient to see that… I’d hope within this year things can completely change but if it takes five years from now… then I’m fine with that too.. I don’t want to have to prove myself and I don’t expect her to prove herself either… I just want to get my initial baggage out so I can open my mind to find a different perspective… which I’ve already been noticing and I want to share but I start from the chaos before clarity… hence my title… its a beautiful chaos and I appreciate this process… so ok… why do I think there’s a girl jealousy thing going on? So I met her at the caving event… I knew I went there to specifically get an opportunity to talk to the founder but I noticed how needy people are of his attention and so I laid back during the weekend and thought possibly we’d have a chance during the few days after I planned to volunteer… so yes I could see he wanting his attention… and she wasn’t completely needy… she has a relationship that’s been developing so he’s more willing to give her attention. but I wasn’t sure if I saw her desire for a possible romantic attention… I’m not sure why I think this.. but I think that’s what i was getting the vibe originally of why she was wondering why I was at the event… maybe she was wondering if I was there because of a romantic interest too… so possibly why she didn’t care to get to know me… which in turn I reciprocated. Again I was observing her and I liked how informative she was when she was getting everyone ready to cave… she went to the same cave as I did however there were two groups and I was in the meditative while she was guiding the adventurous one. we had an incident during the caving the third group in this same area had a girl who got a cut on her leg which was more like a puncture wound and needed to go to the hospital. She wasn’t present when the founder brought her back to take her but when she returned with her group we informed her. It was again interesting to see her reaction. I definitely would describe it as professional yes, but also filled with worry and concern and even anxiety of making the correct steps forward at this point. She was the only staff member at the location now… she’s the leader and she knew she wanted to make the correct decisions which makes sense. We were all tryin got help her get to the results we got too… I feel like I was reminding everyone that it’s not a life a death situation… not using these words of course.. but the one of the girls I was with who helped the founder get the girl inside the car and had a staff member join them to watch her in the car while they went to the hospital… she was a bit frantic as well… when I saw the mannerism of the founder with the injured lady… at first I got up and wondered the degree of severity it was… he was quite calm and had it under control… she’s got a minor injury that needs to be looked at. So I didn’t react… in fact I allowed the people who jumped into help and I continued with my conversations. So the frantic one addressed the note taker partner…and again I can see how she wanted the energies to elevate to degrees which isn’t necessary… to help the frantic one I asked her how close is the hospital and it was like 10 minutes away… she thought it was going to be hours away and thought there was going to be such a huge blood loss etc etc… once she saw that it was right down the road she felt better.. and so again when they were both together she couldn’t help herself wanting to elevate the energy but I felt like I was able to keep it calm and stable for the leader to understand that it wasn’t a life or death emergency. She wasn’t sure again who to trust at that moment but she kept her cool and started to focus on the logistics… she was the only staff and there was a group who didn’t have a staff guide. She questioned if she should go and get them… she feared that they shouldn’t be alone… I reminded her that it’s more of the advanced group… there were many experienced cavers there who are confident in their skills and should be fine for them to get back out when they’re ready. Many confirmed the people present in their group and she recognized some of the descriptions and finally she said ok… she doesn’t need to get them. But then she started to look around to the vehicles… the founder’s truck is here and he will not be returning to get it back… so we’ll need to return it to the hostel. She wondered if all the vehicles present part of our group. I said yes every car came with us… again a question whether to trust me… and so I got out my iPad’s footage and said I recorded everyone arriving because many of us are first timers so there was electricity in the air… so ok… all of the cars are there… one car was missing so how many additional cars do we need. This is when she decided that she’s going to stay back while the two groups who are finished can return to the hostel… sh’ell drive the truck back and any person who needs to ride with her. Good solution and again good observation. we really didn’t have any more interaction that stands out in my mind… we just move to this weekend event and the first memory is the founder talking to her and asking if she remembers me… and she looked up and said oh yeah I remember her and we both just shared a simple smile… hehe… not grand affection for one another and again I will reciprocate… and I completely understand. But yeah… I see there is an affection between them but I also don’t sense a romantic chemistry or spark there either… polyamory being so present gets me wondering who is partnering with who…lol.. like it’s my business… and actually that’s not what I’m asking myself.. I’m asking who is he partners with… but I did see her celebrating a ten year anniversary with her partner on FB and so that’s was cute to see… and yeah I’m not sure why there was a thing for a second… I’ll see how it unfolds… ok.. I feel good leaving that behind so let’s move into the insights I’m getting from the note taking. Since I’ve been involved with the temple farm in Utah I’ve already been brainstorming ideas of what suggestions I’d have for that particular property but again it always leads back on how to scale it to other properties and eventually globally… and again with me not talking at the event and taking notes I found it interesting to hear commonalities and differences in each approach. At the end of the meetings I had a brief moment with the founder to ask how he thought it went and of course he said it went well but he can see things he wants to change for next time. The setup had people arriving Friday afternoon or Saturday morning… the meetings were scheduled longer with both during Saturday before and after lunch.. people will leave at leisure on Sunday. He thought splitting it up through out the weekend would be best… four shorter sessions one on Friday and Sunday and two on Saturday.. I’m sure there were more details he thought of but that’s all that was said at the time. I agreed because I felt we only got to know communities and we really didn’t get to any action steps of solutions for areas of concern. And I think that’s what’s going on right now while I’m deciphering these notes. I guess there’s something I want to address real quick before the details is that at the end of the session there was a collective agreement for the properties wanting to create a blueprint of the function of a community… talking about an outside mediator.. and who would be interested visiting properties to find network opportunities… inside I wanted to say that that’s exactly what I’d be interested in, but I didn’t want to commit to only these properties… so I waited to see who would volunteer or be interested… and there was someone who said she’d be interested… and it was very interesting to see how everyone responded to wanting to support her to do this. She already travels between many communities… I believe she has seven on her list for next season already… and only one was present during this event… so is she saying she’s going to add another seven? I spoke to her one on one… because of course I’d love to support her as well and I wanted to see how she was thinking of approaching this… i love her passion and enthusiasm towards problem solving solutions for her communities.. and I can relate a lot to her.. I found myself reminding her that self care is important if she wants to do this. Ok… I just got done eating a spaghetti lunch with my pops… I feel better using him as a soundboard at this time because it’s not so much spiritual stuff like Aya and deep shit… it’s language he can understand again if he’s not really passionate about but there’s more feedback from him…hehe… and by talking I knew I was missing something… I didn’t know what but I think I figured something out… I want to help these communities and right now I’d like them to focus on self care of course but they’re really wanting a body of intentional volunteers… I was seeing where my nonprofit comes into play.. I’ve got high standards of the communities I’m involved with… right at this time I have communities I adore but all but one are places I would recommend to friends and family to freely go to without my presence… I know it sounds a bit…whatever the word is… but I’ve got high standards and I want my recommendations to be valued because of intentional results… just as an example… I love the temple farm but with the personality that runs this space and there rules… i don’ know much of my friends and families who would enjoy themselves alone, but if i was there to put things into perspective it would be a different situation… same thing applies to the shamans that I work with… a few months ago someone was wanting me to write a FB review on their retreat and I said I wasn’t able to do this because I don't think they’re recommendable at this time. Not that I’m not going to continue me work with everyone… but once they’re ready then I’ll recommend them… but if they’re not there yet… then whomever is attracted to work with them without my recommendations is how it’s supposed to go since that’s what’s happening. I want to build skills to enhance my understanding of what I’d like to do for WithinUverse nonprofit and I was thinking I was going to be recommending these particular communities… but I don’t really know these communities right now… and so I don’t know where there standards are…. But what I could see WithinUverse backing up right now that can help these communities… finding volunteers who are intentional and desire to contribute… I can see creating a program to find these volunteers… I’ve met volunteers I would put on the list already… and possibly it’s going to be a recommendation program… not everyone can go on to the site and sign up with their details… somebody has to recommend them to join… and this tool can also be used as a reference for volunteers to find opportunities. So yes I see I can put my focus in this area at this time. Everyone want to know how to get volunteers to actually work.. and there’s a concern they’re just looking for a free place to live so they’re not homeless… and I would consider myself as a work trader and I can see how these could be a perception to look at but that’s going to limit volunteer opportunity because of the lack of trust. Now the people I know doesn’t mean they’re all completely perfect volunteers… we have our pros and cons; however… they’re intentional to grow and learn and connect… so I’d recommend them to be volunteers for these communities… even though I’m not sure I’m recommending the communities until I actually have time to understand where they are. Another factor that seems to be in the way is that these communities don’t always have housing for these volunteers… so this will need to be addressed. WithinUverse would love to have a collection of intentional volunteers and to start a system to start gathering these people I find will be very beneficial. Interesting… it’s going to be nice to narrow down my focus right now… so where do I start? Hehe So… what are programs that are already out there that seem like it’s the same thing or similar? Let me do a search real quick… right now I’m thinking workaway, woofing, couchsurfing…. Things of this nature and I also remember LDS has a website dedicated to finding volunteer opportunities… but there’s more out there I’m sure… lets see what I can find… so actually I think I’ll finish this session here so I can do some research… sweet… until next time… enjoy!

Of course. The self is a cloud. Without self, sky is beatiful, pure, bliss and empty. It is the Life. You have to walk the path brother. Knowing will not help you.

Ignorance is bliss @James123Go meditate. Lol

The Karmic substance is what goes on, certain tendencies and conditionings, 5 shealths theory again, your food body and mental body do not go on, the energy/etheric and Bliss body go on, Karma is stored in the energy body, it goes with Atman, via your spiritual/consciousness level at physical death, you either consciously or unconsciously choose another Body... There is Sanchita Karma, this is the total Karmic Substance of all Your Incarnations, then there is Prarabdha Karma which is the alloted Karma for this incarnation, the Enlightenment process is to first eliminate or burn of the Praabdha Karma then the Sanchita karma, once that is done, no more incarnations, no more individuality, no more birth/death/rebirth for You, You merge with Absolute and its over... No Karma, no form is possible, no physical existence in any form is possible, cause and effect cycles are incased in every physical form, only Humans can be conscious of this process and be either below or above it..that is the point of our existence, to explore this Possibility and Potential so Absolute can experience itself...

For me enlightenment is when the form disappears and what there is is a total openness to being. Being is absolute, it only flows in one direction, the direction of existing, and it is total. It's like an absolute brilliance that totally bursts forth. What becomes obvious is that what veils our perception of ourselves is what is perceived as negative, but from an absolute perspective, the negative is also positive because it exists. There is only one category: existence. then your being opens completely and what you are outside of time manifests, since it is the same as you, me, a rat or a stone. There is only existence, and it is total, and you are that. That's it, game over. I think you could call it totally bliss.

There's much more than 2 meditations, plus meditation is not a proper word to use, someone sitting with eyes closed, you think they are meditating, but they are sleeping, it doesn't reflect what we need to understand.. We want to be Meditative, or at Ease wtihin ourselves, that is we are naturally Accepting what is, Responding to what is, Living Now naturally, this Ease is no stress environment, the stress response is stopped, and You have great Clarity of Reality, You see what is as it is, no judgement, egoic involvement or wants/needs flitering Your Perception.. You just see the Reality, via this You feel Bliss within, so Bliss is a path and by product of Enlightenment, to get Bliss, start from where You are at, get Peaceful of Your Own nature, watching breath will not get You there by itself, its too basic, that will just in ways calm you down, You want Peace as a Natural Experience, no matter what is going on, heart beat lowers, less sleep needed, and more at Ease, then from there naturally You will rise up to Blissful states as Natural occurence. Try Isha Kyria, a simple 12 min practice, then move up the ladder to Inner Engineering and Shambhavi Maha Mudra practice which is 21 min,,