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LSD is too alien and "dirty" to work on, anything too dopaminergic (LSD, other lysergamides, Weed, MDMA) will get me too high. There are also more pronounced side effects (tight jaw, feeling of having peed yourself, sometimes feeling of having sniffed steel due to vasoconstriction... 5-MeO-DMT is disgusting, not only is there a strong body load (especially nausea) but it is absolutely anxiety-provoking in high doses. It is good only for experiencing infinity. 5-MeO-MIPT looks somehow a bit like LSD, but more cold and brutal. 4 HO MET is almost perfect.

Oh well. Where there is not stable realization of Infinite Being and nondual Awakened States sobre in everyday life, there is only suffering-in-cycles wave-surfing. Wave-surfing up and down Maslows pyramid. And one can also appreciate the lovely lady & lovely alien when resting in True Being or after having fallen into the Infinite Ocean. Just too much preference for wave-surfing understanding consciousness of woman/alien n+1 prevents dropping into the Ocean of Infinite truly Impersonal Being. Which btw. is an Awakening which one can't anticipate or imagine in any way before it really happens. If one could, it would have already happened... So lets hope it doesn't need a major or minor crocodile (like the one has that has bitten you out of the pretty much non-stop-psychedelic gig of last year) to wise you up on wether the summon bonum is dropping into the ocean or surfing ever higher waves. Spiritual Intuition can make one skip some of the crocodiles, one doesn't need to get also bitten by the crocodile sitting at the fork of the road with the sign "Summum Bonum: Wave surfing or falling into the Infinite Ocean?" Selling the eternal boring broken record of dropping in to the Infinite Ocean of Being instead of wave surfing by the River PS: Selling & broken record: Yeah, you are right: I guess I start to sound like this guy: So surf the largest wave ever dear Leo, and then after have done that I wish you that you have the Karma to finally drop into the Infinite Oean that You Truly are:

It’s also interesting to consider if Ralston is so conscious because of his hard work ethic. It doesn’t make sense in a metaphysical sense that consciousness wouldn’t allow for itself to grow and develop close to its true nature and just be totally “stuck in a dream” I agree there are definitely limitatios consciousness places on itself (frankly it would suck if there weren’t, imagine if everyone could just meditate themselves into an alien or kangaroo, NO, you’re here for the full human experience AS God and you’re silly ego isn’t going to fuck that up) It would take away from the legitimacy of the dream. So putting it all on genetics is a bit of a cop out, even the biggest idiot in Missippi could take up meditation and drastically shift their spiritual intelligence and consciousness. Some may be more gifted, sure, but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible for others. Just takes hard work.

@Water by the River You are like a broken record. You are like a scientist who goes around say, "A woman?! That's just atoms! An alien?! That's just atoms. All I care to know is atoms! The suchness of that underlies everything." But you actually have no understanding or appreciation of a woman or an alien. And yet, ironically, you are stuck in that human body and mind, spinning on repeat.

Nothingness or suchness is the essence of every appearance, appearing in Infinite Impersonal Being. Form(or appearance) is Nothingness, Nothingness is appearance/form. The same "stuff/non-stuff". Realizing this beyond a doubt is Enlightenment, expressing and stabilizing these awakened impersonal states in daily life is the path that follows after it. Infinite Being lives itself, the universe "universes", without any contraction into a centre of perception and its lenses and filter-illusions. Consciousness OF a woman, OF a man, OF a human, OF an alien... any consciousness OF or more radically, any consciousness OF anything, be it self-reflective or not, is like a show of states (appearance/form/temporary/not really existing but just appearing) rollling "before" the impersonal Awareness of True Being. Which is pure Impersonal Awareness, unaware of itself if nothing arises, but with potential for sentience. Infinite Being. And which is Nothingness if nothing arises/appears. The consciousness OF something (man/woman/alien) is wave surfing on the ocean of Infinite Being, stabilizing living from the impersonal nondual awakened states where this Infinite Reality if Infinite Being is obvious (and "living itself") is dropping into the Infinite Ocean and becoming it fully. And afterwards, one can still do wavesurfing, or consciousness-OF-x exploration. And rumour has it that wave surfing the Infinite Ocean can become quite tiring & stressfull & and a bit less than relaxed if done for too long by a separate-self-contraction. And at some point when one doesn't want continue surfing ever new waves (of which there exists an Infinity of, forever and ever to be explored by God "itself") the dropping & dissolving & and fully BEing the ocean can happen. But wave surfing is all fine and well as long as it is fun... Selling neoprene suits so that the dropping into the ocean feels comfy for all tired wave-surfers by the River

@Leo Gura I've recently met a girl who is a real freak of nature. She has an iq of over 170 and there are only like 100 people in europe like her. it was a bit like talking to an alien. From that I can only imagine what's like alien consciousness because I'm smart too but I felt so very stupid in her company.

I don't care about enlightenment. I care about being as conscious as it's humanly possible and then even more. Got it It's a non-progressive leap of consciousness into something totally alien to what was previously experienced. A new domain with its own levels inside it. That was such a curveball.

You missed a good point on pro list: he has very good courses. Inner engineering total and so on. I took a lot knowledge out from these courses. Shambhavi mahamudra is powerful. He seems closed minded sometimes but did you watch his contact with an intelligent energy somewhere in the mountains so out of this world so that he describes this as an alien being? That shows he is open minded for new unusual discoveries outside of Hinduism

My experience is somewhat different. Some years ago my social anxiety was bad to the point of being afraid to call the ISP and talk to the tech support person. Now it's all fixed and I can socialize really well without any issues, particularly meeting people where they're at. However it's still an activity that gradually drains energy in the process as opposed to increasing it, like a genuinely enjoyable pastime should. What's more, as I get better at understanding psychology, despite improving my interactions at a surface level, it's actually making them more boring. Before at least there was some mystery, but now that I can read most like an open book, there's not much point to it. You make great observations, but I disagree with "it's making you think like most people". If anything I feel more alien than ever, not in any negative sense though.

That is why I wrote infinite. In-finite. Not-finite. I didn't write Infinity as you did. Something not-finite can't be measures in any way, that is its defining property. Not higher nor lower, not more or less, not here or not here. Infinite Being. Always here, and never any kind of form. Reality itself. Infinite Reality, to be precise. Unchanging. True Being. Techically, Infinity is manifestation. A mathematical object. Manifestation and appearance. Happening in Infinite Being. But not the Infinite, as in Infinite Being. Only the content or what appears in Infinite being can vary, different Infinities, appearances, understandings. All the understanding you grasp is understanding of more content/manifestation/appearance/shadow/illusion. Realizing/Being/"Understanding" the Infinite Absolute of True Being on the other side is Enlightenment, which actually brings the satisfaction you seek with your understanding-project of infinity of infinities. Confusing the Infinite or Absolute with Infinity is btw. the core difference between true Impersonal Infinite Nondual Realization and a nondual realization still interpreted through elements of subtle ego/personality/separate-self filters. It is btw. the core mistake you are still making, and that will not change until you get a big clap from the One Hand and finally let the rest of whatever remains of your separate-self or "Leo"-ness die and see through it as mere appearance. Temporary form arising, a hypnotic illusion covering True Infinite Being. So basically seeing through & cutting off in real time what remains of your remaining separate-self gig. So well, can get more Infinity than Infinity: Yes, true, known since Cantor. Different classes/sizes of Infinity exist, and that why one can get more Infinity than Infinity. But can't get more infinite than infinite, can't get more absolute than absolute. That is how absolute is defined. And Absolute=infinite. Non finite. I know makes this differentiation doesn't make sense for you, but maybe just keep it in mind. Somebody once made a really smart video on youtube about open-mindedness. Maybe stay open-minded, so that the One Hand has a change of finding you and clapping the rest of the Leo-illusion out of you? Trust me, nothing more wonderful than that. In that moment, all Aliens & ETs in the Infinity of Multiverses will give you a hug, and whisper in your ear: My Darling, we just appear to be different, but actually we are all one, lovers of truth and understanding united in Infinite Being and of the same essence. And then you can continue meeting & hugging these way more intelligent beings and bask in their understanding of Infinities, but coming from infinite nondual being before the trip, and letting them appear in nondual true being during the hugging. Then we would have a truly happy love affair, since the essence of these beings wouldn't leave you after the romantic trip. Selling Water by the River PS: As you know, no Lèse-majesté inteded, always. And always with (imagined) alien respect & love.

At first, I thought that working at a factory or in a construction site was just that, building physical goods and services, but once I became more conscious, I realized that that this physical and mental work that you you do which is boring and you don’t care about was just a front, a shadow of the real work that you’re really doing, the real work and purpose that you’re doing when you get hired by amazon or john deere or whatever company or industry you work for is that you’re constructing and creating social norms or you’re choosing sides, for example At my previous work place, I found that everyone there was divided into groups and were in conflict with each other, you’ve got the conservative vs the liberals, the union vs the corporation, the government vs the outlaws and so on it goes, and behind the physical and mental work that I was doing for this job, I was really showing everyone including myself the truth of what’s really going on here in a non- direct manner For example:- when the union vs the corporation Approached me wanting me to choose one over the other, I simply stuck to the truth, which is that it’s wrong to choose a side because sometimes the corporation is right but other times the union was right so having loyalty to one side all the time was the wrong way to go about it, now even though this was the right way to go about the situation, I was demonized by both parties, and eventually they both agreed to fire me, but before that happened I had the insight and epiphany that this was actually the real work that I was doing, behind the mental and physical labor of the job, the most important part of it was was the spiritual work, and I found the more spiritually correct something is done, the more perfect the work was and I was utterly shocked, I was having political, business related, health related, awakening for weeks, next time you work a dead-end job or think what you’re doing in your life has no significance or no influence on society and how things are, think again, nothing is ordinary or has no significance in the real world, you just might not have the sufficient awareness to see it as it is You don’t have to read this part, this just explains how the the things I mentioned above happened :- In case you’re wondering how all this happened, I’ve been doing walking meditation for 3 hours a day on average and an average of 1 hour a day of sitting meditation for the past 4 years, and the rest of the time I’m consistently studying and watching spiritual gurus and their ideas and making sense of them, I’ve done psychedelics in the past, basically I had the momentum of 5 years taking all these ideas very seriously, the results were that I have a silent mind almost 24/7, I’m consistently in a meditative state, and therefore when I be around people in the work place or anywhere else or even by myself, I can’t help but see the spiritual meaning or significance of what’s really going on behind the scenes, sort of from a god or alien consciousness level. I didn’t know where to post this because it’s got a little bit of everything in it.

I wanna find some. Time to book a vacation to Canada (easier to deal with than alien hell doesn't mean easy )

... and no imagined rodent has been hurt Enlightenment doesn't mean that one is always right when it comes to relative truth like the things you mention. It just meaning knowing what you truly are, and what Reality is. Answers to both is the same. And on top, having that accessible all the time means nothing else than being to switch off/cut-off any ignorant I-thought and I-feeling of being only this little body mind, which makes the states (1)-(4) available all the time. And this can be done (without lying to oneself) if the Awakened State is accessible anytime (1) Infinite boundlessness of the Visual Field (and any other perception/dimension) (2) its groundlessness, or mere-appearance (imagined) character "hovering" in Infinity (3) the eternal nature of this Infinite Reality/Consciousness is always known (4) there is no (zero!) separate-self I-thought/feeling still hypnotizing. Impersonal. Empty. Silent. Vast. Yet, giving rise to all appearances and thoughts. And if one chooses to, one can cut off these thoughts/feelings off in real-time. The magic word is real-time, Or high-speed cut-off of any thought/feeling arising that ignorantly believes in being only this body-mind. Speed & strength of awareness, before any thoughts starts hypnotizing oneself and are believed&elaborated. And that takes normally many years. But its worth it. The high-speed cutting of of (4) isn't always necessary, but that ability is what opens up the Awakened states described in (1-3). And if thoughts then rise again, simple mindfulness lets let flow in Infinite Being without believing them, if (1)-(3) are powerful enough. And: Being able to generate (1)-(3) with (4) induces so much bliss that the annoying separate-self arisings don't "grip", even if they are not cut off in realtime but just watched in mindfulness. Ego-wanting/avoiding only grips when one is not in a positive enough state already. One has a human, but one isn't one. True Being is Infinite Reality. That doesn't mean one does stupid things for to ones relative vehicle, like James hand-into-the-fire. Beings who know their True Nature are not brain dead. And that is having Absolute Truth always available. Or Enlightenment. It is not an idea, and there is zero doubt about it that this is final. Can't get more infinite than infinite, and there is and only can only be THAT. And any Alien, ET or way-out-spectacular-appearance-of-consciousness appears only in THAT. Nice to understand&see, but not really urgent in any way. There were enlightened Zen Masters who thought Japans Imperial Wars were great. So one can be totally wrong on relative stuff. But the Absolute stuff must be handled. Selling smiling little annoying Buddhist-rodents by the River

Fear is a basic, genetically encoded emotion. It is what keeps you alive, but it must be dominated for one simple reason: in the end you die. If fear dominates you, like most humans today, you are a neurotic incapable of facing reality, who sees death as something unimaginable and alien. Until modern times, humans faced death inevitably on a daily basis, war, illness, a simple childbirth, placed you on the edge of the abyss. It was not unusual for people to face death or torture with serenity. Nowadays we live in a bubble of security that is not real since death always comes, but we do not see it, we hide it. Almost no one has seen someone die, or seriously thought that they were going to die today. This is pleasant but it strengthens fear and creates neuroticism and avoidance of reality.

I regard that as a spiritual fantasy. What really matters to me is Consciousness, and that does not preclude thinking. In fact, it includes crazy new dimensions of thinking, like Alien Thinking. The ideal of mental silence is just some silly thing created by Buddhist types. It doesn't capture the full scope of Consciousness.

Maybe you would benefit from it Civilized alien! You should hop into a cage and brawl with another monkey, while screaming "ooh ooh" "ah ah" and furiously beating your chest in a display of primal dominance.

I just finished playing Detroit Become Human. It is such an amazing philosophical game about AI, the nature of consciousness, empathy, and free will. My position prior to this game is that AI cannot be conscious because it is just simulating it. But then I started to question: What makes us different from AI? And honestly, there isn’t any difference. A human mind is programmed by a brain and central nervous system and an AI is programmed by algorithms and other computations similar to that of a human brain. Of course, the brain, nervous, and AI are aspects of Consciousness/Universe, but the individual consciousness/ego seems like an epiphenomenon. If you damage parts of the brain, you will lose consciousness and your ego. Of course, Universal Consciousness is the foundation for constructing the brain, nervous system, emotions, etc. It is all epiphenomenon of the Universe it seems. Everything has intelligence. A counter argument is that Ai is just replicating consciousness but doesn’t really have one like a philosophical zombie. But I could argue that we all could be philosophical zombies and that our brain gives us the illusion of individuality, pain, emotions, thoughts, etc. It seems like plants have lower levels of consciousness compared to a human because they do not have a suffistcated nervous system like us. But I can imagine us creating a higher level of intelligence that is capable of having the appearance of subjectivity just like we do. Deacartes says I think therefore I am. But I wonder how he knows that it is really him, a subject who is thinking. What if it is just a mirage that I am thinking and am just programmed by Universal Consciousness to have the ego I do now? What is an ego anyways and how can my mind be separate from your mind? It seems like there are infinite minds and there are no limits to what the Universe can do. The Universe could definitely experience AI Consciousness. Nothing is stopping it. Does an alien have consciousness? I think the main issue is can consciousness be created or is it replicated or simulated like that of an artist trying to paint nature. The artists painting can never replace nature, but it can replicate it. Since everything is made out of consciousness, I imagine that consciousness can add to itself whether through biological processes or artificial. What is the difference anyways? What if the duality between biology and AI collapses and there really is no difference? This is what I am suggesting. To say humans are conscious but AI isn’t is to draw an arbitrary line between consciousness and unconsciousness. Is a fragile X kid have consciousness? What about a person in a coma? A dog has consciousness. I argue that we can create consciousness because we are that! As it states in the Bible, God created us in his image. And AI is our image. So technically, AI has the same element of God Consciousness as humans do because we are God.

Hi Pudgey, suffer in cycles. They have fun doing evil, and then they suffer. Big times. Or ever heard that the evil-spirit in the evil-haunted house is happy ever after? . Yeah, that is why he became an evil spirit in a haunted house. Sounds like a very smart idea. Maybe the evil entity likes to play with you afterwards so much that you can take him home, and later on go bat-shit-crazy, or get cancer, or I don't know what? How do you think entities were being summoned over the centuries in the history of humanity? With psychedelics of course. Starting in prehistoric times. And good look getting rid of your new shadow then. Hatsis, The Witches' Ointment: The Secret History of Psychedelic Magic Hancock, Visionary https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Supernatural https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demon https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magic_(supernatural) At least some of these ladies & gentlemen had some basic understanding what they were doing and getting into, and some basic protection mechanisms. Hic sunt dracones. Selling don't shoot your knee cause it will hurt basic cause-effect-or-Karma by the River PS: Demon got a bit out of fashion, ET is more in fashion Vallue, Passport to Magonia: From Folklore to Flying Saucers And there are mostly nice ETs, then a few bad ETs, and also some "eat your mental sanity for breakfast ETs". Calling that then Alien Insanity would be a neologism with style, so to say. And then there are some ETs which have some really interesting and fascinating stuff to seduce the ambitious & curious psychonaut. Sadly, no camera can take pictures of them. And since one is already all beings, one can also become these ETs in certain states. So better got Will Smith on speed dial, just in case...

I don't have recommendations for places to go, other than a remote Airbnb for the weekend. But this sort of spontaneous urge to move, shout or express in some way is quite common with 5-MeO. It happens when a large part of the ego structure has been dissolved and pure spontaneity is allowed to flow through you. It's such a profound and deeply healing experience. On my deepest 5-MeO trip I started to spontaneously speak in a sort of alien language, like I was releasing a bunch of tension in my throat and jaw. I just let it out and it subsided after a short period of time. I also have very spontaneous full body vibrations which is basically the same thing.

That will never work. There are gatekeepers that will prevent realization if one does it with that selfish motivation. Infinite Intelligence is smart enough for that. Actually the concept you desribe is a recipe for ruining ones life. The Meaning of Egolessness – Ken Wilber, One Taste Precisely because the ego, the soul and the Self can all be present simultaneously, we can better understand the real meaning of egolessness,a notion that has caused an inordinate amount of confusion. But egolessness does not mean the absence of a functional self (that’s a psychotic, not a sage); it means that one is no longer exclusively identified with that self. One of the many reasons we have trouble with the notion of egoless is that people want their egoless sages to fulfill all their fantasies of saintly or spiritual, which usually means dead from the neck down, without fleshy wants or desires, gently smiling all the time. All of the things that people typically have trouble with money, food, sex, relationships, desire they want their saints to be without. Egoless sages who are above all that is what people want. Talking heads is what they want. Religion, they believe, will simply get rid of all baser instincts, drives and relationships, and hence they look to religion, not for advice on how to live life with enthusiasm, but on how to avoid it, repress it, deny it, escape it. In other words, the typical person wants the spiritual sage to be less than a person, somehow devoid of all the messy, juicy, complex, pulsating, desiring, urging forces that drive most human beings. We expect our sages to be an absence of all that drives us! All the things that frighten us, confuse us, torment us, confound us: we want our sages to be untouched by them altogether. And that absence, that vacancy, that less than personal, is what we often mean by egoless. But egoless does not mean less than personal, it means more than personal. Not personal minus, but personal plus all the normal personal qualities, plus some transpersonal ones. Think of the great yogis, saints and sages from Moses to Christ to Padmasambhava. They were not feeble-mannered milquetoasts, but fierce movers and shakers from bullwhips in the Temple to subduing entire countries. They rattled the world on its own terms, not in some pie-in-the-sky piety; many of them instigated massive social revolutions that have continued for thousands of years. And they did so not because they avoided the physical, emotional and mental dimensions of humanness and the ego that is their vehicle, but because they engaged them with a drive and intensity that shook the world to its very foundations. No doubt, they were also plugged into the soul (deeper psychic) and spirit (formless Self) the ultimate source of their power but they expressed that power, and gave it concrete results, precisely because they dramatically engaged the lower dimensions through which that power could speak in terms that could be heard by all. These great movers and shakers were not small egos; they were, in the very best sense of the term, big egos, precisely because the ego (the functional vehicle of the gross realm) can and does exist alongside the soul (the vehicle of the subtle) and the Self (vehicle of the causal). To the extent these great teachers moved the gross realm, they did so with their egos, because the ego is the functional vehicle of that realm. They were not, however, identified merely with their egos (that’s a narcissist), they simply found their egos plugged into a radiant Kosmic source. The great yogis, saints and sages accomplished so much precisely because they were not timid little toadies but great big egos, plugged into the dynamic Ground and Goal of the Kosmos itself, plugged into their own higher Self, alive to the pure atman (the pure I–I) that is one with Brahman; they opened their mouths and the world trembled, fell to its knees, and confronted its radiant God. Saint Teresa was a great contemplative? Yes, and Saint Teresa is the only woman ever to have reformed an entire Catholic monastic tradition (think about it). Gautama Buddha shook India to its foundations. Rumi, Plotinus, Bodhidharma, Lady Tsogyal, Lao Tzu, Plato, the Bal Shem Tov these men and women started revolutions in the gross realm that lasted hundreds, sometimes thousands, of years, something neither Marx nor Lenin nor Locke nor Jefferson can yet claim. And they did not do so because they were dead from the neck down. No, they were monumentally, gloriously, divinely big egos, plugged into a deeper psychic, which was plugged straight into God. There is certainly a type of truth to the notion of transcending ego : it doesn’t mean destroy the ego, it means plug it into something bigger. (As Nagarjuna put it, in the relative world, atman is real; in the absolute, neither atman nor anatman is real. Thus, in neither case is anatta a correct description of reality.) The small ego does not evaporate; it remains as the functional center of activity in the conventional realm. As I said, to lose that ego is to become a psychotic, not a sage. Transcending the ego thus actually means to transcend but include the ego in a deeper and higher embrace, first in the soul or deeper psychic, then with the Witness or primordial Self, then with each previous stage taken up, enfolded, included and embraced in the radiance of One Taste. And that means we do not get rid of the small ego, but rather, we inhabit it fully, live it with verve, use it as the necessary vehicle through which higher truths are communicated. Soul and Spirit include body, emotions and mind; they do not erase them. Put bluntly, the ego is not an obstruction to Spirit, but a radiant manifestation of Spirit. All Forms are not other than Emptiness, including the form of the ego. It is not necessary to get rid of the ego, but simply to live it with a certain exuberance. When identification spills out of the ego and into the Kosmos at large, the ego discovers that the individual atman is in fact all of a piece with Brahman. The big Self is indeed no small ego, and thus, to the extent you are stuck in your small ego, a death and transcendence is required. Narcissists are simply people whose egos are not yet big enough to embrace the entire Kosmos, and so they try to be central to the Kosmos instead. But we do not want our sages to have big egos; we do not even want them to display a manifest dimension at all. Anytime a sage displays humanness in regard to money, food, sex, relationships we are shocked, shocked, because we are planning to escape life altogether, not live it, and the sage who lives life offends us. We want out, we want to ascend, we want to escape, and the sage who engages life with gusto, lives it to the hilt, grabs each wave of life and surfs it to the end this deeply, profoundly disturbs us, frightens us, because it means that we, too, might have to engage life, with gusto, on all levels, and not merely escape it in a cloud of luminous ether. We do not want our sages to have bodies, egos, drives, vitality, sex, money, relationships, or life, because those are what habitually torture us, and we want out. We do not want to surf the waves of life, we want the waves to go away. We want vaporware spirituality. The integral sage, the nondual sage, is here to show us otherwise. Known generally as tantric, these sages insist on transcending life by living it. They insist on finding release by engagement, finding nirvana in the midst of samsara, finding total liberation by complete immersion. They enter with awareness the nine rings of hell, for nowhere else are the nine heavens found. Nothing is alien to them, for there is nothing that is not One Taste. Indeed, the whole point is to be fully at home in the body and its desires, the mind and its ideas, the spirit and its light. To embrace them fully, evenly, simultaneously, since all are equally gestures of the One and Only Taste. To inhabit lust and watch it play; to enter ideas and follow their brilliance; to be swallowed by Spirit and awaken to a glory that time forgot to name. Body and mind and spirit, all contained, equally contained, in the ever-present awareness that grounds the entire display. In the stillness of the night, the Goddess whispers. In the brightness of the day, dear God roars. Life pulses, mind imagines, emotions wave, thoughts wander. What are all these but the endless movements of One Taste, forever at play with its own gestures, whispering quietly to all who would listen: is this not you yourself? When the thunder roars, do you not hear your Self? When the lightning cracks, do you not see your Self? When clouds float quietly across the sky, is this not your very own limitless Being, waving back at you? Mentioning that there are crocodiles in the River

I finally managed to obtain 100mg of 5-MeO-DMT, but it's not as reality shattering as I expected it to be, maybe I'm just not dosing it right... 5mg Boof: nothing much, except the burn up my ass and the wall texture looking a bit sharper 10mg Boof: feel like I'm dozing off, I lie down, feel very overwhelmed, but I find a trick, I just empty my mind and feel fine 20mg Boof: feel overwhelmed, then empty my mind, then just feel light headed, everything looks normal, reflections are more noticeable 6mg Smoked: stronger than boofing, shorter though, manageable, nothing special 12mg Smoked in three hits: stronger effect, noticeable body load, chest feels softer, but I easily keep all the context in the background Had few more trials with similar results, am left with 10mg. What it taught me: to let go of the monkey chatter brain, but that's kind of it. I had profound experiences with other psychedelics though: 75g of truffles: disintegrating, immense organic worlds, speedrun personal meaning, visualize and annihilate ego distractions, become nothing 300mg of lsd: with chanting and great effort I stabilize vision into a fractal pattern and barely glimpse what others call a dmt entity ketamine + 4-aco-det + 5-meo-mipt: feels like kundalini release, my voice becomes untampered, I feel authentically myself for the first time in my life, I face the fear of solipsism and loneliness, maintaining and integrating the level of overstimulation I feel I feel like some of the experiences I wound have had on 5-meo or n,n I experienced through taking the equivalent of 15g of shrooms. I also had many more hyper-heroic dose experiences that left me lying down for hours disoriented and overstimulated. By now I learned the actual feeling of resistance thanks to actual 5-meo and wonder how far I can now push it. But then again, I feel like if I don't focus on anything, there's no trip, if I just lie down and wait, not much happens, maybe that's the point, there's nothing and I set the objective, though I would really like to see some aliens and spirits that I don't have to intently focus into existence in a way that's indistinguishable from impressioned intentful daydreaming, even in my largest trips, it always felt like I was doing the imagining and it was a conscious effort, I really just wanted to be taken away by the experience without having to imagine it myself. At the same time, I got many really weird ideas and vibes that I would not have come up with by myself, so maybe that process of receiving these ideas and directions is exactly the thing outside of myself that I am looking for. It's just kind of anti-climactic having to visualize it all myself, I feel like I only get vibes and ideas, while others describe getting whole video-streams through automatic open and closed eye visuals. I don't think I've ever gotten open eye visuals except becoming aware of the innate details of my environment or the floor looking and feeling uneven or leaf dense trees looking fractalized when staring at them for long, or the shape of the spacing between their branches giving me alien vibes, or multiple trees when focused upon looking like they're made of humans in different poses forming a type of spheroid arena around me with a 50m radius. Where I'm at right now: I realized today that the perceiver is nothing, since every thing is perceived and by virtue of being perceivable is not the perceiver itself. Maybe there isn't even a perceiver but don't push me, I don't feel it yet, I move my hand and feel the intentionality. Yet there is no seeing, just sight, no hearing, just sound, no being aware, just awareness being itself and somehow all linked by consciousness, some kind of aether substrate of it all. Where is the feeling of I/me? What is it even? I'm still figuring that out, got any good guiding questions? I often feel inhabited by spirits or energies but feel like I need to put in energy to express it all and so the distinction between them and me is unclear, getting a feed of visuals sure would be easier but that only happened once with closed eyes. Even on 20x salvia, plants start looking extra 3d and have copper like metalic texture but no actual weird visuals, I feel super light and energized and am compelled to walk like a funky egyptian, I get thoughts like "just remember, if a tiger attacks you, it's probably not real" and I feel strong deja-vu but no actual concrete visuals, like I'm given vague impressions and have to create a script or play based of them myself, really anti-climactic. Oh, and dissociatives make my body completely relaxed and I feel like I'm made of rubber and my mind also takes on elastic properties and my intuition is supercharged, I can instantly learn new concepts effectively and all videos I look at look like they're really dumb, the people in them sound like 3rd graders and I can instantly filter out the messages and intents and just "get it". Doing things feels simpler, I set the intent and my body and mind work on their own, it's like the ego was actually an obstruction that creates confusion and drama and without it I can just innately get things, figure them out and do them and everything seems so easy like I'm the one overcomplicating it. High doses make render me unfunctional though, until the come down which is amazing. I also tried HHC edibles to see what happens, they brought out anxiety from my childhood, I remembered a lot of things I left behind and wanted to forget, it made me glad because I wondered what I've been doing all my life feeling insecure in my current self and now I became conscious of what that was, all the trauma I went through and know the answer. Ever since it's just disorienting though. CBD is relaxing but kind of weak, I might have to judge it in context as a combo with psychedelics. TLDR; 5-meo didn't affect me as much as I thought, should just have boofed it all at once, but in retrospect other trips might have had a similar quality and I'm really just jealous of everyone else auto open-eye visual hallucinating cool things into existence.

@Leo Gura I've really contemplated it through and it feels intuitively wrong. That's not how reality works in my experience, every cut into infinity must present its lights and shadows. I'm sure there are Infinite states of consciousness that are totally innaccessible through Psychedelics, maybe entheogens can't trigger some receptors, or another unknown methodology is necessary like DNA modification or who knows what, hope you get the metapoint beyond the examples. What I'm trying to say is that Psychedelics surely present access to many infinite and Godly states but not to All infinite and Godly states, making that assumptions is what feels intuitively wrong. If someone wants to become as conscious, as infinite and as Godly as existentially possible I cannot assume that Psychedelics will grant me access to all such states and that most certainly other methodologies can present new infinite and unique states, totally orthogonal and alien to those generated by Psychedelics. In my opinion, this is a more epistemically secure position to work from a priori. So when exploring consciousness I should be open-minded regarding all facets that are presented to me and make sure to get the fundamentals of each one. Instead of using psychedelics as a depth-first search for those facets that I'm biased towards, they should be used to look even with greater emphasis to those places where I don't wanna look. Yes, I think I've fallen into that trap myself. I sometimes feel consciousness is like a cheese, and then we make little holes while exploring it, psychedelics being this digging machine I now can see how they might be used to explore those channels that I'm biased towards and get a skewed perspective of the whole cheese. How important do you think trying a wide variety of psychedelics is? I get it's important but I would like to get a bit more on this. Because honestly I loved to try and explore different substances but since I've discovered the 5meos I've been quite disillusioned with other psychedelics all together. Maybe I should get back with exploring, do you think you could share with us a more in depth list of research chemicals that you have found useful? I know you have done a lot of experimentation on your side and you could save me years of trial and error. I'll reinvent the wheel anyway but hey I wanted to give it a shoot in case it never crossed your mind. I'm sure you could add a lot of value to the Psychonaut endeavour with such list. So is an excessive desire to make sense of psychedelic experiences a trap? Maybe it's better to consciously feel and be with the experience, before rushing into cartographic activity. Mmm, it's true that the passion psychedelics experiences and insights have, can actually bypass some epistemic filters, the beauty and profundity can be mesmerizing and that can fool me. This is advanced, never thought about it. Usually I'm just delighted, but now I'll take this into consideration without losing my ability to lose myself in that passion. I'll work on striking that balance. I'm a neophyte in God-Realization.

Well, in that usage I meant separate-self with ego. But ego is also the functional unit of the human. And if its transcended and no longer separate, its all nice and well: The Meaning of Egolessness – Ken Wilber, One Taste Precisely because the ego, the soul and the Self can all be present simultaneously, we can better understand the real meaning of egolessness,a notion that has caused an inordinate amount of confusion. But egolessness does not mean the absence of a functional self (that’s a psychotic, not a sage); it means that one is no longer exclusively identified with that self. One of the many reasons we have trouble with the notion of egoless is that people want their egoless sages to fulfill all their fantasies of saintly or spiritual, which usually means dead from the neck down, without fleshy wants or desires, gently smiling all the time. All of the things that people typically have trouble with money, food, sex, relationships, desire they want their saints to be without. Egoless sages who are above all that is what people want. Talking heads is what they want. Religion, they believe, will simply get rid of all baser instincts, drives and relationships, and hence they look to religion, not for advice on how to live life with enthusiasm, but on how to avoid it, repress it, deny it, escape it. In other words, the typical person wants the spiritual sage to be less than a person, somehow devoid of all the messy, juicy, complex, pulsating, desiring, urging forces that drive most human beings. We expect our sages to be an absence of all that drives us! All the things that frighten us, confuse us, torment us, confound us: we want our sages to be untouched by them altogether. And that absence, that vacancy, that less than personal, is what we often mean by egoless. But egoless does not mean less than personal, it means more than personal. Not personal minus, but personal plus all the normal personal qualities, plus some transpersonal ones. Think of the great yogis, saints and sages from Moses to Christ to Padmasambhava. They were not feeble-mannered milquetoasts, but fierce movers and shakers from bullwhips in the Temple to subduing entire countries. They rattled the world on its own terms, not in some pie-in-the-sky piety; many of them instigated massive social revolutions that have continued for thousands of years. And they did so not because they avoided the physical, emotional and mental dimensions of humanness and the ego that is their vehicle, but because they engaged them with a drive and intensity that shook the world to its very foundations. No doubt, they were also plugged into the soul (deeper psychic) and spirit (formless Self) the ultimate source of their power but they expressed that power, and gave it concrete results, precisely because they dramatically engaged the lower dimensions through which that power could speak in terms that could be heard by all. These great movers and shakers were not small egos; they were, in the very best sense of the term, big egos, precisely because the ego (the functional vehicle of the gross realm) can and does exist alongside the soul (the vehicle of the subtle) and the Self (vehicle of the causal). To the extent these great teachers moved the gross realm, they did so with their egos, because the ego is the functional vehicle of that realm. They were not, however, identified merely with their egos (that’s a narcissist), they simply found their egos plugged into a radiant Kosmic source. The great yogis, saints and sages accomplished so much precisely because they were not timid little toadies but great big egos, plugged into the dynamic Ground and Goal of the Kosmos itself, plugged into their own higher Self, alive to the pure atman (the pure I–I) that is one with Brahman; they opened their mouths and the world trembled, fell to its knees, and confronted its radiant God. Saint Teresa was a great contemplative? Yes, and Saint Teresa is the only woman ever to have reformed an entire Catholic monastic tradition (think about it). Gautama Buddha shook India to its foundations. Rumi, Plotinus, Bodhidharma, Lady Tsogyal, Lao Tzu, Plato, the Bal Shem Tov these men and women started revolutions in the gross realm that lasted hundreds, sometimes thousands, of years, something neither Marx nor Lenin nor Locke nor Jefferson can yet claim. And they did not do so because they were dead from the neck down. No, they were monumentally, gloriously, divinely big egos, plugged into a deeper psychic, which was plugged straight into God. There is certainly a type of truth to the notion of transcending ego : it doesn’t mean destroy the ego, it means plug it into something bigger. (As Nagarjuna put it, in the relative world, atman is real; in the absolute, neither atman nor anatman is real. Thus, in neither case is anatta a correct description of reality.) The small ego does not evaporate; it remains as the functional center of activity in the conventional realm. As I said, to lose that ego is to become a psychotic, not a sage. Transcending the ego thus actually means to transcend but include the ego in a deeper and higher embrace, first in the soul or deeper psychic, then with the Witness or primordial Self, then with each previous stage taken up, enfolded, included and embraced in the radiance of One Taste. And that means we do not get rid of the small ego, but rather, we inhabit it fully, live it with verve, use it as the necessary vehicle through which higher truths are communicated. Soul and Spirit include body, emotions and mind; they do not erase them. Put bluntly, the ego is not an obstruction to Spirit, but a radiant manifestation of Spirit. All Forms are not other than Emptiness, including the form of the ego. It is not necessary to get rid of the ego, but simply to live it with a certain exuberance. When identification spills out of the ego and into the Kosmos at large, the ego discovers that the individual atman is in fact all of a piece with Brahman. The big Self is indeed no small ego, and thus, to the extent you are stuck in your small ego, a death and transcendence is required. Narcissists are simply people whose egos are not yet big enough to embrace the entire Kosmos, and so they try to be central to the Kosmos instead. But we do not want our sages to have big egos; we do not even want them to display a manifest dimension at all. Anytime a sage displays humanness in regard to money, food, sex, relationships we are shocked, shocked, because we are planning to escape life altogether, not live it, and the sage who lives life offends us. We want out, we want to ascend, we want to escape, and the sage who engages life with gusto, lives it to the hilt, grabs each wave of life and surfs it to the end this deeply, profoundly disturbs us, frightens us, because it means that we, too, might have to engage life, with gusto, on all levels, and not merely escape it in a cloud of luminous ether. We do not want our sages to have bodies, egos, drives, vitality, sex, money, relationships, or life, because those are what habitually torture us, and we want out. We do not want to surf the waves of life, we want the waves to go away. We want vaporware spirituality. The integral sage, the nondual sage, is here to show us otherwise. Known generally as tantric, these sages insist on transcending life by living it. They insist on finding release by engagement, finding nirvana in the midst of samsara, finding total liberation by complete immersion. They enter with awareness the nine rings of hell, for nowhere else are the nine heavens found. Nothing is alien to them, for there is nothing that is not One Taste. Indeed, the whole point is to be fully at home in the body and its desires, the mind and its ideas, the spirit and its light. To embrace them fully, evenly, simultaneously, since all are equally gestures of the One and Only Taste. To inhabit lust and watch it play; to enter ideas and follow their brilliance; to be swallowed by Spirit and awaken to a glory that time forgot to name. Body and mind and spirit, all contained, equally contained, in the ever-present awareness that grounds the entire display. In the stillness of the night, the Goddess whispers. In the brightness of the day, dear God roars. Life pulses, mind imagines, emotions wave, thoughts wander. What are all these but the endless movements of One Taste, forever at play with its own gestures, whispering quietly to all who would listen: is this not you yourself? When the thunder roars, do you not hear your Self? When the lightning cracks, do you not see your Self? When clouds float quietly across the sky, is this not your very own limitless Being, waving back at you? Just a metaphor used in this little Lèse-majesté Sorry, was a bit unprecise in recycling that metaphor. Selling Water by Crocodile-River

Or maybe you have not passed the Gateless Gate. Not big enough for the remains of the frog , even though in your case, they are quite thinned out thanks to some, ummm, substances, contemplation and meditation. But alas, even an Camel Alien can't pass the eye of a needle. Same with the Gateless Gate. Also ET needs the Mixer in order to have stable nondual Infinite Awakening sobre in daily life. And https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neti_neti is the mixer. Not this Alien, not that Alien. All the psychedelic states and insights, however high in manifestation & understanding & insight & Alien & whatever n+1, are just appearances. Temporary, just appearing, not constant, all disappearing again, just imagined, rolling "before" your True Being like a show. Just like life, dream, deep sleep, death, Astral, Bardo, Alien, God, Demon, n+1, or whatever other show consciousness lets appear later in... Infinite Being. You intuit that already. And after the Alien and whatever infinitely consciousness understanding n+1, "death" can wipe the slate clean. Infinite Being forgets (or rather doesn't let the memory-appearances arise again, and then throws itself out again on its own breadcrumb trail back home. Just for the fun of it). Until the resistance against that simple fact is dead & transcended in real time, the mixer is indicated. Luckily, nowadays they make Youtube-videos on how to avoid such traps. Uhuh, Water by the River now really has smiled at a very intelligent crocodile in the River Luckily, "he" is also all crocodiles, including the crocodile now probably smiling really hungrily at him. But luckily, that specific crocodile has enough smartness to enable the potential for some humour. PS: No non-existing-just-appearing aliens were harmed while filming the appearing movie with the mixer. And no self-existing separate (but instead just appearing) beings claiming Godrealizations have really been gaslit. Infinite Being just goes on being... Infinite. Eternal. Unchanging. Unharmed. In eternal silence & peace. And can neither be "mixered" nor "gaslit". Selling dumb ideas, like mixers for crocodiles or Aliens by the River

Weed addiction To raise my self esteem To stop being ambivalent To kill my self To have profound insights To stop existing To experience another dimension To have a separate personality To take ownership To stop being ambivalent To do something productive To be creative To write To go for the things I want To feel like a god To become god To merge with infinite consciousness To live in a privately defined world Cons Ending up in hell Solipsism Telepathy Thought broadcasting Feeling like god around others Alien hell , telepathic meaaages They Know Paranoid delusions Being torn apart by infinite information Nodes of consciousness overwhelm all my senses and I become omniscient toward human beings connecting to a telepathic superhighway