bazera

There's a lot of peer pressure around having kids. I'm 30, and most people I know keep asking when I'm going to get married and have children, saying it's already time and that I need to hurry for some reason. It's getting pretty annoying. I don't want to fill my life with such major attachment and the added responsibility and survival pressure that come with raising a family. I also don't know how to explain that to people who haven't really thought much about those tradeoffs. How do you handle that kind of peer pressure, if you've experienced it? People around me are starting to have children because "it's time" or because it's simply what everyone does. I'm sure many of them find a lot of meaning in it, but I'm not sure they've really considered the tradeoffs.

What are your favourite David DeAngelo courses? I found a list of titles for his courses: https://daviddeangelo-pua.blogspot.com Which one would you guys suggest getting first?

I think when he said these things being simple, he meant that sarcastically, because he follows that with a list that realistically takes many decades of work.

Which ones would you suggest? Some principles don't get old that quickly. What does more recent science suggest?

Do you think that's even possible and worth exploring? What can be some of the ways that isn't yet known to us? So not yoga, not meditation, not breathwork, but something new? I understand we might not have answer to that yet, but still.

I wonder what it feels like when you're a aspiring actor looking for roles and seeing Pedro Pascale or Tom Cruise playing in their gazillionth new movie. But new talent pop-up here and there, like a girl from Obsession, Inde Navarrette. Didn't like the movie much but she played well.

Do we really need to be seeing Matt Damon, Anne Hathaway, Tom Holland, Zendaya, etc in every fucking movie on the market? I was rewatching Lost lately, and what I noticed was that most of the cast were new people, not famous actors and actresses when it came out, and that somehow made it better because the characters were more believable and emotional, at least for me. Now I have to watch spider-man and his girlfriend but in ancient Greece 😒

I think your list covers most important ones. What I'd add is meditation with some concentration object, developed as a meta-skill that has positive effect on other things that assists cognition. Also maybe a deliberate practice into some challenging skill either deepening a current skill-set or taking up something new like musical instrument or drawing or something like that.

I have the same problem, and I'm getting into audio books more and more lately, but I also feel like I lose some information when I listen to a book compared to reading it, but I'm willing to make that trade-off because I can realistically finish one audiobook a week and that's good enough pace for me as far as listening to books goes. I listen to them while driving, cooking, sometimes when eating, also a huge chunk gets listened to in gym, especially during light cardio. But there are books that can't just be listened away like that. For example, as you've also mentioned, Ralston's books. Those are very dense and require allocating time to actually sit down and go through it. But books like "The Req Queen" or "Dating essentials for men" can be listened to, without losing much. Also notice that when you read physical book, you might also not retain all the information, mind still wanders, stuff gets lost, etc. You retain parts that are relevant for you in a given moment. I find that same for audio books. Of course you can't just listen to some math textbook casually, same goes for more complex books like as I mentioned Ralston, or Wilber or some dense philosophical books. But most books aren't like that. What I've also found useful is when I'm listening to an audiobook, I'll upload pdf of epub version of it to some AI and ask it questions, ask it to summerize material, give me the main points to not miss anything major. I use that together with listening, and I believe that ensures that I don't miss something important due to mind wandring in the middle of an audiobook. But again, I can't do it with Ralston's Whereof One Cannot Speak. Each page was too valueble to just flippantly listen away. I needed my full attention there. So, to summerize, I think you can use audiobooks + AI assistence for summeries (if you want it) for most of the books in your list, and the most important ones I'd read it physically. You can also start listening to it and if you find that you fell like you're losing too much of the content and most of it comes in one ear out of the other, you can always switch to physical version or pdf/epub.

@KaRzual Do you feel like you need more experience with other women, exploring femininity / sexuality with others without life-long commitement first?

Just rewated Lost. This song is beautiful.

Yes me too, but how will new people become seniors without going through that junior experience first. Strange times.

Good point.

Yeah, but I don't think that crash would affect usage of AI tooling in software development. All serious developers already understand that it's not AGI and that supervision is important. If crash actually happens, it would make that even more clear for everybody else.

@Natasha Tori Maru Yes, there are still lots of challenges, but the nature of those challenges has shifted. In one sense, it has become easier because the technical aspects have become easier. If you used to struggle with coming up with algorithms manually, an LLM can now help you do that. But in another sense, it has become harder because you now need a much stronger understanding of software architecture. That's more difficult to develop because it requires taking responsibility for ambitious, large-scale projects with many moving parts. So yes, the challenge is still there, it has just changed.