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@Adamq8 Nice reference to Donald Hoffman. I enjoy his speeches. I think though that with many teachers, what makes the idea inaccessible to "hardnosed scientific" type people, is that they say experience only has correlation in physical matter in a way that makes it seem like they're implying physical matter has no bearing at all on experience. I don't think you need to deny the science of the external world or neuroscience etc. for nonduality to be true. In fact, because this "dream" (the universe) IS God, science is perhaps one of the most divine practices of all alongside meditation, as exploration of the science of this universe is very literally an exploration of God, since God IS it. I do not see any issue if the brain does in fact control what this "localized form" experiences. I do not see that it is any issue whatsoever or that it is contrary to nonduality in any way. Matter is made of consciousness, the brain is simply millions of years of evolution constructing a sort of superorganism where millions of points of experience work as one unit. There isn't a combination problem because the little points of experience don't vanish... The combination problem is like hypothesizing that animals like horses are just one single giant cell. In reality, it is millions of cells, none of the smaller cells vanish when they come together as that horse. Not only do I think it's possible, I think it is FACTUAL. I think most robots are conscious. Think of this... If there is a little robot vacuum cleaner, it moves around on wheels and has a laser sensor that detects when there is an object ahead so that it can turn. When that laser detects a wall and sends a signal to the robot's chip, it turns. Why? Because it is AWARE that there is a wall ahead. It has KNOWLEDGE that a wall is ahead. If there was zero awareness that a wall is ahead, it wouldn't turn it would just run straight into it because it doesn't know the wall is there. Because it is so alien to us this is almost impossible to understand, but I do not see how it could be any other way. By dictionary definition, that little robot is displaying an act of awareness. How could it not be? So inside that robot there is a localized form of consciousness. When the robot is turned off, the localization is no more, like a whirpool in a river (whirpools being localized in the stream) going away leaving just river. When our brains are turned off, the localization is no more. Consciousness and qualia all exist inside God which is "nothingness" and the "place" where things go when there is nothing to experience them like the example of red.

It can't be impossible to reconcile the two things. The relative experience of anaesthesia etc is cessation/nothingness. Cessation doesn't mean it stops existing. The states mentioned are still full of human things, not suddenly sonar vision like a bat and so on. I think the Absolute is nothingness. Pure infinite consciousness is totally nondual, no experience exists here, nor time, nor anything. Nothingness = everythingness. Go to the big bang. From say a void perspective there is no experience of anything. But this is happening. When experience happens the "experiencer" appears. I think someone very recently said, when experience stops the experiencer ceases too, and pure consciousness is something deeper than that. When there is experience then, is it just tapping into some of the infinite qualia already present? So possibly nothing in the entire universe rn can see an infinite myriad of colors which DO exist but can't currently be experienced... that we just see as a certain shade of blue or w.e. In a dream, as soon as you see anything you are localized somewhere in the dream. It is impossible to experience a dream without duality being created. With legit full nonduality there is cessation/nothingness/the void. What is the existence of things prior to subjective experience like. When consciousness is still 100% nondual. There is no way that these things are mutually exclusive.

Below is the third excerpt out of 12 about reification. Not to be confused with Californication. Just joking,,,, link at the bottom. Mind's Tendency to Reify As we look closer at these subtle ego activities, we discover the tendency to reify reification itself and make it a kind of object to reject. In our minds, we make it something from which we can push away and separate ourselves. The same process can happen as we reify doing, making it something to reject or judge. Even more subtle than that—we can reify nondoing, such that nondoing becomes an object, a thing we can value or cultivate. The truth is that nondoing is really nothing. No such thing exists that is called nondoing. Nondoing is the nonexistence of doing, but we make it something to aspire to, which can become a subtle obstacle. Something similar can happen to those who work exclusively with a nondual perspective about reality: at some point, they begin to reify nonduality, and it becomes for them an objective to aspire to and reach. So, as you see, the tendency of the mind to reify in order to create stability, a fixed center, or a particular orientation is unlimited. The mind, then, is a mixed blessing, a double-edged sword. And that is the condition of humanity: Our intelligence, our mind, can liberate us but it can also ensnare us. Our learning, our maturation, and even our realization and enlightenment, require the capacity for discernment, for clear discrimination, of what is true and what is not true. The Unfolding Now, pg. 188 Taken from: https://www.diamondapproach.org/glossary/refinery_phrases/reification

I called SOLIPSISM a belief. Read the thread. Even my original post I specifically called the fact that there is only you a truth. YOU are interpreting it as solipsism. I am not proposing solipsism, I am proposing nonduality. Truth = Zero, Nothingness, Consciousness, Magic.

That is, the explanation for qualia (the redness of red etc). Clearly this is a harder problem for materialism, but it is also the case with nonduality/idealism. Why does red look red and not blue for example? Why is green not yellow and yellow not green? How and why is our brain tapping into this world of colour? Are there infinite more colours available? I assume there must be. Why don't we see those? Does any living thing?

@dflores321 There's nothing wrong with it, it just is. No, this community has shown itself to be clearly against such a thing. But honestly I expect this community (or rather, the wider nonduality community) to produce at least one offshoot which holds abandoning the dream via physical death to be the highest aim, and it wouldn't be the world's first death cult by a long shot.

I believe every post or insight containing the word nothingness would help the collective consciousness more if replaced by the word "everythingness". Doesnt eveythingness have a better ring to it? If we are to awaken the world, I think everythingness is an easier bus to jump into for the masses or anyone inexperienced with nonduality. Do you believe the quality of the mystical teachings would be any lesser if I replace every instance in existence of the word nothingness to ----> everythingness? I may be wrong, so I welcome any discussion.

Disclaimer: All of the previous insights were just a shadow of what's possible. But, of course, the path was true. So, by investigating Dzogchen and practicing Trekcho and Togal, realizations came. The most fundamental and mind-bending ones are: - Suchness/Absolute Truth - Non-differentiation - Nonduality - Imaginary, dream-like nature of reality/Emptiness of phenomena - Reality being fully constructed by Divine force/Infinite Intelligence, right now - You are Alone Thanks to Leo's videos and conceptual framework built over watching them for couple of years, these facets have presented themselves as obvious aspects of Suchness and Emptiness. When this is realized, it is such a staggering amount of Freedom that you can do and are open to literally everything. Resistance fades away, leaving you Open and Free. Physical reality, fears, desires and egoic cravings fade away. Suchness permeates every experience, and by knowing it you no longer try to control everything, make everything as you wish, identify with thoughts as though they are you and they control what happens. The Aloneness insight has been the most difficult yet. It is utterly unbelievable and shocking. You are literally Alone, as God. Considering the process: - There is always something more, something deeper. Integrating the insights and deepening them is a work of lifetime. - By trying to grasp nonduality or trying to force it, you lose it. By letting go, relaxing and opening up, it reveals itself. - Insight into Absolute does not extinguish the Relative. In fact, Absolute contains Relative. The process of coalescing them is a work of lifetime. 30 Facets of Enlightenment are very relevant here, because this video shows that there is more to the work than merely realizing nonduality and Suchness. There is a whole bunch of facets which can be known after, and the whole process of integrating these insights into daily life. And, in a sense, Suchness has always been the case, so the goal of Enlightenment is to simply *being where you already are*. But you have to recognize that which is always present, regardless of the state you're in and what phenomena you are experiencing. Feelings: Frankly, this has been so radical that it blew my mind out of existence. Suddenly, it all made sense! This is the way things truly are. This has been the most real thing I've experienced yet. Next steps: - Integrating these insights into daily life, sustaining Presence and merging the Absolite with the Relative. I started to notice when the Presence is lost, and in these times ego takes over. The goal is to sustain presense in all circumstances. - Dream Yoga by means of WILD - Reading teachings and practicing to open up more of reality, deeper.

? agreed It's been said that a good clear understanding of Adviata or Nonduality firstly can lead to a better understanding of no creation, nothingness or Ajata in the latter. Robert Wolfe has some incredible essays in this area on his AjataSunyata Project website. ❤

There is no such thing as a conscious process at the deepest levels of this. You’re letting the continuity bias of the waking state/dreams give you a human body and feeling of a center of experience. Your interpretations label things as “conscious,” a “process,” etc. At the end of the day, even consciousness as a label must fall. This should typically be done once you have some true and deep no-mind and No-Self awakenings. You can literally run on autopilot without conscious control. Why would others require it? There’s no self here. Why would there be other selves? Now this is precisely where Leo makes his leap to solipsism based on having no direct conscious experience of something outside his consciousness. Leo is basically saying, or should be saying, that the mechanics of consciousness do not all for “two consciousnesses” to be experienced at once in one person’s consciousness — it’s a tautology. As soon as you become aware of an “other” consciousness, it has precisely been assimilated into your completely nondual and boundary-less existence at that very moment. The fact that nonduality is real — if you take this as a given, it’s up to you on that — means that anything to ever come into your consciousness is You. This is a problem of verification being shielded from possibility due to definitions and tautology of consciousness always being one “field.”

The subconscious is a conscious mind that the regular self can't access directly. The fact there are multiple conscious minds in their own mind proves that it's possible for there to be an inaccessible conscious process. Our selves to them are inaccessible conscious processes (they are not consciously controlling our words) just like what they call their subconscious. No space means the physical distance between our selves and their mind is 0 and equal to the distance between their conscious and subconscious (also 0). Dream characters have autonomy from the conscious dreamer unless the dreamer becomes lucid. The sub is acting autonomously and it is conscious and has knowledge. So do others. So the others have a conscious process and autonomy. This is the distinction between solipsism and nonduality because both propose one mind. Solipsists believe their own conscious relative self-mind is all that exists but because of the subconscious it evidently isn't. If you accept the subconscious exists you have to accept "other" minds.

I always thought that when nonduality speakers said stuff similar to this, it wasn't quite as simple as they describe -- I just thought they couldn't articulate the unspeakable. I can't remember exactly what I'm referring to, but in any case, as far as what I've said here? It is literally, exactly as simple as I describe. You simply don't want this liberation, and that itself, clearly is still liberation! So this is literally exactly what is most wanted (longed for but with no one longing), it's just that, if there is experience, there will necessarily be an experience of wanting something else -- you could say this is because what is wanted (or longed for)... is the experience of wanting something else! And even if that “something else” is simply a future that’s the same as the apparent present. It's that simple!

Nonduality is not a state. All states are relative. Sober or not itself is relative. No duality cannot nor will ever be an experience, much less a drug induced one.

Im not even saying he wasn't perfect, it is perfectly normal in my opinion, to feel forsaken if this happens to you. The thing is most of us are doing armchair philosophy which is easy. Oh yeah I am not the body etc etc., but if reality conspires to check that for real, you might be put in situation where you, from your direct experience as a human can be tortured... It wouldn't feel like all is good at that point, it would feel like there is some force there which is guided by dark/evil spirits. There are many different spirits that exist and we need to be conscious of which one we let work through us. We are all innocent, it is the spirits we let in that can mud things up... Here comes the importance of that mind dressage (ox herding) I guess. The oxes are going to be beast natured and wild, unless we apply spiritual wisdom on our ox but also on other oxes around us! If you make your ox "enlightened" or domesticated, and it is surrounded by wild oxes, the wild ones are likely to destroy the "domesticated" one... Unless most are domesticated and only few are wild, then we have a problem! That's why I think religion is a positive, as it usually anchors the spirit of Love in the reader/user and not evil-doing. But now if we dont even acknowledge there is Spirit of evil going around the world, how are we going to tackle it? There is so much qualitative difference between spirit of evil and spirit of Love. I believe its good to be mindful of that, and not just close our eyes for the injustices of the world and the preventable evil. Here is a poker analogy to support my post (even though I dont like playing it): In poker you can win or you can lose. Both whether you win or you lose, you are playing poker (nonduality) but there is a qualitative difference- a REAL difference between whether you are winning or you are losing. But either way, you're playing, right? That doesn't mean its all the same. The result , the fruit, is important. Not all trees bear good fruit. Some trees require help to produce better fruits. We cant do that if we say the rotten fruit is Good.

But i wouldn't be sure about that last statement. Im pretty sure enlightened can view some as fools, even if knowing something deeper. Might even see his own "guy self" like fool too ? But you say you're not enlightened so maybe there are different ways those foolish bodymindspirit complexes can be pushed on the right path rather than just spiral into their delusions further. I don't subscribe to "all is well". If someone starts torturing your bodymindspirit even the most enlightened will start to question the sanity of some aspects of the absolute. It's not all well at all! When Jesus was on the cross, he questioned for a moment, why has God forsaken him... And I do have a direct experience and know the difference between someone being intentionally mean in order to hurt (satan) and those who are true to the spirit of Peace and Love (God) . I do not believe in nonduality. I actually intuited my friend had a connection with this evil spirit before he exploded. It was like a presence.. Knowing its presence could have been what triggered it. It likes to be hidden. Eckhart is on point with the pain body thing, he is exposing satan to the Light of consciousness and Love.

So here are my proposals: (all of these channels have >50.000 viewers, interviews > 1hr, with at least several videos about topics like mysticism, psychedlics, epistemology, awakening, nonduality): https://www.youtube.com/c/TheoriesofEverything/videos https://www.youtube.com/user/conscioustv/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/NewThinkingAllowed/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/RebelWisdom/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/scienceandnonduality/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/AubreyMarcusPod/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/SimulationSeries/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/CloserToTruthTV/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/timferriss/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/metaRising/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/SpiritualawakeningNetplus/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/AaronAbke/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/lexfridman/videos Do not exactly fit the above criteria but could be worth a try maybe: https://www.youtube.com/c/MindvalleyTalks/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/CosmicSkeptic/videos (connor murphy-vaccinated ) https://www.youtube.com/c/TomBilyeu/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/higherbalance/videos https://www.youtube.com/user/ThinkingAllowedTV/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/VishuddhaDas/videos German channels with >50.000 viewers which talk about psychedelics+nonduality+mysticism who almost definitely would love to have a conversation/an interview with you (in english of course): https://www.youtube.com/c/GreenRabbitMindbuilding/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/FlowFinder/videos (-> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5iZWwe0PfQ (proof video: ayahusca and nodnual insights)) https://www.youtube.com/c/highermind/videos other (niche) channels (well researched and high quality) not relating to your orignal question but which are a great source of wisdom and maybe unknown to you: https://www.youtube.com/c/AndrewHubermanLab/videos https://www.youtube.com/c/academyofideas/videos https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC49qAywwrDrLNDgQEe3vYuA/videos

How so? Well, I was at the point in my spiritual journey where I felt total and complete self-love. I believe it was this that allowed me to realize no self and oneness. I had a peak into Truth in these moments and it would come and go throughout my days. And like you said in one of your videos, once you have one of these experiences you start to get really serious about this work. That is exactly what happened to me. I started to get very serious about this work so I branched out towards studying other teachings (before, I had ONLY followed Leo). Then, I got introduced to Teal and it put me back into victimhood, blaming, judgment. It made me believe that I had more work to do on my emotional body and that I wasn't fully integrated so I needed emotional healing. And so I say it "fucked me up" because now I am just so absorbed in my past, thoughts, experiences, that I have lost touch with Truth. I can find Truth when I want but my focus is on reintegration instead of just Being/Truth. It's hard for me to know, is this what I need? Emotional integration? Or, is it because I was fully integrated in the first place that I was even able to reach self-love and thus, my nondual and no self realizations. When Teal talks about 'False Self' I think, hm. Was my self-love a false self? She talks about fragmentation which makes me feel only one aspect of myself realized Truth but I have other aspects of myself that haven't. She also talks a lot about shadow work so I think I have a lot more shadow work to do. I really don't want to discount how far I came in realizing self-love, no self, nonduality. But I also feel that regression is sometimes necessary for fuller or 'integrated' progression. I should also put that my mom has a false self. She thinks she has self-love but she's still at a very low vibration. So this is what is scaring me into believing that I too, am like my mom. And deceived myself into self-love. But my self-love was so empowering. The moments I felt it, it was like I didn't need anything else in the world ever because I could give it to myself. I also was inspired to give it to others and help them get it themselves.

Your radical spiritual Truths will likely have a small effect on helping people to awaken on your Facebook. Bottom line — it’s your social media. You want to express yourself. I say just fucking do it. You can hide your true self from your social media if you want, but this only adds to the esotericism, stigma, etc. If you’re doing covert-ops nonduality practice and no one knows that it’s one of your main passions, it just seems like a double loss. They don’t see the true you, you don’t express yourself, and they have less of a chance of being exposed to Truth which their soul is certainly searching for at some level. You might plant the seed in someone’s mind which leads them to dig deeper and discover themselves as Infinity, Love, etc. I used to post to Facebook 40 times a day during manic episodes in straight up Connor Murphy fashion. You know what that did? The people who didn’t matter much in my life are gone (and that includes some old close friends who weren’t right for me and I was no longer right for them), and now I have people who truly support me as who I spend my time talking to. You can dance perfectly for fake people who could give a rat’s ass about yourself by hiding what you want to post and who you are, or you could just express yourself as you wish. I know what I prefer.

I know much of what the OP is talking about. People getting into petty corrections such as “but there is no I. Who is this I?” far too often when both parties already fully well understand this aspect of Nonduality. It’s a fruitless nondual pissing contest which usually goes nowhere or is simply a waste of time compared to the rest of the discussion. My criticism is that people need to be clear when they are using common words in specified ways. The example of Leo with the word omniscience comes to mind. If you have a very nuanced meaning for a word which is quite different from accepted definitions and connotations, it’s only counterproductive to write without clarifying your personal meaning for the word at least a little bit.

BACKGROUND: The main breakthrough trip to be described happened almost exactly two years ago. The experience happened around 11:30 pm on the final night of a 3-day music festival. I was at the festival with a group of friends and my girlfriend at the time. The trip was primarily triggered by a large dose of MDA ("Sass") - I estimate the dose to be 0.7g, but this is a rough estimate. My girlfriend (trip partner) and I had taken MDA in the past, in lighter doses, and never had anything like this happen before. While we always test our substances, the test kits are only so specific. The MDA we took tested dark blue/purple on a Marquis Reagent test kit and was from a trusted source. To this day I don't know how to process the experience and what to believe. Leo's videos have taught me vigilance over the irrationality of the mind and its tendency to delude itself. My experience has been decidedly different than what I hear from Leo and others during their awakenings, which makes it difficult to analyze and understand. I'm posting my objective experience for a few reasons: a) to get my words out and organize my thoughts, b) to see if others can relate or help me understand, and c) to get an outside perspective to see if I am deluding myself and to what degree. NOTE 1: At the time of this experience I had been following Leo's videos intently for about 3 years, and at the time I felt somewhat metaphysically unstable. Leo was starting to push hard into nonduality and my ego felt wounded and afraid from those videos. I have dealt with persistent existential anxiety throughout my life, and this was the period when I struggled the most with it. (I'm doing better now.) NOTE 2: I also think Ketamine played a role in the experience, but to a minor degree. The doses of Ketamine I took that weekend and around the peak experience were small. NOTE 3: I had been partying all weekend leading up to this experience, so my brain could have been exhausted. Given all the variables, I cannot be sure exactly what triggered it. DOSAGES: My best estimates of my substance intake for the weekend are as follows. The breakthrough experience happened on Night 3. Night 1 - substances were taken over time at a steady pace from 4pm-4am period unless otherwise noted: Alcohol - ~8 shots of liquor & ~12 high-percentage beers Ketamine - ~0.4g (insufflated) Cocaine - ~0.7g (insufflated) Nitrous Oxide - 1 balloon (taken in one sitting around 1:00 am) - (inhaled) Night 2 - substances were taken over time at a steady pace from 4pm-4am unless otherwise noted: Alcohol - ~8 shots of liquor & ~12 high-percentage beers Ketamine - ~0.4g (insufflated) Cocaine - ~0.7g (insufflated) Nitrous Oxide - 1 balloon (taken in one sitting around 1:00 am) - (inhaled) MDMA - 0.3g (taken all at once at 12:00 am) - (oral) LSD - 1/3 tab (taken at 9:00 pm) - (oral) Night 3 - substances were taken over time at a steady pace from 4pm-4am unless otherwise noted: Alcohol - ~8 shots of liquor & ~12 high-percentage beers Ketamine - ~0.4g (insufflated) Cocaine - ~0.7g (insufflated) MDA - ~0.7g (taken all at once at 10:00 pm) - (oral) Xanax - 0.5mg (taken during the MDA peak in an attempt to trip cancel) - (oral) My girlfriend and I took these substances together throughout the weekend and dosed at the same times. We took very similar amounts of each substance, other than her taking a full tab of LSD on Night 2 and a small amount more Ketamine than me throughout the weekend. She also took a tab of LSD on Night 3 with the MDA. I probably drank a little more than her throughout the weekend - everything else was very close in dosage. TELEPATHY: Everything was normal for me during the first 2 days and nights of the festival, other than the onset of what I can only describe as telepathy between my girlfriend and myself. This occurred on 4 separate occasions throughout the weekend, including the main MDA experience on Night 3 when the telepathy peaked. The first night we both bought a balloon each of nitrous oxide and inhaled from them while sitting in chairs near one of the stages. I had this indescribable and certain sense that she and I had somehow merged and were sharing thoughts. I didn't say anything to her about this the first night, as I figured it was just in my head. The next night, again when we each had a balloon of nitrous, the same thing happened again. This time we looked at each other and said, "Did that just happen?" and we both knew what we were talking about. She told me that the exact same thing was happening from her perspective, and that she didn't tell me either the previous night as she thought it was just in her head. THE MAIN EXPERIENCE: On the third night, my girlfriend and I consumed the MDA at our campsite at 10:00 pm. We then walked around the festival grounds looking at vendors and displays. About 75 minutes after ingestion (11:15 pm), we both agreed that we maybe felt a slight euphoria but it was very minor, to the point that we thought the MDA would not work beyond this. We sat down on chairs in front of the main stage to watch music. At some point shortly after, it felt like a switch was hit. The MDA hit like a freight train. We looked at each other and both knew we were really fucked up. We were laughing and in a state of euphoria and everything took on a sort of clownish vibe. We moved away from the crowd to a grassy clearing to the side of the stage to get away from people, which felt appropriate. Shortly after, the telepathy returned, but this time in full force. We were experiencing the same thoughts and memories, and occupying the same physical space. It was like we were seeing through one set of eyes, not looking at each other, but seeing together. My girlfriend began to have an accompanying visual trip (she was also on acid at the time). She had a vision of our merged being in the darkness of the sky. We were mirror images of one being, made of stardust, forming constellations (not any particular constellations). I convinced her to take out her phone so we could write a message to ourselves for the morning as a way to "prove that it happened" and to remember it. I texted to a group chat of myself and her "we are the same being." The best she came up with was "this is fun." Then a second switch was hit and I began to experience infinity. It felt at this point that the telepathy extended to the universe at large. It was like I had merged with the universe and the universe was working as one machine. Everything moved to the beat of the universe. My ego death must have been partial, because I still had a sense of self at times, and I was having severe existential terror. My experience then became of infinite suffering/hell. It is hard to remember the details and harder to explain, but I will try to piece things together. It was as if I knew the answer that I had been seeking for my entire life, the answer to why the universe is here and what it is doing. I have always struggled with reconciling and trusting the "goodness" of the universe, and in this moment, reality (which was me) was perceived to be the worst thing possible. My deepest fear had become true, a fear that on some level I knew I have always struggled with but did not understand the nature of until now. All things were leading to an infinitely worse and worse state, already infinitely terrible, but with an infinite capacity to get progressively worse (essentially the opposite of what Leo has been saying the universe is up to). There was also a sense of ultimate entrapment. The worst possible anything, forever, with no chance of escape. There was also a sense of being absolutely alone, which I believe was an integral part of the horror, but my memory of this aspect is fleeting. In the "real world," this resulted in me rolling around violently on the ground, often running into people, and screaming bloody murder - "OH MY GOD. OH MY FUCKING GOD. NOOO. NOOOOOO." I have never heard my voice sound like that before or since. Side note: the only visual component with any of this for me was at one point physically merging with my girlfriend. There was a black "void" in her chest that was sucking me in. Otherwise everything was fading in-and-out, like I was moving in and out of states of consciousness, so it is hard to recall many details. Then, just as quickly as the suffering phase began, it "resolved" somehow, and was replaced by Love. The magnitude and unlimited potential of suffering inverted 180 degrees and was actualized as Love. This was blissful. The Love phase was decidedly less dramatic, and less convincing. In talking with my girlfriend after the experience, she said she watched me go through at least 10-15 "cycles." In one moment I would either be unresponsive or in agony, and the next moment I would tell her I'm fine and say "Let's go find friends" or something similar. Then the trip would cycle again and I would instantly fall to the ground again completely limp. I believe these fainting cycles matched with my cycling between experiencing suffering and Love. I only remember one true suffering phase and one true Love phase, but I imagine there were more that I don't remember. She tells me it took me a while to come fully out of it the cycling (probably about 30-40 minutes). She did not experience the metaphysical states as I did, but she says she could comprehend what I was going through. FLASHBACKS: From the time of writing this experience, I have had somewhere between 20 and 40 flashbacks of the experience, usually while completely sober. They started shortly after returning home from the festival. They can be very intense, although not as intense as the trip itself was. "Flashback" is the best word I have for them. They feel like the trip activates again and I am back to where I was that night, like reality has again become what it was in those moments. In general, the flashbacks have decreased in intensity and frequency over time. My first 5-10 flashbacks (up to about 4 months after the trip) usually caused me to faint and fall to the ground in the same way that I did during the trip itself. During a flashback I have been on the ground for up to 5 minutes. The fainting is confirmed by those around me; one time I needed to be carried out of a crowd by two friends, and another time I fell down a flight of New York City subway steps and ended up covered in bruises. The flashbacks happen spontaneously, often with no lead up at all. If there is a lead-up, it is usually some rumination over the trip and an increase in existential anxiety. The flashbacks often happen in my dreams, where they are very intense and usually wake me up. A very curious feature of the flashbacks is that every time it happens I feel that I am not "supposed" to talk to anyone about it. In the moment of flashback there is a sense that by talking to other people about it, I am feuling the suffering and somehow spreading it to other people. This has been so convincing at times that I would reflexively push my girlfriend away from me when I am in that state, in an attempt to "protect her" from it. This has prevented me from writing this report, until now. Thank you for reading. Please let me know if you have experienced anything similar or if you have any feedback. Blessings. Age at time of experience: 24

@ivankiss There is no knower from a nondual perspective. Nonduality would mean collapse of knower - known into absolute being. @Mason Riggle so direct experience is only source of knowledge? And you cannot know anything you've not experienced is what you're saying?

When viewed as the other side of the coin as self inquiry, surrender = Ignore and relax all experience/intention/thought except for the experience/intention/thought of ignoring and relaxing all experience/intention/thought. Relax all intention except for the intention to relax all intention. Neither action nor inaction. Then (once Witnessing or at least deep quietude emerges) apply that intention to itself. Ignore even the thought of ignoring thought. Relax even the intention to relax all intention. What is revealed cannot be described. It's not an achievement. It sounds like he's contradicting himself because it's a reflection of nonduality in experience, which isn't real, so paradox is inevitable; action is inaction.

@RMQualtrough Yes. You can't unite anything that wasn't divided in the first place. Even to speak of "cessation" is already saying to much, because cessation implies division. For there to be the sense of "unity" (/nonduality) there must at least be the possibility of the illusion of division (thought). Your feeling of being an individual, of being cut off from the universe, of separation in any way shape or form, that feeling is the exact same as nonduality. There is no difference at all. Precisely because there is no real division, there can exist the illusion of division. You wouldn't know what you meant by "reality" unless you also knew what you meant by "unreality"(/"illusion").

When you become Reality, the manifestation of _____ is endlessly creative. "As individuals, we can have the view of totality only if we have some realization of Total Being, because the view of totality is not simply a mental view but the very openness at the heart of Total Being. We cannot hold or embody the view of totality if our realization is limited to nondual truth, or to unilocal unity, or of course if we have no realization at all. Because Total Being is free to manifest any view, whichever face it presents is what we typically then call reality. We don’t usually know this kind of freedom, we don’t even ordinarily expect it, because most of us are caught in a particular view, and we believe that is the only way reality can be. We mostly live within the dualistic view, until we recognize or realize the true nature of reality. Because of this, for most of us the realizations that tend to happen most readily are within the nondual view; sometimes we might even experience realization within the unilocal view, but rarely do we encounter the view of totality". The first and second turnings, which culminate in the enlightenment of nonduality, are consistent but incomplete insofar as they do not include, for instance, unilocal unity or the realization of not being anything. As I discussed in Runaway Realization, there are many subtle concepts—of self, of time, of space, of causation, of emptiness—that persist in the classical enlightenment of unity or nonduality, and these preclude other experiences of reality. The view of totality, in the fourth turning, begins to address this incompleteness by including all possible views of reality". "The meaning of Total Being expands as our experience of true nature reveals more and more of itself. Total Being can shift from being the totality of the individual to the total being of the whole universe to the mysterious total being beyond time and space. True nature allows us to perceive everything in a new light. We recognize that where we are in the moment is not other than anything else. Everything else is within us, and not only everything else but everything else at all other times and places. When we are not experiencing ourselves this way, then we are experiencing ourselves only as the individual and not the unilocal nature of the individual. It’s true that as an individual, we are in time and space. But we are also the true nature of the individual that interpenetrates all time and all space, bringing everything in time and space to one singular point".

HEY guys, I do agree with Leo that non-duality is just one mode of existence. One lens of perception. This is why I distinguish between non-duality, non-locality and uni-locality. You could say that those are all different stages of non-duality, but there are on the relative level degrees of non-duality. Here are some quotes from AH ALmaas's website that most resonate to my current mode of development, and might point out some of those difference (Beyond non duality) All Forms Exist Within One Another "The Freedom Vehicle makes it possible to have these types of unity experiences – we call them experiences of unilocal unity, or unilocality – with another person, a group, or the whole universe. Unilocality is the view of reality related to a nothingness that has no sense of space, extension or distance. The experience of being in union in this nondimensional nothingness is unilocal unity. It can arise as the experience of two or more individuals sharing the same location often experienced as being inside each other. Unilocality is neither dual nor nondual. We are not talking here about an ocean of consciousness that unites all forms as they arise within it – the nonduality of the boundless dimensions; nor is it dual, when individual forms are separate and relating spatially. In unilocality, all forms exist within one another. As we become comfortable exercising the view of totality, we can consider all kinds of other questions from its perspective. One of the central issues that we deal with in this book is the relationship between duality and nonduality. Discerning the implications inherent in the nondual view opens up whole new possibilities of experience. We will spend some time exploring these new frontiers by examining the nature of time and space, the role of the particular individual, the paradox of nondoing, and the various mysteries of emptiness—all from the perspective of totality. What is revealed as we do this is that reality is far more indeterminate, far more mysterious than anything we can conceive of. No single view—whether dual, nondual, unilocal, or something else entirely—can capture the dynamism of reality. Freedom is the freedom of reality to reveal its dynamism, to express itself as form, as formlessness, as both, or as neither. No single feature and no combination of features can exhaust the potential of reality. It is a mystery without end. Reality is always revealing itself by knowing itself; and knowing reality and living it becomes the fulfillment of our life. The purity of reality expresses itself to us, through us, and as us, all at once. Our life becomes the life of true nature—the purity at the heart of reality—living consciously and expressing itself as us"