Persipnei

22 year old addiction is currently my biggest road block

24 posts in this topic

So last week, I gave this one a wake up call. This whole life makes sense now, and has changed for the better day by day. Emotions, thoughts, ego uprisings, ... I see them quicker and quicker and the reactions to it are getting more in line with Love. I know it's a long road ahead, but having seen a piece of the map, I'm very willing to take it.

My biggest problem seems to be my cannabis addiction. I was quite concious when I was a kid, but things turned ugly when I became a teenager. I always did good to others because I felt like doing it, but I lacked self-love and started smoking. With the ups and downs that came in live, so went my usage up and down. So it's clearly what I have used all those years to fill the void.

The last few years I got it "under control", but would like to stop it completely. At this point though, it seems I'm not yet ready to do, my ego is stronger than my will in this...

I guess my question is: I see the origin of the trouble, I see the symptom, where do I get the power to not fall back into ego when I start craving. The attachment for this one is real... well... feels real :-)

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@Persipnei Went trough that one. Good thing is it is just psychological addiction, not physical like nicotine. 

Do not force it. When desire arises accept it, and then instead of smoking some, eat an apple, drink some water, or do some squats. This way you can "fool" your mind. 

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On a related note I think Osho once suggested that to cure an addiction, you can allow yourself to indulge anytime you want, with the caveat that you have to maintain a meditative state of awareness as you do it. I have found that one very effective.

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When I gave up smoking tobacco, I set a date for my last cig, then on that evening I chain smoked about 10 till I felt sick and so my final memory of smoking was UGH and I remembered that feeling when I started craving again.  I realise that cannabis is a different type of addiction, but if you try cleaning up your whole lifestyle - good sleep, diet, exercise, regular meditation & yoga habits etc - you will feel better and can associate this with self-love. Replace old habits with new ones. I know this sounds binary but it should help to get you over the hump of cravings - remember these are only temporary and you will move on and grow. 

Good luck and stay positive that you can achieve this! 

Edited by silene

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Great tips. I'm gonna try out some new things. I do meditate and walk in nature daily, but something to chew on or put focus on might help. Thank you!

 

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know that the self-discipline and work you put in to overcoming it leads to things far better than what weed can give you. that's how you'll never fall back into old ways, by replacing it with something undeniably better.

I tried weed out of curiosity after I had been meditating for multiple hours daily for years already, and though I can understand the appeal, it actually brought me to a state less desirable than my baseline—(what I feel all the time without any help)

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21 minutes ago, willl said:

know that the self-discipline and work you put in to overcoming it leads to things far better than what weed can give you. that's how you'll never fall back into old ways, by replacing it with something undeniably better.

I tried weed out of curiosity after I had been meditating for multiple hours daily for years already, and though I can understand the appeal, it actually brought me to a state less desirable than my baseline—(what I feel all the time without any help)

The strange thing is... I used everything I could get my hands on when I was younger. I used very irresponsible and was addicted to amphetamines for years, but needed nothing more than an insight to completely stop those. Couldn't see anything good in those anymore.

Ganja brought me a lot, it was my companion for half this life. Hard to say goodbye... But I know you are right. It's time...

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11 hours ago, smurf88 said:

 

On a related note I think Osho once suggested that to cure an addiction, you can allow yourself to indulge anytime you want, with the caveat that you have to maintain a meditative state of awareness as you do it. I have found that one very effective.

how to do so? did he reccomend?

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Behind every addiction there are a bunch of unfulfilled needs. What's your need? It may be connection, meaningful career, relationships, etc. 

Getting into a community where people have the same problems and share experiences can be quite helpful. The realization of "I'm not struggling alone" can be quite helpful. You may try some facebook groups. 

Deep relaxation is a short-cut to quitting addiction. It releases pleasurable chemicals as addictions do, only they are healthy and long-lasting. My favorite method is yoga+meditation (guided preferably). I feel like my body is soaking in the good energy automatically. I don't debate with myself when it comes to compulsive behaviors. And the cravings do not show up as often. I recommend it to you. All the best!

 

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Read Russell Brands book 

Recovery: Freedom from our addictions

it goes over in detail how he overcame every addiction out there using a revamped 12 step method that actually goes into why you’re addicted & sustainable solutions

it takes work though   


'One is always in the absolute state, knowingly or unknowingly for that is all there is.' Francis Lucille. 

'Peace and Happiness are inherent in Consciousness.' Rupert Spira 

“Your own Self-Realization is the greatest service you can render the world.” Ramana Maharshi

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@Persipnei

 

Addictions which are hard to let go are usually due to some inner feeling that you are trying to run away from. A clue as to how to solve the problem was there in your own post: you started it because you lacked self love. Try to get in touch with that part of you that lacked self love and give itself the love it needs. Get in touch with the memories of how you felt before taking weed and show that inner part of you having those memories your unconditional love. This might help.

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@Persipnei hey just curious.. what symptoms arise when you can’t smoke for a day or two? 
 

Asking as a fellow self medicating cannabis user. 

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On 10/13/2020 at 7:23 AM, Persipnei said:

So last week, I gave this one a wake up call. This whole life makes sense now, and has changed for the better day by day. Emotions, thoughts, ego uprisings, ... I see them quicker and quicker and the reactions to it are getting more in line with Love. I know it's a long road ahead, but having seen a piece of the map, I'm very willing to take it.

My biggest problem seems to be my cannabis addiction. I was quite concious when I was a kid, but things turned ugly when I became a teenager. I always did good to others because I felt like doing it, but I lacked self-love and started smoking. With the ups and downs that came in live, so went my usage up and down. So it's clearly what I have used all those years to fill the void.

The last few years I got it "under control", but would like to stop it completely. At this point though, it seems I'm not yet ready to do, my ego is stronger than my will in this...

I guess my question is: I see the origin of the trouble, I see the symptom, where do I get the power to not fall back into ego when I start craving. The attachment for this one is real... well... feels real :-)

@Persipnei Hi, I have a 25 YO cannabis addiction myself. And I also got it ''under control'' the last couple of years. I smoke 4 days a week on average.


I would like to stop it for a couple of months but I can only stop for a couple of weeks.

 

 

On 10/13/2020 at 7:39 AM, Dario1995 said:

Went trough that one. Good thing is it is just psychological addiction, not physical

Not true. When I stop smoking I get the sweats night and day, insomnia, lack of appetite and serious irritability. Sounds (and feels) like physical withdrawal syndrome to me. 

 

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@Persipnei Overcoming an addiction is quite tricky becaause you have to put a lot of effort in the game.

By giving you these advice I'm referring to 2 main books that I suggets you reading: "Psychocibernetics" by Maxwell Malz and "The way of the superior man" by David Deida

The main point in eradicate an addicion is to see why are you doing that: in most cases we find security in certain practice and makes us feel that all is under control, for example eating for suppress sadness.

So I suggest to you to start noticing with all of your energy and concentration the precise moment that you find yourself in need of cannabis and stay there feeling that need without doing anything. after that relax your whole body from the tension created by the need. Lastly find what you are trying to suppress/resisting and give voice to that. Stupid example: if you find yourself angry scream or puch a pillow

Doing just this is difficult so you can introduce a punishment at the beginning of this process  to roll  some momentum. For example you can give 20 bucks to your friends or to a charity organization everytime you smoke some weed. If you don't stop go with 30 bucks and so on. 

I don't like very much this option because is really painful but it defenatly works

hope that this has helped<3

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First of all, thank you for sharing your experience and being so open and vulnerable in that. I can really sense that you're doing beautifully on your path and that you're serious about your self-actualization progress. This in itself already makes you a warrior in my eyes.

I'm at a point where I am 29 now, and I've smoked for a long time. I no longer smoke, and I can see the downsides, but I can also definitely see the upsides. The increased perspective, the higher insights, the physical relaxation. I'm not saying that there aren't any downsides because they are obviously there, but try to be honest with yourself.

Are you in an upwards movement in your life energetically? Do you feel you need more understanding, more insight, a higher perspective, more connection to the world of 'Spirit' and insight? Do you need inspiration for your life? (Feminine Pole)

Or

Are you ready to ground yourself? Do you feel you need social interaction, physical intimacy, the manifestation of your dreams and putting your inspiration into action? (Masculine Pole)

In the last case, I would advise you to really see why you want to stop smoking, how smoking really stands in between you and your most fulfilling dreams, your most abundant service and your most blissful potential. This will make the process much easier. The craving for weeds goes away once you start to channel that addictive energy into your dreams, your creativity and your physical strength, vibrancy and well-being. The first days seem impossible but after a few nights the worst part is over.

P.S.: One last word of advise I would give to you and my 22-year-old self: don't be too hard on yourself for smoking and try to do your best to approach the act of smoking from the compassionate and loving perspective that your deepest inner child has certain anxieties, fears and emotional confrontations that may be hard to handle. The illusion or maya of life can be confusing and the responsibilities can be hard. Sometimes we need to focus on self-actualizing, improving ourselves and being strict,  but don't forget that the other half is simply being, enjoying, playing and relaxing in the wondrous gardens of Life's beauty.

Be honest with yourself where your needs lie, and then take to take full responsibility for those needs and dreams. 

 

Edited by Darlisto

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Hello wonderful people!

Sorry I didn't reply after my last post. I got busy... It's 2 months later and a lot has happened.

Life always gets you what you need, so as soon as I decided I really wanted to quit, every call I did to a dealer got no answer or the dealer was out of stuff. So I hadn't really a choice other than quitting. I drank a lot (2-3 liters a day) of a herb mix that lessens the physical withdrawal and about 2 weeks later I woke up one day without any craving.

I have smoked since, a social situation where I took a few puffs and although I liked it and it felt like coming home, it was more like visiting a house where you once lived and seeing all the problems that house had.

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Nice one @Persipnei 

It sounds like you've overcome this. It sure gives respect for how powerful an addiction to a more addictive substance like opioids, benzodiazepines, stimulants or alcohol can be, and how much of a challenge that could be to someone wrapped in those tendrils.

Watch out for addictive behaviour in other aspects of your life. 


How to get to infinity? Divide by zero.

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