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About Tangerinedream

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  1. I’m saying girls who grew up without a healthy loving father figure, are the ones who mostly get attracted to toxic men. if you look around, all the people who had healthy upbringings with 2 emotionally present mother/father figures, easily get into secure relationships from a young age and have no problems with commitment or intimacy. They’re just naturally loving and connect with someone naturally. For the rest of us, who have attachment issues and felt alone in the world, we have to work harder to maintain or find healthy relationships because we use protection mechanisms because we are afraid of love - because we don’t think we are worthy of love so come up with lots of stories to confirm that.
  2. You have to realise that women are still finding themselves after 1000s of years of repression. Of course we are going to be confused and attracted to toxic men, especially when young. It’s all we have known. Unless you are a girl who had a loving, emotionally present and healthy father then you’re gonna get attracted to assholes later in life. And if you didn’t then you will be confused about men. you live you learn.
  3. Who are these ‘top tier 10%’ men that you speak of? And what makes them so special that every girl apparently wants to date them? If you are talking about ceo, wall street types who are dating other celebs and models etc. then who the hell cares? I agree with the other poster that this is very stage orange stuff. If you wanna be like them then you should follow the path of making money and creating a hot shot high status for yourself. Because supermodels and millionaires will keep mixing whether you like it or not, because that is their social circle… there is really not many ‘normal’ women out there who will try and get a high status boyfriend, unless she’s a gold digger. But the majority of women simply aren’t mixing in those high class social circles. Most ‘normal’ or non-rich people meet eachother and have relationships by socialising and building connections… yes, women typically want a man who shows emotional strength and who makes her feel secure in this world, and you don’t need to be high status to make a woman feel taken care of. So what?
  4. I’m talking about the language and offensive words and phrases used. It’s offensive language and degrading towards women regardless of what the context was..then all that matters is the words and phrases used and how others will percieve them. So even if you think you were being casual when you wrote that stuff, there are people who will be triggered or people who will parrot it in toxic ways.
  5. The way leo shuts down any talk about anti-vax. The same moderation should be taken here when it’s inciting hate against women. But it won’t be because it’s so normalised.
  6. @Eph75 yes of course. But people should also take responsibility for their own actions and what they are saying. Just another case of the triggerer taking no blame and the triggered one having to accept it rather than coming together as a community. But this isn’t just about any one solo person being triggered, this type of language incites hate in the community. And of course it’s going to be women who are more triggered since most stuff is directed towards them, so men won’t notice it as much.
  7. People please be more conscious about the way you word things and speak about others. There is so much toxic language being used here, lots of profanity towards others and hateful words. Especially in regards to women. Very offensive words and phrases get used all the time, this is supposed to be a personal development and consciousness forum. Please just think about what you’re saying and how what you say might be triggering or upsetting.
  8. Jesus. So toxic. Why such vulgar language?! @Leo Gura this is why you need to be careful about the way you talk about women on this forum, this sounds exactly like what OP says and he’s just parroting you! Clearly young guys here take what you say and just parrot it, taking it as gospel and adds to the internalized misogyny.
  9. I would say weakness is more about emotional and mental weakness rather than physical weakness.
  10. It’s very easy to absorb people’s ‘bad’ energy. This is giving me the chills thinking about it, because I’ve definitely experienced this before. I think it’s especially true for empaths and highly sensitive people. I also heard sadguru say before that if you wear white you reflect people’s energies and if you wear black you absorb it. He recommended that you should wear white to a funeral rather than black!
  11. Great post thanks for sharing your insights could you give an example about a woman needing to incorporate her masculine side? If a woman suppresses her masculine, how will that play out?
  12. If you are making a partner jealous or crazy you have to ask yourself, what am I doing to make my partner feel unseen, unloved or uncared for? Yes they should take responsibility to work on their issues but you also need to take responsibility for your actions and relationship dynamic. If you’re incapable of being their for another and meeting their needs and aren’t going to change anything for them then know when to walk away.
  13. Yes jealousy in high degrees becomes neurotic and problematic when it’s taken to extremes. but there is nothing wrong with the normal human desire/need for bonding. Humans thrive when they have strong relationships and bonds with another. Trust and connection are some things that create a strong bond with another. If you didn’t have this as a child then you will grow up feeling insecure. So this is what people are searching for, that missing piece and they try to fill the void through sex and other stuff…. But actually what they want is that human bond, and once you get that true bond with intimacy, then you stop searching. Yes you can and should try to overcome neurotic feelings of jealousy and other things like anger. But you don’t need to try and overcome your natural human desire for pair bonding with another. There is nothing wrong with it, and there’s nothing wrong with someone being hurt when a bond is broken. It’s like when a child’s sibling gets more attention, then that makes them jealous. It’s a human reaction to lack of love, lack of attention or feeling seen. Don’t try and suppress your needs, instead find a compatible partner who is not afraid to meet your needs.
  14. Actually aren’t you the one In an open relationship? I’m not saying this is the reason, but it could be the unconscious reason, maybe your gf doesn’t feel secure and contained by you In the relationship so she is feeling resentful, and so it comes out in bursts of anger or frustration towards you. You try and ignore her or leave her alone so that emphasise more that you aren’t containing her. And come to think of it, girls who I know of In open relationships were often hostile towards their partners, they weren’t truly happy but were pretending to be out of fear of losing them. a feminine woman feels the most safe and secure with a masculine man who offers containment and grounds her but gives her enough space to flow, without making her anxious of abandonment. Because as soon as she fears that he can’t be trusted or that he will leave her easily, it forces her to go in her masculine mode which is defensive, hostile, passive aggressive, argumentative or close off all feelings.
  15. Girls repress a lot of their feelings and anger in relationships, and pms is harder to suppress. This could come in angry bursts. Might seem like it’s for no reason but maybe there is an underlying reason? how is the overall vibe of the relationship? Do you get the feeling your girl is happy and fulfilled? If you say she is really starting arguments or just being outright aggressive, and not just moody, then I would try and see if there is some passive aggressive anger going on that’s directed towards you. Speaking from experience, the times I got mad at someone during pms it’s because there was something I was pissed off about, but couldn’t express it, so it would come out in passive aggressive ways. Sometimes it’s uncontrollable. whereas if I’m in a healthy mindset, around supportive people, am exercising and stress levels are low, then I just become very tired and a bit moody and wanna be left alone. I’m quite a moody person overall and enjoy alone time, and when I have pms it’s like a dark cloud is following me around and I don’t handle stress so well, so I get easily overwhelmed and feel depressed..i also can become more clingy and wanting to be close to my partner. but rarely would I lash out or start arguments unless there was some deeper resentment going on. I would yell at my mother during my teen years and always had a certain feeling of anger and frustration towards her. So it could be something like this. the feminine needs masculine containment to feel safe and secure in the world, so of they don’t have that then it turns them hostile and defensive.