Emotional Mastery: What do you do when you don't feel good?

[Davino]

There are days you feel good and there are days you don't feel that good.

In life, there are days when you feel better than others. This is The Law of Life. We'll get everything.

There are days you know why you feel bad and others that you don't know why. Nevertheless, you feel the way you do, despite understanding it or not.

There are days you know why you feel good, and others that you don't know why you feel good.

 

What do you do when you feel bad? 

This may seem a trivial question, but it's not. All logic and mind masturbation flies out of the window when you feel down.

So do you feel aversion to feeling bad and do things to change your state into a more desirable one?

Should you just go through it mindfully? Feeling and letting it be the way it is?

Should one get beyond like and dislike? Establishing oneself in equanimity?

Should one enjoy the contrast of life? Accepting the nature of being human in a full embrace and love for existence?

 

Be mindful of answering from a happy state. Most of those answers don't correlate with other states. You may think they do but they don't when you are in them, you see clearly and you are humbled. If certain conditions are not met your life philosophy just doesn't fly, that's a hard pill to swallow but is nevertheless the case.

 

 

[Chrisd]

I look at puppy video

[Sincerity]

I usually linger in that state unconsciously for some time. I might feel resistance towards even escaping it. It sucks me in and I can be enjoying it a bit in a twisted way, even though I'm suffering.

But then at some point I become conscious that I've been possessed again by some shit energy. I look at it and recall that it's not me and that it doesn't have to be this way. I "look at it" simply by feeling the energy consciously in my mind. If needed I will recall the memory when I felt that energy the strongest and focus my light of awareness on it. Additionally taking a walk usually helps me sort things out and talking to a voice recorder on my phone is great. I often combine the two (just did that an hour ago haha). I tell the truth about what's bugging me, I cry, I try to reach the essence of the feeling and feel into it. Then I'm freed and I can have some peace.

For me, a great question to ask myself is "what is the truth about my feelings", i.e. how am I feeling, what's the problem. Usually the answer arises very fast. Then I feel it to its fullest, I cry, etc.

Good question!

[Osaid]

Self-inquiry. Simply question what you are experiencing. Questioning what you desire is a very good way to get to the root of your emotions, because there is no difference between emotions and desire.

What do you desire to avoid? What do you desire to have? Why does it feel bad to desire that thing? Is my desire fulfilled or unfulfilled? How can I work on my desire?

Edited January 30 by Osaid

[Lila9]

I don't know if it's healthy or not but when I feel emotionally bad I retreat and "abandon" reality. This including my job, interaction with people and responsibilities, which I turn my back to. I hardly can move either because when I feel emotionally weak, my body feels weak too. I turn into a snail mode and focus on self soothing, do things like crying, writing, wondering, listening to music or lying until I feel better and can return to my life.

[Ajay0]

 It is said that high prana levels automatically translate to feeling good about oneself, good health as well as being naturally mindful effortlessly. Prana is natural life-energy which is known as chi in chinese and ki in japanese.

If I am feeling bad, that would mean my prana levels are low. So I would try to raise them by meditation, exposing myself to mild morning sunlight (solar prana), walking barefoot (soil prana) , being in open high wind areas (wind prana) , taking bath in natural ponds and lakes and sea (water prana), sitting under old trees and receiving their prana.

There are many ways to gain prana, and these are some of them. These can increase prana levels and uplift the mood.

The beach is said to be a source of high prana levels, so going to the beach is a good way to feel good in short span of time.

Edited January 31 by Ajay0

[hyruga]

There are many emotions to deal with. There's fear, anxiety, anger etc which may be dealt with in a different way.

One book one can read is Emotional intelligence by Daniel Goleman. Another way is just learn to be appreciative of your life. 

[Yimpa]

I was feeling like poo this afternoon, but it turns out that my body and mind was just asking for a nap. I allowed myself to take that rest instead of forcing myself to be “productive”. It turns out that allowing this is itself productive; I felt better after taking a break.

[mmKay]

Grilled cheese sandwich is my comfort food 

Edited January 31 by mmKay

[Princess Arabia]

I just change my thoughts, Only time that doesn't go too well is if I'm already doing something that doesn't make me feel too good, so I just bear it. But if I'm just sitting there or thinking about something that doesn't feel good, I change the way I see it and move to another Reality in my mind. That's where it originated, that's where it ends.

[Ishanga]

I've come to a point where things outside of me don't bother me as much, traffic still bothers me but it only lasts a second or so, otherwise maybe due to age I've learned to accept what is much better now.. 

Its not that we have many "emotions" to deal with, or situations, it is just that deep down there is a lack of acceptance towards what is, and a lack of responding to what is vs reacting. I for one do not want to feel negative emotions, fear, shame, frustration, sadness, depression, anxiety, I've felt these and much rather feel Joy, Bliss, Excitement, Intensity of experience, Vitality and so forth. We have Free Will, we need to decide what we want for ourselves, if one wants to feel sadness, depression, anxiety, then that is up to them, but the more positive emotions are more healthy for us, that is proven, the more wellbeing You have, the more access to your potential and capability You have, so that is the choice... 

[Ulax]

Meditation and IFS.

[meta_male]

I often feel bad, but when I feel extra bad then I scream, kick or punch something, insanely repeating "it's all fine :)" in my head.

If I'm aware I'm feeling bad then I'm doing IFS, visit the part I'm feeling the most intense and try to find out what it's trying to tell me.

[Boost]

You already speak quite intellectually, so I will say that: grab your initial intent, and boost it. 💥

[sholomar]

The open focus technique from the book Open Focus Brain helped me most here. We tend to use narrow objective focus to bury and distract ourselves from negative emotions. Adjusting attention style to cultivate an alpha brainwave state helps purge those emotions and make me aware of when my emotions are fueled from thought stories since thoughts and emotions feed off each other.

[Jac067]

On 31/01/2024 at 1:37 AM, Sincerity said:

 

For me, a great question to ask myself is

"what is the truth about my feelings", i.e. how am I feeling, what's the problem.

Usually the answer arises very fast. Then I feel it to its fullest, I cry, etc.

Good question!

Thank you. Good question to ask. 

[Davino]

Thank you all for your answers.

I finally figured out what was happening to me. After doing shadow work it seems that pretty nasty stuff came from places I didn't even know where there.

Parts of myself that I had denied, repressed, hidden, hated, fought against, changed, silenced... Just appeared again into the light of my awareness.

However, before the fragmentations fully came up to the surface, a myriad of feelings came before. Like some ice cube from deep inside the ocean just started rising towards the surface.

The purge was unexpected and felt bad honestly. I didn't understand why out of nowhere I felt so empty, depressed, unmotivated, my mind kidnapped by many long forgotten fantasies.... Afterwards, I started seeing those in the shadow fragments of myself that where coming to light. 

That fragment of me that had to be brutally shut up to keep going on with my university studies and finish what I started even though some voice kept saying that was not meant for me. That lost fragment of myself is being reintagrated now. As Carl Jung says to integrate the shadow there is no easy technique fit for all but rather it's like the art of diplomacy. Shadow integration is then, a deeply personal proccess of negotiation with oneself. 

Another fragment of myself that popped was just the incredible ammount of sexual hunger for other women, as well as this need of being a player. It felt like this primitive masculine women conqueror drive, long lost and locked up, was for the first time freed. A part of myself that I strictly repressed in my early years of the spiritual path for being unholy and lustful. This fragment of my psyche was even more denied and repressed in order to have a healthy happy long lasting relationship with my woman. Which makes total sense but there is a price in pushing parts of your personality into the unconscious because they are unacceptable to society, family, friends or partner. That price is wholeness and individuation; and finally consciousness, self-awareness, self-understanding, self-acceptance and self-love. The process of negotiation is obviously on, to integrate in a healthy and holistic way all aspects of my psyche.

Shadow work is very wild and I'm just dipping my toes in the water. I feel more human and humbled. Discovering that you are not the rigtheous image that you have of yourself is tough. Realising you have this virtuous self image because you pushed all your bad qualities or unacceptable traits into your deep unconscious, is even harder. In the unconscious your monsters and demons grow, pulling the threads and sabotaging your life. Kidnapping your mind and actions for some time, because as parts of yourself they inevitable will manifest sooner or later. When the ego, a fragmented part of your psyche goes back online will not understand why you did what you did. I want to study this career and make this business work, why am I sabotaging myself? This is what I really want! Will say the ego. If I love her why do I feel atraction for other women? I really love her, she means everything to me! Will say the ego. However, the full psyche and human-self, as the compilation of all fragments, is more self contradictory than the little cherry picked psychic parts that ended up making your conscious personality, ego and righteous self image. Till all fragments are not healed, worked through, cried into and out of them, integrated healthily and unified, there is no hope for wholeness and individuation. You will never be yourself, as a human! Not even mentioning anything transhuman. You won't be yourself, wow. That's failing as a human. What job more do you have in here, than to discover who you are and live the best life in tune with who you are? How can you do that if you don't wanna look inside that hidden dark humid closet in your psyche?

Maybe its time to clean those corpses you have buried in the shadows...

[Yimpa]

Quote

Emotional Mastery: What do you do when you don't feel good?

Nothing. Allow yourself to not feel good fully without needing to change or deny it.

[Wilhelm44]

8 hours ago, Yimpa said:

Nothing. Allow yourself to not feel good fully without needing to change or deny it.

Feeling is one aspect of it. The understanding that what you're feeling is mostly just an inner child's reactions to not having had all their needs met, and that you now have the power to fulfill all those needs internally - this makes all the difference. 

Edited February 3 by Wilhelm44

[CoolDreamThanks]

I remind myself that feeling is a consequence of thinking, so I stop thinking and rest in the Peace of God in which there is no suffering, only joy.