I don't care what people say, women DO NOT like masculine men

[EternalForest]

I also journaled a LOT after I wrote this, and maybe getting more vulnerable might help you understand better:

All I was saying was that the moment I let loose with girls, I get reprimanded and told "you can’t say this" or "you can’t say that". And even with girls online when I would get a little bit too cocky or I would get a little too critical, they would just delete me. So I have to be careful what I say, but then nothing ever goes deeper than the surface. Therefore, there’s no deeper connection. So it’s a vicious cycle. And one clarification: I’m not being neutral for them. That’s just my natural state, but for whatever reason men respond better. Men take my neutrality as inviting and then allow me to be uncensored, while women take my neutrality as hostile. 

Everyone says that I should just use mutual friends, but I don’t feel comfortable with that because if there’s a breakup, then it’s gonna ripple through the entire friend group. So the last thing I wanna do is ask my friends if they know anyone who’s single. More and more I’m entertaining the idea of the matchmaker. Before I didn’t wanna do it because I thought why would I pay someone to find someone? 

Now the way I see it, I’m gonna be paying all this money on these online dating apps anyways. I’d rather give that money to a professional. People have been doing it for thousands of years. If anything, the online dating is the thing that’s foreign. Even back in the times of the Renaissance and the Victorians they had matchmakers. 

Even still, I don’t like the idea that my autonomy is outsourced to another source. And I don’t want my intentions to be misread. Because what happens if I’m stoic with the matchmaker…And they connect me to a stoic woman, but then the moment I open up, we find it’s the wrong match. Or the counter example — if I’m expressive in the beginning, but then once she gets to know me, she finds that I’m not expressive enough.

At the end of the day, my feelings are expressed inside and a woman will never get a reliable read without ample time. It reminds me of Tony and Junior from Sopranos (yes I'm comparing myself to a man with dementia because that's how clueless I am with dating):

Tony Soprano: so, let’s “assume” you didn’t know what you were saying, that you’re forgetting you’re saying shit over and over.
Junior Soprano: yeah?
Tony Soprano: "why’s it gotta be something mean? Why can’t you repeat something good? Don’t you love me?"

The girls are Tony and I’m Junior. Even with my lack of knowledge, my intentions are still questioned. Doesn’t matter how much I love them or I care about getting to know them, I'm somehow always framed as the overly masculine, emotionless robot.

[joeyi99]

Women are attracted to grounding energy

[Salvijus]

This is what you sound like. 

Relationship is not a science for you to figure out, it's an art for you to plunge into and lose yourself. 

[Sugarcoat]

6 minutes ago, Salvijus said:

This is what you sound like. 

 

😭😭😭😂😂😂

[Salvijus]

Just now, Sugarcoat said:

😭😭😭😂😂😂

 

[NewKidOnTheBlock]

I wonder when people will finally get tired of all this femininity/masculinity autism. It's getting a bit tiresome to me as far as I'm concerned, of course it is undeniable that they have to exist in some form, even if you try to deny their existence or you are unaware of the terms, even then it's pretty obserbable that people are still trying to max out in those traits depending on whether they are a man or a woman. But still, at this point it's starting to be a bit of a brainrot

[Natasha Tori Maru]

11 hours ago, Schizophonia said:

Behind every misunderstanding or paradox we perceive lies a ego crisis, with the potential to either suppress it or conversely to experience the emotion.

It's always the same.

Suppression is what I see. 99% of the time.

[Leo Gura]

If by masculine you mean stoic, serious, unexpressive, unemotional, untalkative, and logical -- then yes, this will kill all your results with women.

Edited 1 hour ago by Leo Gura

[Schizophonia]

11 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

If by masculine you mean stoic, serious, unexpressive, unemotional, untalkative, and logical -- then yes, this will kill all your results with women.

These are traits often found in people with low testosterone, those taking neuroleptics, or those with autism.
Men tend to be more stoic, but this is often a form of detachment; testosterone has a similar effect on the central nervous system to ketamine or opioids; therefore, you are also supposed to be fun and reassuring.
If that's not the case then this is the first explanation.

 

[Leo Gura]

48 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

These are traits often found in people with low testosterone

No. This is how a serious man is.

Think of a Zen master. That is a real man. Not some pickup clown.

The truth is that a real man doesn't make his life around chasing club bitches.

A real man does such serious things that he doesn't have time for games, flirting, and galavanting with drunk fools.

Marcus Aurelius, that is a real man. These pickup guys are truamatized sex-obssessed children.

Edited 6 minutes ago by Leo Gura