I have become conscious of LOVE to such as high degree that it was more terrifying that any horror movie that you have ever seen.
That's LOVE. No human comprehends what LOVE is. If you fully saw it you'd be so traumatized you would get mental breakdown.
This ain't some hippie Buddhist love bullshit. This is actual LOVE.

My experience with organics is limited. Mushrooms definitely feel more "alive", more multi-dimensional than just a single chemical. Mushrooms have a certain lively, creature-like quality to them which I do not get so much on other chems. I actually miss it. 5-MeO is amazing but it doesn't have that trickster, creature quality.

Psychopathy is a physical brain disorder. They are literally missing the part of the brain necessary to feel empathy.
Logic will not fix that.
You could perhaps convince them, however, to act nice for their own benefit, to stay out of prison. 1/3rd of prison inmates are clinical psychopaths.

DMT is much, much more visual.
5-MEO barely alters your sense of vision. It's visually mild while DMT is visual crack.
5-MEO is more ego-dissolving.
5-MEO has high load-body. Can be quite uncomfortable at first.

Hitler didn't invent that. He himself was radicalized with anti-Jew propaganda while living homeless on the streets in his youth. He was a megaphone for the scapegoaty ideology of his era. He was like a teen who hangs out on 4chan all day, then gets elected to office.

The ultimate truth is that all judgment and criticism is pure delusion and ignorance.
Criticizing anything in reality is idiotic because reality is Absolute Love. It cannot be anything better nor can it be different.
The only reason anyone criticizes anything is because their perceptive is too small.

One option is to have phases in your life where you sleep around, and phases where you are in serious relationships. This seems more realistic for many people.

It depends on how good your day game locations are.
It's all about location, location, location.
Good day game locations are pretty rare. But in some cities they are amazing.

When I was young and considering whether I should get a philosophy PhD, I read this book and it helped me understand whether it was right or not for me:
https://amzn.to/42uGcf0
You can find more such books which explain the PhD graduate school life/process to you. These books are essential to read before taking the leap.
When I read that book I realized that I would never find truth in graduate school. So I dropped it.
Remember, for pretty much any path you want to pursue in life, someone else has already pursued it and written a book about it. So do your research before you make such a big decision.

25+ rounds.
Have not tried DMPS yet.

Take the best insights and lessons from everyone. No need to chose a favorite. You will learn important bits from everyone.
I learned valuable tidbits from everyone I ever met in game. Even from psychopaths, rapists, criminals, creepers, alcoholics. It's all grist for the learning mill. You learn from the good, the bad, the ugly. From success and from failure alike.

That's why hardcore players don't settle down, they just sleep around and date casually.
Not saying that's right, but that is one lifestyle option.
Yes, there is an inherent tradeoff between relationship and freedom/variety.

Austin, Texas… especially if you’re a neurodivergent weirdo.

It's like apples and coconuts.
Most mentally ill people are not geniuses, they are homeless drug addicts living on the streets mumbling to themselves.
The truly insane are locked up in a padded room. They don't produce anything.

Just seems unnecessary and even insulting. Rogan and Lex make tons of money. They don't need Musk to directly pay them. That would make them feel corrupt. The corruption is far more powerful when they don't even realize it's happening.
The more scary thing to consider here is how easily elites makes friends and how totally blind they are to the corruption that their "innocent" friendships promote. This is the very heart of how society is corrupted: it's just rich, powerful, and famous people all getting super friendly with each other, and in so doing screwing over everyone else without even an ounce of self-awareness. They are so blind to it that it's terrifying when you realize that this is how all elites function.
They are literally doing the corruption live on TV while complaining about how society is ruined by elite corruption. The lack of self-awareness is staggering.

I can’t believe this…

OF COURSE!
Two egos that massive are like two magnets of the same pole.
Musk is a fool for thinking Trump will listen to him or do his bidding. Trump is like Putin. Oligarchs serve him, not the other way around. Because he can arrest them. American oligarchs are so foolish they don't even understand how this works. They are used to presidents being fair and decent.

They were fawning over him from day one.
Rogan and Lex are easily fooled with fame. Because their entire careers are built on it. They fawn over the famous, confusing it with truth, not questioning them seriously. They don't understand how to really question reality nor do they care because their careers go much easier without that. Questioning power is a very different business from their line of work. Their work is to befriend power.

After 10 years of making videos I did get sick of it. Which is why I took a lot of time off lately.
It's important to take breaks and vacations from it. Heavy thinking needs to be balanced out with non-thinking activity likes games or travel or listening to music or mindless socializing.
I do procrastinate on contemplation for certain videos because it's heavy exhausting work. I have to be in the mood for it.
But as far as general contemplation goes, not for videos, I do that nonstop through the day.
It sounds like maybe you have some brain-fog or maybe just a baseline weak mind. I don't know. Or you're just being too hard on yourself or you need more training and practice.
I've been through periods where my brain wasn't functioning well for health reasons. So I can relate to that. But otherwise I get juicy insights all the time and I don't have a problem articulating things.
We all have our strengths and weaknesses. Try to play into your strengths.

The irony is that low consciousness people do find value in devilry, like Trump's fake TV show.
But many of Trump's schemes were just theft and value-stealing. So Trump and Musk are not alike in that regard. Musk does legit business. Trump is a con-artist with a TV show.

I did make that shift.
Just because some of you guys get depressed by some of the diifficult truths I share doesn't mean I am being violent in my communication or beating you over the head.
Truth will always be painful to many of you. I can't help that. I just go deeper and deeper in my understanding of reality and mankind. As that happens I learn more and more ugly things which many of you are not gonna like hearing.
My understanding is counter to all the New Age spiritual fantasies that is the bog-standard in this field. You're not going to get happy spiritual New Age stuff from me.
The direction of the teachings is to cut through all fantasy and understand the mind and mankind at ever deeper levels.
There are things I haven't even shared because you guys would find it too demoralizing. So I am not just mindlessly truth-bombing you.

Yes. My mercury dropped a lot especially.
Although you have to remember that urine tests do not tell you how much heavy metal is stored in your body. It only tells you how much you pushed out.
But the biggest indicator is how much better I feel. It basically saved my life and my mind. I was starting to have neurological problems from the heavy metals and it was quite bad.

I take many supplements for various reasons.

@kieranperez Glad to see it's helping you
Keep doing research into your issue and you'll discover even more solutions. Tons of solutions exist to discover for any life problem.
For example, for ADHD, heavy metal urine testing is critical. You need to make sure your organs are not full of mercury, lead, etc. Those seriously distrupt normal cognitive function and will make your life really difficult.

Is this a real problem or a natural state of the mind for some people?
I think that there is a scale like introvertion extrovertion 
In this case it would be
Longer attention span and shorter attention span
 
most of the people are in the middle of the scale with some tendency to longer attention span or shorter.
And there are few people who are closer to the edges.
Both of the edges have pros and cons but it looks like society (or medical industry) is too focused on the people with lower attention span (since they were children at school) because it's harder to make them obedient in class (both the hyperactive and not hyperactive types) and the medical industry see this as an opportunity to invent a problem and sell for them a solution (drugs like ritalin)
 
Maybe short attention span branded like a problem because it has no use in school, work, and modern structures and the idea what a human should be like (although it has it's own advantages that society find not usful and maybe as a threat).
I personally think that's insane, it's like being introvert and the doctor diagnose you with a disorder because you aren't extrovert (which isn't very far from the true.. but I'll give more example).
 
 
Or it's like your dominant hand is left and you are diagnosed with disorder because most of the people are right handed.
 
So I think it's the same. 
 
I always get creepy vibes when I hear about Adhd/add and my intuition tells me that something is very wrong with the way people precive it and treat it.
 
But those are my personal opinions.
 
I would like to hear from people who diagnosed with ADHD or ADD by the doctor or people who wasn't diagnosed officially but found the ADHD/ADD symptoms in themselves, what do you think about this disorder and did you ever question it? How this disorder affect your life now? How it affected your life before the diagnostic?