Sophophile

How to balance material desires with spiritual growth, I find myself in a position where there is a conflict between these two. I have desire for fame, power and a lot of different kinds of experiences that in the material world so to speak. But at the same time there is this feeling that this contradicts with my higher vison and growth. For example building charisma, focusing on frame control and trying to be famous in one aspect of my life and trying to change the persona to get there feels contradictory in nature to meditating everyday, contemplating about deep stuff and trying to see things clearly. It feels like I have to give up one for the other. This is really confusing. It would be great to know your thoughts on this matter. ✨

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I got disillusioned about the social game and have zero motivation to do something or be someone. I am able to see everything and everyone is relative - all different identities, lifestyles, culture, beliefs, etc. And I think now there is no way to go back to where I was - chasing some identity or goals. I just can't stick with anything because I can see that it is another bubble of illusion. I have been trying my best to take an identity or go in to a certain field in life, but it just doesn't work and I have been dealing with so much confusion. Sometimes when I just walk through the city or engage in some social activities, I become super conscious of everything that I can see clearly through the social construction at play. It is really cool and mysterious to feel that way, like seeing things from a third person perspective. But the issue is I don't know what to do with my life and I am completely feeling lost with no purpose. I am sharing this so that if anyone can relate to this please share how you have dealt with this. Share some books or methods you found effective at this point in life - I have tried different books and ways, but all of them felt shallow and not had much impact. I am 23 years old and I know I have a lot of potential in different fields, but I don't know - this realisation and seeing things clearly stops me from pursuing something and putting in hardwork because of the relativity of everything and meaningless from an absolute sense.

@Leo Gura Physical stability is mental stability. I experienced the same insight, but only partially, in brief glimpses and fragments. And it just destabilizes everyday life and feeling of sanity and meaning. I felt completely confused and got lost with out knowing how and where to ground myself. This is amazing. This is worth a 2 or 3 hour video. ✨👍

What are the best practices for getting a sweet and deep voice for public speaking. @Leo Gura what helped you to improve your voice ? In your older videos the sound was different relative to how it sounds now which is really impressive.

I am 23. Is it late to start learning singing / guitar ? Not have any kind of prior experience, just a desire to express the emotions through music.

If you grasped this, why are you teachings and speaking. There is no point if you really grasped this. Or are you just my imagination and not real. Did I invent and imagined you. WTF🤯

Accepting the Universe philosophy, Stoicism, Self Improvement https://youtu.be/gesDAxlbVcU?feature=shared

@Leo Gura Please read the personal message. I have been messaging you for the last 3 days. (Sorry for interrupting here again.)

@Leo Gura Please consider the personal message I sent.

@Leo Gura Sorry to interrupt here, but could you please check the personal message I sent you ?

Sure. Lately I have been slowing down and being patient and more compassionate with this work and that really helps. ❤️

At those times I feel lonely and nihilistic. I was hard on myself but not now, In the past I used to judge and feel guilty, but now I have been accepting things with compassion and patience. I posted this since this pattern is happening for again and again so that I don't know whether I have to change something or is there a different perspectives that I can take on this and so some work. Thank you

@Wilhelm44 A lot of things about my character. At some times by consistently doing consciousness work(meditation, contemplation, observation and mindfulness practices) I can get to an amazing state of mind where I can have profound insights about different things and I am at my best in all aspects of my life (relationship, academics, mental clarity, etc.). At this state just sitting and being conscious of reality and of my own existence feels like absolute bliss, I can connect with the mystical nature and beauty and intelligence of everything around me and there will be lot of creative ideas and insights passing through my mind. And just when things starts to go in this way I try to sabotage myself, eventhough I appreciate and greatful for this development that I had, I just unconsciously force myself to not continue further in that way. Maybe it's the fear of losing the familiar self or fear of that positive change, I don't know. I jus spent time unconsciously using phone and try to diminish mindfulness, it feels agitating and confusing when meditating and I just make things worse in a couple of days and then again I get back in the cycle. 😑

For the last 1 year I have been trying to bring about positive changes and I have been having a lot of backlashes whenever I get to a point where I can see real changes. I have watched Leo's video on Ego backlash and it helped a lot to understand how the homeostasis work and why it is there. I would like to learn more deeply about ego backlash and go through it and make the changes stick, because it has been 100s of times I have been pulled down by ego backlash eventhough I tried to stay mindful and accept it. I can really feel an unconscious part trying to get back to the familiar conditioned behaviours and actions by fighting against the conscious intention that I have. Can you guys share similer experiences. It will be really helpful if you can share high quality books(Psychology, Personal development, spirituality) or other resources related to this to understand more deeply and to make practical change. Thank you❤️