Max_V

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About Max_V

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  • Birthday 12/27/1999

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    Netherlands
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  1. The only way I have found to pull people out of places like that (including myself), is genuinely trying to find something that they're passionate about so that their life has a purpose, not even per se in the LP sense. You said he really enjoys guitar right? Perhaps exploring that deeper with him will give him the boost to start fixing other things.
  2. My condolences, awful this has happened.
  3. If it doesn't hinder the rest of your day in terms of productivity I don't see it as a problem. Don't have to min-max everything. But if you do wanna change it, one hack that could work is placing your alarm on the other side of the room so when you wake up you have to physically leave bed in order to turn it off. The only fight then is to put on some clothes instead of going back to bed.
  4. @Shin In my opinion what happened in season 8 should have been layed out with better detail and pace over 2 or more seasons. So many complex things just got forgotten or got one simple unbecoming resolution, those writers really did the whole thing dirty.
  5. @Shin How they tied up the white walkers was one of the most disappointing things for me. All this buildup just for one character to get a knife in the back, none of the complexity explored. So sad.
  6. As someone that has social anxiety and is scared to talk to women, I’d be very interested to hear about your perspective. What is it like to have guys be afraid of you?
  7. I think trying to have the the mindset of reading as much books as possible without sacrificing quality in reading experience and comprehension is a good way to go about it. Don't make it a soulless rat-race. Try to enjoy the process as opposed to reading for the sake of having read something.
  8. That could be it yeah. But I do feel like my social inadequacy caused by my social anxiety and feeling so different together with my imperfect appearance make for me feeling worthless. But you're right, I don't know how I would feel if I were to have a girlfriend and friends around me who validate me as a person, perhaps then my doubts about my appearance would vanish. But then again, I would be held hostage by their love. If they leave I feel ugly and worthless again. Perhaps there are ways for me to make new connections. But why I can't practice socializing very well is because of this strong irrational (my reason knows it to be fallacious) feeling gripping me that I'm the most worthless and awful thing in existence and to even have people see me would be insulting to them. That's how deep it goes.
  9. @vizual Ayyy, at least I'm not alone in that regard
  10. Yes, been doing this every day for a while now. It's hard to unravel that though, feels like i'm a surgeon poking at my own brain. I know it is futile, yet my rules of who I should be are in place. I hate myself, but I can't change that, because I recognize the reasons why to be truthful and right. Have been going to therapy since I was about 15, am 21 now. That system hasn't worked for me very well I should do more of this, good suggestion.
  11. I write, although not enough. Trying to decide at the moment if I want to make it my life's work. Thank you for that suggestion, it clicked for me, will write about my face. You might be right. Perhaps while growing up culture sabotaged my sense of Beauty. The rules I now judge it by indeed cause suffering. I don't know how to rid myself of them though, they feel really important to my survival.
  12. I always have had this ideal version of who I should be in my mind that I constantly compare myself to. If I feel like I don't live up to those expectations I feel immense hatred for myself. I know it's a pathological and neurotic, but being as I am now feels unacceptable. It feels awful, like I am worthless and shouldn't exist. I want to start feeling grounded in myself without being victim to the whims of the opinions of others. It feels like my body should be an accurate representation of how my soul is like, a signature if you will, having that not align feels absurd. ---- And finally, why should I love myself if I feel there is ample reason for me not to?
  13. I have been feeling this abject contempt for myself lately. The way that I look, my submissive and anxious behaviour, the way I can't express myself well and have trouble with social skills. Lately I've been feeling this ever-intensifying, complete opposite of self-love and I don't know how to deal with it. I feel like this is 10+ years of stored pain growing up and not feeling at place in the world coming to the surface. Everyone's opinions once grounded me, now realising they are not absolute, how I should feel about myself is without root. It seems really simple concerning appearance. Just accept what you have is always the go to advice. But for some reason I have always had this obsession with beauty and elegance and can't let it go. Seeing my face in the mirror stirs disgust. It feels so absurd not to match physically the conception I have of how I feel my soul looks like. Making friends and introducing myself to potential romatic partners feels impossible. If I hate myself this deeply, why would someone else love me? The loneliness and seperation I feel is so intense. Just here to have some conversation about this. Letting it out makes me feel less alone
  14. Closing this due to low-quality posting. If you want a good thread you gotta have more than just a title.