Gabith

Addicted to porn

176 posts in this topic

1 hour ago, Terell Kirby said:

The counter-intuitive thing is we often think the addiction is the problem.

But it's the guilt that follows the activity in that keeps you in a vicious cycle. Stop feeling bad about falling off the wagon from time to time.

Also .. we need to stop categorizing things as an "addiction" so readily. Being addicted has two main traits:

  1. An inability to stop after repeated attempts.
  2. Participating in activity causes physical, mental, spiritual, financial and emotional harm to self and others.

I find rarely that occasional jerking off to porn results in the above. Make sure you are not being influence by societal programming that tells you expressing your sexuality is a bad thing. Healthy men are born horny .. we are designed to sow our seeds indiscriminately .. porn is often a healthy outlet to these (natural) animalistic cravings.

True


In Tate we trust

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Your not going to get a healthy answer from Leo as he seems to have a porn addiction. 

Edited by Leilani

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Society, especially religious households will instill in you a deep conditioning against porn and sexuality in general. 
 

it can run much deeper than you think.

This is often mixed with real signal from your heart telling you that you are capable of more in terms of relationships. 

heal your psyche and listen to your heart is my answer.

Edited by Bob Seeker

A Call to Live Differently: https://angeloderosa.com

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34 minutes ago, Bob Seeker said:

This is often mixed with real signal from your heart telling you that you are capable of more in terms of relationships. 

I feel like people with higher “intelligence” in the abstract sense seek out more variety in sex, a hyperactive brain that thrives on complexity and intricacies, varieties.. but they are also people who can threaten the status quo via deconstruction of traditional marriage/monogamy for example hence tend to be demonized.. 


I am Lord of Heaven, Second Coming of Jesus Christ. ❣ Warning: nobody here has reached the true God.

         ┊ ┊⋆ ┊ . ♪ 星空のディスタンス ♫┆彡 what are you dreaming today?

                           天国が来る | 私は道であり、真実であり、命であり。

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23 minutes ago, iceprincess said:

 

@Leo Gura why do most girls people suck at sex?

 

:ph34r:


I am Lord of Heaven, Second Coming of Jesus Christ. ❣ Warning: nobody here has reached the true God.

         ┊ ┊⋆ ┊ . ♪ 星空のディスタンス ♫┆彡 what are you dreaming today?

                           天国が来る | 私は道であり、真実であり、命であり。

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So why don’t we all just give up on girls and just stick with porn then. ?

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Thing is, where is the love in porn? It's just loveless naked bodies, rubbing against eachother. Love is missing that's what you feel. Porn is a transaction, true intimacy is love.


Please do not take anything I say as an insult. I have 17 warning points and I'd like to stay on this forum.

You are Love.

1 year meditation, 1 hour daily https://www.actualized.org/forum/topic/76489-1-year-meditation-1h-daily-start-at-100122/

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“Porn is better than a woman” is just the male version of  ‘’a dildo is better than a man”

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8 minutes ago, Gregory1 said:

Thing is, where is the love in porn? It's just loveless naked bodies, rubbing against eachother. Love is missing that's what you feel. Porn is a transaction, true intimacy is love.

I suppose thats the point.  With porn there is no fear of opening up to love or being seen by someone.  It’s a way to get your kicks without having to reciprocate. 
 

2 minutes ago, Knowledge Hoarder said:

? Tbh, you just hit the nail on the head. Noone will ever convince me that sex can be worse than porn, ever.

Lol. Yeah and I mean, sure it’s nice if you’re feeling lazy, but to reach a point where it’s actually better than sex then that could be the point of no return..

although I can also understand it is probably better than going out on pursuit of one night stands. 
One night stands are never that great, sex gets better over several times with the same person. 

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41 minutes ago, Pavement said:

“Porn is better than a woman” is just the male version of  ‘’a dildo is better than a man”

You guys are missing the point .. it's much more nuanced.

Men and women often have mediocre relationships, with a sex life that is dry. In many cases, they'll resort to porn or dildo's over cheating on their partner (if they have an ounce of integrity). People settle for low-grade relationships and marriages more than you think.

A benefit of porn and dildos (for single people and incels) is that you get your physical needs met, without the emotional component that leads to heartbreak, codependency and toxicity. I'm not saying one is better than the other, but there is no one-size-fits-all way of thinking that you can readily rely on.

Edited by Terell Kirby

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@Terell KirbyKirbythis is really sad. Relationships are the best part about life. I know many people who have very happy Relationships they just work at it. I don't even want to imagine a world where every one is just watching porn and avoiding intimacy because they may get hurt. 

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2 minutes ago, Leilani said:

Relationships are the best part about life. 

Healthy relationships are.

3 minutes ago, Leilani said:

I know many people who have very happy Relationships they just work at it.

No one is denying healthy relationships are possible. But you'd also need to be realistic that there are many toxic, and unhealthy relationships that exist in society .. maybe even more so.

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@Leo Gura 

Watching porn today is like the equivelant of prehistoric times watching the alpha fuck the girl you desire and you jerking off in the bushes.

I'd personally rather be the one doing the fucking.

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@MarkusR Pretty sure from the Curt Jaimungal interview Leo has stated he jerks off to softcore porn


“We have two ears and one mouth so we can listen twice as much as we speak." -Epictetus

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“Many girls suck at sex”  

and that’s how porn corrupts your mind, porn is not real life it’s a fantasy and ‘real people’ will never live up to that.  If you (people) weren’t watching porn all the time you wouldn’t be comparing every woman or man to it.  No wonder people are insecure about sex. 
 

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@Tangerinedream Unpopular opinion, but it could also be a product of childhood unmet needs, which gets transmuted into an addiction when puberty hits. At least this is how a lot of therapists see things/are trained to view things, in addition to explanations such as not being in compatible/healthy relationships, understanding oneself, lacking in skills to communicate needs/wants to partner(s).


I am Lord of Heaven, Second Coming of Jesus Christ. ❣ Warning: nobody here has reached the true God.

         ┊ ┊⋆ ┊ . ♪ 星空のディスタンス ♫┆彡 what are you dreaming today?

                           天国が来る | 私は道であり、真実であり、命であり。

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@Gabith Letting go of all that suppression and allowing myself to be the horny monster that i am has greatly improved the quality of my life.

Now I can jerk off to porn and then immediately work out, or meditate, or go out, or whatever.

Sometimes the body just craves to see another beautiful, sexy body.

I think it's good to satisfy that need and then go about my day.

Depending on what you are doing with your life currently.

Again, there is a time and place for abstinence.

Certainly people have done exceptionally in life without worrying about retaining their semen and not seeing boobies.

Ultimately, the solution is to be conscious that every "thing" is yourSelf.

And also to understand how the emotional guidance system works, i would say.

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