EntheogenTruthSeeker

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  1. @Average Investor thanks man! You’re the best👍
  2. @Average Investor where do recommend to learn about gut health and liver? Any resources you like?
  3. Have you found psychedelics are more portent after detox?
  4. @Michael569 fire post bro. Downloaded all 3 your books🙏😤
  5. @Vincent S hey, honestly it just blows my mind how nice people are here. Like “thank you for sharing” touched my heart so much man. It feels so good to be in a community like this that deeply uplifts people. I’m super glad you relate and had your awakening into suffering as well. It’s a tough one because it’s a very physical awakening that is 100% felt and leaves you changed on a cellular level each time. The greatest type of awakening IMO. As I have had a lot of pain and trauma. like I know how you mean how it feels so good to UNDERSTAND the meaning and mechanics/divinity behind the suffering, or else it’s just actual torture without knowing why you’re going through it or that relief is possible. Thanks so much for the video!:) That video is going to be put off for another day for me, because it is just a heavy subject as I have been strapped down to beds for days on end and been in facilities/around people like that (although not as severe). it breaks my heart seeing the beginning because some of that suffering seems unnecessary, cause how humans are so unhealthy and are environment is so toxic that these people may have been born with metals passed on from their mom, drug addicts, unhealthy moms, etc. it’s honestly cruel how people can have kids so willy nilly without detoxing first. Just IMO. I’m still healing and integrating from an experience last night, so I’ll update you when I watch it<3 I was at the $uicide Boys concert last night and the singer talked about wanting to kill himself, depression, being three year sober, etc. and once they played their last song after that, I exploded crying in front of all my brothers friends and people around us. It was one of the most memorable, mystical, loving, unifying, healing, enjoyable, and transformative experiences of my life. The music playing, everyone in one place enjoying something they love with no hate in their hearts.. concerts are just so beautiful. It’s like a glimpse into an Actualized society for a couple hours. it’s more than just entertainment to me. It’s deeply spiritual. Then, Leo’s motivational speech started with “I’m talking to you as a drug addict” and I’m just in awe how the universe is looking out for me.
  6. I’ve been crying so much these past three weeks, and every time I do, I suffer more, but I feel psychedelic levels of love and insights simultaneously. It literally feels like I’m on the peak of a trip: Massive release of suffering, Feeling an explosion of love, intellectually understanding the entire big picture/point of life & where I am in the present moment/how I got there & where my life is headed. I am almost predicting the future in some cases because my level of understanding is becoming so aligned with love and truth, it makes me visionary. After 6 years of Actualized, I’m really starting to love suffering and appreciating the lows, plateau, and highs as one unique and amazing harmonious system. I’m feeling at a rate that has been never before, akin to childhood level of rawness and sensitivity. I love it. Lol @ me thinking this path was about being “happy” and joyful all the time once I reached level enlightenment. I mean I know that is the case, but i see myself being unconditionally happy by suffering so much and having such an impeccable understanding of love/mechanics of reality, that I always surrender to the infinite love and design of this beautiful chance to be alive. like if I didn’t suffer tooth and nail my entire life, would I have ever had the courage and the determination to learn the mysteries of the universe that people think are impossible to answer? If I didn’t suffer and want to die most of my adolescence till now, would I even appreciate a spiritual awakening or would I just be like “bro it’s not that deep”, or use it as some form of spiritual ego to now be better than everyone else and form a guru complex to exploit people? I’m glad I suffered so much because it has made me more humble and pure. I can’t tell a lie for more than a week tops, and if it lasts that long, I break down crying. I crave 100% honesty. This makes me able to really embody any awakening I’ve had recently and allow me to show more love to those around me and for myself. So, send your favorite videos on Suffering. I love all of you on this forum, deeply. Everyone who has responded to my shit, especially the last year and last month, I would not be here without the nuanced advice of so many compassionate people. This community gives me hope and keeps me going, during my hardest times. And I desire to give others that same feeling of warmth.
  7. @Leo Gura @Nahm @Flowerfaeiry thanks for the support and advice y’all. yeah I’ve realized there was no point to me approaching girls because I wouldn’t even be able to bring them back to, what, my parents? Lmfao Inner value = outer value/success. <3
  8. After a moment of clarity on modafinil, I realized that all this self help and spiritual shit (at this point) after 6 years, is becoming/has been an escape from competition/survival/rejection. It’s also mental masturbation and distraction from doing the real shit that makes people attracted to me at face value/first interaction/get noticed. I’m just going to reinvent my appearance, style, health for the next two years and take a pause on more “deep” PD. I am in this limbo stage of being too orange for green communities, but too green for orange communities. This all stems from a horrible foundation of orange. (Glad I fully passed my foundation of stage red/blue this year as y’all have seen w Jesus BS😂) my spiritual shit don’t matter, when I look like a fucking bum. imagine I just played the social game and dressed like a Fuck boy with insane style but have the values of self help and spirituality. that’s what I did my first year of self help, and I’ve never had more attention from girls in my entire life. Ever since I got too serious about spirituality I just po pooed “playing ego games” “fitting in”, but honestly some of these spiritual ideas have severely hurt my development-ego, hasn’t served me at all. 1. buy 3 new outfits 2. get some jewelry, simple thin chain necklace, maybe light earrings 3. consistent haircuts 4. Master am impeccable hygiene/self-care routine. Much love! no matter how woke I get, I’ll never be “above” society or the rules, expectations, how success practically works, etc.
  9. @Gregory1 @Ima Freeman yo you guys came in so fucking clutch with this information! I couldn’t find shit on the web. thank you so much, you guys gave me hope!:))
  10. Yes, after many manic episodes I have not cared about people’s opinions, much more softer on myself, and am able to surrender to mystical experiences with no effort if I can focus. There’s no resistance. Im much more loving than I used to be, less judgmental. gave me insane visions and I see many interconnections and predict shit in society some people can’t see. All of this is possible without life-destroying mania. Like, I’m 23 male with no money in my back account, living at home, no momentum, etc. Getting my diet fruit and vegetable based has been #1 for sleep/no mania. What is your behavior like during mania? Has it severely disrupted your life?
  11. @Leo Gura Yeah, you’re getting pretty popular right now to the point where the trolls will take this too far and try to cancel your or some shit. Sad this is the world we live in:/ bunch of apes
  12. 9/10. Salt water irritated my eyes if I touched my face. however the magnesium and whatever else they put in the water made my body feel like it was massaged fully, all my cells. Completely relaxed. No adrenaline. Bliss. Best sleep I may have ever had that night. so amazing. Definitely going to go back when I get a job.
  13. Gnarly trip report! Makes me want to watch Leo’s deathbed stage orange vids😂😉
  14. Man, those things are the rarest, one of a kind, beautiful, inspiring, motivating, and calming pieces of art I’ve ever witnessed in my life. Leo, you ever going to record your awakenings again or is it too much for YT audience/trolls? Put them on the blog?:D
  15. @wma @Monkey_in_suit @Zakaria @lmfao @Raze thank you so much everyone! I am throughly shocked at how much support I just received. I will look into those videos. I really can’t move out, right now. I am in debt $1000 from moving out pre-maturely a month ago, and it didn’t end up well. I’m not ready. My chronic fatigue, mental issues, bad sleep patterns, etc are not healed enough to even work a standard 20-40 hour job yet. I have no foundation. I just spent 7 months in and out of hospitals, so I’m very out of touch with work-ethic/normalcy. im going to try and go on walks with her, but honestly, I just emotionally have no desire to be around her. She’s dead to me. She was gone for 3 weeks and not once did I miss her. i forgot she existed. on my last acid trip, I remembered in detail how she beat me and all the horrible things I’ve been through because of her, and ever since then, I have no space in my heart for her. Who tells a 4-5year old they’re fat, hide food from them, beat them, tell them they’ll never get a girl because you weigh 69lbs and have a bit of acne? She’s fucked! She also would put adderall out every morning after she knew how suicidal and addicted I was from it. She’s incapable of being a good person, most of the time. I only wanted her home so she can do my vegetable juicing. My main priority right now is going to do Bufo and releasing the huge pent up PTSD from my life. It’s deep and it’s physically locked in my body, I want a release and Truth, just once. I saved up $500, so within the next month in a half, I’ll be doing it.