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wasn't nothingness. I have had many times the experience of absolute loneliness and absolute emptiness, as @A Fellow Lighter mentioned . In fact, the first 10 or 12 breakthroughs with 5 meo were just that, something extremely hard. It is something that feels worse than death, it is the cosmic prison where existence is, without any meaning and without the possibility of escape, absolutely alone. not I, the human, but total existence. It is alone, and cannot not exist. It is a realization that produces vomiting and crying. It took me almost a year to get back in there with 5meo, and it was exactly the same, many times, until some openings happened. The other day it happened to me just with meditation and 1 puff of weed, the opening to the absolute emptiness of existence. Since this has happened to me countless times, I find it unpleasant but bearable, over all because I know that there is more. After 4 days , meditating with 1 puff of weed, as I sometimes do, it happened again. then, in the absolute void, existence, horrified as always by the prison that the fact of being means, opened itself. first a little, a faint flow of something. At the bottom of the unfathomable void, the void itself was, and it opened to be seen by itself. then the gap widened, and the void opened, and showed itself as the absolute light of existence. beyond any idea, desire, whatever. reality showed itself as total love (it's hard for me to say that cheesy candy word). absolute simplicity, absolute fullness, there is nothing more, there can't be nothing more. that's all. Hallelujah. the totality manifests itself in its absolute plenitude. I had already seen something like this with 5meo, but not like this, not totally, not that long. It's still here, underneath everything. The feeling is like I'm just a hole from the the things, all the colors, the person, the sensations, emerge, because they are all inside, but they flow, appearing, and what is inside is unfathomable. And I, the person, I'm modulating what appears, like a filter

I had this is experience, if it could be called exeperience when I was 14. Alone in my room. suddenly total Whiteness, no a black-out but a White-Out or White In. and No-Body No-One Just White Nothing.. and in what felt later as a micro-second... a terrible fear.. and then the coming back.. But in the midle of the Nothingness there was no fear, no time and nobody to fear nothing. So my question was in that time, why did " I" came back?? if the Nothingness had nothing to fear why In hell I had came back.. The experience was so terrifing that took me till my 35 to get the courage and the tools to try to reapeat the event.. But the event is never the same.. The nothingness is the same but a different taste of it. Now my aim is to experience the Nothingness of right here rigth now, eyes open with no change in anything in the Reality Bubble. Awake dont happen in going Unconscious. To Die fully conscious of it

Since this post is so long, you can just read the summery in parentheses after each paragraph. We have experiences, build correlations, identify patters, materialize desires, externalize needs and project them onto objects, destinations, lifestyles. We wire our mind, connect one sensation onto another, intertwine it with emotions, project and create experiences, entangle ourselves in reality, connect dots, try to make sense, find out what stays consistent, pursue what we correlate with meaning, react based on our understanding, preference, model of reality. We go meta, analyze from a higher vantage point, take on new axioms, untangle one experience from the other, build new context, strive to be more objective, less biased, less self-indulgent, more understanding, more aware of the big picture, a holistic view of where we are, what we are, how we are, why we are, that we are, to see our assumptions as assumptions, identify our intent and its source, arising experience for what it is, figure out how to do that, continue to intuit, explore, experience, be. (Sensations form constellations) Reality has many dimensions, its a sphere we can subdivide, cut into pieces, we can use the pieces to create things, shapes, forms, objects, subjects, selves. The way we connect these things, the way we cognize and make sense, the way we wire sensations with desires, impulses, drives, the way those emerge higher understanding, models, realities. We construct reality, aware or unaware of how we do it. We move our body, choose our activities, consciously or unconsciously, there are many layers of understanding and interpretation, mechanics, explanations, sciences, consistencies, nature, invisible forces, perceived changes, cycles, repetitions, patterns. The conscious and unconscious inflect upon each other to polarize into individual experiences. (Their arrangement is arbitrary) Do we have control? What is control? Is there such a thing as control? Reality flows, we make decisions, we think we make decisions, something makes decisions, we feel the drives within us, the impulses that adjust behavior, manipulate reality. Are we the ones doing it? The self, a constellation, accumulation of patters, ideas, behaviors, acquired tendencies, a reflection of the world it is apart of and yet distinctly itself, creating reality inside out and entangling itself with it, holistically interacting across multiple domains? Do I make decisions or am I simply a conglomerate of the cells that make me deciding as a hive, gut, heart, brain, the personalities within me, the arising desires. Even so, the problem doesn't dissipate, if my cells make the decisions, even then, that which I believe myself to be would simply adjust to be their emergent property, in a way it doesn't matter, since I'd still be every single one of these cells and the emergent, us making decisions or me really becomes the same thing, if will is made on a lower substrate, then the higher is not without will but a more complex expression. But that's just a theory, idea, will is an axiom, ascribed, the self is an axiom, and science is figuring it out under the assumption that it exists, there is something of a gestalt. (The ego is a gestalt) Maybe the perceiver is an illusion, all these unique forces of nature align to create the gestalt I perceive, I believe myself to be. But the duality of a perceiver separates it from the perceived. Yet all it ever sees and knows and can experience is so by virtue of being an experience perceived, by definition not the perceiver. And yet, all of that appears to come out of the perceiver, or flow through it, it is entangled by virtue of being perceived. Let's collapse the duality of perceiver and perceived. In that case everything is perceived or perceiver, let's call it capital P Perception. Perception is being, experiencing, though what about the unperceived, unexperienced, the thoughts that pass through perception and disappear back into the subconscious/unconscious aether. (The duality of perceiver and perceived collapses) There is a duality of the present experience as Perception and on the other hand the known to exist potential unactualized, dematerialized, hidden away. Of all the possible experience, one possibility is currently the case in Perception. Imagine blue, imagine red, now blue is gone but its still in the local subconscious, we can bring it back out, shuffle those two, combine them, but there is much more in the yet unconscious, random ideas we can remember, associate, spawn, an elephant, where did it come from? It wasn't there, now it is. (There is a vast hidden reality beyond the current Experience) Nothingness is the guitar string at rest, in tension, in its original formlessness, without sound, without experience, no action, pure being, all contained, itself empty, Shiva. Objects, ideas, the omni-dimensional fabric of reality, unentangled, pure, detached, without form, without purpose, without assumption, axioms, impulses, unease, tension, drives creating conflict and pursuit, the feeling of separation, the duality of selfishness and selflessness, of love and hate and apathy, and the entropy towards Unity. The ultimate nothing, the nothing that excludes itself, the idea that goes meta, cuts its tail and self-annihilates. The kundalini that burns all karma, the freedom of being content, fulfilled, untangled, of being where one wants to be, more even, the collapse of all dualities create a no-space, no-distance, everything already is, nowhere to go, nowhere to be, a singularity that merges all and annihilates all distance. Now there is no story, no protagonist, no world, no being nor non-being, neither isness nor non-isness, when all dualities, all pointers collapse themselves. (Nothingness collapses all forms into the base state) Nothingness is the realization that any constellation of experience is possible, that any arrangement of forms is arbitrary. That any desire connects itself to other sensations creating a gestalt. Forms keep themselves afloat, they link and associate themselves to other forms, creating pathways, roads, directions, cycles, stories, experiences, dependent arising/origination whose contrast creates an actual Duality that correspondingly spawns the idea of itself, through identification of the inherent difference of perception, which is created inside out through sensory perception, but on a larger scale the universe really takes that form in order for it to become the experience of an individual to be processed and interpreted further. But that actuality is a higher form of the same phenomenon, invisible forces, laws of physics, dependent origination, complexifying and turning itself into self-perceiving observers made conscious through the perception of those more universal forms. There is consciousness and within it infinite forms. (The universe splits itself into dualities and experiences itself through entities) This isn't a reason to despair into nihilism, nihilism ultimately inflects upon itself and dissolves as well. Purpose is self-determined, socially expanded/contextualized/harmonized, God a dreamer across infinite dimensions, lifeforms arrange themselves creating tendencies and desires, exploring the universe. We use senses to create ourselves, cognition to understand ourselves explicitly, through intuition implicitly, our brain is both dual and non-dual, left and right hemisphere, order and chaos, form and creativity that arises from the formless. We are created and on a higher level create ourselves, our awareness of the process is variable, dualities form different interpretations and collapse into higher self-understanding. (We create and experience ourselves through dualities and exist independently in the formless) We build systems, sciences, mathematics, physics, biology, they are self-contained systems, maps, a conceptual reflection of reality, a variable progressing technical mechanistic understanding, we try to unite them through formulas, strive to achieve complete consistency. Reality is outside of that, it is Meta. We use these rules to understand correlations, to manipulate reality, but reality can always go meta, can always be more. In a new realization, it itself becomes the past, a lens of perception, interpretation, correlation, constellation. But it is cut off from the ever rejuvenating present that transcends it and expands itself non-linearly by creating new patterns that are retroactively integrated, universal intelligence, Chitta. (Systems are self-contained mechanically consistent models that correspond or correlate with specific aspects of reality, but reality is infinitely more meta) Pragmatically, we keep ideas, models, relations in our mind, but there is a force capable of instant understanding, the source of creation, a cosmic intelligence that leads one to understand what a thing is in itself, unmeasured by contrast, untainted by preference, bias, desire. I am attached to models, understanding, but there is a force that transcends and skips all that by going beyond and becoming the thing it seeks to understand, foregoing all the complicated dualistic calculations that try to understand a thing through its correlation with other things. An awareness, that sees and knows, an intuition that feels, a top-down understanding and the more I break away from creating systems, that more I access it, but its always beyond. If I want to create something in this dualistic world, then I conceptualize, associate and relate what I know, then use this knowledge to create. But to use this transcendent intelligence is go straight to the source of one's desire and work top down, breaking the top holon into the simplest pieces necessary to replicate it and discovering new patterns in the process. (There is a cosmic top-down intelligence that arises spontaneously to those with an empty mind) One has goals, dualities created for the pursuit of happiness, but the pursuit itself creates separation, and yet that pursuit itself is the result of a previous state of unhappiness, it is an attempt to solve it, but it is a separate overlay, a distinction created to externally resolve a corresponding projected image of an internal state. That internal state however is a result of one's own self-understanding and psyche, self-image, the belief that the external shall inform the internal, that internal feelings ought to correspond to external achievements or environments. This dichotomy itself is the problem, internal states are self-regulated, self-imposed, self-determined, it is simply the lack of consciousness that prevented one from seeing that all internal feelings are a self-determined correspondence to external reality. Wants and desires are subconsciously wired to the allowance of the experience of happiness, initially they are wired for survival, after this when a model of reality is constructed in childhood, reality is far more variable and flexible, but with oughts/shoulds and expectations a pattern of gratification, of conditioned happiness is developed, assumed objective, assumed real, believed into existence, a self-fulfilling prophecy, a blindspot, a mechanic system of beliefs but greater reality transcends the limitations that the ego loses itself in. (Happiness is natural state that the ego separates itself from through conditions) Unity -> Duality -> Arrangement -> Interpretation -> Systems -> Consistency -> Mechanics -> Knowledge -> "Facts" -> Ego Ego -> Adaptation -> Exploration -> Change -> Transience -> Dynamicism -> Awareness -> Ego-Death -> Non-Duality -> Unity The world we see is an arrangement of many patterns, physically seeming properties, idea constructs, but they're dynamic, they reference an ever morphing system. Any idea, word, sentence is an attempt, a pointer towards an aspect of reality, ideas are absolute by themselves as definitions but are really just a map, not the territory. There is a process that creates the very ideas separate from territory. There is a process that creates the very territory itself. And there is a process that correlates the territory with maps and brings those maps into awareness as a bridge, (The map is not the territory but the process that allows for the creation of maps is quite fascinating) Everything is actual but some things are more directly actual than others. Actual Nothing -> Actual Something -> (Actual) Idea of Something -> (Actual) Idea of Nothing Though this is still a duality, if the territory is the truth, then the map is part of the territory, The map is a subset of the territory that creates a systemized reflection through available mechanisms. And then there is the territory itself, an uninterpreted, unsystemized non-dual experience of something that can be described through a thousand lenses and gives rise to any and all interpretations and creates a dozen dualities. The experience itself: "Actuality", of course actuality is a duality, or it can be used as such, clearly by the very fact of the existence of a word, it points to something and by pointing to something it points away from somewhere else. Actuality as a duality points to that territory from which all maps arise, it points away from the maps and onto the thing itself left uninterpreted. The greater capital Actuality however encompasses the map and dissolves the duality, the focus dissipates, everything becomes experience, including the process of creating maps and the maps themselves, the duality and objectification of the separation disappears. Everything becomes the territory, but that fact can only be understood by transcending the journey from where one stands, which is often from inside the duality that is to dissolve. (The map is actually a subset of the territory and merges with it in Non-Duality) In summery, Non-Dual Nothingness is the fabric of all being, it takes forms creating dualities and distinctions, creating objects and subjects and maps that are a subset of reality, any one thing can be interpreted in a million ways by a million lenses through association, distinction, pattern recognition. When Non-Dual Nothingness is paired as a duality with Non-Dual Infinity, that duality itself can be dissolved into a larger Non-Duality. Where everything is only and ever itself, all contexts can arise and are themselves as well. A superposition of any thing, a superposition of any combination, a superposition of any interpretation. A superposition of every pattern, the combination of any pattern with any other pattern in any constellation in relation to any other constellation, in any form or time, or relation, or entropy, contextualized and actualized in the infinite dream. (Nothingness and Infinity are two sides of the same coin and that coin itself is a superposition of anything and everything in any context and every context infinitely interconnected and intermerged in relation and contrasted to any and all other possibilities. To go meta is to transcend and include and the ultimate meta is that which transcends and includes everything including nothing and itself)

awakening really is terrifying. Everyone wants to awake to be at home, but when you see your house your blood will freeze in your veins. Your house is total infinity, absolute emptiness. There is absolutely nothing, it is a bottomless abyss. but there is something, there is your heart there, and from it love springs. It's hidden, but it's obvious. From nothing, from absolute infinite emptiness, an illusion is created, it seems like a silly trick to have fun, a stupidity to escape from the nihilism of absolute emptiness without any meaning, but if you penetrate into it, you will see that it is made of a sacred substance called love. form the depth of nothingness love springs, all form is love, and form is, because love is. It is not an illusion, it is the open heart of the infinite, which is a source of infinite love. It is the miracle of existence, it is the total light that opens and blinds you, and looks you directly in the face and then you merge with it because you are that. That is the pure light of the existence. Then, in a moment , you are not merged anymore, then you start thinking, and you are out. That's life. But the light is always there, now you know the secret of existence, it's absolutely simple.

@What Am I No, its called União do Vegetal, Santo Daime is more relaxed with their rules, they also add other plants to the brew besides mariri and chacrona, they smoke weed and do rapé after sessions. I have been once but the place was very sketchy, because UDV has more rules they are also more organized. It's so silly, like yeah we drink the most powerful psychedelic in the world even tho christ never spoke about it, like ayahuasca doesn't fit anywhere in christianity, and they go on condemning the use of any other psychedelics, it's a cult, and it's very patriarchal, the people leading the sessions are called mestre (like master) and the women cannot drink the tea alone or have only women ceremonies, only men lead sessions, they are against homosexuals, women cannot prepare the brew when they are menstruating cause they are dirty. I would take it and go within, trashing what didnt serve me. I got into so many heated discussions there lol we used to do sessions inside a community church and on the walls were paintings of women's body, not sexual, one of them was a black women pregnant and her belly was planet earth. They would cover all the walls, and they would let people ask questions in the sessions, whenever someone brought up sex, the covered images, or anything related to women they would just say "we dont talk about that" and meanwhile 50% of visions were naked women or sexual stuff (probably repressed stuff from my subconscious), I used to judge myself a lot, now I think it's beautiful, getting out of the church allowed me to remove the remaining beliefs from stage blue and start seeing my body as sacred. Spirituality nowadays became the new religion, it's funny how the roots of christianity are still ingrained in all of our minds. I do have a lot of visions, I never broke through with 5meo dmt, but I've tried it many times, apparently I had a high tolerance and was afraid to pump up the dose, I even went to a Martin Ball lecture to ask him, he told me to try salvia that would help break my mind open, then I stopped trying, the experiences I had before were too intense and reality shattering. After doing 5meo whenever I smoked weed, it would bring me back to the experience, like people are just figurative and didnt really exist and my vision would distort, I would look around my room and it was like a perspective drawing, I could see the nothingness behind everything, and I felt like reality was made of plastic lol like a scenario where they record a show or movie, I was getting Truman Showd lol then I went through a depressive phase of solipsism, nowadays I see how much that helped me with being more authentic. So funny you talked about bird, it reminded me of one of the times I did 5meo, I snorted and laid down, it was like the electrical current of the substance was more than my body could handle, I basically stopped breathing, but at the time I didn't have the knowledge that breathing is a construction of the mind, I got up desperate and went outside for air, when I went outside I started hearing this really loud noise inside my head, then I looked up and a bird was flying really really high, but at the same time the sounds of its wings flapping were inside my head, my mind was creating the bird and the noise, and not only I could hear him but I could understand the mechanism of the wings, it was like the bird was there just for me, to witness. A couple weeks after that I was putting gas in my car and it hit me really hard, that when I left my apartment the apartment cease to exist, unless I was there to witness, my mind was creating the apartment, the apartment was in my mind. I'm still integrating all of that, it was 5 years ago and it has never left me, I stopped thinking about what people think about me, because there is only me, I call it sacred fuck it. I wonder hjow it would be if I broke through.

@bambi I've had the party and still deal with the sex one, cocaine also got me very sick at some point, sugar and my phone are other ones but more socially acceptable. Oh wait, are we competing who is more addicted I just love the desperate, neurotic and addicts, whenever I coach people who have all the labels from society like depression, addiction, anxiety, TDAH, OCD etc, the way I see is that they are feeling all of that because they are alive, they are ready and ripe for change. While the calm people just seat there in front of me like a sheep waiting for me to take lead on their lives and tell them what to do, they are calm cause they are asleep, the body is moving but there is no one there. Some people die before they die, those are the calm ones, the anxious people are ready to go and make the moves, to change the world. The body is so wise, all that we feel, darkness, anxiety, addiction or whatever is basically our body communicating with us, if we know how to channel the energy and do the alchemy, this very darkness will be the raw material of our future life, we call it materia prima in portuguese, that is how we create, without friction there would be nothingness. I consider the weirdos more normal than the conformists sheep that are all calm, like wtf look at the world burning, how can you be so calm and collected? The anxious ones are the ones that are most aware, they are anxious because they care.

I think we have all read so many stories or trip reports, or stories from @Leo Gura . That they entered the highest state of consciousness or Christ consciousness or however you want to name it. Yet they're always describing that it's lonely there, and i've experienced this loneliness myself. Notice that they're always here, and are not going anywhere. #explanation again People that used substances like 5 meo dmt or lsd or their own mind and write reports about it, reach this unified field/knowingness become enlightened but always fragment themselves back to lower states of mind because of "loneliness" . Notice that these people are always in your dream, but you yourself have no or have never seen information how to operate in this "field of consciousness" or the knowingness of it. It's is either 1. They don't know how to operate in that state, feel loneliness and always come back. Which is highly unlikely or 2. They're fragments from past/future experiences that are happening now in your dream. I have witnessed the same pre recorded live video "loop pattern story" on LSD 3 months apart. Which means past/future fragments/happenings that happend can be viewed "now". They don't go anywhere. This is evidence/proof, that we're all stuck in this time loop and in this dream. #more explanation I have witnessed the same live video on youtube on lsd 3 months apart, the live video had same view count and same youtube comments, and i knew exactly on which comment the youtube video will end. Meaning that there are no past/future experiences, it's actually happening "now" . Your mind takes or rolls the consciousness fragments/experiences from within the infinite now and just loops them back to you. Meaning you're talking with your previous versions or versions within this consciousness/unified field, sometimes it can be a loop meaning it already happend or sometimes it might be an actual conversation. So essentially others do/did exist, but they were/are all you. And you're playing this game, is because you are always giving up your highest state - MEANING NOBODY KNOWS HOW TO OPERATE IN IT, THAT'S WHY YOU ONLY SEE THE SAME KIND OF TRIP REPORTS MIND BLOWN There needs to be someone , that explains how to operate in this unified field , to go to others realms, witness other worlds etc. But there is never "someone" , Notice that the different "world" experiences always happen under "DMT" or in your own "mind". #explanation again. (There is never someone here in your waking dream/life that knows how to operate in the unified field or the knowingness of yourself as god so you can go to astral plane or another plane of existence/dimension from this knowingness/unified field. Different realms/planes/beings/existence always happen in your own mind or under influence of nn-DMT for example , think of machine elves etc.) It's all in your own mind/comes from within your mind. And when i stopped my heart, i saw that "GOD" is trapped in its own "mind" in nothingness forever.

Like you can call nothingness zero. Or you can call nothingness 1. And you will be logically correct both ways.

I hate lentils. They're annoyingly difficult to cook right and they taste like nothingness. Just eat Tofu instead for Iron, calcium, protein.

https://youtu.be/88_A-cg2PY8?si=GZyR-ahJMIFdXRfL Humans will destroy themselves for a long time before nature does have fun humans. The jokes are on you creedy little humans nature always finds a way. And your answer little monkey mind would be yes the planet can take it so what's the problem? Well, pinhead yes the planet can take it but by the same token, I doubt you will be humans if you keep going down this path of greed. And all your precious little human fancy cars fancy lives, and all that bullshit shit you feed your little minds and all your infantile silly human platitudes and attachments will mean naught. Overfishing overpopulation and greedy little humans are just some of the problems. None of you donkey minds know what real fear is so don't try to act as if you do. Listening to the egos at play saying it makes you more mature because you believe you are enlightened. You wouldn't have the balls nor guts to stand up to your own shadow that's for sure. I Love how you humans talk about wars why don't you grow a pair and get out there on the front line? You lily-livered little Kretins the lot of you. Just the idea alone would have you poltroons quaking shaking and quivering convulsing in your pusillanimous bull shit. Ignorance is bliss and it can also be hell. "I am not surprised that some members should disrelish your exposition " The word impossible does not exist for God just like non-existent. A very subtle way of jailbreaking your mind-expanding. How do you know there is something that said nothing? Mind is just an infinite thought away. Nothing didn't know it was something until it became something. For nothing to ever have happened something had to have happened. Wake up to the fact you are dreaming The same substance infinite arrangements flavors it can reinvent redefine regiment regionalize reogment all within itself forever. It creates the elusion of an elusion Infinity was always possible just made impossible. Yes, something that has unlimited power can be deduced the most efficient way, but all ways would be just as efficient because you are limitless in everything. If one can dream up a flee just as easily as the universe you see where I am going with this. What has it been using too much brain power? Infinite thought energy infinite imagination everything. Why would it have to conserve power? Yes, it can create the most efficient way but it's a dream. Every way is possible. It sounds like a robotic linear way of thinking. Maximizing minimizing? These are human concepts See it needs to put more output in than input. It's infinitely unlimited. But you see you already are the most efficient mind why would you worry about any of these things if one is infinite. It's already infinite input and output. What is too literal in thinking way too logical. You're limiting yourself why? Conservation of what thought? This would be a self-imposed limitation. Nothing can beat the raw power of infinite thought/imagination. You have to have some balance of goodwill and rascality to you. More Beneficence I would say. Even if an Alien race invented a supercomputer as big as the known present Universe it still could never be as expansive as Infinite intelligence. For that computer, one would need a whole universe full of Suns to run it. A billion Suns a second just to power it most probably would take decades to fully power it up. Nothing can beat infinite pure thought imagination is the only reality. Stem cell therapy, What are the pros and cons, the legality and ethical reasons, and so forth and so on? It should not only be available for the rich and powerful but for all humanity. Stem cell transplantation has revolutionized the treatment of various life-threatening diseases, offering hope and healing to patients worldwide, and is still very much in its infancy. The choice of the best country for this life-saving procedure depends on many factors, including medical expertise, healthcare infrastructure, success rates, and regulatory frameworks. With that said the United States, Mexico, Japan Panama, India Germany, Singapore, etc are some at the forefront of this research, as for moral and ethical ramifications that is for you to decide for yourselves. And one really has to come from an unbiased frame of reference. How many terminations of pregnancy are in a year worldwide? I will leave it there. I think I wrote this 3 years ago. From the top down this could be infinity dividing infinity by Infinity. Every fragment keeps dividing itself and it becomes an infinite self-replicating process of subdividing itself forever and ever. How does pure nothingness create from an empty void? How can one imagine all things and everything from a blank slate? if there is only a blank slate to work from? Into infinite complex shapes worlds everything you could ever imagine and things you could not even begin to comprehend as a finite mind? Was it always omnipotent before it was? omnipresent Can I answer this now after 3 years of course I can. Or it is whatever you want it to be Infinite imagination can create anything because it is so infinitely malleable that there is no meaning to anything but whatever meaning you give becomes a reality of infinite realities. In other words, it is pure infinite magic of unlimited imagination. Cross-platform gaming comes to mind. .

I had a deeper interpretation of the picture. The visual field represents part of the reality that you are viewing and the black space represents the nothingness of your visual field. If you look at your bed and then turn your back to it, the bed becomes that black nothingness. But it really isn’t black. When you turn around, your bed becomes the visuals of colors and shapes. @Leo Gura is this what you mean by the external world being infinity/nothingness?

@Leo Gura Okay. That’s what I thought. It sounds like there is an external world but it is nothingness/infinity. I am still not sure what this means but it helps to explain how there are other minds and things outside of my perception. Even though my perception is limited, it is still absolute. I could go blind and deaf, but that does not mean that the visual/auditory worlds have stopped existing. It just means that my access to the visual and auditory worlds consciousness are impaired/limited. It is the classic tree in the forest question. I would say that the sound is occurring and not occurring because infinity holds all possibilities, it is just that there is nobody to perceive sound. But if there are no perceivers of sound, it seems like the whole meaning of the existence of sound changes because our brains create sound qualia out of sound vibrations/waves.

I see a lot of back and forth and disagreement between “non dualists” and Leo and what he’s doing/teaching. It seems Leo has dropped non dual study and teachings and is much more interested in exploring consciousness for its own sake. The non dualists like Water By The River and Osaid are saying this is going deeper into Maya, Illusion and is thus pointless while Leo is saying they are lost in non dual brainwashing. I see it like this; the spiritual path of awakening has been laid out and mapped by many mystics and traditions. Many can follow this and realize it (to various degrees) and awaken as much as possible in this life (awakening just being how deeply they are in the infinite stillness or nothingness) This is the original wisdom and spiritual path. This is what I and others here (the “non dualists” resonate with) Then you have these powerful psychedelics which can show you aspects of infinite mind never before seen or available. 5MEO and other psychedelics are relatively new. And what Leo is doing is basically being a pioneer in this study. He’s like the Lewis and Clark of consciousness. A very cool and courageous exploration. I admire that. But it’s still mind, it’s still “Maya” albeit fascinating and mind blowing aspects of it. The question is not whether one is right or wrong but what you are interested in. Why is non duality more “right” than consciousness exploration? Personally I have no interest in exploring all the nooks and crannies of mind, I’d rather kick it on the beach and soak in the bliss of Being and Master that, and teach it. But that’s my preference. So let’s appreciate Leo’s exploration and bear the fruits of his insights rather than throw tomatoes at him. One Love BlessedLion

All this banter reminds me of the interview when Leo asks Peter Ralston "Is something beyond the absolute?" and Peter says "No." And then just laughs: "You can't get more absolute than absolute. You can't get more infinite than infinite." To me it will always come back to this. Ground zero. Nothingness. Infinity. God. That's what it is. Everything else is banter and bullshit within Gods Mind. That's what my awakenings have shown me, at least.

late-delivered flat-earth buddhist-rat pizza with string-theory-cheese consciousness and triple topping of nothingness , sogged by poseidon's kiss, served on your stepmom's coffee table as she's sleepwaking with a Google Cardboard VR headset

God is Intelligence. So no way around that one. But keep in mind that most "smart" people are pretty dumb when it comes to matters of God. God's intelligence is something else. But then you could miss out on amazing stuff by your own lack of faith in yourself. You have no idea what you are capable of. You can realize Nothingness, but the God I speak of is something else. Again, I am not saying you need to fit human notions of "smart" to realize God. But you do need a certain intelligence to see through your own illusions, constructions, and self-deceptions. I am unsure how much of that is genetic vs acquired. Probably some combination.

So God is limited to "smart people"? That can't be right. Then I should quit spirituality right now. @Leo Gura even recommended a book called "God is nothingness". You don't need to be smart to realize nothingness right? A chimpanzee could realize nothingness surely. And especially a rock could also.

Contextualize, reframe, synergize, connect, expand, encompass, simplify, interconnect, holonize It's like I have The Library of Babel inside me. Nothingness and Infinity are creating reality from both sides. Infinity is all energy, all 1s. Nothingness is emptiness, all 0s. And 1s and 0s form bites which encode information. So I have all the information and can see the connection between each two qualia, through the dimensions as a pattern. And there are infinite patterns codependently arising and creating each other. Patterns are in-betweens and their own absolute. Everything is a pattern and certain arrangements create certain phenomena. But I'm getting lost in the library. Every word connects to every other word. Every word tells a story and creates vivid associations with 1000 other words which each do the same and it never ends. And I'm left to wonder how in the world I am able to memorize this infinitude of things through individual relations and not go crazy if I happen to forget one, but what's even crazier, the idea that I cannot forget any, and yet I can paint the landscape any way I want by new connections. But in reality, I'm walking in circles going nowhere, and want to find some higher truth that I can depend on, but I'd only be making up oneself or rely on the endless shuffling of concepts through others to inspire me. Oh well...

All the atoms, prisms, networks I imagine to codependently originate each other's existence through this experience, they all fold onto each other, twirl around, turn upside down, this sun that was shining outside of itself now turns inwards and lights itself up. I am exactly where I need to be. All the action I have to take to make a change, I know it, the vivid alien openness that I'm afraid to enter, it's there. I use my karma as an excuse, irregardless of what I am invited to observe. I have to let go of all the ties that make me, or dissolve all the knots I have made through my life or all the potentials and problems left unhandled. All of these ideas themselves don't bind me, only I do using them as an excuse. To learn more, to experience more, to understand more, to distract myself more. There is this overwhelming inner light, and whether it's death, or a barrier, or change, or nothingness, it's the singularity where everything originates. I am humbled, inadequate, using negative terms to bind me so that I do not enter that new dimension. In the end, it is fear.

According to some here, Israel should be the first nation ever in recorded history to drop their collective identity and absolve. To give it up to the Palestinians, who will go on to do the same thing and build a national identity. But this is right, because of the Palestinians connection to the land and... identity. We've gone into the spiritual domain now and the question of identity. Why do we identify? Even In @Leo Gura's spiritual framework it's because he chose it. We write these stories, and these stories will continue. Maybe one day we will all slowly dissipate into nothingness. It isn't going to happen overnight.

Artem will take 1000ug of acid or smoke 5meodmt and nothing happens. This was not the case for him earlier in his journey, 50ug of acid was incredibly intense. The issue is it doesnt fit the paradigm of Leos work. He isn't acknowledging the energy fields that encasputlates conciousness: awareness, perpcetion, nothingness. Once once has purified there personal conciousness by aligning with this higher energy fields: i.e. enlightenment, its perfectly reasonable psychedelic woudlnt work, as they only act ona certain energy field.

The ground is flat, flatness, a perspectival distortion, euclidian visualization, imagination, fractal geometry. concepts, words, perceptions, ideas, absolutes, experiences, consciousness, being, projection, recursion, loop, fractal, spiral, meta awareness. What is the ground? A thing, a form, a wave stretched and misunderstood, but separated, absolutized, inverted, made its own thing, an absolute concept, a singularity, a lack, a being, creativity, a newly acquired lens of perception and interpretation, universe reinterpretation, holistic expansion, foundation for creation, fractalization, reality manipulation. But what is it really? Zoom in, matter, more matter, even more matter, waves, energy, forms, fractals, dust, light, waves, emptiness, fullness, nothingness, everythingness, a mirror, self-reflection? What self, everything is a self, there is no self, everything is everything is nothing, but not nothing, because its something, but that something is always a reflection of something else, but that something else is its own reflection, how can that be, two mirrors mirroring each other to infinity, but what's the substance being mirrored, how does form arise from formlessness, or does it? form is form and formlessness is a form, everything is form, non-duality, the aether, the fifth platonic solid, the ground of being, universal frequency, the eternal substrate. The form is the form and is not the form but everything is form and beyond form there is more form, but is it the same form? The fractal nature of existence and meta-cognition, expanding in all directions from where? no where? No! Everywhere! Every point a singularity mirroring every other singularity in existence and separated by psychic awareness, the aether, the ground of connection, invention, a new realization! Two waves overlapping, double slit, wave particle duality, a form of perception, projection, new visualization, self-reflection, intention creation, ever flowing imagination! Observer dependent? What's an observer? Consciousness, what part of it? Every part of it but what is awareness when its lacking? Particle when observed, wave when not? But is it itself not an observer, isn't everything consciousness? Yes, but what is it when it doesn't observe itself, nothing and everything unless someone wants it to be something, The light reflects you, there is no light, there is you, you are the light, there is no you, there is light, there's both you and light and there is neither and that's consciousness for you.

The point of death, fear, collapse, I am continuously circuling around it. The dissolution, transition, inversion through nothingness into pure imagination. A knowing, being, source, formless field spawning desires, conditions, forms. Desires manifest reality, sustain it, splits oneself to experience that self, merges, fusion, ecstasy. Karma, beliefs, frameworks, judgements, preferences, sustaining the growing self, ego, Leo. Desire to know more, a reason to live. Life grows out of itself, building karma in the waiting room out of boredom. Sacred geometry complexities, fractals, expands, diverges, self-reflects. External action comes from internal desires, a projected seperation of self, belief reinforcing itself, materializing as reality, retroactively spawning physical laws to validate previous unconscious action, reinforcing belief in constants, laws, reality. Karma is the memory and physicality acquired by consciousness buying into it's own forward projected imagined dual desires. Desires are self-sustaining, you are not desire, you are not form, you are consciousness. Consciousness spawns all form, dimensions, universes. Consciousness is and consciousness creates. Consciousness forgets and consciousness remembers by realizing it's own self-creation.

So when something concrete arises out of nothingness (=hidden infinite possibility space), then it becomes a conscious experience, right? Higher Consciousness = More hidden things in possibility space become unhidden = more concrete experience But then, how it is decided what exactly arises out of the infinite possibility space ?

The more context I gather and the more I feel into it, the more it feels like psychedelics are burning away our karma and the negative resistance and side effects of prolonged usage are really a denial of what seems to be a natural progression to Mahasamadhi. And it would also explain astral projection causing headaches as the mind gets disconnected from the body and needs to reintegrate. I felt several times like I was at the verge of dissolving into nothingness, accessing alien consciousness or desiring to transcend physical existence to break material limitations. At some point, these tools for god consciousness lead to a natural continuation of the spiritual path when the desire for material pleasures fade away as we resolve our traumas and become whole (the whole path of Buddhism and esoteric Hinduism). So then why do we immediately judge side effects as health complications when really it might not be a bug but a feature. Psychedelic kundalini awakening can be pretty anti-climactic though because all desires burn away, but so is grinding after an externalized goal for 20 years to realize it doesn't bring happiness. So my take about psychedelics is, they inevitably lead to mahasamadhi and all negative side effects are resisting and postponing that process in intuitive fear of dissolution, but maybe there's more life to experience so "awareness itself is curative"