Natasha

Enlightenment Jokes Here

2,184 posts in this topic

This may have been posted already but it's a pretty good one:

A Zen master visiting New York City goes up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything."
The hot dog vendor fixes a hot dog and hands it to the Zen master, who pays with a $20 bill.
The vendor puts the bill in the cash box and closes it. "Excuse me, but where’s my change?" asks the Zen master.
The vendor responds, "Change must come from within."

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By legalizing Cannabis and same-sex marriage we finally interpreted the bible correctly


"A man who lays with another man should be stoned"


The Matrix is everywhere, it is all around us, even now in this very room. You can see it when you look out your window, or you turn on your television. You can feel it when you go to work, when you go to church, when you pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth.

Morpheus (The Matrix)

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Posted (edited)

On 16.8.2019. at 10:06 PM, peanutspathtotruth said:

Phahahha this guy... @Shin why did you do that, I'll never get this out of my mind

Hahaha 😂😂😂😂

I think It's cute. 😂 Our beloved Brown bear. 

NXGEuW1.png

Edited by zeroISinfinity

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On 8/16/2019 at 10:53 AM, traveler said:

I had a full body massage yesterday with the intention of healing some energy blockages. It was wonderful, but halfway through I felt the blood starting to rush into my lil king down there, as she was touching some very sensitive areas. What I was unaware of was that a full body massage also includes the front. She asked me to lay on my back and I naturally got very aware of my wood down there, and that there was absolutely no way that she wouldn't notice. Throughout the rest of the session I could not think about anything else than getting rid of my wood, I tried all of the methods I've been using during self Inquiry "Who is the one having a boner," and " "surrender into the experience" etc. And all of this was of course resistance. It didn't go away throughout the rest of the session. 

Might not be an enlightenment joke, but it surely was an embarrassing/funny twist that initially was supposed to be something "spiritual." 

Funny story, thanks for the laugh xD

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@traveler  Dude this happens to me too everytime I go to the orthodontics/dentist xD Dentists shouldn't be so thicc

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On 16. 8. 2019 at 4:53 PM, traveler said:

"Who is the one having a boner," 

Dude, I would have bursted out laughing at that thought. Totally feel you.

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What is atheism?

A non-prophet organization.


The Matrix is everywhere, it is all around us, even now in this very room. You can see it when you look out your window, or you turn on your television. You can feel it when you go to work, when you go to church, when you pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth.

Morpheus (The Matrix)

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On 8/16/2019 at 7:53 AM, traveler said:

I had a full body massage yesterday with the intention of healing some energy blockages. It was wonderful, but halfway through I felt the blood starting to rush into my lil king down there, as she was touching some very sensitive areas. What I was unaware of was that a full body massage also includes the front. She asked me to lay on my back and I naturally got very aware of my wood down there, and that there was absolutely no way that she wouldn't notice. Throughout the rest of the session I could not think about anything else than getting rid of my wood, I tried all of the methods I've been using during self Inquiry "Who is the one having a boner," and " "surrender into the experience" etc. And all of this was of course resistance. It didn't go away throughout the rest of the session. 

Might not be an enlightenment joke, but it surely was an embarrassing/funny twist that initially was supposed to be something "spiritual." 

lmao this right here is a golden comedy bit


"Started from the bottom and I just realized I'm still there since the money and the fame is an illusion" -Drake doing self-inquiry

"F*ck the materialist paradigm coming straight from the metaphysical" -  woke N.W.A.

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B28FB926-9DA1-49BB-8847-4CA3E4986E6B.jpeg

4CBF4D66-D0F0-4CDC-B10B-73D51779308B.jpeg


"There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so." Shakespeare

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2 hours ago, MsNobody said:

B28FB926-9DA1-49BB-8847-4CA3E4986E6B.jpeg

Thanks for this one

😌


The Matrix is everywhere, it is all around us, even now in this very room. You can see it when you look out your window, or you turn on your television. You can feel it when you go to work, when you go to church, when you pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth.

Morpheus (The Matrix)

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@abrakamowse 💛💛✨

So true!! 

My mind does that all the time 😂 


"There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so." Shakespeare

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@MsNobody 🙏🙏🙏


The Matrix is everywhere, it is all around us, even now in this very room. You can see it when you look out your window, or you turn on your television. You can feel it when you go to work, when you go to church, when you pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth.

Morpheus (The Matrix)

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Nothing can make you happy until Nothing can make you happy.

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vWk4Tdy.png


Nothing can make you happy until Nothing can make you happy.

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when you do spiritual work and start to feel the ego backlash coming on... 

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@nistake OMG 😂😂😂

On 9/1/2019 at 4:05 AM, nistake said:

 

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"There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so." Shakespeare

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9igjWhg.jpg


Nothing can make you happy until Nothing can make you happy.

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