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Thank you for sharing this. It really coincided at a good time. One where I make that commitment to die by giving up the parts for the whole for no particular reason. It's beyond all reason, the mind is cut from its roots. Nothing remains. “Within me there was a steady flow of undiluted bliss.” ~ Ramakrishna

@kieranperez You are not meant to know what you want right now in your life, otherwise you would know! Where you are at is perfect. Life is giving you one of the biggest lessons here, to be okay with having no idea what you want and to face all your fears surrounding that projected through the people you love, and your thoughts and emotions. One day you will know exactly what you want, and it won't be you who figures it out. It will be given to you as a random idea, or a strong impulse. So enjoy the experience of not knowing. Own it. Live it. All you can do is accept this, and start the journey of embracing your heart in each breathe you take. Whether you are in your heart or not you can't miss what you are destined to experience which may be a lifetime of having no drive, or maybe in a few years you will want to start a business. But until then, it is wise to remain in your Heart, where dependant on nothing you can feel the Unconditional Bliss that you truly are, that is not dependant on knowing or not knowing, or career. From that place, no question will arise, or doubt or fear about the future if that is what you want to be free from. Or you can stay in your Head and experience the consequences of that, and that is perfect too. These are the 2 primal locations to live from. Change the foundations, and all else will be revealed and given.

Ok.. then I will keep this thread alive and post whenever I find time to narrate the story: Let me make the first post but the screenplay is going to be not in the Chronological order; I will make the order so that you see the links between the events more clearly: Scene 1: Two Osho sannyasins from Germany wanted me to meet me when they visit India. They emailed me 2-3 months before. I interact with them on whatsapp about their travel plan. He tells me he would visit me on Nov 23rd. But on November 6th of this month, I tell him that 26th is better because it is on a Sunday. I will be free on Sundays... Scene 2: On November 9th, I send him a reply to a previous conversation asking me to remind me two days before their arrival. On the same day, I write the above poem and slept; I was woken up by the death news; It was a big death in our entire family and it was totally unexpected. Scene 3: Problems start between me and my father. My father gets offended by me and starts to point out how worthless my life is. I challenge my father and there is a cold war. Scene 4 - Nov 22 - It has been one year since I published my first book. I remembered how amazing it was...There is a lot to say regarding this one year, which I will write about in a different post in the same thread. Scene 5: Usually, after a death in South India, there is a celebration again after two weeks when all the relatives gather together. On Nove 23rd, my wife reminds me that it was going to be on November 26th on sunday.. But I totally forgot that the German sannyasins were coming that date. On the evening, I got a reminder from the Osho sannyasin. Scene 6: On Nov 25th, my whole family with all my relatives think that I am crazy and worthless. Lots of things happened on that day which led my relatives to get convinced that I am someone who needs a lots of advice. Scene 7: On Nov 26th, the German sannyasins come to my home town with my book and I became the center of attraction of my whole town. Everyone starts praising me. That is when all of my relatives came to know that I had written a book. My dad feels totally embarassed. We ended up taking a lot of pics: Scene 8: I also meet an old friend who I saw about 16 years before...It was another turning point in the story. Scene 9: Until last year, all of my relatives thought that I am the most useless guy among the relatives. But they now have the totally opposite idea.. And when I posted the following post today in Facebook, it brought me smile. 10) When I look at the whole thing today, I see how karma works very clearly. I see why things happened in my life the way they did. At every moment, trillions of karmic action is going on and interacting with us, creating many deep links among people. I also discovered that there are secret keys which lie behind the names of people who have been close with me the whole life. The whole discovery was amazing .. One 28th Nov, in the morning, as my face was drenched with tears of bliss and wonder, I was explaining how the whole thing was a Eureka moment to my wife; that is when I also remembered that the old friend that I met recently actually worked with me in a company for two months.. It was my first job and the name of the company was 'Eureka Forbes'.. By the way, the name of the german Sannyasini (the women) is Vedanta Kabiro! (to be continued)

I want to have this space to write down things about the complete surrender of everything I know about life and myself to this present moment, the oneness and bliss that flows like a river through my heart. This isn’t a rational choice for a deep voice within calls me everyday to let go of all limitations, and remain steadfast in the seat of my soul even if fears arise. And all of the time, I will take take each step gently, softly and with kindness. Beyond all barriers, dimensions, time, space, forms, thoughts, this world as I see it, beyond the “I” for no reason whatsoever!

@winterknight when i had my last mystical experience as i mentioned you before, i felt like i was in a state pf bliss and i dont want it to leave me at any cost. Nonetheless, that feeling was gone and slowly i was back in my previous state. Since then, i have noticed that i am secretly craving for that state of bliss again, but i dont know how to attain it again. What to do? And why does it leave us?

Aaron - are retreats super important or just useful? I'de LOVE to find out, I believe i may be spiritually gifted so I have not gone on any retreats, i've just mediated in saunas and at home for about a year now. 2: is it really pure clarity, knowledge and bliss 100% of the time? No it's not - when you experience a mystical experience it is like that - but then it kinda fades back to your normal ego, only you feel "different". I believe it's because you have gained consicousness - sometimes you can feel your whole body and mind literally opening up and expanding. It scared the crap out of me at first. One thing I struggle with now is that when i get back to the normal ego i have to kinda stay at a hightened awareness so that I don't "lose it". This requires regular meditation and also fighting with my ego that this whole thing is not real - because you can't really share it with anyone and my ego uses that against me BIGTIME (more ego deception) I have since quit some bad addictions and made radical changes in my life that i KNOW i wouldn't be able to do without this. (because i tried in the past and couldn't) 3: how old are you and how long did it take to get fully enlightened? I'm 48 - and i believe it took me 3-4 years to get enlightened but may have actually been a lifetime since I suffered with OCD, which appears to cleared up like 90 percent now. 4: is it hard to get offended, and do you find yourself living "holier"? Yes totally - as far as being offended -no - i mean it's less hard but mastering emotions will be another task, though i find i have a jump on things now. 5: do you have a relatively "normal" western life, filled with social interactions and a job etc? Yes I do although i'm looking towards possibly making this my life's work in some capacity (transition to writing books or starting a site) 6: Is it true that you possess all knowledge and wisdom when your enlightened? I have only felt 100% infinity twice and it was very fast, but during that time, it's complete bliss and peace. I wasn't deep enough yet to experience the wisdom and knowledge part yet - i have a lot more work. I think i'm only like between 6-7 on the Zen Oxe Stages. Lots more work. I do think i came away more intelligent after these experiences for sure and i feel like i have way more consciousness. I will think of things i never thought of before and think in a totally different way. I

@Nahm it's funny how kids mirror adults acting as if they know and thus take on their problems as their own, while adults might have their problems solved mirroring the kids and thus return to childhood's bliss.

Like this morning, I completely let go of all attachment and I feel overwhelmed with an emotion of sadness that's turning into a euphoric feeling of bliss. But before it comes up, I ruin it by saying either "oh cool, something is happening" or "omg scary", and then it's gone. This always happens. Wish I could have the bliss. ??

@Charlotte That was a huge emotional release you had that you were holding onto. It feels utterly expanding, and helps us connect with the deepest layer of Bliss that is behind all of existence. This state you experienced was temporary, but can be more easily achieved by you now. It’s like coming back after a 10 day meditation retreat: if we engage in our thoughts again, instead of remaining steadfast in our heart center we will return back to our original state. But with practice, we can always stay Heart-centered even when we feel uncomfortable emotionally, or with thoughts pulling at or awareness. That is our power, that no matter what, we can focus our awareness anywhere! In my experience, maybe in yours too, it’s often in emotional discomfort that the biggest past pains or hurts are released. When this emotion arises we can say to our Hearts or the place we feel the emotion(from our Hearts), “It’s okay. I know you were innocently hurt, and not seen for the beautiful light that you are and always have been in the past. I accept that I can’t change those facts, but right now, I instead offer you my entire Love, and will be with you now and forever until you are healed by my embrace. I’m sorry i wasn’t there for you before, i didn’t know the pain you were in, I will be now my love”. You are the Heart. You are this brilliant ball of white light that can heal any emotion or thought or person by holding space for it, and speaking to whatever it is as shown above. We are already perfect, everything that is other than that is here to be healed. We first need to heal ourselves by finding that deepest place within ourselves that is perfect deep with our Hearts, and staying there for as long as possible! Look at the teachings of Ramana Maharshi, Matt Kahn, Papaji, Lincoln Gergar, Meister Eckhart, and nisargadatta maharaj. These people have helped my mind see that the Heart is who we are, and that it has the power to heal everything and transmute all fears and doubts held in the chakras. Speak from your Heart, live from your heart, whatever arises, allow it to take you deeper into the Heart if you want to find peace or have ever wondered what life is, or how you are alive beyond all odds. Btw, I love what you are doing with the Therapist. It was a big break through. More to come, lots of tears and crying, and pain, and then joy again, each time you get stronger. I wish you the best with her, and with your own growing relationship with your Self. Being heart centered attracts more discomfort than usual for brief periods because it is healing the blockages in the chakras. The sun takes time to rise in the morning, and so does your ability to stay heart-centered, so take it slow and consistently like a tortoise. I tried to be the Rabbit at first... no doing that again ?

You speak about Egoic, anyone can do that with a DMT plug. I speak about eternal bliss, harmony, Tantra, Healing, psychic abilities, is what True awakening is. Otherwise, you talking about mindfuckery only. I say this because I have experience, not with lions but with unapproachable dogs, Rotties, Pitbulls, Crazy horses etc. But awakening is not for everyone, is tougher than MR Olympia title, and I've been a powerlifter. The magnitude of the drama is something those who experienced death understand what I'm talking about.

that's an excellent question and i struggled with this myself. But you come to realize that, remember here - you are absolute infinity, which is all possiblities. That means you can actually experience absolute infinity, if even for a few minutes during a mystical experience (higher state of consciousness) You come back as your ego, so you don't lose your ego - only more intelligent and more self-actualized. You are literally grabbing more consciousness everytime this happens and your suffering will start to melt away, literally before your eyes, as time goes on. Your goal is to become so self actualized that you are as close to infinity as "humanly" possible which is going to VERY blissful. Think of it like this - you will have 99.99999 percent bliss and the remaining is suffering. So you can't get rid of the suffering completely until you literally BECOME infinity forever, which is death. In which case i believe you will reincarnate as another being, once again forgetting who you really are, and the process starts all over again - but note, there is no pain anywhere in that because you won't remember who you were before. So that's what Leo means when you have the next xxx amount of years left in life (depending on how old you are) to continue to diminish your suffering to the point where you life pretty much is bliss all the time, and that's as perfect as we can be. You can even experience COMPLETE infinity if only for a time even while you are alive (because it has to be, as being is infinite possiblities) You will also gain 99.99999 percent of infinite intelligence (consciousness) if you can get that self actualized as well. This whole thing is WAY more powerful than you know unless you have been enlightened - and even if you have, that's just the beginning as you have to continue your work until the end. Hope that helps.

Go with them, suicide the old you, your personality, your old patterns. Go with the flow to find bliss.

@Inliytened1 that's so cool. I've started to really get a grip (or lose a grip) of meditation recently, but I'm super pumped to get enlightened. I have a few questions. 1: are retreats super important or just useful? 2: is it really pure clarity, knowledge and bliss 100% of the time? 3: how old are you and how long did it take to get fully enlightened? 4: is it hard to get offended, and do you find yourself living "holier"? 5: do you have a relatively "normal" western life, filled with social interactions and a job etc? 6: Is it true that you possess all knowledge and wisdom when your enlightened?

Enlightenment is beyond the light, beyond the right side. Beyond concepts. Is the drop of all knowledge, pure bliss, pure being, pure action in the present moment. Is similar to the feeling when you hit the wall and trespass it. When you running, and after 1 h the pain is unbearable, then you go with the pain and after 30 min more you could run 3h more, I'm talking about that state. PURE FREEDOM

doing nothing is a movement, call it : weak or strong, as it please you or even both if that's makes you more neutral ! nature as a natural will, king doesn't choose to be king, that's the very nature of the will. we are all slaves too nature, to our nature. and our truth will reflect this very nature, we will remain what we are, because that's how nature made us. in the realm of men the natural will differ, and the truth change for the one who contemplate it. You can be in total peace of mind in the passion of life. Bliss exist in the fight. In some animals, some are born worker, some are born fighters, this doesn't have anything to do with "ego" or "fight struggle". the truth will reflect upon you, exactly the way you're born for. talker will talk, fighter will fight.

@Joseph Maynor he did self inquiry but it hit him hard & fast, I guess that's all it takes, he didn't even know what it was at the time, then he was in a state of bliss for 5 months, no more inner chatter. From why I've read that is.

I learned that there are different categories of meditation: 1. analytical meditation involving conceptual thinking, 2. concentrative meditation with one (mental) object to focus on which leads to concentrative states of bliss and non-conceptualty states and 3. meditation in emptiness (neither thought nor object, letting go of everything). As a rule a practical meditation is often a combination of two or three of these and one often starts with 1 (even if not fully aware of it) before going further to 2 or one starts with 1 before going further to 2 and finally 3. Reason is that one first has to be rightly motivated and then calm down before being able to concentrate single pointedly or even being able to let go of everything. I am assuming that what you call "self inquiry" I would call "analytical meditation".

@Unwiring For the sake of love, the bliss of letting go and reduction of suffering mostly. When I sit down on the meditation cushion I do it for the sake of meditation. For contrast, orange is completely engrossed in the life they have constructed around their egos, also known as maya, and uses meditation for the sake of maya. For example meditating to be able to concentrate harder and more effortlessly on their work or to seem calmer in social interactions to become more accepted. Nothing wrong with it, some people start of that way.

That's a good point. Absence of thoughts in the presence of bliss. That's similar to the recognition of the primordially present.

Its hard to say if youre doing it properly since Im not your mind but if you feel a sense of bliss afterwards youve definitely released some tension. I usually feel very goofy and chilled out after a good session. The most important thing is not calmness though, you will have meditations where you feel super antsy, the important thing is that you are aware of it. Thats all. Aware and awake. Are you directly experiencing the difference between thinking and awareness when you meditate?

@luckieluuke I love Leo and now I feel love for you too! Explore your mind further, for there is much more love and bliss to discover!

@Joshe Such a delightful post. There aren't signs of God, because EVERYTHING is already GOD!!! Penetrate the depth of your own mind even deeper to bath into more beauty and bliss))) Good luck bro!

the mind-body is effected by its environment. Often what happens when awakening happens or progress towards awakening (although this is a illusion of sorts) what your pointing to as the mind-body is effected since awaking up is the same as environmental change, like moving from a violent ghetto to a more tranquil suburb in america. Psychological effects are going to natural happen, since "environmental" triggers/threats have disappeared. So awakening to Self is from a mind-body standpoint a moving to a new location. You see, generally environment is interpreted by mind-body as you use it in a "I'm here", and theres an internal environment to me and an external one called outside (tree's, birds, humans, etc). Awakening turns this on its head and distinctions are blurred, stripped and one can see ultimately there is no outer/inner (along with this awakening there is generally new truths and understanding that strip away psychological suffering as well, generally cultivated through spiritual practice/inquiry). All these factors are a radical moving to a new environment from the Mind-Body stand point. This new environment has new qualities or "new residents" called bliss, expansiveness, calm, thrill, freedom, ease, love, joy. The Mind-Body (personality) then in this apparent new environment are often effected as a result.

Do you have active kundalini, and if so, what insight has it specifically unlocked so far? What is your understanding of bliss?

@SOUL "Contemplate your own experience, couldn't it be said that the deepest and clearest insights come from those moments when the clarity of the unattached awareness is perceiving reality without the veil of self identity obscuring it? How can we have genuine and clear insight with the conditioned self identity filtering our perception? So it seems that attachment doesn't lead to insight but it is liberation, unattached perception, that leads to insight." Definitely moments where that happened. But also ones in which there was confusion happening simultaneously from what I believe your referring to as the self identity. Waking up isn't bound to any particular set of circumstances, emotional, though, feeling of "I" or its cessation, bliss happening, calm happening, love happening, oneness feeling. These all can be metaphorical pointers to the remembrance and understanding of what you are.