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About ElenaO

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  • Birthday May 29

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    Seattle, USA
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  1. Are you planning on having a family? Why/why not? Do you want to have kids?
  2. Oooh, it's been so long since I posted here. A lot of things happened since then. I moved in with my boyfriend, who is now my fiance. But the biggest change and surprise of this year so far is that I am pregnant. I had no idea this could happen so easily, I thought it would be a long journey. What did I know. However, all is not easy. Now that I am 8 weeks in, I feel horrible. In fact, I felt horrible starting week 5. I am constantly nauseous, often tired to exhaustion, and even depressed. Who would have known. That was the least of my expectations. I thought it's hard to have a baby, but not while the baby is in you. It proves to be a hard process for which I wasn't prepared. Not sure I can be prepared. Sometimes it feels so bad, that I just want to die. And just a month before I was so motivated and excited about everything. This makes me realize that I am far from being able to embody all the practices I learned during my meditation. I can some, but often I am just depressed and don't want anything. What surprises me most is that no one talks about this hard path some women have to take. The problem is there is no way to tame this nausea. You just have to suffer. So much for the "most wonderful time of your life", that I hear from so many people when they talk about pregnancy. I call it BS.
  3. Listening Rubbing the back Giving complements Smiling Helping out with annoying things Sharing high quality time
  4. I am back from a 17 day vacation and I have no motivation to do anything. I hate it all: the city, the apartment, the work. I just want to do nothing. I want to be, not do. Honestly, my day is filled with so much doing of unimportant, of just sustaining your life. So much resistance again. I thought having a vacation would help me reenergize and want to do even more. Apparently not. I really want to go to another place and take a break from Seattle, from the apartment. I may.
  5. @allislove thanks for your input!
  6. Downtown Seattle, WA
  7. Thanks. Well it sucks. It pisses me off especially because it's so unfair. But maybe I need to dig deeper and see how these men are actually "contributing".
  8. Thanks for suggestions. I've been doing meditation for years and I agree it does have an influence on your life overall. What I don't understand is the fact that the desire would fade away? If you see an unfair situation, how would it? And why should it fade away? It's not like I yearn to get this promotion. It's more about making it right. Why should I be getting less and be content with it? Let's be honest, we are still humans.
  9. @allislove Thanks. However, I feel like you consider that I am some sort of monster that does not realize what she's doing. I am pretty conscious and I won't be hurting anyone, trust me.
  10. Thanks. Oh I do my spiritual work daily. But frankly it has almost nothing to do with the skills of getting ahead in our orange world. You may meditate all you want but it won't change the fact that you'll need to interact and work with others. I am kind. Obviously I won't now turn into some shark I am me. Just gotta be more cunning ?
  11. Oh I am with you this one. I think I totally have a shadow there too, because I honestly hate all these games with all my heart and resent all the people that play them.
  12. Perhaps they didn't make it past Orange if they haven't climbed it? Unless of course they are entrepreneurs or doing something else than working in a corporate world. Honestly, I am still pretty shocked it hasn't worked and not sure I understand why it hasn't. I'll need to read some literature on that.
  13. Well, the one that's missing is strategy, career growth, and playing politics. These I definitely do not have. With the rest I am doing pretty well.
  14. For obvious reasons. To get more money and have a better job, more responsibility, more autonomy, more authority. While I am sitting at the same position others are getting better pay. It pisses me off, especially because they are not better at the job. It's just they know how to navigate this. I find some men to be particularly great at this. Of course I do my morning meditation. Spiritual practice is not something I am trying to improve here. It's stages above. I am trying to clog all the holes that are left from Orange so I can be ready to move up the spiral.
  15. I don't think I understand what you are saying here. Why do we have managers at all if they are not going to cater to us? I mean I am the one who implements things and makes stuff work, their job is to observe how things are going and take appropriate actions. Yes, I meant moving up the Spiral, but also moving up in the career ladder as well. That's a strong Orange value.