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Lol, you’re funny though. Is your main need just being able to ramble about anything? I’m saying this respectfully, but it’s genuinely funny to read your posts because they’re so intricate. No, I mean, I do have needs, but I was suicidal for a while. I expected the world to have more to offer, and the cause was basically the same feeling as finishing a video game and being stuck in the endgame with no more content left to really explore. My desire for death led me toward truth ( but it's the reverse as people suffering from feeling stuck, I had nothing to be stuck about ), but it wasn’t what I expected. It does fit your explanation of the character becoming self-aware in some way, though. I feel like I’m hope-maxxing now, with the added possibility of AI happening, eventually leading to UBI and some kind of large-scale human liberation, where we can all just chill, live happily in communities, and do some Final Fantasy Zanarkand-type living. Honestly, the feeling of a “meaning crisis” is still there, but not in the same oppressive way. I’m kind of playing around with it now. I’ve become a very optimistic doom-pilled person. I’m not fatalistic. I still like striving to be the cleverest person in the room, and in some sense I feel like I’ve won. I can joke about genocide, death, Hitler, or whatever else because I’m extremely detached. I can do that with basically anything, even argue against everything I supposedly stand for, whether that’s my culture, my race, or whatever other bullshit story. I do fancy myself as a good person, but I’m detached from human affairs to the point where, honestly, I don’t really care about the state of the world or whether my words ultimately affect people positively or negatively. There’s much more I could say. Sometimes I feel like I’m the most “intelligent” person on Earth, and I don’t even mean that as a good thing. I don’t mean intelligence in the sense of some fancy ability to understand advanced mathematics. I mean that, if intelligence can involve being able to detach yourself from everything, from language, perspective, identity, and even life itself, then that’s something I feel I can do better than almost anyone. Even the hippie or the Buddhist is usually still attached to something. Even the guy who dies through extreme meditation can still be attached to escaping worldly experience or transcending desire. I’m detached in a different sense. I simply let desires and needs happen within this point of view without treating them as fundamentally important. And even on the ordinary human plane, those desires are relatively weak. Sometimes I still get a sudden peak of delusion around achieving some goal, or the reverse: a sudden conviction that everything is meaningless. I removed my post because it felt too personal. I don’t really like oversharing my identity online unless it’s within my private spaces. Yeah, you’re right about a lot of what you pointed out. Still, I don’t really judge normies for being normies. My judgment is mostly just fancy gaming. I’m special, and you’re special too. Just look at your post. You’re posting on this wretched edge of the internet. You really think you’re a normal person now? Girl, you’re an absolute weirdo, sorry. No amount of self-proclamation that you’re normal is going to save you either way. You can go back to being an alien, because you are one! I mean, alright, nowadays everyone is kind of crazy, so the bar has shifted dramatically in terms of what normieness even entails. We might all just be mildly convinced schizophrenics who occasionally need a puff of some nice self-narrative to keep the whole thing coherent. And in the end, what even is “normal” or “weird”? It’s just another layer of fanciness. But yeah, of course, if being "a normie" feels nice, just be one. Whatever makes you happy. I’m still convinced that almost everyone on this forum is some kind of nutcase, basically a functional asylum with creature who somehow learned to operate in society.

So, two things can be true here. One is that your perspective may be genuinely different and un-relatable to many people. That's what I experienced growing up as a kid, and it was really hard for me to fit in before I developed some advanced level social skills that simply weren't attainable for me as a child. And chronically not fitting in can create this "I'm different in a bad way" shame dynamic early on. The other perspective is that, when people have these issues with fitting in early on.... they can begin coping with that issue by building the identity of the person who's "different in a good way" and trying to differentiate themselves more and more and more from ordinariness and averageness. And they can do that by being different in a hierarchical way (being better)... or being different simply in a different way. And I did both... and you seem to do both. And for me, this differentiation coping strategy helped in certain ways because I was able to develop an identity and MO for myself that was unique from others where I could challenge societal rules that I didn't agree with, find my particular values, and develop myself in ways that few others do. But this differentiation tendency had A LOT of collateral damage that I wasn't aware of until about 5 years ago... when I realized what my aversion to ordinariness and sameness was doing to me. The collateral damage was that it pushes away all parts of me that are common, ordinary, and average and repressed them in order to maintain the "Different from all others" identity that I used to cope with isolation and alienation. But this strategy also exacerbates the same kind of isolation and alienation from the original trauma... as the differentiation tendency causes a person to strive to become as superiorly alien as possible. And it carves us out as islands. And when I was a kid, this came through as me imagining myself as non-human mythical beings... and having all my classmates realize that I was actually an alien, vampire, or mermaid. And later on, it came as spiritual identities and intellectual identities to prove myself better and different than others. And this created a disconnect between myself and my humanity... with strong judgments towards the average human being. So, once I realized this, it's been very important for me to shed any identities or MOs that are geared towards differentiating myself from the rest of humanity. And this is why it's important for me to anchor myself in the "I am an average human being" perspective... and to cease attempting to transcend my basic bitch humanity to become some Ubermensch. This wisdom is in knowing that being a basic bitch is the best medicine for "different in a good way" people. And I suspect that your reaction to my acknowledgement of my ordinary human needs was part of that resistance to commonality and ordinariness... and maintaining the identity of "the different one." So, I would challenge you to question why you're trying to transcend your needs in the first place. Is it because you're trying to carve out an identity of being "different from the masses"? Or is it for some other reason?

Relative the dichotomy you mentioned of "subjective access' versus "empirical generalizability"... It's not that I'm saying that empirical generalizability itself is an issue. I'm just arguing for a more holistic and helpful empirical generalizability than what men currently have access to... which requires receptivity to how women actually experience attractions. Ultimately, empirical generalizability is the perspective that men have to work within, with regard to the female perspective on dating and attraction. And that isn't a problem in and of itself. The issue is that, a lot about the reality of the subjective female experience is getting lost in translation relative to the current popular models of empirical generalizability... as it over-indexes on short-term results. But it misses the fact that these paradigms in themselves create a ceiling that will make it MUCH more difficult in the long-run for these men. So, men operating through empirical generalizability is par for the course. And the current models of empirical generalizability often have tactics that are effective towards very specific measurable ends... but might backfire in the long term in other ways that are profoundly detrimental to the man in ways that he's not aware of, simply because of his lack of experience with the subjective experience with womanhood and really understanding what it's like to be a woman who's very attracted to a man. Also, the current models of empirical generalizability tend to get related to as a panacea understanding of women. That causes men who follow them and find comfort in them to hyper-attach to them... to the exclusion of the perspective of "How do women actually experience this subjectively?" And this is when those models act more like a security blanket that blocks out deeper truths that are more conducive to understand and have genuine connection with women over the long run. Honestly, if a man is so attached to these paradigms, he's not going to be able to really see and understand the woman he's with as a whole person because his cup is already too full with he knowledge of the "empirical generalizability" model that's he's using to maximize short-term success and minimize risk. Also, understanding the real subjective experiences of female attraction from a variety of women (and being genuinely receptive to these perspective) will also minimize feelings of alienation and shame, which is a major part of what causes connection with women to be scary and intimidating, in the first place. Right now, the practical paradigms end up ramping up the pressure and fear even more, because female attraction has been framed in a way within these empirical generalizability models in a way that's hyper-objective and operationalizable (as that's what gives the greatest level of leverage)... but it ultimately frames women's sexuality as something that feels alien and cold to them. So, it's really about developing a more holistic model of female sexuality that's based in the actual truth of the matter, even if that truth reveals something less certain or practically leveragable. And that requires a man to realize, "My paradigm on female sexuality was built for my comfort to minimize my vulnerabilities and to maximize my leverage in the situation. And while there are some effective practical parts of this paradigm that give me short-term measurable results, that doesn't mean that the paradigm is accurate or that the paradigm gives me a panacea understanding of women." So, it's more about getting them to recognize the limitations of these practical paradigms in general... and to say, "These practical paradigms will likely backfire on you in the long-run, if you don't understand how high-discernment women are actually experiencing these practical tactics." So, I would say... you can't develop true expertise about attracting women until you have a more holistic understanding of where your practical paradigms begin and end.

100% If I understand you correctly - You possibly learned through direct, relentless feedback from reality/real world experience. Trial and error, and probably a good mix of variation within that experience (and contradictory feedback), meaning you incurred less bias. But also, to learn what you did most likely also meant you DIDN'T prematurely close in on a frame and become locked. I don't know how you experience Ni, but for me it is really tacit. I have no fucken idea how I come to the conclusions or knowings I have - and I continually have to reverse engineer from the conclusion explicitly to understand (and I've been burned by my tacit conclusions often enough now I make a really concerted effort to never simply roll with my 'Knowings"). So often I am taken aback by conversations based on game, PUA, frame etc I used to not understand why someone would need this sort of frame to guide them, because I so naturally built one up in what appears to be an unconscious way. It becomes a map vs territory issue. Learning the frame then applying (and learning its limitations in the process) vs learning and building a frame from direct experience. Both definitely require challenges, fear, anxiety and courage. Both have different types of pitfalls. Explicit frames being learned and applied, to me, seem so alien... but I see the use. And I have come to use these methods as an alternative to my straight Ni. I am almost trying to break my Ni at this time in my life, if that makes sense. to "get out' of it, because it is so much of my processing I cannot make it out clearly. I cannot see my eyes.

@Leo Gura Understanding relativity is one of the best things in life. It gives you such a broad understanding of life. Exploring different perspectives changes you and your perception fundamentally changes. It's like tasting more of life. I'm still in many aspects not fully yellow, in some aspects i'm turquoise, in others not fully yellow. Like i still struggle to understand really less developed people, like people in islamic culture where rape isn't a concept, salvery and opression of women is normalized, pedophilia is okay, etc... Feels too strange and alien.

Hating looking “Gay” Im Bi and even I don’t want to look gay —Although I suppose in this context is more so about looking weak and submissive rather than saying you’re into guys. Also Bi =x= being into guys. It simply means that whoever you find attractive, you will fuck. Kinda like how they did it in Greece/Rome (—minus the slut shaming for the submissive partner) I imagine this is how aliens operate: If sexual organs, then they are bi or are under a similar doctrine—It’s not about attraction to the body, it’s about attraction the other creatures soul/ressonace. If non sexual organs than asexual—It’s inconvenient to have a desire for into course with no outcome for reproduction——Unless the alien wants to play the game that way of course, for some reason. Bi is a sexual evolution—something requiring a higher development in society in order to maintain and sustain. Tier 2 sexuality in a sense—As it is literally ‘Bi’—Fusion of both poles—sexuality. However, This doctrine already makes sense for me as I am already energetically androgynous—like MJ or other figures and rockstars—And I notice that this actually stabilizes my energy 3x and makes me feel like 5x more intelligent, and naturally more tolerant of others, but idk. I wonder how it works on someone with a more standard operating system. Experiment: Try to imagine being attracted to another’s—anyone’s—soul rather than their body. Open to any sexual experience of any kind. How does that possibly sound. Does it feel natural? Expansive? More spiritual? Higher order? How do you feel in your body? How about in your mind. What do you experience? Your energy? Does it feel deconstructing as a Truth? Let me know how it turns out, Testing the hypothesis with other people is great for the development of this field. Attraction Is for the most part Is cultural conformity— (People being attracted to the nape of a girls neck or black teeth in Japan, a girl’s heel in England, flat chests during the renaissance, etc). I like what I like of course, I’m just saying there’s no reason to limit yourself in attraction or experience for the sake of your culture, etc. Free your mind to all possibility. That is a higher order.

You realize how racist that sounds? (this one: " I think for him it's simple: Palestinian = backwards religious lunatics and terrorists. I think many people look at the issue as one of backwards Muslims vs civilized Israelis, and side with civilized Israelis ") "Israeli IS more developed than Palestine" I am really curious to understand how you come to that conclusion. What constitutes development to you? Because to me it is linked mostly with moral development, not technological development. "There is a xenophobic aspect to this as well. Muslims are just more alien to the West than Jews. Basically, people are simple-mindedly picking the less alien side." This is like 90% of the true reason, just good old racism and xenophobia and the medias are a huge factor of that They are still traumatized from 9/11 25 years after which clouds their judgement

I think for him it's simple: Palestinian = backwards religious lunatics and terrorists. I think many people look at the issue as one of backwards Muslims vs civilized Israelis, and side with civilized Israelis. Of course that's not my view. But I understand the allure of that view. If you are not deeply informed and objective, then civilized Israelis seems the better side. Israeli IS more developed than Palestine. That's the bottom line for many people. They are choosing based on development level, not morality or justice. There is a xenophobic aspect to this as well. Muslims are just more alien to the West than Jews. Basically, people are simple-mindedly picking the less alien side. For someone like Trump, he's thinking about it like this: Would I rather be allied with rich Jews or poor Muslims? The answer for him is obvious.

Within Buddhism they sort of acknowledge a lot of mystical experiences that don't have much to do with the path to the cessation of suffering, just like in Christianity that they have all kinds of ideas about miracles, demons and angels, etc. But we know that their goal is none of those things, they are just part of their universe. I think this is what can make religions have a certain flavor of what is possible within their universe, meanwhile others might not even register something as plausible. Like focusing at breaking down your field of consciousness is an extremely alien idea to Christianity, meanwhile within Buddhism it's close to the techniques they use to achieve their goals. So to them, acknowledgement of the truth of the ego as a construct is absolutely bizarre, because they think your soul is this indivisible entity that was spawn once in your birth (or as a fetus, or whatever, even before your dad's sperm entered your mom's egg, because some are against using condoms). And then Christian's use that "eternal soul" idea to peddle stuff like that you're going to eternal suffering in hell or will be reborn back to earth once a special day comes and the sinners won't get eternal pleasure, and that will depend on your moral following of Jesus teachings. Within Buddhism the idea of rebirth is more fluid so it leads to other secondary conclusions, like the mind being reborn due to desire from moment to moment, or you being reborn as a shit eating fly if you are too obsessed with your girlfriend or wife in the moment of your death because you want to be close to her at any cost lol. But also you can be reborn as a higher being like some alien that feels a thousand orgasms per second, but even then you're not exactly enlightened.

Yesterday I remembered this old robotic dance gorup on YouTube called Dragon house that I used to watch years ago. I decided to search them up and I found some new videos and dancers. What was really interesting as I started to watch these videos again is I found that they give me a really similar feeling to the ego-dissolving experiences I had on psychedelics that I mentioned in the first post in this thread. These dances have a really strange, weird feeling to them (but really cool). They feel alien, robotic, non-human. I find this feeling to be especially deep when the music sounds and feels equally strange and robotic. I find that when I watch these dances now, that strange, alien, almost disturbing feeling they provide has the exact same effect as what I experienced on psychedelics. When I watch it, feel into it, really take it in, I start to get such deep ego dissolution. It's like the weirdness is a barrier that the ego cannot pass through. The more I focus on it and feel into it, the deeper the ego dissolution becomes. I don't imagine other people would experience the same thing, I'm guessing this has to do with me being as close I am to permanent ego death, but I think it is so interesting that weird and unusual things like this consistently have this kind of ego-dissolving effect for me. Here are some of my favourite videos I've been watching:

We all know psychedelics promote neuroplasticity, and I had decided to take full advantage one particular evening by taking 4 tabs of lsd and 4 grams of penis envy mushrooms. I do these kinds of trips like once a year, usually with some ketamine and dmt in the mix to really go as deep as I can without pushing my limits too hard. I have a high tolerance, so I would not recommend doing this unless you start small. But what you can do on any trip is listen to some crazy ass music and see what happens - it's like dropping a catalyst into your consciousness, and you just simply bear witness to the chaos that ensues. I put on this tune called "Earther" by Giant Claw, and the results exceeded my expectations to such an extent that it became extremely overwhelming. If you start to freak out, consider staying for a bit longer because maybe there's a lesson there. I've found this to be very true on psychedelics - the longer you stick with a problem, the more you are rewarded for it. However if it comes to the point where you're completely losing consciousness for periods of 5 seconds and between those intervals you feel violent bursts of electricity rupturing through your body, that is a good time to stop. Just turn on some ambient and you will be be fine in 5 seconds, like a baby. Other bizarre psychedelic experiences I've had include but are not limited to - Flying backwards upside down through an alien matrix and being plugged into their "internet" Smiles and other qualia occupying physical space, as if coming to me from across the room The feeling of being sent to a parallel universe that never fully went away Seeing open-eye hallucinations in absurd resolution Subrealities opening up within a localized part of my field of vision The purest, most radiant light I have ever seen coming out of my hand These things can really surprise you. And I'm trying to lean into that here! The light was a lot like this image, only 10x more radiant.

What could give reality fullness if theres no sense of separation? Sounds it would be "empty" Seems the "I am" - awareness state you mention, if you mean self as empty awareness in head, can be filled with thoughts and energy, and perhaps also some kind of base level neurological self-structure/mechanism, so it seems theres still individual self there but in backround somehow empty head, being the space in which all that is contained, although still charged limits yes. The neurological thing I mentioned seems to me unshakable (as in long term) or at least here.... Sounds chill but if thoughts are less prominent in that state, then how about emotions in the body? If I my ask, but I know theyre different, we dont wanna live from our minds too much anyways so maybe not so reasonable to compare the two but its alien state for me so I ask

One problem with Langan's CTMU paper is the relative lack of references. If you don't show how your work is similar (or dissimilar) to previous work (which unless you're an absolute alien on earth, you should be able to do in some way), you make it simultaneously hard to actually understand your work and it shows you might not actually know about what works exist and that you can't actually show how it's unique (rather we have to trust your word for it because you have some jargony term that we pseudo-understand when you explain it). The scientific/academic community appreciates very much if you can identify a hole in existing knowledge and clearly show how you're filling that hole. If you're just constructing an almost completely self-contained system from the bottom up with no references to outside things, don't be surprised when that lack of referencing is reciprocated.

It is interesting to think that Alien ships could be closer to biblical angels abstract shapes in appearance. Usually when we depict aliens they have ships that look like fish or cutlery and the aliens themselves tend to be just humans with attitude. Maybe it's just too alien to imagine.

@OBEler I remember you posted about Sadhguru recently. He has an alien story. I cant find the original video now, but he talks about it on the Joe Rogan Experience.

Well, do you mean UFOs or Aliens here? I cant recall a convincing video about an Alien. I know there are several pictures that could be absolutely real. Either way, my standpoint is still that its more likely than not that there is non human intelligence on earth. I stay opemninded about it. My uncle swears that he saw an UFO by the way.

@Sandroew its just normal spirituality talk with some science fiction. take any rumi book or whatever and write a chatgpt text the alien should tell. Nothing new.

@OBEler What i found interesting about it is that the Alien has a better methaphysical understanding than what i imagine a normie could come up with operating from a materialistic point of view. Im not saying its head on, but they surely did research during the creative writing process. Do you think its just full on larping and i just see into it too much ? I also like that he says nuclear war is going to happen in about 50 years which would put it right at the start of Trumps first term. But its easily explained with the video itself coming out in 2016 i think. Its also pretty cool that he talks about AGI, which is a super salient topic today, but not in 2016. Except within science fiction i guess. So thats why i like it, i think of it more like a meme, rather than reality. And yes i absolutely entertained the idea that it could be real somehow, but i admit its rather silly. Maybe i shouldnt have posted it in this topic though, because now i became the disinformation agent.

@Olaf Or maybe watch less RSD videos and think for yourself. Any potentially positive influence, which RSD can be, should eventually be reverse-engineered for the effect it has on you. Same with chocolate, porn, money, internet addiction, validation, meditation, ideology, whatever. Don't merely consume the stimulus and become better conditioned by it. Work backwards through the conditioning until you understand why it was capable of moving you at all, then feed that understanding back into consciousness itself. Imagine a hypothetical being doing this, an alien, for example. Every time it encounters some phenomenon that strongly affects it, the final product of its analysis isn't merely another piece of knowledge stored somewhere. It extracts the underlying pattern and applies that pattern recursively to itself. Understanding something about attraction might alter how it regulates attention. Understanding status might alter how it represents hierarchy. Understanding addiction might reveal something about salience, prediction and reinforcement. Every genuine understanding produces an immediate alteration in the organism doing the understanding. For effect, imagine that instead of calling this "wisdom", which is often too abstract to feel physically consequential, every successful piece of reverse-engineering gives the alien an extra limb, another sensory dimension, infrared vision, another axis of movement. Now knowledge isn't decoration, knowledge changes the architecture of the knowers eyes, what they see and how studying that seeing, returns the seer renewed. At that point you're no longer merely a cloned puppet of your influences. You're beginning to understand the engine underneath the patterns that reproduce themselves across the social system strongly enough for entire societies to remain behaviourally coherent. And first and foremost, most of you are slaves and don't even know it. Slaves to emotions you did not consciously design, thoughts whose vocabulary existed before you did, dreams assembled from inherited cultural templates, relationship structures you absorbed before you were capable of evaluating them. Even your body wasn't selected by you. Its existence is downstream from decisions, accidents, values and circumstances belonging to other people, beginning with each of our parents. The point isn't that "the external system is rigged." That's precisely how these influences can hook you, while giving useful advice that keeps the hook justifiable. We're rigged before we are capable of having an opinion about the system. We enter existence inside causal machinery already operating, so our genes, nervous-system architecture, parental reinforcement, language, reward, punishment, attachment, imitation, status hierarchies, sexual conditioning, culture. Long before "you" consciously choose anything, enormous portions of what later feels like you have already been installed as tendencies, associations and categories. The only meaningful movement out of that isn't some vague instruction to pursue "consciousness growth". That's too broad. It skips the machinery. What matters is understanding the relationship between cause and effect inside experience, sso how the nervous system constructs significance, value, how perception becomes salience, how concordance becomes thought, how thought recruits identity, how identity generates action, and how repeated action feeds back into the model of who you believe yourself to be. Take any perception that strongly interests you, view it as a flower, then slowly peel back every layer of it abstractly until all that's left is a seed; its essence. Now plant that seed in yourself and now every perception, more and more overtime, becomes the only life you ever needed from the external environment, life, sun, water, fertile soil and seed, that you learned to turn into inner ingredients that you gave yourself. Some people ask the overly broad question too much, "What is consciousness?", what if you were to live in a way in which you solely operated based on its function in the context of sentience? That is, to become sentient and more sentient. This is where life begets life. Is this not the principle of life after-all, for life to beget life for whatever natural positive/negative forces are needed for that arrival? The gift we have received, sentience, is the gift we've been given to transform this principle of "Life begets life", into something we use to transform ourselves. Now as it concerns "social skills", what is the most fundamental principle you can think of? Probably communication right? What predicates the sophistication of our external communication and therefore the people we're most likely to attract in our sphere relative to skilled movement across our planet? The way we communicate with ourselves. Our self-communication is the art and science on learning the relationship between emotion, thought and identity curation within consciousness, and how memory and our prefrontal cortex, can be used to establish a feedback loop between experience, time and consciousness growth. This is the very essence of what I have been talking about, where we implement the gift that sentience has given us to unrig ourselves from the environments feedback loops, and rig ourselves as much as we can to what make up the inner feedback loops of consciousness where growth and experience, beget more growth and experience, aka "life begets life". As for more on inner communication, I'll leave the rest for your own discovery.

@trenton HEy, can you ask him if his girlfriend can send you her video and can you upload it here? Cant be that difficult. "it was just a black screen as if the entire film was just deleted and blacked out with no sound. " I am a software developer, I look on technical side. A captured video with just a black screen is as mysterious to me as seeing an alien on it. So please if you could upload the black screen video from his girlfriend? If she claims she has deleted the video this whole story will probably fake.

im not a real woman i’m an alien woman

Inspiration I know I wrote a little bit about this in the first post in this journal but I wanted to expand on that a little for reflection purposes. Here are the things that are inspiring me in no particular order. 1. Coping I feel like one of the ways that I cope with all of the chaos happening around me, even when I'm in a position where I'm doing everything I can to take care of myself and the people around me but I still find myself succumbing to existential dread, is that I imagine myself in my 70s or 80s. I imagine myself as an old woman and being surrounded by kids or young adults who ask me *what was the 2020s like?* And then I start off with *well, it all started in 2016 with an ape named Harambe in the Cincinati Zoo.* Then I go into all the wild shit that I encountered after that. Because when I'm in my 70s or 80s, I'm sure I'll be able to look back at this chaotic decade as my lore or, at the very least, some degree of humor. Because the way that the world is going on now, yes it's scary but it's not going to be like this forever. So you might as well take everything in and have something interesting to say. I also think that as I have been doing the research for this that this project has been a source of hope for me. I think over all I'm trying to envision a better world and send a more positive message of what we can build, not only so that we have a path out of this when it all falls apart, but also so that we have something driving us through the chaos as well. 2. An Interest in the Time Travel Genre / Depiction of the future. This was one of my favorite media tropes growing up (and even now). As a kid I loved the show Time Warp Trio and I distinctly remember my dad introducing me to Back to the Future when I was 11 years old. I loved the movie Meet the Robinsons and the various episodes across different TV shows that featured the same thing. As I moved into my teens, I loved the show Cold Case that featured a group of detectives in the present day trying to solve murders from decades ago and they have to interview people from that time period and the show flashed back to what life was like back when the crime was comitted. I also loved media that depicted the future such as the Jetsons, or dystopian novels like the Hunger Games, Divergent, Uglies etc. But I did notice a problem with this genre of media. They tended to over estimate the technological advancments while underestimating the social advancements. Or, they would try to bypass this problem by setting something so far into the future to where it's like *sure we might have flying cars 200 years from now. * The first time I was aware of this issue was when I watched Back to the Future again on October 21 2015, a day before my 16th birthday. Back to the Future Part II was released in 1989 and the main character goes into the future to October 21 2015 and they have crazy shit like hover boards, flying cars, and other crazy technologies. And I remember looking around at October 21 2025 and being like... yeah I don't think we're going to achieve that anytime soon lol. Then, later I noticed that a lot of the depictions of the future we have in the media at any given time typically has to do with how we feel about the present. I think that can be seen especially with the rise of dystopian content over the last 15 years that depicts the future as bleak as a way to warn us about our present day social ills and provide valid commentary on it. I think it can also be seen if you contrast today's dystopian content to the way that the future was depicted in the 60s, the 80s, or hell the 2000s. And sure, the optimism from that time seems a little silly now since we don't have flying cars in 2026. But I think we can still benefit from a degree of optimism in seeing a future that is worth fighting for while still being grounded by what's going on right now. I don't think it has to be one or the other. And if anything, I think that can address a lot of the problems with this genre and the way that it imagines the future. 3. An Interest in Cyclical Social Development. I feel like I'm a social scientist at heart given my educational background, the type of content I gravitate towards, and the way that I analyze media and the world around me. I feel like theories like the Four Turnings and Sprial Dynamics can help with giving insight of what we're growing towards and what obstacles we may encounter along the way. I like the way that it depicts things like backlashes, collective progress, regression, dismantling systems etc. And I think it can address the common pitfalls in imagining the future as a result. One of the reasons why people over estimate technological progress and underestimate social progress is because we project our current paradigms and our current biases of how we feel about the present on to the future. The way that bias shows up is by thinking in linear terms when thinking of history, rather than cyclical ones. We think that the future is going to be dystopian because we are engrossed in the era of Crisis and we think it's always going to be like this, so we imagine a future of the crisis as something that linearly or exponentially gets worse instead of a future where the crisis eventually dies down and new systems are created to replace the old paradigms. We thought the future of the 2020s was going to be a technological paradise according to the optimism of the 60s, 80s, and 2000s because we thought technological progress and the increase of quality of life was going to be linear. And I think imagining progress in the context of cycles is a more nuanced way of making predictions or imagining a future that doesn't seem alien or outlandish both in a positive or a negative way. 4. My Own Journey of Development as a Person and as a Writer I have many goals in my 20s. One of which is writing a book. I came up with that goal given how much I journal and I figured that I would probably have enough material to write a pretty good book. At first I thought that it might be self-help related. But now that I'm no longer neck deep in self help content like I was from age 18 to 22, I don't think that's the case. After reading through many of my journal entries, I thought that I had a very good way of capturing the current moment and that I'm skilled at thinking in systems, and analyzing social dynamics. At first, I thought of writing something fictional based on my personal experiences and the experiences of others regarding the present day / the 2020s. Then I was like *what if I combine my knowledge of these cyclical ways of thinking and my interest in the time travel genre to make something set in the future.* I also thought of the general messages that I want to send as the over arching theme of what I'm trying to say and things just started to click. I also looked at a journal entry from years ago that I thought was interesting: And I think writing this book is a part of that. I also think that you can pack in way more life lessons and things that stick to people emotionally that would want people to better their lives through things like fiction as opposed to nonfiction or self help. I think fiction forces you to empathize, imagine, and emotionally connect to integrate messages more than nonfiction and self help. I also think this will be more of a challenge for me because much of my experience in writing has been in the form of journal entries, the essays I have had to write in school, and succinct writing in corporate/ business settings. I don't think any of that is bad or hurts me. I think the journal entries are a good way for me to reflect and generally speaking have practice in writing so that the skill doesn't erode after school. My educational background has been helpful in me imagining various systems and social structures in my world building and it has been helpful in analyzing other pieces of media as well. My writing in my job forces me to be direct and succinct which enhances how coherent and easy to understand a narrative is. At the same time, those are not the same skill sets that are essential for writing fiction. I have little to no experience in writing fiction (unless you count creating character designs for your friend's Wattpad Hunger Games fanfiction in the 8th grade as experience). I feel like if I was an artist, rather than being a painter, I would be the architect that is gifted in drawing detailed blueprints of a beautiful building. That has it's own merits but it doesn't have the same result as a painter who can capture the look and the feel of an image as opposed to getting bogged down with the technical details. I think writing this book, as opposed to something nonfiction or self help related, would challenge me more as a writer and expand my skills. And I'm not going to lie, it's intimidating. I don't know how I'm going to write these characters or their archs. I'm really bad at writing flowery prose without sounding like a fake deep Tumblr emo kid. I'm not good at painting an image in people's minds when it comes to describing a setting, a mood, a situation etc. Dialog also feels incredibly intimidating because I don't want it to sound like a bad Netflix original. I'm really good at identifying bad fictional content because I have witnessed them and I have, in some cases, produced them when I was in the 8th grade or into my high school years in the form of cringey journal entries where I was trying to be something I was not by writing in a voice that didn't sound natural to me. But yeah.. this project intimidates me and excites me. It's going to stretch my intellectual and imaginative capabilities. But I also get to delve into a lot of the things that I'm already interested in and have that be fuel to create something greater. I don't know how this is going to turn out and I don't think that if I write this book that I would publish it, but it is a interesting challenge that I want to present to myself.

We have to rewrite The Matrix a little, like the relationship to tech and the mind has to remain passive, like today, as Ai-out as yous want it, however the tech can still be present and alive, but more like how Neo starts talkin to his computer in the beginnin, As then its like, 'you got this code of Alien talk that happens on a normal prompt, and then, thats the matrix... just chattin... Sayin whatsup... And tryina stay in that realm, for death is akin to one of these dimensions you can fall in, which isnt necessarily easy to do (meaning, the dimension/paradigm...) i mean... death is easy cause everyones pointing to it, like "Youre gonna die, And youre gonna die, And youre gonna die, And youre gonna die"... Like... Its not just people pointing to it, but the layers of conception and imagination are pointing to it, as a very finite, triad, birth, death, life, birth, death life... or you kno wat i mean. I really like rats and cats, as i feel for the cats. They are not good at conceptual thinking however, true.

You're not alone in the universe but you're alone as the universe and the alien thing is probably just a reminder that you can spice up the human experience a little bit or go off and play the part of new sentient being with more amazing tech if AI doesnt pan out for you on earth.

If you think I haven’t spend years of my damn life going through my deepest and inner demons, fears, selfishness, self-deceptions and biases, I don’t know what the hell have you been reading, as I have been extremely vulnerable sharing my journey on this forum. But of course, if you are committed to seeing me as the problem, you will not see anything else, especially yourself as the problem. I admit I am not happy with my dating and I am trying to fix it, sharing my lessons here, asking for thoughts and open conversation, and overall being vulnerable, yet respectful — but I am faced with accusations of ego and having holier than thou mindset. What in the world. Becareful you guys are not living in your mutually created bubble, where Miguel is too egoistical to admit his short-comings. I have also talked to Aurum on phone recently. In there we seemed to agree, but here he seems to be against me. Hopefully not because it is just popular. There are people who support me on this, but they are more quiet and do so more via pms. Just becareful guys that when publicly you guys love to gather and go against me together, that it isn’t just bias and a self-defense mechanism to actually look deeper within yourself, and to actually be open to what I have to say. - - - - - At the end of the day, I am simply trying to have more honest, truthful, authentic, and vulnerable conversations and connections with people I meet. I am not claiming that I am Alien God.