Search the Community

@Leo Gura Leo, I love you and respect everything you say, but life has not been the best to me especially through childhood. I have been so broken down and hurt that life lost all purpose, there was nothing that mattered. I was on the brink of suicide when I came across your channel on youtube and it saved me. I have come a long way already and I don't think there is anything else meaningful to do in my life than to pursue understanding. I understand that I need to get a job and shit to feed myself and be able to have a home but I don't know how to fix myself

Could Viji, Sadhguru's wife have been murdered or committed Suicide? Viji was a wife of Jaggi Vasudev (Sadhguru) She died on January 23, 1997. The reason for her death has been explained as mahasamadhi. Mahasamadhi is defined as follows: Mahāsamādhi (the great and final samādhi) is the act of consciously and intentionally leaving one’s body. A realized yogi (male) or yogini (female) who has attained the state of nirvikalpa samādhi, will, at an appropriate time, consciously exit from their body. This is known as mahāsamādhi. This is not the same as the physical death that occurs for an unenlightened person. But did Viji really attain mahasamadhi? Let us first look at her pics. See how she looked during those days and how young she was: People who say that she went to mahasamadhi are just repeating what Jaggi Vasudev said or what others are saying. I have never come across anyone offline or online who was actually present when it happened. It is said that there were hundreds of people who witnessed it, but who knows? Does just saying that over and over again make it true? Even if they were present at the event, what exactly did they witness? Did they actually witness Viji sitting in front of them fully alive, being in meditation and dropping dead finally? Did all this happenbefore their eyes without missing any details or did they hear such a news when Sadhguru Jaggi Vasudev just came out of the room and told them that Viji had left her body? This incident happened many years ago and it is easy to convince people that she went to Mahasamadhi by repeating the story over and over again. If someone wants to believe in something, they just have to hear it over and over again. Because, if everyone in Isha maintains the same thing, you would never question it even though you were not present in that place. Very important point: In our country, nobody cremates someone who attains Mahasamadhi. It is a custom to bury people who attained Mahasamadhi. Now, consider the following points: 1. Viji, Sadhguru’s wife, was cremated; not buried. Why? 2. She was cremated immediately and Jaggi Vasudev didn’t wait for his father in law to reach there in spite of the requests. The request made by Viji’s own father to wait was ignored. Why? 3. His father in law made a police complaint later that he was suspicious about Viji’s death and that Viji might have been murdered. It is true that anyone can make a police complaint and that doesn’t mean that the allegation is true. But the person who made the complaint was not just anyone, but Viji’s own father. Why? Think about it… 4. Viji was very young and her daughter was too young to lose her mother. Jaggi said Viji had planned her mahasamadhi few months before her death. No mother will do such a thing to her child and leave her child orphan. Why would anyone be in such a hurry to leave their body? 5. She didn’t even wait to see the completion of the consecration of Dhyanalinga. As per Jaggi’s own words, he has been working towards the consecration for three life times. He even decided where and in which womb Viji and others close to him should be born. His sole reason for being born this time was to consecrate Dhyanalinga. Even then, she irresponsibly left her body before the consecration was complete though she knew that she was also playing an important part in the consecration by forming an energy triangle with Jaggi and the other woman Bharti. And Jaggi, who had a lot of control over in which womb Bharti and Viji should be born, had zero control over her mahasamadhi. Why? 6. According to Jaggi, Viji was not an accomplished yogi. So it is a mystery how she learnt the art of leaving the body at will. Because, leaving the body at will is something that cannot be done so easily even by the advanced yogis. How did Viji, a normal householder and not an accomplished yogi was able to leave her body at will? 7. According to Jaggi, he has the power to peg people down if they are about to leave their body because of enlightenment. Still, Jaggi was not able to hold Viji down and stop her from leaving the body. Doesn’t it sound strange? Here is an excerpt from the book “‘Enlightenment – An inside story” and here is what Jaggi Vasudev said in that book: more at link https://sadhgurukilledhiswife.wordpress.com

I'm not sure I completely get this. When doing Mahasamadhi you basically stop reincarnating and you become infinite consciousness forever and ever and ever and ever... to infinity and beyond? But if you commit suicide or die you basically merge into it for let's say 1 second and then you reincarnate? Also this kind of assumes that among the divisions of Infinte Consciousness there is kind of a smaller division of consciousness that in this particular dream of God stays costant (kinda like a soul) that keeps though changing itself into different forms burning out karma which is somewhat (still within this dream of God, so not in absolute sense) different from yours which is on its own journey or Trump's or any other thing on this Earth. Do you think this is a decent model of understanding the dynamics of soul and death of how this dream works? Also it's nice that youre mention that a suicidal person might dream an hell, kinda like is souls is going to create an infinite Hell, could you elaborate more on this? Would be cool for you to make a video on reincarnation and on this like dynamics of death within the dream of God, it probably would prevent many of these questions. Also your take on the concept of "soul" Thanks in advance for the answer

Not much other than that with mahasamadhi you consciously decide to become Infinite Consciousness forever. With suicide, who knows what will happen next? You might dream up some hell realm that you go to. A suicidal person will probably not abide in Infinite Consciousness because they're killing themselves out of lack of consciousness to begin with. So they may reincarnate many times or dream up whatever other stuff. Yes, of course, consciousness doesn't go anywhere. But the question remains, what is consciousness gonna be doing? Will it dreaming it's a human? A kangaroo? Or will it is be pure Infinity? How is your consciousness doing? << that's a very important question. Right now it's busy dreaming being human. Lol Try to commit suicide without touching your body in front of 50 people. If you do 100 breakthrough trips of 5-MeO-DMT. You'll know.

For people who have problems of depression and suicidal thoughts its is 100 better to watch Ralph Smart videos that are super uplifting and gives very high vibration. Teal gives zero high energy instead, the way she talks is cold, and doesnt procuce this empathic connection to the viewer. As other mates commented here, acts like a psychopath. Leo's videos about depression are the maximum of radicality a sick person can handle. Killing the ego is inoffensive, compared to encouraging suicide.

@Moreira You have to consider that most people that go as far as to seek help from someone like Teal are already a highly likely group to commit suicide in the first place. You have no idea how many people she saved, I have been part of her community and forum in the past for some time. It's ridiculous to blame this on her. Her teachings are very helpful and to me it makes total sense that as she says, when she puts it into perspective and says suicide is a reset button people actually feel better and are less likely to commit suicide, she would know that better than all of us after what she has been through! You have no idea. Aren't you someone who is very open to these conspiracy theories? Well now consider her a victim of these people talked about in some.

Accusation of her arrive when she discusses very sensitive subjects and tries to give a radical different perspective on it. There is this few people that took suicide of her advice but how many did she save? We cannot know, at least she is courageous to give her point of view. The problem is when some people take her advice and perspective as fact and make a decision on it. She is still a person and can be deadly wrong. Same can be said with Leo, not all people are open toward his journey and would directly judge him for it. I think she was abused sexually and physically by a cult at a young age. But i do not remember correctly what she said about it. Her healing journey from this abuse is the the foundation of her teachings, not all people can handle her advice and probably is not completely healed from the abuse either. I do not know, just my perspective. She got nice videos that resonated with me and sometimes i do watch a few.

Trigger warning: suicide. Meet Teal Swan, the social media guru who some claim may be leading her followers to commit suicide. Teal claims to have "special abilities," validates suicidal feelings & claims to help folks uncover "repressed" memories. One of her first clients did in fact kill herself.

Watch the video 1:50:50 He's having thoughts of suicide. Is this what you are referring to?

I've lost a friend to suicide, the intent is different but the method's the same. It's no laughing matter.

@Leo Gura Why did you not surrender into the Singularity? What did God guide you to do? Interestingly enough I've also had exact those thoughts many years ago when I wanted to commit suicide, and that's what actually stopped me from pulling the trigger.

@Consept Nope, as I said it has truths to it but clinging to them and supporting the system is not the way to go for me at least. I honestly don't see the problem with their christian views and standpoints, it's a natural anti satanism reaction and is higher tier for me than the current satanism. Of course I would encourage these people to get into spirituality asap. Such documentaries have been locked for a very long time, censored all around the web but now the censorship has been lifted a few weeks ago just a day after Trump visited Google. Make of that what you will. Never before could a doc such as Out of Shadows get so viral as it has, 7.3 million views within 6 days on just the main upload, that's insane and it's nothing new actually, but anyone in the past who was trying to do such things has been killed, burried, threatened and censored. As I said people are waking up, this is the Great Awakening. A good way to get to the truth is, exactly the way you proposed all the time, I absolutely agree with you, science hard evidence is great but beyond that we need something that can include even spirituality into this whole picture. And under the current circumstances for me the best way to get to information is just diving deep into conspiracy theories, staying open minded but not believing blindly, then double check from multiple sources, discover correlations and differences between their views, listen to Whistleblowers, look into actions people have done before being assassinated or "committed suicide" and put all of this in correlations, through your intuition making yourself a holistic view, upgrading it as you get more and more information, dismissing things that prove to be wrong and stay open minded to things which might be true. Now do you understand why this all is so hard to communicate? This is the tip of the iceberg. @The observer Maybe you just don't know the right conspiracy theorists or haven't opened up deeply enough to them and happened to be around the silly ones, I don't know. I know that there are silly ones, but I've seen people at least as silly who aren't conspiracy theorists. What does this tell us? Not to label people that easily.

I hear ya.. even though I don't trust Bill Gates either, the evidence against him isn't clear. It's shady, but not enough to make such a bold claim of knowing. There's a better way to ask Leo I think. Ask him about the Jeffery Epstein case. That one is clear as day. He's a proven underage sex offender, perhaps the biggest the world has ever known. All indications point to that he specifically existed to blackmail (and thus control) the wealthiest, most powerful people in the world (E.g. Bill Clinton, Tony Blair, Prince Andrew, etc.. the list is long). He gets arrested in July 2019, and a month later, dies in his prison cell in what was obviously not a suicide, but a direct murder (which was covered up). Look into it yourself. The media? Doesn't talk about it. Almost completely swept under the rug. Same with law enforcement. No proper investigation. Look into it properly if you haven't already. Do you realize how big this lie is? Can you see how many different institutions we're suppose to trust are working to cover this up? How are we not talking about this? I know Leo likes Joe Rogan.. I don't necessary think Rogan is a source for truth, but even he admits freely on his show that if there was ever a clear case of a conspiracy, this is it. Yet nobody talks about it. Why? Ask yourself this question seriously. Consider how deep this lie goes. Have you watched Out of Shadows yet? So ask Leo if this is just another case of delusion conspiracy theorists lacking the ability to see the love?

5.4M views in 4 days. Search "Out of Shadows" on YouTube.. keep scrolling until you find the actual video. To me, the hiding is more peculiar than the act itself. Just like Jefferey Epstein. The media doesn't want to talk about it anymore. He "committed suicide" and now case closed. Think about where this is going. Something has to break. Either mass censorships are coming, or mass revelations. I remain optimistic.

https://afsp.org/suicide-statistics/ I'm looking at these stats and getting around a 3.3% death rate from reported suicides. I assume these numbers can be way off in either direction because of inaccurate attempts and inaccurate deaths by suicide. I might be wrong but I would guess my own success rate would be carefully planned and 100%, but who knows. I'm honestly wondering though if the thought of pain is the main reason people are unsuccessful? I often wished of a state of Nirvana/nothingness, but do not want to experience the thought of physical pain, the pain of others because of my action, etc.

@Danioover9000 Thanks for asking bro, DPDR seems to be going fine. However reading this thread just now made me almost physically sick, Leo saying that the current present moment im experiencing right now is the only thing that exists. How is this not solipsism. This thread is honestly the most disturbing thing ive ever read and honestly i dont know how i will go on with life now. I guess awakening or suicide is the only option now.

The journey of the heart Post in draft mode. The wounded heart The heart that feels pain and hurt and or anger. The heart that feels betrayal or loss In this state the heart is trapped When your emotions are in a knot, you are experiencing emotional entanglement which I described before in the previous draft posts. In this state you feel stressed. The stress keeps accumulating, you feel confused, unusual, you feel uncertain, your emotions are messed up. You don't feel good at all. This can happen during An argument Childhood trauma Work stress Bad toxic relationships Inability to achieve goals Bullying Getting trolled Ostracization Dehumanization Getting discriminated Having a bad day Financial issues General anxiety Feeling upset Feeling triggered Feeling provoked Feeling harassed Feeling tormented These are just a few examples where the heart is experiencing emotional entanglement which can feel like a knot as though you're tied up or your emotions are in a knot. image here. Once you realize that you are in a knot, its important to unravel this knot as fast as you can so you feel free. Being free is your original state. It takes some amount of time to unravel and untangle and undo the knot and come to the original state of freedom. This is what I call emotional liberation. There is a distinct difference between the words freedom and liberation. Liberation is the feeling of being set free of something. Freedom is an opportunity you have that you can use to do something. Without freedom you cannot get anything done. Without liberation you are trapped. Liberation is an essential component of freedom. Only when you are liberated you can actually have the freedom to do something. Let me explain this with an example.. Let's say you're kidnapped and trapped in a house. You do not have the freedom to leave the house for the first 4 days. Maybe after that you are allowed to go out for a period of 2 hours. But you have to be back home within the time. Or there will be problems. It's your 5th day and now you are free to go out for limited periods of time. This can be considered freedom. You have the freedom to do a certain thing under certain conditions. However you are not completely or unconditionally free. You have certain freedoms only. This is not liberation because you are still trapped in the same house where you don't want to be. You are still in captivity. The only way to feel liberated is to be taken out of captivity. So having freedom does not always mean being liberated. In order to have total freedom it's necessary to be liberated from the chains.. A simple definition of an emotional hostage is someone who is stuck feeling like they don't know what to do next in a particular situation or relationship. Both liberation and freedom are important. So now let's see a situation where you feel liberated but not free An example could be... Imagine you're a rich kid living in your dad's house. You have all the autonomy and everything at your disposal. But there are certain rules around the house. One of those rules is that you are not allowed to bring friends home. Or you are not allowed to drive at a certain hour. You are allowed a stipulated amount of money only when you specify your requirements in such a way they meet the criteria. This is an example where you feel liberated or you're liberated but not free. You aren't technically being confined or severely restricted but you are to follow rules and conditions to get what you want. Now these rules can be very trivial and easily dealt with or they can become a headache. When there are too many rules you essentially lose your freedoms. It's a covert way of taking away your freedom. You can free to do things but you are handicapped when something needs to be done. This is like you're free to walk but your legs are injured. You are free to fly but your wings are cut. This is not freedom nor it is imprisonment. It is basically "Control" not necessarily hostage or imprisonment but control. Your motions are controlled. Conditions are being put where none are needed. One way of putting this is... The previous situation can be described as "you're not allowed" And this situation can be described as "you're allowed but you will get this only if you fulfill the conditions" Both look same but they are not. The situation where you're not allowed you cannot do anything at all. Let me explain this further. Let's say you're in a third world country under a totalitarianism or dictatorial regime and you are not allowed to leave the country. You are not even allowed to leave your city. You are only supposed to do what the regime tells you. Basically you are denied your humanity. You are not allowed freedom of speech. So if you speak up, you will be imprisoned or face harsh punishment. This is a case where you need liberation (as well as freedom which will be needed subsequently) Now let's take the case of a person in a first world country. You're allowed to go wherever you want. You can leave the country if you want. You have been given your basic liberties. (statue of liberty comes to mind) but let's say you needed an important medicine and you don't have your prescription then you won't get it. There can be a lot of bureaucratic tape that must break through in order to just get daily necessities. But you do have the liberty to leave the country anytime and you can do whatever you want with your life because you are liberated, not exactly free but liberated. Your freedoms are still bound to conditions. Ill also include some portion on emotional freedom. To have emotional liberation, you need to cut through the knot that your heart is entangled in. Breaking the knot. Breaking the knot and setting the heart free is not an easy job. The first step in this direction is realization and awareness. You need to be aware that you are being held hostage to your emotions. You need to be aware that it's okay if you are being held hostage to your emotions as long as your emotions are happy and wonderful and supportive. But when you have negative emotions, things don't look great. Being aware that you are gradually falling into the trap of the emotional knot is the key. This knot is slowly getting stronger and firmer and even more convoluted and intricate. It can reach levels of complexity that are impossible to unravel. Before this happens, you need to break and undo the knot as fast as you can. Once you see yourself trapping into the knot, you have to back off from the situation and the emotions arising out of that situation. So let's say your classmate is bullying you and you feel angered and provoked. You need to be able to be calm and watch how your emotions are slowly enveloping to form that destructive knot. Before this happens, take action, back off from the situation, take time to gather yourself together and keep your emotional constitution intact and healthy. Don't let it form knots or get disrupted. One way is to break the knot early on during its formative stages. You can do this quickly and instantly. However, not all knots are this easy. They don't just go away with simply a thought or action. Some knots are formed over years and years of emotional abuse and psychological abuse as in an adult who has experienced child abuse during their formative years. This will need a lot of unpacking to be done. Also if you have not exactly suffered emotional abuse, you could have suffered years and years of tremendous emotional stress. Examples of emotional stress can be Bad relationships Too many fights in a relationship Too many fights in a family Financial problems Overbearing boss Bullying at college, school or workplace Stalking Narcissistic abuse from parents or authority Abuse at a church or cult An incident of racism, discrimination or humiliation which is public Living with a bipolar or mentally ill person Working as a nurse, doctor, psychiatrist, counselor or social worker Working in law enforcement dealing with crimes, criminals and crime victims families. Working as an actor in heavy duty emotional roles Suffering from a mental illness for years Listening to emotional music as a bad habit Constant crying or having severe loss of emotional control Having suffered parental neglect Drug addiction Raised in a violent neighborhood Exposed to some form of violence in formative years Abuse by a schoolteacher like physical beating or sexual or pressure or bullying Cyberbullying Having encountered suicide in the family or friends circle Having encountered single or multiple deaths of persons or pets in the family or friends circle Unable to cope with the loss of a person or pet Failed marriages and divorce Unable to cope with the divorce of parents Suffered loss of home or resources in an earthquake or disaster Suffered homelessness at some point in life Suffered PTSD due to one or a specific set of incidents Being wrongfully arrested, evicted, sent to prison or jail. Suffered sexual assault in the street or by family, neighbor, boyfriend or friend. Being sent to military at young age Military associated PTSD because of bad memories The list goes on and on. Over years these triggers and stressor build up and cause extensive damage to the heart and body. They accumulate. Remember, there'll always be some factor behind your emotional stress. It may or may not be on the list but it'll be something that is causing you stress. It's important to isolate these triggers and factors one by one and deal with them individually. One important word to consider here is the word avoid Some of the stressors are avoidable, not easily but still avoidable. Like for example you could give up a drug habit, you could counteract bullying either by a formal complaint or by switching to a different school. Whenever it's avoidable, Avoid.. When it's not, then you need to find strategies to minimize damage, strategies to cope with the situation, strategies to escape the situation, strategies to find a resolution to the situation if escape is not possible or unwanted or unhelpful. One example could be contacting child protection services or social services when you are stuck in a dysfunctional abusive relationship with your parents /family /neighborhood /church/cult etc. There is always a road ahead, a twist, a turn, a rope to hold on to during a desperate period, there is always a way to cope or get out and escape further damage or a way to find ultimate freedom. So there is two way approach to the problem of emotional stress Avoidance Resolution Dealing with Emotional Damage Once you have successfully avoided or resolved the problem of emotional entanglement or removed the stressor and untangled the knot, you have found the way to emotional liberation. Also explain emotional freedom blockage. emotional liberation different from emotional freedom and emotional and emotional entanglement, emotional distress, emotional damage, emotional abuse, emotional hostage, emotional independence, emotional healing, emotional disruption or emotional blockage. The focus of this particular post is more on emotional entanglement and emotional liberation and healing from emotional damage Dealing with emotional damage. Once you have successfully achieved emotional liberation, the next focus needs to be on dealing with emotional damage. This means healing the emotional constitution and bringing it back to its original state and then working towards the Regeneration phase. This phase is basically the Healing Phase. The earlier phase was the struggling phase or Coping phase. In this phase you need to start your journey towards a recovery and a full rebound. Now obviously you have PTSD symptoms and emotional distress symptoms EDS, you have unresolved aggression, and a bunch of symptoms arising from the situations you escaped/survived. Now it's time to get rid of these symptoms and remove the emotional agitation and replace it with happiness and a sense of peace. Also it's time to get your energy reserves back. I'll call them Emotional Energy Reserves. These have been depleted during your time of stress. It's time to fill them back. To replenish. Energy reserves are vital for motivation and stimulation to live life. These are what make you want to explore, have relationships, want a family, go to work, live your best life, create joy and pleasure and they create a natural enthusiasm to live life. When you are in a state of depression and emotional recession and emotional stress, these emotional energy reserves get greatly depleted. This causes agitation, nervousness, losing the will to live, suicidal ideation, and a general state of apathy. You just don't feel like doing anything. You don't think anything is useful... Healing the emotional constitution This is the phase where you get the emotional energy reserves back. You focus on replenishment. There are ways to heal the emotional constitution back to its original un-maladapted or unimpacted form, unadulterated form Some of the ways. Laughter therapy Focusing on a sense of achievement Achieving baby goals Taking baby steps Lot of sleep and adequate rest. Music Meditation Walking in the woods Talk therapy and venting Psychological therapy (professional) Change of place. Relocating Positive visualization Going on a vacation to an island Watching relaxing and comedy movies Positive distraction Exercise Massage Spa therapy Taking care of nutritional needs. Supplements for depression and other issues Making new friends Journaling Avoiding toxic people Taking care of the body and physical needs Building a robust health Listening to ASMR Nature therapy Listening to nature sounds Surrounding yourself with positive uplifting caring supportive people Laughter therapy Yoga Picking a hobby Dancing Walking meditation Spending time with pets Helping other people Staying happy Loving the self Staying peaceful Being happy with little things Keeping small goals Living in simplicity Retail therapy (don't let this be an addiction) Comfort food (just like retail therapy this is only okay for a short period) Sex (sex is the most powerful drug) Driving Self love Self care Confronting and Labeling emotions Labeling situations Metta meditation Playing games Being a part of an organization or community Psychedelics Spending time with family and friends Gratitude journal Humour Positive affirmations Building self esteem Setting Boundaries Rewarding self Seeking spirituality Prayers Finding love through God Growing in love Destroying and discarding negative emotions Looking and appreciating the beauty of life Creating the fountain of love and positive emotions in life Energy healing methods or Energy based healing methods like Chi Gong, Reiki, Chakra, acupuncture, etc Dealing with Emotional Damage.

Check this out. It's crazy that a relatively non deadly disease has shook us so much. If not from this, its very possible we could hit another recession or even depression soon. Even though generally the world was having less crime, and the economy was better than ever, it still seemed that people were becoming worse off, data showed increasing suicide, fear and unhappiness, I believe this manifested itself in things like the rise of Bernie Sanders and Trump. But if that happened when we were statistically better off, I wonder what will happen if things get bad. I know Eckhart Tolle exploded in popularity after 9/11 and the 2008 recession, could society struggling lead to a larger spiritual awakening?

I don't argue with that. That's why set and setting also play a role. But level all these out and you find that "effective/breakthrough doses" don't vary much. For example: I was close to committing suicide on my first medium-high psychedelics dose (ayahuasca) because of wrong internal believes (beside the intense drug-induced fear): I thought aliens would appear and torture me to death to prevent me from divulging my discoveries (yes, I know, WTF? See my signature). So why not kill myself instead of going through all that shit?

Also Grof disagrees about the "personal sensitivity level" you and Leo argue about. He did many trials and discovered that these drugs affect mostly the brain, and therefore doses do not vary much from person to person. I suspect Leo doesn't want people to commit suicide on the come-up of a proper rectal breakthrough dose when he says 30 mg rectal 5-meo is enough for him.

There is an irony, a cosmic humor that rings with a deep thunder in my being when I see people mention "nothing matters". When people take the time to express this notion, it is driven from a position of contemplation. A dedicated devotion to questioning and deciphering, making attempts to find reason. They have invested critical thought, passionate emotion. Why? Because it matters to them. They can say nothing matters but it is a false narrative. If it didn't matter time and effort would have never been spent expressing it. The fact that it is given attention means it matters to them. Even if nothing mattered, it would still matter to them. They are wrapped up in thoughts about it, feel the need to express it, they are clearly emotionally invested. You can't say nothing matters with a straight face... If you mean it... Then.. “There is but one truly serious philosophical problem, and that is suicide.” - Camus I have walked the rim, dipped my toes within its reflection, and carried shame for my inability to proceed; I am grateful for such weakness... Nothing matters, the depths of this well; it is deep..

Sexual attraction and sex are two different things. Romantic attraction has a beautiful essence to it. It's like magic. Like two magnets pulling each other. There's something about a person's face that attracts you to them. In the way they speak, the way they make you feel. Romantic attraction is like charisma, a spell that's difficult to resist. Every time you see that person you want them, you desire them, you wanna play games, tickle their fantasies, it's a thrill. Often times romantic attraction causes partners to be passive aggressive with each other, each teasing the other, playing silly games, intensifying the feelings of craving, the constant push pull, fighting and making up after, and surrendering to their temptations. Romantic attraction is a temptation hard to resist. It's very different from trying to resist the temptation to buy an expensive car or that thing you cannot afford, it's a different feeling. Resisting or compromising with it can cause feelings of intense melancholy and dissociation. Not having the lover you so desperately desire can lead to feelings of emptiness and even suicide. Love is like a fever. It grips you. It's a spell and when you are under this spell, your heart wants what it wants, and your joy is fulfilled in the arms of the lover.

Am I allowed to end the physical existence of me? Commit physical suicide? Aught I?

@Nexeternity So Leo is still seeking then? Ramaji mentioned it recently actually that Leo isn’t in Non-Duality, therefore, isn’t awakened, can’t have it both ways. And, yes, very rarely are people asked their age when psyches are recommended, they just are recommended, I have no problem with psyches, my issue is with reckless recommendations to people too young for them. As I clearly stated I am not talking badly of psyches, they are great medicines for the right people, at the right time and when used responsibly of course. Never once did I dispute that. Of course “responsible use” is quite a blanket term, to me using a synthetic chemical weekly in quite high doses isn’t responsible, to others it may be. Maybe a safety post should be made on Psyches regarding the points you made, as I do see them recommended without any age questions. Ive even seen them recommended after by someone after they said they almost committed Suicide during a trip on here. My main point, is that I’m yet to see any awakened beings who are proponents of this 5MEO path, that’s all. Who knows, in a decade there could be 1000s.

I have had a lot of difficulty with moralizing myself, but in recent years my moralizing faded more and more. My main cure was self observation. I noticed how I was manufacturing my own guilt and how it made me hate myself. This is how I realized that I was lying to myself in my moralizing as I was hyper rational as well. One thought I never believed was that I should kill myself under any circumstances. First, by realizing how much moralizing hurts, you build a vision of how you would think and behave if you loved yourself. This can lead to you seeing that evil is created by your mind as you imagine values to compare yourself against. This applies to moralizing against others as well where you deny your similarities and look righteous. This further exposed the lies in moralizing. Secondly, you can realize that guilt is a dysfunctional survival strategy. Guilt is ineffective for achieving your goals and it drains your energy. This is not resourceful and I used guilt in order to get myself to act in a way that most people found pleasing and I still struggled. I constantly made people feel uncomfortable anyway. Finally, I often equated my immoral thought I had to the act itself. This false equivalency lead to me beating myself up more. Nowadays instead of pushing thoughts away, I observe what the thought is and without beating myself up, I explain how this thought can lead to moral anxiety. I notice the fear and judgement of builds up in me and if I love myself, then I would not do this to myself. The main cure is self observation, realizing the pain you cause yourself, and ultimately that your moralizing is not true, it is just self generated suffering. I don't mean to repeat spiritual teachings you heard, this was my direct experience from self reflection. I have become more and more disinterested in moralizing, and suicide caused by drowning ourselves in guilt is no longer a problem.