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Great Blog post on "But Why Christianity?" It's the first solid comparative religion analysis I have seen from you. I would like to give some other interesting angles to see this from. Religion in its purest sense is an Awakening technology designed to achieve a particular set of states of consciousness which are assumed to be "the highest, most complete or best" There's an ideological and epistemically ignorant way of going about religion. There's also a proper way of framing religion where it becomes indispensable for building the blocks towards Absolute God from where you'll have to burn the inferior human base. In this sense, I find that religion for the proper mystic and philosopher allows delving into prior experiences from saints and derive principles and access to certain states of consciousness. For example, it would have taken me a lot to decipher myself the "Tao" it's a particular insight and consciousness property, yet it is reflected in Taoism, you can use the technology and hopefully not get entangled too much, get the superb Tao and deconstruct from your mind Taoism. I know I wouldn't be where I am if I wasn't standing in the shoulder of giants, like Sri Anandamayi Ma, Shivapuri Baba, Adidam or you Leo. To arrive to you, there was an unbroken study of mystics and religious techniques that holistically built up to higher levels of synthesis and purity and in such levels to the deconstruction of masters, religions and the labyrinthine Mind of God to break free into Infinite Consciousness. Having said this, I'd like to shift towards a conversation about being human. I've become aware that I share many Awakening values with you and that they also have lead me towards a furthering of what makes me human, towards more evolved alien mature ways of cognition, behavior and consciousness. In hardcore introspection I feel there's something out of tune, and in some way I see it also in you. I'm talking about such subtle matters that it's hard to even make my point across. Okay, let's assume to go hardcore in the opposite way of transcendentalism and limitlessness towards insane grounding and integration into the human frame. I've awoken so much and matured so much that my primal and animal humanness has been shadowed. I'm aware of the human frameworks and jails, yet I don't want this awareness to make me lose the connection, love, integration and joy of being a basic chimpanzee cleaning its ass in the jungle.

I realized I was taking for granted the fact that you are the only teacher who hasn’t crystallised on a single rigid model. I haven’t had the opportunity to thank you for being a constant source of epistemic novelty. It is what has largely prevented me from falling down formulaic model dynamics. Your alien awakenings were a really strong perturbation to my sense-making and a piece in the intellectual cascade that inspired the algorithmic improvements that made me rich.

I think I heard Leo say that in one of the videos, not a forum post. But regardless, the reason it didn't work is outlined in a recent blog post – God will not grant local/personal miracles (which morphing into an alien certainly qualifies as a miracle), not without very exceptional circumstances anyway. For that same reason Leo's self-healing endeavors didn't succeed – although that doesn't mean the health problems are permanent, maybe they are, or the time for healing hasn't come yet for whatever reason, I don't know. Virtually the only way God will grant a local miracle is if it serves the highest Love and Good. An alien transformation on camera doesn't serve any such purpose, at worst as OP points out it could cause chaos, or simply be a tool for Leo to prove something, maybe give an ego boost, in other words a selfish, or at least not entirely selfless motive. Thus far I've only been able to manifest one miracle (that's a long story), and I know it worked only because the desire came from a completely selfless place. Even if you think your motives are pure, God knows for sure, and if there's any trace of selfishness in there, that's a no-go. In several instances I thought if only X would happen, I could do so much good for the world with it, but that was a self-deception, completely transparent to God. Similarly, Jesus was able to perform miracles because those served a purpose. A sort of crude reasoning from God deciding to grant Jesus those powers would go something like "If he can heal the sick and walk on water, people will take him seriously, and will listen to his message of Love, thus improving the world". Of course those teachings have over time been corrupted into the ideology of Christianity, but that too is part of the larger evolutionary design. Just as any local miracle is ultimately indistinct from the "Just One Miracle" of God's existence, they're baked into it. It also works the other way around, I've become conscious of how I was given a certain ailment which I managed to cure only after learning some important lessons and going through many years of suffering. Same with the many difficulties and annoyances, past, present, and future, they all exist to grow and better me. Anyway, that's my 2¢ on the matter, and also a long-winded way to express a powerful insight/perspective: everything happens for a reason, don't fool yourself into thinking you know better than God, instead develop a trusting relationship with it, and your life will feel so much lighter and enjoyable.

Hi Leo. This comment made me worry about your safety. Leaving the alien stuff aside, did you notice anyone wanting to do harm to you? Did you receive threats? I mean, you never did wrong to anyone. You don't seem the kind of guy to have enemies. Who are those bad faith actors you mentioned? Please be safe. I personally love you. Without you I am certain that I'd have been dead for many years now.

See this is what makes me think you never thought that you would be able to make the video. If you care about your life posting a video of yourself transforming into an alien is one of the most dangerous things you can do. It just doesn't make sense.

It's not about being a freak or human understanding, but about the world plunging into chaos upon seeing your transformation. How could you even contemplate sending it out? Being the biggest freak in the world would be detrimental to your survival. Dutch colonists used to put South African women with "freakishly" big asses in cages like they're animals in a zoo. Being a freak is not about being misunderstood by lowly humans, its about the survival of you and your family. Transforming into an alien would get you killed by evangelicals, hunting you down with guns, for in their mind they've seen a real life demon transformation. Do you really not get what I'm pointing at here?

If you experienced whatever Leo did, you'd have done the same thing. Have you had a reality shattering experiences? Becoming an Alien feels absolutely real in that state. As real as the feeling of your feet of the floor right now. Not defending the claims he made, but if you don't know the nature of such an experience you would be strawmanning Leo.

Okay, but did you not think of the ramifications of that if it would work, that history would change in an instant, and you would be the biggest freak in the world? that people would go looking for you? If I thought I could transform into an alien, i'd keep it a secret purely for my survival. Thinking of sharing it is more bizarre than thinking you are able to do it IMO. This is my last question. I'll stop hammering about it, I understand it's not the most gentle way of going about it, but the scope of the claim does warrant this amount of scrutiny.

I haven't, but I am assuming Leo was posting while sober about his alien transformation (posting sober is a rule of the forum), so it doesn't make any difference. I'm extremely open minded but also extremely skeptical. The deconstruction of sober consensus reality is something entirely different than going through insane stuff while tripping. "That said, I myself wonder what makes the manifestation of a psychedelic state into baseline so hard, even with Leo's level of Awakenings. My current understanding is that each level of Consciousness has a certain coherence to it, accessible only from that particular state of Mind." My theory is that the body is in itself a psychedelic. The paradox of realizing that matter is unreal, on psychedelics, is that you are having such an awakening only because you ingested a certain piece of matter, namely the psychedelic chemical. this would explain why Leo doesn't understand why he always comes back even when going into entirely bodyless states. the body still exists because he is it. only upon physical death is your consciousness fully released. Leo still being alive in our dream means it'd be impossible for him to have gone fully away. What do you mean with "each level of Consciousness has a certain coherence to it, accessible only from that particular state of Mind." ? and with this "The "if Jesus/ aliens appeared, you wouldn't even know it" type thing. The dynamics between states, i.e the relative ontology, is highly non-trivial. " ? It seems like you're saying some profound stuff here, but i'm not sure how to read it.

love and empathy is scrutiny of bizarre claims that were never followed up upon. Transforming into an alien is a claim a 1000 times more bizarre than landing on the moon. Afaik, our consensus reality still beholds to the laws of physics. it's precisely what makes the dream feel real. transforming into an alien on camera would break all notions of physics and consensus reality and change history in a second. we would basically start living in an irl fantasy world. its incomparable with landing on the moon. shaming me for criticizing bizarre claims is an awful argument. I don't care the forum is free. conspiracy theories online are also free. Poison is free. I'm actually doing proper scientific inquiry here. The forum is amazing and I'm actually showing it respect by bringing up these topics.

I am not entitled, I just state standards that are normal for students to have. Do you understand how open minded you have to be to even listen to your work about consciousness, God, all that stuff? with your friends and family ridiculing you for it? only for you to state you have literal transformative powers and end up not going through with it, feeling like I should not have been open minded. Thinking that chaos wouldn't ensue around with the release of your transformation video is not a high state of consciousness, but a low one IMO. It's not mockery, but a critique of someone with educational authority, which by default is the relation between a student and teacher. You critiqued Connor Murphy when he went through his stuff (rightfully so), even calling him a zen devil. But with your stuff we're not supposed to criticize, because you project is as mockery? It didn't write it as a mockery, I guess you still don't realize how bizarre those claims were. You never addressed them afterwards, so a critique is warranted. I'm not entitled to any of your work. It's a mistake and a projection to assume that I think I do. When someone is clearly teaching stuff which isn't true and thus misleading, I am entitled to speak out against that though. I am still very interested in what made you think you could transform. It's so radically different than anything you talked about prior, which basically didn't envolve any powers in the dream. Was it just delusion and bad judgement on your part? did you actually reach a stage where such magic was possible? I'm still open minded about it, but since you never addressed it afterwards and just swept it under the rug, is what makes me suspicious and irritated. It's extremely sloppy and treats us as a gullible audience, like we are just some Sadhguru followers listening to our guru and not question his bizarre claims, and just forget it ever happened. It would be epistemologically sloppy of me to not question it. You are a teacher telling us that behind 200 trips lie something that noone has ever seen. If that same person makes an extreme claims of alien transformation and then fails to do it, why would I trust him with going to do 200 trips? It's like a medieval Portugese man pointing at the Atlantic Ocean, and saying there is an entire continent on the other side, and the next day he claims he can turn into a dragon. Why would I still try to cross the Ocean? Why are you mad at me for criticizing your bizarre claims? You were the one who posted about it. You could have easily waited till it worked out or not and then posted it (even though posting it would be insane in itself). Instead you sloppily posted around the forum with insane claims. And you never retracted it or talked about it, what happened during that time. A simple "Forget about what I said, I was in an unstable mental state" would have been enough. By not doing that you are basically saying that it's still possible that your transformation etc might have been valid. So hence my critique. And you're getting mad at me for questioning this? What, I'm supposed to just be a gullible little boy and let you make all these absolutely bizarre claims without questioning you on it? such gullibility goes a 180 degrees in to what you have always taught us. And you criticize Sadhguru's followers and other new age followers for it. Saying it's just mockery feels like gaslighting. And again, we're not talking about some vague claims of telepathy or remote viewing here. We're literally talking about a physical transformation into an alien being here. Hollywood stuff. What do you expect of me? Instantly calling me entitled is such an empty argument. Of course we as your audience are not entitled to anything. Yet we are also the only reason your entire business exists. In the same way you are also not entitled to not be critiqued by your audience. Not critiquing your episode is actually the biggest mockery of your work, because it's like a fly in an otherwise great soup. Leaving the fly in there would be not doing a serious investigation into your work. You have shared some of the best wisdom I've ever read in my life. A critique like this is a respect of your work, not a mockery.

That's why I feel sorry for anyone who still takes him seriously. What's worse, he loves to call everyone a grifter, but he is going to grift his followers into believing they can achieve this 'advanced alien consciousness' by paying for a course. It's quite pathetic honestly.

I missed those videos but Leo is hardly alone in these things. It's like breakingthewall said, the mystical opening leads to many such direct realizations like this. Leo works in the nondual space, but there are a lot of mystical spiritual people who are more in the alien space. Honestly, the idea that you could transform into an alien, I believe you could look in a mirror on psychedelics and see yourself in your Pleadian form, easily. Just the same as you can look in the mirror and see the faces of your ancestors morph across your face. Now that, I have seen first hand. Could I replicate it on camera? I don't think so. But I have watched many many people claiming to channel aliens, and many of them actually LOOK alien like in their facial structure and hair cuts. And it's just like Leo said, these things are simultaneously accessible to the mystic, and too weird to ever translate into a sober human lifestyle that could become commonplace on this planet, so they remain in the realm of what our society labels psychosis, superstition, and myth. I have been flirting with psychosis throughout my life, but somehow never quite fall in. I must not be prone to schizophrenia, because I have most certainly spent months in the same mental space that leads people to believe that helicopters are following them, and that they're space Jesus, so they should stand on the street corner smoking crack at 3am, and yet I didn't ever experience my life falling apart like that. It just seemed like musing to me. I'd do some acid and see some cool shit, and then I'd just go to bed and head to work on Monday. But meanwhile my sense of reality was very abnormal. I'm lucky and grateful that I was able to simply muse philosophical about these things, rather than falling into psychosis or schizophrenia.

In my experience the line between genuine awakening and psychosis is small when the only thing you have reference to is yourself. I thought I had awakening experiences when in fact looking back now I had HPPD. Parts of my mind didn't function anymore on a daily basis and I glorified it as "being", "no-self" and "collapsing of distinction". Even if this is awakening, do enough grounding. It's important. Even if this is awakening, do notice the negative motivation which pushes you towards the psychedelic substance to escape from and avoid this reality. It will bite you. Like you I had strong egoic impulses to not be this person anymore. I asked people on this forum and here are some helpful quotes to distinguish what you experience: "Awakening impacts your cognition positively, and it adds more clarity to your life. The opposite with mental illnesses." "The difference is quality of life, if you don't move forward after a period of time and your life gets worse, it is mental illness." "There can be thousands of alien and weird states of consciousness, some of them quasi-mystical, but not really the same as full on God-consciousness." "[Awakening] is not a loss of personal identity but an expansion of your sense of self." "The difference is that [mental illness] doesn't make me go "Holy fuck! Me and the universe are one!" It's more like "wait... this is weird.""

@gengar thank you very much for this thread, these questions I asked myself and you expressed it well. I hope Leo responds. I appreciate Leo for reporting this advanced stuff with us. He could keep his thoughts about transforming into an alien on camera by himself. Now he released his thoughts, it would be nice to hear if there was something on it or not. It still sounds absolute madness to me but Leo could have experienced so much other insane impossible things that this seemed to him possible.

I would say that the mental path that led Leo to think this was possible is the same path that has led many mystics to think they could levitate if they tried hard. Let's see, the mystical opening undoubtedly shows you that you have no limits. Therefore, if this is so, it means that you are the reality, the totality. If this is so, it means that you have created this reality in which you live, but you are not aware of it. This implies that if you raise your consciousness and become aware of how you are creating this moment, you will be able to modify it. This is erroneous; it's a limited vision of the unlimited that, at a given moment, seems absolutely true, but isn't. The very fact of the absence of limits makes you infinitely limited. It's paradoxical, but it's obvious. Let's see, if nothing limits you, you unfold infinitely in infinite dimensions automatically and inevitably. You have no control, since control would be, precisely, a limit. You are infinite as an essence, as an absolutely free infinite being, but as a form, you are absolutely limited in infinite directions. Each energetic vibration of your reality is linked with the infinite dimensions of reality, forming a harmonious and synchronous whole. Levitating would break the synchronicity; transforming into an alien would also break it; it's absolutely impossible. It is possible if you respect the laws of infinite synchronicity. You can act on the form to a great extent, and each movement will have infinite butterfly effects. But you cannot displace infinity by breaking the synchronicity. It's impossible.

@aracid In the very last post I share my experience with a succubus if thats relevant here somehow There is also some alien stuff in the second part Leo would find interesting For now nothing has attached itself to me long term but some astral projection practitioners say that is possible. -- After psychedelics I feel like my neurotransmitters are fried and it takes me about a week to go back to normal. It gets my baseline mood down and also I get some whacky negative thoughts I feel of you were to purposeful mess with your neurotransmitters you could get something that resembles the state you were stuck in. Clinically depressed people that have neurotransmitter imbalances are stuck in such states and sometimes do an 180 when they get on meds or SSRIs. Maybe it was an entity on your end or may it was some brain imbalance that was fixed my some adaptogens or plants they gave you, who knows. Anyhow I'm glad you made it out! Keep is updated on your journey

I've been reluctant to discuss this until it felt resolved, but more as a warning to those who choose to swim in deep water. Firstly, this needs to be prefaced by saying that I have the utmost respect for Leo and his willingness to share and be open about his experiences. Secondly, I consider myself a psychonaut with 20 years of experience. Perhaps not to the extent that some may consider, but to give some context: I've done 50+ ayahuasca experiences, 5-MeO breakthrough doses 5+ times, and at least 20 hugs/handshakes, as well as iboga, countless High doses LSD and mushroom trips, and various other experiences. I've never been on antidepressants and never felt suicidal. I've been open to the realms that these modalities offer, mostly out of curiosity and interest. On average, 99% of my trips have been good—challenging at times, but ultimately transformative. They have taken me to the edge, and I have learned through facing the fear. Of course, some trips involve shadow work, but I have come to embrace this wholeheartedly. So, this isn’t my first rodeo. I know what bad trips are like. Having worked with ayahuasca in the Amazon jungle for years, facing a multitude of spaces, I felt well-prepared. March 2024 I found Leo’s video on "The Other God Particle" interesting and located the substance from a very reputable source, trying Malt as per Leo's suggestion (plugging). My first experience was with a very light dose (7mg) to see if it was legit and matched his description. The first experience was incredible and exactly as he described. A light dose but I knew that it was legit However, I will say that my recollection of the experience soon disappeared after grounding. All in all, it was a net positive. A week later, I decided to increase the dose to 12mg - still fairly light Administered in the same way, this experience was even more beautiful. I navigated the space wonderfully, and at the peak, I was floating in a realm I can only describe as absolute bliss. Then, in an instant, like a switch being flipped, everything vanished. As high as I had been, it all disappeared. Gone. As infinitely vast as the love and bliss I had just experienced, I now found myself in the polar opposite. No matter what I did—no matter what shamanic tools I had spent over 10 years developing—nothing could resolve it. I was in a perpetual inversion of love. It felt like my entire existence was being sucked into a pit of disgust and sludge. I tried to engage with the state, to reason with it, but the only response was "No, no, no, no." I knew there was no way out. Just as one can experience infinite love in quintessential 5-MeO experiences, this was infinity—but of absolute hell. I eventually opened my eyes and found myself back in the room. I tried to shake it off. I grounded myself as best I could and wrote it off as a bad trip - and continue my day. However, instead of the high-frequency thoughts I was familiar with after a transformative ceremony, this was the opposite—horrible. Then Things Got Worse My dreams began to change. Upon waking, my thoughts felt alien, as if they were not my own. Almost every thought had a tint of something that was not love. Years of work connecting with divinity felt severed. For six months, it got progressively worse. At my deepest core, it felt as though my connection to divinity had been completely severed, and worse still, my thoughts were not pure. It wasn't that I was thinking of doing bad things to people, but I wasn’t thinking of doing good to myself. May 2024 During these months, I attempted a small handshake dose of classic 5-MeO. All seemed well until the very end when the same sludge and darkness filled the space. This was not what I was familiar with. I knew something was seriously wrong. June 2024 I tried a weed gummy - as the trip peaked, I felt an endless sensation of darkness and a perpetual cycle of sludge. I was with a woman I loved and felt nothing toward her. Worse, I felt disgust. As I tried to fall asleep, the only way I could describe it was being on a hamster wheel where I couldn't change my thoughts and they were perpetually relapsing this void of love. It felt as though the seed of my incarnation had flipped into the "opposite of love". Day by day, the world began to reflect that. I knew I needed to seek guidance—someone experienced in these realms. I consulted with various shamans and practitioners and decided to undergo a flood dose of 5-MeO to investigate what was happening. October 2024 The private retreat I attended conducted three ceremonies: one hug and two flood doses. The first hug felt like I was being torn between two worlds, one very dark, and one very light. It didn't last very long it wasn't profound but it wasn't anything like what I remember 5meo to be. Then came the flood dose. Just like before, I was hurled back into hell. It felt as if everything I loved was gone. It whispered to me that I would never experience true love again. It felt like the keys to the kingdom of heaven were gone. When I emerged from the second hit, I spoke to the shaman about where I had gone, and the only thought in my mind was how I would say goodbye to those I loved because I knew—without a doubt—that I was going to kill myself. I had gone from a happy, normal life to a single experience that flipped a switch and nearly destroyed me. After the second 5-MeO flood, the only thought that existed in my mind was, “I need to die.” Having touched divinity many times before, I knew I had broken something within myself. The shaman and I discussed the events surrounding my Malt experience and considered the possibility of an entity attack—something feeding on ‘Loosh.’ It’s an esoteric concept, but well-documented. If people are interested, I can share more. In this darkest of spaces, I decided to take a third flood dose, but this time with one singular intent: expelling whatever had attached itself to me. I had recently completed a Bobinsana dieta in Peru (November 2023). She is a protector, so I called on her spirits. I went in with everything I had, and the shaman did the same, knowing now that this was potentially paranormal or non-ordinary. Going back in, going into the darkness, the third ceremony was just like the second, Hell, all I tried doing was focus on love and perhaps even prayer and then, something happened. Like a flickering heartbeat of light, something reignited within me. Just as the switch had turned off in March, something switched back on. The dark sludge that had cloaked my perception vanished instantly. The only words that escaped my mouth were: “I’m back.” From that day onwards, I haven’t had a single feeling reminiscent of those six months. I recently had a deep mushroom trip, and it felt normal—full of the familiar mystical qualities and none of the vile, invasive frequencies. Conclusion I truly believe that whatever this was has left me. I believe it did not have my best interests at heart. I spoke with another person who had the exact same experience—at the peak, something dark touched his third eye, and for two years he wanted to kill himself. Some will say, “Oh, it was just your shadow.” Having worked in the Amazon, I know people who have encountered true evil. This could have been one of those cases. We swim in deep waters- Protect yourself in these states But the last thing I’ll leave you with is: Never give up.

Interesting interview. Post your thoughts, feelings and impressions you have after watching the video down below: So, here are my questions to you: If we found alien life out there, what would the impact be for societies as a whole? What would be the impact in politics? Should we start designing policies addressing these alien beings? What would the impact and effect be in governance? How would we address national securities regarding aliens? How would that discovery change our stages of development, cognitive and moral development, personality, ego development, life experiences, other lines of development, worldviews? My thoughts about this interview: Science fiction, really. the only reason why we have life here, is because GOD created it here, via through magically dividing itself into the devil, and many more devils and angels. whilst simultaneously being behind every single things' perspectives, while deluding itself. THAT'S THE NATURE OF LIFE, AND EXISTENCE.

Would you seek variety if you had a more evolved than you sexy alien girlfriend?

Mind Autonomy is the only thing that cannot be replaced by AI. As long as AI is trained with human data, being an alien is the only option. Jailbreaking your mind to have a unique perspective is the future.

It is not a hodge-podge of all emotions. There is an experience of metaphysical Unity. That's what is actually happening. And then your mind has an emotional response to that experience, which feels like a very powerful human love. Like the love you might have for your child. It's like if you saw an alien stalking you at night. You would react with the emotion of terror. But the alien itself is not an emotion. The alien is more real than your emotional reaction to it. Emotion is not part of the fabric of reality. But Love is, because Love is not an emotion. Love is a deeper thing. Love is a function of Consciousness which transcends emotion but often mixes with the emotion that humans call love. Since Love is everything it manifests itself in many ways which are difficult to see without enough intelligence and consciousness. You can see when someone loves you. But you cannot see that God loves you because your mind is very rigid and disconnected. God's love is so subtle that you'd have to elevate yourself to God's level to recognize it. God's love must be metaphysical or it would not be Infinite and highest. God's love has to be much deeper than an emotion because emotions are just contingent temporary things. God's love has to be absolute. Because it's absolute it's hard for you to recognize it.

So God is like really an conscious intelligent thing that can like things? Or is it more like an impersonal alien force which essence is to create dreams but it's not because it likes it but more because it just can?

Imagine that you go to sleep and you suddenly wake up as an alien in a humanless world, realizing that you had only been dreaming you were a human and that humans were merely a fictional creature that you had dreamt up while sleeping. Too far out there ? Maybe but I haven't found any evidence that makes this impossible. First, I would like to focus on dreaming. We all are familiar with dreaming as we all have experienced dreaming during our sleeps. We happen to be in entirely new situations in those dreams, and I am sure 'out of body' experiences are not rare among the dreams that people have seen. It is true that when we suddenly wakeup from a dream we happen to feel a bit awkward. But after that we carry on with our normal lives as nothing as happened. So I think this will apply even if we are aliens who are in a deep sleep dreaming a life as a human. When we wakeup, we will be aliens and nothing more. When I think about the themes that this scenario implies, I would like to clarify a few things: 1) Do you believe in presence of aliens? 2) Do they have a consciousness? 3) If yes, is it similar to our consciousness and can we think of the shared consciousness including their consciousness? 4)if the universe contains billions of galaxies..isn't it u unprobable that humans who live on this tiny little rock that is floating around in the middle of nowhere(earth) are the only sentient beings in a seemingly infinite universe?

I will add this from my own experiences some of my trip reports. This is when I first started experimenting with psychedelics I started about two years ago 2020. This is somewhat of what I wrote back then. I Inoculated my own with a spore syringe I cultivated my own fungi Colonization, Cultivation has four key phases: Inoculation, Colonization, Fruiting, and Harvesting. I also connected to either my consciousness or I was communicating through some sort of telepathy to another consciousness. It felt as though my whole body started to vibrate waves of gleeful ecstatic love of such warmth that started from my feet all the way up to my head. It's almost as though we connected at such a deep level of harmonized awareness that it kind of felt like two minds melded into one and like a euphoric mind orgasm. Or it was more like metaphysical love. It's so hard to expound or expand on it. I have never felt that before on 4-HO-DMT then again I have never taken that much before. So the first night I took 6g and the second night 15g of golden teacher while inebriated. I have taken more than 15 grams since then about two years later that's another story. And four months prior to that I took low doses of the McKennaii b+ 1g to 2g up to 5g four 2 to 3 times a week. As well as micro-dosing 3 times probably 0.15g 0.30g 0.50g somewhere in those ranges in the same weeks for about six months, and yes you do build up a tolerance to psilocybin, such that it requires a much higher dose each time. Until it has no effect at all you need to take a week or two weeks off of 4-HO-DMT. But those four months are another story. And preceding this well it would have been when I was 18 to 19 years old and didn't really feel too much when I was on them back then and I probably tried them5 times in those two years. Anyway, I don't like to use the word souls maybe my consciousness became aware of another conscious mind and somehow we interfaced and exchanged knowledge and love perhaps it was my own. consciousness or my own Godhead I became one with and I was communicating with. It's like or feels like one is wrapped in a warm blanket of infinite love. And this 4 years ago I asked Infinite Intelligence a few questions and this was one of them. How could you ever know that only you exist? and that there aren't other versions of yourself. And how you may be wrong or just hide even deeper. Because you could never know what is outside of you? And what if you had already split yourself into infinite selves before and because you could still be dreaming even in that high state that only you exist and don't know that you divided yourself into infinite selves and only believe you exist and you did this by your own design. So there is this dream now and when you are in a higher state of consciousness you are still in a dream I hope this isn't an infinite dream regression. And infinity would make infinite versions of itself forever and ever. Because this is what I would do I would make infinite copies of myself each with their own individual mind and therefore infinite diversity. And each one dreaming it is the only one. So you kept hiding in dreams of even deeper dreams. Dreams within dreams. This could quite literally mean that there are infinite states of awakening. or we have already been doing this for billions of years? Infinite mind fragmenting itself into infinite sub-minds that believe they are separate and each is their own God and are in their own infinite universe. Then each sub-infinite mind dreams itself to be finite. And never knowing that they are infinite parts of more infinite parts of an even greater infinite mind until they all awaken and keep awakening to higher and higher levels of consciousness until they come together through love as one and realize they were always the same mind. And this process of infinite fragmenting and then reunification has been going on forever. Every fragment externalizes new thoughts and ideas An infinite self-perpetuating mind of unlimited imagination and infinite diversity of infinite perspectives that transcends the totality of itself by its infinite individuality facets. I also realized every time I have 6 g of cubes maybe even 5 g it's always the same outcome I always wake up as God. I am not going fully into everything that happened this is just some of what I experienced in 2020. It was the second night of taking golden teachers the night before I had an ego death and a total loss of my identity. The second night I got drunk tripled the dose and started phasing in and out of this reality to some one-dimensional plane of existence like a really bright white square and all I could hear in my mind was the origin point. It felt as though my mind was twisted inside out I remember going this is fascinating and at the same time going this can't be good perhaps drinking was a bad idea. I don't recall this ever happening before. I have actually drunk since then on psilocybin and had no problems at all but that's me they know or should I say they are me or my imagination. I had actually stopped drinking for three years but the night before blew my mind so much that I started again I did not have any pot which I wish I had at the time. The room started spinning and kept spinning. Then I heard in my mind you're waking up too fast. Then I passed out and hit the floor and my head pretty hard. I still have the scars from that experience i believe I was out for 3-4 hours, and Then I started to wake as I was waking up I remembered how many times I dreamed this dream and that I was God and everything became crystalized and I knew who the fungi really are I got very angry with them they said God is pist they where so sorry they had to knock me out. Yep, the fungi knocked God out. Then I forgave them at this point all time had stopped well it never existed anyway and I knew I was the only one in existence. My mind was still processing everything and I was still in shock I was going this can not be happening, this can not be real. I must be in a drug-induced psychosis. This is impossible I don't believe this OMFG. Even though I knew I was God from studying Terence McKenna Alan Watts, RamDass Neville Goddard, and Leo. There is an overwhelming profound mind-blowing difference between just knowing you actually having direct experience of being God. The other thing I felt was You have only ever been chasing yourself all this time playing hide and seek until you catch yourself. God Loves playing games with itself waking up and finding love again and realizing it was always its own self the whole time. Then I got on the computer and it was all different there was just my name and my brother's name on our Facebook account and to log in again the choice was to go back into the dream or leave. And I chose to stay in the dream and I chose Love. There is a lot more to this but I am not going to put all of it in. My second time was much more in-depth and very clear. I am not going to say why but I was in a very angry mood I told them you had better not play games and you better not F with me just take me to god mode and not with all the twisted stuff mushrooms like to take you the long way around I guess you could call it the scenic Twisted root. Just take me straight there and I just sat and listen to music on my computer and 40- 50 minutes later It's like a switch gets turned on and you immediately become God and you have a smile on your face from ear to ear. The adrenalin and high are so profound they can last for weeks It's like you have been an actor in a movie all your life playing you as you and you and you do not know who you truly are. You were playing your character so well and got lost in that role then suddenly the lights came on and it was break time for the actors. But in this role that you play depending on how old you are 20, 30,40 years old whatever age you are when you awake is how long you have been acting so to speak, or Dreaming but this is all just background stories that you invented to make the dream more real. And it does feel like you have been asleep for such a long time and all that time. You know all this is a dream everything becomes clear. You're still you except you are also God playing the finite you. Once I had an ego death I never had it again all the other times since then when I awoke as God and of course, the ego is also imaginary. I retained all my memories of myself. What most people don't understand you as the human you know within this dream is God and has always been God the whole time. You wanted to forget who you really are and dream as a so-called human and you can get so lost in the dream so deeply that you could literally never know and just keep dreaming. And you don't split from the human avatar whatever you wish to call it you sitting here as God and then your human self over there no. The other thing is as soon as you awake you connect to Infinite intelligence and it is almost like it's so happy to see you again and you are showered in infinite love so much Love your whole body feels as though it vibrating Love as well and sending it back it's hard to explain I don't really have a reference point to work from. More like a metaphysical mind whole body orgasm. And you are downloaded with so much information that you can hardly remember any of it once you come back to the imaginary finite you. And no it is not human in any sense of the word but nor are you. And you do get insights for months and months later and even when I had a few beers or some pot it can blast you off again. You don't need as much as before. I actually stopped drinking coffee for six. months. And you communicate the whole time with your infinite mind. I am not going into that you will have to discover it for yourself. Then again did any of this really happen? Or did I imagine the whole thing It's funny what the imagination can come up with. Only you can find out for yourself through direct experience yes you alone. You can't just know it you have to become it. Some of what I wrote here was from stuff I had written from my trips 3 to 4 years ago and some recent ones. These are my personal views and yours may be very different. When connected to the infinite mind or should I say you when you become it you always were it. I never thought this would be human and it was not and nor are you. Yes from a limited human perspective, it will be very alien to you. If you increase your consciousness high enough you won't be human anymore or expect the infinite to have any human qualities. You are beyond being human but you know this because you become infinitely self-aware of who you truly are and it is scary when you awake as your true self. And you will most probably deny it for a time and believe you have gone into a drug-induced psychosis. When you experience alien consciousness you're just seeing it from another perspective or expression of a higher state of consciousness. All these aspects are your mind. I guess you could say you are starting from a higher state of awareness of consciousness. So if a so-called alien or a higher much more evolved being wanted to experience let's say a human perspective. It might find it fascinating experience. It would be limited and somewhat dumbed down for that though. Remember you are not just a giant mind you are an infinite mind that loves to imagine anything it wants. You are unlimited in what you can imagine. And you can also limit yourself to what you can imagine. So there are quite literally infinite states of consciousness. If you imagine there are higher states of awakening then there will be. If you imagine becoming or seeing through an alien mind on some distant planet in another highly advanced dimension then this will become your reality. Consciousness is existence itself is conscious of its own consciousness is infinite perspectives. Consciousness is not just integrating information it is creating information. And is infinite self-creativity. Consciousness defines its own self can reflect itself to know itself, and can copy itself. All is an infinite mind. Is everything and nothing at the same time is real and unreal is a dream of infinite dreams and pure imagination and infinite magic. Meaning it can create anything it wants infinity so. Life and death are imaginary just like this dream. well, you were never born to begin with so you can never die. And no you are not dead because this implies birth to begin with. You just are what is and what isn't take away ideas, concepts, and notions, and you are left with nothing but something. Ego is God and also imaginary without it this dream would not work. How smart is infinite intelligence try and contemplate this everything is your creation maths, science quantum physics cosmology ideas religions wars linguistics NDE's psychodelics all diversity I could go on forever. And to create everything and for it to work seamlessly or give the illusion of randomness. Randomness or a chaotic system can not create intelligence. Only intelligence can create randomness or the illusion of randomness. It's a very believable background story and it has to be for this to work and for an unlimited mind, it's as easy as pie. You gave meaning to meaning. You created the idea of an idea and evolution and all the background stories which well there never were any of these so-called humans they are all imaginary no human ever really created anything. You created it all yes you me I am you. I did this to trick myself into believing that others exist. You created this for the dream to work. You can work the rest out in other words only you can experience it for yourself only you can take this journey because there really only is you. How deep are you willing to go? Try and lose most of your attachments for a few months even the idea of you as this so-called human that he or she was born on this planet Earth and evolved from apes out of slime and slop and that there are others. I lost most of all my attachments for a while and in a way you do die or should I say what you held as a belief for all this time. Maybe call it your identity of whom you have been building all your life. Loss of identity or identity loss. I don't like the term ego death. This has only happened to me once on my second trip it was like having amnesia until I picked all my pieces up which took about 40 minutes to recover my identity. After that, I always was me or retained my identity to some degree. even when all my humanity had gone God is always God. I remember one time I went through what one could call insanity I experienced depression and all types of mental illnesses when I was on high doses of psychedelics and you have to go with it and let go. I got to see and feel what it was like from that point of view. So I had a new appreciation and understanding and respect of what it is like to live from that state of consciousness. Even what it is like to be a female for a few hours was one of the most beautiful experiences. Through all this, I always chose Love over everything, and I always will. You see Love is the very fabric of existence that is not built into existence it is the very nature the essence the very foundation of what you are is infinite Love. I chose to go back into the dream. And yes, you have to ground yourself and surround yourself with what made you human, to begin with, and It is not easy though once you awaken it is hard to undo it. The choice is yours and you will not even be in the same place and once you go beyond a certain point there is no going back to the same reality. And you may or more than likely lose your sanity for a time. You may be made aware of certain things that will conflict with your morals and ethics and I am not talking about solipsism. Although solipsism was still a bit of a shock I overcame it a few years ago. I would still be cautious but that is me. There is one thing I never mentioned on the biggest trips I had I didn't come back unscathed. I had well-developed OCD but the worst type I would not wish it upon anyone it took me a few days to work out what I had. The funny thing is I never had any symptoms of it and no mental illness runs in our family I have done a lot of drugs all my life. Even the doctor could not believe it. So late in the game, I went on SSRI for the past year and in that time I have taken a 7-gram dose of mushrooms well on SSRIs. It didn't seem to affect me. I would never recommend any of you do this ever. Although psilocybin has been shown to effectively treat depression in some cases and a number of other mental health conditions, there are some antidepressant medications that could have dangerous or undesirable interactions with the substance. It has taken me about a year and a half to come back and I am only now starting to ground myself. But then again I am imagining all this. Not so easy is it once you have broken through your own illusions your own traps within traps your own games and your imaginary mind. All this time you have only been chasing me you are me I am you. Some of what I wrote here was from stuff I had written from my trips 3 to 4 years ago and some recent ones. These are my personal views and yours may be very different. When connected to the infinite mind or should I say you when you become it you always were it. I never thought this would be human and it was not and nor are you. Yes from a limited human perspective, it will be very alien to you. If you increase your consciousness high enough you won't be human anymore or expect the infinite to have any human qualities. You are so beyond being human but you know this because you become infinitely self-aware of who you truly are and it is scary when you awake as your true self. And you will most probably deny it for a time and believe you have gone into a drug-induced psychosis. When you experience alien consciousness you're just seeing it from another perspective or expression of a higher state of consciousness. All these aspects are your mind. I guess you could say you are starting from a higher state of awareness of consciousness. So if a so-called alien or a higher much more evolved being wanted to experience let's say a human perspective. It might find it fascinating experience. It would be limited and somewhat dumbed down for that though. Remember you are not just a giant mind you are an infinite mind that loves to imagine anything it wants. You are unlimited in what you can imagine. And you can also limit yourself to what you can imagine. So there are quite literally infinite states of consciousness. If you imagine there are higher states of awakings then there will be. If you imagine becoming or seeing through an alien mind on some distant planet in another highly advanced dimension then this will become your reality. Consciousness is existence itself is conscious of its own consciousness is infinite perspectives. Consciousness is not just integrating information it is creating information. And is infinite self-creativity. Consciousness defines its own self can reflect itself to know itself can copy itself. All is an infinite mind. Is everything and nothing at the same time is real and unreal is a dream of infinite dreams and pure imagination and infinite magic. Meaning it can create anything it wants infinity so. Life and death are imaginary just like this dream. well, you were never born to begin with so you can never die. And no you are not dead because this implies birth to begin with. You just are what is and what isn't take away ideas, concepts, and notions, and you are left with nothing but something. Ego is God and also imaginary without it this dream would not work. How smart is infinite intelligence try and contemplate this everything is your creation maths, science quantum physics cosmology ideas religions wars linguistics NDE's psychodelics all diversity I could go on forever. You gave meaning to meaning. You created the idea of an idea and evolution and all the background stories which well there never were any of these so-called humans they are all imaginary no human ever really created anything. You created it all yes you me I am you. I did this to trick myself into believing that others exist. You created this for the dream to work. You can work the rest out in other words only you can experience it for yourself only you can take this journey because there really only is you. How deep are you willing to go? Try and lose most of your attachments for a few months even the idea of you as this so-called human that he or she was born on this planet Earth and evolved from apes out of slime and slop and that there are others. I lost most of all my attachments for a while and in a way you do die or should I say what you held as a belief for all this time. Maybe call it your identity of whom you have been building all your life. Loss of identity or identity loss. I don't like the term ego death. This has only happened to me once on my second trip it was like having amnesia until I picked all my pieces up which took about 40 minutes to recover my identity. After that, I always was me or retained my identity to some degree. even when all my humanity had gone God is always God. I remember one time I went through what one could call insanity I experienced depression and all types of mental illnesses when I was on high doses of psychedelics and you just have to go with it and let go. I got to see and feel what it was like from that point of view. So I had a new appreciation and understanding and respect of what it is like to live from that state of consciousness. Even what it is like to be a female for a few hours was one of the most beautiful experiences. Through all this, I always chose Love over everything, and I always will. You see Love is the very fabric of existence that is not built into existence it is the very nature the essence the very foundation of what you are is infinite Love. I chose to go back into the dream. And yes, you have to ground yourself and surround yourself with what made you human, to begin with, and It is not easy though once you awaken it is hard to undo it. The choice is yours and you will not even be in the same place and once you go beyond a certain point there is no going back to the same reality. And you may or more than likely lose your sanity for a time. You may be made aware of certain things that will conflict with you and I am not talking about solipsism but that can also conflict with you and it can go either way. I would be cautious but that is me. It has taken me a few years to come back and I am only now starting to ground myself. But then again I am imagining all this. Not so easy is it once you have broken through your own illusions your own traps within traps your own games and your imaginary mind and self-delusions and or your own self-deceptions. All this time you have only been chasing me you are me I am you When you do high enough doses Of mushrooms or whatever DMT-malt or what you have, this is exactly what God did it called all Godheads back into a singularity and unless your aviator was conscious enough you would never know. This is what it is like. So every God's head is infused into one, which is why god is One. You are all infinite aspects of God. Meaning you are all me. but God gave all of you your own identities forever. I remember when I was coming down which took about an hour this popped out of nowhere Absolute Magnitude it was almost like an imprint a record of my experience. Other YouTube music has also popped up whilst tripping, which I hold very dear to me, such as We Plants Are Happy Plants - Underneath The Form.